Points Underneath
by breathe4her
Summary: Life can take you places you've never thought imaginable – but is it possible that the imaginable is what you've been searching for all along? - Wash It All Away Sequel
1. Starting Over

**Author's Note: **I am back with the continuation of Spencer and Ashley's adventure. If you haven't read the first part (**Wash It All Away**), you may want to do that first. It takes place after that. So...do Spencer and Ashley find their way back to each other? Does Ashley smarten up and chase after her dream girl? Will Carmen ever succeed in getting with Spencer? What other adventures will this story take you on... Read ahead and find out!

**Title:** Points Underneath (WIAA Sequel)  
**Disclaimer:** I do not own SoN characters. All disclaimers go to Tom Lynch and The-N. Other original characters belong to me.  
**Rated: **PG13 – NC17  
**Summary: **Life can take you places you've never thought imaginable – but is it possible that the imaginable is what you've been searching for all along?

**Flashbacks are in: **_italics_

**Prologue – Starting Over**

**Spencer's PoV**

I felt warm breath on my nose and cheek and tried to open my tired eyes. I finally fought the heaviness of my eyelids and opened them, smiling at the sight before me. A small smile graced her lips as she breathed softly in her sleep. The light freckles that danced on her bronze skin, her long eyelashes unmoving as she slept soundly.

I glanced over at the clock beside my bed and rolled over slightly. **6:29am**. The alarm was about to go off and when it did, the body next to me jumped slightly.

I turned back around and grinned. "Morning beautiful."

She grumbled and threw the pillow over her head. I laughed and pulled the pillow away from her, ruffling her hair. "Can we just skip today?"

"No," I laughed and sat up, stretching my aching muscles. "Come on, go get ready baby."

"But," her grey eyes blinked at me and her pout formed perfectly. God that girl was definitely my whole world, "Mom, please can I just not go to school today?"

"You will go to school," I ushered her out of my bed and she grumbled something about being an eleven year old with no fun.

"And why were you back in my bed?" I asked her in the bathroom as we stood in front of the mirror, brushing our teeth together.

A morning ritual.

"I watched a scary movie last night." Lucas frowned. "I needed to feel safe and you're always safe."

I grinned and we both rinsed our mouths out at the same time. Lucas spun around and let me brush her long blonde hair back in a neat ponytail. "I'm going to have to talk to the babysitter of yours about this," I said and swatted her butt, "now go get your school clothes on, I'll be downstairs making some breakfast."

I was downstairs when I heard the front door open and close. I knew who it was and smiled as her red hair flowed behind her. "Hey."

"Hey honey!" Ryn grinned and put her purse on top of the mantel. "You're up early."

"Yea," I rolled my eyes and put on a pot of coffee, "and so are you."

My best friend grinned and shrugged. "I thought maybe I could help you get Lucas ready for school and then go out for breakfast, but it looks like you're already making breakfast." She watched me crack an egg into the frying pan.

"You're more than welcome to stay." I softly smiled.

"Okay!" Ryn smiled and moved to wash her hands, helping me with getting some toast ready.

"Auntie Ryn!" Lucas giggled and gave the woman a hug.

"Squirt," the redhead grinned and tickled Lucas. "Oh, Spence?" She looked at me. "I don't think I can pick up Luc from school today."

"That's okay!" Lucas smiled and sat at the table with a sketch pad. Yea, she was that talented. "Mom said that she's going too."

"First hockey practice of the season." I grinned.

"Ouu, Coach Carlin, is it that time of the year already? Oh my God, I'm going to lose my two favourite girls in hockey again, aren't I?" Ryn gasped, tickling Lucas again, making her squeal with delight.

So much had happened in the past twelve years. I had gone off to hockey camp with Carmen and focused mainly on the sport, trying my hardest to forget about Ashley and my broken heart. It didn't work though; I just grew cold when it came to love again.

After arriving back to Midtown, it was time to move into residency and I was more than ready to start the new school year off with playing hockey and majoring in Child Psychology. I could use any distraction that was thrown my way.

Including the partying that had taken place when I wasn't playing or studying; which was my first mistake being a student in University.

//

"_Ugh, we finally finished a whole semester without breaking our legs." Carmen sat down on my bed and looked at me. "What should we do to celebrate?"_

"_Um," I twiddled my thumbs and shrugged, "I think we should head to __Toronto and catch a game…"_

_Woo. Go Maple Leafs._

"_No." Carmen sighed and stood up, placing her hands on my shoulders. "Come on Spence, think outside the box!"_

"_I don'__t know!" I pouted and Carmen rolled her eyes, pinching my cheek._

"_Go get something slutty on, we'__re going to party. There__'__s one going on at Tiffany Greene__'__s house and all the hotties are going to be there." She twirled me in the direction of my closet. _

_I thought about it and smiled. "It__'__s been like, months since I__'__ve been laid last."_

_Crude, I know, but it was true._

"_Ashley was the last person to touch you, I'__m surprised you haven__'__t slept with anyone else." Carmen shook her head. "Not for my lack of trying."_

_Carmen and I came close to it, believe me. It was when we were in Quebec City, drinking after a long hard day at practice. The kiss started out playfully which quickly developed into a full blown make-out session. Hands roamed and some articles of clothing were shed, but I couldn__'__t go through with it. I felt like I was cheating on Ashley, even though we had broken up. I just felt like I__'__d be betraying her with every word I had promised her._

"_Go get __dressed; I__'__ll meet you in the student lounge!" Carmen smiled and ran out the door. She had become my closest friend, having been accepted into the same school and played with me on the same team. We were closer than ever and you know, she was like my best friend away from home._

_Kyla could never be replaced. Ever._

_The party was loud and rowdy. I had slammed back shots of tequila like nothing and danced up a drunken storm on the dance floor. Carmen had disappeared with a hot redhead and left me alone to my own choice of potential ladies. _

_Though, through my drunken state, it wasn__'__t a lady that had caught my attention. No, in my drunken state, my brain was telling me that if I let another woman touch me so intimately, I__'__d still be betraying Ashley. I shouldn__'__t have cared, she was probably doing as many women as she could now that she was single again, but I was in love with her and always would be._

_It was a curse._

_So I turned down Carrie, a hot brunette that practically threw herself at me._

_His name was David. Tall, dark and handsome __–__ male version of Ashley._

_There was a lot of flirting going on between us through the remainder of the night. I kept drinking and we kept dancing. His tongue was shoved down my throat by the end of the party and as gross as it felt, I just wanted to __**feel**__ something and not care anymore._

_I don__'__t remember anything clearly. I do remember waking up in a bed that had Sponge Bob as sheets and a killer hangover. Oh, and I was naked._

_Nice._

_I sat up quickly, ignoring the hammers going off in my brain and looked around for any familiarity. I found nothing but a note._

_**Wicked time Spencer.  
Call me. David.**_

_Ugh._

_I threw up right then and there and put my clothes on, running out of the strange bedroom and straight home to shower._

//

"Bye mom!" Lucas hopped out of my black Chevy Blazer and ran into the school yard, playing with her friends.

I made a stop at Rapture and walked in. "Rough morning?" I raised an eyebrow at Ephiny, who just waved me off with a yawn.

"You wait until you have a seventeen year old daughter who likes to sneak out of her bedroom at night." She rolled her eyes.

"I _was_ that seventeen year old." I smirked and laid my sunglasses on the counter. "Caught Jaiden hanging out her bedroom window again?"

"Ugh." Ephiny whined and poured me a cup of coffee. "She was letting someone in last night. Chase wasn't sleeping yet so Jaiden was busted when we found her straddling that damn girl from the tattoo place across the street."

"At least it wasn't a guy this time." I shrugged.

"Oh you laugh now, Spence, just you wait." Ephiny shook her head and went towards the back. The bell chimed and I turned around to see the familiar brunette walk in with a bounce in her step.

"Hey Coach." She sat beside me and swung her messenger bag on the counter.

"Jaiden." I nodded and smirked. "So, why the happy grins? I was just told that you were busted last night."

"Grown ups and their gossip." Jaiden rolled her blue eyes but smiled. "Yea, Jyll was caught in my room – again."

"Wasn't it Steve last week?" I raised an eyebrow.

"Uh yea, but Steve and I are just friends. I've been there, believe me." She made a face and then smiled again, "Jyll is way better."

I shook my head and patted her hand. "So, about last night," I eyed her up, "you really need to stop letting Lucas watch scary movies before bed."

Jaiden looked down apologetically. "I'm sorry, it's just she does this pout thing that I can't resist and I know she gets that from you. Ugh, damn kids and their cuteness."

"I get the pout thing, I know it's hard to resist," I laughed, "but especially on a school night, please lay off the horror movies?"

"Promise." Jaiden crossed her heart and hopped off the stool.

"Jai, you're running late again." Chase came from behind the back and threw a set of keys at her daughter. "You have to work tonight after practice so please don't be late!"

"I won't." Jaiden kissed Chase's cheek and hugged Ephiny. "See you later Coach!"

"I gotta get to work." I grabbed my sunglasses and threw a couple of dollars on the counter. "See you two later."

I walked into my office and checked my messages. I was in charge of running the Children's Social Services office. My dad had helped me set it up after I retired from playing hockey. I had snapped my knee out of place during a hard body check and I didn't want to risk making it worse. So I continued to study and graduated from York University, finally accepting the fact that my life was no longer about hockey.

I was a mother and I needed to start acting like one. After the one night stand with the David guy, I found out I was pregnant and freaked.

//

_I sat nervously on the sterile bed, looking around the cold small room. I had taken three home pregnancy tests and they all had the same result._

_Positive._

_Carmen encouraged me to go to a real doctor and I did it only because my mind would not rest if I didn__'__t. _

_I was nineteen and a year away from playing in the 2010 Olympics in Vancouver. If I would__'__ve known I was going to fuck up that close to my dream, I would__'__ve definitely fought harder to be with Ashley and just tell her to shut up and deal with my tagging along._

_But no._

_We both let pride or whatever get in our way and there I was, sitting in a cold room alone, waiting for the doctor to come back and tell me that the three tests I had taken were just a joke and I was free to leave and live a normal university life._

"_Miss Carlin," Dr. Gibson smiled at me through her pearly whites and placed the clipboard beside my leg. "Looks like the home tests are-"_

_Lying._

"_-right. You'__re about ten weeks pregnant."_

"_What?" I thought she was crazy. _

_Crazy bitch doctor telling me I was pregnant._

_Whatever._

"_-are ten weeks pregnant. Going on three months."_

"_What?" I repeated and shook my head, jumping off the bed and laughing incredulously. "You probably grabbed the wrong test result, that'__s crazy!"_

"_I can test you again." Dr. Gibson smiled cheekily and I felt defeated. "Let me guess, you'__re single or you have a boyfriend who will freak out once they find out?"_

"_I'__m gay." I deadpanned. "Therefore you__'__re wrong. I don__'__t have sex with guys."_

_Except when I was stupidly drunk._

"_I'__m sorry Spencer," She looked at me with sympathy, "You__'__re pregnant. I don__'__t know what to tell you."_

_I grabbed my stuff roughly and left, slamming the door behind me. I felt like I was living someone else__'__s life. I felt like I had lost myself the day Ashley had left me. _

_I didn__'__t know who I was anymore._

//

"Spencer, case file." Ryn smiled at me and threw a beige folder on my desk. "New one, just came in."

Ryn and I met right after I moved to Kenora. I know what you're thinking, why move to a place that held such an affective memory? I couldn't tell you what exactly possessed me to move to a town that constantly made me think of Ashley Davies. It was a comfort thing. Nothing bad happened in this town and I fell in love with it the moment we stepped foot on its soil.

Ryn was the one that helped me get settled permanently. I had hired her based on her background. Her sister and mother used to be in the business of taking care of abandoned children and finding them good Foster homes. Kathryn, Ryn as I called her, was amazing with her work and people skills. She brought a smile to every child's face that walked through that door, whether they were there to find a home, or there for counselling, she knew how to make them all smile.

Lucas gravitated towards Ryn quickly. She was four when we first moved to Kenora. I had just landed a deal with my father and he helped me set up an office to get me started with the Centre. He even made a trip down and stayed until I was set up with people who would work for me and until we got a solid base when children started to pile in. It amazed me that so many unwanted children were floating around such a beautiful town. I knew at that moment that I could at least try and make a difference.

I even fostered a few children myself but they were either given back to their rightful parents or adopted. It broke Lucas' heart because she could get attached to people so easily.

I was a new mother because my parents had taken care of Lucas while I continued to play hockey and study in school. No one knew about the daughter I had except my family and Carmen, who was basically my family away from home.

Chase and Ephiny made the transition easier too. They helped me find a place to stay and even took care of Lucas when I had to work. It was a struggle at first but we all made it work. I had found time to spare once everything fell into place and one of the hockey coaches recognized me as a Team Canada player. He offered me a position to coach a couple of hockey teams and I didn't even hesitate.

I found myself again. I was a mother who loved her daughter unconditionally. I was a friend who helped whenever I was wanted and needed. I was Coach Carlin, a figure that young skaters could look up too.

Including Jaiden.

It felt good to belong somewhere once again.

//

_It looked the same. The town was small and perfect. Somewhere where I can start over and live a life as a mother, a mother I should__'__ve been the moment Lucas was born. _

"_Mommy?" Lucas tugged on my hand, her bright four year old eyes blinked at me. "What awe we doing?"_

"_Are you hungry?" I squeezed her tiny hand and she nodded. "Let'__s go and find some good food."_

"_I'__s hungwy." Lucas rubbed her small belly and continued to walk along the sidewalk with me. I had a destination and when I arrived, I was relieved to find that Rapture was still open. _

_Lucas found a seat and sat quietly, scratching her forehead before looking around. "A wot of books."_

"_Yea," I smiled and sat down next to her in the booth, "what are you hungry for?"_

"_Fwies."_

"_How are you two doing today?" I looked up at the waitress and a slow smile spread across my face._

"_Hockey girl." Chase mused and tapped her pencil against her lips. "Wow, never thought I'__d see you here again."_

"_Small world." I shrugged and smiled softly._

"_Who dat?" Lucas whispered shyly in my ear._

"_And who is this gorgeous thing?" Chase slid into the booth across from us and eyed up my daughter. "You look just like your mother," she paused and looked at me, "uh, I'__m assuming here…"_

"_Yea, mother." I replied and kissed Lucas on the temple. "Lucas, this is an old friend, Chase."__  
_

"_Hi." Lucas grinned and continued to play with the menu._

"_So where'__s Ashley?" Chase smiled and when I never smiled back, she back-pedalled. "Oh, um, I__'__m sorry, there I go again, assuming."_

"_I haven'__t seen her since graduation day," I offered softly and thread my fingers through Lucas__'__ hair. _

"_I'__m sorry Spencer." Chase frowned and stood up. "Well, listen, you__'__re back in town for how long?"_

"_Permanently." I smiled. "My dad a__nd I just opened a new children development centre, I__'__m here to help set it all up."_

"_Wow." Chase grinned. "You two decide what you want and it'__ll be yours, on the house." _

"_I wike hur__." Lucas grinned and I smiled._

-\-/-


	2. Golden Treasures

_**Yea, I know12 years is a long time passing, but trust me, it'll work out and I have a reason for it in the long run. This is just to prove that if love is strong enough, no matter where you are or what you do, it'll never leave you.**_

_**I don't own SoN. Flashbacks are always in **__italics__**.**_

_**Enjoy!!**_

**1 - Golden Treasures**

**Spencer's PoV**

_The crowd was going crazy and my heart was beating wildly in my chest._

_This was it._

_This was the exact moment I lived for._

_Face off during the gold medal game in the 2010 Olympics. _

"_Carlin, you better still be my friend once I finish wiping __the ice with your face." Mandez peeked through her mask with a grin. She was drafted onto Team USA and we were at face off with five minutes left. The score was tight._

_**16 **__**–**__** 15**__._

"_Dream on Bitch," I smirked, "the title is ours."_

_The referee blew his whistle and I shoulder checked Carmen, watching as she fell to the ice, swooping the puck that passed her head and took off down the ice._

_The crowd was cheering and it always gave me a huge adrenaline rush. I body checked a few other players before I was tackled myself. _

_Fuck._

_I got up and shoved the girl back, noticing it was Mandez. I shook my head and shoved her again, skating passed her._

"_Carlin!" Coach Howard pulled me in and gave me some words of encouragement. "Just rip them to shreds."_

_I nodded and went back out on the ice. _

_Two minutes were left._

_They had scored on us again, leaving it __**16 **__**–**__** 16**__._

"_Come on," I looked over at Kendra, my favourite team-mate who I messed around with from time to time, "just show them that Carlin tough side." She threw me a wink and I nodded, knocking knuckles with her as we skated like hell out on the ice._

_The crowd was getting louder and I glanced up at the clock. Less than a minute left. I skated fast down the other side of rink and stole the puck, passing it to Kendra. We did the move before, passing it back and forth until we reached the goalie. _

_I made a sharp stop in front of Team USA__'__s goalie and raised an eyebrow at her smug smirk. "Enjoy your silver medal." I grinned and as soon as the puck hit my stick, I shot it right between her legs._

"_SCORE!" Kendra screamed and hugged me as everyone roared with excitement, music going off in the background as cheers became louder._

_I had just lived my dream._

_I had just made my whole dream come true._

_I was going to sport an Olympic gold medal and I couldn__'__t have been happier._

//

I rubbed my temples and leaned back in my chair, waiting for the pounding headache to disappear after having a meeting with two parents who wanted their son back. I didn't see them fit as parents but I was required to at least listen to their argument before getting a lawyer to present it in court.

"Spence, line one." Ryn's voice sounded through the intercom. "It's your father."

I smiled and thanked her before picking up my ear piece. "Hey dad."

"_Spencer, how__'__s my favourite oldest daughter?"_ His laughter was always comforting.

"Perfect as always." I smiled and looked down at the picture on my desk. It was a picture of Alex and Lucas, the last time they saw each other, which was over a year ago. "How is my favourite father?"

"_Peachy__."_ I could hear his smile through the phone and then I heard a rustling sound. _"This is actually a business call. Did you get a file today marked __'__urgent__'__?"_

I looked at the beige folder on my desk, noticing the red 'urgent' stamp. "It's right in front of me. I had a meeting this morning but I was about to take a look at it. What is it?"

"_A new transfer."_

I opened the folder and noticed a black and white picture of a small brunette girl smiling. "Dylan Avery?"

"_She__'__s the one,"_ I heard him sigh and I could picture him pinching the bridge of his nose, _"She__'__s had a hard life Spence and I don__'__t think she can take another bad household. I recommended your Centre because I know with you being in such a small community, you screen your families much closer then most city Centres do."_

"Of course," I cleared my throat and skimmed through the report. "What's the background?"

"_In and out of homes since she was seven years old. Her mother had been drinking and driving when she crashed her vehicle into a tree, with her daughter inside the car."_

I immediately rolled my eyes.

Some people just didn't deserve to have children.

"_Dylan Avery was taken away instantly, thrown into a group home where she was bounced around from family to family. She__'__s been through a lot for a nine year old. Abused, abandoned and neglected. She just needs to find a stable place for once so she can finally be a kid."_

"I'm sure I can find her a really great home." I promised and skimmed through more of her file. "I have a lot of families that are interested and have children of their own about her age."

"_Like you."_ My dad offered quietly.

"Me? Uh no, dad. I'm not interested." I said and found the headache was coming back.

"_Spencer, just think about it. You__'__re the strongest person I know with the biggest heart that is made to give out love and help."_

"You know what Luc and I went through with the last boy I fostered. I can't have Lucas grow attached to someone and then have them ripped away from us just like that. We may have a smoother system going Dad, but it all boils down to being the same. Foster children come and go…" I sat up in my desk and closed the file but kept the picture out, staring at it.

"_Meet her, Spencer. Just meet her and then see, okay?"_

I sighed but agreed. It wasn't like I didn't want to take in another child, it was just that Lucas couldn't stand another heartache. She loved having friends and when they left, she felt like a part of her was leaving as well.

I knew that feeling all too well.

After getting off the phone, I called Ryn in. "Are you aware of the Avery case?"

"Yea, she actually just arrived." Ryn smiled softly and pointed out towards the hallway. "Did you want me to send her in?"

I nodded and smiled. "Yea, send her in."

"Kay." Ryn quickly got to work and I looked back at the picture on my desk. I couldn't help but see someone in her smile. I couldn't help but feel a slight pull towards the small girl.

A small noise pulled me out of my thoughts and I found the small brunette standing shyly in the doorway. Her brown eyes were full of life but her body language was anything but. Her hair was dirty and clothes were ripped.

Where did she just come from? What kind of foster parent or group home would allow a child to look like that?

"Dylan?" I smiled and she nodded, her eyes casting downwards. "Don't be shy," I got up and patted the chair in front of my desk, "you can sit here."

Dylan shuffled her feet slowly and crawled into the chair, her eyes looking straight ahead out the window. "How are you, Miss Carlin?" She finally spoke and I glanced up at her with awe.

She had manners.

"I'm very well, thank you." I sat on top of my desk and leaned forward. "How are you?"

"I smell." She scrunched up her nose in the cutest nose crinkle, causing my heart to immediately swell.

"Do you know why you're here?"

"To be put into another home." She whispered sadly.

"Right." I whispered back and jumped off my desk, causing her to jump as well. I frowned slightly and kneeled in front of her. "You haven't had many people be nice to you lately, have you?" I brushed a small curl away from her eyes.

"No." She shook her head. "My mommy was always good to me. She let me go to school and she read to me every night. Then my gramma and grandpa died and I ended up in a new home." Dylan sniffled. "I don't understand why I'm here. Why can't I be with my mommy?" Her brown eyes looked at me and I shook my head, pulling her into a hug. She was skin and bones, no meat on the girl whatsoever.

"Listen," I pulled back and wiped tears away from her eyes, "I have a daughter about your age," I whispered and grabbed a tissue from my desk as she blew her nose, "I think she will love you."

"Is that her?" She pointed to another picture on my bookshelf of Lucas' latest school picture. "What's her name?"

"Lucas." I smiled and she giggled.

"She gots a boy name just like me." Brown curls bounced as she giggled.

"Hmm," I grinned, "seems like the three of us have something in common."

"Spencer?" Dylan ducked her head. "I mean, Miss Carlin."

I shook my head and grabbed her tiny hand, pulling her lightly to her feet. "I think you need to call me Spencer. Miss Carlin makes me sound so old."

"Oh." Dylan chuckled again and sighed. "I don't want to live with another bad family."

"You won't." I promised her and opened my office door. "Do you like ice cream?"

She nodded. "I haven't had it in a long time!"

I smiled and ruffled her hair. "Why don't you go across the hall and play for a bit. I have to finish some paper work and then I'll take you out for some ice cream."

Dylan's eyes widened in surprise with the cutest grin. "Really?"

I nodded and she squealed as if she hadn't been able to laugh in a long time.

"I'm taking her home with me." I whispered to Ryn, who smiled at me and patted my shoulder. "Help me draw up the papers so we can get this done faster."

"Well since you've fostered three children in the past, it's going to be easy and quick." Ryn winked and made her way to the front desk.

I glanced back over at the young girl, sitting in the corner while reading to herself. She seemed to possess a lot of knowledge yet was so lost at the same time.

I opened the file again and finished reading it. Leigh Avery was her mother, she was charged after breaking parole with possession of drugs therefore prolonging her hearing on getting Dylan back. She went through a few rehab programs and was currently housing in one in Thunder Bay, Ontario.

I spent the next hour filling out papers and then called my father back, letting him know that I was taking Dylan home with me.

I was risking it, I knew that. But something about Dylan made me want to there for her.

"Ready Dylan?" I peeked around the corner and held her only ripped raincoat in my hand.

"Ice cream?" She looked up with a smile.

"Ice cream." I nodded. "But first, let's get you cleaned up and then we can pick up Lucas. I'll take you both out for ice cream then."

"Are you," Dylan licked her lips and sighed heavily, "are you going to take me home, Miss Carlin?"

I couldn't help but smile and nodded. I was shocked when I found her arms wrapped around my waist, her small body crying. "Hey babygirl," I knelt down and wiped more tears out of her eyes. "What's with the croc tears?"

"Please don't send me back, please?" She sobbed.

"No," I cooed and pressed my nose into her hair, "you'll be living with me, it's okay."

Dylan wiped her face and grabbed my hand, squeezing it in her tiny one. "Thank you."

Two words and I knew that this Dylan Avery wasn't just another child going through another home. She was special.

I could feel it.

I just hoped I made the right decision in taking her in.

-\-/-


	3. Some Familiarity

**Flashbacks are in **_italics_

**2 - Some Familiarity**

**Ashley's PoV**

_**Team Canada has just taken the Gold! Sneaky goal made by Spencer Carlin who had already scored well over 15 times this past week with at least eight assists, had just won her team, the gold. Stay tuned, we**__**'**__**re going to head down and catch a closer glimpse at the blonde bombshell who has rocked hockey since she was little.**_

_I turned down the television volume and smiled as Spencer__'__s face appeared on the big screen in my living room._

_Gorgeous as ever._

"_I think you like to torture yourself." Alex jumped on the couch beside me and passed me a Pepsi. "__You__'__ve been watching reruns for two days now. That shit was a year ago!__"_

"_She'__s just so gorgeous." I whispered._

"_Yea?" Alex rolled her eyes and sighed. "Come__ on Ash, we have a set list to do and you keep ogling my sister."_

_I turned off the TV and turned to face my roommate. "I know, I__'__m pathetic."_

"_Slightly." Alex sneered and threw a pen at me. "Now write down your song choices."_

"_Shouldn'__t we just let the label do this?" I asked, getting up and stretching._

"_You are my label," B__aby C dropped her notebook and crossed her legs. "Okay, so you__'__re my manager, but still. Ash, I want to get this stuff finished before sending out my demo next week."_

"_Alex," I smiled and patted her head, "relax, okay? Everything'__s going to be fine."_

"_Easy for you to say." Alex grumbled. "Why don'__t you just… call her?"_

"_Right, I haven'__t seen Spencer in three years and you expect to just call her?"_

"_Why not?" _

"_Why don'__t you?" I threw back and she immediately shut up._

_Alex and Spencer weren't exactly on speaking terms. I personally thought it was all petty but that was just me. _

"_Look, let'__s just work on the songs for the record and move on." Alex sighed and blew hair out of her face._

"_Or," I smiled and pulled the notebook away from her, "we could have some fun?"_

"_I'__m not sleeping with you." Alex laughed and I rolled my eyes._

"_Please, this body belongs to one Carlin and one Carlin only." I pulled her up and dragged her over to the spare bedroom. "Let'__s make music, not war."_

_Yea, I made our spare bedroom into a music room. Instruments everywhere with music sheets scattered at every corner. Alex Carlin was the hottest thing in Victoria, B.C. She was lining up gigs left and right and I had scheduled her first demo to be recorded with the newest label __'__Mad Muzik__'__. _

"_We should play '__Samantha Taylor__'__." I played my fingers over some keys of my piano and looked at Alex. "Have you spoken to her lately?"_

"_The other night she called," Alex smiled, nodding her head, "she'__s in Australia right now."_

"_Cool." I nodded my head and smiled as the sound of her guitar filled the air and then her voice followed._

_Alex Carlin was going to be a star. She was going to do wonders with her music and I was just happy she chose me to help her along with it._

//

I glanced out the window that was three stories high and pressed my hand against the cool glass. A bird was on the ground, picking up sticks for its nest.

The sky was grey and I listened as the wind howled, the tree branches blowing strongly. Lightening could be seen ahead but no rain had yet to pour.

"Hey," Matt, a fellow housemate came up to me, "Jase and I are going out for a smoke, you in?"

I sighed. "I told you I don't smoke," I shook my head and pressed it against the glass.

"Come out with us anyway." Matt shrugged and grabbed my arm; I brushed him off. "You've been in this place for five months and have barely stepped outside unless absolutely necessary."

"Your point?" I pushed myself away from him and made my way down the long hallway, towards my room.

I closed the door and pressed my back against it, tilting my head back. The same routine every day and I couldn't wait until I could just step out of this place and find my way back to her.

I glanced at the small frame that was perched untouched on my desk. Her eyes were full of joy, her smile was full of grace and her spirit was happy.

I just wanted to grab her and hold her in my arms.

I closed my eyes and swallowed. It felt like forever since I've held her, seen her, heard her voice.

I missed her more than anyone.

I pushed myself off my door and turned my stereo on, grabbing the CD case and listening as the voice of Alex Carlin flowed through my room. I studied the case, like I had done so many times before.

Reading lyrics that we worked on together years ago. An album we created together, helping each other out into a better and exciting new career.

Her eyes were full of mischief on the cover of her album and she looked so innocent. She was twenty one when we landed her first CD debut and Baby C's been working on her fourth album on her own.

I missed her too. I hadn't seen her for over a year and even though she called me every now and then, we had drifted somewhat over the past four years.

A knock came at my door and I pushed pause on the music as a shorter heavyset blonde poked her head in my door. "You have a visitor." Karen said, she was the 'help'.

"Not today." I waved my hand and shook my head. She smiled sadly and opened the door wider.

"Um," she shifted from the door, "it's Miss Carlin," she whispered and I sat up, smoothing out my clothes and fixing my hair, which had grown a lot since I last cut it.

"Send her in." I licked my lips and bit my lip nervously as the rock star herself, walked in. The last time I saw Alex, she was wearing baggy jeans and tight shirts; it was all tight at that moment. Her dark denim jeans were glued to her skin as her shirt barely covered her stomach. Sunglasses always placed on her head and darker make up. "Hey," I stood up and she immediately grabbed me into a hug.

"God Ash," she sighed and hugged me tighter, "it's been forever."

"Look at you," I pulled back and wiped the tears that formed in my eyes, finally some familiarity in my life, "you're all grown up."

"I grew up a long time ago." Alex smiled and placed her guitar down on the bed, looking around my plain room. "Wow," she said and frowned as the walls were completely bare with the exception of her first sold out concert poster she had signed for me, "how can you not be severely depressed?"

I raised an eyebrow at her and shook my head. "What's that supposed to mean?"

"Well," she approached my desk and gently brought her finger over the solid oak frame that held the untouched picture and looked back at me, sadly, "it just seems like since you've spent the last five months of your life here, you'd have other things hung up in your room to make it more… comfortable?"

"I don't need comfort." I shrugged and sat down on my bed, smiling at the familiar guitar case. "So, do I get a private show?"

Alex chuckled and opened the case, pulling out her very first guitar that she had ever showed me a little over twelve years ago. "Actually, I just wanted to give this to you."

I raised an eyebrow. "Uh, but that guitar means everything to you."

"Sometimes it's nice to share things." Alex smiled and placed the guitar in my hands. "Seriously, take it."

"How'd you find me?" I finally asked, looking up into her smoky grey eyes.

"I'm a rock star," she smirked and threw her sunglasses on the bed, "actually, I did some research, found out you had a rough time this past year. I was worried about you when I didn't get any emails back from you or phone calls."

I looked away and watched as the darkened clouds came closer. "I feel so lost."

"I know." Alex patted my leg and grabbed the guitar back from my hands before pushing me down onto the bed and held me. "Ash," she ran her fingers through my hair, "I cut my tour short, I'm-"

"Did you find her?" I asked, my heart racing.

"I did." She held her breath and placed a kiss on my temple. "I wanted to stop by here first because," she sat up and placed her hands on my shoulders, "I don't know if I'll be back."

"What?" I frowned.

"If she needs me, I want to stay with her and you have to focus on getting better." Alex sighed and shook her head, letting out a sad laugh. "She needs to know you're absolutely better before seeing her again."

She was right. I needed to be on my best and not fight the system.

"Will you at least keep me updated?" I pleaded quietly.

"I will." Alex smiled and stood up. "Please keep the guitar. The moment you see me again, you can give it back if you want. It's a guarantee that we'll see each other again."

Alex stayed for a little while longer as she told me about all of her concerts, photo shoots and studio time. She mentioned that she missed me as her manager but understood why I gave up that dream and allowed her to go out on her own.

I glanced inside the cover of the album 'Midtown Young Love' and smiled.

**Vocals, lyrics & composed by: Alex Carlin  
Producer, lyrics & composed by: Ashley Davies**

-\-/-


	4. Don't Look Back In Anger

**_Hopefully any confusions or questions you have will be cleared up as the story progresses. I know it's a little all over the place at the moment but it'll come together and answers will be revealed. It's a little more angst-y than WIAA, but life isn't always puppies and rainbows, is it?_**

**_I don't own SoN._**

**Flashbacks are in **_italics_

**3 - Don****'****t Look Back In Anger**

**Alex's PoV**

"_Hey!" I scowled as Spencer shut off the music that was playing in the living room. "I was listening to that."_

"_And?" She shot back while turning on the TV. "Go listen to music up in your own room."__  
_

"_Wow," I glared at her and shook my head, "want me to remove the bitch stick from your ass or will you do it yourself?"_

"_Fuck you." She shot back, blowing hair out of her eyes. _

_Spencer was back from York after her first year during the summer. Carmen was spending it with her own family so she decided to come home and make my life miserable. Not on purpose._

_I didn__'__t think it was anyway._

_She had terrible mood swings and couldn__'__t take a joke. I was getting tired of it and I knew that our parents were noticing it as well._

"_Why did you even bother coming home this summer? You'__ve been acting like a bitch." I frowned and she turned to look at me, guilt washing across her face. "What happened at school?"_

"_Nothing." She immediately closed up again and went back to watching a hockey game. At least that much hadn'__t changed. "I__'__m just tired."_

"_Then take a nap." I sighed and slid down on the couch, resting my feet up on the table. "Did you see that post card Ashley sent?" I asked casually. _

_Of course she had seen it. Our mom had put it on the fridge._

"_No." _

"_Really?" I raised an eyebrow. "She travelled to __Alaska with her parents and sent us a pretty post card. You didn__'__t see it?"_

"_No."_

"_Huh," I slouched even further and grabbed the remote, switching the channel, "seems your head is farther up your ass than that bitch stick."_

"_How the hell d__o I put up with you?" Spencer stood up and threw a pillow back on the couch._

"_Question is how d__o I put up with you?" I stood up, face to face with her. She was slightly taller than me but not by much. __"Seriously Spence, what the hell is going on?"_

"_Nothing!" Spencer stomped off towards the kitchen and I followed her. I stopped and noticed that she was inspecting the post card, her fingers dancing along Ashley'__s writing. Her head hung and she just started to cry, falling to the floor. _

_I was at her side quickly and took the card from her hands, placing it back on the fridge. "Hey now," I whispered and pulled her into my arms, "why are you crying?"_

"_Because," she sniffled and her shoulders sagged a bit, "she'__s just so fucking stupid!"_

_I quickly pulled back and shook my head. "What?"_

"_Ashley could'__ve found a way to make it work! She didn__'__t have to break up with me, she didn__'__t have to be all __'__noble__'__. God," Spencer cried and curled her fists in a ball, hitting the floor hard, "she was right," she stood up and violently wiped her tears away, "she should have never fallen in love with me."_

"_Spence, you don'__t mean that!" I gasped and stood up to face her again. "Ashley did what she had to do. She cared so much about your dreams; she didn__'__t want to stand in the way."_

"_Yea?" Spencer laughed incredulously. "Whatever."_

"_Look, at least she sent __**something**__. What have you done for her?" I raised an eyebrow._

"_Nothing." Spencer whispered. "I need to be alone."_

"_Surprise, surprise." I rolled my eyes at my sister and shook my head. "__Go and take your nap. Come talk to me when you__'__re done being a self-centred bitch."_

"_Would you stop ca__lling me a bitch?" Spencer growled and pulled me back, turning me around to face her. _

"_Well then stop being one!" I yelled and poked her shoulder slightly. "You'__ve been so moody! I miss my sister."_

_Spencer sighed as if she were slightly defeated. "Yea, me too."_

"_Spencer," I said softer that time and frowned in concern, "please, just talk to me," I paused and shook my head, "did you sleep with Carmen?!"_

"_No!" Spencer frowned and quickly shook her head. _

"_Then what is going on with you?" I asked again._

_Spencer finally dipped her head and let out the most painful sigh before her eyes flickered to mine. "I__'__m pregnant."_

_I was sure I was going deaf. _

_Spencer could not have just said she was pregnant._

"_Okay," I laughed and pushed her slightly, "shut up and tell me the truth."_

_Spencer growled. "I just did."_

_I grabbed onto the counter and held myself up. So that was what mom felt like when Spencer told her she was gay._

_Gay._

"_Oh God," I cupped her face, "are you okay? Do you want me to kick some ass?"_

"_What?" Her quizzical look caught me off guard._

"_You were tak__en advantage of-__"_

"_No." Spencer whispered. "I was just being stupid, I wanted to feel something, anything and what was I supposed to do, wait around for Ashley forever?__ I was drunk and I was in the moment at the party.__"_

"_What?!" I screeched and stepped back, glaring at her. "You fucking slept with a guy? You'__re an idiot! This will __**kill**__ Ashley!"_

"_Ashley?" Spencer shot back. "I'__m the one pregnant and you__'__re worried about how __**Ashley**__**'**__**s**__ going to feel?"_

"_Well if you would'__ve kept it on your pants!" I shook my head. "God that was stupid of you."_

"_Why did I even tell you?" She screamed and brushed passed me. _

"_If Ashley were my girlfriend, I would'__ve never let her get away," I lowered my voice, "and I would__'__ve never deceived her by getting knocked up by some random guy at a fucking party."_

"_You know what then, little sis?" Spencer grabbed the collar of my shirt and narrowed her eyes at me. "If you'__re so fucking in love with her, why don__'__t you go chase her?" Spencer grabbed her purse and car keys before slamming the front door behind her._

_I stood there, feeling numb, feeling scared, feeling… lost._

_Ashley and Spencer were supposed to find their way back to one another._

_Both of them were losing themselves before the search even began._

//

I found myself parked in front of a large building with a hockey mural painted along the side of the building.

I could still remember the hurtful words I had said to her so many years ago. It wasn't right of me but I was lost in the moment and I was angry. Nothing was working out the way it should've and it was frustrating me.

So I did go see Ashley in B.C. I applied to University of Victoria and they accepted me with a full ride. I felt bad that it all seemed so easy for me to get to Ashley when Spencer wasn't really given the chance to.

When I had told Spencer that I was moving in with her ex, she pretty much disowned me. I wasn't sure if it was because I actually left her or if she was jealous. She had nothing to be jealous over; Ashley had pictures of Spencer everywhere. Ashley was under the impression that Spencer and I weren't on speaking terms due to her stubbornness, but I never told her what was said exactly and _why_.

I felt for keeping such a huge secret - the fact that the love of her life had given birth to Lucas Evelyn Carlin. I tried to tell myself it was for the best and that it wasn't for me to say anything. I was tired of getting in between the two so I decided to keep my mouth shut regarding it all.

"You look a little lost." I heard a voice say from behind me and I turned around, smiling at the redhead who stood in the parking lot.

"Hey Ryn," I gave her a small hug.

"It's not everyday we get to see a celebrity in our neck of the woods," Ryn smiled and stepped back, "nice to see you again, Alex."

I was introduced to Ryn over three years ago and even though I didn't know her as well as Spencer did, she was still considered a good friend. "You too, you look great!"

"Ah," she shrugged and adjusted her bag on her shoulder, "I'm just heading into the Rec Centre for a swim, got your suit?"

"Uh no," I laughed, "I was just going to see if Spencer was here."

Ryn shook her head. "Nope, she's at Rapture."

"Oh," I nodded and opened my car door, "thanks, Ryn."

"You sticking around?"

"For a bit." I nodded and we said our byes before I sighed and sat back in my seat. I closed my eyes and smiled instantly the moment I heard the familiar ring tone. "Hey gorgeous," I said as I started to back out of my parking spot. "I miss you."

"_God, I miss you too,__"_ came the sultry reply, _"So, since you'__re taking a small break from touring and my team__'__s on a small holiday, I was wondering if you wanted some company?"_

I grinned and gripped the phone tighter in my hand. "Hell yea, I haven't seen you in two months. I'm a little deprived here, babe."

Her laugh was music to my ears. _"Alright then, I__'__ll catch a flight to Winnipeg, can you pick me up?"_

"I'm already on my way." I grinned.

"_Great, I'__ll probably catch the next available flight tomorrow. I__'__ll call you tonight with the time."_ She was smiling, I could hear her smile. _"I love you, Alex."_

I sighed and smiled even though she couldn't see me. "I can't wait to see you tomorrow." I whispered. "I love you too, Trace."

-\-/-


	5. The Carlin Family Way

**4 - The Carlin Family Way**

**Spencer's PoV**

"Is she nice?" Wind blew her soft curls around as we waited in the school yard for Lucas.

"Very." I smiled and took a sip of my coffee. I had allowed Dylan to shower quickly and gave her some of Lucas' old clothes to wear. She looked a little healthier with her hair shining in the sun and her face was rosier.

"What does she like to do?" Dylan asked, swinging her legs back and forth while we sat on the swings. She took a sip of her iced tea and smiled at me gratefully for the hundredth time that afternoon.

"Lucas loves to draw," I smiled as there were pictures everywhere in her room and on the fridge, "and she loves to play hockey."

"Hockey?" Dylan's eyes lit up and she jumped off her swing, looking at me with those huge brown eyes, "I love hockey!"

"You do?" I smirked and stood up as the school bell rang, indicating that school was now out for the day.

"I used to skate with my mommy all the time and she bought me a small net and stick. We'd watch hockey together almost all the time!" Dylan bounced up and down, holding her iced tea tightly against her chest.

"Well, then you and Luc will get along just fine." I smiled and wrapped my arm around her small shoulder.

"Mom!" Lucas came running up to us and stopped, tilting her head to the side while she looked over the smaller brunette. "Hi!" She smiled softly.

Dylan cleared her throat and shuffled closer to me. "Hi."

"Luc," I smiled and knelt down, "this is Dylan. She's going to be staying with us."

Lucas looked at me with some confusion before her eyes lit up. "Really?"

I nodded and smiled as Lucas grabbed Dylan's hand. "You are going to love living with us. My mom is pretty much cooler than all the other mom's here. She likes to watch movies with me and she even plays games. Oh and in the summer, we swim off our dock and she takes the boat out so we can go fishing, do you like to fish?"

I chuckled as I walked behind the two, holding hands. Dylan mentioned she never fished before and it made Lucas squeal; excited to show her new friend something different.

"So, who wants ice cream?" I smiled as we all settled into the Blazer.

"Me please!" Lucas smiled and I winked at her through the rear view mirror. "You want ice cream? We could go to Dairy Queen or go to Rapture. That's where my mom's best friends work. And my babysitter, she's awesome."

"We'll go to Rapture," I offered and started to make my way downtown.

//

Ephiny eyed me up suspiciously as she watched Lucas and Dylan read quietly in the corner. "How do you do it?" She whispered, wiping off a table. "Lucas is the most behaved little girl I know and then you go and get yourself another little girl who's just as polite?"

I smiled and shrugged, chewing on my toothpick. "Luck."

"Yea," she snorted and shook her head, "Jaiden was never that well behaved at that age."

"Oh come on," I chuckled, "Jaiden was the most well mannered ten year old when I moved back. You're just used to her rebellious teenage times now, that's all."

"Please knock some sense into that girl." Ephiny begged me.

"Hey," I held my hands up and smiled softly, "Jai takes really good care of Luc when she's watching her. Aside from the horror films she lets her watch," I chuckled, "but you've got nothing to worry about."

"Jaiden!" Lucas screamed excitedly and flew into the seventeen year old's arms.

"Ugh," Jaiden laughed and hugged the blonde. "Okay kid, I've got a bone to pick with you," she wagged her finger playfully, "you told your mother about our late night film festival."

"Sorry." Lucas shrugged. "You know I can't lie!"

I smirked. "I've taught her well." I winked and Jaiden rolled her eyes at me, grinning.

"And who is this cutie?" Jaiden looked at me as Dylan ran to my side, holding my hand. She bent down eye level with the girl and smiled. "I really like your bracelet." She pointed to the small black piece of jewellery that the little girl had refused to take off.

"Thanks," Dylan smiled shyly and held out her hand, "Dylan Avery."

Jaiden smiled and took the small hand. "Jaiden Wynters."

"Lucas Carlin." My daughter grinned and Dylan laughed with her.

"Well, since we've all been introduced, why not sit down and have something to eat." Chase came up behind her wife, wrapping her arms around her waist.

"What did I tell you about that PDA?" Jaiden stood up and scowled at her parents. "You ruin my rep!"

"Rep?" I raised an eyebrow. "You were the one caught making out with Jyll last week right across the street."

"Not that kind of PDA!" Jaiden smirked. "Parent Display of Affection."

"Oh." I nodded slowly and rolled my eyes.

"Whatever," Jaiden waved her hand and looked down at Dylan, "if you ever want cool people to hang out with, you just look me up, kid." She winked and walked towards the back, disappearing out of sight.

"I like her." Dylan grinned and looked around everywhere. "I like it here."

"Good," Lucas smiled and grabbed the smaller hand next to hers, "because we like you too, right mom?"

"Right." I nodded and shared a small smile with Chase and Ephiny.

//

"Wynters! Pick it up!" I hollered over my clipboard and paced the rink as my team fought for the puck. It was only practice but it was still crucial to make sure you were playing your best. I blew my whistle and the team came skating towards me. "Okay, that's it for the day, Wynters please make sure you're always on the defence."

"Got it Coach." Jaiden nodded out of breath and took off her helmet. "If you need to go 'back to the office tonight', I can take care of the girls at the café." She offered quietly.

"That won't be necessary," I smiled and padded her sweaty head, "it's Dylan's first night with us, I don't think I'll need you for a while."

"You sure?" Jaiden grinned, raising a perfectly sculpted dark eyebrow. "I know your 'office visits' are quite the uh, activity."

"Jai," I warned lightly and pulled her aside, "look, you and your parents are the only ones that know about my 'office visits', please keep your voice down."

"Okay, but I don't understand why you and Aimee hide your relationship," she shrugged, "it's not like you're in the closet."

"We're not in a relationship," I said and gathered up the spare pucks and watched as Dylan and Lucas ran onto the ice to help clear off the cones, "we're just having fun. I'm not looking for a relationship and neither is she."

"Cool," Jaiden shrugged and smiled softly, "well she's hot so, yea, I'd tap that."

"Wynters, go shower." I pushed her towards the locker room and she just snickered and walked away.

Aimee Smith and I met a few months back at the pool. She was introduced to us by Ryn and even though we hit it off right away, we both decided that a relationship wasn't what we needed at the moment. She had just gotten out of a five year marriage and wanted to have a bit of fun, and well, I didn't exactly complain.

"Mom, when is it my practice time?" Lucas slid on her feet and stopped like a pro in front of me.

"Next, once the older girls are out of the locker room, I want you to go get ready." I smiled and knelt down to Dylan's eye level. "Would you like to stay with me or go with Luc?"

"Luc." Dylan didn't even hesitate on the answer. She smiled and patted my cheek as she took off behind my daughter and continued to pile up the cones.

"See you Coach!" Jaiden smiled as she squealed when Jyll came up to her and twirled her around. Once the rest of the older team finished up, Lucas eagerly grabbed Dylan's hand and grabbed her to get into her gear.

"Coach Carlin, what a surprise."

I spun around fast and dropped my clipboard, looking into familiar grey eyes. Eyes that I haven't seen in over a year.

"What? Are you going to stare at me like that all evening?" Alex smarted off and took off her sunglasses. "Give lil sis some love, woman!"

I smiled and hugged her, squeezing her. God, I missed her. "What the hell brings a big rock star like you, here?"

"Can't I visit my sister and niece?" Alex grinned and licked her lips. "It feels weird being in an arena."

I raised an eyebrow. "Really? Aren't you kind of engaged to a hockey player?" I chuckled and she grinned goofily.

"Yea, but still, I haven't seen Tracey in two months and the times we do see each other, we're kind of in a bed." She shrugged.

"Huh," I smirked and pulled her back into a hug, breathing in deeply, "I've missed you."

Alex pulled back and cupped my face, "I've missed you too. I'm sorry I didn't call before coming here."

"Please," I laughed and smiled as parents started to bring in their children for practice, "you don't need an invite."

"Auntie Alex?!" Lucas came out in her gear and smiled big as she hugged my sister. "Sing!"

Alex laughed and shook her head. "Maybe some other time. Wow," she looked over the smaller blonde and then looked back at me, "you look just like your mother, only cuter."

"Auntie." Lucas laughed and pointed to Dylan. "Hey! This is Dylan Avery! Mom and I are gonna keep her."

I tilted my head slightly as Dylan frowned for the first time, her eyebrows furrowing in a soft confused look.

At that same moment I noticed the same look pass over Alex' face and it was my turn to frown in confusion. Finally, my sister stepped forward and smiled at the tiny brunette, "well then, welcome to the family."

-\-/-


	6. Remembering A Stranger

**Flashbacks are in **_italics._

**5 - Remembering ****A Stranger**

**Alex's PoV**

"Leigh Avery." Spencer tossed the file back on her bed. "I've searched for a Leigh Avery and all I'm getting are articles from her accident and drug possession charges."

"Why are you freaking?" I asked, taking a seat on the bed next to her.

"Because," Spencer sighed and closed her eyes, "did you see how quick Lucas and Dylan became friends? It didn't even take a minute."

"And?" I smiled and patted my sister's hand.

"What if I only have Dylan for a month? What if her mother clears through court and takes her away?"

"Then we'll congratulate her." I whispered. "Come on, she's been here a week. I think you should stop worrying about it before both her and Luc catch on."

"You're right." She placed the file back in her briefcase and took off her glasses, placing them delicately on her nightstand. "So," she smiled at me, "can I ask you a question?"

"Anything." I grinned and she moved over to grab something from a book shelf. She threw a CD case at me and I looked at the very first album I made before she threw me a second one.

"Why'd she stop?" Spencer asked, flipping open the small booklet, reading the small text.

"Who?" I played dumb.

"Alex," she warned me but I wasn't giving in. I wanted to hear her name fall from her lips. I don't think Spencer's mentioned Ashley's name in years. It was always 'she' or 'her'. I raised an eyebrow and pretended I had no clue who she was talking about.

"You know _who_," Spencer whispered and blinked, her eyes skimming over the picture of Ashley in the second album. It was a candid one from the studio when we were recording. Ashley was background vocals for some songs but refused to sing on stage during concerts.

"Who?" I pressed again.

"Ashley." The name fall from her lips as if it were the most sacred name known to man. Her eyes looked over me and her lip twitched slightly. "Happy?"

"Am." I grinned and picked up the booklet she dropped. "She had some issues," I looked away, "I guess she needed to figure out her life more and gave me full reign on the next albums."

"When did you see her last?" Spencer brought up Ashley for the first time since my career started to pick up. We reconciled after three and half years of not speaking to each other. By that time she had a two year old Lucas running around and I felt bad for not being there for her when my niece was born. Even Glen was there at the time Lucas was brought into this world.

"About a year ago," I licked my lips, clearly lying through my teeth, "I went to see her after I saw you and Luc last Christmas."

"How uh, how was she?" Spencer bit her lip and looked at me sadly. She no longer held a hatred feeling towards her ex-girlfriend. She missed her, I could tell but she refused to admit it or even say her name.

"She's been better," I shrugged and stood up, patting her leg, "Dylan's first day at school tomorrow. I should let you get your sleep."

Spencer nodded and smiled. "How long are you here for, Alex?"

I smiled and tapped my fingers on the door frame, "for however long you want me."

//

_I sat down next to her on the stage and swung my feet back and forth. Our pinkies linked and she nudged me on the shoulder with her own. "That was a really great show, Alexis."_

_I blushed and put my head down. I had just done my first sold out concert ever and I was ecstatic. "Thank you."_

"_You and Ash have created something really amazing," she turned to look at me and cupped my cheek, "you'__re going to be a star."_

"_Sam," I grinned and leaned into her touch. "__Thank you for taking time out of your studies to see me."_

"_Are you kidding me?" Sammy grinned and looked around the huge stage area, "and miss this?"_

"_I know things have been tense between us with this long distance thing," I finally breathed and looked in her blue eyes, finding some sort of sadness there, "it sucks that things aren'__t like they used to be."_

"_Hey," she smiled softly and pressed a soft kiss to my cheek, "we'__ve been together for four years, and we__'__ve been separated for three, yet here we are," she squeezed my hand, "together."_

_I nodded and smiled, jumping off the stage. "This is crazy! Who would of thought that I__'__d be here, singing on stage to a sold out crowd?"_

_Sammy smirked and slid off the stage, tucking some hair behind my ear. "I did. Ashley did," her eyes caught mine, "Spencer did."_

"_Right," I rolled my eyes and glanced around to make sure Ashley wasn'__t around, "have you spoken to her?"_

_Sammy nodded and swallowed. "I think you should call her Alex, she misses you. She tried calling your cell a few times within the past two weeks and you__'__ve had your phone off."_

"_I lost it." I shrugged and held up my new phone. "Is she okay?"_

_Sammy sighed heavily and nodded. "Yea, just call her, okay?"_

"_Is she really okay?"_

"_She busted her knee in a game," Sammy looked at me and shook her head, "It'__s all over the sport magazines, I__'__m shocked you haven__'__t been keeping up to date with them."_

"_I'__ve been busy." _

"_Still," Sam frowned, "she'__s back in Midtown for the summer, spending time with Lucas and your parents. She__'__s pretty torn up about her hockey career coming to an abrupt end."_

"_Oh." I frowned and took a deep breath, "I'__ll call her."_

"_Promise?" Sammy raised an eyebrow. She was always there, patching things up when life turned rough. _

"_I promise."_

"_Besides," she laced her fingers with mine, "I think it'__s time you should go home for a bit and meet your niece. Fuck, she__'__s a cutie," she blinked and smiled, "she has grey eyes, just like you."_

_I couldn__'__t help but smile. "Okay," I nodded, "I think on my next break I__'__ll go and see her."_

//

Early morning sunrise and I groaned, trying to curse whoever it was that invented the sun. "Alex," I heard a whisper in my ear and smiled, turning my head to face her brown eyes and freckled face, "hey." She grinned sheepishly.

"Hey you," I sat up and tilted my head as Dylan sat at the end of the bed, playing with her pyjama bottom string. "Are you okay?"

Dylan nodded and crawled up and tucked herself under the covers, her face buried into the pillow. "I couldn't sleep."

I brushed some hair away from her eyes and wondered what the girl had been through for the past two years with other families and not having her mother around. "Go to sleep." I whispered.

"You won't leave me?" Dylan asked with some desperation in her voice and I shook my head.

"No, I won't." I whispered and felt bad that Spencer wasn't even home at that moment. She had to get up extra early to Coach the 'Rapture Ravens' in an early morning practice.

"Spencer wasn't in her bed." She snuggled closer. "I had a nightmare."

I wrapped my arm around the small body and sighed. "No worries, I'm here now."

"Alex?" She lifted her head and blinked sleepily. I looked at her in silence and she bit her lip. "How come I've seen you before?" She whispered.

"Maybe you've seen my face on magazines." I teased, hurting at the same time that I lied to her.

"No," she yawned and licked her lips, "I think I know you from somewhere else."

My heart hammered in my chest but before I could say anything, I heard her breathing even out and I knew she was sleeping peacefully.

I laid in bed and thought about the tangled webs I allowed myself to get into. Over the past twelve years I had found out that I could hold the deepest secrets and take them to my grave if need be.

But the secrets I was holding on to were quickly showing signs of becoming unravelled and I had no way out of them.

"Leigh, you better be prepared for this." I whispered before closing my eyes.

Just when you thought the madness and drama was over...

...it snuck up on you – at least that this time around, it was more welcoming.

At least I thought so.

-\-/-


	7. The Woman Who Struggles

**Flashbacks are in **_italics_

_This flashback was taken from:_

_**Wash It All Away – Chapter 44.3: **_**I Was Lost But Now I Am Found**

**6****.1 - The Woman Who Struggles**

**Ashley's PoV**

"_That was delicious." I thanked her again for the food and leaned forward, brushing a strand of golden hair away from her eyes. "I don't know how it's possible," I whispered, my fingers guiding down her cheek softly, "but I fall in love with you more and more each day."_

__

Spencer grinned and wrapped her fingers around my wrist and pulled my fingers to her lips, where she brushed her lips over the soft pads of my skin. "Come with me," she stood up and gently helped me out of my seat, pulling me to my feet. "See, I can get pretty corny as well," she led me to a part of the arena where there was a stereo hooked up and pushed play on the CD, "Miss Davies," she held out her hand, "may I have this dance?"

The familiar smooth voice of John Mayer came on and I grabbed Spencer's hands, placing them on my waist while I wrapped mine around her waist.

_**Here comes the cold  
Break out the winter clothes  
And find a love to call your own  
You - enter you  
Your cheeks a shade of pink  
And the rest of you in powder blue**_

__

I watched as Spencer's lips moved to the lyrics of 'St. Patrick's Day' and I danced slowly, mesmerized by the talent that came from her throat and how she felt so comfortable.

_**Who knows what will be  
But I'll make you this guarantee**_

_**No way November will see our goodbye  
When it comes to December it's obvious why  
No one wants to be alone at Christmas time**_

__

I sighed with a smile and meld my body into hers, placing my head on her shoulder with my eyes closed, listening to every word she was singing in my ear, filling with more love I thought possible.

_**In the dark, on the phone  
You tell me the names of your brothers  
And your favorite colors  
I'm learning you  
And when it snows again  
We'll take a walk outside  
And search the sky  
Like children do**_

_**No way November will see our goodbye  
When it comes to December it's obvious why  
No one wants to be alone at Christmas time  
And come January we're frozen inside  
Making new resolutions a hundred times  
February, won't you be my valentine?**_

__

I lifted my head and looked into her blue eyes. Blue eyes that I so easily got lost in. The words faded from her lips when I tangled my hands in her hair, pulling her lips to mine. I breathed her in. Every essence of her beautiful heart and kissed her with every emotion I was feeling.

We stayed like that for a while on the ice, dancing and kissing with no one watching us. It reminded me of the night she took me to the pond.

This Spencer showed me her whole soul. She let down that aggressive part of her and let me in completely. She trusted me with every fibre of her being and I knew that because I could feel it and see it.

I hoped that I could really show her all of me in that same way. Swaying with her on that ice that particular night, I knew I could. I knew I could trust myself and in turn, have her trust me with everything she held in her hand that was a possession of me.

I was finally finding myself, Ashley Davies, within a woman…

_…a woman who had awakened a part of me I never knew existed._

//

I was standing outside for the first time in months. Not because I couldn't go outside, I just didn't want to. But now I had no choice. I sat in the back of the cab and waved sadly to Karen, who told me I was going to be fine out in the real world. That I had healed and a reason to go on fighting life and living it.

I looked down at the framed picture in my hand and smiled softly. I was finally on my way towards her.

"Where to?" The driver asked me and I licked my lips. The freedom was a big deal.

"Red River Inn." I finally found my voice and leaned against the backseat of the cab. I hadn't heard from Alex in over a month and I couldn't help but wonder what exactly was going on.

I finally found myself standing alone in the smallest hotel room possible, wanting it that way. I saved a newspaper, hoping that I could find a small apartment while I waited patiently to leave this place. Not that I minded being in Thunder Bay, but it wasn't home.

I just wanted to go home.

I unpacked a few things I'd need and was happy they gave me back all my personal items. I took a picture out of my back pocket and placed it on the table by the bed, allowing my finger to linger on it for a few seconds before grabbing my key.

My bank account hadn't been frozen, thank the Lesbian God. I felt a twitch in my chest when I saw the balance present millions of dollars I had yet to touch. I didn't think the money was that important. I kept it there for future use.

The only purchase I made that day was a cell phone. I programmed numbers into it as soon as I got back and licked my lips, hitting 'send' on one in particular.

I listened to it ring a few times before someone picked up. _"Hello?"_

"Long time no talk, kid." I sighed and I heard a gasp on the other end.

"_Ashley?" _ Alex whispered for some reason and I heard some muffling before her voice returned to normal, _"Where are you calling from?"_

"Cell phone." I smiled and clutched the phone in my hand. "I haven't heard from you, I was getting antsy."

"_Oh I know,"_ Alex sighed and chuckled a bit, _"it's been hectic, you know? But um, Tracey and I have good news!"_

"Did she finally knock you up?" I laughed and she made a 'boo' sound.

"_Lame."_ She muttered with an amused voice. _"We're going to have an outside wedding this summer!"_

I still found it hard to believe that my lil Alex was going to get married. I really did. "I better be invited."

She snickered. _"Duh, of course! So we're going to have in this courtyard that is surrounded by tiger lilies. Trace wants to have some candles set up along the walk way and I think that'd be an awesome idea. I wonder how-"_

Sometimes if I closed my eyes while listening to her talk, I could see Spencer. They had similar voices and back in high school, I may have grown to learn the difference but it made me wonder what Spencer's voice sounded like now. "How is she?" I asked, cutting her off.

"_Who?"_ Alex's voice changed into a serious tone.

"Spencer." God it felt so good to hear her name fall from my lips.

"_Ash,"_ she drew out my name and sighed heavily, _"she's good. She uh, she's successful."_

"Yea?" I smiled, "doing what?"

"_Um,"_ I could tell she was trying to make up something and it made me think the worst.

"She's married." I guessed and looked out the small window.

"_No!"_ Alex said hurriedly. _"Spence isn't married. She has too much on her plate to get involved with anyone."_

"Oh." I frowned. "Does she know about me?"

"_She's asked about you."_ Alex confessed with a light tone. "_She asked when I saw you last and I told her over a year ago."_

"Alex!" I hissed. "Why did you lie?"

"_Omigod, what was I supposed to say? 'Yea, I visited her not too long ago.' And then she'd ask me where you were. 'Oh you know, in rehab.'"_ Alex scowled, _"that'd go over real smooth."_

"Do you think she hates me?"

"_No."_ Alex softened and laughed heartedly, _"but she did. She held a grudge for the longest time but she got over it."_

Over it.

Over me.

"Alex?" I was all of a sudden tired.

"_Hmm?"_ Alex hummed.

"How is she?" I asked again.

"_Perfect."_ Alex whispered, knowing exactly what I was talking about.

-\-/-

_A/N: Sorry for the confusion in this! I promise it'll tie together!_


	8. My Star

**Flashbacks are in **_italics_

_**I don't own SoN! Thank you all for the reviews, I love them and I heart you.**_

**6.2 - My Star**

**Ashley's PoV**

_I did it. I did something no one would've expected of me and I couldn't have felt happier with my choice. I was only twenty one and I finally got my hands on the millions that my parents had stashed away for me. I put all of it but at least thirty grand away so that I wouldn't spend it on anything._

"_Hey," Alex sat beside me on our deck and handed me a cold water, "you look lost in thought."_

"_I am." I smiled and shrugged, taking a sip from the bottle. "When you make a huge decision in your life that will change everything, do you ever feel overwhelmed?"_

"_Sometimes." Alex smiled and raised an eyebrow at me. "Why? What are you gonna change?"_

_I took a deep breath and handed her the folded piece of paper. She blinked and frowned before opening it up but stopped to look at me one more time. "What is this?"_

"_I went to the doctors, actually I've been doing this for months now but the results came back and," I swallowed, "I'm going to have a baby."_

_Alex stared at me, mouth open before her face went slightly red. "What?"_

"_Yea," I smiled and took the paper, "I'm pregnant."_

"_Oh fuck me." Alex sighed painfully and rubbed her temples. "Doesn't the term 'lesbian' mean you don't fucking sleep with men?!"_

_Whoa._

_Baby C was pissed._

"_Of course!" I sat up straight and frowned._

"_Well goddamn it!" She stood up and paced slightly. "Spencer slept with a guy and she's a 'lesbian', so what, is it a new fucking trend I'm not aware of?"_

"_Alex!" I grabbed her hand and pulled her down to sit in my lap, "Calm down, I didn't sleep with any guy. That's gross."_

_Alex shook her head and looked at me confused. "Wha?"_

"_Spencer…" I swallowed dryly._

"_I meant Aiden." She whispered quickly, looking away and I sighed somewhat with relief. "So, what?" She asked again, looking more confused then ever._

"_I went to the cryobank," I said softly, "I've thought about it for a while, you know? I want a family, someone I can take care of and share love with."_

"_But Ash," Alex frowned, "we have this whole career thing going, why now?"_

"_I won't let it ruin this," I said assuring her._

"_Well," she frowned and got off my lap to kneel and face me completely, "are you happy with this?"_

"_You know it." I gave popped a kiss on her forehead. "I'm going to be a mother." I patted my still flat stomach and Alex finally let out a grin. _

"_Wow, how do your parents feel about this?" _

"_I haven't told them yet, you're the only one that knows." I took another sip of my water. "Alex," I grabbed her chin, "I promise we're still going to get that record out and we're going to make history, you and me."_

_Alex nodded with a soft grin. "I know, I believe you."_

_I sighed and leaned back in my chair. "I've never felt so alive."_

//

That was a lie. I was alive once, when I was with my high school sweetheart - my ex-fiancée. As hard as it was to believe, there was not a day that went by without a thought of her that filtered through my head. I kicked myself so hard when I never followed her to Quebec City after graduation. I thought I was doing the right thing. I thought that when we finished following our own individual dreams, we'd somehow meet up in the middle and be _perfect_ once again.

The day I gave birth to my beautiful baby, I knew I had found some renewed hope.

//

"_Oh God, this cannot be happening!" I screamed and hurdled over in pain as another contraction occurred._

_Alex dropped the overnight bag and helped me into my mustang. "Shit Ash, you couldn't have waited until it stopped snowing?"_

"_Not my fault mother __**fucking**__ nature ordered snow today!" I screamed and Alex rolled her eyes, clearly she was used to my mood swings and didn't take anything I said, personally. "This baby isn't exactly giving me a choice either!" _

"_Calm down," Alex sighed and reversed the mustang before peeling out of the parking lot. "I'm glad we took a break on the studio time while she did," she breathed and smiled at me as she sped towards the hospital, "I'd hate to miss your son's birth."_

_I smiled as the contractions eased off a bit. "Me too," I grabbed her hand she offered and felt her squeeze it gently._

_Finally at the hospital, I was wheeled into the nearest room because the baby was not willing to wait another second. It was probably the fastest birth in history but it hurt like a bitch._

"_One more push, one more push!" Alex screamed, squeezing my hand harder than I was squeezing hers. _

"_That's it Miss Davies," Dr. Nolte grabbed a tool and told me to push one more time. The cries of a baby flowed through the room and my heart swelled ten fold. I watched in wonder through tired eyes, the nurses wiping off the new bundle of joy. "Say hello to your daughter."_

_**Daughter?**_

"_You said I was going to have a boy?" I breathed but couldn't help but smile at the barely opened brown eyes in my arms. "Hey you," I cooed through happy and ecstatic tears._

"_I'm going to guess a leg got in the way," Dr. Nolte apologized with a soft smile as he checked my blood pressure, "I hope you didn't just focus on boy names."_

_I stared at the soft cheeks and the small nose on the face of my daughter. "I think," I whispered, "Dylan's going to be just fine."_

"_Dylan?" Alex whispered in awe, leaning down to coo softly. "That's sweet of you."_

_I smiled and shrugged. "Dylan Marie Davies." I nodded firmly and reached out to grab Alex's hand. She had been with me the very minute I told her about the pregnancy. She stuck by my side whether I was a complete bitch or going through some hormonal imbalance. _

"_Welcome to the world, Dylan Marie Davies." Alex cried happily and kissed the small baby on the forehead._

"_Welcome to the world, baby girl." I whispered and started to hum softly as I rocked back and forth gently._

_A new star was born._

_My star._

-\-/-

_**I know this chapter was hella short, so if I find time later, I'll post another one before this evening.**_


	9. Two Hot Blondes With Benefits

_**I don't own SoN!**_

**7.1 - Two Hot Blondes With Benefits**

**Spencer's PoV**

It was moments like that when I felt everything else in the world disappear. Her hair was silky, falling between my fingers and her lips were the smoothest I have felt in a long time. Her own fingertips dug into my hips as I pushed her harder against the wall.

"God I can do this all night with you," she groaned when I nipped my way down her neck and back up to her sweet mouth.

"I can't have you staying." I pulled back from her lips as she gave me a confused look.

"I thought you said your sister had the girls for the night?" Aimee frowned and tucked hair behind her ear.

"Alex and Tracey have to be up early to catch a flight to Ottawa," I shook my head, "they're bringing the girls back here when the movie is over."

"Well shit Spence," she groaned and pushed herself away from the wall, buttoning her shirt back up, "here I thought we were going to have the whole night."

I tilted my head to the side. "Since when do we do all nighters?"

"I figured that's what you meant when you said you had the house to yourself!" She argued back and threw herself in the recliner.

"That would make this," I pointed between us, "a relationship and way too complicated."

Aimee shrugged and looked up at me with her green eyes. "I guess."

"We agreed…" I stressed and she stood up quickly, nodding her head.

"I know." She sighed and rubbed her forehead.

"Sleepovers are not something we do," I stressed again, "I can't have you in my bed in the morning and have the girls find you there. Luc would be asking so many questions."

"Don't you think I know that?" Aimee laughed and rubbed her hands together. "It's just since Dylan moved in with you, I never get to see you anymore."

It was my turn to sigh as I sat down on the couch, playing with the fabric. "I'm sure you have other women you court around." I said softly.

"Does that make you jealous?" Aimee asked, raising her eyebrow.

"No," I shook my head and leaned forward, "I'm just saying that you couldn't have missed me that much."

"Well I did." She nodded her head firmly and glanced at the clock. "I should get going. If you don't want anyone to know about us then it'd be best if I skidaddle before the family comes home." Aimee grabbed her coat and keys from the vanity and turned to face me.

"Aimee," I lifted her chin up and pressed a soft kiss against her cheek, lingering for a few seconds, "they won't be back for at least another hour." I didn't wait for her reaction before trapping her in-between myself and the hallway wall, my lips hard on hers. She let out a sexy growl and arched her body into mine. "Bedroom." I whispered against her lips and pulled back.

Her green eyes clouded over as she licked her lips. "Lead the way." She whispered huskily and took my hand as she followed me towards the bedroom.

//

I heard the door open and close, groaning as the aching muscles in my back pulled. I blinked and found the one side of my bed empty. Sitting up, I looked at the clock and realized it was just after three in the morning. "Shit." I muttered, cursing inside as well at the fact that I had allowed myself to fall asleep with Aimee beside me. "Shit." I muttered again, knowing that there was a slight chance Lucas or Dylan could've seen me.

The lights turned on in the room and there stood Alex with a smug smirk on her face. "Who the hell was _that_ blonde bombshell?"

"Alex," I groaned, "not now."

"Seriously," she pushed forward and sat at the end of the bed, "who was that? I never knew you had a woman!"

"That's because I don't." I reached over the bed with the sheet wrapped around my body and grabbed my shirt, tugging it on before grabbed a pair of pants that were tossed at the side.

"Really?" Alex rolled her eyes. "She snuck out with a shirt that wasn't buttoned up and her jeans were still practically around her ankles."

"We fell asleep." I shrugged, trying to seem like it didn't bother me. "And anyway, shouldn't you be in bed with your woman because of the early flight you have?"

"Meh," she smiled and nodded towards the pillow beside me, "so really, who is she?"

"A stress reliever." I smirked and winked. "I scratch her back, she scratches mine – literally."

"Ew." Alex shot up and laughed quietly. "So she's not a girlfriend?"

"I haven't had a girlfriend since Katie," I scratched the back of my neck, "you know, the hot brunette figure skater?"

"I remember," Alex nodded and smiled softly, "she was sweet."

"Too bad that one never worked out." I shrugged.

"That was over four years ago." Alex frowned and scratched her head. "How long have you been seeing blondie?"

"A couple of months," I whispered.

"A couple of months and I never even knew about her until now?" Alex gasped as she gave me this 'I can't believe you' look.

"Because we're not together." I frowned. "No one knows… except Jaiden and her parents."

"Spence!" My sister shook her head and laughed slightly. "I can't believe you of all people are doing the whole 'friends with benefits' thing with that wicked hot blonde – and not telling me about it!"

"Can we please leave that one alone?" I raised an eyebrow and she nodded, sulking slightly. "And her name is Aimee."

"Ohh," my sister chuckled, "so you actually know her name."

"Funny." I deadpanned and grabbed Alex by the shoulders. "Now get out of my room before you wake up the girls."

"Me?" She hissed. "You're just lucky I poked my head in earlier before those two did. A half naked woman sprawled out against your blankets…"

"Out." I shoved her out the door and quietly shut it, leaning against it. Sometimes it felt the little sister in her never really grew up. I found it rather adorable yet annoying at the same time.

-\-/-


	10. And She Returns

**Flashbacks are in **_italics_

**Spencer's PoV**

**7.2 - And She Returns**

"_Mommy booboo?" Lucas frowned and pointed to the bandage wrapped around my knee. Her grey eyes lit up a whole room and though I was depressed about my career coming to an end, I felt rather blessed at having more time to spend with my daughter._

"_I'll be okay baby," I smiled and kissed her on the forehead._

"_Wuc Wuc!" Anton came barrelling out of the kitchen and grabbed Lucas' hand. "Pway!"_

"_Wow," I grinned as Kyla sat down a tray of crackers and cheese, Aiden bringing the Iced Tea right behind her, "He's a little rowdy this morning, isn't he?"_

"_Always." Aiden smirked and patted my good leg. "So listen, Kyla and I are thinking of having the wedding here, what do you think?"_

"_My parents place?" I raised an eyebrow. "Isn't it kind of small?"_

"_God no," Kyla laughed, "Anton! Do not play on the stairs, how many times do I have to tell you!" _

"_Sowwy momma!" Anton quickly apologized to his mother and grabbed Lucas' hand, pulling her away from the stairs. They sat down on the play mat and started to build things with blocks._

"_We have a small guest list," Kyla continued the conversation without missing a beat, "we'd have it at his parents' place but they chose that date to renovate it."_

"_They offered to lend it out afterwards," Aiden shrugged, "but we've already booked things in advance and some places have fees for cancellation." _

"_Plus we want to get married sooner, right hon?" Kyla smiled and kissed Aiden's cheek._

"_Well it's about damn time," I mumbled with a grin, "I'm surprised you never pulled a Naley and eloped."_

"_Please, as romantic as that was," Kyla smirked, "we have more class."_

"_You're going to have the wedding here," I frowned slightly, "who's on the guest list?"_

_I bit the inside of my cheek at the mention of a few family members from Aiden's side. When I thought of my male best friend, I thought of Kyla. A few years ago when I thought of my male best friend, I thought of his gorgeous brunette __**cousin**__. _

"_Your parents, Glen and his girlfriend, Aiden's parents of course," Kyla tapped her lips, "Alex and Sammy."_

"_Alex?" I swallowed. _

"_Yea," Kyla nodded, "your mom said she gave her the invite. Look," she sighed, "I know that you two aren't exactly on speaking terms but Alex is a part this family too and despite how we used to treat her growing up, she's still like my little sister."_

_I nodded. "I know."_

"_The invitation didn't get extended if that's what you're worried about," Aiden offered quietly, "she's not coming."_

_She as in Ashley._

"_You guys," I sighed heavily, "if you want her here, that's okay." _

"_I don't." Aiden frowned. _

"_But she's your cousin." I frowned in confusion._

"_And you're our best friend, Spence." He continued on. "I know I was a bastard in school towards you two. I felt betrayed by __**her**__, not you. Then I realized I was being the same person she was. But she stole your heart and you were happy and somewhere down the line she threw it back and broke you."_

"_Aid," I groaned and rubbed my forehead, "holding a grudge is a little petty after four years, don't you think?"_

"_Maybe," Kyla pushed and grabbed my hand, "but still, we could admit at being a little selfish and say the other reason she's not coming is because we want it drama free."_

"_Drama? What is life without drama?" We all whipped around to see Alex standing in the doorway. Her long black hair flowed just below her ribs and she was a lot taller than I remembered. Damn, three and half years of not seeing your own sister could really change your perspective on things._

"_Alex!" Kyla was the first one to run and hug her. "I thought you weren't flying in until next week?"_

"_I wasn't going too," her eyes never left mine, "but I think it was time."_

_I blinked and frowned as she put down her bags and stepped closer. She looked sad and guilty. I wanted to hate her still. I wanted her to know that the words she said to me last were more than painful but I couldn't. She was my little sister and as much as she pissed me off, she was Alex. _

"_Spencer," my name fell from her lips and tears began to spill, "I'm so so sorry." She cried and dropped to her knees, her head in my lap._

_I swallowed and watched as Kyla and Aiden ushered the kids into the kitchen. _

"_I know you probably hate me-" Her grey eyes were blurred through tears and I instantly wiped them away._

"_Hate you?" I frowned and shook my head. "Alex, I don't hate you."_

"_I left you. I said horrible things that I can't take back!" _

"_You're right," I licked my lips and cupped her thinner face, "you said things that cut deep but it's over now."_

_I wanted to show that I could be the bigger person and just allow time to move forward. Dwelling in the past was stupid and made no room for making things better. I wanted to show her that I knew that. That it was how I felt._

"_I've missed you." Alex whimpered and stood up, "and why did you go and do that to yourself?"_

_I chuckled through my own tears and grabbed my crutches, hoisting myself up. "Things got a little too rough."_

"_Things are never too rough for you." Alex smiled and wiped my own straying tears away. _

"_God look at you," I whispered in awe, "you've grown up a lot."_

"_I'm hot." Alex shrugged and smirked. "I know, I've lived with Ash-"_

"_Yeah." I cut her off with a weak smile. I wanted to ask her how __**she**__ was doing. I wanted know, really, I did. But I couldn't bring myself around to asking. _

_Not yet anyway._

"_Mommy?" Lucas came into the room quietly, her grey eyes questioning the 'stranger' standing in front of me._

_Alex gasped and held a hand over her mouth before looking at me. "Is this…?"_

"_Lucas," I sat back down and pulled my three year old on my lap carefully, "this is my sister, your Auntie Alex."_

"_Oh you're beautiful." Alex got back down on her knees and inspected the tiny blonde._

"_You dot dwey eyes." Lucas murmured and pointed to her own. "Me too."_

"_Yea," Alex whispered in awe, "oh God Spencer, I'm so sorry for not being here."_

_I just shook my head and watched as Lucas crawled out of my lap and into Alex's, studying her face. _

//

Sometimes it was easier to just forgive then relive.

-\-/-


	11. A Cry That Cannot Be Heard

**Catching you up to speed.**

So it seems as though some of you are getting a little confused with this story with the flashbacks and whatnot, some may ask how I even manage to keep track of it all!

_1. Spencer moved to Kenora, Ontario not too long after her hockey accident. She wanted to start fresh with her daughter and Arthur, the good man that he is, helped out with another dream of hers – starting a centre for children who have no home, live in bad environments or need counselling of any sort. Kenora was the only place she could think of that would make her extremely happy and close to the one person she "could never" have again._

_2. Ashley and Alex were roommates since Alex graduated high school. They went to school together as well as started a whole new music career – making Alex Carlin a rock star. Success followed them for a while during their first two albums but Ashley decided that she wanted to do more for herself. Hence Dylan Marie Davies._

_3. Ashley had a horrific experience and it caused her to lose Dylan (which you will find out about here in this chapter), help seeks her and she's just now getting back on the right track to find her daughter._

_4. Leigh Avery is Ashley's alias. (As you find out in the NEXT chapter.) She changes her name for Dylan's benefit and her own._

_5. As for the doctor's messing up the sex of the baby, it's totally possible. It happened to my sister, they thought she was going to be a boy (my parents already had everything picked out) and it turns out she wasn't a boy at all. They went ahead and named her Robin anyway._

_6. Sammy and Alex's breakup will be noted here soon. I can't throw TOO much at you at once or else your heads will really be exploding! Let's just say they aren't exactly out of each other's lives just yet... (and note that soon you will also have Sammy's PoV thrown into the mix.)_

_7. Ashley and Spencer will reunite but please be patient, if I were to make them meet up now it'd really lose a lot of the cream filling of the story – but trust me, when they do, immediate _**SPASHLEY sexual-romance-longing charged vibes**_will fill your screen._

_8. I'm not going to do a timeline, but if you have any other questions to help you to understand, please don't be shy and ask me! I promise to answer as honestly as I can._

**Flashbacks are in **_italics_

**8 - A Cry That Cannot Be Heard**

**Ashley's PoV**

_I don't think I could feel my legs or any other body parts for that matter. I was glued to my seat with my mouth hung open and tears threatening to spill as the officer in front of me paced back and forth. I couldn't hear what he was saying, I tuned him out. My heart was beating wildly and I licked my lips, hoping to God that I could find myself again. "You're lying." I managed to whisper._

"_I'm sorry Miss, I wish I was." He knelt down and handed me a tissue._

_The officer placed a hand on my shoulder. "What happened?" I could barely get the words out._

"_Head on collision." He bit his lip and rubbed his hand through the hair before standing up. "We had a challenge getting a hold of you."_

"_When did this happen?" I stood up and clenched my fists tightly. "How long ago have they died?"_

"_Yesterday." Officer Lucky hung his head. "Miss Aver-"_

"_Davies." I snapped and buzzed passed him. "My parents died yesterday and you're just telling me this now?!"_

"_I'm sorry Miss but their daughter's name was Ashley Davies, it took us a while to find out that you changed your name." Officer Lucky offered calmly. _

"_Oh God," I sunk against the wall and tried to hold onto the door frame. _

"_We've identified them but we still need you to come down and verify." _

_I felt numb the whole way there. Seeing my parents on the slabs cold and pasty was more than enough to make me throw up on the floor. I blacked out once or twice. It couldn't be happening. I had just talked to my father from Switzerland and he said they were on their way back home to visit their granddaughter. _

_I ran out of the morgue and when I reached outside, I collapsed to the ground, wondering why life brought me here. I tried calling Alex but with her being on the road, I knew there was a chance she wouldn't answer her phone. I hadn't seen her since Dylan was four, letting her go out on her own for a while. I still worked behind the scenes but she took her career by the collar and steered it in her direction._

_The officers drove me home and I sat in house alone. I just sat there, chewing on my thumbnail and drinking a Bud slowly. The information was still sending me into shock mode. Dylan was going to be devastated when she found out. Her poor seven year old heart was going to shatter. _

_I threw the empty beer bottle in the sink and grabbed the keys to my mustang. I pocketed my cell phone after making a quick call to Dylan's friend's mother. She was at a birthday party but I needed to have her with me.  
_

_I arrived at the children's birthday party and took a deep breath before approaching the door. I could hear the laughter from seven and eight year olds coming from somewhere inside and rang the door bell._

"_Leigh!" Freddy, the father of the birthday girl, smiled. "You're an hour early to pick up Dylan."_

_I swallowed and nodded, trying to trust my voice. "I know, I called your wife to let her know I was on my way. Something came up…"_

"_Oh," he frowned in concern but nodded as if he understood the urgency, "okay, let me go grab Dylan and her treat bag."_

_I stood in the doorway quietly, thoughts running through my head yet feeling like I couldn't think at all._

"_Mommy!" Dylan smiled and I immediately bent down to hug her tiny frame, picking her up and nuzzling my face in her neck. "You're early."_

"_I know," I whispered and placed a kiss on her cheek, "did you eat yet?"_

_Dylan shook her head no and thanked Freddy for the treat bag while we made our way out the door. "Can you cook us something?" She smiled her toothy grin and it made me smile yet my heart shatter at the same time._

"_Anything you want baby girl." I squeezed her hand and placed her in the back seat, snapping her seatbelt on securely. _

"_How about macaroni and cheese!" She sang while I started the car and smiled through the review mirror as she started singing to the latest song on the radio._

"_Sounds good to me." I softly spoke before turning out onto the road and making my way back home._

"_Why am I going home early, mommy?" Her brown eyes oozed curiousity and I briefly closed my eyes before watching the road._

"_I have some news to tell you," I gripped the steering wheel. She was going to ask me questions until she got an answer but I didn't want to tell her about the passing of her grandparents when I couldn't be there to hold her._

"_Good news? Is Gramma and Grandpa coming home?" Dylan clapped her hands excitedly and that's when I lost all self control of my tears. _

_They flowed freely, obscuring my view and that's when I lost everything._

_I remembered hearing her scream and then the crunch. I coughed hard and felt someone pull me from the trapped mustang. "Dylan?!" I tried to scream but I choked on the smoke and dust._

"_Ma'am?" I looked up to see a paramedic hovering over me. "Dylan. Is that your daughter?" He asked calmly and I nodded._

"_Is she okay?" I panicked and tried to move but a sharp pain rang through my head. _

"_She's in the ambulance getting stitches but she'll be fine. Some of the pieces of the mailbox got her arm, they're just cleaning it out." He steadied me still._

"_Let go of me, I want to see my baby!" I screamed and broke free from his grasp, stumbling towards the ambulance that held my daughter. "Dylan?" _

"_You're bleeding!" She gasped and I realized the pain in my head was from a deep gash on my forehead. "Mommy, are you okay? I'm scared!" Her tears fell freely and I pressed a kiss to her forehead, trying to avoid the paramedics working on her stitches. She cried as I rocked her gently, stroking her hair._

"_Miss Avery?" A deep voice came from the door and I looked at the tall black man standing there with a badge. "Can we see you for a second?"_

_I nodded and promised Dylan I'd be back. "I love you, sweetheart." _

"_I love you too, mommy." Dylan sniffled as I made my way out of the ambulance, frowning at the scene of the crash. My mustang was smashed between a mailbox and a tree, the front of the vehicle trashed. _

"_Oh God," I whispered._

"_Miss Avery, have you been drinking?" The guy cut to the chase and I frowned, shaking my head. _

"_I had one a little while ago, not enough to react through my bloodstream!" I protested._

"_There are traces of alcohol in your breathalyser test," he tapped his badge against his hand. _

_Then why ask me if I was drinking if you already knew!_

_Fucker._

"_Look," I swallowed, "I just lost my parents yesterday and I could've lost my daughter today, can we do this some other time?"_

"_You have traces of alcohol in you. You had a child in your vehicle while running a red light and crashing, merely missing a couple of pedestrians in the mean time. I suggest you don't get cocky." He hissed and shook his head._

"_I was upset." I argued._

"_So you were upset when you took this drink?" _

_There was no use lying about it. Evidence was there and I watched CSI enough to know that the evidence doesn't lie. _

_I had just made the hugest mistake of my life by having that __**one**__ beer. Or maybe it was the fact that I drove to pick up my daughter while I was upset._

_Either way it cost me._

_Big._

-\-/-


	12. Changing For The Better

**Another A/N regarding Ashley's position in losing Dylan over one beer during the last chapter: **_**In reality, it happens. **__One of my friends got her child taken away under the same circumstances as Ashley - I based it on her events (after asking permission of course) and it really can take so much as drinking, only having one beer WITH a child in the presence. It's sad that it happens, but it does – in my area at least! I guess that's what irrational thinking does to you and who can blame Ashley, really. She just found out her parents were dead and she only had Dylan left for her, I'd probably be in the exact same position._

_**I don't own SoN.**_

**Flashbacks are in **_italics_

**9 - Changing For The Better**

**Alex's PoV**

"_Why Leigh Avery?" I scratched my head and bounced a two year old Dylan on my knee._

"_It's different yet I'm not straying too far." Ashley shrugged and put the pencil back in her mouth as she allowed her fingers dance along the keys and music flow through the studio. _

"_But why?" I asked again, playing with Dylan's curly hair. She looked back at me and gave me a toothless grin, squealing. She reminded me of my niece. I closed my eyes and tried to will the guilt away of not letting Ashley know about Lucas – or Spencer know about Dylan. "I just don't get why you are changing your name."_

"_I just want too," Ashley shrugged and looked up at me before leaning in and kissing Dylan on the cheek, taking her out of my arms, "credit on your album will still be in Ashley Davies," she said quietly, "but I just want to run for a bit yet not really go anywhere."_

"_What about Dylan?" I frowned._

"_She's still Dylan," Ashley smiled as Dylan's tiny hands found their way to the keys on the piano, "her last name will be Avery as well, that's all."_

_I still didn't understand it but Ashley always had a reason behind her decisions. She said my name and I looked at her, raising an eyebrow. "I'm still me. The only change is the name."_

"_Okay," I shrugged, "Leigh."_

"_Besides," Ashley whispered, "I don't really want her in the spotlight and keeping Ashley as an alias seems safer. Keeping Dylan away from the public will be easier on her growing up."_

_I guess I could understand that. "So what, are you just staying behind the scenes from here on out?"_

"_I think you can handle this," Ashley smiled and nuzzled her daughter's neck before setting her down. Both of us watched Dylan run to her toys and play by herself quietly. "I will still do the studio time and help you with your lyrics but I'm done with the publicity. I want Dylan to grow up to know her mother, not always be with her grandparents."_

_I nodded sadly and shrugged. "Well at least we have two successful records, right?"_

"_Yeah, duh." Ashley smiled again. "I told you we'd get it done," she turned to face me and bit her lip, "I think it's time I stop holding your hand, Alex. You rock the stage with your talent. Maybe my dream was to be a rock star like you once upon a time and creating it is an amazing feeling, but," she glanced over at the small brunette playing with large blocks, "she's what I'm more concerned about now." _

"_I know." I said softly and patted her hand. "So when I head out on tour next week, you're not coming with?"_

"_No," she whispered and looked at me, "but you'll be fine on your own. You have your groupies and your girlfriend."_

_I smiled and nodded, standing up. "I'm going to go for a walk, I'll be back in a bit." I moved to kiss Dylan on top of the head and grabbed my keys. _

"_Bye!" Dylan waved enthusiastically and I couldn't help but grin at her._

//

"Alex Carlin, may I have your autograph?" Jaiden smirked and sat down at the kitchen table, rubbing her eyes from sleep.

"Does that ever get old with you?" I asked, pouring her a cup of coffee and sliding it in front of her.

"Nah," she shrugged and took a sip, looking at me, "so where's your hot hockey playing fiancée?"

"Playing hockey." I smirked and pointed at her clothing. "Spent the night again?"

"Yea, Aimee and Spencer had a 'date' only it wasn't defined as a 'date'." Jaiden rolled her eyes and I couldn't help but chuckle. "What is it with those two anyway?"

"Just friends with benefits." I shrugged.

"That never works," the teen sighed and stretched, "I know."

"Is that what Jyll is?" I asked, raising an eyebrow.

"No, Jyll _was_ a friend with benefit. Now she's more than that." She shrugged and took another sip of her coffee.

"Auntie Alex," Lucas climbed up on the stool and smiled at me, "where is mom?"

"Oh," I frowned and looked at Jaiden for help.

"She had to run to the office this morning," Jaiden smiled and got up, grabbing a box of Frosted Flakes and a bowl for the smaller blonde, "she'll be back before lunch."

"Yeah." I said somewhat feeling stupid that even I couldn't think of a good excuse for my sister's absence.

"Morning!" Dylan came out wearing a pair of jeans and a small sweater, climbing up beside Lucas on the stool.

"Morning brat." Jaiden grinned and grabbed a second bowl. "How did you sleep?"

"Better." Dylan frowned slightly. "Lucas climbed into bed with me."

"I was worried about you." Lucas blushed and put her head down.

"Aww," Jaiden smiled and ruffled the small blonde's hair, "if you were seven years older kid, you'd so be my girlfriend."

Lucas blushed even deeper and I detected a small crush forming.

"Well," I cleared my throat and passed the teen the milk, "I'm going to shower. You three behave." I smirked and placed a kiss on Lucas' and Dylan's forehead.

"Where's my kiss?" Jaiden gasped and I shook my head, rolling my eyes as I exited the kitchen.

I heard a small kissing noise coming from the kitchen and then Jaiden, "Lucas Carlin! That was the best kiss anyone's ever given my forehead!" and then the three ladies from the kitchen burst into laughter.

Ashley would be happy to know that her daughter was now in good hands. Best hands.

Spencer Carlin's hands.

//

"_What is going on?" I blinked as I looked at a fragile Ashley, who was rocking back and forth while biting her thumbnail as she sat alone in her house. _

"_I lost her." Ashley croaked out and shook her head, staring at the wall in front of her. "I had one fucking beer and it cost me everything!" She all of a sudden threw a decorative plate against the wall and laughed as it shattered to the ground. She turned to look at me and bit her lip, "Dylan's gone and I tried to call you. I tried to get a hold of you and you were too fucking busy to even return a message."_

"_Ash," I frowned and she shoved me out of the way before kicking open Dylan's bedroom door open. Her closet was almost bare and I frowned, "where is she?"  
_

"_Gone!" The brunette screamed, tears running down her face. "Where were you, Alex? Too fucking busy to call me back? Too fucking busy flirting with your groupies? No wonder Sammy broke up with you."_

_I slapped her across the cheek and she stared at me, her hand holding the place where my own hand had made connection. "I'm sorry." I stuttered, amazed at my own actions._

"_Get out." Ashley whispered. "Get out right now, I don't fucking need you."_

"_I came as soon as I could! I got your message and came as soon as I could!" I pleaded and tried to grab her but she pushed me away._

"_Dylan's gone. Dylan's gone and I don't know how to get her back." Ashley cried, her whole frame sank forward as her body racked with uncontrollable tears. "She's my whole world, Alex."_

"_I know." I frowned and bit my lip, sighing as she let me run her back for comfort. "What happened?" I whispered._

"_My parents are dead." Ashley deadpanned and glared at me before casting her head down. _

"_What?!" I shrieked and shook my head. "No!"_

"_Yes!" She screamed hysterically. "I went to pick up Dylan from a birthday party and had one beer beforehand. She was in the car with me when she mentioned her grandparents and I couldn't handle it anymore. I cried and the tears that gathered up in my eyes caused me to run a red light and poof," she hoarsely whispered, "she's gone."_

_I stumbled back and sat down on the chair in the middle of the living room. "She's- she's gone?"_

"_They took her away from me. I wasn't a bad parent! I wasn't…" Ashley sobbed and fell over more. I couldn't help but fall to my knees and pull her into me, crying with her. My heart calmed slightly knowing that 'gone' never meant 'dead'._

_Ashley was by far the best mother I've known, aside from Spencer. She made sure Dylan was well taken care of. Made the brunette eat her vegetables, watched Barbie movies with her, read her bed time stories and helped with her homework. I hadn't seen Dylan since she was four but I was given school pictures that hung next to Lucas on my tour bus._

"_I'm sorry about your parents." I cried and her body shook harder. _

_It took a while to calm down Ashley and I finally got her settled down. I sat there in the dark, watching her restless body toss and turn. People thought that I was madly in love with that woman. I loved Ashley. She was my best friend but I wasn't in love with her. I regret the things I have done since high school and leaving Spencer behind was the biggest one. I knew that it made me a lousy sister but I was a Carlin and I was just as stubborn as the rest of my family. _

_Once I found out Ashley was pregnant, I couldn't just leave her. It felt good to know I was there for her. _

_I got up slowly and made my way towards the living room, picking up my cell phone. One phone call to my father and I told him the whole story. He was just as blown away as I expected and wrapped the fact that Ashley and Spencer both had daughters. What amazed him more was how I kept it all a secret._

_My dad had formulated a plan and told me to keep an eye on Ashley as much as I could. He dealt with those kinds of situations a lot and sometimes the parents end up falling over the deep end regardless if they were innocent the first time around or not._

_I crossed my fingers in hopes that my dad, the hero, could somehow find a way to get Dylan back safely to her mother. My only job was to keep things smooth for Ashley._

_I hoped I could do well enough._

-\-/-


	13. The Keeper Of Hearts

**Flashbacks are in **_italics_

The flashback was taken from **Wash It All Away: Chapter 50 – **_**Didn't You Get The Memo?**_

**10 - The Keepers Of Hearts**

**Spencer's PoV**

"Mom?" Lucas came walking out of the study room with a photo book in her hands. She sat on the couch beside me with a sleeping Dylan's head in my lap. "Are these yours?"

I smiled and took the book gently, tracing my fingers over the blue plaid pattern. "Yea, my pictures from when I was a teenager."

"Oh," she furrowed her brow and licked her lips before opening up the book. It had sat pretty on my shelf for years but I hadn't looked at it since Lucas was born. "Can I ask you a question?"

I nodded and turned down the volume slightly from the TV. "You can ask me anything."

Lucas nodded and flipped towards the back of the book where she landed on a few pictures from high school. "Who is she?" She whispered, her finger pointing to the brunette that held me close to her with our faces smiling brightly towards the camera.

"A, uh, a friend." I managed to say and shifted slightly, running my fingers through the soft curls in Dylan's hair.

Lucas asked, raising a curious eyebrow. "What happened to her?"

"Um," I frowned and swallowed, not really knowing what happened to Ashley after all the years that have passed by, "I really don't know, baby." I glanced at her grey eyes and she tilted her head and looked down at Dylan, "why?"

"Well you still talk with Auntie Kyla and Uncle Aiden… and you still see Aunt Carmen when she's not playing hockey, I was just wondering why you're still friends with them and not her?" She tapped the picture again, "you two looked close."

Lucas Carlin was smart. The smartest in her grade to be exact. I was a proud parent of course, but sometimes she was too smart for her own good.

"We were," I smiled at the memories, "Ashley and I were very close."

"That's her name?" Lucas softly smiled and then looked back over at Dylan and tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. "Mom?" she whispered, looking back up at me, "Dylan looks like her."

I think my mind went temporarily blank and the noise that was rushing through my ears was deafening. I frowned and looked down at the sleeping frame and curled my lips into a thin line. The resemblance had crossed my mind a few times but I couldn't truly believe that Ashley would allow her daughter to be in such a messed up system.

"Dylan Avery." I whispered and the name snapped together. Two middle names put together and I frowned even further, watching the small body shift and a yawn escape her mouth. I shook my head. It was just a coincidence.

It had to be.

Right?

The Ashley I knew would never ever sleep with a man and the Ashley I knew would never allow her own child to grow up in an unloved environment.

"She does." I looked at Lucas and kissed her forehead. "But how about we keep this book a secret, kay?"

Lucas nodded and closed it before hopping off the couch. "Mom?" She had a way of saying 'mom' that made me melt. "Do you think Dylan's a keeper?"

Fingers ran through soft brown curls again and then her brown eyes sleepily opened, her skin was the same colour as Lucas', a bronze colour. "Yeah," I whispered as the lazy eyes closed again and her body curled deeper onto my lap, "she's a keeper."

//

"_Hey," I leaned in and whispered in Ashley's ear, "you think she'll be that happy when we tell her you're knocked up?"_

I heard Raife laugh. I didn't realize he was still standing there.

"Planning on getting my little girl pregnant?" He chuckled at me.

"What if I already have?" I raised an eyebrow and smirked.

"I'd call you very special," Raife smiled. That was where Ashley got her gorgeous smile from. Good. I liked her father.

"I am very special," I smiled and looked at Ashley, squeezing her hand.

"I like you," he pointed a finger at me, "you're better than that last girlfriend of Ashley's, you know, that Beck chick? You're more talkative, more sure of yourself."

"Beth," Ashley rolled her eyes and sighed but still had a smile to her face. I could tell she was happy that her Dad approved of me, of us.

"Who's Beth?" Raife raised an eyebrow.

"You said Beck, my last girlfriend's name was Beth." Ashley said a little more serious that time.

"Um," I finally cleared my throat and smiled, "thank you."

"So how'd you manage to snag the girlfriend of that cousin of yours?" He walked around the table and put an arm around Ashley.

"I really don't know," her eyes locked with mine. "I guess it all just kind of happened."

"I kissed her," I added in, biting my upper lip as I glanced at the man briefly, "she was always there, looking so good and I couldn't take it anymore, so," I smiled, "I kissed her."

Raife got a smug look on his face. "You couldn't resist the Davies charm, could you?"

Ashley chuckled, "um, actually our charm pales in comparison to the Carlin charm," she cast me a heart warming smile, "trust me."

"Oh, I'm a believer," he patted Ashley on the shoulder and kissed the top of her head, "she's a keeper kiddo," I heard him whisper in her ear.

"Hear that Carlin?" Ashley pulled me forward when we were alone in the larger than large dining room, "you're a keeper."

"Mmm," I mumbled against her lips and cupped her face lovingly, "good."

Exactly how it should've been.

//

"Can I go play outside?" Dylan asked, throwing on a pair of rubber boots. "Lucas said she'd play with me after she's done her homework."

I smiled while I finished chopping up the rest of the vegetables for the stir-fry. "Are you done your homework?" I asked and she nodded eagerly.

"Want to see it? It's all done."

"I believe you." I smiled and she grabbed her raincoat. "Don't go getting dirty okay? We have guests coming over and I really don't think you wanna be stuck in the bath when they arrive."

Dylan shook her head and let out a small giggle. "And no going down by the docks, right?" She beamed proudly when I nodded my head. Before Dylan stepped out the door, she made a beeline towards me and kissed my cheek. "I love you, Spencer." She blushed before running out the door.

I swallowed hard and closed my eyes. No other child had that kind of affect on me. I've fostered a couple and not one gave me that comfort feeling. It was like she really was a keeper.

Three months of having Dylan at my place, in our home, was a blessing. She fit in just perfectly and her bond towards Alex was stronger than I would've imagined. Lucas was officially attached and the young brunette was her best friend. She'd beat up anyone who messed with her and I found it endearing, the two already considered each other sisters.

I knew it was a dangerous risk seeing as Lucas was non-stop about Dylan. She loved to make the younger girl smile and laugh.

"Knock knock!" Ryn came in carrying a bag. "Man it's wet out there!"

"I know." I smirked and looked at the window to see Dylan shoot a puck into the hockey net, screaming as if she won her own gold medal. "You're early."

"Oh Spence," she smirked, "you should know me by now, I'm always early!"

I nodded, it was true.

"What's with the extra food?" I scrunched my face up and looked at her.

"Well," she gave me a sly smirk and stepped aside to reveal a blonde standing next to her, "Aimee talks so much about you I figured it'd be great if we had one more guest!"

I cleared my throat as Aimee gave me a shy smile with the shrug of her shoulders. Ryn didn't know what we did behind her back. She was my best friend and had no clue that Aimee and I messed around – a lot.

"Well," I finally spoke and pointed to a stool, "come in."

"I'm just going to use the ladies room," Ryn winked and made her way down the hall.

"Sorry," Aimee whispered as she moved beside me, "Ryn said 'a friend's' house."

I nodded silently and moved away from the blonde, throwing the vegetables in the pan.

"Come on babe, don't be mad." She whispered, placing a kiss on my neck. Aimee jumped when I gently shoved her away. "What?"

"Not here, not now." I hissed and wiped my hands on a towel. I heard Lucas run out of her room and slide into the hallway closet. It happened a lot with the wooden floors but I think she just found it amusing. "Luc, I told you to be careful on the floors."

She giggled and shrugged, grabbing her rubber boots and raincoat. "Sorry mom."

"She's adorable." Aimee came up behind me and looked at my eleven year old.

Lucas raised her eyebrows and pointed to Aimee. "Who's the hottie?"

Oh, she definitely belonged in the Carlin gene pool.

"Manners." I frowned and she mumbled a sorry. "This is Aimee, she's a friend of Ryn's."

Lucas' eyes lit up. "Ryn's here?" The redhead was like a second mother to her.

"Right here kiddo!" Ryn smiled and hugged the smaller blonde.

"Wanna come out and watch Dyl and I play hockey? She's getting really good at the slap shots, last time she almost took out my eye!" Lucas tugged on Ryn's sleeve and they both made their way out of the house.

I turned to face Aimee and placed two fingers on her lips. "Even if we are alone, there will be no kissing or touching. No awkward silences and meaningful glances. You're here as Ryn's friend and I'm a mother who's looking out for her daughters."

It may have sounded harsh but it really wasn't. With Lucas' attachment issues I knew she could fall deeply for Aimee. It wasn't hard to do, she was gorgeous and kind.

But she wasn't _my_ type.

I was all about the fun.

"Okay." Was all Aimee said before brushing passed me and into the kitchen.

"Okay." I whispered and blew hair out of my eyes.

It'd definitely be an interesting night.

-\-/-


	14. Welcome Back Ashley Davies

**_A little angst in this but it'll tell you more about Ashley's past after losing Dylan... and the hero behind her rescue. Thank you all for reading and reviewing. I LOVE that my inbox is always full of alerts, makes me want to keep writing Spashley and never stop! You all rock. Hard core! Thanks! And I don't own SoN._**

**Flashbacks are in **_italics_

**11 - Welcome Back Ashley Davies**

**Ashley's PoV**

I stood before the court and was granted what I was waiting for, for so long.

A chance.

"Leigh Avery, your name has now been changed back to Ashley Davies. From here on out you'll be known as Ashley Davies and every charge that was made will not affect your current name." A well suited guy said in a formal tone before he took a seat and I was ushered out of the room and into a smaller room.

"Lei- Ashley," Carter, my lawyer, corrected himself, "we've located Dylan."

I sat upright in my seat and hung onto every word he was saying.

"She's about six hours west from here and she's in a foster home." He sighed and took up his glasses, rubbing his face. "You've still got one more date to go through in order to get your visitation rights it's going to take some work given your history."

I licked my lips. "But after that I can see her, right? I can go see my daughter?"

"Yeah," he smiled warmly and patted my hand, "but in the mean time, I suggest you go out and get yourself a job to keep your mind off of things. It's a good start that you finally got your apartment but it will show stronger character in you if you get a job and show you're working hard."

I nodded and pointed at him. "That is a very good idea."

"I know you have millions and though Dylan would be set financially but showing the drive, you have a better chance at a quicker hearing." Carter stood up and shook my hand. "I'll be in touch with the next court date and we'll assign you a case worker. It should only take a couple of weeks."

I nodded and gave him a warm smile. "Thank you Carter."

"Anytime Miss Davies." He bowed his head and slipped out the door.

I stretched and for the first time in a long time, a genuine smile graced my lips. I looked out the window on the cold October day and watched the rain pour down onto the road below.

"So, looks like you're doing real well."

I turned around and found Alex standing there with a smile on her face. I hadn't seen her since the last time while I was still in rehab. "You like to surprise me, don't you?"

Alex nodded and pulled back from our hug. "Tracey would've loved to be here but she has a game in Ottawa that she couldn't miss."

I nodded and squeezed her hand. "So how is the career coming?" I asked as she took a seat beside me.

"Not so much lately," Alex blushed and put her head down, "I requested time off but I am looking at dates again to see when I'll be restarting my tour."

"What about studio time?" I frowned. "You wanted to get your next album out by Christmas."

"I pushed it back for March," she shrugged and smiled softly, "don't worry about me Ash."

Alex could never call me Leigh. She said it felt weird but whenever she sent cards, she'd put Leigh for Dylan's sake.

"Dylan's in wonderful hands." Alex blinked and looked at me, reading my thoughts. "She's so grown up yet so tiny for her age."

"She's my princess." I smiled sadly and reached for the picture of her I carried around everywhere. "God Alex, I miss her so much."

"I know." Alex sighed and patted my hand. "But she's in one of the best homes ever."

"How does she look?" I asked, I couldn't believe that within the month I was going to be able to see my daughter.

"Well," the rock star grinned excitedly, "she has long hair like you, curly and wavy. She's a miniature Ashley that's for sure." She chuckled and looked out the window. "She's in fourth grade, Spenc- uh spending a lot of time in her books allowed her to skip a grade. I guess her other homes never allowed her in school."

I frowned and then fumed. "What?!"

"Um," Alex sighed and cleared her throat, "Dylan's been through a rough year and a half. In homes that didn't really want her, just the money."

"You said your father had it all figured out! You said she'd be safe!" I threw my chair back and bit my tongue hard, trying to get rid of the angry feeling.

"Look," Alex frowned and spun me around, "he may work in the system but sometimes he can't help it all! He tried his best when he could and it's not my fault so many places suck at giving families, children. My dad stuck his neck out for you and Dylan and all that matters now is that she really is in a good home."

I swallowed and squared my jaw, looking at her. "What are they like?" I asked cautiously. I never experienced being in Foster Care but I've heard horror stories about it. It shattered my heart to know that Dylan may have been a victim to those exact stories.

"Who?" Alex shook her head.

"The people taking care of Dylan, what are they like?" I watched as Alex opened her mouth then closed it quickly again before licking her lips.

"Well she's um, single? She works hard though and Dylan is definitely her number one priority." Alex squeaked and swallowed, glancing out the window once again. I frowned and chewed on my lip, taking a step towards her.

"She's good to my girl?" I asked again.

"Yes," Alex breathed and her grey eyes looked at me. "Dylan loves where she is at."

"She, she doesn't recognize you?" I raised an eyebrow.

"Yea, she does." Alex nodded with a hint of smile before she frowned. "She doesn't remember who I am, but she said she knew me from somewhere. I mean, it's been five years since she last seen me."

I nodded. "I know."

Alex had stopped coming around the moment I told her I was staying behind the scenes with her music. She told me it was because she didn't want to risk blowing my true identity. When I first changed my name, I still went to the studio but left Dylan with my parents. After coming home late some nights, I missed precious moments with her so I decided to pull out completely and just be a 'background assistant' or 'ghost writer'.

Baby C was a little upset when I disappeared from the publicity but she was also rather supportive in my decision.

"Next month I may be able to go see her. I'm trying to get some visitation rights and then when the court sees me fit, I'll be able to take Dylan home with me." I couldn't contain the happiness in my voice but I couldn't ignore the sad yet disappointed look on Alex's face either. "Alex, this is a good thing! I can finally be the mother I always was to Dylan."

"I know," she whispered and leaned forward on the table a little before looking her at me, "it's just that Dylan's gotten used to being where she is, you know? She's finally in a home that wants her. A home that loves her and lets her do all the crazy things little nine year olds do."

"But she's _my_ home." I frowned, creasing my eyebrows. It felt as if Alex was hiding something but I had no clue what it could've been. "She's _my_ daughter."

"I'm just saying," Alex shrugged, "I mean, I'm happy for you Ash, you know I am. After you told me about heavy drugs a year back, I was worried that you'd never admit to yourself that you could do better with your life and fight for Dylan. Now here you are, fresh out of rehab, sober, and-"

"-fighting to get my daughter back." I said sharply. For some reason I felt a little angry towards the young Carlin. She was holding up some resistance and after being her best friend, I knew she couldn't hide it well. There was a secret inside of her that was about to spill and when that happens, Alex gets on edge.

//

_I pushed the girl away for the third time, watching as she tumbled to the floor. I kicked her clothes out of the bedroom and watched her stumble out, barely being able to walk on her own two feet._

_I reached over my bedside to grab the pill bottle and cursed loudly when I found it was empty. Fucking bitch must've taken the sleeping pills while I was passed out._

_I made my way towards the bathroom slowly and grabbed the small mirror that was on the edge, traces of white powder evident on it. I snorted and brushed it away, not caring that the mirror shattered on the floor before yanking open my medicine cabinet._

_Finally, a drug that caused me to just mellow out or whatever. _

_I stumbled back into the bedroom and collapsed on the bed, chuckling at myself while the baggy full of white powder fell to the floor. I picked it up and my head bumped the bedside table, causing a small frame to drop and her face come into view. I scrambled up on the bed as if it scorched me and looked at the small mirror in my hand with the deadliest drug my parents have ever warned me about._

_Cocaine._

_If everyone wanted to accuse me of being a drug addict and a careless person, so be it. I became what the town saw me as. The mother who allowed her daughter to be taken away because of her carelessness. _

_The person who turned to drugs for help instead of doing the right thing and fighting to get her daughter back._

_The fuck up._

_I started to pick up the tightly rolled up twenty dollar bill when I heard a gasp. I blinked at the fuzzy figure in my way and scowled. "Go away, I'm not in the mood to fuck."_

_Before I could snort the drug into my system, it was snatched away and I stood up, shoving the person backwards. "Who the fuck do you think you are?!" I screamed._

"_A friend." His voice was so familiar that it shocked me. "Put some clothes on."_

_The figure took the baggy and the essentials and slammed the bedroom door behind him. I pulled on a familiar black jersey and ripped jeans, biting my nails as I walked out into the living room. _

"_I didn't want to believe her." Aiden whispered. "I didn't want Alex to be right about you."  
_

"_What are you talking about?" I asked, grabbing some water and chugging it back, feeling dehydrated. It had been years since I've even seen my own cousin._

"_Why didn't you tell us you had a daughter?" He leaned forward and stared at me. "You made our parents keep it a secret, why?"_

"_You wouldn't understand." I snapped and moved to grab some more water._

"_Then enlighten me, Ash," he got up off the couch, "we're cousins and you couldn't even tell me that I had a baby cousin running about?"_

"_We're cousins? We're family?" I laughed and threw a bottle at him, narrowing my eyes. "What the fuck ever! Was I invited to your wedding six years ago?"_

Aiden swallowed and sighed. "We just didn't want any drama and since we were having it at the Carlins…"

"_So you decided to cut me out." I snorted and looked around for a clean glass. "Doesn't anyone do fucking dishes around here?"_

"_No one else lives here but you," he shrugged, "and your whores."_

"_Fuck you." I laughed sarcastically and looked straight at him. "Why are you here? Did Alex get bored of rescuing me?"_

"_Alex has her own family emergency," he snapped back in a tough way, handing me back the bottled water I threw him, "and I was worried about you. I heard about Aunt Christine and Uncle Raife. I'm sorry I couldn't make it to the funeral."_

"_Whatever." I shrugged and sat back down on the couch. "That was nearly six months ago."_

"_I know. It took me a while to find you because of your name change. Alex broke down and told me." Aiden moved to sit beside me and looked at me sadly. "How old is she?"_

"_Eight," I murmured, feeling that heavy pressure in my chest. "She'll be nine in about five months."_

"_What's her name?" He asked softly._

"_Dylan." I whispered, feeling the pounding in my head increase. "Dylan Marie."_

_Aiden pulled me into his arms and hugged me, rocking back and forth. "Well, Kyla and I have another child," I looked up at him with a small smile, "she's three. Her name is Cailyn."  
_

"_Congrats." I mumbled, somewhat sleepily. "I would like to meet your family sometime."_

"_You too." Aiden smiled and held me by my shoulders. "Come on, you should get cleaned up." He patted my leg._

"_I'm not going anywhere." I frowned._

"_Yes, you are." He tugged me towards the bedroom and tossed me another shirt to put on. "You look great in Spence's old jersey but I don't think you want to spring attention on yourself." _

_That was my first step to getting help. Accepting the help Aiden had offered. I hadn't seen him since graduation either but it felt good to know he was there after all._

_He told me if I couldn't get help for myself, I should get it for Dylan. He grabbed the picture that was lying on the floor and stuffed it in my pocket, so that I carried around a reason to get onto the right path. "Ash," he whispered, "she's beautiful."_

_Aiden promised he wouldn't tell a soul about me. He promised he'd disappear and pretend he never found me. I told him he didn't have too but he suggested it'd be best while I got better; fewer distractions that way._

_I promised him that I would get help. I promised him that the facility he dropped me off at would be my home until I was ready to face the world sober again._

_Until I was ready to get Dylan Davies back._

_Even when they let me go, I would still check myself back in until I knew for sure I was ready._

//

I looked at the picture in my hand and smiled at Alex. "Thank you for telling Aiden."

Alex looked shocked yet relieved. "He said he never found you."

"He did." I nodded and looped my arm through hers. "He saved me."

Blood over water, right?

-\-/-


	15. Maybe It's Just Me

**Flashbacks are in **_italics_

**12 - Maybe It's Just Me**

**Alex's PoV**

_I tossed my head back and laughed as the cute brunette touched my arm, laughing as well at the joke that was thrown out there by some other groupie._

"_So Alex, is the tour bus ready?" Cute brunette batted her long eyelashes at me and I smiled, touching her cheek and pressing my lips to her ear._

"_Not for you sweetheart." I murmured and she pulled back, looking somewhat defeated._

"_Alexis Marie Carlin." Sammy's voice boomed through the swarm of ladies that surrounded me. She looked a little pissed and I couldn't blame her. I was supposed to meet her out back and instead got caught up in the sea of women._

"_Samantha," I smiled, trying not to make a scene, "I was just coming to get you."_

_Sammy rolled her eyes and tapped her watch. "You do realize I have a flight to catch in a few hours? I was hoping to at least get some alone time with my __**girlfriend**__." She emphasized the last word and looked at the other women around me. "But it seems you have your hands full."_

"_No!" I rushed and caught her by the wrist. "I'm sorry, they are fans that wanted attention." I whispered._

_Sammy cocked an eyebrow and shook her head, laughing slightly. "I'm your girlfriend who wants your attention. Seems your priorities are somewhere else." She continued to walk away and I swallowed, following her like a lost puppy that had just been kicked. "Go away Alex." She said in a hurry as she swung the large steel door open, both of us taking a deep breath of the fresh air._

"_Please," I pleaded quietly and she spun around to stare at me, "I've missed you."_

"_I could tell." Sammy sighed, somewhat defeated as she bit her lip. "I skipped two finals to come see you this weekend and I've seen you a total of ten hours. Five of them sleeping and two of them watching you in concert."_

_I swallowed and noticed tears fill up in her eyes. "Sam," I whispered again, stepping closer to her, "come here."_

"_No." Sammy shook her head and stepped away, pulling a pair of sunglasses over her eyes. "I'm proud of you Alex, I am," she whispered, "I've watched you blossom into a beautiful musician who takes her talent seriously." Her eyes were covered and I couldn't see them, it bothered me but every time I stepped closer to her, she'd step back. "I'm going to go to Greece and do some work and research there this summer," she sniffled and looked away before her eyes became clear again, her sunglasses now on top of her head, "I can't do this anymore."_

"_What?" I asked, frowning._

"_This!" Sammy said loudly, twirling around with her hair flowing behind her. "God Alex, you have lost yourself in all of this."  
_

"_I am right here." I grabbed her by the shoulders gently and she stopped her movements, staring at me. "See? I'm right. Here."_

"_Why don't you take a break?" She finally said, casting her eyes downwards, almost shyly._

"_A break. I can't take a break, I'm in the middle of a huge tour and I fly out to Japan next week!" My eyes widened at the thought of leaving millions of fans disappointed._

"_You'd rather leave than be with me?" Her voice sounded hurt._

"_Sam you can't ask me to choose between this and you. You just said you were proud of me." I crossed my arms._

"_Well I'm sorry okay?" Sammy hollered and laughed as if it was the funniest thing in the world. "I'm only human. I miss my girlfriend and all I wanted to do was just be with her. Is that too much for a girl to ask?"_

"_No," I whispered and hung my head, "I really do miss you."  
_

_Blue eyes snapped up to challenge me. "Then prove it." _

_I stepped back and frowned, shaking my head. "I will not leave this tour! I've worked too damn hard to be where I'm at!"_

"_Right, and everything I've ever done for you, for us, is just bullshit? It doesn't count? We don't count?" Sammy yelled angrily and glared at me. "Fine, so you don't want to leave your tour, I get that. At least take a fucking break afterwards."_

_I swallowed. "I was going to start the next albu-"_

"_I can't do this." She finally said in a calmer tone. "I can't do this with you anymore Alexis. We're living two separate lives now and I really don't know how we're going to get it all sorted out into one."_

"_Don't you dare say we're over." I hissed in a hurtful tone, tears threatening to spill._

"_Do you even remember what today is?" Sammy blinked back her own tears. I stared at her and she just shook her head and grabbed her wallet, throwing me her hotel room key. "You want to live the life of a rock star? Fine. Have fun. Enjoy it Alexis, really, because when you look ahead and realize that the path you chose was not right for you," she gave me one last glance before putting on her shades, "I won't be here."_

_I watched her walk away while yelling her name but she didn't listen. She didn't want me. Maybe if I gave her time she'd come back._

"_**Do you even remember what today is?" Sammy blinked back her own tears.**_

_As I watched her walk away and heard the tears coming from her, I realized what day it was._

_Her birthday._

//

I haven't paid my dues. I haven't even begun to make up for the mistakes I have made in the past. My relationship with Sammy ended so quickly and I did what I swore I wouldn't – watch her walk away.

I've come to find Sammy in my life again. A successful journalist who travels the world and writes columns for National Geographic. She added me as a friend on 'Facebook' and asked if we could meet up sometime. It was heaven in its own right but I couldn't jump at the chance before talking with Tracey.

Given the history.

"You really don't mind?" I asked Tracey as she sat back on the bed, curling her feet under her.

"Why would I mind?" Tracey let out a soft smile and patted the spot beside her. "I mean, do you feel I have a need to be worried?"

"No!" I jumped on the bed and tackled her backwards, playing with the collar of her shirt. "I just, I wasn't sure how you'd react."

"Alex, I'm not that woman." She sighed and tucked some hair behind my ear. "You can be friends with exes without me getting all jealous," her hand splayed over my heart, "I know that I have you."

I smiled and nodded, moving to kiss her softly.

"When will she be in town?" Tracey asked, her fingers threading through my hair.

"She is in town." I bit my lip and brown eyes looked at me curiously. "I wasn't keeping it from you. She just let me know through an email this morning."

Tracey nodded and looked at the clock. "Well I'm leaving again in three hours, so if you can make it until after then, it'd be appreciated."

I grinned and winked. "I'm yours for however long you need me, or want me."

"Let's try forever." Tracey grinned and pulled me back down on top of her.

I wasn't going to waste time with her like I did in the past. Tracey Philips was no Samantha Taylor but that was the point. They were different and I could make Tracey happy, I could live my life for her and I took breaks when she asked me too.

Despite how in love with Sammy I was in the past, it didn't compare to how I felt with the woman in my arms.

//

"Well," her voice was thick and I smiled at her as she approached my booth in 'Rapture', "looking good as always."

"You too," I stood up and waited until she slid into her own seat, "how are you, Sam?"

Sammy nodded and took a sip of the ice water I ordered for her beforehand. "Not bad really. I'm actually getting ready to fly back down to New Zealand to do some research."

Sammy loved to travel. It had been a while since we talked and even though we made amends after our break-up, things were never the same for us. Not even best friend status was in the friendship we had shared.

We've drifted completely. "How are you?" She asked, quirking an eyebrow. "Congrats on the engagement."

"Thanks." I smiled. "I've stopped touring for a bit but hopefully things will pick back up in March."

Sammy nodded and looked around the place we were sitting at. "You weren't lying when you said this place was pretty amazing."

"I know," I beamed and she chuckled, "wait until you meet the owners."

As if on cue, Chase came out and took out her notepad, looking at us smiling. "What can I get for you and your friend, Alex?"

Sammy looked the woman up and down and smiled at me. "Now I see why you come here."

Chase raised an amused eyebrow and leaned forward. "And why would that be?"

"Ugh," Jaiden came out of nowhere and pushed her mother out of the way, "why do women have to hit on you while I'm here?!" She looked over at Sammy and tilted her head, a small smirk tugging at her lips. "Ah, I see why now."

"Don't you have a girlfriend you should be drooling over?" I asked as Sammy chuckled when Jaiden nodded but scooted into our booth with us.

"Jaiden," Chase tapped her fingers on the table, "you're working."

"I'm taking a fifteen," she stared at Sammy and curled her lips into a bigger smile, "maybe my lunch, who knows."

"Jai, what did I tell you about hitting on women in front of me." Chase scolded and the teen somewhat rolled her eyes while looking at me.

"Keep her here for a while," she whispered in my ear referring to Sammy.

"Jaiden." Chase scolded a second time.

"Okay okay!" The brunette teen got up and glared playfully at her mother. "Next time you decide to make out with Mom in front of me, think about the kinds of flirting I can do in front of you." And she was off.

Sammy raised an eyebrow and looked up at Chase. "She's your daughter?"

"I guess…if I claim her." Chase grinned and looked at me. "So, order?"

"We'll just share a plate of fries." Sammy offered and smiled at me. "Extra vinegar."

Ah, she still knew me.

"Wow, friendly place." Sammy chuckled and looked around again. "So this is the place that Spencer and Ashley raved about years ago?"

I nodded. "Yea, weird huh?"

"Slightly." She shrugged. "Who would've thought that Spencer would find her way back here after all these years."

"I know." I smiled and Sammy caught my gaze.

"How is Tracey?" She asked softly, genuinely wanting to know.

"She's good," I smiled, "she actually just flew out to Toronto. I never seem to have her by me long enough."

"I know the feeling." Sammy whispered and took another sip of her water. "But you two are good?"

"We're perfect." I tried not to smile as big as I was but I couldn't help it. "What about you? Anyone special in your life?"

"We actually just broke up," Sammy shrugged, "Teresa met some woman online and that was that. I'm pretty much single and rather loving it."

"Fries for the beautiful lady," Jaiden came out with a plate of fries and a bottle of vinegar, "and Alex."

I smirked. "Better watch it or you won't be getting any tips."

Jaiden's face fell and she pouted. For a seventeen year old she was definitely a catch and a half. It was no wonder her parents had a hard time keeping her tame. She used her good looks to her advantage.

"Be nice." Sammy scolded and looked at the brunette. "Here's a tip, ignore Alex. She gets cranky when she hasn't eaten."

Jaiden grinned and nodded. "I like you." She pointed to Sammy and walked away.

"Watch it." I raised an eyebrow and pointed outside. She followed my finger that pointed across the street at the tattoo shop. "Her girlfriend works over there and she's pretty tough looking."

Sammy's gaze never ventured off the brunette that emerged from the shop, decked in black with a grunge look to her, "well she's got the wardrobe down but can she seriously kick ass?"

I gasped. "Jaiden's seventeen!"

"And I'm not interested." Sammy laughed. "Man I've missed you Carlin."

Carlin.

She's never called me Carlin before.

Things definitely changed.

-\-/-


	16. Listen To What You're Not Saying

_**S****isterly drama and Spencer finally finds out a huge secret.**_

**13 - Listen To What You're Not Saying**

**Spencer's PoV**

Lucas came into the living room and looked at me with sad eyes. "What's wrong?" I whispered and she pointed upstairs.

"Dylan's crying again." She whispered back, sadly. "She wants you."

I nodded and kissed the small blonde on the forehead before taking her hand as we went upstairs quietly. I pushed Dylan's door opened and found her body curled up in a small ball, shaking with tears. "Oh baby girl," I hushed and scooped her up in my arms, pressing a kiss to her forehead, "what's wrong?"

Dylan held me tighter but never said anything. I allowed her to cry it all out before a few sniffles came out of her and she blinked, her brown eyes on me intensely. "I miss her."

"She misses her mommy," Lucas crawled up beside us and snuggled into the bed, her hand holding Dylan's.

"I told you I loved you," Dylan finally hiccupped and she looked down to her fingers that were being caressed by Lucas', "the last person I told I loved them was my mommy and then I never sawed her again."

My heart broke as tears began to gather in her eyes again. I rubbed her back, soothing her as she let it all out. "I love you Dylan," I whispered and she cried even harder. "It's okay to love someone else other than your mommy."

"But what if she never comes back?" Dylan whispered into my neck and Lucas and I shared a sad look.

"If she comes back," I spoke softly, "then you'll get to live with her again and create more memories." She had shared many memories of her mother and herself and not one of them led me to believe that this 'Leigh Avery' was a bad parent. "But we're going to miss you if she does come back."

Lucas nodded, her own sniffles filled the room. "We would."

"I would miss you too." Dylan peered over at my daughter and scooted off my lap to hug Lucas hard.

After calming down the two girls, I made my way back downstairs and cleaned up a bit before turning off the lights. I had to be up early in the morning again and since I hadn't seen Alex all evening, I wasn't sure if she had made it back yet from her visit with Sammy.

I knocked on the spare bedroom door and it came open slightly, revealing that no one was there. The room was more than tidy, thanking the Lesbian God that Tracey liked things cleaned. Whenever she was visiting, she'd always help me with the house cleaning.

When I noticed a black photo album out, I couldn't help but check it out. The front was engraved: **Alex's Favourite Memories**. I flipped through the first page and grinned as the three faces of the Carlin kids were plastered all over the pages. Glen always had to be making a funny face, never taking the camera seriously. I always had a puck in my hand and Alex always had headphones in her ears.

The first couple of pages were pictures of birthday parties, dance recitals and my hockey games. Then we got into pictures of girls and boys I barely recognize from her freshman year. A picture of a boy taller than Aiden, kissing her cheek while another girl kissed her other cheek. Alex had the charm even if she thought she didn't have it.

It may have been wrong to snoop through the book of her memories and I would've stopped but when I put the book back down, a folded letter fell to the floor and all that I could see was 'Love, Ashley.'.

I swallowed hard picked up the letter, shakily unfolding it. Ashley and Alex's life for the past twelve years was private. No one knew and no one really asked, scared that they'd find out they were more than friends.

I couldn't handle that but I knew that it probably never happened.

I sat on the neatly made bed and chewed on my bottom lip before taking a deep breath and reading it.

**Dearest Alexis,**

**First, I just wanted to congratulate you on your graduation. You've worked hard for it and I'm sure you made your family proud. I'm sorry I couldn't make it but I don't think that would've been the safest or brightest idea. Too much drama.**

**It's sad how everything revolves back to drama, right? Anyway, I just got back from the States and found your letter in my mailbox. Of course you can stay with me if you get accepted to U of V! Like I'd deny you a spot in the spare room.**

**I'm sorry to hear you and your sister aren't doing too well these days. Go easy on her, she's got a tough career ahead of her and we both know how hard she works to be where she's at. Between her courses and playing hockey, she's probably just tired. **

**And yes, I miss her. I miss her more than you'll ever know. It's been a year and she's still all I ever think about. It wasn't just some high school fling, she was it. But I couldn't stand in her way, you know? She may resent me for it and she may hate me but God, I just wanted her happy. Then she gave me my grad gift with her jersey and a note that said I was all she ever needed – I turned around. I knew I wanted her. I knew I'd try my best to make it work but when I got there, she was already gone.**

**With Carmen.**

**I was slightly upset and scared. I was stupid. I was…**

**Being me…**

I swallowed and reread the part about her coming back to see me. I reread it again and the more I read it, the more I felt angry. I didn't bother reading the rest, instead I pulled the book onto my lap and flipped through random pictures of us in high school.

My breath caught in my throat when one picture stared back at me. Two brunette's and a raven haired Alex in a booth at what looked like an arcade of some sort.

Two twin smiles stared back at me with two pairs of warm chocolate brown eyes.

I closed my eyes and swallowed the bile that threatened to spill.

"Oh hey Spence!" Alex came into the room and stopped in her tracks when I stood up abruptly. "What's wrong?" She glanced down at the book in my hands and gasped.

Loudly.

"I can't fucking believe you." I hissed, thrusting the letter in her hands before shoving the book in her arms next. "You knew this whole fucking time who she was? Who she belonged too?"

"Spence," Alex's voice quivered and I shook my head, signalling to her that she needed to be quiet.

It was my time to talk.

Since she didn't have the balls too.

"Dylan Avery!" I said again, laughing at how oblivious I had been. "That should have been the first clue."

"I can explain."

"Explain what? Huh?" I successfully remained quiet, careful not to wake the girls. "I knew you had a life with Ashley, I did. I knew you two shared secrets that no one else knew. But this Alex? You've been here for a couple of months and you've allowed Dylan to get attached to you knowing exactly who she was but never spoke a word to me?"

"I just didn't want any drama stirred up!" Alex frowned.

"Drama? Drama?" I snorted and made air quotes with my fingers, "what is life without drama?" I quoted her.

"Spencer…"

"I don't want to hear it." I walked out of the bedroom and found her following me. "Alex, go away."

"I'm tired of people telling me that!" Alex's voice raised and I shoved her back in the room, shutting the door.

"Be quiet." I hissed and poked her in the shoulder. "You know why people tell you that? Because you've yet to grow up. God Alex, you've done so much better since Tracey has been in your life but you've still got this whole attitude about you thinking that your own shit doesn't stink!"

"I resent that!" Alex choked back and threw her book on the bed, facing me.

"Dylan is Ashley's daughter. Something a little big that you failed to mention to me, don't you think?" I frowned.

"Okay, so I messed up!" Alex cried and moved to block the door. "I was going to tell you Spence, I was."

"When? When Ashley knocks on my door ready to take Dylan away? When the court finds her fit enough to have her daughter back leaving my own daughter distraught and depressed?!" I pointed towards the door, making my point loud and clear. "You can go off and do your little tours and fuck your little groupies or do whatever is that you do on the road once this is all said and done," I narrowed my eyes at her, "but Lucas is my daughter and once she finds this out, once _Leigh_ comes knocking on my door ready to take Dylan away – I'm the one who's left cleaning up all the pieces. Not you."

I watched as Alex argued with herself internally and before she could say anything, I laughed once again. "You know, I told myself that it was better to forgive you then relive all the hurtful things you said to me. I really thought I could," I grabbed her wrist and pulled her aside, opening the bedroom door, "but it just feels like everything between then and now was a complete lie. You knew how I felt about Ashley, Alex. You knew how bad I missed her and-"

"You slept with a random guy!" Alex bit her lip.

"See? Still haven't grown up." I whispered disappointedly. Before I walked away completely, I turned around and pointed to the letter that was still resting inside her hand. "Why didn't you tell me Ashley came back for me?"

"I didn't want to hurt you." Alex hung her head.

"Look how well that turned out." I said in a hurtful tone before turning off the hallway light and making my way upstairs.

I opened the door to Dylan's room and found both girls snuggled close together. I made my way quietly into the bedroom and brushed blonde strands away from Lucas' face, kissing her cheek softly.

I proceeded to do the same with Dylan, taking a moment to watch her pouty lips parted as she breathed softly. I pressed a soft kiss to her forehead and smiled as she sighed contently. Now that I knew the truth about Dylan's mother, I noticed just how much she looked like her… her… Ashley…

"Good night my girls." I whispered before shutting the door quietly and leaning against it.

My heart pounded hard in my chest as I thought about running into Ashley again for the first time in over a decade. What made it beat even harder was the fact for the first time, I wanted to meet that woman face to face.

I wanted to see her and ask why?

Why was Dylan in the system? Why was she so stupid, drinking and driving with her daughter in the car? Why the hell did she wait so long to turn around and see me at the end of graduation?

Just…

Why?

-\-/-


	17. Brown Eyed Girl

_I've noticed that some of you are angry with Spencer and her reactions and some are on her side. I think it's a sister code thing. I believe the main thing that hurt Spencer was the fact that Alex couldn't talk to her, especially knowing how she was fighting with the possibility of losing Dylan to begin with. Also, why would Alex hide the fact that Ashley came after Graduation? Because I'm the author, I'm biased on both parts. I just really like your reactions, so keep them up!_

_I don't own SoN._

**14 - Brown Eyed Girl**

**Spencer's PoV**

"Pick it up!" Dylan screamed from the ice as Lucas passed her the puck. "Yes!" She squealed as the puck landed against her stick and she skated down the rink.

I smirked when she sent the slap shot flying towards the goalie and set it up perfectly for Lucas to swipe it and shoot the puck between the goalie's legs.

"Yes!" Dylan high fived the blonde and laughed as the woman behind the goalie mask skated after them on the rink.

Finally, I found all three ladies by my side and Lucas tugged on my old jersey. "Can Dylan and I skate a bit more?" I nodded and she grinned, taking Dylan by the hand. "Come on Dyl!"

The 'goalie' took her mask off and she laughed. "Wow Spence, got yourself a handful with the skaters."

God I missed her.

"They're great." I smiled and patted her hand. "It was really nice of you to come out on your time off."

Carmen nudged me and looped her arm through mine. "We're best friends. Well you're my best friend and I missed you and Luc." She shrugged with a grin and averted her eyes to the two girls skating around the ice. "The little one is a cutie," she frowned slightly, "I thought you said you weren't going to take any more kids in?"

I nodded and sighed heavily. "I did say that but she's special."

Special as in Ashley's daughter.

Carmen nodded slowly before taking off her gear and sitting beside me. "I've been away far too long because I know that look in your eye and you're not telling me everything."

"My dad called me a few months ago," I started out slowly and looked at her, "he said there was an important case and that Dylan needed a really good home. She had been in too many abusive homes for the past year and I guess he felt she'd be safer here."

"Where is she originally from?" Carmen asked softly.

"I'm going to guess B.C., but her file says they were living in Brandon, Manitoba when Dylan was taken away." I watched as Lucas taught Dylan how to stop sharply without falling. I could hear their laughter echo through the arena and it warmed my heart.

"Every child is special," Carmen nodded, "but what made her so special that it completely changed your mind about having more foster kids?"

"I just met with her one day and pretty much fell in love." I honestly could admit that much but now I knew why.

She was Ashley's daughter.

I was still getting over the shock and as much as I wanted answers, I was still too angry to speak to Alex.

"She's um," I scratched my chin and let out a small nervous chuckle, "she's actually uh, Leigh Avery's daughter."

Carmen raised an eyebrow and nodded slowly but I knew she wasn't following. "I don't know a Leigh Avery. I know a Kim Avery and man the things that woman could do with her tongue-"

"Carmen!" I laughed and she shrugged, smirking.

"Oh whatever, you would've enjoyed it to if you weren't so into _Aimee._" She whispered.

"I'm not into Aimee," I sighed heavily and shook my head, "let's not get off focus here, we're talking about Dylan's mother."

"Well like I said, I don't know a Leigh Avery." Carmen shrugged again and watched as Dylan did another slap shot. "Go Dylan!" She hollered and I grinned. "So who is she?"

I cleared my throat and waited until my heart slowed a little. "Ashley Davies."

//

"What?!" Carmen hissed as we sat in a booth at 'Rapture'. "Are you fucking kidding me?" She was still freaking out about the information I had given her.

"Bad word." Lucas sang as she ran by to bring Dylan a book to their table with Jaiden and Jyll.

"Why is she 'Leigh Avery'?" Mandez squinted her eyes in confusion and noticed I remained quiet. "How do you even know this? I mean yea, look at her, she's a walking, talking miniature Ashley, but still."

"Alex knew." I shrugged. "She knew this whole time about Ashley's daughter and that I was taking care of her."

Carmen leaned over the table and looked around us cautiously. "This has got to be the most awkward situation you've ever been in."

I chuckled, despite the serious moment, and shook my head. "What was awkward was getting caught in beds naked."

Carmen chuckled and nodded. "Yea, nothing could top that. I would've loved to be there when Aiden found you in Ashley's bed."

I smirked. I still felt bad for how things turned out and even though it was a rough time with the four involved, things seemed to have straightened themselves out. "That was pretty classic."

"Agreed." Carmen nodded her head and then looked up at me. "So, how are you handling this information?"

I sighed heavily. "I don't know how to handle this information, you know? I mean, Dylan's become a part of this family and she's such a wonderful child, I really didn't see that one coming."

Mandez bit her lip and tilted her head to the side. "Have you talked to Alex since last night?"

"No." I scowled. "I'm still pissed and what makes matters worse? My father even knew and didn't tell me."

"Oh." Carmen frowned. "Well I didn't know so don't go all 'Bitch Carlin' on my ass, kay?"

I smiled softly. "I won't."

"Carmen, I never knew you were in town." Ephiny joined us while placing down our cokes and sat beside me in the booth.

"I'm sneaky that way." Carmen winked. "Where's Chase?"

"At a school meeting with Jaiden's teacher. Seems she skipped school again and we found her sporting a nice tattoo on her right lower hip." Ephiny sighed and looked at me. "Are you sure you don't want to adopt her?"

I chuckled and looked over towards the four women at the other booth. "She's pretty much at my house all the time anyway," I shrugged, "the girls love her, why not?" I teased.

"Great. I'll pack her bags tonight." Ephiny chuckled and blew hair out of her eyes. "Nah, she's been going through this phase lately but she's still coming in on curfews so I can't be that upset. It just doesn't help when her girlfriend's parents own the tattoo shop."

Carmen snickered and looked towards Jyll. "Isn't she the girl that was teased for only wearing pink in grade six?"

"Yea," Ephiny laughed softly, "Jaiden brought her home one day and introduced her to the world of 'black is the new pink'."

"Cute couple." I shrugged. "Jyll's a sweetheart."

"Yea yea," the brunette rolled her eyes and turned back to face Carmen, "so how long you in town for?"

Carmen looked at me and licked her lips, her face looked perplexed and she shared a sad smile with me. "For however long my Spencey needs me."

Ephiny grinned. "You two would make a very good lookin' couple."

"I agree," Carmen reached over and patted my cheek, "but she loves another."

"I don't love Aimee!" I huffed and both women looked at me.

"I wasn't talking about Aimee," Mandez smiled but said nothing else.

Oh.

"Okay then, I should go and serve that table over there before Jaiden starts a riot." Ephiny smiled and rolled her eyes. "Catch up with you two later."

"Too bad she's married. She's a total MILF." Carmen snickered.

"Gross." I laughed. "Okay, so Eph's hot but she's like a sister to me."

Carmen shrugged and we both turned our heads when we heard a high pitched laugh coming from Lucas' table. Dylan was giggling hard.

"Damn fate eh?"

"What?" I looked at her confused.

"Who would've thought the one person that could possibly bring you and Ashley back together again would be a certain beautiful brown eyed girl." Carmen whispered sincerely and squeezed my hand.

Dylan and Lucas' laughter could be heard again and I bit my lip.

I wasn't sure whether I should fear the day Ashley came to get her little girl or if I should be excited yet slighty anxious.

Brown eyed girl.

My favourite colour and it suited the Davies women just fine.

-\-/-


	18. Coach Who?

**Flashbacks are in **_italics._

**This flashback was taken from **Wash It All Away – **Chapter 52.2: Holding My Breath.**

**15 - Coach…Who?**

**Ashley's PoV**

Victory.

Happiness.

Ecstatic.

Overwhelmed.

I was feeling it all as I hopped into my classic new mustang, hitting the highway. "I've been waiting for this moment."

"We have one more case to go through," Chelsea Lewis smiled at me. She was my new case worker and was assigned to help me get Dylan back. "When we get to Kenora, you will be informed on more information of the young woman taking care of your daughter."

I nodded and gripped the steering wheel. "I'm so excited." I couldn't help it, I was on my way to see my daughter. I haven't seen her in long over a year and if I had one wish, it'd be to have her back in my life, safe and warm. It didn't even register in my head the destination she had just told me. "Wait, what?" I blinked. "Where did you say we're going?"

"Six hours West." Chelsea tilted her head and looked at me. "Looks like you've seen a ghost."

"Kenora?" I repeated and gripped the steering wheel in my hand. "Wow."

Memories of the place flooded through my head. Memories that I've thought about every single day.

"You okay Ashley?" Chelsea patted my shoulder and I nodded slowly. "Are you familiar with Kenora?"

Was I familiar with Kenora?

The greatest moment of my life happened there.

//

_You would think it was thundering out with the sounds my heart was making by pounding hard against my chest, causing the blood to rush wildly in my ears._

_Her blue eyes were heavy on me as her chest heaved with anticipation. I blindsided the poor girl with the question that I wanted to ask her and never really meant too, but it was there. It was out there and that was truly how I felt but I didn't want to scare her away._

_She looked like she was about to cry and I couldn't tell if it was a bad thing or a good thing. I started to panic, thinking I probably just ruined the strong relationship we worked hard to create._

_"I didn't mean," I sighed heavily and ducked my head a little bit, "like right now or anything. I mean, I want to marry you in the future of course. Not right now because we're young and we've got other things to think about and I really didn't mea-"_

_"Yes." Her voice was barely a whisper but I heard it loud and clear. My brown eyes snapped to her big blue shocked eyes and she licked her lips. She stared at me and I swallowed._

_Oh right._

_She was waiting for my reaction to her answer._

_"Yes." Spencer repeated a little louder but this time there was a blinding smile that spread across her face. My heart stopped._

_I could see stars but took a deep breath._

_Was I engaged?_

_Oh right._

_She was still waiting for my reaction. "Spencer," I breathed and was enveloped in her arms as her lips found mine._

_Warm flesh moved slowly against my lips. Slow was the key word. She dragged her perfectly shaped lips against mine at a pace that was almost unmovable. "Yes." She repeated again and pressed her hand against my large hoodie, over my heart._

_"Oh God." I couldn't help but smile back at her, tears were streaming down my face. "Really?"_

_Spencer nodded. I don't think she could talk either. We both leaned in to kiss over and over again._

_Needless to say that I was the happiest seventeen year old on the face of the earth._

_I pulled back, my hot breath against her lips as I dug inside my jean pocket before shakily grabbing her left hand. "I know it's not much," I whispered as I placed the band of white gold on her ring finger, chewing on my bottom lip, "but when you were warming up before your game earlier, I asked Chase if she knew a good jewellery store and well, this just seemed perfect."_

_Spencer stared at the plain yet elegant looking band before her lashes flicked upwards, her eyes burning into mine. "It's beautiful." She held her hand up and looked at the ring closely. "You didn't have too, Ash."_

_I raised an eyebrow and grabbed her left hand gently, pressing my lips against it. "I just proposed. You cannot propose without a ring, Spence." I laughed lightly when she grinned, pleased that I did have a ring._

_Spencer smirked and kissed me again. "This is perfect," she pulled back and tugged on the strings of my hoodie, "you are perfect."_

//

"So you proposed to your high school sweetheart there?" Chelsea smiled as if she were in awe.

I nodded and bit my bottom lip. "Letting her go would be the first mistake of the rest of my life."

"You were young Ash," she said softly, "besides, you didn't exactly let her go. You just wanted her to live her dream, right?"

I nodded again and pulled onto the Trans Canada highway. "We could have had Dylan together," I quietly whispered, watching the road.

"Maybe." Chelsea shrugged. "So it's been twelve years since you've seen her last, right? Do you still think about her?"

"All the time." I sighed and glanced at the dark woman beside me. "Aside from Dylan, she's the one that occupies my brain all the time."

Chelsea grinned and reached over to put on the radio. "Well we have to be in court first thing Monday morning," she said excitedly, "Carter is meeting us there of course and then depending on the results, which you have a very good chance at the visitation rights, we'll be heading to the Children's Development Centre where you'll meet with," she searched through some papers, "Kathryn Michaels and she will be handling the dates from there."

"I am so nervous," I said seriously and inhaled deeply, "I could be seeing Dylan by next week."

I could tell Chelsea was grinning as she sat back and closed her eyes. For the past month she had been helping me and Carter with my case. We had grown close and she was really my only real friend. After Alex's visit a month ago, she hadn't really kept in contact. There something going on with her but I couldn't be bothered with the silent treatment she seemed to be giving me. I had a daughter to get back and a life to start living again.

Damn her if she wanted to be that way.

--

I looked out the all too familiar window facing the lake. The water looked so cold and ice started to form around the edges seeing as it was already mid-November.

I was in the same town that held my daughter. I was in the same town that held my heart in the palm of its hand. I was in the same town that held so many beautiful memories.

I felt like I was almost home.

The sun was barely setting and I grabbed my hotel key, wanting to take a walk and see how much had really changed since being here last.

"Chels," I knocked on the hotel door across from me. Chelsea opened the door holding a bowl of popcorn and in her animal printed pyjamas, "cute."

"Ha." She sneered sleepily and yawned. "I'm going to watch a movie and then hit the sack, wanna watch one with me?"

I quickly shook my head. "Nah, I'm going to go for a walk."

"No." Chelsea grabbed my arm. "You cannot be wandering around Ashley, you know the court rules."

"I'm not going out to look for her," I said softly, honestly, "I'm just going to go and take a walk across the street. I don't know, maybe check out the gym."

"Ash," she drew my name out as if she didn't believe me, "please just stay in? They have a pool on the top floor, go for a swim!"

"I'm going for a walk," I insisted, "I promise I'll be back in twenty," I laughed quietly and threw her both sets of my car keys, "can't go anywhere too far without these, right?"

"Okay." Chelsea eyed me up and sighed. "Twenty minutes!"

"Yes mom." I rolled my eyes and smiled. "Have fun watching your movie."

The night was chilly and I was glad I was just walking across the street to the Recreation Centre. I stopped at the doorway as a bunch of kids carrying their hockey sticks ran out to meet their parents.

I slowly made my way in the building and took a deep breath before opening the doors to the one place I had yet to see for years.

A hockey rink.

The smell brought back more memories and I felt weakened with the force of it all. I looked at the pictures that were still on the wall from years ago and smiled; remembering the look in Spencer's eyes when she saw what the small town had won; the Stanley Cup.

I caught teenagers practicing on the ice and watched for a minute, leaning over the railings. Nothing really changed in the area except a few renovation jobs here and there.

I made my way down the cement steps to get a closer look at the team that was practicing on the ice. I smiled at the thought of doing this so many times back in high school; getting up before the sunrise just to get a glimpse of her skating on the ice.

I missed the sounds of the skates even.

I missed it all.

"Fresh meat?" I heard a throaty laugh behind me and spun around to find a rather attractive brunette in hockey gear staring at me.

"Excuse me?"

"Well I know you're not exactly from high school but it looks as if you're interested in playing." She smirked and stepped closer, holding onto her hockey stick.

"Oh," I smiled, "I'm just admiring what I can't do."

"I see." She smiled and shrugged. "Well feel free to join us if you want too. I'm sure Coach Carlin would love to check you out," she winked, "if you know what I mean."

What?

Huh?

Eh?

I blinked and my mouth went slack. She didn't just say Coach Carlin-

Did she?

--

**Jaiden's PoV**

I think I broke the hot brunette. She looked like she had just been hit by a ton of…

…something.

"Oh," I said with the nod of my head, "you're not gay."

"Huh?" She blinked again and licked her lips. "No, wait, what? Yes I am."

Poor thing was confused. I loved when they got confused. It was fun to mess with them but something about her was different. Something about her seemed so familiar yet not at all.

And she looked a little pale.

"I'm sorry, did I do something wrong?" I asked, frowning slightly.

"No." The woman sighed and rubbed her forehead. "No sorry, I just, I swear I heard you say someone's name."

I nodded slowly and tucked my helmet under my arm. "You're new around here, aren't you?" I smiled and she smiled questioningly. "What gave it away?" I asked for her and she nodded. "I would've definitely noticed you."

Even though she did look eerily familiar.

"Aren't you like, what, sixteen?" She asked in an amused voice.

"Nice try," I laughed and placed my helmet on top of my head, "feel free to stick around, maybe I can show you around afterwards." I winked and she had an amused look on her face.

"Wynters!" I swung my head to look over at the ever impatient Coach Carlin. "Stop flirting with the hot brunette and get your ass back on the ice!"

"Man she's good isn't she?" I laughed, "she knows your hot and she's yet to see your face. That's Coach Carlin for ya." I smiled and brushed passed the shocked looking brunette.

She was definitely in shock. I bit my lip and skated towards Coach Carlin. "Um, that woman over there seems to be having some crazy shock fit. You should _check_ her out." I grinned and went back towards the team.

-\-/-

_Give it a few more chapters and you'll have your Spashley reunion. No worries, most of the drama-angst is over with. Almost._


	19. And She Was Spotted

_**I know some of you have expressed that flashbacks weren't your thing and I apologize for that. I need them to untangle things little by little seeing as 12 years is a long time and there is information that needs to be filled in. I like writing them, I just hope on some level you enjoy reading them as well. Once the fic moves on and things balance out, the flashbacks will stop a little. Thank you all for reading and reviewing. You make this fun for me. I heart you all!**_

_**I don't own SoN - and rest easy, this isn't a Spangs fic by any means. They are simply best friends. Carmen will always have a soft spot for Spencer, but it never evolves into anything. Trust me. Spashley forever, right?**_

**Flashbacks in **_italics_

**16 - And She Was Spotted**

**Spencer's PoV**

I blew the whistle to signal that practice was over.

The woman Jaiden was talking about quickly left the arena in a hurry and man she moved fast. I shook my head and followed the girls into the locker room.

"I still think you should've went after her, she was a total hottie!" Jaiden sang as she started to get out of her gear.

"Just go shower." I laughed and shook my head. Jaiden had to be the most entertaining teenager I've ever encountered.

"Coach Carlin," I snapped my head up to see Carmen standing in the door way, "lookin' fine as always."

"God," I smirked and walked over to her, "you've really got to stop trying to get into my pants."

"Never." Carmen winked and shrugged. "I was bored at your place so I decided to come see you."

"Where are the girls?" I asked. Carmen was supposed to be taking care of them.

"With Ryn," she smiled, "she told me about Monday."

"Oh." I nodded and pushed her out of the locker room and into the hallway. "Yea, Ryn's supposed to be meeting Ashley on Monday."

Carmen shook her head slowly, "man I'm so sorry dude."

"Every time I think about it, I want to throw up." I said honestly, leaning against the cool cement wall. "I'm dying to see her and ask her so many questions, but the reason's she's down here is just…"

"I know." Mandez patted my arm and sighed, leaning against the wall with me. "Alex came back in town too."

"Great." I was unimpressed.

"You should just talk to her," Carmen looked at me and raised an eyebrow, "she's your sister."

"Yea? She really proved that over the past twelve years hasn't she?" I snapped. "Get real Carmen. Alex knew this whole time about Dylan. She knew and never bothered to tell me."

"Does Ashley know about Lucas?"

Interesting question.

"I don't know." I frowned and bit my lip. "I mean, if her and Alex are as close as everyone says they are, then I would have to think so."

"It's none of my business babe," Carmen slapped my knee, "but it's not all on Alex's shoulders. I think everyone has a little blame, you know?"

No, I didn't know.

What I did know was my sister held out on some very important information. She didn't have to tell me about Dylan at all. I was okay with that part. But the moment Dylan entered my home and became a part of my family, Alex should've let me in.

It wouldn't have changed how I felt towards the small brunette. In fact, even knowing the information while I did, it made me love her more. Want to protect her more.

"And please tell me you're still not going to Aimee's after this?" Carmen prayed softly.

"No." I frowned. I haven't seen Aimee in a couple of weeks and honestly, I didn't miss her. I felt bad though but she knew what we were getting into when we first started messing around. "I'm going to go home, curl up with the girls and watch a movie, eat junk food until we've passed out or feel sick."

Mandez smirked. "Sweet, I'd totally crash but I think you should use the time to maybe talk to Lucas about Monday?"

I nodded. "I know." I whispered. I had to tell Lucas about Dylan's mom returning. It wasn't going to be pretty. Lucas never got that attached to the previous children. I knew why Dylan was different, I knew the pull towards her because her mother was Ashley Davies.

"And maybe if you need to get out afterwards, you should talk with Alex." Carmen cupped my cheek and sighed. "I know you're pissed okay? And I know where you're coming from but do you really want that kind of tension around the girls come the beginning of the week?"

"Fuck you." I muttered and smiled a little. Carmen could make sense when she wanted too. "Can you swing by a little after ten?"

"I'll be there." Carmen brushed her lips against my cheek and pulled me in for a hug. I pressed my forehead against hers and smiled.

"Thank you for staying here with me. I know you probably have other things to do or women," I smirked and she just grinned.

"I love you Spence, you know that I'd drop everything just to be here with you. And I totally don't mean that in an 'I'm in love with you' sort of way," she shrugged and tucked some hair behind my ear, "you're my family. My best friend. I'd kill whoever hurts you and Luc… and Dylan," she pressed another kiss to my cheek and let me go. "So, with all the girly mushiness out of the way, I'm going to go and grab a bite to eat, rent a movie and head back to the hotel."

I laughed and watched her make her way out towards the lobby area.

"Mom is so right," Jaiden said as she leaned against the wall beside me, "you two are hot together."

"Not gonna happen." I shook my head. It would've happened already if it were too. "Did you need a ride home or…"

"Yea," Jaiden smiled, "I was going to go to Rapture but there's no point if Jyll's not at her parents shop." She shrugged and licked her lips. "So um, you planning on seeing Aimee tonight?"

I haven't planned on seeing Aimee since I heard about Ashley.

"No." I shook my head and helped Jaiden with her hockey gear. "I think my fun is over."

"Ohh?" Jaiden pouted. "You're so much happier when you're getting some. This explains why you were so impatient lately at practices."

"Shut up." I shoved the teen playfully and we both laughed. "I've just got a lot more going on now, Jai, I can't be distracted."

"Man, you should've seen that brunette today, sure you thought her ass was hot but damn she was smokin'." Jaiden chuckled and we made our way out to the vehicle. She stopped all of a sudden and frowned in thought. "That was so wrong of me to say," she shook her head, "I just realized where I recognize her from."

I raised an eyebrow and she laughed, throwing her duffle bag into the back of my Chevy Blazer, "who, your mom?"

"Ew!" Jaiden shouted and laughed. "No, she looks like Dylan, only older."

Oh.

Fuck me.

//

_I skated hard that night. I worked my ass off and I couldn't help but feel so pent up with anger. Why? Because I swear I saw Ashley at my game the previous night while we played in Vancouver, BC. I swear I saw those beautiful eyes watch me and I had to try and concentrate on the game without glancing too much into the stands._

_It wasn't the fact that I saw her that made me angry, it was the fact that I never bothered to look for her after the game. What if it was her? What if she was watching me play and secretly hoped that I'd see her and talk to her?_

_Fuck that._

_She could've waited around for me too, right?_

"_Carlin!" Kendra hissed and pushed me up against the boards. "You're losing focus and it's really starting to piss me off!"_

"_Save your foul mouth for later," I pushed her back and skated passed her, "you know I like your dirty mouth in bed only."_

"_Whatever, just fucking play the game before we lose our winning streak!" Kendra huffed and shoved me aside, making her way towards the middle of the rink._

_I glanced up at the scoreboard and realized we had seven minutes left before the game was over and we were only up by two goals. I was angry at myself for allowing the brunette from my past occupy my mind the whole day. I couldn't help it._

_I missed her._

"_Watch it." I spat as the other team player winked at me and faced me, waiting for the puck to drop._

_Kendra tapped her stick on the ice indicating that she wanted me to pass the puck to her and so I did as soon as the puck hit my stick. I moved passed the other player quickly and made my way down the ice, skating backwards to scoop the puck up and shoot it swiftly off the post and into the net._

"_YES!" Kendra laughed and gave me a huge hug, squeezing me tightly. "That was awesome!"_

_It felt good to know I kicked the goals up by one. _

_That's when I felt myself being shoved hard into the boards and my knee felt like it was just snapped in half. I fell to the ice, crying in pain as I held onto my leg, trying to will the excruciating pain away._

_I looked up to see the girl I faced off with, laughing at me. Fuck, if I wasn't hurt, I'd beat that fucking Buffy down._

"_Carlin, are you okay?" Coach rushed towards me and I could barely think let alone move and talk. _

"_Spence, are you going to be okay?" Kendra bent down and took off my helmet, brushing her fingers across my face. _

_I closed my eyes and felt myself being taken off the ice. _

_Turned out my kneecap was busted and I had to be prepped for surgery as soon as possible._

_Turned out that my career came to a halting end._

_Turned out that now aside from Lucas, I had nothing else to dream about._

_Except the brown eyed woman in the stands the night before._

_I'd definitely dream about her._

-\-/-


	20. Can't Blame Me, Can You?

**_Here's a short update for the morning. Hopefully I can get another up for you soon! _**

**17 - Can't Blame Me, Can You?**

**Alex's PoV**

"Damnit!" I threw the phone across the room and paced back and forth. I had been trying to get a hold of Ashley since Spencer discovered the huge secret I was carrying. I didn't want Ashley to walk into anything blindly but it seemed as though she either ignored my phone calls or got a different number without telling me.

"Calm yourself," Sammy sighed and stretched from the bed, throwing a magazine at Tracey, "read that article," she pointed to some porn magazine and Tracey laughed, flipping through the pages.

"Well it's nice to see you two having fun while I'm freaking here." I frowned and Tracey threw the magazine on the floor and made her way towards me.

"Alex, you're going to make yourself sick if you don't take a breather, okay? Just, relax." Her warm hands cupped my face and her lips pressed softly against mine.

"I'm with Ace on this one." Sammy shrugged and I turned to look at her. "I mean, I feel bad enough as it is not saying a word to either Spence or Ash, you know? I can only imagine how you feel."

"That helps." I deadpanned and she sighed heavily, getting up from the bed.

"Alexis," she bit her lip, "sometimes you really don't know what the right thing to think about is. You're freaking and that's okay but at the same time, Spencer has every right to be upset. I mean, you're her sister and you kept this from her. It was one thing for it to be unspoken of when Dylan wasn't in her care, but the moment she was-"

"I know." I cut her off. "Fuck, I know!"

"Ashley probably isn't ignoring you on purpose." Sammy ventured further. "She's not focused on you right now. She's focused on getting her daughter back and you know what? Good for her. I would love to see Dylan back in her mother's arms. Ashley made a mistake that cost her and sure, she didn't exactly go about it the right way but she did find help."

Tracey looked at me and nodded. "I think it's going to be a very powerful reunion," her eyes glanced downwards before looking back at me, "and I hate to admit it baby but you're going to be in the crossfire of accusations."

"Since when do you two team up to gang up on me?" I scowled and they both hugged me.

"We're not ganging up on you," Sammy whispered, "we're just not going to get your hopes up high that all will be forgiven right away with the things you've withheld."

"But no matter what," Tracey smiled, "I'll be by your side the whole way."

"And I guess I can be too." Sammy rolled her eyes playfully and stepped back. "But I'm tired of interrupting your alone time so I'm going to go find me someone single to flirt with."

"Actually I'm hungry," Tracey laced her fingers with mine, "why don't we go out to eat. I'm seriously missing Ephiny's poutine."

"Ugh, me too." Sammy moaned and grabbed my other arm.

You would think it'd be an awkward situation I found myself in. In a hotel room with my current fiancée and my ex girlfriend. But they actually got along really well and it proved to me that Sammy had moved on.

"I guess Rapture it is then." Tracey beamed and we were off.

//

"Oh no." I sighed when we walked into the café. I noticed Spencer was sitting with Carmen and the girls at a booth.

"Auntie Alex!" Lucas spotted me first and ran towards me, wrapping her arms around my legs. "I missed you!"

"Me too." I smiled and kissed her forehead.

"Hi!" Dylan hugged the other side of me and beamed up at me with her brown eyes. "Are you going to eat with us?"

"Um," I cleared my throat and Tracey's grip tightened on my hand, "I think we're going to sit over here."

"Aww you're no fun." Lucas pouted.

I glanced up to see Spencer looking at me but then quickly went back into her conversation with Carmen. "I've got an idea," I knelt down and smiled at the two girls in front of me, "what if Tracey and I take you to the movies again tomorrow night?"

Lucas and Dylan clapped excitedly and nodded their heads.

"I'll call your mom later and ask her if it's okay." I nodded and they agreed, going back to their seats.

"Don't you think you should talk to her?" Sammy asked as she slid into a booth. "Not right now or anything, but later?"

"She won't." I sighed. "I tried to call her and she's just ignoring every phone call. Even if I call from a pay phone, she just hangs up as soon as she hears my voice."

"Can't blame me, can you?" Spencer said from behind us and I spun around to look at her. "I'm still pissed Alex, more than you'll ever know but right now, it's no longer about me. This is about Dylan. So for her sake, I'm not going to drag 'us' into it. Have fun with them tomorrow night."

And she was gone back to her booth.

Sammy whistled and looked at me. "Well at least she didn't throw her Dr. Pepper in your face, right?"

-\-/-


	21. Connect The Carlins

**18 - Connect The Carlins**

**Ashley's PoV**

Coach Carlin.

Coach Carlin.

I heard her voice. I couldn't bring myself to face her at all, I really couldn't. Everything just seemed so surreal to me.

Coach Carlin.

God, what the hell kind of cosmic joke is this?

I threw my hotel key card down on the dresser and flopped back on the bed. I rubbed my temples and sighed heavily.

It all felt so overwhelming, I wasn't sure what to think or where to begin. I came to Kenora to get my daughter back and that was my main focus. But it seemed to have faltered a bit the second I heard _her_.

Not only was my girl living here, so was the one I let get away.

Stupidly may I add.

My phone started ringing and it was Alex again. I sighed heavily and bit my lip hard. I pressed talk. "This better be important." I muttered and I heard a gasp.

"_You answered your phone!" _

"What do you want Alex?" I couldn't stop from sounding a little bitter. The more I thought about the situation I was in, the more I realized Alex knew Spencer was in Kenora if she knew Dylan was in the same town.

"_Oh God, you know."_ Was the first thing that came out of her mouth.

"What? What do I know?" I sat up and ran a hand through my hair.

"_Spencer-" _

"-lives here." I interrupted her.

"_Here?" _ Alex's voice went an octave higher. _"What do you mean, here?"_

"I gotta go," I said and closed my eyes, "I need to think."

"_Wait! Ash… what do you mean by 'here'?"_ She sounded desperate.

"Here as in the same town my daughter is in, which you failed to mention by the way." I hissed and snapped my phone shut.

Years ago I would've needed a drink to help me understand this situation but I would never lay another hand on a drink again.

I knew better.

I wanted better.

The phone rang three more times before I shut it off.

"Ash?" I heard Chelsea on the other side of my door and I rushed to answer it.

"What are you still doing up?" I asked, raising an eyebrow.

"I think I'm over tired," she said sheepishly, "I was wondering if you wanted to take a drive?"

"Um…" I swallowed, "sure, where too?"

"I don't know." Chelsea shrugged. "You know this place a little more than I do. What kind of things can you do around here?"

I immediately thought of 'Rapture' and instantly put the thought away. I couldn't face that place yet.

Or ever.

Maybe.

I didn't know.

I rubbed my temples in frustration and Chelsea placed a hand on my shoulder. "Are you okay?"

"Yea." I mumbled tiredly and she gave me a stern look. "I think I should've listened to you earlier and stayed in."

"Oh please tell me you didn't see her…" Chelsea said in a panicked voice.

"No!" I was rather disappointed though. I wanted to see Dylan but I knew I had to wait. I couldn't just see her, it'd be a violation. "I um, I almost ran into my ex."

She raised a dark eyebrow. "Who?"

"High school sweetheart." I stressed and her eyes widened before she got a shit eating grin on her face. "Why the hell are you smiling like that?"

"I saw the look on your face when you mentioned her earlier." She teased but I didn't feel amused.

I mean, I just heard Spencer.

Spencer Carlin.

Spencer _Dylan_ Carlin.

It was still hard to process.

"I'm sorry," she muttered and I smiled, shaking my head.

"Don't be." I shrugged and grabbed my car keys. "I'm not too familiar with places around here but I'm sure we'll find something."

Chelsea and I grabbed our winter coats and took off to cruise around the town. I slowed down when we passed 'Rapture' and glanced in the huge picture windows and that's when I saw her.

I had to stop to allow another vehicle pull out if its parking spot and took the opportunity to glance at the blonde freely. Her hair was pulled back in a loose ponytail and tossed her head back, laughing at whatever the blonde across from her was saying. I didn't care who the other woman was, I was focused on her.

Spencer.

"Chels," I poked her arm and pointed to the window, "that's her."

I've never seen her head swing around so fast and she smiled. "Gorgeous."

"Yea." I whispered in awe and when the car honked its horn behind me, I knew it was time to move.

I still couldn't believe I just saw her.

My heart was beating so fast.

My palms were even sweating.

I licked my dry lips.

"Did you want to go to Tim Hortons?" I asked as I pressed on the gas pedal, picking up speed quickly, finding the need to suddenly just get away from any thoughts of her. I was losing focus.

"You know I love a good French vanilla cappuccino." Chelsea grinned.

Why did it always smell like burnt toast in every Tim Horton's?

I ordered two French vanilla capps and we found a spot by the window. "God Chelsea, Monday could not come soon enough."

"I bet," she smiled warmly and patted my hand. "But keep in mind that it's just a meeting Ash, okay? Carter is still working on the case with the courthouse here."

"I know but he said they if they give him the okay by Monday, I can see Dylan with supervision by the end of the week." I said in an anxious tone.

"True." Chelsea nodded. "I've talked with Kathryn Michaels on the phone before coming here and she seems to be the sweetest lady. Your daughter is in perfect hands, apparently, so you have nothing to worry about as far as that goes."

"Whoa," I turned to hear that voice I heard in the rink a few hours prior, "brunette hottie, how have ya been?"

I cleared my throat and glanced at Chelsea then back at the teenager who was now wearing a black winter coat and beanie hat. "Are you stalking me?" I asked and she laughed, shaking her head.

"I'm being the good girlfriend and getting my girl a hot chocolate," she pointed towards a shorter raven haired woman and an even shorter blonde with their backs to me. "But you're hard not to notice and I'm obnoxiously forward so I came to say hi."

"Hi." I nodded slowly with a grin.

"Hey," the girlfriend came up and tapped on the teenager's shoulder, "you're like a dollar short and Luc wanted to buy like a box of donuts."

"Oh God!" The teenager smacked her forehead. "Don't you dare let her pull that pout crap on you again, okay? Her mother will kill me if I bring her home in a sugar induced coma."

I chuckled as the other teenager laughed and shrugged. "I don't know what is about her but she's definitely picked up her mother's charms."

"Excuse me," the brunette laughed softly and made her way towards the small blonde, who was peering over the counter at the assorted donuts.

"New friend?" Chelsea grinned and blew into her coffee cup, her head tilting towards the counter.

I glanced as the three other ladies made their way towards us. "You don't mind if we join you, do you?" The brunette teenager smiled and pulled out a seat from the table beside us. "My name's Jaiden," she stuck out her hand and I took it, frowning slightly because that name sounded so familiar. "This is Jyll and," she paused when we both noticed the blonde was staring at me wide eyed, "yes Luc, she's a hottie," Jaiden looked at me, "she's usually not this shy."

I swallowed and stared into eerily familiar grey eyes that stared at me with some emotion I couldn't read.

"Jai?" The blonde whispered. "I don't feel good, can we go?"

"Sure," Jaiden frowned and looked at me, shrugging slightly, "I guess we'll see you around…" she left the sentence hanging for me to insert my name.

"Ashley." I said quietly and Jaiden bit her lip, frowning, like something clicked to her.

I felt like I was in the dark.

"Nice to meet you," she said seriously and grabbed the little girl's hand. "Come on Baby C, I've gotta get you home anyway so I can do my homework."

Baby C?

I blinked.

"Lucas Carlin." Jaiden snapped her fingers in front of the grey eyes that were locked onto mine. "Let's go."

I couldn't tear my eyes away from the little girl that walked away with the hockey player and her girlfriend.

Coach Carlin.

Lucas Carlin.

Mother and daughter?

"Hey," Chelsea patted my arm, "are you okay?"

"I think," I breathed shakily and shook my head, "I'm going to be sick."

And sick I became.

In the bathroom of Tim Hortons.

So many questions filtered through my head.

I couldn't process it at that time.

All I could do was allow Chelsea to take me back to the hotel.

I was going to stay in my room until Monday morning.

I couldn't handle anymore surprises.

-\-/-

_Ouu so close yet so far away. No worries, the reunion will be coming up soon, I promise. Once the reunion does happen, Spashley will be inseparable. _


	22. A Poisoned Name

_**Sorry for the lack of updates lately! I had every intention to update yesterday but the power went out and when it came back on, I forgot about it and ended up playing Assassin's Creed. I know, I'm horrible!! Thank you all for PMing me with concerns and for those who reviewed and read. You're all wonderful.**_

**Flashbacks are in **_italics._

This flashback was taken from **Wash It All Away – Chapter 1: **_**I Think...I Think I Like Girls**_

**19 - A Poisoned Name**

**Spencer's PoV**

I just finished putting Dylan to bed after she fell asleep on the couch during our movie time. Lucas wanted to go with Jaiden and Jyll for a quick hot chocolate run and the small brunette wanted to stay in with me.

I heard the front door open and Jaiden took Lucas' coat from her. "Hey, you two are back early," I went to pull off my daughter's scarf when she ripped it off herself, threw it to the floor and ran up the stairs, slamming her bedroom door. "What the hell was that all about?"

Jaiden raised an eyebrow and took of her hat. "We bumped into that brunette from the rink…"

I went temporarily numb.

Kenora was a small town but it wasn't _that_ small.

"Oh fuck me sideways." I mumbled and I caught Jaiden's smirk. "Do you ever turn your hormones off?"

"Nah, I haven't been able to find the off switch and don't plan on doing so any time soon." Jaiden smiled and shrugged, sitting on the sofa and looking at me as I paced the floor. "So Ashley," she finally said after a few minutes of silence, "she uh, looks so much different in real life then in pictures. Maybe because it's like, a decade or so later…"

I stopped and looked at her.

"Lucas says she's the girl from your photo album. She's convinced that she's Dylan's mom." The brunette teenager shrugged and gave me a sympathetic look. "She's pretty upset."

I sighed deeply and chewed on my bottom lip before glancing back up at the winding staircase. "I should go talk to her."

Jaiden slapped her knees as she stood up. "I told my parents I'd be home early anyway, plus I have homework," she pulled her hat on and patted my hand that was resting against the back of the couch, "it'll be okay. I'll see you in the morning for practice Coach."

"Better get that homework done." I warned her lightly with a smile and she blew me a kiss while exiting the house.

I turned off the TV and shut off all the lights before making my way to Lucas' room. I knocked on the door but there was no reply. "Luc, honey, can I come in?"

"Go. Away." Came the reply and I clutched the doorknob in my hand tightly, closing my eyes.

"Lucas, please?" I said as I turned the doorknob and pushed the door open slightly. I poked my head in to find her chin resting against her windowsill, staring out towards the lake that was in front of our house. I pushed the door closed behind me and made my way towards her, climbing on her bed and resting my chin against the same piece of wood. "Soon we'll be able to make the rink out in front of the dock." I whispered.

Lucas shrugged her shoulders and sniffled. "She's here, isn't she?"

Broken whispers from a broken Lucas one of the most heartbreaking sounds I'd ever hear.

"Baby," I turned to face her, resting my cheek against my hand, "I was going to tell you after movie night, I promise."

"She can't have her." Lucas growled in a protective tone. "She can't have Dylan!"

"Luc, sweetie…" I reached out to hold her and she pushed me away.

"No mom, she's not allowed. You can't let her!"

I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. "It's not really up to me, Lucas."

"_Ashley._" Lucas spit the name out as if it were poison. "It's her. Your friend from school, isn't it?"

I told you she was smarter than smart. She could piece puzzles together quicker than Carmen, Ryn and I put together.

I could only nod and she jumped off her bed. "You tell your friend that she isn't allowed to take _my _sister away from me."

I've never seen Lucas that upset before. She was fuming for an eleven year old and I tried to calm her down a little. "She's just here for some meetings that I know of," I said softly.

"That's crap!" Lucas cried.

"Lucas!" I snapped and frowned. "You do not need to talk to me like that or use words that offensive."

Lucas' eyes immediately softened before her small body fell to her bed, crying into her comforter. "I'm sorry." She whispered over and over again.

I rubbed her back and sighed heavily. "I'm not happy about this either baby," I pulled her onto my lap and brushed fingers through her blonde hair.

And I wasn't exactly happy about the situation I was blindly put into. I could understand _why _my father had chosen me but I would've liked to have been informed first. Lucas was my life now and to see her so shattered over just the news of it all, I couldn't imagine how she'd react once Ashley took her daughter home.

I thought about seeing Ashley again. Everyone around me was spotting her and I only managed to glance up at her ass. I should've known that was her.

"Lukey?" Dylan peered through the door, rubbing her sleepy eyes. "Are you okay?" She came into the room and sat beside me on the bed, rubbing her small hand over Lucas' back.

Lucas sniffled and dried her eyes before climbing off my lap and hugging Dylan tightly.

"Hey," I softly whispered, placing a hand on both of their shoulders, "who wants ice cream?"

Lucas smiled and nodded, grabbing Dylan's hand. "Are you sure you're okay?" I heard Dylan ask as they rounded the corner and towards the staircase.

I threw myself back on the small bed and groaned out loudly. I realized I had a headache.

I was starting to feel just as angry as Lucas looked. I tried to understand it.

I guess I would've felt differently if my own daughter wasn't involved and on the verge of a heartache.

And how would Dylan react?

I loved her as if she were my own. I treated her as if she were my own. She had curfews and had to have her homework done after school. She had a bed time and I made sure she was well fed and cleaned up at all times.

I made her feel loved.

I couldn't put any blame on Ashley. Not until I heard the whole story. I wasn't angry at her anymore. Hurt, yes – angry, no.

So many questions ran through my mind and I knew I'd search for every single answer.

Even if I had to force myself to talk to Alex again.

I get it wasn't her secret to tell.

But was it really a secret?

Did Ashley not want me to know about her child?

Her beautiful little girl who stole my heart the moment I laid eyes on her?

It was a different kind of love but it was just as strong as when I met her mother.

//

"_You don't have to drive me home," she bit her lip, "I can have Aunt Greta pick me up when she's finished."_

_"Nonsense!" I laughed and stood up, throwing enough money on the table for both of our meals. "My treat so no arguing," I raised an eyebrow at her as she began to protest. "So if you don't mind coming with me to pick up a mask, we can call it a night . . ."_

_Ashley nodded and tucked a strand of dark hair behind her ear. "That'd be wise," she looked at me with a quirky smile, "somehow I don't think it'd be wise to hang out with me when your boyfriend already asked you to be with him."_

_Damn. Damn her. She was right but damn. I sighed inwardly, disappointed at the situation. I would've love to spend the rest of this cool fall evening with this gorgeous brunette, but of course she had to have some sort of sense to her. "Yea, you're right. I do have that thing called homework."_

_"And the brutal 5am wake up calls," she smarted off, sticking her perfect tongue out at me._

_"Watch it with that thing, it could get bitten off," I laughed as we got into my CRV. She looked at me while laughing and shook her head. I really said that, didn't I? I blushed._

_After grabbing my mask from the sports store, Ashley and I made our way back out into the parking lot. I squealed when tiny snowflakes fell from the light grey sky above. "I love the first snow fall!" I danced around the empty parking lot, my head towards the sky and twirled._

_Ashley laughed and though she didn't join me in my twirls, she stood there with her hands in her pockets and looked up at the sky, almost with a relaxed look on her face. "Snow is wonderful," she grinned, "and cold. Can we get into the vehicle now before I freeze my boobs off?"_

_I snickered and quickly opened her side of the door before running to mine. I turned on the heater and watched as Ashley rubbed her hands together in front of the heat. "Please tell me you brought some winter clothes with you?"_

_She snarled playfully. "I didn't know snow would come this quickly. My stuff is still in the process of being shipped." She pouted adorably and I wanted nothing more than to reach my fingers out and trace her full lips._

_"Well in the mean time, here," I threw some gloves and a hat at her from my back seat._

_She looked at me with that warm smile again. "Thank you," she whispered softly and I felt my insides begin to melt again._

_"Well, I guess we should get you home." I steered out of the parking lot and carefully made my way to Aiden's. I was happy to see that they had yet to arrive home so I wouldn't have to deal with him that evening. Somehow I think it'd ruin the good mood his beautiful cousin put me in._

_"Thank you for spending the evening with me and feeding me," Ashley smiled and opened the car door._

_"Thank you for pointing out my gay tendencies," I joked and cleared my throat, "I really had a good time." My voice went a little too serious but she didn't seem to mind. She winked and bit her lip._

_"I have a funny feeling you and I, Carlin, are going to get along just fine. I already fell in like with you, who knows what's next?" With that, she was out of my vehicle and running into the house, she looked back briefly and waved with the biggest smile on her face._

_One that definitely matched my own._

_Great Carlin, what the hell did you get yourself into?_

//

That was the very moment I knew Ashley and I were "meant" to be.

What that "meant" was, I was hoping I'd figure it out.

But first, I wanted to put the girls ahead of us.

Me.

Her.

**Us.**

-\-/-

_Hang in there! **Chapter 22** is the big one with a Spashley reuinion!_


	23. Blanked And Shattered

Second update of the day.

_**So I just wanted to clear something up with the chapter situation. I did mean Chapter 22 but my Chapter 22, not that actual chapters this site is showing. So although it says Chapter 23, look at mine and you'll see it's Chapter 20. I do some in parts therefore it sets back my chapter numbers. Sorry for the confusion but hopefully it all makes sense now! I don't own SoN. And hopefully I'll be able to give you two chapters tomorrow where you can finally have your Spashley reunion!!**_

**20 - Blanked & Shattered**

**Ashley's PoV**

"You really have a lot of nerve showing up here," I said in a whispered breath, not budging the hotel door open any further.

"I bumped my studio time up," Alex cleared her throat and she chewed on part of her nail, "I think it's best I just go until the air clears a bit."

"Don't do me any favours." I hissed.

"Ash, please just listen to me!" She leaned against the doorframe and clutched it with her hand. "Spencer lives here."

"I know." I sighed. "Alex, please…" I closed my eyes. "God I don't even know what to think right now. I have so much to process in my tiny brain that I'm just not in the mood to cram it all in right now." I looked at her and squared my jaw, "I came here to get my daughter back and the moment you knew it was possible, you tried to discourage me, why?"

If anything, I just wanted to know that reason. She was my best friend for years and she harboured big things from me.

Lucas Carlin.

Granted it wasn't her thing to tell me but still, I was selfish and would've liked to have known that my ex had an almost teeny bopper running around.

Alex's eyes widened and she stammered over her words. "No! That's not-"

"Alex." I pulled her into the room, when I noticed Chelsea's door open up. "I know what I heard back in Thunder Bay."

"No!" Alex pleaded and grabbed my hands into her cold ones. "I didn't mean for you to take it that way and now that I think about it, I would've too, but god," she grabbed at her perfect rock star hair and pulled, kicking the desk leg, "fuck it." She mumbled. "The only reason why I was saying that was because Dylan found a really good home here and," she took a deep breath, "I think that you'd approve and-"

"And I shouldn't bother?"

"No Goddamnit, just fucking listen to me!" Alex said in a frustrated tone and looked at me with darkened grey eyes. "My dad managed to get Dylan into proper care with the system here. He found the perfect person who would raise your daughter as if she were her own because she has one as well. He told me not to tell you," she blinked with unshed tears, "he thought it would be best if you didn't know during the time that you were getting better."

"I don't get it." I finally whispered, finally calm enough to hear her out. "Why would Mr. C do that?"

"He was protecting everyone." Alex whispered back. "I mean, everyone who was involved, including the woman taking care of Dylan."

She was speaking in riddles and it was driving me insane. "I'm really trying to keep my patience intact, Alexis Carlin."

"Okay, okay," she breathed and rubbed her forehead, "Spencer has a daughter as well and I know I should've mentioned it but I just, I didn't know how. I didn't want it to break your heart because-"

I stopped her with my hand. I could tell she was about to spill more but for some reason, I didn't want to hear it.

"Lucas Carlin?" I blinked and watched her nod.

"How did you know?"

"We um," I tried to keep my emotions intact as well, "we sort of met earlier. I was at Timmy's with Chelsea, my caseworker, and she was there with Jaiden."

"Oh." Alex looked down at her feet. "Oh."

"What does this have to do with Dylan?" I frowned again.

"Well," she took another deep breath and bit her bottom lip hard, "Dylan is under Spencer's care."

What was that sound? Oh yea, my heart hammering to the floor leaving all my nerve ends shot and scattered beneath me.

I blanked.

I stared at her blankly.

I didn't want anymore surprises and yet, that's all that was being offered to me.

I think I heard correctly.

Dylan was living with Spencer?

Small fucking world.

"Ash?" Alex's voice wavered and it wasn't until then that I realized I was crying.

Overwhelmed.

Scared.

Nauseous.

Relieved?

"You have to go." I said and pushed her towards the door.

Alex had been harbouring major secrets. Whether I was overreacting or not, it was still a slap in the face and a kick to the vag.

"What?" Alex panicked.

"I can't deal with you right now," I whispered and yanked open the door, "please Alex, just leave."

"Ash…"

"Leave!" I slammed the door in her face and slunk to the floor, my hands covering my mouth.

I don't remember going to sleep that night. I don't remember grabbing an old 'CARLIN' jersey from my suitcase and the 'Davies' hockey bear that I had given Dylan on her sixth birthday. The one Spencer gave me. But I woke up early the next morning to find myself tangled up in the article of clothing, drooling on the bear and the worn out school picture I had of Dylan in my hand. It was her school picture from her second grade and the most recent one I had.

I wasn't going to go anywhere at all the rest of that weekend.

How could I?

How could I possibly take away the one most important person to me from the other most important person to me?

-\-/-

**_I feel for Alex too, trust me. You'll see later on that she has some growing up to do but hopefully she'll grow into her likeable character once again. If not, well that's Alex for ya. Never was the definition of perfection._**


	24. Tomorrow, Tomorrow

**21 - Tomorrow, Tomorrow**

**Spencer's PoV**

"_So I was thinking,"_ Ryn's voice echoed through the phone, _"you shouldn't come to work today."_

Excuse me?

"What?" I frowned, munching on a bowl of Frosted Flakes. "I've got clients today too, you know!"

"_Spence,"_ she sighed loudly and I heard her munching on cereal as well, _"you know that it's not a good idea given your history with this woman."_

She was right.

But I didn't care.

"I need to work," I mumbled, "I can't just sit around the house all day. Tracey already cleaned it spotless before her and whatsherface took off last night."

"_Real mature,"_ I could hear Ryn's eyes roll, _"whatsherface? She's your sister and she has a name!"_

I swallowed the last spoonful and threw my bowl into the sink. "Girls?!" I covered the phone and yelled upstairs. "If you don't come down here right now I'm eating the last of the Flakes dude!"

I smirked when footsteps came echoing loudly down the stairs and they both jumped on the stools, looking at me with wide eyes and opened mouths. I snickered and poured them each a small glass of orange juice and a bowl of cereal.

"_Are you going to comment on the mature thing?"_ Ryn asked.

"No." I muttered.

"_Okay,"_ she huffed, _"well back on the work subject."_

I looked at the girls and smiled, dismissing myself from them, making my way to the back study room. "Ryn, I have a huge meeting and I really don't want to miss it."

"_Spence, you can reschedule."_

"Look, I won't leave my office unless I absolutely have to but this meeting cannot be rescheduled." I insisted. "It's already been cancelled twice from the other party."

"_Stay in your office and don't you dare come near mine."_ Ryn scolded me and I smiled.

She was just protecting me.

She knew I couldn't get much more involved than I already was, without bringing personal feelings into it all.

I knew that as well.

"See you later, Ryn." I said softly.

"_Later, __**way**__ later!"_ Ryn's voice could be heard before I hung up on her.

I made my way back in the kitchen and found Dylan packing up her school bag. She looked up at me and smiled. "Can I join hockey?"

Lucas grinned and smiled at me while packing her own bag with her homework. "I think she's ready!"

I didn't want to get her hopes up high just in case.

I wasn't sure what was going to happen _when _Ashley took Dylan back into her own care.

"How about you come to practice with Lucas tomorrow night, we'll get you geared up and see how things go." I smiled and Dylan squealed, giving Luc a high five. "Now get your boots and coats on, it's school time."

--

**Ashley's PoV**

I noticed her name on the wall with the list of offices.

**Spencer D. Carlin – Office A2**.

She always said if she couldn't play hockey for the rest of her life, she'd get into this type of environment. Spencer was good with people and children. I could only imagine just how good she treated Dylan and how perfect she raised her own daughter.

I always believed in her.

"Miss Davies?" I heard a smooth voice behind me and I spun around to find myself standing in front of a beautiful redhead. "Hi, I'm Kathryn Michaels, how are you this morning?"

I smiled and nodded, clearly and visibly nervous.

My future wasn't in my hands at this point.

I knew Kathryn was my executioner at this point. She'd be the one to give the verdict if she saw me fit to see my daughter. Her word meant the world to me and I hoped that I deemed myself worthy enough of her approval.

"Kinda nervous," I admitted and wiped my hand on my nice black slacks before shaking her hand. "You can call me Ashley."

"Ashley," Kathryn dipped her head politely and eyed up Carter and Chelsea, signalling them to follow us, "so I've read over your file and I've got to say, I've seen a lot worse," she shut the door behind us and moved behind her desk.

I tried not to show any signs of emotions.

I really did just want to cry.

"It's really good to see you bounce back the way you have." Kathryn kept her head down while she eyed up something in a folder. "It says you checked yourself back into rehab a day after you were released to ensure that you were ready to face the world again."

I nodded, swallowing hard.

"Ashley has shown remarkable progress since last year," Carter spoke up and smiled at me, "she has been through every program willingly and I would bet a life's worth of salary that she hasn't even touched alcohol since being out."

Kathryn's green eyes sparkled and she folded her hands neatly in front of her on the desk. "I'm very happy to hear that," she addressed me and then looked through the file more before closing it and glancing between Chelsea and I. "Dylan is a very bright young lady."

I widened my eyes and bit my lip. "You know her?"

Kathryn only smiled and laughed softly. "I don't have any reason to deny you visitation rights with your daughter. I'm not the court of law but I can guarantee you that with the help you've gotten and the drive you've shown, you have nothing to worry about. I still have some questions to ask you but in the mean time," she looked over at Carter, "Mr. Carter, will you give her the good news?"

I looked at Carter, nearly sitting at the edge of my seat, hands clamping down on the armrests.

"Well," he shifted himself towards me and leaned forward, "I've been over your case with pretty much all who needed to be involved at the courthouse and after careful review and investigation, they really don't see you as a threat or harmful in any way. They are under the awareness that you made a mistake and took full responsibility for your actions. They deem you worthy of seeing Dylan again as soon as possible. It's really good to see the system recognize that you sought the help you needed in order to get your daughter back."

Did he just say what I thought he said?

As soon as possible?

I was so close I could taste it.

I think I wanted to faint a little.

"We all want you to see that little girl back in your arms," Chelsea spoke for the first time since being in the room, "but I think Miss Michaels would have to agree with me that before you reunite with Dylan, we should set up a meeting with Miss Carlin."

Did she just what I thought she said?

Meet with Miss Carl-

I mean, Spencer?

"And seeing as she works in this building," Kathryn smiled, "it wouldn't be hard to pencil you in."

I could only nod.

There goes my dry mouth again.

Carter offered me a sip of his water and I gladly accepted. He thought it was just nerves.

But it was so much more.

I watched as Kathryn picked up the phone and dialled an extension number. "Spencer, it's Kathryn, are you busy?" She smiled at me and held up one finger to say she needed a minute. "Well the meeting with Miss Davies went well. We need to set up a meeting between the both of you as soon as possible." I watched as her face went slack, like a look of sorrow fell upon her features. "I know Spence," she whispered, "I know."

A flash of realization flashed through me and I gasped quietly. Spencer had to know who I was. She had to know that Dylan was my daughter.

What was she feeling?

Did she know all along?

Did Alex not tell her either?

"Tomorrow before lunch sounds perfect." Kathryn said her goodbyes on the phone and hung up, facing me again. "So Spencer is able to meet with you tomorrow around eleven."

Chelsea was the first to stand up and shake the woman's hand.

I think I did too.

Tomorrow, I'd be face to face with Spencer for the first time in twelve years.

Tomorrow, I'd be faced with my most painful regret and mistake.

Tomorrow, I'd learn to live again.

-\-/-

_Ahh, can you taste Spashley on the tip of your tongue? The reunion I mean! Heh. Thank you!_


	25. You Too

_Drum roll please...... and I don't own Son!_

**22 - You Too**

**Spencer's PoV**

Lucas went with Jaiden to Rapture for a couple of hours. She wanted Dylan to go with her but I had told her I needed time with the small brunette to talk about tomorrow's meeting. My nerves were already shot and when Lucas slammed the front door behind her, it only made it worse.

Lucas had an immediate grudge against Ashley and in her eleven year old mind, I couldn't blame her really. Her greatest friend ever was slowly being yanked from her grasp and she had no control over it.

"I'm done." Dylan came out of the downstairs bathroom in her pyjama bottoms and a hoodie with her hair still damp. She liked to bath in the evenings after dinner. It was a cute quirk. "I'm excited about playing hockey with Lucas tomorrow."

I smiled as she curled up against me on the couch. Her dark curls still dripping from the excess water. I got up and grabbed a towel, gently towel drying her hair. She looked so much like Ashley.

How could I have not seen it before?

"Hey," I began in a whisper and threw the towel towards the kitchen floor.

I'd pick it up later.

"I have good news for you," I continued and settled back down on the couch. I took a deep breath and her brown eyes waited patiently for me to continue, "I'll be meeting with your mom tomorrow-"

"Really?!?!" Dylan screamed with a high pitched voice and she was bouncing on the floor in two seconds flat. "Really Spencer? Really?"

I had to smile at the excitement in her voice. I had come to the conclusion that with the way Dylan's eyes lit up every time she shared a memory about Ashley, I knew deep down Ashley couldn't have let her daughter get caught up in the system on purpose.

"Really." I smiled and pulled her to sit down before I sank to my knees and clasped her small hands in mine. "It's just a meeting between us grown-ups at first okay? Your mom is able to ask my any questions about you..." I paused, "is there anything you would like me to tell her?"

"I love her and I miss her." Dylan's eyes dropped to my hands that held hers before casting her brown eyes back on mine. "And that you're the best second mom any kid could ask for." She threw her arms around my neck and squeezed me tight.

It took everything in me not to break down just then.

Dylan Davies was definitely like a daughter to me.

I didn't want to see her leave the family.

"I can do that." I whispered when she tucked her head in my neck, never loosening her grip.

"When can I see her?" Dylan finally pulled back and the look on her face looked worrisome; like she had to wait another year to see her mother.

"Let's see how tomorrow goes," I smiled back softly, "I'm sure by the weekend, you'll be able to see her again."

Dylan had the biggest smile on her face and she squirmed around, showing how giddy she was. "Do you think she will like you?"

"M-me?" I stammered a bit.

"Well yea," Dylan ducked her head sheepishly, "my mommy likes girls like you do. It'd be cool to have my two favourite mommies be my real mommies." She got up off the couch and kissed my cheek before making her way up to her room.

I sat there, replying her words in my head.

"**Do you think she will like you?"**

"She used to love me." I whispered to no one.

--

"You look fine!" Carmen shook her head with a knowing smile. "In fact, you look fu-"

"Don't finish that sentence." I hissed, staring back at her outside my office door.

"I was _going_ to say fucktastic," Carmen leaned forward with a smirk, "but fuckable works too."

"God not now Mandez," I frowned and she backed off. I wasn't in the mood to play games.

"Fine," she held her hands up and backed away, "did you want to have lunch? I want to hear the details."

"This meeting is confidential," Ryn came up to us, placing a hand on Carmen's shoulder, "Sorry Carmen."

Carmen eyed up the redhead and shrugged. "Ryn, how come we never hooked up?"

"Because," Ryn blew on her nails before looking back at the raven haired woman, "you're lacking an extension."

"Oh but baby, I have one in the drawer of my night stand. Many different ones in fact. Different colours, shapes, sizes-"

"Carmen!" I hissed and she raised a perfectly sculpted eyebrow. "She's as straight as they come, just leave her alone." I turned to find Ryn's face slightly red with embarrassment and then looked back at Carmen. "You're not helping me any so just go."

"God Carlin, when you're so wound up it's such a turn on." Carmen kissed my cheek and squeezed my hand while turning the moment serious. "I'm here for you though, I promise, okay?" Her statement held truthfully in her eyes. "Call me if you want that lunch."

"Wow," Ryn watched Carmen walk away, "get her, Sammy and Jaiden in the same room, I'd be afraid I'd turn gay with their excessive flirting and dirty minds."

I chuckled and opened my office door. "You really don't know what you're missing." I sighed and shook my head playfully at her.

"I think I do." Ryn smiled and shrugged. "I slept with my college roommate and though it was great, it still doesn't compare to the guys I've been with."

"Ugh." I gagged. The last guy I let touch me got me knocked up. I think I slept with so many women since then to try and wash away the guilt from doing it in the first place. But he gave me Lucas so I wasn't about to call it the biggest mistake of my life by any means.

I sorted out my files on my desk for my afternoon appointments and noticed Ryn standing in the doorway, smiling softly at me. "She's really beautiful, Spence."

I played blonde.

I was good at it.

Paula said so.

"Who?" I looked away from her and felt my best friend move closer to me.

"Ashley Davies." She said her name with such ease. Like it was the most natural thing in the world to her.

"I know this," I said quietly and cleared my throat before glancing back up her, "I dated the girl for nearly nine months and we were engaged for two of them."

Ryn blinked and looked at me. "I still can't believe it was only nine months. The way you talk about her, you'd think it would be at least a couple of years!"

"Truth is," I licked my lips and shrugged, "I've never gotten over her. I guess that's why this meeting is a lot harder than it should be."

Ryn and I both glanced up at the clock and then the buzzer to my speaker phone rang. "Miss Carlin, you're eleven o'clock is here. Should I send her in?"

Ryn's eyes widened and nodded. "I'm just going to grab my papers and I'll be back."

"Send her in." I tried to keep my voice calm.

Tried.

I nervously brushed down my baby blue blouse down and straightened the collar a bit. I heard voices coming from the hallway, getting closer.

The closer they got, the more nervous I became.

Then the knock at the door happened.

I glanced up to find myself looking into those eyes again.

Those eyes that carried me through my senior year in high school safely.

Those eyes that spoke to me with so much love every time she used to touch me.

Those eyes that still sparkled with a little life.

And they were gone.

She was glancing down at the floor.

"Feel free to have a seat," I finally spoke.

I couldn't believe those were the first words that came out of my mouth to her. It had been over twelve years and that was all I could say?

Maybe keeping this meeting professional would help ease the tension in the air.

The unspoken tension.

"Miss Carlin, this is Ashley Davies," a darker woman smiled and I nodded, finding Ashley's eyes back on mine.

I leaned over my desk and held out my hand, watching in slow motion as Ashley's darkened hand took mine gently, grasping with her fingers with just enough tension so that I could feel her. Our eyes remained locked.

Her hand felt slightly calloused but still soft as ever.

I cleared my throat and let go of her light grip.

"It's good to see you." I whispered so quietly I thought she didn't hear me.

But her eyes widened slightly and then relaxed.

"You too." Her husky voice replied. I never realized how much I missed her voice until then.

Two words.

It wasn't much.

But it was a start.

And the beginning was just the start of something beautiful.

--


	26. Welcome To Dylan's New World

_Sorry I made you all wait for these last couple updates. Hopefully I'll be back on track with the daily updates! Thank you all for reading and reviewing! Makes my day/night complete._

**23 - Welcome To Dylan's New World**

**Ashley's PoV**

I never really had a chance to glance around Spencer's office the moment I walked in. She looked breathtaking and pretty much stole my attention in her buttoned up shirt and black slacks. She looked so healthy and strong.

Unlike me.

I was still a little smaller than usual – food wasn't my best friend in those dark days. I was still putting fat back on my body so I could build muscle.

But Spencer looked very good.

Her eyes were the same colour as they always were but with a hint of greyish tones that she never had before.

Chelsea introduced us, knowing full well that I knew who Spencer was, but kept it professional.

I couldn't help but take a hold of the hand that was held in front of me.

I swallowed but fought my urge to look away.

"It's nice to see you." Spencer whispered and I couldn't help but look surprised.

She wasn't mad?

She wasn't screaming at me?

"You too." I said in the same volume she used.

"Well," Chelsea took the lead and pushed a chair out for me. I took the seat and finally, _finally_ looked down at the frames that scattered across her 'homely' office.

I felt myself choke up at the most recent picture of Dylan. The front of her hair was pulled back with the exception of a few loose curls that framed her face. She was smiling widely for the camera and I've never seen her so happy. It was her recent school picture. I glanced at the frame beside it with another school picture. Only it was the blonde girl from Tim Hortons the other night. Grey eyes and long wavy blonde hair with her skin as dark as Dylan's. She was beautiful.

Like her mother.

"So you're welcome to ask any questions," Kathryn came into the room, "Spencer would be happy to answer all that she can regarding Dylan's stay with her."

I bit my lip and glanced down at my worn down fingernails. I've gotten into the habit of biting them when I was nervous. Chelsea nudged me after I was so quiet for so long. I was lost in thought with everything that had happened since graduation day. I looked up and Spencer's eyes studied me with carefulness. "Is she happy?" I asked.

Spencer's let out a soft smile. "She is," she leaned forward and played with the pen that was in her hand, "she told me to tell you that she loves you and she misses you."

I shared a look with Chelsea and she squeezed my hand.

I had so many questions floating around in my head. The problem was that I couldn't think of one single one to ask.

I was overwhelmed.

I was so happy that I was one step closer to getting Dylan and I was so happy that I wasn't throwing up with excitement.

I wanted to ask Spencer how she was. If she was happy. But something stopped me. I told myself that it wasn't time.

I'd make time.

But not now.

The meeting was kind of a blur. I hate to say it but I don't remember what exactly was said. I watched her lips moves as she spoke.

Grown-up Spencer was hotter than high school Spencer.

The reason I found her hotter is because she seemed comfortable in her own skin. She always had but seeing as how her hockey career was ripped from her, she held it together pretty good. Look at the life she made for herself.

I heard her voice again and glanced towards her eyes. They were focused on Chelsea. "So Ashley can see Dylan as long as she's supervised?"

Great, she thinks I was going to runaway with my daughter.

"For now we see that it's best until the final case is taken to the court. After Ashley has her hearing, it'll be a different story." Chelsea patted my hand and I smiled sadly.

It wasn't over yet but I think I was right where I wanted to be.

"Oh well," Spencer cleared her throat and looked straight at me, "it's just that Dylan's having her first practice with a hockey team tonight and I really think it's something her mother should be included in."

Oh my fucking wow.

Dylan in hockey? Spencer wanting me to be there?

I glanced over at Chelsea quickly, hoping that I was giving my best pleading look without being too obvious.

"I have the phone conference tonight," she sighed and gave me an apologetic look.

I couldn't even hide the disappointment from my face, looking back down towards the floor. My heart continued to beat hard against my chest, so hard it was beginning to hurt.

I wanted to cry.

Or be sick again. That happened a lot when I was overexcited or overwhelmed. I was told it was a side effect of some sort.

"Well I'm free for a bit," I heard Kathryn speak up and smile at Spencer, "I wouldn't mind escorting Miss Davies to the rink."

"Thank you." Spencer and I both said at the same time. Our gazes locked again and she gave me a smile, nodding. "You'll be proud. She's been practicing like crazy for the past three months. I wasn't sure if you wanted-"

"I wanted." I didn't let her finish the sentence. "I want everything for her." I said in another whisper.

Spencer swallowed and nodded her head once again, with a warmer smile.

"Okay so," Chelsea closed her notebook and stood up, "it was very nice of you to meet with us on very short notice Miss Carlin, thank you."

"It wasn't a problem." Her eyes glanced briefly towards Chelsea's then back at me. "I'll see you tonight."

Whoa there heart, keep inside the body. It felt as if it wanted to jump into Spencer's hand and melt all over again.

She was being so nice and calm and making me feel more comfortable than I thought possible.

Of course I thought about the scenarios of how we'd meet after our break up in high school. But being in her office trying to be the one getting my daughter back, wasn't one of them.

Spencer rounded her desk corner and gingerly grabbed the frame on her desk of Dylan. She handed it to me and I barely trusted my shaky hands to take it from her without dropping it. "I have more." She whispered.

I glanced down at the frame that was now in my deathly grip. "You don't have too…"

"I said I have more," Spencer said and stepped back a bit, keeping her distance. "For you."

I guess it was gravity doing its natural thing.

Bringing us together.

Or was it fate?

Either way, my heart was home.

And the moment I got to see Dylan…

…I'd be complete.

--

**Dylan's PoV**

School was fun like always. I loved to learn new things but mainly I loved recess.

I got to be outside and play with Lucas and her other friends.

They were nice too me. They were nice because Lukey would threaten to beat them up otherwise.

I loved her.

She was my sister. I've never had a sister but I think that's what a sister would do; except for Spencer and Alex. They are sisters but seem to fight a lot lately. I hated seeing Spencer sad.

For once though, I couldn't wait until school was out. I wanted to go home, do my homework and then play hockey with a real team.

A real team!

Lucas' team.

With Spencer as our Coach.

I loved Spencer too. She's been really nice to me. She likes to watch movies with us just like Lukey promised me when we first met. She also holds me when I cry and never says that I'm bad for doing so.

One house I was at, I'd get smacked across the mouth for whimpering. I didn't understand how grownups could be so mean. I was never allowed to attend school and stayed at the house, cleaning everyone else's mess.

It wasn't until Spencer took me in, did I begin to feel like I was at home again.

With my mommy.

I loved my mommy. I missed her so much. She would play games with me every time she'd finish writing one of her pretty songs. She'd dance around my bedroom with me before bed time and tuck me in with one kiss to each eyelid and then on each cheek. She would sing me back to sleep if I woke up with a nightmare.

I didn't understand why I wasn't allowed to see her anymore. After we crashed into a tree, I never saw her again.

"Dyl!" Lucas smiled at me when we finally reached the outside stairs of the school. "Did you want to beg mom to let us go for ice cream after practice?"

I nodded enthusiastically. I loved going to Rapture. Ephiny and Chase were nice and Jaiden always made me feel special. It was no wonder Lucas had a crush on her – but she'd deny it if you teased her.

"Cool." She grinned goofily and took my hand, making our way towards the fence, waiting for Spencer to pick us up.

A horn honked and we swung our heads to the left to see Spencer waving at us from down the street. "Last one to the car has to help with dishes!" I sang as I took off ahead of her.

"No fair, you're small!" Lucas cried, "the wind carries you!"

I chuckled as I tagged the vehicle first.

"Hey ladies," Spencer smiled and opened the door for us, taking our bags as we climbed in the back seat, "how was school?"

"Long."

"Boring."

Spencer smiled and threw our bags in the front seat on Carmen's lap. I always thought that was her girlfriend but Lucas said they were just really close. She said Spencer never really dated.

I think that meant she never had a girlfriend.

Or something.

I was nine.

I just wanted to play hockey.

Like Lucas.

"Did you see her?" I asked, leaning forward a bit. Carmen glanced back at me and I kept my eyes on blue eyes in the review mirror.

"I did," Spencer smiled softly.

"Does she like you?" I asked excitedly.

Lucas scoffed.

"I'm sure she does." Carmen smiled back at me.

"When can I see her?" I asked a little more excitedly, my hands clasping tightly in my lap.

"We're going to set up a time tomorrow," Spencer smiled.

I couldn't wait. I sat back in my seat and rubbed my hands together. I looked over at Lucas, who was staring out her window. "Isn't this great Luc? I can see my mom soon!"

Lucas shrugged. I patted her knee and she turned her head to smile at me. "It's great, Dyl." She finally whispered.

I swallowed when tears started to fall freely from her eyes. She squeezed my hand and then glanced back out her window.

The rest of the ride home was silent.

--


	27. Don't Thank Me

**Flashbacks are in **_italics._

This short flashback was taken from **Wash It All Away: Chapter 59.1 – **_**Stripping The Surface**_

I don't own **SoN. **Thank you all for the lovely reviews and reading. I'm doing a lot of different PoV's this time around because of an idea I have in the future. Plus, it'll give you a chance to see what goes on behind Spashley's (Salex's) back. Hope you don't mind!

**24 - Don't Thank Me**

**Ashley's PoV**

_I pulled back and smiled shyly, my fingers began to play with the buttons on her shirt. "Spencer?" _

_She looked at me and sighed with love. She was simply breathtaking. "Ashley?" Spencer grinned and I shook my head, chuckling._

"_I was thinking," I took a deep breath, "maybe sometime in the future we could move?"_

"_Move?" Spencer settled on top of me more comfortably and smiled. "Like, where?"_

"_Well I was doing some research and I thought maybe we can move where I proposed to you." I ducked her head shyly and bit her bottom lip._

_Talking about the future was definitely a good sign. "Of course." She whispered and cupped my face. "Anywhere you wanna go."_

//

The whistle blew and I watched the skaters on the ice started to skate around the ice.

"So I heard all about you," Kathryn smiled as she leaned into me a bit, "Spencer spilled everything about why she found herself in Kenora."

I blinked and looked at her. A complete stranger knew everything about me yet I knew nothing about her. Or Spencer for that matter. Not anymore anyway.

"You proposed to her here and made it home to her. I guess you made it safe for her somehow, that maybe you'd come back to her here." She blew a few red strands of hair from her eyes and looked at me with a soft look. "She adored you."

I closed my eyes and kicked my feet in front of me. My hands dug into the seat I was sitting in. I was allowed to see Dylan but I wasn't allowed communication just yet. That killed me but getting to see her practice on the ice was a big deal and it meant the world to me that Spencer even offered it.

She didn't have too.

But she did.

"Does she go by Avery or Davies?" I asked, ignoring the woman's last comment.

I honestly didn't have an answer for her. I thought of Spencer every day and aside from the women I slept with during my drug addiction, no one else touched me. But no one held me the way that woman had.

Was it possible to be hung up on someone you hadn't seen in twelve years?

Must be.

"Davies." Kathryn smiled. "Dylan didn't seem to bat an eyelash, kind of like she knew the name."

Dylan knew her grandparents' last names were Davies.

"Carlin!" I heard her voice ring through the arena, echoing off the walls. I watched as Spencer knelt down to be eye level at her daughter's height. She was smiling and then patted her shoulder, telling her to stand beside…

…

Dylan.

Dylan had her helmet off and her hair was longer than I expected. The waves in her hair were natural and it was such a beautiful sight. I think I was tearing up a little. She was dressed in her hockey gear and stood straight, like she was proud to be on that ice.

I watched as Lucas whispered something in her ear and they erupted into a fit of giggles.

"Do I have to separate you two?" Spencer held her hand on her hip and I had to snort a little. She made one hot mother.

"They always get like this," Kathryn smiled, "when Spencer's coaching the older team, Luc and Dylan are usually always giggling about something, making the players lose concentration with their uber cuteness."

I believed it.

"Sorry Coach!" Lucas cleared her throat.

Spencer continued on telling them who was on what team and before long, the small game was on its way.

Watching them out on the ice took me back to when I used to sneak in and watch Spencer play her games whenever she was in Vancouver or wherever else she happened to be playing. No one knew that I kept up with her career.

I got to witness Dylan's fast skating skills. She was the smallest on the team but she seemed to be the fastest, aside from Lucas.

"Dylan!" Screamed the smaller blonde as the puck was shot towards my daughter and then shot to Lucas, who scored on the goalie.

"Damn, good tag team." I whispered and Kathryn smiled, nodding.

It wasn't long before Spencer blew the whistle again, gathering the team back to the middle of the ice. Coach Carlin gave instructions on their next practice before their next game. I strained my ears a bit to listen to what she was saying, "-don't think they stand a chance against us. With the newest addition to our team," she patted Dylan's sweaty head, "we've got the best team and we're going to deliver!"

A bunch of hoots and hollers came from the team before they let out a fierce "rawr!". The team was Legion Lions.

"I know how badly you want to talk to her," the redhead sighed, "but just a couple more days."

"No, I know," I sat back, "it just means a lot that you offered to bring me here, thank you."

She stood up and smiled, shrugging a bit. "Spencer wanted you here. I couldn't let down my best friend."

Best friend? Wow. So she did know Dylan a lot more than she let on.

"Besides," Kathryn continued, "Dylan and you both deserved to share this together."

"Thanks Kathryn."

"Eh," I heard someone come up the stairs, "call her Ryn, Kathryn makes her sound old and I do not hang out with old people." Spencer stood there in her Coach jacket with a whistle around her neck and hair pulled back.

I stumbled back a bit and cleared my throat. I wasn't expecting her to come up here at all. I stared at her and she just tilted her head slightly with a small smile.

"I'll have you know that Kathryn is very _mature_," the redhead frowned, "unlike _Spencer_."

I smiled a little when Spencer raised an eyebrow. It felt nice that she wasn't acting funny around me.

I wish I could say the same.

I mean, everything was thrown at me in a matter of forty-eight hours and I'm standing next to _her_ – my ex-fiancée, the one person's heart I broke when I promised her I wouldn't.

And she's smiling at me.

"I think I'm going to start the car," _Ryn _said and glanced between us two before heading down the stairs from the announcers box.

I silently begged her to stay but she was already gone.

I was very aware that the gorgeous blonde was standing there beside me, looking down at the empty rink below. "So uh," I cleared my throat, swallowed hard, "thank you for mentioning this to me."

Because she didn't have too.

We locked eyes and my air was stolen from my lungs. "I remember when Lucas started to play hockey," I saw the smile in her eyes, "her first practice was just the beginning of it all and if Dylan has as much passion for hockey as she says, you deserved to be here to witness where it all unfolds."

"Thank you." I whispered again.

She shook her head. "Don't thank me please, it was just," she sighed, "Dylan would be happy to know you're here."

"But I can't see her." The sadness in my voice wasn't lost on her.

"No, not yet." She chewed on her bottom lip before pulling out something from her back pocket. "But soon Ashley," she handed me the folded paper, "soon."

I blinked and she was gone.

Spencer made her way back down the stairs and I stood there, flicking my eyes from the paper in my hands to the retreating form walking away from me.

I unfolded the kraft paper and there was a drawing of two stick figures, holding hands underneath a bridge. One short girl and one taller girl. I cried when I read the title: I miss you, mommy.

I missed you too, baby Dyl.

--

_Things may seem a little "calm" atm between Spencer and Ashley, but they'll get into more heated discussion, no worries. Aside from that, enjoy the ride because Spashley has finally made it home. Thank you!_


	28. I Always Think Of You

**25 - I Always Think Of You**

**Flashbacks in **_italics_

This flashback was taken from **Wash It All Away – Chapter 1: **_**I Think…I Think I Like Girls**_

**Spencer's PoV**

"You look so…" Sammy tried to find a word and she shrugged, stumped.

"I figured you'd be happy to see her again," Carmen spoke up, scooping out a spoonful of vanilla ice cream from our second tub that sat between the three of us at Rapture's.

"I am but," I sighed and pressed my fingers against my temple, "she looks so lost and sad. It breaks my heart."

"Well she's been through a lot," Sammy sighed, "I mean not that I know the whole story."

I eyed her up, wondering if I should take my chances and ask her everything she knew about Ashley and Dylan. I wanted too.

I so wanted too.

But I couldn't.

"Spence," Sammy licked her lips, "Ashley never wanted to keep Dylan a secret from you. Not intentionally anyway. She figured Alex would've said something."

"Not that it was Alex's place anyway," Carmen shrugged.

"What do you mean?" Sammy gasped and I raised my eyebrows between the two. "I think Alex could've said 'hey Spence, guess what? Ashley's happy and knocked herself up.'"

I had to chuckled cause that sounded ridiculous. Then I stopped laughing.

Huh?

Knocked herself up?

"Shit." The brunette muttered and I tilted my head slightly. She sighed heavily and looked around the semi-busy café. "Ashley never slept with a guy," she whispered, "she um, she went and got the sperm thingy planted inside of her. It was her choice."

Oh.

Wow.

Man, I felt like a total…

Slut.

"Really?" Carmen asked in wonder. "Wow, where was that Ashley Davies twelve years ago, right?"

"Carmen!" Sammy punched her arm, earning a yelp. "You're so fucking insensitive sometimes."

"Bitch, I didn't mean it like that and she knew it!" Carmen barked back. "I was the one who stood by Spencer's side through everything when everyone else was doing their own thing. I would never rub that back in her face."

Carmen was kind of hot pissed. Just saying.

Sammy frowned and leaned over, pressing her lips to the woman's cheek. "I'm sorry."

I think that shocked the raven haired hockey player. "Uh, it-it's cool. Didn't hurt. Carlin hits harder than you on a bad day."

Sammy smirked and then looked back at me. "I would've been there for you Spence," she scratched her neck slightly, "but I was trying to track down my own girlfriend back then." The table went quiet but Sammy shook her head. "I'm so over her, you have no idea."

"So back to Spashley," Carmen smiled and patted my hand. "When are you seeing her again?"

"Well she's back in with Ryn tomorrow and I work so…" I smiled a little, "I'll probably run into her again."

"Don't you feel any pain?" Carmen frowned. "I mean, that's the woman who left you high and dry Spencer – she took your heart with her."

I pondered that for a moment and nodded, partially agreeing with her. "But she came back," I mused, "maybe it's only because of Dylan but I think …" I trailed off when I noticed Chelsea and Ashley walk in when the chimes sounded above the door.

I was glad the girls were with Jaiden back at the house.

Carmen spun around to look at what I was staring at. "Holy Jesus," she whispered and turned slowly back towards me. "Kiss me!"

"What?!" I hissed. Why the hell would I do that?

"It'll make her jealous!" Carmen hissed back.

"This isn't high school you fucknut," I shook my head.

"Wow," Sammy was the first to rise out of her seat, "Ashley Davies," she engulfed the brunette in a hug, "you're looking really good."

I was the second to get out of the booth and cleared my throat. "You ladies want to join us?"

Chelsea smiled. "Actually we're just picking up a take out," she rubbed her hand up and down Ashley's arm, who remained quiet.

"Cat got your tongue there pussycat?" Carmen dipped her head to grab a hold of Ashley's attention.

"Mandez." Ashley forced a smile and I knew the millions of questions swimming through her head at the moment. Carmen was probably that last person she wanted to see.

"Well at least you don't have amnesia." Carmen smirked and I slapped her on the arm. "What the fuck?"

"Go away." I shoved her and stepped in front of Ashley. "You really have to ignore her, somewhere down the line she got really annoying."

"You love me!" Carmen sang as she made her way towards the back of the café.

I rolled my eyes and looked back at the booth. "You two can sit while you're waiting."

Chelsea nodded. "I'm just going to see how long it's going to take. If you're thirsty Ash, order whatever." She squeezed my shoulder as she snuck by me.

"What's that?" Sammy looked around and smiled at me. "I think the ladies room is calling me…"

Subtle Taylor, real fucking subtle.

"And then there were two," I nervously laughed and slid into my seat, sitting across from Ashley. I never even tried to hide the fact that I was checking her out. Every part of her.

Everything I've missed.

"Ah…now Carlin, that's what we want to see," Ephiny and Chase came walking up to us and my eyes widened, hoping they wouldn't say something stupid, "scoring with other ladies other than-"

"Ashley." Chase was the first to say her name.

Good memory.

"I am so sorry," Ephiny breathed and I put my head down slightly, shrugging my shoulders. I lifted my head to meet Ashley's gaze and she looked a little – amused?

"Ephiny, Chase," Ashley spoke softly and offered them a smile. "You two look like you haven't aged at all."

"Oh," Chase blushed and Ephiny rolled her eyes, "stop."

"Can you really picture them being the parents of Jaiden?" I smirked.

"Jaiden." Ashley said aloud and snapped her fingers. "Little five year old Jaiden?" Her eyes widened.

"I'm assuming you met the teenage version?" Chase smiled.

Yea, twice.

Ashley only nodded.

"Is there anything we can get you two?" Ephiny smiled and took the empty ice cream tub away from the table, "her and Carmen can eat two of these in one night, it's rather disgusting."

I scowled. Vanilla ice cream is the shit after a stressful day, thank you.

"She could eat three by herself back in high school," was that a twinkle in those brown eyes?

I blushed.

"I'll have a Coke," Ashley finally said and played with her fingers.

"And I'll have a-"

"Dr. Pepper." All three women said at the same time.

I needed a change, didn't I?

The married couple left and it was back to just me and her.

Her and I.

Me and her.

Us.

"How long have you lived here for?" Ashley finally asked.

Yay, questions! We could maybe dig up some answers without anyone else eavesdropping. Sneaky Sam, keeping Chelsea occupied with the many books and puzzles scattered around the reading area. And Carmen was winking at me while flirting with the married couple.

"About seven years," I smiled and shrugged, "my dad helped me get situated and Ryn has been amazing, so have Chase and Eph."

Ashley nodded and smiled when Chase quietly brought us back the drinks, quickly making an exit again. She moved forward and wrapped her lips around the straw, sucking the sweet liquid up slowly.

It's amazing where your mind takes you when you remember the little things.

//

"_It's a little cold to just be sitting in here, eh?" I put the car in motion as we headed off towards the middle of the city, "so are you hungry?"_

_Ashley nodded and looked at me. "If you had plans with friends, you can just drop me back off at the house," she smiled._

_I looked at her briefly before turning my attention back to the road. "I was supposed to have hockey practice but I found out that it was cancelled, so I'm pretty much free." I took a right at the stop sign and came up on traffic. _

"_Did you want to be with Aiden tonight, then?" She asked nervously. _

"_I think I can handle one night away from him," I pulled into the parking lot of a local diner and shut the vehicle off, "besides, it'd be nice to make a new friend around here."_

"_Yeah, especially since I'll be living here now," Ashley sighed and smiled at me. "I wasn't here to visit. I was sent here to stay with Aunt Greta and Uncle Victor. My parents have a house back in England and they've decided to go there to rekindle their marriage. Since there's school and all, I had to stay behind. We only said I was visiting in case my parents changed their minds. But I knew they wouldn't."_

_I was impressed. She kept her cool about all of it and never once showed any sadness. I was assuming she was happy with the decision. "So you've transferred to ViewBelle?" We were walking into the diner, finding a seat. _

"_Actually, I think I'm going to go to Southwood," she smirked and took off her coat. "Much better looking students." _

"_Oh yea?" I laughed and sighed._

"_Yeah, I don't know why you waste your time on Aiden when you could probably have anyone in your own school." Ashley suppressed a grin and looked at the menu. _

"_Like who? You?" I laughed, my joke sounded funnier in my head. But by the way she raised her eyebrows at me I should've slapped myself right there and then._

"_Hmm Carlin, are you implying you're into that sort of thing?" She couldn't even hide her amusement if she tried. I felt bold._

"_I wouldn't turn it down if the opportunity had presented itself." I blushed and she noticed. I dared to look into her and when I did, she didn't even hold back her devilish grin. "I like adventure," I mumbled._

"_Be careful what you wish for," she winked and cleared her throat as she ordered a plate of fries and a drink._

_I followed suit and then when the waitress left, I eyed up my companion. "So are you implying __**you're**__ into that sort of thing?" I watched her raise her eyebrow and take a sip of her drink, which the waitress brought back quickly. The way her lips wrapped around that straw and how her cheeks sunk in slightly as she sucked some of the liquid up, I couldn't stop imagining how it would feel to kiss her. To feel those lips wrapped around my tongue and sucking slightly. God, just the thought of it sent shockwaves to my clit. _

"_I'm not into labels." She shrugged, but I knew she was into girls. Even if it was my imagination wanting her to be interested in me, I watched the way she watched the waitress walk away. _

"_Labels?" I quirked an eyebrow and sat back a bit as the waitress served us our food._

"_Yeah, you know," she leaned back in her seat, picking up a hot fry, "gay, lesbian, dyke, bisexual, heterosexual, homo-" she found her mouth covered by my hand. _

"_I get it," I blushed and sank into my seat. My hand left her mouth and she gave me that sultry look again._

"_Your hands are soft," she murmured, holding my gaze, "did anyone ever tell you that?"_

//

"I'm sorry to hear about your parents," I whispered after minutes of silence. "Aiden told me about the accident and I wanted to cal-"

"Nothing too heavy," she stopped me with her hand on top of mine. I looked at her quizzically, "not yet." She whispered with a squeeze to my hand.

My eyes never left my hand, even when hers was already back in her own lap. I nodded slowly and licked my lips.

"But thank you for thinking of me," she finally whispered, playing with her straw.

Nothing too heavy.

_I always think of you._

"You're welcome."

--


	29. Slowly But Surely

**26 - Slowly But Surely**

**Lucas' PoV**

_**I don't like her. She can't come here and take away Dylan. I won't let her and my mom won't let her either. I don't understand a whole lot about what goes on with my mom's work – but I know she can't just take Dylan away.**_

_**Dylan is my best friend. I've never had a best friend before because Jason doesn't count – he kissed me and that was gross. Boys suck. Just like Aunt Carmen says. But Dylan finds Jason cute. So I guess I can agree with her.**_

_**Hockey practice was so much fun. I taught Dyl a few moves that my mom taught me. My mom used to be famous you know. She was even on Team Canada when she was younger and has the gold medal to prove that she played in the Olympics. She is awesome. I love her.**_

_**Ashley showed up here. Not here as in my house but here as in town. I saw her. I remember seeing her face in every picture of my mom's. She's gorgeous and I'll give her that. A gorgeous lady should not go unknown. Aunt Carmen and mom taught me that one. But she turned out to be my worst enemy. My Dylan stealer. I don't like her.**_

"Lucas Evelyn Carlin!" I heard my name be called and grinned, "I won't be waiting for you two ladies forever. Hurry up and get your cute little butts ready for school or I'm telling your mother that you have a huge crush on Carmen!"

Ew, Carmen. Love her but ew.

_**Jaiden is hot. I want to be Mrs. Jaiden Wynters someday.**_

_**Until later!**_

_**Luc.**_

I finished scribbling in my journal and tucked it neatly back in my sock drawer.

"Coming!" I yelled back and grabbed my sweater, running down the hallway. I stopped and I noticed Dylan standing on the stool in front of the mirror in the bathroom. "Whatchya doin?" I asked, approaching her slowly.

"I can't get this barrette in my hair," Dylan huffed and turned to face me, her lips pouting.

"Well I just throw my hair back in a ponytail but let me try," I smiled softly and grabbed the brush from her hands. I stood behind her and moved the brush through her hair before grabbing the soft blue barrette from her fingers. My teeth gripped my tongue between them as I frowned in concentration, trying to place the barrette perfectly in her hair. "How's that?" I smiled and she squealed, throwing her arms around me.

"Thank you Lukey!" She giggled and took another look at herself through the mirror.

"Seriously," Jaiden's head popped in the doorway with a raised eyebrow, "what is taking you two so long?"

"Look Jaid!" Dylan pointed to her hair. "Luc helped me with my hair!"

I tensed a bit.

"Aww," Jaiden came in the bathroom and knelt down, poking me in the sides a little, "Lucas is a softly deep down."

"Shut up." I frowned and walked passed her, grabbing my sweater from the floor and made my way downstairs.

I didn't want her to see the blush in my cheeks.

On our way to school, Dylan brought up _her_ again. "So do you think she'll look different from the last time I saw her?" Her eyes widened as she looked at Jaiden.

Jaiden smiled softly, keeping her eyes on the road. "I'm sure she will."

From pictures I had seen – Ashley hadn't really changed much. I felt bad for holding back what I knew about Dylan's mom.

I think it was secrets like that, that tore Auntie Alex and mom apart.

I didn't want it to tear Dylan and I apart either.

But I didn't understand when I should keep my mouth shut or when to leave it open.

I wanted to say "your mom is absolutely beautiful, just like you." But I couldn't.

The words caught in my throat.

I wouldn't let _her_ take my Dylan away.

Not now.

Not ever.

--

**Spencer's PoV**

"I just don't understand why, Dad!" I hissed but remained calm. It'd been a while since I talked to him but seeing as Ashley was now in town and her first meeting with Dylan was that night, I had to call and try and piece myself together with questions I had in my own head that needed to be answered.

"_Spence, it wasn't about keeping this from you on purpose,"_ he offered sincerely, "_I didn't think you'd be this upset."_

"Dad!" I sighed heavily. "My ex is right down the hall and you know why? Because she's working on getting her daughter back. Her daughter is Dylan. Dylan is the girl you so desperately wanted me to take care of… the daughter of Ashley Davies. Ashley, Dad. ASHLEY!"

I was freaking out. More than I thought I would.

"I mean, did you think that'd I'd say no if you mentioned it was really her? Did you think I'd be that heartless?"

"_You know I don't think that of you, Spencer."_ My dad sounded tired. _"I just thought it'd help the process go more smoothly. I see now that it was a mistake on my part and I apologize."_

I raised an eyebrow. I loved my dad. I did. He was still my hero but God this was tearing me apart. "Apologize? Dad, please. I'm already dealing with a grovelling sister."

"_Alex?"_ His voice sounded surprised. _"Honey, what's going on?"_

Parents.

"Please don't play dumb, it doesn't suit you." I sighed and rubbed my temple. "She knew this whole time about Dylan while she was here. And come to think of it, it's a little funny that she showed up the same time I had Dylan placed in my home." Wow, why did I not see that before?

"_She was listening to me,"_ he was defending her? _"I told her not to tell you about Dylan, okay? If you're going to be mad at anyone, be mad at me."_

"Well then Pops, you're in luck because I'm quite pissed at the moment. At you. At Alex. At mom-"

"_Whoa Spence,"_ I heard his voice drop a few notches, _"you're mother knows nothing about this, don't be upset with her."_

Great. Just fucking great. "So Alex gets her conniving little lies and skills from you," I laughed out loud, slapping my hand against the surface, "just great Dad. More secrets in this family that were not necessary." I took a deep breath. "Did you know Ashley had Dylan since day one?"

A heard a pause and then he cleared his throat. _"No. I wasn't aware of Dylan until after she was taken away. Alex and Ashley had a life of their own, Spence."_

I didn't like the way that sounded but I knew being jealous over something that probably never happened, would be completely pointless.

Ashley wasn't mine.

"Why?" I muttered. "Why did this all have to be a secret?"

I didn't get it.

So Ashley had a baby. She had a baby that obviously made her happy and I was happy for her. She made a little family of two and someone felt the need to keep it from everyone.

I didn't get it.

"_Spencer…"_

"I gotta go Dad." I hung up quickly and balled my fists up. I had to be professional.

I had to be strong.

A knock at my office door ripped me from my thoughts and I silently thanked whoever the intruder was. "Open."

"Hey gorgeous," Ryn popped her head in and gave me a soft smile, "Ashley's wanting to see you, is that okay?"

I swallowed and closed my eyes briefly. Mentally composing myself and emotionally trying to get myself in check. "Send her in."

Ryn nodded and stepped aside to allow Ashley by. "I'm going to be in my office with Chelsea." She smiled and closed the door behind her.

Ashley took a moment to scan my office once again, much like she did the first time yesterday morning. I didn't want to interrupt her so I sat back down in my chair and placed my hands neatly on top of my desk.

"You look like you've done well for yourself," she finally spoke, walking over to the framed certificates and diplomas on my wall, "that's really nice to see, Carlin."

My heartstrings pulled a little. Carlin was so bittersweet when it came to her. I missed it yet I hated it all at the same time.

_Nothing too heavy._

"Spencer." I corrected her softly and she spun around to look at me. "My name's Spencer."

Ashley's eyes fell to the floor briefly and then looked back up at me. "You look good, Spencer."

I smiled a little and I noticed one twitched on her lips as well.

"Thank you." I pointed to a seat and she took it, crossing her leg over the other.

Always a lady.

"What can I do for you?" I asked her as normal as I could. It killed me that this was how we had to reunite after all these years.

"I just wanted to ask you another question," Ashley smiled again, almost shyly.

The Ashley Davies I knew was cocky and so self-confident. The Ashley Davies in front of me was the exact opposite.

It was a little endearing.

But I hated that she squirmed like I was scrutinizing her in some way.

"Feel free to ask me anything." I leaned forward and bit my lip.

"Would you mind that when I see Dylan again for the first time," she stopped and took a deep breath, "it'd be at your house?"

I sat back slowly and felt a little light headed. It would put so much joy in heart to fulfill Dylan's biggest wish but it'd break at the very same moment when Lucas' heart shatters because of it.

"It's just that Dylan would be around a strong environment and I think it'd be less nerve racking for the both of us if we had it here." Ashley stood and began to pace a little. "But I get it if you think that it's too weird, I mean, I can't just go and invite myself over to your place like that, what the hell was I thinki-" She stopped talked when she noticed I was standing right in front of her.

"First," I placed my hands on her shoulders and pressed her to sit down, "I just replaced this carpet and I really don't want it worn down already." I backed up to give us distance because those two seconds of close proximity sent my heart racing. I leaned against my desk and folded my arms over my chest. "Second," I smiled a little, trying to ease her nerves, "you're welcome over to see your daughter whenever you want, Ashley. I mean, whenever you can."

Ashley and I stared at each other for a few seconds in silence. I could hear the wheels turning in her head probably just as much as she could hear mine. I finally pushed myself off my desk and tapped the surface with my fingertips. "Just let me give you my address."

Ashley took the piece of paper from my fingers and whispered a 'thank you'.

"I pick the girls up after school around three-thirty," I cleared my throat and chewed my bottom lip, "we're usually home by four or so. I mentioned to Chelsea that five would be a good time, that way Dylan can still get her homework done and get her nightly bath time in-"

"You really are good to her, aren't you?" Ashley stood up and tilted her head a little.

"She's a little girl that needs love and protection," I offered quietly, all of a sudden feeling naked at the way she was looking at me. "She's very loveable," I dared to look into Ashley brown eyes that were glued to my own, "kinda like her mother."

"Spence," she breathed and it hurt when she said my name like that. It hurt because I've missed it so much and it hurt because now was not the time.

_Nothing too heavy._

"Ashley," I scolded lightly, "not now." I turned around to walk behind my desk. "I have roast or chicken, which would you prefer?"

"Prefer?"

"For dinner." I pushed. "I think I can feed two extra mouths," I shrugged, "besides, Dylan will be more than ecstatic if you agree."

For the first time in twelve years, Ashley smiled at me. I mean, really smiled at me. Nose crinkle and all. For a brief moment I saw happiness shoot through her eyes.

"I'll take that as a yes," I replied and it wasn't until Ashley blushed a little that I realized I was in full-blown smile mode as well.

Funny how you get so caught up in one emotion that the true one you're feeling the most, slips from its hiding spot and reveals itself.

--


	30. Pieces To Be Complete

**27 - Pieces To Be Complete**

**Ashley's PoV**

I stared at the address that was in my hands. I blinked when Chelsea nudged me as she turned down an unfamiliar road. "Never been this way?" She asked.

"Uh," I looked around the small 'town' and shook my head, "no."

"Keewatin," she let the town name roll off her tongue and shrugged, turning down another street before she approached a large white bridge, "Apparently Kenora is named after three different communities that surrounded this place."

I raised an eyebrow. She was trying to ease the tension because we were on our way towards Spencer's. The sun had already set and it was only passed five.

And it was cold.

"Humour me." I replied with a soft laugh because I wanted the distraction.

"The K-E, in Kenora, stands for Keewatin," Chelsea slowed down at the end of the bridge when a train was approaching us. She took the opportunity to look at me. "N-O, stands for Norman; which is the small neighbourhood area we passed through to get here," she smiled and I couldn't help but smile back. "R-A, stands for Rat Portage, which is a First Nation Reservation that borders with the city. Actually, Kenora originally was called Rat Portage before they changed it."

"Have you been studying this place?" I asked in slight amusement.

"Gotta love 'wikipedia'." Chelsea shrugged. "Besides, you should know a little history about the town you wanted to move to years ago."

"All the history that was needed," I sighed, "was stored away for protection."

"I know this must be weird for you," Chelsea turned down a dirt road and as soon as we hit the top of the hill, I noticed an open view of 'Winnipeg River'. It was beautiful to see the lights and cabins lights lit up from across the lake. "The things that bind two people together are really something."

"What do you mean?" I turned to look at her and she just smiled a little. "Chels."

"You said it yourself last night," she nudged me, "this is fate. Maybe Dylan was supposed to end up-" she stopped mid-sentence as she turned down the right drive way. A large log-cabin like house was before us with a wraparound porch, "-here. Shit Ash, this place is nice."

I slowly stepped out of the car when it stopped and shut my door. I took in the lights the lit up the pathway towards the door and how shovelled the snow was. A black Chevy Blazer was parked by the small garage. A hockey net was placed in the large open yard area where I could tell there were fresh footprints in the snow. As soon as I stepped up on the porch, I looked ahead and saw a worn out path go towards a dock where a boat was pulled up and covered by a tarp.

"I think Dylan really was in good hands." Chelsea squeezed my shoulder and turned me to face her. "Are you ready?"

I shook my head no.

God, this was all so much.

"Ash?" She frowned and I shook my head again before taking off and letting out what little contents were in my stomach, by the garage door. "Oh Ashley, are you okay?" Chelsea rubbed my back and I nodded.

"Yea," I laughed a little nervously and grabbed water from my car, rinsing my mouth out before replacing it with a piece of gum. "I just needed to get that out of my system."

Chelsea laughed. "Come on girl, your daughter is behind the walls of that house probably just as nervous as you are."

I couldn't help but smile. "Aren't you coming?" I asked when Chelsea started to walk towards the car. My car.

"Oh yea," she waved a hand in the air, "I'm just going to give you like, a five minute head start," she dangled the keys in the air, "besides you have nowhere to run."

"Ha." I frowned and went back onto the porch. I wrung my hands nervously and smiled at the hand carved 'Carlin's' sign that hung from the screen door. Swallowing back the bile a little, I moved to make my hand do the very first knock.

I listened carefully.

And then I heard fast footsteps.

Silence.

The door swung open and my heart pounded in my chest wildly. I was met with vaguely familiar eyes.

I was staring back at that same smaller version of Spencer Carlin.

"Hey-"

I was now staring at the door that was just opened a few seconds ago.

I was positively sure that a door was slammed in my face.

And I was positively sure I was in shock.

A little bit.

"Lucas!" I heard from behind that same door before it swung open and I was greeted with warmer eyes. "God Ash, I'm so sorry." Spencer apologized and opened the screen door. "Come in."

I swallowed, trying to calm my nerves. I stepped in the warm cozy home and the smell of chicken and a hint of cinnamon filled my senses. I think the cinnamon was coming from Spencer.

"I am so sorry about that," she kept saying while looking up towards a set of stairs, "I'll go talk to her."

"It's-it's okay." I finally managed to say something. "Um, really."

"No, it's not okay," Spencer frowned, "she had no right to do that and I will let her know that." Then her facial expressions softened. "Make yourself at home," she looked behind me, "where's Chelsea?"

"Chelsea wanted to give me a five minute head start." I tried to smile.

I mean, I think I was smiling.

"Well," Spencer cleared her throat and before she could say anything, footsteps came running down the stairs.

"I. Don't. Like you." The small blonde buzzed passed me and towards the hallway before slamming another door.

"She's never like that," Spencer looked a little worried and took my coat from me. "Dylan's upstairs in her room," she finally said, "usually she has her iPod in her ears while reading so if you wanted to go and-"

"MOM?!" A screeched came from the top of stairs and I widened my eyes as Dylan practically threw herself down the steps and into my arms. She was crying heavily and I knew that I was too. "Mom, mommy, is that you?" She pulled back, her brown eyes full of tears. Her small hands were cupping my face, gripping tightly.

"Yes baby," I choked out and pulled her face back into my neck, holding on for dear life, "it's really me."

I held her.

I couldn't let go.

I didn't want to let go.

"I'm just going to go check on Lucas," Spencer finally whispered and left us alone.

"I missed you." Cried Dylan as we sunk to the wooden floor, hanging on tight.

"Oh God Dyl," I whispered barely, "I missed you so much."

"Mom," she pulled back and wiped her small thumbs along my face, "I really did miss you."

"I know." I nodded and pulled her back in for a hug.

We stayed there in silence for a while. I didn't even notice or hear Chelsea make her way in. She was already sitting down at one of the breakfast bar stools, helping Spencer grate some cheese.

I think Dylan and I stayed close for at least ten minutes before the world started coming back to us again.

"Don't cry mommy," Dylan whispered. "It makes me cry."

"I'm sorry," I whispered and wiped her tears away, "god baby you're so beautiful." I stood up and ignored the cramps in my legs. "You've grown up so much."

Dylan twirled around and beamed a smile at me. "Lucas picked out my outfit," she twirled again in her small jeans and white sweater, "and she did my hair." She pointed to the blue barrette and I bit my lip, kissing the top of her head. "Did you want to meet her?"

I smiled sadly. Lucas didn't seem to like me.

"I'd love too," I whispered, "but maybe we should just go help Spencer with dinner."

I wanted Lucas to like me. But I wasn't going to push. I couldn't exactly blame her. From what Ryn told me, Lucas and Dylan were the best of friends. I was seen as a threat to the young Carlin and as much as that hurt, I figured I'd let it play out on its own.

My eyes caught Spencer's as she handed me a kleenex. "Thank you."

"Spencer, this is my mommy!" Dylan beamed proudly and it made my heart flutter. The fact that Dylan showed no sign of being angry with me helped me relax a bit more. "Where's Lukey?"

I watched Spencer's eyes slowly drag away from mine and to Dylan's. She knelt down at my daughter's level and tucked a curly strand behind her ear. "Lucas isn't really being good so she's in her room until dinner's ready."

Dylan frowned and shook her head. "She's never bad!"

"I know," Spencer nodded and then looked up at me, "why don't you show your mom your room?"

"Yay!" Dylan clapped her hands and squeezed my hand before dragging me away from Chelsea and Spencer and up winding stairs. "Look!" She pointed to a picture of me on her desk. "Spencer said they sent a picture of you for me."

I got a closer look. It was an old picture from high school. It was from the Christmas formal. Spencer was sneaky.

"I have one of you too," I offered Dylan and dug the worn out picture from my pocket, "see?"

Dylan grabbed it and sat back on her bed. "I miss that shirt." She pointed out and smiled, handing it back. "I grew a lot!"

"You did." I nodded in agreement and glanced around her room. It had a baby blue theme to it with posters of young celebrities on the wall. I noticed a few things that weren't hers though.

Trophies.

"Spencer split them up between me and Lucas." Dylan stood beside me. "I like this one the best," I smiled as she pointed to the one trophy Spencer had originally given to me after winning her last championship. I told her to keep it until we got our own place together.

She still had it.

"Spencer used to be famous mom, did you know? I never said anything but I knew she looked liked that blonde hockey player that played for Team Canada. Remember mom?" Dylan bounced a bit and I could only nod. "I finished my homework," she changed the subject and grabbed my hand, showing me her tidy desk, "see?"

I sat down on the small seat and pulled Dylan on my lap. She read me over everything she wrote for her spelling. She smiled and giggled while she played with my fingers.

A knock at the door calmed us both down and Spencer poked her head in the door. "I don't mean to interrupt but dinner's ready in five."

"Oh!" Dylan hopped off my lap and ran towards the blonde, hugging her leg. "You didn't set the table yet, did you?"

I watched as Spencer laughed and shook her head, kissing the small head in front of her. "I wouldn't dare steal your job!"

"Bye mom! Gotta set the table." Dylan blew me a kiss and rushed away.

I stood up slowly and rubbed the back of my neck, sighing as it popped a little. "You have a really lovely home, Spencer."

Spencer blushed.

It was the first time she blushed and it made me smile.

"Thank you," she stepped forward, "listen, about Luc…"

"I get it." I held my hands up and shrugged. "I get doors slammed in my face all the time." I laughed a little and Spencer just looked sad.

"She's not like that Ash," she sighed, "she's just upset. She's trying to wrap her brain around this whole thing and I'm surprised I still have a head attached to my shoulders."

I had to chuckle softly because I totally understood. "I know what you mean."

"Alex uh," she cleared her throat, "she never told you about Lucas did she?"

I shook my head no. "And she never told you about Dylan," I bit my lip, "obviously."

I could tell by the way she was looking at me that she wanted answers.

As did I.

I finally got to hold my daughter in my arms.

I was happy.

But I wasn't complete.

"We'll talk," Spencer read my mind and nodded, gripping the door in her hand, "about everything."

"Yea," I breathed and she just smiled, holding her hand out for me to grab. I took it. I closed my eyes as she pulled me close and I found myself wrapped up in her arms.

Oh God.

I was in Spencer's arms.

She was hugging me.

"I think my cooking's improved," she teased softly when she pulled back and then she was gone again.

I smiled.

I really smiled.

--


	31. The Voice Of A Mother

_This is for all you birthday ladies (and gents). My birthday has been great so far today, so I hope yours is too! This is the second update of the day!_

**28 - The Voice Of A Mother**

**Spencer's PoV**

Laughter could be heard in the living room and it warmed my heart. The laughter of the Davies ladies.

I finished clearing off the plates and washed my hands. "Mom?" I turned around to find Lucas standing behind me with a tea towel in her hand. "Did you need any help?"

I smiled and stepped forward, grabbing the towel from her hands and sitting her on the stool in front of me. "Did you finish your homework?"

Lucas nodded and swallowed. "I don't like her." She finally whispered, blinking back tears.

"Honey," I sighed and tucked hair behind her ears, cupping her cheek gently, "listen to Dylan, hear how happy she is?"

"I know." Another whisper fell from her lips and she shrugged. "But she's that happy with us too."

I rested my chin on her small leg and looked up at her, smiling as her fingers ran through my hair. "Ashley is a great person, Luc. I mean, she always was when I knew her."

"But she wasn't there for her!" Lucas raised her voice and I heard the laughter die down.

"Lucas, keep your voice down," I stood up and shook my head, "you don't need to use a tone like that."

"Well," she huffed and pushed herself off the stool, "I'm tired of being the only one here who thinks that Dylan leaving us is a bad idea!" With that, she ran up to her room, slamming the door.

I threw the towel down and made my way to the bottom of the stairs. "If you slam that door one more time Lucas Evelyn Carlin, I swear I'm taking it off the hinges!" I hollered in my best 'Paula Carlin' voice.

I waited for her to slam it again, knowing she wouldn't. But you never knew with her, she was a Carlin after all.

My bedroom door did get taken off the hinges for a week.

I couldn't sneak Ashley in at all that week. And I couldn't sneak out.

Try having a make-out session with no door. I even tried to hang up a sheet but it was ripped down.

Bad, Paula. I missed out on potential Ashley time back then.

"Should I go?" Ashley said from behind me and I shook my head.

"No, she's just… I don't know." I sounded defeated.

How do you tell your daughter that having Dylan's mother back in her life was a good thing? Yes, it hurt me too. I felt what Lucas was feeling but Dylan deserved Ashley in her life.

And though I didn't know that whole story behind Ashley's accident that cost her Dylan, I believed deep down that there was some reasonable excuse. Within a matter of an hour, I witnessed the happiness that fell upon the young Davies face whenever she'd look over at her mother and see her eating right beside her.

If a mother had abandoned a child on purpose and treated them badly, you wouldn't have an overly ecstatic nine year old bouncing at every word that fell from the perfect lips of Ashley.

"Mommy, when do you have to leave?" Dylan came up behind her and grabbed her hand, while looking at me.

"Soon baby," Ashley whispered and knelt down, running her fingers through Dylan's wavy hair, "but I'll be back."

Dylan nodded but frowned. "Promise?"

I smiled and knelt down beside Ashley. "Well, it's really up to Chelsea," I said quietly, "but your first game is in two nights with the team and I think your mother should be there."

Dylan's eyes widened and she grinned. "Yea mom, can you come? I'm finally playing hockey just like you said I could!"

Ashley beamed and watched in amazement at the excitement her daughter possessed. "Of course I'll be there."

"Yay! Spencer told me I had to call her Coach when we're on the ice. Even Lucas calls her Coach, isn't that cool?" Dylan smiled and squeezed Ashley's hand before yawning.

"Hey Dyl," I whispered in her ear, "why don't you let your mom get your bath ready for you and then she can read you a story."

I knew Ashley heard me and I could feel her looking at me. I felt red as if I were blushing.

To tell you the truth, I thought it'd be harder to allow Ashley to do the things with Dylan that I have been doing for the past four months. But the truth was, it felt natural to back off and allow the two to reunite. I wasn't going to stand in the way of that.

Dylan nodded and ran upstairs to grab her pyjamas.

"Thank you." Ashley stood up and turned to face me. "I mean, for everything Spencer."

I swallowed and laughed a little. "I told you, Dylan's a good kid…" I looked up at her, "you raised her really well."

Tears broke out in Ashley's eyes and she covered her face. She was crying and I immediately felt bad. What I felt bad for, I wasn't sure. "Ashley?" It hurt to see her cry.

"You don't know how long it's been since someone told me that," she whispered through quiet sobs, "God Spencer, I tried so hard to be a good mom and then, God."

"Hey," I whispered and ushered her towards the back room, "look at me," I cupped her face and sighed a little, "Ashley I don't know the whole story but I'm sure that whatever happened had nothing to do with your parenting. I've watched you with Dylan this past hour and I've got to say, you make one hell of a mother."

Ashley stopped sniffling and looked at me. I reached over the small desk and grabbed kleenex, handing it to her while my thumbs wiped the tears that fell on her cheeks.

"I think there's a lot to talk about," I whispered, "and we will. I mean, I want to know everything that's happened and not just with Dylan, I just- I-" I looked down and tried to clear the lump in my throat.

God why was it hot in there all of a sudden? Don't say it, Carlin. Don't you _dare_ fucking say it. "-I've missed you."

_Fuck._

I closed my eyes and tried to stop my heart from jumping out of my body. I really did try. I shook my head and let go of Ashley's face, stepping back. I didn't want to look at her, I didn't.

I couldn't.

I was scared to see what I'd find behind those eyes.

"I've missed you too." I heard it. Barely, but I heard it. I opened my eyes to find her staring at me.

I didn't know where to go from there.

"I think we should go find Dylan," I finally whispered. "Ash," she was about to leave and turned around at the sound of her name. "Dylan's never said one bad word about you. She's missed you and I think," I licked my dry lips, "I think we're glad that you're back."

Ashley blushed and it was rather cute. She nodded silently and took a moment to compose herself before disappearing out of the room.

I made my way down the hall and noticed Chelsea had all the dishes done. "Oh my God you didn't have to do that!" I rushed to her and she just laughed at me.

"I didn't mind," she shrugged, "everyone needed to talk and I'm not one to just sit around and do nothing."

"I so hear you there." I nodded and then someone was at the door, knocking loudly. I shrugged my shoulders and moved towards the door, thinking maybe Ryn decided to stop by or Carmen wanted to be nosey.

"Hey sexy," I was pulled into a kiss and immediately pushed the body back. "what the hell, Spence?"

"Aimee!" I hissed and shut the door quickly, making sure not to let all the cold air in. "What are you doing here?" I glanced at Chelsea who quickly averted her eyes and made her way back into the kitchen.

"Well it's Wednesday night and I've missed you and usually," she breathed in my ear, "the girls are with Jaiden at a hockey game these nights."

I grabbed her by the shoulders and shook my head. "You have to go."

"Spencer," Aimee sighed and shrugged out of my grasp before looking at me intensely, "don't you miss me?"

No, not really.

"Look, Aimee, it's just not the right time." I stressed and swallowed. "The girls are here."

"Oh." She looked a little disappointed.

"Besides, I didn't call." I whispered. We had rules. I'd call her and she wouldn't show up on my doorstep unexpectedly.

"You never call me anymore," Aimee threw her hands up in the air and stopped. "Who is she?"

"What?" I raised an eyebrow. She could not be getting jealous. She wasn't allowed.

Another rule.

"There's a sweet ass mustang out in your driveway," she narrowed her eyes slightly, "who is she?"

"Hey Spencer, do you have an extra-" Ashley stopped in her tracks when she noticed Aimee standing close to me, "-towel."

"Uh," I cleared my throat, wiping my hands on my jeans before nodding, "there's a few in the closet beside the bathroom door."

Aimee smiled and licked her lips. "So you're the new play toy of the month," I watched her eyes rake over the brunette's body and I quickly shot Ashley an apology look, "I thought you said you didn't do brunettes anymore, Spence?"

Ashley's jaw dropped a little and sputtered. "I'm just…"

I felt an arm slip around my waist and froze. I looked to my side to see Chelsea standing beside me with her other hand on her hip, looking at the blonde. "Excuse me, but do we have a problem here?"

Ashley and I shared a confused look.

"Who are you?" Aimee frowned.

"Chelsea," she muttered and raised an eyebrow. "I'm really sorry to interrupt this bitch fight but baby," she turned to look at me, "I thought you said it'd just be us three tonight."

I didn't know Chelsea.

But I had to thank her – I think.

"I know?" I winced as the door flew upon and slammed again.

Aimee was gone.

Chelsea smiled a little and let me go.

"What was that?" Ashley raised an eyebrow and I sighed heavily.

"A mistake." I brushed passed her and made my way upstairs.

I needed 'me' time.

--


	32. Well, Congratulations

**Flashbacks are in **_italics_

**29 - Well … Congratulations**

**Ashley's PoV**

"_Do you like her?" Dylan finally crawled into bed and I kissed her forehead. I hated the fact that I had to leave her side again but she seemed to be taking it rather well. "Mommy?"_

"_Hmm?" I whispered, looking at her beautiful face. "Do I like Spencer?"_

_Dylan nodded eagerly. "She says she likes you."_

"_Did she now?" I smiled and tickled Dylan's sides before climbing up on the bed and snuggling beside her. "Spencer's special," I whispered and played with her tiny piano fingers. "I used to know Spencer, Dyl."_

_Dylan's eyes showed some confusion. "You did?"_

"_Yea," I sighed, "but in school."_

"_Oh," she nodded slowly, "she never said she knew you."_

"_I know," I kissed her temple and sighed, leaning against the headboard, "things are complicated and once us grown-ups can figure it all out, then we'll help you understand it all, okay?"_

_Dylan smiled and wrapped my arm tighter around her small frame. "So, do you like her?" She asked again and I had to smile. _

_**I **__**love her.**_

"_Yes." I answered and caressed her cheek before kissing her forehead again. "You should try and get some sleep baby."_

"_I can't." Dylan pouted. "Lucas hasn't said goodnight yet."_

_I realized at that point that the young Carlin had really become a big part in Dylan's life. A big part. Just as I was about to say something, there was a soft knock on the door._

_Lucas came in the room in her flannel bottoms and black torn old hockey jersey. "I just wanted to say goodnight." She whispered without looking at me. I watched her move to the other side of the bed and pressed her lips against Dylan's cheek. "Night lil sis."_

_My heart fell to the floor._

_Dylan's smile was enough to keep it there. "Night big sis."_

_Lucas finally looked up at me and sighed a little. "I'm sorry about earlier," she whispered, "have a goodnight Miss Davies."_

"_What did she do Mommy?" Dylan asked wide eyed. I snuggled closer to my daughter, pressing my cheek against her head. "She'll come around." She finally said when I remained silent. _

_I don't know why, but I believed her somehow._

--

"What did I tell you about the pacing on my carpet?" Spencer raised an eyebrow at me and I stopped mid-step, looking at her sheepishly. "Thought so." She smiled and pointed to the seat. "Ashley, I don't know why you're so worried."

"I just don't know either." I sighed and sat down, not so lady like that time. "Carter has been away with Chelsea for nearly forty-five minutes and it's killing me here."

Spencer leaned forward and chewed slightly on the tip of her pen. "What terrifies you more, the verdict or your reaction?"

I stared at her. All of it was fucking terrifying. But at the same time, the Carlin's reaction terrified me the most. Lucas already had it out for me and I could tell Spencer really cared for Dylan, like I did. She was truly a mother to her and I was about to rip that apart?

I couldn't handle hurting them again. I couldn't handle seeing that pain in Spencer's eyes like I did the day I broke up with her.

I'd die before I allowed that to happen.

But Dylan was my daughter.

"This all just scares me," I admitted softly. "How you'll react, how Lucas will react…"

Sitting back in her chair, Spencer sighed and closed her eyes. "I would like to say this isn't fair to us," she finally opened her eyes and looked at me with a little bit of sorrow, "but really, this isn't fair to you."

I looked at her slightly confused. She stood up and made her way towards me, taking the seat next to me. "What?"

"Dylan has been with us since the beginning of the school year and we've enjoyed having her with us. She fell into our family perfectly and I know Lucas loves her and would protect Dylan with her life if she needed too." I felt her hand rest over top of mine. I was sure it was just for comfort. God Spencer was doing a good job at comforting me since I showed up unexpectedly in her life. "But Ashley, you've been through so much as well. You went through a lot and you're here now, getting Dylan back in your life," she smiled softly, tears formed in the corner of her eyes, "you should be proud."

"But-"

"No," Spencer shook her head, "it's not fair that this is tearing you up inside when you should be jumping for joy. Dylan's _your_ daughter and she belongs with you."

I swallowed hard and looked away, tears forming in my own eyes. "God Spencer, this just hurts so much." I finally let out a soft sob.

"I know." I heard her whisper as she pulled me into a hug, rubbing my back slowly. I immediately felt safe.

A knock at the door caused us to break apart and wait until Spencer called come in. She didn't give the word until she was back behind her desk.

Personal feelings were starting get involved but at least Spencer could put on her professional smile and yell 'come in'.

Carter walked in behind Chelsea and threw me a wink.

Oh God.

I held onto the arm rests tightly.

"Miss Carlin, I think it's safe to say that Miss Davies is allowed to start taking Dylan out on her own," he threw some files on Spencer's desk and she picked them up, thumbing through them, "plus she's on a leave of absence from her work in Thunder Bay until the end of the month. It gives us enough time to get the hearing pushed through."

"Work?" Spencer looked at me and I swallowed.

It wasn't much. I managed to snag a part time position at the elementary school as a music teacher. I basically filled in when and where I was needed. I went to school for it and took entrepreneur classes while I stayed 'behind the scenes' making Alex's albums. You always needed a 'fall back'.

"Miss Davies teaches music classes at Greenpoint Elementary," Chelsea smiled, "they allowed her to leave for this."

Spencer looked at me and I wasn't sure what to make of her expression. "Wow," she breathed with a smile and bit her bottom lip, "so um," she cleared her throat, pulling her hair to the side and sat down, "when's the hearing?"

"Two weeks." Carter smiled at me. "It's kind of mandatory but we both know Miss Davies doesn't need one."

"Yeah." Spencer nodded and closed the file folder, pushing it back to the corner of her desk. "Well," she looked at me, "congratulations."

I should've been jumping for joy.

But God if you witnessed the look on her face that I was, it was heart wrenching. "Thank you."

"Looks like I don't have to escort you to that hockey game after all." Chelsea nudged me and I nodded, my eyes trained on the blonde behind the desk.

She wasn't looking at me or anyone for that matter. Finally her eyes looked up from her desk and she licked her lips. "Dylan's game is at six-thirty, we usually go for a light dinner at Rapture around four-thirty if you're interested."

I nodded and stood up. I needed air and a little alone time. "I'll see you then Spencer."

She nodded and smiled a little.

I needed to use the bathroom.

I was glad I never had that pizza bun for an early lunch.

--


	33. Moody Carlin Needs Some Thing

**30 - Moody Carlin Needs Some… Thing**

**Spencer's PoV**

"Pick it up Wynters!" I screamed as she lost the puck for the fifth time in the first ten minutes of the third period. I sighed and leaned against the boards, watching my team fumble a bit.

That was not how I trained them and it was frustrating me.

Maybe it was just me.

I was upset with how I was feeling with the whole Ashley and Dylan deal.

The fact that Ashley had a job waiting for her was another thing that spun me for a loop. Don't get me wrong, I was proud that she made an effort and she had a pretty good job at that. One I know she'd be great at.

But it still meant she was leaving.

With Dylan.

Leaving Kenora.

Leaving me.

The referee blew the whistle and it snapped me out of my thoughts. "Penalty on number eleven!" He hollered and watched as Jaiden shrugged, getting into the penalty box.

"Argh!" I threw my clipboard down. We were down by three and it irked me a little.

I usually allow these girls play for fun.

Usually.

But I wasn't up to losing that night. Not with my mood.

I banged on the glass of the penalty box and she jumped, pulling up her long hair in a pony-tail. "What the hell?!"

"What, she hooked me, I shoved her and then I tripped her." Jaiden shrugged. "No big, we'll win Coach."

I didn't even bother to open my mouth. I just gave her my best pissed off look and continued to watch the game unfold.

"Calm down, Coach." I heard a voice come up beside me and I turned to find Carmen standing there with an extra coffee for me. "You're on edge, chill a bit."

"Shut it Mandez." I hissed and took a sip of my coffee. I watched as one of my girls made their way down the rink and scored. "Yes!" I screamed. "See team, do more of that and make me happy."

"You need to get laid, Coach." Jaiden smirked and I raised an eyebrow at her, snapping my fingers and pointing to her seat.

She obeyed.

"Well you kinda do." Carmen whispered in my ear. I rolled my eyes.

"Not in the mood," I sighed and pushed her away.

"What, you thought I was offering myself to you?" She chuckled and I shoved the coffee back in her hand. It was my silent 'fuck off'. "Damn Carlin, what's up with you?"

"Nothing." I paced and screamed at Jaiden while she was let out of the box. "Get 'em, Wynters!"

"On it, Coach." She smirked and put her helmet back in place.

Oh yeah. Five minutes to go and we were up by one.

I knew I liked Jaiden for a reason.

And we won.

"Good game." I told my team and followed them to shake hands with the other team and coach.

Afterwards, I blew my whistle and the girls looked at me in the locker room. "Not done bitching?" Jaiden smiled innocently.

"Wynters," I scolded softly and she backed up, smiling a little. "I just want to apologize for my behaviour," I addressed the team, "it wasn't fair to you all and I'm sorry."

Jaiden kind of gave me a sad look and stood up, patting my arm. "I understand."

--

"So then Kylie says that she's better than me when it comes to lacrosse. I told her she should just start shoving the dirt in her face now because I'll have her head so far in it-"

"Luc!" I gasped and raised an eyebrow. "You're seriously no longer allowed to hang out with Aunt Carmen, Aunt Sammy and Jaiden alone by yourself again."

"But why?" Sammy pouted as leaned across the kitchen counter, picking a cheese cube and popping it into her mouth. "It's so much fun corrupting such innocent young ones."

"Not my young one." I looked at her and she just smiled, shrugging.

"Don't you own an alarm clock?" Carmen yawned, walking out of the spare bedroom in her torn white tank top and flannel bottoms.

"She does," Sammy smiled, "you just don't know how to use one."

"Bitch." Carmen scowled.

"Bad word!" Lucas gasped and giggled when I scolded Carmen.

"Where's Dylan?" I looked at my daughter and she just shrugged.

"I think inside her room finishing her homework."

"Kid," Sammy slid next to Lucas and ruffled her hair a bit, "I think when Jaiden gets here, we should take you and Dyl out for a hot chocolate."

Lucas' grey eyes widened with the smile on her face. "Can we mom?!"

Clearly they didn't take my previous statement about them being left alone with Lucas seriously. "Of course." Apparently, neither did I.

"Yessssss!" Lucas pumped her fists in the air as she shuffled out of her chair and ran up the stairs. "Dylan get your butt dressed, we're going out!"

"Wow," Sammy turned to look at me, "I want one."

"Well you can't have mine." I looked at her seriously.

"Yea, you can't have ours." Carmen stuck her tongue out at Sammy and I had to roll my eyes.

The two should just fuck and get it over with already.

Seriously.

"Hey," Jaiden opened the door without knocking and kicked her snowy boots off at the door, "are there little children's ears near by?"

"You mean aside from yours?" Sammy smirked.

"Ouch." Jaiden frowned and held a hand over her heart. "That stung Taylor, you should definitely kiss it better." She wiggled her eyebrows.

"In your dreams." Sam chuckled and I noticed Carmen raise an eyebrow at me.

I shrugged.

Too much fucking sexual tension in this house.

"Oh God yeah, you're in my dreams alright." The teenager winked and took off her beanie hat, pulling her static hair back in a pony-tail. "So you would not believe the morning I had! I woke up at four-thirty to go to practice with this wicked bitch of the North as a Coach only to find out she's in a worse mood for the game after school."

"I heard she needs to get laid." Carmen nodded and winked at me.

"All three out of you, out of my house." I pointed towards the door and threw Jaiden's hat at her.

"Fine." Sammy held up her hands. "We're just waiting for the little ones and we'll be out of your face."

"Maybe you should Brooke yourself while we're gone, Spence." Carmen whispered in my ear.

"Fuck you." I whispered with a smirk.

"Bad word!" Lucas pointed at me. I never realized she was standing there.

"Yes MOM, bad word!" Jaiden scolded playfully before grabbing Lucas' face in her hands, popping a kiss on her forehead.

Lucas grinned goofily and took the hand Jaiden offered.

"We'll be back before eight at the latest." Carmen smiled and hugged me. "Take a bubble bath or something. Relax."

"Or call Aimee." Sammy shrugged.

Right.

…

I certainly will not.

"Have fun!"

"Bye mom, love you!"

"Bye Spencer, love you!" Dylan hollered and giggled when she was picked up by Sammy and carried out the door.

Finally, peace and quiet.

For now.

I finished making my cheese and cracker platter, for no reason, and placed it in the fridge.

A hot bath sounded good.

The place was spotless.

I needed to be doing something.

My phone rang, tearing me away from my thoughts. "Hello?"

"_Hey,"_ I heard the other voice, _"are you free tonight?"_

I looked around my empty house. I heard silence. "Uh, yea," I swallowed and leaned against the counter, "the girls just left with Jaiden."

"_Oh,"_ she breathed, _"can I come over?"_

Oh God, it really wasn't a good idea. I didn't know if I should…

"Yeah," I bit my lip, I was restless, "yes."

Great Carlin, what did you just do?

--


	34. Points Underneath

**Flashbacks are in **_italics. _

First flashback is from **Wash It All Away – Chapter 64: **_**Did That Just Happen?**_

_**Hold on tight ladies and gentlemen. We're in for one huge Spashley rollercoaster ride as the two finally discuss heartaches & inner demons. Enjoy!**_

**31 - ****Points Underneath**

**Ashley's PoV**

"Are you sure you don't find this weird?" I asked Spencer as she set a tray down on the coffee table with hot apple cider.

"Um," she shrugged and sat on the chair across from me, "a little." She admitted with a small smile. "I wasn't expecting a phone call from you, let alone a request to come over."

I took a sip of my drink after blowing on it and cast my eyes towards hers. "I wouldn't have been offended if you said it wasn't okay, Spencer." I whispered. "Everything is so…"

"Surreal?" Spencer asked and I nodded. "Is everything okay?" She asked so sweetly, taking a bite of one of the many assorted crackers on a plate.

"No." I simply replied. "I mean, here I am so happy that I almost have Dylan back in my life, you know? But then there's the fact that she's become such a big part of your family with Lucas. I witnessed that within the matter of two hours I was here last night and I just feel like I'm intruding."

Spencer's gaze held mine a little before she cleared her throat and putting her mug down. "You're not an intruder," she licked her lips and took interest in her bookshelf before glancing back at me, "Dylan is your daughter Ashley and despite what happened, she belongs with you. I feel quite privileged to take care of her for you."

I melted at her warm smile.

How was she so calm about this?

"How are you so calm?" I frowned slightly. "I think about this and I have to run to the bathroom or the nearest bush and puke my guts out."

Whoa, way to be forward Davies.

Spencer frowned in concern. "Is that healthy?"

"Nerves." I whispered and played with my fingers. "I think I'm broken."

"Broken?" Spencer smiled and stood. Oh my, she was coming my way. I felt the couch sink slightly as she sat beside me. "Where are you broken?"

"Everywhere." I answered honestly.

"I'm calm," she whispered and her eyes traveled over my face and down my neck before they dragged themselves back up again, "because there's no use getting upset over something that's inevitable."

"Aren't you upset at all?" I asked, this time I was the one checking her out. She had a scar above her right eyebrow and I frowned slightly. It looked like it could've been deep enough for stitches but Spencer was too stubborn for stitches.

"Of course I am," she sat back and looked around her toasty warm living room, "this is hard for me, don't think it's not. I've got a daughter who's about to go on a rampage and I've never seen her this upset before that it's rather nerve-racking. We've got secrets being kept from _us_ and from the one person we both thought we could trust," she sighed heavily, "and then I find out that the little girl I'm taking care of is none other than Ashley Davies daughter."

I stared at her because for the first time in years, I was witnessing an emotional breakdown in the blonde. She had a very strong shield built to mask her feelings but she looked like she was about to lose it.

"I'm not saying my life was hard after you," she finally let a tear fall, "but God it was almost unbearable when I realized that you were never coming back."

"But I did!" I sat up and looked at her. "I did Spencer and I told Alex to tell you I stopped by."

"Well I didn't get the message," she stood up and began to clear the tray off the table, "but I did get a post card that you sent to the whole family while I was away at school."

"Spencer, that's not fair." I choked out and followed her into the kitchen. "I... was stupid."

"You were!" Spencer snapped slightly. "God Ashley, you were so fucking blinded by fear back then that you couldn't even see that I was willing to drop everything to be with you."

I hung my head. As much as I didn't want to relive the past, I knew it needed to be done. It was part of the 'healing' process. "I can stand here and tell you that I just wanted you to live your dream but we both know that's a lie."

"Admitting it?" She raised an eyebrow and crossed her arms over her chest. "Was that proposal just an act? Those promises you made me, were they just words that were said in order to me feel special? Because I didn't feel special the moment they were broken."

I didn't want to think irrationally. I really didn't. But the blame was too heavy on my shoulders. "Why did you leave with her?"

"Her?" She laughed slightly. "Carmen? Because she was there for me when I was lying in pieces on the floor. Because I needed to be somewhere where I was wanted and God, why are you turning this around? I was hurt, Ashley."

I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. "This wasn't how this was supposed to go. I never wanted to make you angry."

Spencer blinked. "I'm not angry," she whispered, "I'm hurt. I'm confused and I'm just as lost as you are."

"You sound angry."

"No, you haven't seen me angry." Spencer said seriously. "I'm not bringing the past up to make things more awkward but I needed answers. I needed them a long time ago and I don't want to miss another chance."

"I'll answer anything." I tucked some hair behind my ears and she sighed, rubbing her eyes. She looked so tired and worn out. "But if you're tired, we can do this some other time…"

Spencer shook her head and pushed herself off the counter, making her way back into the living room. "We need this time to just really talk."

//

"_You promised you'd never break my heart." She finally whispered. Her eyes were no longer on mine and I felt my own heart drop to the icy ground beneath our feet. "You promised me." Her tone was desperate, just begging for me to piece her back together. "Yet here I am," she slowly slid the ring off her finger and I vaguely heard it drop to my feet, "broken."_

__

I stared down at my feet numbly, the white gold band glittering in all its glory.

"Go." She whispered, not moving.

"What?" I blinked and slowly picked up the ring.

_"Just go." Spencer nodded towards the exit door. "I'm not going to beg you if it means you have to think about __**us**__. Just leave." She said sharply, her eyes boring into my own._

__

"Spencer…"

_"Good luck tomorrow." Spencer whispered before turning around and skating off towards the locker room. I could hear her cries echoing off the walls and I crumpled to the cold surface, my own cries shaking my whole body._

//

"You scared me," I whispered, sinking down on the couch beside her, "I was eighteen, engaged and I had the most perfect girlfriend in my life. You were so perfect, Spencer. Every time you'd smile, every time you'd look at me or speak – you were the definition of perfection. And I was… not."

"I think you should've let me be the judge of that." Spencer shrugged and moved to light a few candles. "I thought you were perfect – for me."

"I'm sorry." The emotions running through my body brewed a storm in the pit of my stomach. I wanted to cry. Spencer hurt because of me. She carried all of it with her that whole time and just looking at her sad eyes made me want to hold her and tell her I'd try and do anything to make it better.

"Don't be sorry." Spencer sighed again. "The past is over with. I don't want to stand here and argue with you over things we simply can't change. I just wanted to understand and got caught up in the moment." She blushed a little.

"You're a pretty wild firecracker these days." I observed with a small grin, trying to lighten the mood. I still felt the tension in the air but it was slowly shifting and the shift felt like a good thing.

Spencer just smiled and took another sip of her drink. "You loved me, right?"

I stared at her and held my breath. I wasn't expecting that question. Not yet anyway. "I've never stopped." I whispered and didn't look her in the eye.

She nodded and put her mug down before curling her feet up underneath her. She turned to face me and studied my face. "What happened, Ash?" Her voice was so full of concern, it broke my heart.

What if she thought less of me?

"What do you mean?" I asked quietly. A lot had happened; I needed to know what she meant.

"I mean, everything, what happened? I know Dylan was your choice," she smiled lightly and shrugged a bit, "Sammy let it slip."

"Yeah, I just felt ready. It wasn't just about wanting someone to love or take care of, I just felt like it was time." I felt myself relax a little. "I tried for months before it took. Alex freaked on me." I said with an eye roll and noticed Spencer immediately looked away from me.

"When Alex found out I was pregnant, she took off. Well technically _I _took off because she was pissing me off." Spencer grabbed my hand to stop me from pacing and pulled me back down on the couch. "I didn't plan Lucas." She said seriously. "I went out to a party one night with Carmen and the next morning I woke up in a stranger's bed. Nine months later, out comes Luc."

"Oh." I frowned, not really sure how to take that information. "How old is Lucas?"

Spencer swallowed and breathed, "eleven."

"Oh." Okay. Breathe. You don't have a right to be… "Didn't take you long, did it?" Some things never change; I was still able to stuff my foot in my mouth.

"Don't." Spencer said sternly and pointed a finger at me. "Don't you dare say a word about my actions back then."

"I won't." I shrugged and turned to face the fireplace. "Does he have a part in Lucas' life?"

"No." Spencer stood up and grabbed a sweater, throwing it on. "I barely remember his name and the only reason why I remember his name was because he left me a note the morning afterwards."

"Gentleman like." I mocked with more jealousy then I intended too. I heard Spencer snort and I glared at her. "I'm allowed to be just a little upset about this." I said in a serious tone.

"No, you really don't and besides, I said I wasn't going to argue with over this past stuff."

"It takes nine months to have a baby and you were in bed with someone three months after I left you." Wow. Reword your words next time, Davies. I winced when I noticed her ears go red.

"Exactly. _You _left _me_." She grabbed her mug and nearly tossed it in the sink. "I should've just slept with Carmen when I had the chance, maybe it'd really give you a reason to be so jealous." I heard her mutter under her breath.

"You haven't?" I frowned a little. "Really?"

"You sound almost happy about that." Spencer shook her head. "Funny thing is, I couldn't sleep with her and we came so close one time. So close but I couldn't go through with it because it just felt like I was cheating on you. Because I told you I'd never touch her and I just, it would've been like a betrayal."

I didn't know what to say. I guess that was the night when we were going to spill everything out. Maybe it was a good thing. "I never slept with anyone until a little over a year ago."

Spencer looked at me like I had just grown another head. "Seriously?" She whispered wide-eyed.

I didn't know whether to be offended or not.

"Seriously." I nodded a little and looked away. "Why is that so hard to believe?" I asked with hesitancy.

Spencer shrugged and bit her lip. "I don't know? I guess maybe I assumed it to make myself feel better for um, not doing the same?" She whispered and played with her fingers in her lap.

"Katie was your last girlfriend that I've read about." I said quietly and scratched the back of my neck. Her eyes snapped up to look at me and I just shrugged a little. "I read about your break up in one of the Sport magazines."

"Oh." She whispered and tucked some hair behind her ears.

--

**Spencer's PoV**

"_So since I have to be in Germany next week, I was hoping we'd get to spend the weekend alone." Katie smiled at me, placing a kiss to the corner of my mouth._

"_Kate," I smiled a little, "I already promised my parents I'd be home for the weekend to spend time with Lucas."_

"_All weekend?" Katie raised an eyebrow and pulled away from me slightly. "Spencer, we see each other like, fifteen days out of a month and I miss you. My partner is getting the blunt end of the deal with my sexual frustration!"_

_I smirked at her a little. Katie was the best figure skater in her area and I had to admit she was hot doing her thing on the ice. Dressed in sexy costumes and being all flexible, it was very hot. She reminded me of a certain brunette that couldn't skate – but her name won't be mentioned. "Aww poor baby," I whispered against her lips and kissed her softly, "my parents love you, why don't you join me?"_

_Katie sighed and shrugged. "This is just… it's always like this and you know I love Lucas, Spence, but I barely get alone time with you."_

"_What do you want me to do?" I frowned. "I'm a mother Katie, and you knew that when we started going out. I have responsibilities and I intend to be the best mother I can be considering I'm rarely home with her."_

"_I get that," Katie pulled her brown hair in a small ponytail before clutching at her skating bag, "sometimes I wonder if this is even worth the effort." She mumbled._

_I shook my head and sighed, clutching at my own hockey bag. I was tired of the same constant argument. "Maybe you're right." I said, looking at her seriously. "I get where you're coming from but I'm not going to break Lucas' heart when her grandparents tell her that her mother isn't going to be seeing her."_

"_Looks like your decision is made." She said sadly and I shrugged._

"_There wasn't a decision to begin with." I tightened the strap on my bag and gave her one last look. _

"_Just walk away Spencer," Katie replied and moved away from me._

_I only nodded and complied._

_Never looking back._

//

"I guess she couldn't handle me wanting to be with Lucas." I shrugged and Ashley nodded a little. "It wasn't really a public break up but there were a few people outside the stadium in Toronto."

"I'm sorry?" Ashley raised an eyebrow with a slight nervous smile.

"Why?" I tilted my head. "She was my girlfriend for a year and I saw her a total of five months. It wasn't going to work out anyway – obviously."

"I know but she should've respected the fact that you were a mother." Ashley whispered.

I nodded a little and sat back against the couch. I didn't know what to think or feel at that moment. I was feeling all that hurt come back but then I was feeling relief that we were there, together, talking about everything. No matter how light or heavy, we were talking about it all.

"How did Dylan end up here?" I whispered softly, bringing my hands to her knees and getting her to look at me. "What went wrong?"

I could tell the subject was still fresh and painful for her. I didn't expect her to spill everything if it pained her. But she took a deep breath and rubbed her hands over her face before opening her mouth to speak. "The day I found out my parents died in an accident, I couldn't be alone. Dylan was my rock in life, you know? She was everything to me. But that day I had one drink, just one drink while picking her up from a birthday party and you know, the only thing that caused me to have that accident was the tears that just," she leaned forward holding her stomach. I frowned and moved closer to rub her back.

"You don't have to tell me," I whispered and she shook her head.

"I do," she looked at me with tears spilling from her beautiful eyes, "you need to hear it and I need to say it out loud again."

I only nodded and waited patiently while she composed herself.

"At the scene of the accident, they took some blood and did a breathalyser test. I had one beer Spence, just one and they took Dylan away because she was still in the vehicle with me while traces of alcohol was in my system," she sniffled, trying to take deep breaths between her words, "I promised her I'd be back. And I never came back."

"Oh Ashley," I sighed and finally moved as close as I could, wrapping an arm around her shoulder and pulling her towards me.

"If I just left her there or if I didn't have that drink." She sobbed softly and I continued rubbing her back lightly. "I don't know what happened after that, God, I can barely remember. I didn't make that first effort Spence, how horrible am I? I turned to alcohol and drugs before even considering on how to get her back. I just thought she was gone forever."

I closed my eyes. I've heard every story in the book in my line of work. I've been through all the stages of a social worker. I was even responsible for taking children out of their homes in the middle of the night when a phone call would come in. I've heard all of it. I've seen it – and it was painful. But to have Ashley's body quaking with tears in my arms, spilling out everything, was probably more personal to me. And I guess in a way, I could understand. She reacted how most mothers and the rare fathers, do. They turned to something that's less painful than reality.

"It wasn't until Aiden rescued me." Ashley whispered and I frowned, pulling back.

Aiden? I talked to Aiden and Kyla at least twice a month and they were planning a trip to see us that upcoming Christmas.

"Aiden?" I whispered back and she only nodded. Even through her tears, she was beautiful.

"I guess Alex confided in him about everything because she was worried about me." Ashley looked apologetic. "I'm actually kind of surprised she never asked you."

You and me both.

"Wow, so I really was in the dark with all of this." I nodded slowly.

"Kyla doesn't know as far as I know." Ashley blinked. "Aiden said he wouldn't say a word to anyone."

"Ashley," I couldn't help it but my forehead pressed against hers and my eyes were closed tightly, "it's important for you to know that I'm not mad," I whispered, "it's important for you to know that I understand and you have to realize that you've come a long way. I have Aiden to thank."

Ashley pulled back and wiped her eyes, her eyes so full of past pain and present fears. "I never wanted anyone to think less of me, especially you…"

"I don't." I whispered honestly. "God, I can't imagine what you went through losing your parents and daughter in one day," my arm was still draped around her shoulder and we both realized we were crying softly, "I wish I could've been there for you."

"Really?" She choked out.

"Yes." I breathed. "I told you, all I ever needed was you."

"How did we get here?" Ashley leaned back and I followed her, tucking my legs underneath me again. "I mean, if I wasn't so stupid we'd be here together, right?"

"We are here together." I whispered, giving her a soft smile.

I knew what she meant but she never corrected me.

I was getting really tired emotionally. Being a hockey mom slash Coach slash full time worker was enough to make me crash early, but throw in an emotional roller coaster ride with the love of your life, I could just sleep until the weekend.

"So," Ashley shifted and looked at me, "you don't do brunettes anymore?"

It didn't surprise me that our conversation was all over the place. I think it helped us get everything out. It goes to show how lost we were without each other.

"Ah," I blushed a little and shrugged, "the last brunette I was with was Katie, and that was nearly ten years ago."

"Who was that woman last night?"

"Aimee Smith." I sat up again, not really feeling comfortable talking about my non-committal relationships with Ashley at the moment.

"Girlfriend?" She whispered, chewing on her bottom lip.

"No," I shook my head and smiled a little, "I don't do girlfriends either."

"I guess some things do change." Ashley looked at me. "She seems really smitten with you."

Don't I know it.

"We have rules and she broke them." I stood up and stretched. "I'm not perfect by any means. I've never really taken the time out to find another woman to bring home and get to know Lucas. Heartaches are being tossed around here enough, she doesn't need to be attached to someone I'm not entirely serious about."

Ashley stood up and followed my stretch. "She doesn't like me." She said seriously.

"She doesn't know you," I offered, "Luc is eleven years old and she doesn't understand what's going on. All she knows is that her best friend's mother is back in town and it's hard on her to know that Dylan's out of our house within the next couple of weeks."

I was going to talk to Lucas after they got back from Rapture. I needed to sit her down and explain every little detail about _everything_. She was smart but she was emotional and temperamental – she believed what she wanted to believe.

"Spencer?" Ashley blinked her tired eyes and moved to grab her keys, pressing her command start button to warm up her vehicle. "I'm not going to ask for forgiveness because it's not right of me," she sighed heavily, "but know that the fact that you're so understanding means the world to me."

"There's nothing to forgive." I shrugged slightly and moved to grab her coat, placing it on her delicately. "If you know what you want in life right now," I took a deep breath, "just go for it Ash. Don't let anyone influence your decisions because you already know what it's like to lose things that are important to you."

Ashley stood there in front of me, just staring at me. "I want to join you ladies for dinner tomorrow night," she whispered.

"We'd love that." I nodded with a soft smile. Up until that moment, I was the one moving forward and giving her comforted hugs. But right now, Ashley had her lips pressed against my cheek so lightly, I could barely feel it. But I knew she was there.

We've been through so much.

"Thank you." She murmured against my cheek and squeezed my hand before I heard the front door open.

I heard it close while she slipped outside and tucked my bottom lip between my teeth.

Everything came back to me at that moment. The heartache, the laughter, the good memories, the sneaky showers in change rooms, the small petty arguments, the smiles and the kisses and touches – it was all there. Underneath all the points that built up our relationship, whether we were together or not, it was right in front of me.

And I realized something as it came rushing back to and through me…

…I was falling in love all over again.

--


	35. For Dylan

**32 - For Dylan**

**Spencer's PoV**

I watched as Lucas blew over her sketchpad, brushing away the eraser crumbs. Her tongue peeked out between her teeth as she scrunched her forehead into a frown, concentrating on her drawing. I peered over her shoulder and noticed it was a drawing of a teenage girl in hockey gear, with the number eleven perfectly situation of front of the sketched jersey.

"Nice drawing." I smiled and slid onto the stool beside her at the breakfast counter.

"Mom!" She screeched and tucked her book away quickly, a scowl donning her features. "You weren't supposed to see that."

"Oh," I nodded slowly and kissed her cheek, "well it's still good."

She blushed. "Thank you."

"So," I looked at the clock, "it's five-thirty in the morning and you're up… on a school day."

"I couldn't sleep." She shrugged and looked at me with her grey eyes. "Are you mad?"

"No." I smiled and ran my fingers through her brushed hair. "Just surprised."

"Dylan's really excited about tonight." Lucas smiled at me. "I think she's going to play really well."

"Me too." I moved to pour her some orange juice. "And to think, she'll get to have her mother there as well." There was no point dancing around the subject. The night before Jaiden walked in with a sleeping Dylan thrown over her shoulder and Carmen had a sleeping Lucas over her own. I wasn't able to talk to her about Ashley.

"Blah." Lucas sighed and threw her head forward, smacking it on the counter's surface. She didn't mumble an ow, she just sat there like that, staring at her socked covered feet.

"Baby," I leaned over and bumped her shoulder lightly, "I know this is hard for you. But you have to understand that I have no control over this and if I did," I bit my lip a little, "I still think Dylan deserves to have her mom."

That brought wide grey eyes to mine and she frowned deeply. "You said she was a keeper!"

My fault. I got caught up in the moment and I was about to pay for it.

"Mom!" She hopped off her stool. "You can't just let her take her! I know she did something bad!"

"Luc, you don't understand," I turned to face her, "Ashley's a great person. She was always a great person and something happened that caused her to lose Dylan. She was very upset about it and sad. She has the perfect opportunity to rebuild her life with her daughter and you know what?" I wanted to cry at the unshed tears filtering in Lucas' eyes, but she stood there, waiting for me to continue. "I spent time with Ashley last night and you know she said? She's scared of taking Dylan away from you."

I watched few emotions flicker across her face, as if she didn't know what to say. Finally, her famous frown and pout formed on her face. "Good." She said quietly and ran upstairs to her room.

That time she closed her door quietly.

I sighed and rolled my neck, moaning as it cracked.

"Rough morning?" Carmen said from behind me, placing a kiss on my cheek and then moved to grab herself a cup of coffee.

"Ugh." I groaned. "I don't know what to do."

Carmen shrugged and gave me a sympathetic look. "Maybe you shouldn't do anything, Spencey. You talked about the situation and she just wants her best friend to stay here. She's going to hear what she wants to hear."

How'd she get good at this parenting stuff?

"I'm so thankful you're here with me." I wrapped my arms around her. Aside from Ryn, Carmen had been my rock and in fact, she's been there since I gave birth to Lucas.

"Aww me too." Carmen sighed. She could be a softy and sweet when she wanted to be. "I love you, Spence."

I pulled back with a smile. "I love you too."

"Okay, enough of this bonding shit," she smirked and looked me up and down, "when are we gonna do it?"

"We always do it Carm," I laughed, "in your dreams."

"Blah," she made a face, "you're a tease in my dreams. You get me so worked up and that when I wake up I'm completely frustrated…"

"How is it that you don't have a girlfriend?" I frowned with a smirk. "It's not like you're ugly or don't have that charm oozing out of your ass."

"I know." Carmen rolled her eyes. "I attract all the young ones but never the Carlin."

"Ha." I laughed. "Whaaat about Sammy?"

Carmen swung around and looked at me. "Are for serious Carlin? Sammy? Alex's Sammy?"

"She hasn't been Alex's Sammy for years, Mandez." I shrugged. "Besides, you two would be a hot couple…"

"I have competition." Carmen chuckled. "Jaiden is all about Taylor right now."

I shrugged again and just shook my head.

It wasn't my business who hooked up with who.

As long as they left Ashley alone.

--

**Lucas' PoV**

I kicked my feet in the snow and looked around at everyone paying in the school yard. I just wanted to be alone. I didn't know why, but I wanted to be alone.

My frozen fingers gripped the pencil in my hand and my notebook in front of me. I couldn't draw of course, it was too cold. But I felt better with a pencil in my hand, it was comforting.

"Hey Lukey!" Dylan bounced next to me and plopped herself down on top of the snow pile I was sitting on. "Why aren't you playing?"

I shrugged and looked at her. It broke my heart to look at her and think that she would no longer be with me when _Ashley_ decided to take her away. "Why aren't you?" I asked softly.

"Cause I love playing with you." Dylan frowned slightly. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing." I closed my notebook and stared ahead at the other children playing on the swings.

"Liar." She smiled and sighed, adjusting her blue beanie hat.

"Do you love us?" I asked her softly and she looked confused.

"Yea."

"Do you want to leave us?" I asked again, digging my heel deeper into the soft snow.

"No." Dylan whispered and I finally caught her looking at me. "But I love my mommy."

I tried to understand, I really did. Everyone else around me thought that Ashley being back was a good thing.

I didn't.

Dylan chewed on her bottom lip and brushed a snowflake off my nose. "Lucas?" She cleared her throat and looked down at her fuzzy gloves for a brief second before looking up at me. "Are you going to hate me?"

"What?" I frowned and shook my head.

"When I leave with my mommy, are you going to hate me?" She started to cry, her bottom lip quivering.

"Dyl," I scooted closer to her and wrapped my arms around her in a big hug while she buried her cold face into my neck, "I could never hate you."

"But you hate my mom." She sniffled and I closed my eyes, squeezing her tighter.

"I don't like her." I admitted softly. "You're my best friend and I can't stand the thought of losing you, not now and not ever."

"But you won't lose me, Luc. I'll still be here." Dylan cried softly. "Please like my mommy, she's really nice…" she looked up at me, "she reminds me of Spencer."

I swallowed. My best friend was crying because of me and I didn't like it. I didn't like myself for the first time because maybe for the first time, I realized I was being selfish.

Something my mom taught me not to be.

"Does she like hockey like us?" I asked quietly and Dylan's face lightened up, nodding her head eagerly. "Can she skate?"

"Not very good." Dylan scrunched up her nose. "But she still tried and then I started helping her."

I had to grin a little and then became serious. "I don't like seeing you cry Dylan, it hurts my heart."

"I don't like seeing you sad either," she whispered, her hand rolling up a snowball, "hurts me too."

"Are you excited about tonight's game?" I asked with a smile.

"Yes!" She bounced up and started to jump up and down. "My mom is coming to dinner too, did you know that?"

My mom was right. This Ashley made my Dylan happy and I tried to push back every sad and jealous feeling in myself to show her I was happy for her. "I know, maybe Ephiny and Chase will let her play the piano."

"She loves playing the piano." Dylan nodded again before settling her butt back down on the cold pile of snow next to me.

I just smiled and grabbed her gloved hand, squeezing it in my own.

I took a deep breath.

I could do this.

For Dylan.

--


	36. The Hockey Moms

**33 - The Hockey Moms**

**Ashley's PoV**

It was snowing big flakes outside and I watched as they landed on the ground, giving the ground a more 'cleaner' visual to it. I locked my car door and bit my lip, stuffing my hands into my pockets, walking towards the entrance of the café.

I noticed they were already inside. I could see Spencer's smile from a mile away as she watched the girls tell a story. I took a deep breath and opened the door, cringing inwardly as the chimes went off.

All eyes were on me.

"Mommy!" Dylan scurried out of the booth and ran to me, flinging her arms around my neck as I bent down to pick her up. She wrapped her legs around my waist and I closed my eyes, feeling content instantly.

"Hey you," I whispered and she pulled back, grinning like a big girl, "how was your day?"

"Good," she nodded, "I already did my homework and Spencer let me have ice cream before dinner."

"Hey now," Spencer was suddenly standing beside me, "we were supposed to keep that a secret."

I raised an eyebrow and smirked a little when Dylan blushed. "Ah, don't take it personally Spencer; Dylan could never hide anything from me."

"Sorry Spencer." My daughter murmured cutely and smiled when Spencer kissed her on the cheek.

"We saved a spot for you," Spencer ushered us over to the booth, "I ordered you a Coke, hope you don't mind."

I shook my head, thanking her softly. I slid into the booth next to Dylan and sat across from Lucas, who was looking at me with a small smile. "Hi Miss Davies," she whispered.

I smiled back. "Hi Miss Carlin."

Lucas smiled even bigger and bit her lip. "Dylan's excited about our game."

"I am." Dylan agreed, taking a sip of her strawberry-kiwi juice.

"Well so am I." I said softly and shared a look with Spencer.

"Okay so I know that I shouldn't ask you this right now but do you think I can skip practice tomorrow Spencer?" I heard that familiar teenage voice come charging through the front of the store. She reached the table and immediately stopped, looking between me and Spencer. "Damn, I always interrupt these important moments."

"Bad word." Dylan raised an eyebrow and beamed a grin at Lucas, who high fived her. She was tossed a dollar coin and squealed.

"Every time one of us says a bad word, we owe the girls a dollar." Spencer explained and I nodded slowly, smiling. "So Jai, why'd you want to skip practice tomorrow?"

"Uh," she cleared her throat, "because I'm thinking about sleeping in?"

Sounded like Spencer when she was in school.

"Oh God come on Coach!" Jaiden whined and fell to her knees, giving Spencer a pout. "I have a huge test tomorrow in science and I'm already flunking it. I just wanted to pull an all nighter."

"Yo Wynters!" I heard a voice from the entrance. "Are we still on for that party tonight?"

Jaiden's face paled.

"See you at practice tomorrow." Spencer said seriously.

"Goddamnit!" Jaiden yelled slightly. "Jyll! I told you I had it covered!"

"Bad word." Lucas whispered and smiled at the teenager, batting her long eyelashes.

"You're lucky you're young and cute," Jaiden mumbled and tossed another loonie out of her pocket.

"And you're going to be working the rest of the night." Ephiny flung a towel at Jaiden as she walked by us to grab another table of customers.

Jaiden bit her lip hard before sighing heavily. "Well then, I can't go to a party, I have to work now and I'm still going to practice in the morning," she looked at the girls, "do you know the moral of this story?"

"Don't lie." Lucas shrugged.

Spencer and I chuckled quietly. Lucas was a smart one and fast with her words – just like her mother.

"Right." Jaiden nodded and sighed heavily, waving off her girlfriend. "So what can I get you lovely people?" She took off her coat and blew hair out of her face.

"Nachos please!" Lucas grinned and looked at Dylan, "with extra sour cream, right Dyl?"

"Yes please." Dylan grinned up at me. Wow, the girls had manners. I sighed and looked at Spencer, damn she was still the woman of my dreams. Perfect in every way.

Even her flaws.

Because the lesbian God knew I was not perfect either.

"You should try the nachos," Lucas looked at me, "they're really good here."

Spencer nodded in agreement. "I'll have them too."

That was that then.

"Make that four." I smiled at Jaiden and she jotted it down before someone caught her eye at the entrance.

"Ahh, if it isn't the Davies-Carlin family!" I liked the sound of that. Carmen grinned as she approached us with Sammy with her. "And lil Jai."

"Bite me." Jaiden sighed, as if she were bored. "Hey Taylor," she grinned and caught the gaze of the older woman, "wanna hook up?"

"Sure," Sammy smiled softly, "I'll read you a bedtime story."

Dylan chuckled beside me and curled into my side, her hand on my leg.

Jaiden just smiled and walked away.

"We're not here to interrupt," Carmen looked at me when she said that, "we just wanted to come ask if it's okay that we see Dylan's first game."

"Why wouldn't it be?" Spencer asked, looking up at _her_ best friend. Their friendship and being as close as they were, was no surprise. Carmen had been there for Spencer since the very beginning, even when I was in the picture back in high school. She had a sense of loyalty in her that I hadn't possessed back then. I was hoping I could make that change.

"Well because I wasn't sure if Ashley-"

"You're welcome to go," I softly interrupted, "you're a part of Dyl's life as well."

She was.

"Aunt Carmen taught Dylan a few moves to be a goalie." Lucas grinned proudly.

"Eh," Carmen nudged my shoulder, "your kid's a natural hockey player. I barely had to teach her a thing."

Dylan blushed and beamed up at me proudly. I kissed her forehead. "I can't wait to see you play."

"So not fair," Jaiden laid out some napkins and extra sour cream on the table, "I have to work and I can't even see my two favourite hockey girls play."

"Then you shouldn't lie." Lucas reminded her.

Spencer smiled and took a sip of her Dr. Pepper. "So Ashley, how was your day?"

I blushed a little and cleared my throat. She was asking me how my day was and it made me feel … alive and special. Feelings I hadn't felt for the longest time. Yet somehow Spencer could make me feel all that and more with just one look.

But the one thing I couldn't say kept repeating itself in my head.

_Lonely without you._

"It's much better now, thank you."

And we shared another smile.

­­­--

"Come on." Spencer nudged my shoulder and pulled me towards the team's box. "I think you need to experience this up close and personal."

"Oh God," I breathed, "I'm so nervous, what if Dyl gets hurt?"

Spencer raised an eyebrow at me. "Then you clearly don't know her strategy in this sport."

"What exactly is her strategy?" I asked sceptically.

"Kill 'em with kindness." Spencer laughed and blew her whistle. "Okay team, gather around!" I stood there in the middle of all the children, listening to everything the Coach had to say.

And I had to say that the whole Coach side of Spencer was a real turn on. Her hair was down and slightly wavy, her black 'Coach' jacket was unzipped, revealing her tight black sweater underneath.

"Davies, take it easy out there," she teased, "we wouldn't want to give your mom a heart attack."

Dylan and Lucas erupted into giggles.

"Thanks." I murmured and Spencer just smiled at me. Dylan placed her head gear on and tapped me on the leg. I knelt down and she moved her lips to whisper in my ear, "kiss her." And she skated off with Lucas and the rest of the team.

I think I was blushing. I was glad no one else heard Dylan.

"Welcome to the world of being a hockey mom." Coach Carlin grinned before blowing her whistle and getting the girls ready for warm up.

I sighed contently. I wasn't only a mother, I was a hockey mom.

I was finally feeling like I could settle down.

Maybe Kenora had a spot for me in it.

** --**


	37. Musician vs Rock Star

**Flashback is in **_italics._

Welcome back Alexis Carlin. Some of you may understand Alex, some of you may not. Either way, she's pretty much the kinda girl you either love or hate. There's no inbetween.

**34 - Musician vs Rock Star**

**Alex's PoV**

_Heavy breathing filtered the air and I released a long moan as she collapsed on top of me. It had been a year since I'd last seen her and God it felt good to 'see' her again. Her lips kissed my face and then stopped when they reached my mouth. "I've missed you," she whispered so quietly before capturing my lips in a deeper kiss._

__

I missed her too. But I couldn't tell her that. I turned my head to look over at the clock that was perched neatly on a small shelf in my tour bus 'room'. "I have to be in there in thirty minutes." I sat up slightly, and looked around to find a shirt.

"So be late," she groaned and moved to kiss my shoulder, "you're a big bad rock star, you can be late once in a while."

I had to smirk and then gasp as teeth sunk into my neck, nipping a biting slowly. "I really need-"

"-to be with me." She said seriously and pushed me back down, hovering over me. "Alexis," she sighed and kissed me again, "God I spent so many nights just... pining over you and walking away was the hardest thing I had to do." Her fingers tracing lightly over the inside of my thigh and then cupping me lightly.

I swallowed and bit my bottom lip, not wanting to get lost in those beautiful blue eyes. "Samantha," I breathed her name and she slipped further into me. I was lost in her.

All of her.

"Knock knock!" We heard from the front of the bus and panic rose in my eyes.

"Fuck!" I sat up quickly and threw Sammy her clothes while trying to tug mine on. I knew that voice coming down the hallway.

"Alex, what's going on?" Sammy asked me with a deep frown. "Who is that?"

God, I so didn't need that at the moment.

"Alex! Are you in there?" Her voice was getting closer and I realized I was busted. There was nowhere to run. I managed to pull a tank top over my head before the small sliding door opened and brown eyes locked with mine before they fell on Sammy. I watched her face fall and I exhaled slowly. "What is this?" Tracey asked and backed out of the room, covering her face before glaring at me. "What is this?!"

Yep, Tracey was my girlfriend of five months.

Sammy gave me a confused look and pulled on her jeans before pulling her messy hair back in a ponytail. "What's going on?" She looked at me and my heart dropped.

I remained quiet, not being able to find my voice.

"Answer me." Tracey said, her eyes hazy and Sammy's glistening.

"I'm sorry." I whispered and then felt myself being shoved hard against and pinned against the wall by Sam. She didn't care if I looked scared, she was pissed and hurt.

"How could you?" She hissed and then tightened her fists into a ball on either side of my head. "Who the fuck are you, Alex?" Sammy shook her head, tears streaming down her face. She turned to face Tracey. "I'm so sorry, I didn't know you two were-"

"We're over." Tracey coldly said as she threw a bouquet of roses on my messed up bed and slammed the sliding door.

I felt numb.

And dirty.

"I don't even know you anymore." Sammy frowned deeply and grabbed her coat, tugging it on.

"You knew me well enough to fuck me." I spat. I was angry and I had no one else to take it out on. I was angry at myself.

I felt a hard slap against my cheek and blue eyes blazing with anger.

"Go to hell, Carlin." Samantha Taylor whispered and grabbed her purse, walking away.

_For the second and very last time._

_ //_

"What's on your mind?" Tracey asked softly, rubbing my scalp as we were on our way to Montreal for another concert.

"Everything." I replied honestly.

"That's a world full of 'everything's' baby." She chuckled and kissed my temple while I looked out the window of my bus, watching the scenery rush by.

"Do you think they'll forgive me?" I asked quietly, biting my nails slightly. I closed my eyes when I heard her exhale slowly.

"I don't know," she replied honestly, "but the best you can do is just grovel and tell them how sorry you are," she bit her lip and looked at me, "I forgave you."

Don't remind me.

"I know." I sighed. "I hate myself."

"You'll learn to love yourself once again if you just stop thinking about yourself for once."

I sat up and glared at her. It was hard to stay pissed at Tracey as she smiled at me; she smiled because she knew that I knew that she was right.

"It's just that you've still got a big head." Tracey shrugged and raised an eyebrow. "I bet you didn't think that any of this would fall back on you when it completely backfired."

"But my dad told me not to say anything!" I reasoned.

"Alex," she sighed and gave me that 'you can't be serious' look, "you could've said something even before Ashley got into the accident. You could've said something even before Dylan was born – you know, about Lucas. I try to understand your reasoning behind why you felt the need to keep it a secret but I can't. Not completely, anyway."

"I just thought it'd be easier." I frowned, all of a sudden my head was fuzzy, not really understanding it myself.

"For who? You or them?" Tracey patted my leg and stood up, walking towards the small fridge and grabbing a beer.

"What is that supposed to mean?" I scowled defensively.

"Maybe you're the one that didn't want to share your perfect day life with your perfect night life. You had them both close to you and you knew that if they got together again, you'd be left out," she looked around the moving bus, "kind of like now."

I blinked and stood up, shaking my head. "That's not it at all!"

"Hey," her brown eyes looked at me softly, "I'm not judging you, Al, I just know you more than you like to think so."

"Why would I want to keep them apart?" I crossed my arms over my chest and looked at her curiously.

"Simple," Tracey expertly popped the cap off her beer bottle and took a sip, "you were needed by both of them and if they were to reunite, you'd no longer be needed."

Huh.

Really?

"No." I scratched my forehead and shook my head. "No, that's not it."

Tracey shrugged and sat back down on the plush couch. "It's kind of like what happened with you and Sam," she spoke softly, "you wanted us both. You want things you can't have Alex and you do everything in your power to get it. You don't mean to hurt people along the way but you do handle things carelessly."

I glared at her. "What happened between you, me and Sammy has nothing to do with Spencer and Ashley."

"True, but you wanted Sammy back in your life and you wanted me in your life. You wanted Ashley in your life and you wanted Spencer in your life. You held onto so many different worlds to keep them apart just so you didn't have to feel… unwanted."

I scoffed and opened my own beer bottle. "I've changed."

I think I've changed.

I wanted to change.

I didn't want to be that person everyone talked about behind their back.

I wanted to be Alex Carlin – Musician.

Not Alex Carlin – Rock Star.

"I'm going to bed." I said and quickly finished off my beer before throwing the bottle in the garbage.

"I didn't mean to upset you," Tracey shot up and grabbed my arm, placing her arms around my neck, "I'm sorry."

I pressed my forehead against hers and closed my eyes. "You didn't baby," I whispered honestly, "you just made me see things I tried to avoid." I kissed her softly before untangling myself from her arms.

I had to make things right again.

** --**

**_So I just wanted to clear something up, or at least try! Dylan Davies... at first when she was under Spencer's care, she did go by Avery. As Ashley's last name changed officially back to Davies, so did Dylan's. It was merely mentioned in an early chapter though not elaborated on! So I apologies for those who were a little confused. I sometimes wonder how I manage to keep certain facts straight lol!_**


	38. It Kind Of Tickled

**35.1 - It Kind Of Tickled**

**Spencer's PoV**

"Go Dylan!" Ashley screamed as her daughter stole the puck away from another player and scooted down the rink. I smiled at the situation. I remember when she'd get into my games like that – it only made me show off more though.

The rules were different in the younger group. There was no touching allowed with the other team mates, so when Dylan was shoved into the boards by a slightly larger player, Ashley flipped. She was red and ready to bust a cap in someone's ass.

"Ash," I pulled her back and gripped her shoulder, "calm down." I whispered as soon as Dylan made her way into the team box. "Hey my girl, are you okay?" I knelt down and she grinned, nodding.

"It kind of tickled." Dylan shrugged and took of her helmet. Ashley was there beside her, wiping sweaty curls away from the little girl's forehead. "Mommy, I'm fine." She giggled as Ashley thoroughly checked her over as much as she could.

"Dyl! You okay?" Lucas skated towards us out of breath and pulled her mask up. She got the thumbs up from the young Davies and they gave each other a high five before Lucas took off down the ice.

"Can I go back out there?" Dylan asked me with a pout. I looked at Ashley, who bit her lip.

"Just sit for a few minutes," I smiled softly and patted her head.

Ashley mouthed me a 'thank you' and I nodded, going back to watching the game. Three minutes later, the skater from the other team that pushed Dylan was back out on the ice along with Dylan herself.

"Carlin!" I heard the referee holler and I closed my eyes tightly, knowing exactly what had happened. Lucas was being escorted to the penalty box.

"She just totally tripped that player." Ashley said wide-eyed.

"No one messes with Dylan." I shrugged and shook my head at my daughter as she blushed and hung her head.

Secretly these moments made me proud but people would find it rather odd. The only reason why I felt proud was because Lucas only had Dylan's best interest at heart. But I still made it clear that it was wrong – no matter how proud I was.

My team was up by two goals, making it 5 – 2. One of those goals was from Dylan and two from Lucas. I was proud and by the look in Ashley's face, she was proud too.

Finally the game came to an end and the team was excited that they won yet again. "Well now, who's the best team in Kenora?" I beamed as they laughed all the way to the change rooms after shaking hands with the other team.

Ashley stopped outside the door of the change room and I raised an eyebrow while other parents pushed between us to help their children get ready for home. "You can come in." I smiled and pushed the door open wider.

"Spencer," Ashley grabbed my hand and stared at me, "thank you."

"Don't thank me." I said seriously with a hint of a grin. "Please."

"Miss Davies, did you see that slap shot?!" Lucas squealed, ripping off her jersey and throwing it in her small gym bag. "Wow, right? That was awesome!"

Ashley's eyes glowed with amazement as my daughter spoke to her. I told her she'd come around. And so did Dylan for that matter.

"Did you teach her that?" Ashley asked, smiling.

"Yes!" Lucas beamed and wrapped an arm around Dylan's shoulder. "Can we go for ice cream?"

"Uh," I cleared my throat, "well honey," I pulled Lucas aside and brushed my lips against her forehead, "you and I can go for ice cream but I think Ashley and Dylan should be alone for a bit."

Lucas stopped smiling and scrunched her face up. "What?"

"Just for a little bit and then Dylan will come back home." I ran my fingers through her hair and she scowled but sighed, defeated.

"You promise Dyl will be there when I wake up tomorrow?" Her grey eyes blinked and her lips pouted.

"I promise, baby." I whispered and she hugged my waist.

"Can we go to Rapture?" Lucas smiled again. "I want Jaiden to make me her famous Lucas-Sundae!"

I laughed and nodded. "Now go get changed and washed up."

I turned around to find Ashley standing behind me, her head tilted and a small smile playing on her lips.

"What?" I blushed and she just shook her head, laughing softly. "Ashley, what?" I smirked.

"You're a really good mom." She finally said and licked her lips. "I'm really happy Dylan was placed in your care, Spence."

"Me too." I agreed and I had to thank my dad for that one after I cooled off from being angry at him and my sister. "So I think this calls for celebration," I stuffed my hands in my pockets, "why don't you take Dylan for a bit. Spend some time alone with her without anyone to pry."

A shocked look ran over her features. "Really?"

"Yes," I nodded and waved bye to a few parents that scooted their daughters out of the room, "Luc and I are going to Rapture for a bit and then I'm getting her home so she can bath before bed."

"Oh God Spence," Ashley breathed and held a hand up to her chest, "this means so much to me."

_I love see you happy, Ash._

"But I need her back by nine, it's a school night." I scolded playfully and Ashley nodded her head.

"Nine's good."

"Mommy!" Dylan came running out of the change stall in her sweater and black pants. "Do you have to go now?"

"No," Ashley smiled and squeezed her daughter, "I'm going to take you out for a treat."

Dylan's eyes lit up and she clapped her hands.

Lucas came out of the other stall in her jeans and hoodie. "Ready mom?" She asked me, taking my hand into her own. God she was trying so hard to be happy for Dylan.

We were the last out of the arena and I grabbed Lucas and Dylan's hockey gear. "Have fun you two." I smiled at both brunettes.

"See you at home Lukey!" Dylan yelled across the parking lot, laughing as Ashley picked her up and spun her around a bit.

Both of us blondes sighed as she got into the vehicle.

Our night was bound to be a little quiet without Dylan's insanely cute stories.

And a rather gorgeous brunette to check out.

"Rapture?" I asked her, squeezing her small cold hand in mine.

"Rapture." Lucas nodded and smiled as we pulled out of the parking lot.

**--**


	39. So Many Questions, So Little Answers

_Well, not sure how many of you will be interested but I started a Livejournal. I've posted a picture of The Wynters family as well as the Wish You Were video.  
My lj name is: darkened_taboo  
_

_You'll have to excuse my ramblings if you add me as a friend. I usually babble a lot in my entries once I get going! Anyway, enjoy this chapter. We're getting hotter with a REAL Spashley reunion! _

_I don't own SoN!_

**35.2 - So Many Questions - So Little Answers**

**Ashley's PoV**

I wasn't a fast food type of person; but it turned out Dylan was and she loved her Happy Meals at McDonalds. I used to take her at least once a week for breakfast but not really for dinner. I loved to cook and she loved my cooking.

But considering the occasion, it was an exception. "How are the nuggets?" I asked, sipping on a coffee, nibbling on the fries.

"Good." Dylan grinned and held out one for me. "Want one?"

I took a bite just to watch her eyes shine brightly. She loved to share. "Thank you," I smiled after chewing. "So how was school today?"

"Really good," she smiled and took a sip of her apple juice, "we learned new multiplications and I have a spelling bee next week. Mrs. Bechard said that I made it to the finals."

"Oh Dyl, that's awesome." I grinned and she beamed even brighter. "I'm so proud of you."

"Lucas and I played at recess," she changed the subject and wiped her mouth politely after dripping sauce into the table, "Mom?"

"Hmm?" I leaned forward, completely focused on her worried look.

"When do I get to live with you?" Her small frown turned into more of a scared expression.

"Soon baby," I whispered, "just a couple more weeks."

She nodded, her curls bobbing around her head. "Mom?" She looked at me again.

"What?" I asked softly.

"I don't want to leave here." Dylan whispered, swallowing hard. "I like it here with Lucas and Spencer. I don't want to leave them."

I stared at her for a few seconds before dropping the fry that was in my hand, on the tray. "Dylan," I bit my lip, "right now, we're not leaving them."

"Not ever." She scowled and for the first time I noticed that hurt rise inside her eyes. "They're family."

"I know." I had to agree. "They're perfect."

"Yeah." Dylan sighed and began to eat slowly again. "Mom?"

Yes, I missed my Dylan. Always asking questions but never getting upset if I didn't know the answers.

"Dyl?" I smiled and she giggled.

"I love you."

I moved to wrap her up in my arms. "I love you too."

**--**

**Spencer's PoV**

_"Believe me, you can stray if you feel alone but I'd rather be yours to drown in…" _Lucas sang as sketched in her book while sitting in Rapture. "Why does Auntie Alex write all the sad songs?" She lifted her head up and looked at me with curiosity.

"I don't know." I mumbled and continued to read an article in Sports Illustrated.

"Where is she?" She asked, closing her sketchbook. I could feel her eyes burning into me. "Why did she go back on tour anyway?"

"She loves her music." I sighed, not really wanting to get into it with my daughter about her Aunt Alex.

"You're mad at her aren't you? Your ears are turning red." Lucas pointed out and I smirked.

"Why don't you finish your sundae so we can get home and into bed." I tapped the table and she huffed. "What Luc?" I sighed.

"You're mad, why?"

"I don't want to talk about it." I said firmly and placed the magazine I was reading aside. "Now's not the time."

Lucas stared at me with her grey eyes before she finally looked away, shrugging. "Can Dylan and I go to Jason's birthday party next weekend?"

"Did you get an invite?" I asked lightly and she nodded, telling me it was in her bag at home. "I'll call his parents and find out the details."

"Okay." Lucas smiled and her lips drew into a bigger one when Jaiden slid in next to her.

"Save me Lucas! My parents are slave drivers!" Jaiden pouted at my daughter.

"Chase! Ephiny!" Lucas called out and the married couple looked at her. "Jai's taking five!"

I chuckled as they laughed and nodded.

"I love you!" Jaiden grinned and kissed the little blonde's cheek.

Lucas blushed and looked away slightly.

"See, that's what you get for lying." I raised an eyebrow and took a sip of my Dr. Pepper.

Fuck, Dr. Pepper was my weak spot.

Aside from Ashley, of course. I'd drink her in any day.

I smirked as the thought ran through my head and soon it was getting way too rated NC 17 so I had to force myself to stop thinking about her.

"So Spence," Jaiden cast her eyes downwards before catching my gaze again, "how do you break up with a girl?"

What?

"Um, what?" I leaned forward and frowned. "Jyll's a beautiful person."

"Yea," she sighed and smiled, "she's beautiful and great between the shee- ow!" Jaiden scowled as my foot connected with her shin. Her eyes widened as Lucas stared at her. "Oh Spence, I'm so sorry." She whispered.

"Between the what?!" Lucas insisted with a confused expression.

"She's great between all my free time?" Jaiden covered up, badly.

Lucas shrugged her shoulders and went back to her sketchpad.

"It's just that lately I haven't been feeling it, you know? Jyll's great but I find myself liking someone else." The teenager sighed. "So, how do you break up with a girlfriend?"

She was asking me? I was dumped before graduation. I was told to walk away after saying I had a daughter. I was no longer that commitment type of woman. Aimee couldn't take a hint.

"You're asking the wrong person." I bit my lip with a sympathetic shrug.

"Well," Lucas straightened herself up and looked at her 'hero', her 'idol', her five year 'crush', "maybe you should just tell the truth. Right mom?"

I chuckled and nodded. "Yea, exactly what I said."

"Whatever, you so did not. I'm getting break-up advice from an eleven year old." Jaiden smiled and looked at the girl next to her. "Ya think I should?"

"Yep."

"Okay then." Jaiden nodded firmly with a grin.

"Who's the other girl?" I asked with a teasing smile.

"Is your sundae good?" She ignored me and spoke to Lucas.

Huh. Interesting.

Jaiden never held out information with me. I was like her only yet cool older sister. She shared things with me.

She lost her virginity to a girl named Heidi when she was fifteen. She also had a pregnancy scare last year with a guy name Justin or Jake or Jude, not sure about his name – all I knew was that I wanted to rip his balls off for leaving town when she told him about it.

Jaiden was more than just family with Luc and I. She was a lifesaver. She helped Lucas adjust through her young years and took her under her wing, promising she'd always protect Luc from everything and everyone bad.

Maybe she just didn't want to say in front of Lucas.

"I gotta go to the washroom." Lucas scooted over Jaiden's lap and took off down the hallway in the back.

"Who is she?" I whispered again, yet she remained quiet. "Oh God, is it a guy?" I sat back and stared at her.

"Gross, no." She shook her head and sighed heavily. "I can't say."

"Are you already seeing her and she's not out?"

I loved guessing games.

"Oh she's out alright," Jaiden chuckled.

"Hmm," I tapped my finger on my chin.

"Sammy." She whispered, blushing deeply.

"Oh." I breathed and slid down in my seat. "Oh."

"You said that already." Jaiden laughed nervously.

"Sammy? Samantha Taylor?" I asked and she nodded. "Oh."

"Forget it." Jaiden sighed and stood up. "I know there's no chance in hell seeing as she's hella older than I am, but I just didn't think it was fair to Jyll."

I watched her walk away.

Wow.

Carmen was right.

Interesting.

**--**


	40. Stupid Yes, Asshole No

**Flashback is in **_italics. _**Flashback was taken from **Wash It All Away – _**Chapter 6.1: Walk The Distance**_

**36 - Stupid Yes – Asshole No**

**Ashley's PoV**

_"What took you so long?" I breathed and didn't wait for an answer. My hands tightened their grip in her hair as I felt her tongue trace tentatively against my lower lip. All I could do was groan deep in my throat and grant her access. She tasted like vanilla. Sweet. I sucked on her tongue briefly before releasing it and allowing mine to explore. Her hands scratched down my back over my shirt material and grabbed my ass._

__

I gasped against her mouth and felt her grin into the kiss as my legs instinctively wrapped around her waist.

Spencer didn't break the lip contact as she cupped my ass and lifted me off the desk, carrying me the short distance to the bed. Fuck she was strong.

I felt my back hit the soft mattress and her body immediately covered my own. Her lips were now trailing down my jaw, her left hand was cupping my hip. "I'm so addicted to you," she breathed hotly into my ear and it made my centre gush. I bit my lip and growled as her lips wrapped around my earlobe, sucking softly.

My hands slid underneath her shirt, her back was so soft. I felt her body shiver slightly as my fingers grazed her bare sides. She fused her lips back to mine, her tongue demanding entrance.

_Jesus, Spencer could kiss._

//

I kissed her forehead and pulled the covers up to her chin, watching her for a few more seconds before standing up. "Night Baby Dyl." I smiled as she sighed and turned onto her side, getting comfortable in her sleep.

I closed the door and leaned against it. I caught a glimpse of Lucas sleeping in her own bed, wishing I could go in there and wish her a goodnight as well.

I just wasn't sure if it'd be awkward or not. She wasn't my daughter.

"Hey," Spencer's voice came softly from the top of the stairs, "everything okay?"

I nodded with a big smile. I got to spend time with Dylan alone and it was amazing. "Perfect."

"Did you want to stay for a bit?" She asked me as we made our way quietly down the stairs.

"Actually," I sighed and bit my lip, "I promised Chelsea I'd hang out with her before she leaves this weekend."

"Ah, yes." Spencer nodded with a small smile. "Friday's the big day."

Friday I'd officially have Dylan back in my own care. I was excited and Lucas seemed to have warmed up to the idea once I promised them I wasn't going anywhere until the end of the month. My job in Thunder Bay was on hold until I was certain I was going to do the right thing.

And every night for a week and a half since Dylan's hockey game, I was at Spencer's tucking her in. Four nights out of eight, Jaiden was babysitting Lucas while Spencer had her work to attend too. It was a disappointment to find the blonde gone when I dropped Dylan off those nights.

"Maybe tomorrow?" I asked, biting my lip.

"They have hockey and then I have to Coach Jaiden's team." Spencer looked down and clapped her hands together. "Come on," she sighed softly, "just stay for like, ten more minutes," her lips turned into an adorable pout, "please?"

"Ugh," I teased her, rolling my eyes, "you and your adorableness."

Spencer beamed as I slid onto the couch, facing the fire that was going lowly in the fireplace. "You could never resist that pout."

"Yea," I smirked, "Lucas perfected it just like you."

"Oh God I know." Spencer laughed. "She can get away with so much if I'm not around. Jaiden will give in so easily once the Carlin pout comes out."

"Can't say I blame her." I chuckled and glanced at Spencer's profile. I couldn't resist the urge to reach out and touch her. My thumb trembled slightly over the scar above her eyebrow, she jumped a little and then looked at me. Our eyes locked and we stayed like that for a few minutes, just… looking. "What happened?" I whispered, my thumb mapping out the scar gently, never leaving her eyes.

"Fight." Spencer blushed. "I was actually trying to break it up between Carmen and this girl on my team back in college."

"Oh." I frowned and trailed my fingers down her temple, to her cheek and down her neck. "I've missed you." I couldn't help it. I did. I wanted her to know that.

Spencer closed her eyes and took a deep breath before opening them. "You have no idea," she breathed. Her hand reached mine, the one that was resting lightly against her shoulder, and she kissed the back of it, "sometimes I think this is really crazy. You and me, here together again. I'd like to think I got over you," her hands cupped my face when I lowered my head and brought our eyes back to eye level, "but clearly I haven't because every time I look at you, I just want to kiss you to help mend the pain."

"Spencer, I'm so sorry." Finally that final wave of emotion came down on me and I broke out into tears. "I didn't mean to cause you so much pain, I swear. I'm an asshole." I stared at her as she laughed and shook her head, wiping my tears away.

"You're not an asshole," she whispered and tucked her bottom lip between her teeth, "stupid yes, asshole no."

I cracked a smile and rubbed my face, hating myself for the small break down. "Dylan loves it here," I said in a quiet voice, "she doesn't want to leave. She can't stand the thought of leaving Kenora."

"Ash," Spencer sat back and tilted her head to the side, "everyone thinks that I'm taking this whole thing really well when in reality, all I want to do is break down and just, cry for days. Dyl's become a huge part of us and Lucas is so in love with your daughter. And I don't mean _in love_, I just mean that they are so close, closer than close." She moved to face me a little more. "I'd by lying if I said that seeing her leave isn't killing me inside but what makes it better is knowing _who _she's going home too."

I melted when she stared at me, her hand caressing mine lightly. "I don't know what to do."

"Whatever you have to," she replied and blew a strand of hair out of her face, "you have to do it for you though."

I nodded and swallowed.

I'd be leaving so much behind if I decided to go back to Thunder Bay. My plan was to actually head back to BC and take care of my parents' estate. Their house was left in my name along with their inheritance money – it was perfect for starting over. However knowing exactly who I was going to leave behind, conflicted everything I had ever dreamed of.

Of course having Spencer back in my life _was_ more than I ever dreamed of. To have her talking to me, touching me, looking at me with those bluish grey eyes that shared so much emotion in them; I didn't want to let that all go again.

And our daughters!

Our daughters are the best of friends, they are sisters and you know, I thought that it was just a coincidence. But it wasn't. Dylan led me here. She led me to Spencer and seeing how she developed a deep relationship with Lucas, showed me that there was more to the story that was unfolding before us.

"It's been ten minutes." Spencer smiled and let go of my hand, standing up. "I should let you get back to Chelsea."

I pouted but stood up, grabbing my coat. I was tempted to call Chelsea and tell her there was a change of plans – but I couldn't. She had been so helpful with me in all of this. She was my sanity from the very beginning.

"So are you still doing a light dinner at Rapture tomorrow?" I asked shyly.

"Of course. It's tradition and you know I never break tradition." Spencer's eyes twinkled and I chuckled. "Call me if you're bored tomorrow. I have the day off."

"Consider it done." I smiled.

I had my hand on the door handle after tugging on my footwear. I considered _it_.

You know.

Dylan's request.

"Drive safe, it's slippery out there." Spencer whispered as she enveloped me in a hug.

"I will, I promise." I pulled back and licked my lips. She sighed softly when I cupped the side of her cheek, my thumb running smoothly over her skin. "Spence," I whispered her name and closed my eyes, not being able to fight the temptation.

I felt her gasp slightly at the gentle pressure my lips had against hers. Her hands tightened my jacket in her fists as I found myself pressed against her door, her lips finally relaxing against my own.

I moaned quietly, trying to quell the hard thumping in my chest.

I was kissing Spencer Carlin.

I was kissing Spencer Carlin.

I was fucking kissing Spencer Carlin.

"Oh God," Spencer ripped her lips away from mine, looking at me with an intensity I couldn't even begin to describe. Suddenly her head ducked back down and her hands were tangled in my hair, her lips back on mine again as her body pinned me harder against the door.

Lips caressed with such grace and tongues stayed in their respective mouths. It didn't deepen any further than her bottom lip being trapped between mine and vice versa.

Finally I pulled back with the lack of oxygen and felt her hot breath against my neck, placing tender kisses up towards my ear. "What took you so long?" She whispered.

_I was stupid._

But kissing her was definitely the _right_ thing to do.

**--**

_We're having my in-laws here this week so I won't be posting anything until next weekend, sorry guys! It's their first visit to Canada!_


	41. It Has To Mean Something

**Hey everyone! Sorry for this overdue update. After the in-laws left, I found myself in the hospital with low oxygen and pneumonia. I'm on the road to recovery now, I'm at home and taking it easy! I thought before I head to bed, I'd give you another update. So enjoy and thank you for all the awesome reviews! Keep em comin'!**

**37.1 - It Has To Mean Something**

**Spencer's PoV**

I couldn't sleep. I couldn't sleep a wink because my mind was on overdrive with the kiss I had shared with Ashley the night before. It was one of those kisses where you think it was real but then you think 'no kiss could be that great', you know?

It was real alright.

I could still taste her on my lips.

Cherry.

I had dropped the girls off at school a little over two hours prior and found myself bored out of my mind. I already did two loads of laundry, cleaned the bedrooms, vacuumed and mopped the floors.

I twiddled my thumbs and wondered if Ashley would indeed call me. I hoped she would.

After our kiss, she shyly slipped out the door and left quietly – but with a smile on her face. So that was a good sign.

I was about to try and find something on daytime television but I wasn't much for soap operas or Oprah. Hell my life had enough drama in it, never mind watching it all day, every day. The doorbell sounded and I immediately smiled at the thought of it being Ashley.

Oh how wrong I was.

"Hey." Aimee slipped passed me and shrugged off her coat.

"What are you doing here?" I asked, and not really in a nice tone either.

"I've missed you." She replied with a shrug.

"Aimee," I sighed and closed the door, "we need to talk."

"No." The blonde sat down and stared at me. "Talking would involve you making up excuses not to see me anymore."

"They're not excuses!" I said a little too loudly before taking a deep breath. "You know what we were when this first started," I said slowly, "we fucked – a lot; but that was it. Nothing more."

"Are you serious?" Aimee laughed incredulously and shook her head. "You can't possibly tell me that you haven't developed any feelings for me over the past four months."

"I haven't." I didn't miss a beat. Seriously, you can call me a bitch for being so cruel but at least I was being honest. There was no point in leading this woman on even further than I guess I already have.

"I can't believe you." Aimee hissed and stood up.

"Me?" I scoffed and frowned. "Are you serious right now Aim? Have I done anything to lead you to believe I wanted more than just a good lay every now and then?"

"You let me spend the night that one time." Aimee said in a serious, yet sad tone.

I knew that was going to bite me in the ass.

That was why I never allowed it to happen before but I fell asleep.

"Who is she?" The blonde sneered. "You went ahead and fell in love with someone else, didn't you?"

"No." I laughed. "I never fell out of love."

Aimee rolled her eyes and tugged her coat back on. "You are such a fucking bitch, Spencer."

"Glad to see you finally got the memo." I sighed tiredly. I had to be hard with the situation or she'd just keep trying.

As soon as she wrenched the door open, we found one shocked Ashley, jumping back. "Jesus," she muttered when I apologized for scaring her. "Am I interrupting something?" She asked hesitantly.

"Yea," Aimee spoke and stared at the brunette, "she just finished telling me that I was nothing more to her than a useless fuck on the days _she_ wanted it."

Ashley gasped slightly and looked at me. I stared down at my socked feet and bit my lip.

Now I felt ashamed.

"Oh." Ashley tilted her head and looked at Aimee. "I guess you just have to be a brunette in order to get the whole 'it has to mean something' stage." She smiled sweetly at the blonde.

"Whatever." Aimee sighed heavily. "You just wait, she'll screw you over too."

_Oh I hope so…_

Spencer! Cool it.

I glanced at Ashley, who just smirked. "Doubt that Blondie," she murmured, "I know how to please the lady and it keeps her begging me for more, right Spence?"

Whoa.

My eyes widened in shock and barely heard Aimee curse on her way out the door.

Ashley played that jealousy card perfectly.

"Her? Seriously?" Ashley raised an eyebrow as she came inside, taking off her shoes and coat.

"I uh, had itches that needed to be scratched." I shrugged and closed the door, making my way into the kitchen. I turned around to see if she was following me. "Not up to your standards?"

"Meh." Ashley shrugged and leaned against the counter, looking at me with her gorgeous brown eyes. "I think you could've done a hell of a lot better."

"Oh yea?" I smirked and put the kettle on the stove full of water. "Enlighten me."

"Well Katie was pretty hot so I have no complaints there." Ashley grinned but then she turned slightly serious. "However, no one out did me."

Oh hell no.

"Fuck no." I snorted and grabbed a couple of mugs from the cupboard. "Trust me."

I felt Ashley step closer and slid her arms around my waist.

So that kiss did mean something.

"I do trust you." She whispered in my ear and spun me around, pinning me against the counter. "I've never stopped."

I closed my eyes. I dreamed of having Ashley with me again for years. And there she was, right in front of me, her hands clutching at the belt loops of my jeans. I didn't want to look at her yet. I knew if I did, I wouldn't be able to steady myself. Everything was so intense at that moment. Her scent, her fingertips that were now tracing light patterns on my lower back, her breathing – oh God to hear her breathing made _me_ alive.

"No," I finally let out a shaky breath, "you stopped trusting yourself." I did it. I opened my eyes and found her brown eyes a few shades darker.

Ashley's eyes flickered from my own to my lips, while licking hers. "I'm working on that." She whispered as she moved in on me, her hands back to grasping my hips.

My arms were still at my sides, my fists clenching because I was fighting the urge to touch her. I wanted to so bad that it ached not too. "Ash," I blinked almost heavily and wrapped my arms around her neck.

Ashley kissed me. She didn't even skip a beat. Her lips fell upon mine in the most insecure kiss we've ever shared. However, with it being insecure, it was sweet and slow and light.

It was perfect.

**--**


	42. The Kiss That Never Ended

**_So here it is, the 'reunion' a lot of you have been looking forward too. Yes, this is rated NC17  and I do hope I did it some justice. Reviews are love. Enjoy!_**

**37.2 - The Kiss That Never Ended**

**Ashley's PoV**

Her kisses were so gentle at first. Her lips barely had pressure in them as they pressed against mine, her body not making an effort to push me away. I leaned into her and wound my fingers in her long golden locks.

I've missed her so much.

The soft moan that escaped her sounded like heaven. I soon found myself against the counter and her mouth assaulting mine even deeper. Her velvety tongue slid so slowly with mine for the first time in over a decade. I felt my knees buckle beneath me but luckily, Spencer being the strong woman that she was, held me up with her arms and body. I breathed her name and clutched at her hips, pulling her tighter against me.

The kiss never ended there. It felt like it was just getting started.

My coat fell to my feet and I felt a warm pair of hands slide under the bottom of my shirt, her short nails raking against my skin.

"Spencer," I broke the heavy kiss and took in her swollen lips and rosy cheeks. She blinked slowly and licked her bottom lip before tucking it in between her teeth, staring at me. "Are you okay?"

I had to ask her because knowing us, things were about to get heated up quickly.

Spencer only nodded her head, trapping my body tighter against hers and the counter, her lips moving against my neck. "Are you?" She whispered huskily and drew an earlobe into her mouth, her warm tongue flicking before teeth tugged.

"Oh yes." I whimpered and cupped her face, bringing her lips back to mine.

Words weren't really needed at that point.

What was about to happen was inevitable. It was bound to happen because despite the mistakes I had made in the past, Spencer and I were meant to be. We were meant to be more than everything we ever were.

Hands eagerly tugged at the bottom of my navy blue sweater. I moaned as I felt her mouth moving along my collarbone, her tongue dipping in all the right curves of my neck. I thread my fingers through her hair, holding her against me as she nips and licks little by little.

Pulling back, Spencer ripped her own shirt off and then immediately fused her mouth to mine again, both of us moaning at the contact of our bare stomachs touching for the first time in years as well.

"Not here." I barely whispered, not wanting to break away from any physical contact. I didn't want to stop kissing her.

I couldn't stop kissing her.

"Where?" She whispered back, her breathing a lot heavier than before. Her lips were nuzzling behind my ear as her fingers tickled up and down my back.

I didn't know where. I just knew that the very first time Spencer and I had decided to have sex, it was in the locker room of the community arena.

Good times.

But I wanted it to be more meaningful that time around. I wanted to have her.

All of her.

And not against an uncomfortable counter.

I felt my feet moving backwards and Spencer's lips back on my neck. I moved with her, trusting her to not let me fall. My foot hit a step and I fell backwards anyway. It didn't matter, Spencer was in my lap within seconds, kissing me again. My bra was the next thing to go, her lips finding my heaving chest.

"You're so fucking sexy." Her words rumbled thickly through her throat as she sat back and eyed my torso up hungrily.

"Spencer." I licked my lips and panted as she cupped my breasts, her dark bluish grey eyes staring back at me. "Not here."

Nodding, Spencer slowly stood up and led us up her winding staircase. Her lips were back on mine the second we reached the top of the landing. We moaned as the kiss grew deeper, anticipating what was really happening.

I was about to touch her in ways I had only dreamed of since high school.

I unclasped her bra while working her tongue with mine, feeling the ache between my legs intensify to a maximum when her fingers softly moved over my nipples, breathing heavily into my mouth.

I couldn't take it anymore. I needed Spencer.

I wanted Spencer.

I was going to have her right then and right ther-

"Not here." Spencer ripped herself away from me and continued our way down the hallway. Her hand was at my belt buckle, quickly ridding me of my jeans and then getting rid of hers just as we hit her bedroom door – literally.

Spencer stumbled backwards in her room, losing her footing and falling on her back on the white plush rug beneath her. I landed on top.

The shock wore off within seconds. I was about to get up and check to see if she was okay but she pulled me back down in a heavy kiss. I melted into her.

Finally, skin against skin.

The only material that separated us was her underwear.

I was about to take care of that.

"Bed." She breathed and I nuzzled her neck, my fingers trailing over her sides, making her jump.

"Here." I whispered and slid my fingertips under the waistband of her black boy shorts. I traced her hipbone that jutted out, defining the way she worked out every day and kept her body in shape.

Spencer didn't really have any complaints. Her hands came up around my neck, fusing her lips back to mine. We kissed heavily, hungrily, wantonly.

"Is this real?" Spencer fought to catch her breath, our hips moving slowly against each other.

I propped myself on my hands and looked down at her. She was so beautiful. Her hair was splayed out around the white soft rug. Her eyes were full of pure want and I loved the fact that I still knew that look. She wanted me just as much as I wanted her.

My lips pressed against hers again, my tongue tracing her lips gently before accepting the fact that when she parted them, she wanted me to deepen the kiss.

Who was I to deny that?

I could feel our bodies start to heat up; the perspiration that was being slightly gathered between us was setting our bodies on fire even more.

I shifted my body a little to the left and kissed her more passionately. I moved my fingertips down her throat, between her breasts and down her ribcage. "I've missed every single part of you, Spencer." I whispered, nearly crying at the intensity of it all.

"Aaash," she breathed hard, her stomach muscles tightening with every passing stroke my fingers played across her soft skin.

A part of me wondered if we were going too fast and the other part knew we were. However, every part of me didn't care.

No.

Spencer was beneath me, literally, looking at me with those eyes that had haunted me for years, those eyes that made me feel like home was right there with her. A warmth that made me want to be there with her.

For her.

I lowered my head and nuzzled her neck, breathing heavily against her. My body felt the tension the moment I stepped into her house. I would admit that my intentions for being at Spencer's were just to talk.

Her nails scratching lightly down my back made me realize that every intention I had was being tossed away for now. I needed her.

She needed me.

I brushed my lips over her perfect skin, nipping and licking every part slowly. Her moans were making my lower belly clench and the ache between my legs more acute. My fingers still played with the soft skin of her hips, making her moan even longer and louder. Her own fingers wound themselves in my hair the moment I lowered my lips to her beautiful breasts.

I could barely breathe.

It was all just so much.

So familiar.

My name was breathed from her lips when my tongue finally tasted her sweet sensitive skin. Her nipple was hard and silky all at once when it swelled in my mouth, my tongue flicking over the peak slowly. Her hands tugged slightly harder and I switched breasts, feeling my heart pounding hard against my chest and in my ears. My eyes were even blurred with the immense feeling overwhelming the both of us.

"Ashley." Spencer whimpered. Her legs parted a little when she felt my fingertips finally graze over the inside of her thighs. My mouth moved its way back up her neck, tasting her. I swiftly eased her out of the last piece of material that hid her from me, drinking in the stare she was giving me. Drinking in _what_ she was giving me…

…a chance.

Her.

Time.

It felt like time was standing still, giving us a chance to catch up. Spencer's hands grasped my shoulders when I found her lips with mine, swallowing her soft moans and pleas. I didn't waste anymore time. I wanted her to come, I wanted her to say my name like she used too. I wanted to worship her body and I tried. I really did. But her hips were moving unsuccessfully to relieve herself against my hand that had barely touched her – she needed it just as much as I did.

Her parted panting breaths against my lips were driving me insane. Her heaving chest was a vision I'd remember for a life time – and I had remembered for the past twelve years.

I pressed my forehead against hers and slid my fingers nervously closer to the rising heat that she was permitting. She gasped when my fingers finally probed deeper, sliding them between soft wet lips. I moaned louder than she did, I think, and kissed her with such passion. I felt a wave of pleasure and security run through me.

"Oh my…Ash…" she cried out softly when I slid my fingers up towards her clit, starting a gentle rubbing motion. "Fuck." She sighed heavily and tilted her head back, allowing me to explore her neck with feverish kisses.

My fingers teased her for a few minutes before I brought her eyes to look back at me. "I can't stop… oh God, if you want me to stop…" she moved her hand between us and guided my fingers to her entrance, "Spencer," I moaned and entered her easily.

"Oh God!" Spencer groaned through clenched teeth, her hips immediately setting the pace. I followed suit, thrusting into her gently but quickly. Her hands clasped around the back of my neck and she kissed me so fucking hard. It was sloppy because of her body reacting to the fingers that were buried deep inside her, but every kiss with Spencer was beyond perfect, sloppy or not.

My thumb bumped against her clit and she bucked, arching hard off the floor beneath us. Her nails dug deep into my back, the pain intensifying the arousal in my body. Kisses were barely being exchanged as I took over, moving my hands faster and harder, curling my fingers so that she'd clamp down on me and for a moment, I really never want her to let go.

"Fuck Ashley," Spencer moaned again and grabbed me by the hair, tugging me. There was no reason, she was just tugging and it felt so good. I could feel her stomach against my arm rapidly rippling and she was getting tighter, hotter, wetter… "Spencer," I whispered hoarsely, attaching my lips to her earlobe, "come for me, please?"

And she did.

Her whole body shook, her cries bouncing off the walls of her bedroom. Sweat had already formed on our bodies from the foreplay kisses since downstairs. I kissed her; she tasted sweet around her shoulder and neck, down her chest and back up.

I removed my fingers and we both breathed heavily into the silent air around us. Her arms wrapped tightly around my body, holding me close as she struggled to catch her breath.

"Oh wow." Spencer finally chuckled throatily. "Fuck wow." She ran her fingers through my hair and I took that moment to look at her. Her eyes were still a dark shade of blue and grey and her smile was more than mischievous.

I don't know why but I was expecting an awkward moment after all was said and done.

Spencer's brightened yet very rosy face was making that theory die. She brushed some of my curly hair behind my ear and was moving into a sitting up position. She was silent when she tugged at my hips, signalling me that she wanted to be straddled.

I moaned when slick skin slid against slick skin and inhaled sharply when she took one of my nipples into her mouth, her eyes never really leaving mine. I watched her pink tongue peek out and flick the excited bud so gently before she closed her eyes and moved to the other one. My hands found purchase in her hair and I tossed my head back, moaning louder as she sucked, bit and licked harder. "Oh for the love of…" the sentence died when she pulled back and stopped abruptly.

I had a secret. Not a big one but it was one I didn't think she'd ever discover because I didn't think I'd ever be in this position with her – pun could be intended.

Her fingertips tickled the area she was staring at. The tattoo on the lower left side of my abdomen. The number '22' with a maple leaf flag stuck out proudly with the colours of black and red, and the initials 'SC' embedded in the red flag in white in the finest printing you'll ever see on a tattoo.

"Ashley…" She breathed, her fingers still trailing over the tattoo. It was her number when she was on Team Canada.

I watched all of her games.

Whether it was going to one unnoticed or watching them on TV. I taped them too and Dylan often watched those recordings because she loved the sport just as much as Spencer did.

"When?" Her whisper was so soft and full of amazement.

"Your first year on the team." I murmured just as soft. "I never missed a game."

The confession was heavy but not in a bad way. It was just planted there and Spencer gaped at me, her thumb was now circling the ink artwork on my body. "Never?"

"Never." I barely whispered, suddenly feeling very vulnerable.

"Oh." Her blue eyes fluttered back down to the tattoo and then she looked back up at me. Leaning in, she brushed her lips over mine so gently I barely felt it. I barely felt her other hand palm my breast, squeezing it before trailing blazing fire patterns down my abdomen and cupping me between the legs just like that.

I gasped her name and she held my gaze, her fingers sliding in between my folds, her lips parting and moaning with me.

Then she was inside of me. So fucking deep but moving slowly. Her lips moved down my neck when I started to grind my hips against her fingers, allowing her to set the pace.

"Oh God." Spencer gasped as she explored me even deeper, leaning me back a bit, making me brace myself back on my hands to expose myself for her wondering eyes and questing mouth. I rolled my hips, struggling to breathe, gasping her name over and over.

Her lips were everywhere - my neck, my shoulders, my breasts, and my rib cage; all the while her fingers moving steady, never breaking their rhythm.

"You feel so good." She murmured with her frantic mouth. She was worshipping me and I was about to explode. Her fingers curled, her thumb pressed against my clit and I let out a low growl, bringing her face towards me so I could kiss her while I rode her hand even faster.

I felt it start from the tips of my toes, running through every ounce of my veins, streaming through my blood all the way up to my eyelids, where white sparks started to fly behind them. My body started to jerk against her uncontrollably, sweating and cursing delicately while my stomach tightened and I tightened around her fingers – coming so fucking hard. "Spencer." I breathed in a low keening moan, tossing my head back and riding out the rest of my orgasm slowly.

Spent, I collapsed in her arms, my face in the crook of her neck.

"You are so beautiful." I heard her murmur in my ear.

I nodded, trying to let her know what she was too. My lips were dry though and I couldn't get a word out yet.

I wanted to tell her I loved her. I loved her so much, with everything I was. Somehow though, the words wouldn't come out.

I told myself to just wait a little longer.

We had just made love on her bedroom floor. That was enough excitement and overwhelming feelings for the day.

Spencer's hands trailed up and down my back, breathing softly in my ear.

I just wanted to stay like that forever.

And never let go.

Spencer moved slightly, causing me to let go anyway. She quietly pulled my wobbly legs up off the floor and dragged me to her bed, laying back and allowing me to snuggle right next to her. "Did you want to come?"

I raised an eyebrow and lifted my head slightly from her shoulder and looked at her. "I believe I just did." I whispered hoarsely.

Spencer chuckled and licked her lips. "Well yes," a blush crept up her cheeks, "but I meant did you want to come with me to pick up the girls at school?"

"Oh." I laughed and nodded. "Are you sure?"

"Yes." She breathed and closed her eyes. "But now we rest."

"Rest." I nodded and went back to the shoulder I was resting on. I swallowed when I remembered exactly why I was there that afternoon. I bit my lip, not sure if I should bring it up. I cleared my throat. "Spence?"

"Mmm?" She replied, her fingers lacing with mine.

Really, why didn't that moment become awkward? It should've been awkward, right?

"I uh," I cleared my throat again and moved to rest on my elbow, staring down at her, "I have a question to ask you."

Spencer frowned in concern and ran her thumb over my lips before dropping her hand on her chest. "Is everything okay?"

"Yeah," I nodded and closed my eyes, my heart beating desperately, "I just, I need to figure some stuff out…" I felt her body stiffen and she rolled away, sitting up and quickly finding the pillow to cover her chest.

"Oh." She never looked at me and sighed. "I get it, we got lost in the moment and it probably was a mistak-"

"Mistake?" I sat up straight and crawled over to her at the end of the bed. "Spencer, this wasn't a mistake," I paused and blinked, looking at her, "do you think it was?"

"No!" Spencer answered quickly and swallowed hard. "No." She repeated again, so quietly.

"I'm sorry I made you think that," I gave her a shy smile, "sometimes my mouth still has a way of forming sentences wrongly."

She smiled back and chewed on her bottom lip. "What is it you wanted to ask me?"

I felt the seriousness come back again. "Could you look after Dylan for at least two more weeks?"

Spencer's eyes widened and she looked at me confused. "Tomorrow is Friday. Tomorrow you finally get to take her home and-"

"That's the problem," I breathed nervously as she watched me curiously, "I don't know where that is yet."

"Ash, what?" Spencer turned to face me fully. The pillow dropped from her grasp and it made me realize that we were having the conversation completely naked. Spencer noticed me checking her out and then looking at my own body, she got up off the bed and threw me an old jersey while tugging on one of her own. "What do you mean?" She whispered, crawling back on the bed.

"I want Dylan happy more than anything in this world," I stared at her, "you make her happy Spencer, you and Lucas."

"Ash…" Concern etched into her face.

"I can't leave now." I said finally after a moment of silence. "I want to stay here."

**--**

**Next time in Points Underneath:**

_"Woo, check out those sexy legs." A voice made me jump and I turned around holding my chest._

"Carmen!" I screeched and my face hardened. "What the fuck are you doing in here?"

"Uh duh? I came to visit?" Carmen shook her head and laughed, leaning back on a stool she was sitting on. "What's with the nice peep show?"

"How long were you here for?" I asked, ignoring her question.

"Relax, I just got here..." She looked around the place and raised an eyebrow. "Is Davies in your shower? I saw her car parked outside."


	43. Grown Ups & Little Girl Crushes

**38 - Grown-Ups & Little Girl Crushes**

**Spencer's PoV**

"Ashley…" I looked at her. She looked really good with her messy hair and in a baggy jersey that covered her gorgeous, yet very skinny, body.

I needed to put some meat on her bones.

"She loves you Spencer." Ashley smiled and shrugged. "I couldn't just rip her away from Lucas just like that. Not," she took a deep breath, "not after experiencing what it was like to be away from you."

I licked my lips and cleared my throat. "Is this what _you_ want?" I asked quietly.

"_I_ don't want to leave." Ashley confessed with a hint of a blush. "I know there's a lot I need to figure out. Job wise anyway and a place to stay."

I wanted to offer her to stay with me but I couldn't. Even if Ashley stayed in Kenora, she needed to be alone with Dylan before we made any arrangements to having them live with us.

Yes, sure, we had just done the dirty on the floor. Unexpected but very much welcomed. At the same time, there was still a lot to talk about.

Leave it to Ashley and me to allow our hormones take over.

What. You thought I was going to pass up a chance to tap that brunette beauty?

Please.

It was no mistake by any means.

Again, it was perfect.

"Do you not want me around?" Her voice filled with trepidation and fear.

"Are you insane?" I quickly answered her, not wanting her to think that at all. "Ashley, I've dreamed of this day… every day…"

"Me too." She whispered and looked at me. "I still have to quit my other job but I'm sure I can find something around here, right?"

"Christmas is just around the corner, everyone's hiring." I smiled softly and reached across to grab her hand softly. "Where are you going to stay?"

"Um," Ashley sighed and shrugged, "the hotel for now but I've seen a few places that are up for sale. I'm going to call places tomorrow and start checking them out." She looked so shy again. It was adorable.

"So you want me to keep Dylan in the meantime?" I asked carefully.

"I just figured it'd be less stressful on her. I'll probably go crazy until I can find something steady." Ashley's brown eyes flickered with sparks for a moment and she let out a soft smile, "but it's all worth it."

I grinned and brushed my lips over her knuckles softly, one by one. I felt like I was back in high school.

God.

It felt rather comforting.

"I'll take good care of her, I promise." I held out my pinky and she just chuckled.

"You've taken care of her for months now Spence, I know you will do a great job within the next two weeks."

We exchanged some more smiles before I glanced at the clock. **2:34pm**. "Well," I sighed softly, "I think we should go take a shower and get ready. I'm usually at the school by three."

"Together?" She smiled in that way that told me she wasn't asking an innocent question.

"Separate." I squeezed her hand and smirked. "Maybe some other time you can seduce me in the shower once again," I purred and she cracked a wider grin.

"Maybe."

"You go first," I offered and stood up, eyeing up the way the jersey sat perfectly high on her thighs.

"Are you sure?" She asked me with a cute smile.

"Go." I ushered her towards the door of the bathroom and pressed a quick kiss to the back of her neck. "Just save me some hot water."

"You know we could always conserve it if we just take one togeth-" I placed my hand over her mouth.

"Go." I whispered in her ear and kissed her cheek before pulling back and making my way downstairs.

You know, to give her privacy.

Or just to fight off temptation to join her.

I stumbled down the stairs and smiled when the shower turned on. I noticed the kettle was still sitting on the stove and I thanked the lesbian God that I didn't turn it on.

"Woo, check out those sexy legs." A voice made me jump and I turned around holding my chest.

"Carmen!" I screeched and my face hardened. "What the fuck are you doing in here?"

"Uh duh? I came to visit?" Carmen shook her head and laughed, leaning back on a stool she was sitting on. "What's with the nice peep show?"

"How long were you here for?" I asked, ignoring her question.

"Relax, I just got here..." She looked around the place and raised an eyebrow. "Is Davies in your shower? I saw her car parked outside."

"I told you that if I gave you a spare key, you could only use it during emergencies." I huffed and tried pulling my jersey down as far as I could.

I wasn't stupid, even though Carmen and I were the best of friends, she'd still jump me if I gave the green light.

So I was a little uncomfortable in my jersey with nothing underneath.

"Whoa." Carmen tossed her head back and laughed. "Please don't tell me that you and Ashley..."

"Fuck yes we did." I said rather seriously. "You need to go."

"I can't even stay to congratulate her?" Carmen pouted and I rolled my eyes. "You're such a spazz."

"Leave." I pointed towards the door and she just raised her eyebrow.

"You can't kick me out. I refuse to leave and unless you don't want anything to be seen, you'd be wise not to kick my ass." Carmen stood up and grinned.

"Please Carm?" I begged softly, seriously. "If Ashley finds you here she might get weird and I really don't want that."

"Is she jealous?" Her voice dropped suddenly.

"No, I just..." I rubbed my forehead and wished I had left at least one laundry basket full of clothes untouched so I could throw on _something_ to hide my almost bare-ass. "Things just happened out of the blue and I'm sure we're going to have to talk about it. In the meantime though, I'd like to keep the awkwardness to a minimum." I pouted. "If you really loved me you'd listen to me."

Carmen's face softened after that and she let out one of her most genuine sincere smiles that I absolutely loved. "Say no more," she whispered and got up quietly, "I'll see you tonight at the girls' game."

I grinned and nodded. "Thank you."

"Hey Spencer?" Carmen turned around while she tugged on her coat. "Congrats." She winked and made her way out.

Carmen really was the best friend I could ever ask for.

**--**

**Lucas' PoV**

I squinted as the heaviness of the snow fell down. My school bag was resting in a pile of snow next to the fence as I tried to look towards the streets. I couldn't see the black vehicle in all the mess of white falling down.

"Luc!" Dylan crashed into a snow pile and laughed. "Where's Spencer?"

"I don't know." I frowned and bit my lip. My mom was rarely late and if she was late, she'd always call the school so we'd know.

"Wanna build a snowman?" Dylan asked, unaffected by my mom's lateness.

I looked down at her. Her beanie cap was crooked and her curls were a mess but she was cute. I chuckled and nodded, pulling my winter coat sleeves over my mittens. I hated getting snow in my sleeves.

"Are we going to Rapture before our game?" She asked, rolling a small snowball in her hand.

"It's tradition." I smiled. "You know mom hates breaking tradition." I had gotten used to not saying 'my mom' when speaking to Dylan. She didn't seem to mind. Sometimes she'll say the same thing but then she'd blush and stutter an apology.

She hadn't done it front of my mom yet. I think she'd die of embarrassment or something.

Mom was in a surprisingly good mood this morning. She let us sleep in longer than usual and she was singing! I mean, singing to the radio while making breakfast. She never sang anymore and I didn't know why – she had a lovely voice. Just like Aunt Alex.

But she was singing. Loudly. A love song or something.

I wondered what had gotten her in such a good mood?

"Mommy!" Dylan screeched in a happy tone, breaking me out of my thoughts. I looked up and saw Ashley walking towards us with my mom. I watched her pick up Dylan and spin her around, kissing her on the cheek.

"Hey cutie," My mom smiled at me and picked up my school bag.

"Hey." I smiled back and wiped myself free from any snow and allowed her to wrap me up in a hug.

"Carlin!" I spun around and grinned as the cute blonde, Hadley, came up to us. "You forgot your sketch book on your desk." She blue eyes sparkled and I thanked her quietly. "Hi Miss Carlin," she smiled at my mom and looked back at me, "are you going to Jason's birthday Saturday?"

"Yes!" Dylan said, joining us.

"Cool," Hadley smiled and backed away, picking up the bag she had dropped while running towards me, "can't wait, see you two there!"

I blushed and looked at Ashley, who had a small smile on her face.

"Lukey's gotta a giiiirlfriend!" Dylan sang and I glared at her.

"Shut it." I muttered and walked ahead of the rest of them. I still couldn't see the black Chevy Blazer.

"You like Haaaaaaadley." She sang behind me and I swung around and glared at her.

"Dylan, be quiet." My cheeks were flushed with embarrassment.

"Come on Dyl," Ashley smiled and grabbed her daughter's hand, "no teasing."

"But she teases me about Jason all the time!" Dylan raised her voice in defence.

"You think he's cute." I shrugged and my mom gave me a warning looking.

Oh sweet, Ashley drove her mustang.

Wait...

Ashley drove her mustang and my mom was with her...

"Yea well you still like Hadley Maclay!" Dylan pouted.

"Uh huh." I nodded, not really paying attention, and looked up at the grown-ups. They looked amused and I noticed the smile the two exchanged – interesting.

"You two fight like sisters." Ashley said as we settled into her vehicle.

"Duh mommy," Dylan rolled her eyes and laughed, "that's because we are!"

I grinned and squeezed her hand in mine. "Yes, we are."

**--**

**Next time in Points Underneath:**

_"Ladies," Spencer smiled warmly and her eyes fell on mine, darkening yet shining brightly all at the same time, "sorry we're late, Lucas had an important phone call."_

Dylan chuckled.

"Is that who Jaiden was talking too?" Chase quirked an eyebrow. "She's been tying up the business phone talking to a gorgeous blonde?"

Lucas' cheeks flushed and she narrowed her eyes. Man she was such a Spencer.


	44. Ready, Set, Chase

**39.1 - Ready. Set. Chase.**

**Ashley's PoV**

"Eph," Chase sighed and slouched against the booth, "I just don't think we need to get Jai such an expensive gift for Christmas."

"Do you realize how cool we'd be?" Ephiny stared at her wife.

"We already are!" Chase laughed and looked at me. "Okay Ashley, let's say Dylan is a senior in high school and it's her year to graduate, with Christmas around the corner, wouldn't you rather get her a car after graduation and not Christmas?"

I blinked, trying to imagine my little girl a senior in high school. "Uh..."

"Well her eighteenth birthday is coming up..." Ephiny turned to look at me, "so you have three options."

"I got my first car on my sixteenth," I shrugged, "for Christmas I got loads of cash and on my graduation I broke up with my soulmate... so I'm not a good judge with this one."

Chase frowned. "Well that's depressing."

"I'd say leave it for graduation," I piped in a second later, "you already let her have the car whenever she wants it."

"See?" Chase raised her perfectly sculpted blonde eyebrow. "Even she agrees."

"Spencer!" Ephiny heard that laughter that could be heard miles away and I swung around to find her arm and arm with Carmen, the girls in front of them. I swallowed and stood up, fighting the urge to grab Spencer and kiss her.

We had agreed to keep things quiet until everything was figured out. We planned on telling the girls together about my decision to stay in Kenora.

"Ladies," Spencer smiled warmly and her eyes fell on mine, darkening yet shining brightly all at the same time, "sorry we're late, Lucas had an important phone call."

Dylan chuckled.

"Is that who Jaiden was talking too?" Chase quirked an eyebrow. "She's been tying up the business phone talking to a gorgeous blonde?"

Lucas' cheeks flushed and she narrowed her eyes. Man she was such a Spencer.

"Lucas! Dylly!" Jaiden came out from the back.

"Hey." Lucas grinned and took the offered hand as her and Dylan disappeared behind the back counter.

"She's going to be stuffing them full of cheesecake, isn't she?" Spencer eyed up the back suspiciously.

"I'm on it." Ephiny sighed and got up. "And I still think we should discuss this present thing!" She looked at her blonde wife.

"Nothing to discuss," Chase smirked, "I won. It waits until graduation."

"I love a woman who takes charge," Carmen spoke up for the first time and slid into the booth beside Chase.

"Hands where I can see them Carmen!" Ephiny yelled and we all laughed as she scowled.

"Why am I the only one _not_ getting laid?" Her grey eyes lingered on mine with a slight smirk.

"Don't look at me like that." I frowned.

"Congratulations." Carmen smirked even wider and ducked when Spencer's hand smacked the back of her head. "What the hell, Carlin?!"

Chase and I exchanged confused looks. "Okay, clearly I missed out on what we're celebrating."

"Nothing." Spencer said quickly and slid into the booth beside me. "Why isn't Chelsea here?"

"She's joining us at the game," I smiled and pushed a Dr. Pepper in front of her face, "thought you might need a pick me up."

"Pick me up?" Carmen snorted. "Didn't she already have one this afternoon?"

My eyes widened and I swung my head to look at Spencer. "How... what?"

"How, what what?" Chase frowned looking completely lost.

"Relax Ash," Carmen broke out with a charming smile, "I broke into the house and caught Spencer downstairs with barely nothing on while you were in the shower."

Chase choked on her drink and stared at us. "You two?"

Spencer licked her lips but I could tell she wanted to smile proudly. "No one knows."

"My lips are sealed," Chase hushed with a glint in her eyes. She looked happy – relieved. "Oh man, you two belong together, I'm so happy for you!"

"Yea, I totally just lost my chance with gorgeous here now." Carmen sighed but I could tell she was kidding.

"Mom?" Lucas came up to the table and grabbed Spencer's hand. "Can Dylan and I go to the movies tomorrow night with Jaiden?"

"Yea mommy, can I?" Dylan looked at me with her large brown eyes.

"We'll see." Spencer smiled and looked at me.

"We'll see." I repeated after her and the girls smiled, knowing the answer would probably be a yes.

**--**

_Sorry this update is so short! I'll have another short one up later on today, keep an eye out!! Thanks for reviewing and reading. Makes this all worth it._


	45. Ice Cream & Ch Ch Ch Changes

**39.2 - Ice Cream & Ch-Ch-Ch-Changes**

**Spencer's PoV**

"Davies!" I screamed after the referee blew his whistle. Dylan skated towards me and lifted her mask up, taking a sip of water. "You think you and Kelsey can tag team?"

"What about Luc?" She asked out of breath.

"They'll be expecting it." I offered and Dylan grinned, nodding mischievously.

"I'm on it Coach!" The tiny brunette saluted and skated back towards her position, getting ready for face-off.

I kept my eyes on the game until I felt a hand on my lower back. I turned around to find Ashley watching the game but had a brilliant smile on her face. I still couldn't believe what we had done earlier that afternoon. Shivers ran through my body just thinking about it.

"You're a hot Coach." Ashley whispered, being careful with her volume of tone. She glanced at me and winked before going back to watching the game.

I looked around me and when I noticed everyone's eyes were on the game, I leaned forward, "You're a hot MILF."

"Oh but you already have." Ashley faced me with a smirk and bit her lip. Damn, what a comeback! Left me speechless and I swallowed heavily, clearing my throat.

"Benton! Move!" I hollered, trying not to feel the eyes burning on me.

Score!

Dylan just scored a goal and Ashley actually caught that. She squeezed me into a hug and I laughed because it was cute.

"Holy wowsers!" Lucas screamed happily, scooping Dylan up and they both laughed as they fell to the ice.

The game was over and so was the fact that Ashley's hand on my lower back. She removed it and hugged Dylan after they shook hands. "I'm so proud if you!"

Yeah, we were tied with the other team and Dylan had just scored one for the win.

I was stoked.

"Thanks." Dylan giggled as her team mates patted her on the back and head.

"Dyl! You know what this means?" Lucas grinned. "Ice cream!"

"Ugh," Ashley smirked, "only kids want ice cream on a cold day." She looked at me and I raised an eyebrow. "Oh and you."

"Nice." I chuckled sarcastically but smiled to show I was kidding.

"So can we?" Lucas asked us, taking off her helmet.

"Actually," I looked towards Ashley and bit my lip, "how about we just go home tonight, okay?"

"But it's tradition!" Lucas frowned and stared at me with her grey eyes.

"I know sweetie but we have some ice cream at home and I promise you and Dylan can make your own sundaes." I patted her head and she looked at Dylan, who nodded vigorously.

They only got to make their own sundaes every few Saturdays so they knew to take the opportunity to do it, seeing as it was a school night.

"Are you going to have a sundae?" Dylan asked Ashley, her eyes wide and full of life.

"As long as you make it." Ashley grinned and kissed the smaller brunette's forehead. "Go get changed with Lucas."

Lucas and Dylan nodded as they walked to the locker room as fast as they could while on skates.

After waiting for our daughters to get changed, we made our way back to my place.

"I cannot believe it!" Lucas laughed as she flopped down on the couch, Dylan right beside her. "That was so awesome, you and Kelsey have to do that more often."

"I know right?" Dylan giggled as Ashley followed me into the kitchen, helping me get out bowls and the sprinkles for the girls' sundaes.

"So what exactly are we telling them?" I whispered, standing next to Ashley. I scanned her profile and she was still so damn breathtaking.

"That Dylan and I are staying," she glanced at me with a soft smile, "nothing more."

I nodded. The girls would be excited to know that Dylan wasn't going anywhere. I was pretty sure that when they found out about 'us' as a couple, they'd be even more happy, but Ashley and Dylan needed their alone time.

I wasn't going to allow myself or Lucas overshadow that.

No matter how greedy I wanted to be.

**--**

**Ashley's PoV**

I laughed as Lucas and Dylan wore matching sundae moustaches. "Good?"

"Very." Spencer grinned with her own face full of ice cream.

Always the ice cream whore.

I meant that as kindly as they come.

"You like it mommy?" Dylan smiled and I looked down at my bowl full of ice cream, filled with chocolate syrup and covered in different kinds of sprinkles.

"Very good." I smiled and ate another mouthful. I noticed Spencer smirking at me and I raised an eyebrow. "What?"

"You have ice cream on your nose." She shrugged and leaned forward, brushing the cold drop off my nose with the pad of her thumb.

I looked to find Lucas staring at us with amusement before digging back into her sundae.

We finished our desserts in silence after that and finally gathered around the living room, where Spencer and I took a seat on the floor while the girls curled up on the couch in their pyjamas.

I don't think either of us knew where to start. I took the initiative and moved to kneel in front of Dylan, tucking a curl behind her ear and placing a kiss on her soft cheek. "I'm proud of you," I whispered and she grinned, biting her own lip. "Tomorrow is a big day," I continued and she widened her brown eyes, I wasn't sure what crossed in them. Was it fear? Anticipation? Relief?

"Should I go?" Lucas scooted to leave but I stopped her with a smile and shook my head.

"You both need to hear this." I turned to look at Spencer, who just nodded and moved closer to us.

"I asked Spencer to take care of you for a couple more weeks," I looked at my daughter again and she frowned.

"Why?" She whispered. "Are you leaving me again?"

Oh God no.

"Never." I breathed and cupped her tiny face, resting my forehead against hers. "You've made a family here," I whispered, "and I'm not going to take you away from them." I pulled back and found Lucas' wide grey eyes staring at me as well. "You two know that I used to know Spencer, right?"

Both girls nodded.

"When we were Jaiden's age, we used to be girlfriends." I whispered and finally I felt Spencer come up beside me, her hand holding Lucas'.

"She was more than a friend?" Lucas frowned in confusion, looking at her mom.

"Yeah." Spencer nodded softly and Lucas went quiet, letting me continue.

"I want Spencer to take care of you baby, just until I find our own place and a job." I jumped back in surprise when Dylan knocked me over into a fierce hug. "I trust her enough to make sure you're happy until I get things settled in."

"Um," Lucas cleared her throat, "are you uh, is this a dirty trick?" She looked at me sceptically and then at Spencer.

"No babygirl," Spencer smiled, "Dylan will be with us until Ashley finds a place here."

"Seriously?" Lucas' eyes finally brightened up and she looked at Dylan and as if on cue, they screamed in happiness, jumping up and down on the couch.

"Well," Spencer whispered in my ear, "looks like they took it rather well."

"Of course," I smiled and quickly squeezed her hand in mine while the girls were preoccupied, "you as a mother, I'd be jumping up and down too."

"How about me as something else?" Spencer pulled back, her look softened a bit.

I didn't get a chance to answer her question as we were bombarded by a nine and eleven year old tackling us to the floor.

I smiled.

The next day was _the_ Friday; the day that Dylan would become mine once again.

The day I'd find us a place to stay.

The day I can look back at and say, "that was when it all changed."

**--**

**Next time in Points Underneath:**

_Carmen nodded slowly and tilted her head before taking a step forward and placing her lips by my ear. "Two words for you gorgeous," she smelled good, "jail bait."_

"Ugh." I pushed her back and shook my head. "Talk with you later, Carm."

Yea, if you thought my liking for Alex was huge…

…you definitely hadn't seen me when I was around Carmen Mandez.


	46. It's Her Time To Shine

_**So I know some of you are curious about Samantha Taylor and what goes on inside her head – and I know that some of you could care less. Well, since this part is already written, I'm sharing it anyway. You really don't realize the bigger part Sam has in this fic until later on – in any case, enjoy! And sorry it's a shorty. If I get home soon enough tonight, I'll post another update.**_

**40.1 - It's Her Time To Shine**

**Sammy's PoV**

Some people just don't get it. Maybe they don't want to understand it and that was okay by me, but it didn't make it right for them to keep making assumptions.

Finally, I was given a chance to voice my own opinions about the situation without being a wallflower or a back drop.

I watched her move around the café with amusement. She tried so hard to grab my attention but what she failed to know is that she already had it.

And that was all it would be, nothing more.

Jaiden noticed me and slid into the seat across from me. "Couldn't stay away from me, huh?"

"Never." I replied with a smirk and she blushed slightly. "Actually I was just wondering when you got your break?"

"Oh." Surprise spread across her face as she looked back at the clock. "Ten minutes?"

"I'll wait." I shrugged and she smiled, tripping over her feet as she took off towards the back.

Now, don't go getting all weird on me. I could appreciate a good looking woman when I saw one and Jaiden Wynters was definitely good looking. But like I said, she had my attention and that was all I was willing to give.

I just wanted a friend.

Seemed to me that Spencer and Ashley had been getting quite close as of late and Carmen had pulled away for some odd reason. Alex was nowhere to be found – except in your living room television where she rocked the arenas down one by one with live concerts.

Alexis Carlin.

Right, my whole speech was going to be about her to begin with. See, no one understood us and maybe they didn't because they didn't receive the full story.

Our relationship was more than just a high school fling – hell it was more than a college fling. It was real and it made me look at life differently. Not necessarily in a bad way, but in a way where I learned that not everything was perfect.

Including Alex.

She could've been though, but her flaws were just begging to be shown. I still loved her anyway.

I still forgave her.

Took me a while but we got there eventually.

I was in love with the woman. I always had been and the first time we broke up was hell for me because I figured that was what she wanted. Then she got involved with that girl Isa and I couldn't take it anymore.

So I laid my heart out on the line and hoped for the best. It was beautiful while it lasted.

But everyone just needed to believe me, believe us, when we said it was over.

There was no more future for us. Not after the way she tore my heart out over and over again. Maybe I wasn't the most innocent person in all of this. I could've handled situations properly. I could've been there to support her through the early stages of her career, but I didn't.

I had said my goodbyes because that was what was needed. One of us had to do it because we weren't happy anymore.

Simple as that.

Not everyone lives a 'happily ever after' life.

I stopped talking to Alex for at least two years before she stumbled upon my facebook. I hadn't seen her in two and half years before running into her at a video store. She was with Tracey still and what confused me was how much it warmed my heart to find her smiling once again with a gorgeous brunette attached to her arm.

We talked and soon found ourselves hanging out every once in a while. Tracey and I had become close as well. She had a love for travelling and we could talk about different cities and cultures for hours before Alex had to pry us apart.

Did I mention I was part of the wedding party?

Yes. One of Alex's 'groomsladies'.

Alex had beat herself up everyday over the fact that she knew about Spencer and Ashley's daughters. She told me but made me swear not to tell.

I wouldn't have anyway. Wasn't exactly my place.

I was friends with Spencer so it made it hard for me to bite my tongue when she told me about a little girl being brought into her home by the name of 'Dylan Avery.'. Again, it wasn't my place. I wasn't a sister nor was I a best friend, just a close one.

"Okay so…" Jaiden smiled down at me with her coat on, "I need to run to Safeway and grab the 'rents some fresh tomatoes, you wanna come for a walk?"

"Walk?" I chuckled.

"Sure, it's not that cold out!" Jaiden laughed and I rolled my eyes, grabbing my own coat. "This doesn't count as my break by the way, I just figured you'd want to tag along."

"Uh huh." I nodded with a smile. "Lead the way little one."

"Make one more joke like that again and you're not coming." She pouted as she swung the door open for me.

"Shouldn't it be you who gets the time outs?" I laughed as she chucked a snowball at me, missing me completely but hitting… "Carmen!"

"Hey." The dark haired beauty stuffed her hands in her pockets after brushing the snow off her coat. "Where you goin?"

"Tomato shopping." Jaiden smiled and grabbed my arm.

Carmen nodded slowly and tilted her head before taking a step forward and placing her lips by my ear. "Two words for you gorgeous," she smelled good, "jail bait."

"Ugh." I pushed her back and shook my head. "Talk with you later, Carm."

Yea, if you thought my liking for Alex was huge…

…you definitely hadn't seen me when I was around Carmen Mandez.

**--**

_**Sammy has grown in my heart and I want what's best for her. I want her to find happiness … question is will Carmen be the one to give that to her? Keep reading along the way and found out if Alex & Sammy are truly over.**_

**Next time in Points Underneath:**

"_Did you know that Lukey likes Jaiden?" Dylan giggled, climbing into the back of my mustang._

__

"I did," I nodded with a smile and started up the engine, "but how about we not bug her about it, kay?"

"Okay." I watched Dylan snap her seatbelt on and look out her window. "Did you know Spencer likes you?"

A slow smiled appeared on my face and I bit my lip. "I know."

"Do you like her?"

_"I do."_


	47. Just Say Yes

**40.2 - Just Say Yes**

**Ashley's PoV**

Chelsea smiled at Dylan as she gave her a hug. "It was very nice meeting you."

"You too." Dylan smiled shyly and held onto my hand tighter.

Chelsea stood up and brushed the snow off her knees before pulling me into a hug. "I knew you had it in you, Ash." She whispered and pulled back, her hands still on my face. "You're going to do a fine job."

I smiled and blushed. "You should come back and visit."

"I will, I'm sorry I'm going to miss Spencer and Luc but I need to get going if I want to catch my flight out to Calgary for a meeting."

"I'll tell them you said bye." I offered politely and she nodded, pulling me in for another hug.

The hearing went really well earlier that afternoon and it didn't take long at all. Dylan was handed back to me without too many questions because of all the hearings and trials I went through previously.

Spencer was at the court during the hearing and she gave me the brightest smile when I was granted custody of Dylan. She never hugged me until after we were out of the room, because it just seemed a little more professional.

Afterwards Spencer had to go back to work and I called the school to let the Principal know that I was keeping Dylan out for the rest of the afternoon. Chelsea, Dylan and I spent it at Tim Horton's before she had to catch a bus to Winnipeg's international airport.

"Thank you," Dylan said softly, her brown eyes blinking up at Chelsea, "for helping my mom."

Chelsea gave a heart warming smile to Dylan and she nodded. "She's the best friend anyone could ask for."

Dylan just beamed and held my hand tighter in hers.

"I will call you when I get to Calgary." The darker woman nodded and held her bag close to her while the bus pulled up.

We hugged one last time and she was on the bus, finding her seat.

I was going to miss her. She helped me a lot since I left the Centre in Thunder Bay.

"Mommy?" Dylan tugged on the sleeve of my jacket and smiled as the bus pulled away. "Can we go see Spencer now?"

I chuckled and scooped her up in a hug. She was a little small for her age, but she had muscles for a nine year old. I guessed playing hockey with Lucas helped her immensely. "Spencer will be home with Luc in a bit, they're just getting some groceries." I dug into my coat pocket and grabbed my car keys. "How about in the mean time, we go and bug Jaiden at work?"

"Did you know that Lukey likes Jaiden?" Dylan giggled, climbing into the back of my mustang.

"I did," I nodded with a smile and started up the engine, "but how about we not bug her about it, kay?"

"Okay." I watched Dylan snap her seatbelt on and look out her window. "Did you know Spencer likes you?"

A slow smiled appeared on my face and I bit my lip. "I know."

"Do you like her?"

"I do." I nodded slowly, making my way down the street towards the center of town.

"So because Luc is my sister, that makes Spencer my other mom, right?" I watched her brown eyes catch mine in the review mirror. I smiled and she sighed with relief. "I call her mom already, is that okay?"

I blinked at the blunt confession but somehow it didn't bother me. If it were any other woman other than Spencer, I may have felt hurt, but it made me dance a little inside.

"Well not to her face." She blushed with a slight giggle.

"Spencer's a wonderful person," I stopped at a red light and squeezed the wheel in my hand, "I'm sure she'd be tickled pink if she heard you call her that."

"Really?" Dylan smiled.

"Really." I nodded and hit the gas when the light turned green.

It wasn't long before we were pulled up into the front of 'Rapture'. Dylan hopped out quickly and slipped her small gloved hand into mine. "Can I have hot chocolate with whipped cream?"

"Of course baby," I smiled and she grinned, running to our regular booth.

"Well if it isn't the little rock star." Jaiden came out from behind the counter and helped Dylan out of her coat. "And the hot Momma."

"Hey Jai," I laughed and gave her a smile.

"Where's your other halves?" Jaiden peered around my shoulder and frowned when there were no two blondes following us.

"Shopping for food." My daughter shrugged and opened the dessert menu, hungrily eyeing up the cheesecake.

"Dyl," I leaned over the table, "how about we have dinner first, before we eye up the sweets."

She frowned and pouted. "But Spencer..."

"Dylan…" I warned lightly and she tilted her head, blushing a little.

"Sorry mom."

"You can have dessert after dinner, okay?" I patted her hand and she nodded, licking her lips.

"Am I taking the girls to the movies?" Jaiden asked me, wiping her hands on a towel, her blue eyes shining.

"Well," I slid into the booth and looked around the empty café, "I can't say anything for Lucas, but Dyl, if you want to go, you can."

"Yay!" Dylan clapped and beamed. "Spencer's gonna let Lukey come if I can go."

It was true.

The chimes on the door went off and a smaller blonde came running in and crushing Dylan in a hug. "I missed you at school!" Lucas cried and pouted.

"Hey." Spencer smiled at me and bit her lip, sliding next to me carrying a gentle look. "Fancy seeing you here."

"We got hungry." I patted my skinny stomach and she rolled her eyes, poking it.

"Ya, you need to eat more." Spencer chuckled and shrugged out of her coat, taking off her beanie cap. "But we bought food so we could eat in more."

"So…" I raised an eyebrow, "why are you here?"

"We saw your awesome car parked out front." Lucas jumped in, smiling a thousand watt smile that matched her mother's.

"Lucas insisted we stop." Spencer sighed with a smirk. "Did you two order yet?"

"Nope!" Dylan shook her head, her curls flying about. "But I sure am hungry."

"Me too." Lucas looked at Spencer, then at me.

"Hey Spencer," Jaiden cleared her throat and glanced at the older blonde, "Ashley said it's okay to take Dyl to the movies tonight, you mind if Luc joins us?"

Lucas' grey eyes grew wide as she looked at her mom. "Please?" She whispered adorably.

"Sure." Spencer grinned and nodded towards Jaiden. "Did you want me to pick them up afterwards or…"

"I'll bring them home," Jaiden wiped off the table for the third time and threw a wink towards Lucas.

Lucas and Dylan clapped happily and followed Jaiden towards the back, but not before Spencer yelled 'no cheesecake.'

"So," Spencer glanced at me and licked her lips, "are you free tonight?"

I ducked my head down and smiled. "I'm always free for you."

"Who said I was asking you out?" She smirked. Spencer was just so beautiful, even when she was trying to tease me.

I feigned hurt and looked away.

"Ash," she breathed with a slow smile and I caught her gaze, "I would love it if you joined me for the evening."

"I'd love too." I couldn't help but chuckle a little at the way she blushed.

"Good," she reached over and grabbed my hand, "I can't wait."

"Me neither."

I wonder what time Jaiden was taking the girls to the movie?

**--**

**Next time in Points Underneath:**

_"But then I met you," she looked at me, her voice softening a bit, "God Spencer, you were just perfect in every single way. The fact that you were flawed made me fall completely and hopelessly in love with you. I was so scared that I'd run."_

__

I swallowed and blinked a little bit. I chewed on my lip to keep myself from interrupting her.

"And I did," she sighed, "run that is."

_"Was it worth it?" I asked softly. _


	48. Right On Target

**_So I asked this question on my LJ but it's been smartly pointed out to me that not everyone reads it, haha! So I'll ask this question here and I'd love to have your input. It's not a promise but it's looking good once Points is finished - I was thinking of writing a third installment. It'll be Lucas/Dylan centric with a colourful splash of Spashley. So, are you interested in reading a short story starring the Carlin-Davies daughters?_**

**41 - Right On Target**

**Jaiden's PoV**

"So since you two already had dinner and dessert, I think we should skip the popcorn." I nodded thoughtfully, tapping my fingers against my lips as we stood in line for the newest Pixar cartoon. I was a fan of animated cartoons, less drama.

"Wha?" Lucas looked at me with a raised eyebrow. "You cannot go to a movie without having snacks, Jai!"

Wow, I swore I heard her growl somewhere in between that sentence. "You eat like a monster kid," I poked her sides and she rolled her eyes but smiled.

"I just want wine gums." Dylan shrugged. "Oh and a small Pepsi." She frowned. "Um, and maybe we can share popcorn?"

"Just wine gums?" Lucas snickered. "I want a small Dr. Pepper."

"I want a million dollars." I sighed and they both looked at me. "What? You can shit in one hand and wish in the other, see which one fills first."

"Ew." Dylan gagged. "Bad word!"

Crap.

"Fine, snacks are on me just don't go telling your parents that it's my fault if you have a stomach ache." We got up to the ticket booth. "Two children and one adult for the kid movie."

Both girls ran in front of me to stand in the concession line, waiting eagerly for their treats. I wish I could maintain an eating habit like them.

"Wynters," I turned around to find Sammy smiling at me, "I see you scored the two hottest dates in Kenora, very nicely done."

"Yea," I laughed nervously, swallowing, "what can I say? I'm a regular Romeo."

"I don't doubt that." She smiled and licked her lips. "So you let Ashley and Spencer have alone time?"

"Well, I like hanging out with the girls on a Friday night," I leaned a little, "they keep me out of trouble."

"I bet." Sammy chuckled and squeezed my shoulder. Ugh, my heart flipped and I hated when it did that.

"Did you want to maybe join us?" I asked in a hopeful tone. "We can share our popcorn..."

"Actually, I am going to see that new action flick." Sammy frowned, "but maybe we can catch another movie sometime?"

"Taylor, there you are!" I closed my eyes tightly as I heard her voice. "Hey cutie," she smiled at me.

"Hey Carmen." I nodded and swallowed hard again.

That was why I hated having crushes.

"Aunt Sammy, Aunt Carmen!" Lucas smiled as she tugged on my arm, telling me the line was moving up. "Are you going to see 'Just Another Day'?"

"No, I'm taking Sam to see 'Brutality Bites'." Carmen's hand slid around Sammy's waist and I fought the jealousy bug down.

"Wow, that's romantic." I rolled my eyes. That was right Wynters, let the sarcasm jealousy ooze… it was a turn on.

Right.

Sammy looked at me with a soft smile and moved towards me. "I think we need to have a movie night before I leave town in two weeks."

"Sure." I nodded.

"Come on Jaiden!" Dylan tugged on my other arm. "We're going to miss the previews!"

"You two be good to Jaiden," Carmen scolded lightly.

Lucas and Dylan nodded and pulled me forward to the counter. I looked back and noticed Carmen's hand was on Sammy's lower back as they entered their movie.

"You know what?" I looked at Lucas seriously. "You need to grow up quick so I can sweep you off your feet."

"Awww!" Dylan squealed and was smacked by the blonde. "Ouch! I'm telling Mom!"

**--**

**Spencer's PoV**

I dropped the keys on the table and threw my coat on the couch. "Coffee? Hot chocolate?" I asked Ashley as I made my way into the kitchen.

"I've had enough hot chocolate and coffee for one day." She groaned and sat on the stool at the breakfast bar. "Do you have any water?"

I smiled and reached into the fridge, grabbing her a cold water and myself a glass of iced tea. "It feels so weird not having the girls here on a Friday night."

"Yea?" Ashley tilted her head and licked her lips. "I thought Jaiden was your babysitter for Friday nights?"

"Oh well she was," I cleared my throat, "for the most part."

"Ah," she nodded slowly and took a sip of her drink, "most part meaning Aimee?"

I glanced at the hardwood floor briefly before meeting her gaze. "I guess."

"Did you ever like her?" She asked, her expression serious. "I mean, did you ever think you could be more with her?"

I stopped mid-step and shook my head. All the serious talk still had to happen sooner or later and just because we had mind blowing sex the previous day, didn't make it all go away. "Aimee was just a girl," I sighed and slid onto a stool across from her. My nail traced the design on my glass.

"Just a girl you messed around with." Ashley whispered.

"Yea," I nodded and met her gaze, "Ashley, I'm not going to sit here and sugar coat things. So if you have any questions you want to ask, go ahead but I'm not going to spare feelings." I didn't say that in a mean manner, I just wanted to let her know that I'm not going to hide anything. "And I don't expect you to either."

Ashley smiled softly and brushed some hair out of her eyes. "So with her being someone you just messed around with, did you see more in her?"

I wondered briefly why she was asking me that question and a part of told me it didn't matter. "Aimee was sweet," I shrugged my shoulders, "she had the potential but no one was good enough you know? After Katie, I kind of gave up searching for 'someone'. Lucas and I were good on our own and we were surrounded by family all the time."

"Yea but Aimee seems to want a relationship with you and Lucas, unlike Katie." Her brown eyes dared me to say differently.

"Maybe you're right." I raised an eyebrow and took a sip of my iced tea. "I guess the problem was me. Luc gets attached to people so easily Ash, and I wasn't ready for her to be attached to someone I was just... 'seeing'."

"Sounds like you weren't ready to get attached either." She eyed me up while picking at the label of her 'Fiji' water bottle. "You just liked the itched to be scratched, right?"

"I'm not perfect," I sighed. "I couldn't stand who you were before you met me but I understood it was your past," I met her saddened brown eyes, "granted it was high school, sharing your body with other people is a serious thing and at first I was afraid I'd be a 'thing' to you when we first started dating. But I get it now."

"Get what?" She frowned slightly.

"I get why you weren't faithful. I get why you ran away from the relationships you built and proceeded to be the type to fool around rather than settle." I took another sip of my drink and leaned forward a bit, tracing the grained pattern of the countertop with my eyes before slowly bringing them to her face. "It was easier. It was so easy to fall into that role because a part of me didn't have to care. I didn't have to care about another broken heart or a wounded promise. I could just… leave. I had ways out and I liked that."

"Wow," she breathed and let a long passing of air release from her lips, "so this is what the other side of Spencer is like?"

I shrugged. "I'm still me."

"You know," her voice quivered a bit, "before you I just liked the sex. That and I hated the thought of being tied down to one person."

"Like Beth." I pointed out.

"Riiight," she nodded slowly and blew some hair out of her eyes, "she was amazing but she just…"

"Didn't put out." I pointed out again.

"Huh, are you going to let me talk?" Ashley quirked an eyebrow and I smiled a little, putting my hands up in surrender. "I just felt like I could do whatever I wanted or uh, you know, whoever I wanted…"

I sat there silently, listening to her as she finally, _finally_ let me in on the person she was before me; Dirty Davies. It took her twelve years and heartache but she was doing it.

"…I guess I didn't care about how the others would feel just as long as we were having fun."

Exactly.

"But then I met you," she looked at me, her voice softening a bit, "God Spencer, you were just perfect in every single way. The fact that you were flawed made me fall completely and hopelessly in love with you. I was so scared that I'd run."

I swallowed and blinked a little bit. I chewed on my lip to keep myself from interrupting her.

"And I did," she sighed, "run that is."

"Was it worth it?" I asked softly. I wasn't angry. I was hurt still more than anything, but I wasn't angry with her.

"The only part that was worth it is my daughter," Ashley whispered. "Dylan is my greatest gift." Her head tilted a bit and she blinked back a few tears. "Aside from the love that you had possessed for me in high school."

I couldn't help but smile a little but also feel a little bit of sadness. "So," I licked my lips and moved around the counter to slide into the stool beside her, "say you didn't run, do you think we'd be here with two daughters running around and be in a strong marriage?"

Ashley smiled and her eyes sparkled. "Yes, with a dog as well."

"A dog?" I raised an eyebrow and picked up her hand, just casually inspecting it. "What kind?"

"I don't know," she shrugged with cuteness, her brow furrowing in thought, "maybe a brown lab?"

I had stored that away for future reference.

"Lucas wants a brown lab." I grinned. She did and she had been hounding me to get a dog for the past five years.

"Well, at least she'll be on my side." Ashley chuckled and laced her fingers with mine. "Spencer?"

"Hmm?" I watched as her thumb made patterns on the back of my hand.

"About yesterday afternoon…"

"You were perfect." I smirked and she rolled her eyes and laughed huskily.

"I just," she cleared her throat, "I wanted to let you know that I really can't get that out of my head."

"Me neither." I whispered in a serious tone. "Just the thought of the thought of it…" I suppressed a moan at the vision of her legs wrapped around my waist, chest heaving and mouth panting against mine.

"I know." Her darkened eyes zeroed in on my lips.

My lips zeroed in on hers.

I was guessing that talking more was out of the question.

**--**

**Next time in Points Underneath:**

_Lucas stretched out on her back in my twin bed and propped both her hands behind her head. "I wanted to say sorry."_

__

"For?" I whispered, sitting up to look at her.

"For not giving your mom a chance." Lucas rubbed her eyes and blinked at me. "Forgive me?"

_I smiled and squealed, moving to jump on her in a hug as we both fell into a fit of giggles. "You're forgiven."_


	49. Girls & Their Hockey

**_So thank you ALL who have given their opinion on the third installment! I have the whole story worked out in my head and little bits and pieces of clues have been placed everywhere in this fic to make it lead up to that... just in case I was still feeling this fic after everything was said and done. Anyway, with your kind words it only encourages me more to finish Points and start the third part. Thank you! _**

**_As for Alex not being around in a while, she'll come back full force. Her story isn't over yet. Not saying it'll be an easy ride, in fact it'll be quite bumpy but she's Alex - I can't make her suffer for TOO long... Can I?_**

**_I don't own SoN! Just my originals. Rated R._**

**42.1 - Girls & Their Hockey**

**Ashley's PoV**

I couldn't believe I was topless and she wasn't. Her hands were like fire on my back as her mouth slid against mine in the most delicious way. "Spence," I gasped as she flipped me on my back, settling me down on the couch, her hand gripping my hip slightly.

I shivered when she wrapped my leg over her hip, feeling her rock against me as her mouth slid down my neck.

We should be talking. We should be laying _everything_ out on the table. Questions should be asked and maybe a little bit of yelling here or there – but there wasn't any of that.

"Fuck Ash, you feel so good," her harsh breathing washed over my ear, causing me to moan loudly.

We had been pretty much making out for the longest time before I felt her hand go under my shirt, cupping my breast over my soft cotton bra.

I was so wet and needing her to just do whatever she pleased, as long as it was making me come against her.

I felt her mouth move lower and growled, tugging at her hair when I felt her tongue circle over my right nipple teasingly.

Only she could make me feel anything like that. The other women I was with after Spencer, I had no recollection of them. Their faces were always so blurry because I was always so out of it. I couldn't remember their touches. At all.

Spencer's touch however, left a permanent impression on my mind the whole time we were apart.

I arched my back when I felt her slender fingers slide into the waistband of my jeans. Just as she was about to pop the button, she pushed off me in a hurry, her blue eyes wide. I frowned in confusion and was about to say something when we heard the sharp laughter of girls coming up the outside porch.

"Shit," I cussed quietly and moved fast to grab my shirt, tugging it on fast. I had no time to but my bra back on, so Spencer stuffed it between the couch cushions and handed me her coach jacket to put on to hide my chest.

Spencer swallowed hard, flipping back her long hair as she turned on the TV and it was no surprise that a hockey game happened to be the first thing she changed it too. Her face was so flushed and her lips so swollen from all the kissing. I blinked heavily, wanting nothing more than to reach over and grab her, kiss her, beg her…

"Mom!" Dylan opened the door and kicked off her boots and coat, before making a running jump to sit in my lap. "You're still here!"

"I am." I whispered and caught Spencer's half smile through the reflection of the TV.

"Can we watch a movie?" Lucas was behind Dylan, and sat on the couch between her mother and me.

"Didn't you just watch one?" Jaiden stood at the front door, smiling as she closed it.

"Yes but it's Friday Night Frightmare!" Lucas pouted and I heard Spencer chuckle.

"Baby," the blonde ran her fingers through the wavy blonde hair of her daughter, "I don't think watching a scary movie is that great of an idea."

"Sure it is, Jaiden can spend the night and keep me company." Lucas grinned.

"Ah," Jaiden shook her head, "sorry kid but I have a practice in the morning and I don't think Coach would forgive me if I missed it." Her eyes gleamed at Spencer's as she smiled.

"And you're right," Spencer admonished jokingly, getting up from her side of the couch, "so since I have to be up early in the morning, you two need to be in bed within the next thirty minutes so you're not cranky when Ryn comes and gets you."

"Awww." Dylan pouted and crossed her arms against her chest. "Why can't we come with you, Spencer?"

"Yea." Lucas pouted.

"Because it'll be early and the last time you two fell asleep in the penalty box." Spencer teased, causing both girls to giggle and blush.

"Well, it was nice sharing the evening with you two ladies," Jaiden bowed and looked at me, "hope you enjoyed your night as well." She threw a wink and leaned over the couch to kiss the girls on the cheek and kissing Spencer on the forehead. "Night gorgeous people."

"Night Jai and thank you!" Spencer smiled and got up to close the door behind the teenager. She looked at the three of us sitting on the couch. "You two should get ready for bed."

"But mom!" Lucas sighed but got up anyway and held out her hand for Dylan to take. "Are you still going to be here when we're done getting ready for bed?" Her eyes held mine and she licked her lips.

"Of course," I replied softly and she grinned, dragging Dylan up the stairs behind her, the two of them giggling the whole way.

Spencer watched and listened as she heard them get to their own rooms before she sat right next to me, cupped my face and kissed me hard.

"Fuck," I muttered when she pulled back, her eyes just as dark as my own. "Damnit, you can't do that and then just stop."

"Here's your bra," she grinned, ignoring my comment, while handing me the white material.

"Thanks." I pouted and she grinned, kissing me softer that time. She pulled back in time to hear the girls come down the stairs. I stuffed it in the pocket of the jacket I was wearing and grinned as Dylan made herself comfortable on my lap once again; her hair smelled like coconuts from her previous bath.

There was a peaceful atmosphere that filled the air as the hockey game played in the background. I looked over to see the two Carlin ladies eyes glued to the screen and then found Dylan's on it too.

I chuckled to myself and wrapped my arms tighter around the small waist of my daughter.

My girls and their hockey.

I loved it how some things would never changed.

**--  
Dylan's PoV**

"Dyl?" I heard her whisper in the darkness of my bedroom.

"Mm?" I yawned.

"Do you think your mom likes my mom?" I felt her move on the bed and turned over, facing her. "I mean, do you think they _like_ each other?"

I stifled another yawn and smiled sleepily. "They did say they were girlfriends at Jai's age."

Lucas stretched out on her back in my twin bed and propped both her hands behind her head. "I wanted to say sorry."

"For?" I whispered, sitting up to look at her.

"For not giving your mom a chance." Lucas rubbed her eyes and blinked at me. "Forgive me?"

I smiled and squealed, moving to jump on her in a hug as we both fell into a fit of giggles. "You're forgiven."

"So are you excited about Jason's birthday party tomorrow?" She asked in a whisper as we heard Spencer's bedroom door being shut quietly.

"Yea," I blushed slightly. He was the cutest blonde in my class. His eyes were the greenest colour ever.

"Me too." Luc smiled and ran her hand through my hair. "Do you think Hadley really likes me?"

Hadley did. She always asked me about Lucas and I was only nine, but I wasn't stupid. She would always ask me if she thought Lucas would mind if she played with us at recess, or if she would like what colour of shirt she was wearing. That wasn't normal, right?

"She likes you." I giggled quietly.

"Shut up and go to sleep." Luc shrugged and blushed before pulling the covers up to our chins. It was snowing hard outside and I hoped my mom made it back to her hotel safely.

"Hadley liiiikes you." I kissed her cheek quickly before turning my back towards her and closing my eyes.

"Night sis." I heard her whisper and I grinned.

"Night sis."

**--**

**Next time in Points Underneath:**

_"Should I be jealous?" I heard that husky voice and turned around to find Ashley standing there shyly with two cups of coffee._

I smiled widely and chuckled. "Only if you wanted to be Captain of Rapture Ravens."

Ashley grinned with her crinkled nose and handed me a fresh Tim Hortons coffee. "Breakfast of Champions, I figured you could use one seeing as you're still getting your ass up before sunset after all these years."

"Thank you," I offered politely and took a sip. Exactly how I liked it. 


	50. Morning Coffee

**Flashbacks are in **_italics. _**This flashback was taken from **Wash It All Away – _**Chapter 2.1: Surprise Coffee****.**_

**42.2 - Morning Coffee**

**Spencer's PoV**

_Practice was over two hours later and I was feeling more wide awake. I knew that a nice hot shower would relieve me of my stiff muscles. I didn't stretch as much as usual and it was showing, or rather, I was feeling it. I got off the ice and started to walk towards the locker room when I felt a tap on my shoulder. I looked up and there she was. Wide awake with two coffees sitting beside her. She was leaning over the rail with a smile that melted me once again. "Ashley!" I grinned and took off my helmet, my blonde hair sticking to the back of my neck. All of a sudden I felt self-conscious and bit my lip. "What are you doing up? It's barely sunrise!"_

__

Ashley snickered and made her way down to me. I was taller than her even more now that I had my skates on. "I figured you could use a little caffeine seeing as you actually drag your ass here this early in the morning." She grinned and tipped the coffee tray towards me. Even though I had to go change, I managed to take my gloves off and take a sip of the hot liquid which warmed my insides as her smile did as well.

"Technically I've been up since 4:30am so I've been up for almost three hours now." I carefully placed the cup back in the tray and adjusted my helmet under my arm. She stood there quiet for a moment and then bit her lip in a smile.

"You're even crazier than I thought you were, Carlin." Ashley looked over my jersey and smirked. "You look really good in your gear."

"I feel like an oversized marshmallow!" I protested with a laugh. I nervously switched from foot to foot, she was definitely checking me out and I had no idea how to handle it. Hell, her next comment didn't help any.

"Lucky for you, I find marshmallows very good," she winked and snickered.

"Uh," I cleared my throat and realized she enjoyed making me squirm, "but they are so very sticky."

She just shrugged and never let her smile fade. "You should go get changed before you end up in the locker room alone . . ."

Was she. . .? Did she just . . .? Okay, I figured I'd better go get changed before this woman literally stopped me from breathing. At this rate, I wouldn't put it past her to come and see me in the locker room. Worse yet, I didn't see myself stopping her.

"Yea, um, you gonna be here?" I asked, sounding a little eager.

"I'm only here for you gorgeous," she winked and playfully swatted my overstuffed ass, "now go before the rest of your coffee gets cold or I drink it all."

I swallowed hard and laughed. Yes, she was really flirting with me. She was really really flirting. Ashley Davies, the cousin of my boyfriend, was flirting with me.

_And I loved it._

//

I had managed to actually look decent for once in the early mornings. Maybe because I made an effort as well… not something I usually do at five thirty on a Saturday morning. Really, all I do is Coach a bunch of seventeen year olds so I had nothing to look forward too.

"Ouuu," I heard a purr in my ear and turned to face Jaiden, "looking _hot_ Coach Carlin."

I smirked and looked down at my tight jeans and nice fitting sweater. "Thanks Jai."

She nodded and licked her lips while scoping out the arena. "Where are the girls?"

"Concession. They successfully talked me out of getting Ryn to take them this morning." I chuckled and she joined in, calling me a 'push over'. "So," I stepped aside and grabbed her arm, dragging her into the team box before the rest of the team came out, "I was watching your game the other night," she blushed and I patted her shoulder softly, "I was wondering if you'd be interested in this…"

"Oh my Gosh!" Jaiden squealed at the white 'C' badge in my hand. "Are you serious?"

"Am I gay?" I raised an eyebrow and she smirked. "Yes, I'm serious. You're a strong leader and you've brought this team so far and it's only the beginning of the season."

"Spencer!" Jaiden squealed and hugged me, making it awkward with her gear on. "This means so much, thank you. I'll honour the responsibilities I promise."

"I know," I smiled softly and patted her cheek, "trust me, I know."

Jaiden looked at the badge in awe once more before placing it back in my hand. "I'll get one of my moms to sew it on but can you hang onto it for me until afterwards?"

I nodded and she squealed again, kissing my cheek before taking off on the ice.

"Should I be jealous?" I heard that husky voice and turned around to find Ashley standing there shyly with two cups of coffee.

I smiled widely and chuckled. "Only if you wanted to be Captain of Rapture Ravens."

Ashley grinned with her crinkled nose and handed me a fresh Tim Hortons coffee. "Breakfast of Champions, I figured you could use one seeing as you're still getting your ass up before sunset after all these years."

"Thank you," I offered politely and took a sip. Exactly how I liked it. "And what are you doing up at this hour?"

She shrugged with a smile and turned her head in the direction of our daughters. "I can't believe they are morning people."

"Yea," I laughed softly, "they just wanted to see the girls practice. Some Saturday mornings when I'm not coaching the team, they refuse to get up before ten."

Ashley laughed with me and chewed on her bottom lip briefly. "Oh," she blushed and set down her coffee before tugging off the jacket I had given her to wear the night before, "this belongs to you."

I grabbed the black jacket and briefly glanced over the 'Coach Carlin' sewn onto the left side of it. "You look better in it."

I was disappointed to find the bra that was stuffed in there was no longer in the pocket.

Damn.

"Yea, no." She shook her head. "You looked really hot in your hockey gear, but I've gotta say that this Coach thing really is a turn on."

"Mmm," I smirked and resisted the urge to kiss her, "good to know."

"When is Dyl and Luc's next game?" Ashley asked me as she watched the rest of the team pile onto the ice.

"Sunday afternoon." I smiled and opened my folder, handing her a coloured chart. "Their team is highlighted in blue, the little check marks beside them means a game and the 'p' means practice. Oh," I grabbed a pen and quickly scribbled in a 'K' beside a few games and practices, "everything with a 'K' is at the arena in Keewatin. Not a lot of them are taken place there but with the boy teams starting soon, we'll be fighting over both rinks."

Ashley nodded and smiled, studying the chart. "Wow," she breathed and looked at me, "I can't believe I'm actually a hockey mom."

I chuckled and nodded, blowing on my whistle to get the girls to huddle in. "It never gets boring."

"Mom!" Lucas came running down the steps with her face full of chocolate. "Dylan bribed me."

Dylan gasped and scowled. "I did not! I said I dared her to eat chocolate and she didn't say no."

Ashley had an amused look on her face.

"Luc, you know it's too early in the morning for chocolate unless it's a hot drink." I sighed and leaned forward to wipe some chocolate off the bottom of her lip.

"But you know I like dares." She pouted.

"Yea," Dylan shrugged, "and she dared me to dare her."

"Dyl!" Luc turned to face her. "You're such a tattler!"

"Lucas," I placed a hand on her shoulder and she looked at me, "please go wash up and come back here. I don't need you girls running around and getting into trouble while I'm busy with the team."

"Fine." Lucas mumbled. "Sorry I ate chocolate and I'm sorry I yelled at you Dyl."

I exchanged smiles with Ashley and she ran her fingers through Dylan's hair.

"It's okay," Dylan whispered and grabbed Lucas' arm, "did you want me to come with you?"

Lucas nodded and they took off towards the locker rooms.

I smiled and leaned into Ashley briefly. "Get used to it if you're sticking around." I whispered and clapped my hands as I made my way towards the center of the rink.

I looked back to find her watching me with a soft look.

A look that I was absolutely in love with.

It was just too early to tell her that still.

**--**

**Next time in Points Underneath:**

_"What's up?" Tracey asked with concern as she walked out onto the stage and grabbed the mic away from me. "You're not on your game tonight."_

"I know," I groaned, "I just haven't been feeling it."

"Babe," she sighed and placed a caring hand on my back, "we don't have to go anywhere you don't want too."

"Anywhere meaning Kenora, right?" 


	51. All In A Day, Part One

**43.1 - All In A Day – **_**Part One**_

**Alex's PoV**

It was my last concert for the next two months. I was heading home soon and a part of me was glad that music was being put on hold.

I should have been the one to make contact with everyone, since I was the one who had things to be sorry for.

I sighed in frustration as I missed the one note I perfected so long ago. The rehearsal I was in sucked big time.

"What's up?" Tracey asked with concern as she walked out onto the stage and grabbed the mic away from me. "You're not on your game tonight."

"I know," I groaned, "I just haven't been feeling it."

"Babe," she sighed and placed a caring hand on my back, "we don't have to go anywhere you don't want too."

"Anywhere meaning Kenora, right?" I looked at her and shook my head. "I know they're all just going to shun me."

"Maybe." She shrugged and followed me slowly as I paced. "Your parents want you back home, maybe you can go see them first?"

"My mom will just grill me about why Spencer and I haven't been talking. I'm sure she talks to Spence all the time."

"Oh stop it," Trace stopped and made me turn around to look at her, "you're throwing this self-pity party and I'm not buying into it. You kept things from your sister and your best friend, maybe for all the wrong reasons that you felt were right at the time, but don't go making that an excuse."

I stared at her and frowned, tugging my arm away slightly. "I am not throwing a self-pity party."

"Yea, you are." Tracey shook her head and never made the attempt to pull me close again. "Alex, everyone has had a say in this whole secret. Spencer could've found a way to tell Ashley and Ashley could've found a way to tell Spencer. You can't keep putting this all on your shoulders like it's all your fault."

I remained there, just staring.

"I'm going to go and let you get this rehearsal done," she whispered softly, her fingers pulling me close by my belt loops, "please don't be mad at me," her lips fell to the corner of my mouth, "please?"

I smiled a little and wrapped my arms around her strong hips. "I'm not," I said quietly, "I'm just irritated with myself."

Tracey nodded and kissed me directly on the lips that time. "I understand."

"Please don't go?" I asked as I pulled out of the kiss. "I'll nail it this time."

She grinned and nodded, passing me the mic back. "Hurry up cause I'm hungry."

I shook my head and gave myself another shot at the note I never once missed.

**--**

**Spencer's PoV**

"Not there," I moaned softly and exhaled slowly as fingers pressed harder into my back, "oh God, right there."

She chuckled and pushed deeper, adjusting herself on top of me. "Damn, you are tense."

"I know." I groaned and allowed my head to fall into the pillow below me as she shifted once again.

"Breathe out," she whispered and I did, knowing exactly what she was doing. Then I felt the popping go all the way up my spine as she applied more pressure, "babe, you really need to see a chiropractor."

I pouted and rolled to my side, looking up at Carmen. "I don't want too."

"You need too." She laughed and stood up, handing me a glass of water.

"But they hurt me."

"That's because you're always so tense. You should be used to the pain." Her grey eyes danced with mischief.

I scowled and grabbed the pillow from off the floor and threw it on the couch. "Why are you here anyway?"

"Is that the thanks I get for giving you a chance to have these," she waved her fingers in the air, "on you?"

I snorted and pushed her out of my way slightly. "In your dreams."

"We've been over this already, always in my dreams." Carmen pouted and sat on the couch, her feet propped up on the coffee table. "Your brats are gone, you were here alone… why the hell isn't Ashley around?"

I grinned. "She will be coming for dinner tonight."

"Oh, but the girls are _gone_ and you're here _alone_…" Carmen raised an eyebrow. "Where is Ashley?"

"Where's Sammy?" I smirked when she shut her mouth quickly. "Lucas told me that she saw you with her at the movies last night."

"So?" She shifted and stared at the TV, which was turned off.

"Nothing." I shrugged.

"She's with Jaiden." Carmen sighed. "Early afternoon movie."

"Ah," I nodded, "you do know that Sammy doesn't feel anything for Jaiden, right? You're getting upset over nothing."

"I'm not upset!" Carmen glared at me. "I mean, I'm not upset."

"Clearly." I drew out the word with a slow nod. "You really like her."

"So?" She mumbled and played with the couch material. "What's not to like?"

I grinned and sat down next to her. "You should bring her over for dinner tonight."

"Really?" Carmen's eyes lit up instantly.

"Yea, Ashley is helping me make the food and Ryn's coming over with her new boyfriend. You know how much I love cooking anyway, I don't mind making an extra plate."

"Are you sure?"

"Carm," I laughed, "you're my best friend and so is Sammy, both of you are welcome here whenever."

"No teenagers allowed?" She pouted. I could not believe she was so jealous over something that would never happen.

"None." I crossed my heart.

"Sweet!" Carmen cheered and stood up, looking out the window. "So, it's a nice day out, no kids around…" she bit her lip and walked closer to me. "We should stretch and strain our muscles while we groan and moan…"

I stood up and smiled coyly, tugging on the collar of her shirt, bringing her ear to my lips. "Last one to the ice has to shovel," I whispered and pushed her back before running to grab my hockey gear.

"Bitch!" Carmen hissed and scurried to get her own gear together as well.

**--**

**Next time in Points Underneath:**

_"I still have to wonder why she isn't here." I heard Carmen chuckle. "You two have the perfect opportunity to have the house to yourselves for some hot lesbian sex."_

__

"If you thought she was here, why'd you drop by?" Spencer asked.

"Maybe I wanted some action too- ouch!" I watched quietly as Spencer shoved her back in the snow.

_"I will not be sharing Ashley, thank you." Spencer knelt down beside the other woman. "Eat snow, bitch." She laughed and shoved snow down Carmen's jersey, earning a yelp._


	52. All In A Day, Part Two

**_Sorry the chapters are short, I cut them up on purpose so I don't lose the flow of each titled chapter!_**

**43.2 - All In A Day – **_**Part Two**_

**Lucas' PoV**

I watched the other kids play games that Jason's parents had set up. I wasn't feeling too good; maybe it was the early morning chocolate. My stomach hurt and I was told to sit and watch until I felt better.

"Are you okay?" I turned to see Hadley smiling at me with her blonde curls pulled up in a ponytail. "Dylan said you were sick."

I smiled and nodded. "I'm okay, just had too much sugar I think."

"I hate when I feel like that." Hadley laughed and scooted closer. "Are you having fun?"

"I am." I nodded and glanced back at Dylan, who was laughing at something Jason said in her ear.

"Are you two really sisters?" Hadley asked with some curiosity. "I heard a boy say that you were."

I laughed a little and shrugged. "Sometimes it feels like it."

"I had a friend once, her name was Lily," she grinned although it seemed a little sad, "she ended up moving with her mom to be with her Auntie in Oregon. We were like sisters though, I miss her."

"I'm sorry Hadley," I offered quietly and squeezed her hand in my own briefly. "Dylan's mom came back, but thankfully she's not taking her away."

"Good," her blue eyes held mine, "cause I hate to see you sad. You get sad a lot when Dylan's hurt or someone picks on her."

"Meanies." I shrug and standing up, bringing her with me. "Did you want to play with the other kids?"

Hadley looked at the group of kids from Dylan's age to mine as they sat around in a circle. "Are you going too?"

I looked over at the empty table that had paper and crayons on it. "I was going to draw."

She smiled. "Then I'll keep you company."

We sat quietly for a few minutes before I looked up at Hadley while she was blowing a few stray curls from her eyes. She was concentrating hard on whatever she was drawing and I smiled, feeling myself blush just like I did whenever I'd see Jaiden. "Had?"

"Hmm?" She peeked up from her paper with a soft grin.

"Did you want to play with Dylan and me at recesses?" I asked her, feeling a nervous flutter in my stomach.

"Really?" Hadley grinned even wider and I nodded. "Yes!"

"Cool." I nodded and licked my lips. "Had?"

"Hmm?" She peered at me again.

"I like you." I confessed, a warm feeling rushing through my cheeks.

But then I noticed she was as red as I was feeling and her grin turned into a shyer smile. "I like you too, Luc."

I blushed openly and went back down to my drawing. It was no longer of a hockey player with the number '11' on the jersey – it was a curly haired girl drawing her own picture across from me.

**--**

**Ashley's PoV**

I pulled up to her driveway and heard laughter coming from down by the snowy docks. I placed my bag down on the porch and noticed Spencer and Carmen in a game of one on one on the homemade rink on the ice.

It was kind of like old times, watching them play together and against each other in their games. Spencer had pushed her into a snow bank, scoring a goal. She was never gentle with Carmen and that kind of gave me some satisfaction.

"That was a pussy push, Carlin!" I heard Carmen yell as she brushed herself off.

"Whatever loser," Spencer laughed, "you got your ass beat again and you're just embarrassed."

"Embarrassed?" Carmen laughed. "No one's here to see that you won!"

I smirked.

Should I have made myself known?

"People will believe me." Spencer said seriously as she stopped skating around Carmen.

"Who, Ashley?"

"Fuck yeah she will." Spencer laughed and I decided to keep myself quiet a little bit longer.

"I still have to wonder why she isn't here." I heard Carmen chuckle. "You two have the perfect opportunity to have the house to yourselves for some hot lesbian sex."

"If you thought she was here, why'd you drop by?" Spencer asked.

"Maybe I wanted some action too- ouch!" I watched quietly as Spencer shoved her back in the snow.

"I will not be sharing Ashley, thank you." Spencer knelt down beside the other woman. "Eat snow, bitch." She laughed and shoved snow down Carmen's jersey, earning a yelp.

I laughed and shook my head at how immature they still were but it also made me happy to know that Spencer was just as loyal to me as ever. Regardless.

"You totally missed my mouth and put that down my shirt on purpose!" Carmen screeched. "I knew you wanted me!"

"In your dreams!" The blonde sang and I noticed them taking off their skates.

I remained still, not caring if they saw me standing at the top of the long stairs.

Carmen reached me first and her smile grew. "Hey sex kitten."

"How's the snow?" I raised an eyebrow and she stuck her tongue out, walking passed me. "Hey." I grinned when Spencer reached me and smiled wide. "Nice teenager act."

"Mmm, care for an encore?" Spencer waggled her eyebrows, taking off her beanie cap. "I'm all sweaty… I could use a nice hot shower…"

"Spence!" I warned and stepped away. "Your hormones never turn off, do they?"

"Do yours?" She raised an eyebrow.

"So not the point." I laughed and shook my head, following her to the house, but not before grabbing her hockey stick and helmet. I missed doing that for her.

"Not that I'm not happy to see you but what are you doing here?" Spencer asked, her arm looping through mine.

"Hoping we'd have some hot crazy lesbian sex on your bedroom floor again." I shrugged and she turned to face me, jaw slacked.

"I knew it was somewhere other than the bed!" Carmen laughed and stopped as soon as Spencer glared at her. "Okay well I'm going to go and uh, find me a hot brunette with blue eyes who is currently out with a hot teenager… yea, see you tonight."

Spencer looked at me again and raised an eyebrow, her fingers grabbing my hips. "So, about that sex…"

"How about we start the dinner?" I suggested and kissed her on the cheek.

"That sounds kinky but," Spencer shrugged, "sex sounds better."

Once in the house, Spencer went straight towards the kitchen and I followed her. We got into an easy routine of grabbing the things we needed to fix the dinner. There was no occasion, just a reason to visit I guess.

I looked at the clock and realized it was about time the girls would be getting dropped off by Jason's parents.

"Whew," Spencer spun around after mixing the salad and placing it in the fridge, "I think all we have to do is throw the roast in the oven and start the potatoes."

"Good." I nodded and wiped my hands on a towel after doing up a few of the dishes. I had to admit that this side of Spencer, the mother and housewife part of her was just, captivating. Then she looked at me with those husky grey bluish eyes and I laughed, shaking my head, "put those sex eyes away Spence."

"These aren't my sex eyes Ashley," Spencer blinked with a coy smile. "Okay, they are."

I knew it.

"Come on," I smiled as I heard the front door open with the girls' laughter filling the house yet again. "And Carmen calls me the sex kitten." I muttered.

"You so are." Spencer mumbled and enveloped Dylan in a hug.

Everything seemed to be going to smooth, I loved it.

**--**

**Next time in Points Underneath**

_"Ugh," Carmen moaned, "please tell me you're not one of those pervy guys who drool over the hot lesbian and make up all different kind of fantasies?"_

__

"Carmen!" Ryn scowled.

"What? I'm sorry, but Alex does not need to be seen that way. She's like – a little sister and I don't need nor do I want those images floating around in my head." She hissed back and then looked at Sammy, "no offence."

_"I'm on Carm's side with this one." Ashley shrugged. _


	53. Bonus Lost Chapter

**Complete Filler ("Lost Chapter")**

**Sammy's PoV**

After dropping Jaiden off at the café, I made my way back to the hotel to try and get some writing done. Being in Kenora had definitely made me slack a whole lot but for the first time, I was welcoming the distraction.

I made my way up to my hotel room and stopped when I noticed Carmen standing at my door with a smile on her face and her left hand behind her back. "Hey," I said slowly, stopping in front of her.

"Hey." Carmen smiled and moved aside so I could unlock my door. "So uh, how was your day with Jaiden?"

I played with my fingers a little and bit my lip. "It was good, she's a great person to hang out with."

She nodded slowly and smiled a little. "I'm so not good at this," she muttered under her breath.

"At what?" I asked a little amused, unlocking my hotel room door and pushing it open, but still standing in the doorway.

"Falling over myself to impress a woman." Carmen sighed, blushing a little. I raised an eyebrow and held back a smile. The Carmen Mandez I knew was constantly hitting on Spencer or picking up ladies and then dropping them within weeks.

"You're a charmer Mandez," I laughed and she just looked at me and frowned. "Oh," I stopped smiling and shifted from foot to foot, "you're being serious."

"Carmen does not fall over herself to impress just anyone." She looked at me like I was crazy. "So, this is for you." She pulled out a long stemmed red rose from behind her back, "don't hurt yourself on the thorns." She whispered.

I looked at her in shock and carefully took the rose from her, our fingers touching briefly. "Carm, thank you," I breathed.

"Spencer is having a dinner party tonight and I was wondering if you'd like to join us- I mean, be my date?" Her grey eyes glanced around the hallway before they landed nervously on me.

I had to say that the side of Carmen I was observing was a little – odd. I wasn't used to it. She liked to insult me or flirt with me, never nervous or awkward.

"Can you ask me in a more 'Carmen' like way?" I smirked.

"Jesus," she muttered and rolled her eyes, "go with me to Spencer's stupid dinner?"

"Wow, you really are a charmer." I laughed and she stared at me. "Yes, I will go with you," I said softer that time and she grinned.

"You're really one tough woman to impress." Carmen frowned again. "Usually I have them falling all over me but you, Samantha Taylor, are definitely something else."

"So I've been told." I shrugged with a grin and stepped aside. "Would you like to come in?"

"Actually I promised Spashley I'd pick up some macaroni salad and a few drinks. Would you like to join me?" Carmen held my gaze and I nodded silently. "We can put that in water first." She pointed to my rose and took it from me.

I watched her delicately cut the bottom of the rose and place it in the ice bucket. "Romantic," I grinned from the doorway.

"Isn't it?" Her grey eyes danced and I felt myself blush. After she made sure the rose was in the perfect spot, she walked towards me and grabbed my hand. "Ready?"

Definitely.

**--**


	54. Insert Foot Here

_So there will be some drama coming up in the near future, especially involving Alex's return. I'm prepared for arguments on who was right and who was wrong when it comes to Spashley vs Alex Carlin. In the meantime, enjoy! I don't own SoN._

**44.1 - Insert Foot - Here**

**Spencer's PoV**

Ryn had shown up with her new man candy of the month. Tristan was nice enough and it turned out he had five nieces and no nephews, so he knew how to interact with the girls quite easily. However, the moment he said he wasn't a fan of hockey, all bets were off.

The look on Lucas' face was priceless and Dylan drilled him about the sports he did like.

Tennis? Curling? Seriously?

"Are you sure he isn't a little gay?" I whispered into Ryn's ear.

"Spence!" She hissed. "Be nice."

"Your last boyfriend left you for a man…" I shrugged and she pouted. We laughed about it but at first it was traumatizing for her. I could only imagine.

"I think we're almost ready to sit down," Ashley came up to us in the living room and leaned against the back of the couch, watching Dylan frown at Tristan's explanation of how tennis was played.

I eyed her up like she was some sort of sex candy. What? I couldn't help it while I was around her. Her tight jeans and barely-there sweater that hung off her shoulders weren't making the thoughts of her in provocative positions go away. She really was teasing me.

"Lucas, Dyl," I walked up to them and placed one hand on each of their heads, "you mind going to wash up before dinner, please?"

Dylan was the first to jump up and run towards the washroom, Lucas close behind.

"Thank you for having me over, Spencer." Tristan smiled and looked over at Ryn, who was helping Ashley set the table.

"Please," I rolled me eyes playfully, "Ryn's been talking about you non-stop, I had to meet you."

The tall brunette grinned, his green eyes smiling over towards his girlfriend.

"However," I leaned towards him, "if you ever hurt her, I promise it'll come back tenfold on you," I patted his chest and nodded, plastering a smile on my face, "hungry?"

"Are we late?!" Carmen came in, snow topping her head along with Sammy's. "It's so slippery out there, I drove slow."

"Like a snail, slow." Sammy remarked with a grin and received an eye roll from Carmen. "It smells so good in here."

"Thanks." I grinned and turned to Ashley, "Davies did most of the work."

Ashley widened her eyes and shook her head. "No way, I just helped."

"I observed." I nodded and pinched Ashley on the cheek softly. "Don't be shy babe, you're a talented cook."

Especially those breakfasts in bed meals she'd cook me back in high school.

"She is!" Dylan came back from the washroom and hugged Carmen. "Is Sammy your girlfriend?"

Ryn held back a chuckle and I raised an eyebrow at Carmen. "Yea, is she?"

"Spencer." Ashley admonished softly but smiled as she did so.

"Uh," Sammy laughed, her eyes scanning the people in the house while waiting for the answer, "I don't think we're quite there yet."

Carmen nodded slowly and bit her lip. "Yea."

And cue awkward moment.

"Well the potatoes are done, all we need is for the chairs to be occupied and we're ready!" Ryn piped up and everyone started to gather into the dining room.

I sat next to Ashley, who sat next to Dylan. I eyed up Lucas across from me, who grinned and stole a carrot off Carmen's plate when she wasn't looking. The dinner was running smoothly and the small talk wasn't awkward.

"Ryn tells me you're not originally from here," Tristan looks at me with a smile. "Where are you from?"

"Midtown, Ontario." I cleared my throat and smiled as Ashley nudged me. "Ash is from B.C."

Tristan looked amused and nodded. "So what brings you two here?"

"Tris," Ryn laughed and lightly tapped his hand.

"Actually," Ashley smiled and patted the corner of her lip with a napkin, "Dylan is what brought me here, I mean, now. Thanks to your lovely girlfriend and Spencer, she's been in very good hands while I've been … away."

Dylan smiled at her mom and went back to eating her food.

"Mom and Ashley used to be girlfriends." Lucas shrugged. "Right?" Her grey eyes scanned mine and then Ashley's.

"Yes." I nodded and Ashley smiled back at my daughter.

"Interesting," Tristan grinned and took a drink before clearing his throat, "so is this like a high school reunion? The four of you went to school together, right?"

"Well when you put it that way," Carmen laughed, "I actually went to their rival school. I kicked Spencer's ass on the ice."

"Whatever." I sighed and watched as Dylan quietly held out her hand and beamed when Carmen gave her a dollar. "I think at this rate, I'm going to have the girls support us." I waggled my eyebrows at Ashley.

"Funny." Carmen sneered but winked in my direction. "Sammy went to school with them. She was only let into cool crowd because she was dating Alex."

Alex.

Wow.

It had been the first time in over a week that her name was even mentioned. I had talked to my mom earlier that week and she was telling me that Alex was about to wrap up her tour. Paula knew Alex and I weren't on speaking terms, and when I told her about Ashley and Dylan, she… well, she did what she did best in surprised situations: fainted.

Alex wasn't mentioned since, really.

"Oh, so you liked guys?" Tristan raised an eyebrow in the brunette's direction.

"Uh no," I frowned and threw a look over at Ryn, "did you not tell him that aside from you, we're all just a bunch of lesbos?"

Ryn's eyes widened and she cleared her throat. "I guess it never came up?"

"Well, Alex is my younger sister – Sam dated her for years." I cleared the air and Tristan nodded his head slowly before he looked at Ryn.

"Carlin? As in Alex Carlin?" He looked like he had just won a grand prize.

"Ugh," Carmen moaned, "please tell me you're not one of those pervy guys who drool over the hot lesbian and make up all different kind of fantasies?"

"Carmen!" Ryn scowled.

"What? I'm sorry, but Alex does not need to be seen that way. She's like – a little sister and I don't need nor do I want those images floating around in my head." She hissed back and then looked at Sammy, "no offence."

"I'm on Carm's side with this one." Ashley shrugged and looked at Lucas, who was frowning. "What's wrong Luc?"

"Where is Aunt Alex anyway?" She scratched her head. "Nana said she was done touring, shouldn't she be here?"

Ashley and I looked at each other and I couldn't tell you what exactly her expressions were, but they matched my own.

"I'm sorry," Tristan blushed and shook her head, "I don't mean any disrespect and no, I've never thought of her that way at all," he cleared his throat, "it's just that my nieces love her and this is just a nice surprise is all."

"Oh." Carmen clamped her mouth shut and I did the same.

"Insert foot here." Sammy patted Carmen's lips with a soft smile, trying to break the tension.

"Seriously," Lucas kicked my ankle from under the table, "is she going to be coming back soon?"

I-

Would she?

"Luc, I don't know." I sighed and went back to picking at my salad.

"I'm sorry for making this conversation awkward." Tristan frowned, throwing all of us an apologetic look. "Kathryn hasn't went into detail so without them, I'm one to uh, assume."

"It's okay." I shrugged and patted his hand. "Ryn likes to leave out the juicy details because she's a sucker for intense dramatic awkward moments."

"Guilty." Ryn blushed but shot me a dirty look.

"So how was the birthday party?" Ashley asked the girls, trying to steer clear from anymore uncomfortable talks.

"Good," Lucas answered first, "I got sick but Hadley kept me company."

"Cute curly blonde?" I raised a teasing eyebrow and her cheeks turned a little red.

"And Jason gave me one of his presents!" Dylan grinned.

"Well that was nice of him," Ashley grinned and ruffled her daughter's perfect curls, "what did he give you?"

"A limited edition of the Kenora Thistles hockey puck!" Dylan beamed and scooted out of her chair. She was stopped by Ashley's gentle hand on her arm. "I wanna show you," the little Ashley-version pouted.

"And you can," Ashley smiled softly, "after we finish eating."

I watched as Dylan stared into her mother's eyes before breaking into a soft blush and sitting down. "Sorry, I got excited."

"That's a pretty valuable gift he gave you kiddo," Carmen piped up, "I think he likes you."

"Does not!" Dylan looked at her with wide eyes.

"Oh he does too, Dylly." Lucas grinned and wiggled her eyebrows.

"Lukey!"

"Girls." I said in a firm tone but with a smile. "Please, not with guests?"

"Sorry mom." They both mumbled and my heart kind of – skipped a few beats.

Dylan looked just as shocked as I did. Her mouth opened and closed before she looked at Ashley, who was surprisingly looking amused but still a little taken aback. I felt all pairs of eyes on me and I couldn't help but squeak out a 'what?'

"I'm sorry Spencer." Dylan was almost in tears and I frowned, shaking my head.

"No baby," I said quickly and reached over Ashley to grab Dylan's hand, "please don't be sorry, not for that."

Her brown eyes were cast downwards as she nodded. I could feel Ashley's breath on my neck as I was still leaning over her to hold her daughter's hand.

Dylan had called me mom for the first time. She had called me mom in front of her mother. My heart was still beating wildly in my chest when Ashley smiled at me. The moment was ruined when Dylan scooted her chair back and ran up to her bedroom, shutting the door quietly.

Ashley stopped me from getting up out of my seat. "Let me," she whispered and politely excused herself.

Tristan and Ryn exchanged quiet looks while Carmen and Sammy were eye-fucking each other. I closed my eyes and opened them to find Lucas standing beside me, her arms slowly wrapped around my shoulders. "You're the best, mom." She whispered and kissed my cheek.

I didn't know why she complimented me with that, but I didn't question it. I smiled and thanked her.

"So, guess what Luc?" Sammy spoke up and took a sip of her drink.

"What?" My daughter grinned.

"I have four tickets to the Leafs game and I need two more people to come with me…" her blue eyes danced as she leaned forward, grinning wildly at Lucas.

"LEAFS?!" Lucas screeched and shot up out of her seat. "Shut up!"

"I certainly will not." Sammy chuckled and pulled them out of her purse. "So, if your mom and Ashley will let you and Dylan go, I was hoping Carmen and I could take you?"

"Me?" Carmen whispered in awe.

"Duh." Sammy shrugged and looked at me. "The game is next month and it's not until Christmas break so the girls won't be missing any school…"

"Mom! Please?!" Lucas looked at me with her grey puppy dog eyes and pout.

Ugh.

"We'll see." I nodded with a smile, looking back towards the spiral staircase where Ashley and Dylan disappeared too.

"That's totally a yes." Lucas squealed and settled back into her seat, knowing full well that she could freak out later on _after_ dinner.

**--**

**Next time in Points Underneath**

_"Look," Carmen sighed, "Spencer's happy. She has been walking on cloud nine ever since you've been back and I just have to thank you. I didn't like to see her sad or upset and using other women – she's not me."_

__

I chewed on my nails briefly and was happy inside to know that I made some sort of difference in the blonde's life.

_"But make no mistake Davies," Carmen leaned in closer and her voice lowered quietly, "you seriously break her heart again, I'm not going to be standing right by her side," she quickly looked behind her to see if anyone was coming, "I'll be out gunning for your ass."_


	55. Snowflakes Aren't The Only Things Fallin

**Flashbacks are in **_italics._

**This flashback was taken from **Wash It All Away – **Chapter 57.2: **_**A Home Within A Choice**_

**44.2 - Snowflakes Aren't The Only Things Falling**

**Ashley's PoV**

"Hey babygirl," I knocked softly on Dylan's bedroom door and opened it, to find her face first in her pillow, "can I come in?"

She grunted and I took it as a yes. "I'm sorry."

"For what?" I smiled softly as she peeked at me through the space between her arm and pillow.

"I called her mom." Dylan sat up and hung her head.

"You did," I couldn't help but smile a little, "and there's nothing wrong with that."

"But she's not you!" Dylan gasped and scowled.

"No," I shrugged, Spencer was much better than me, "but listen," I tucked a lose curl behind her ear and pulled her into a hug, "we've talked about this before Dyl and I think you calling her that made her really happy."

"She's too nice to say otherwise." Dylan sniffled.

"Did you see the way her eyes lit up?" I pulled back and cupped her small face. "She loves you just as much as I do," I whispered because I knew it was true, "so calling her 'mom' is completely okay."

"But-"

"-and I'm not upset." I peered at her through honest eyes. "If you're worried that I'm upset or jealous, you don't need to be baby, okay? In fact," I whispered as if what I was about to say was a huge secret, "I really liked hearing you call her that."

"You did?" Dylan blushed with a small smile.

I nodded and kissed her forehead softly. "Come on," I pulled her up to her feet, "let's finish our food so you can show me your awesome hockey puck your boyfriend gave you."

"MOM!" She screeched as we entered the hallway, "He's not my boyfriend!"

"IS TOO!" We heard Lucas yell from downstairs and chuckled.

"Come on." I nudged her lightly and grabbed her hand.

The rest of the dinner went smoothly. No one managed putting their foot in their mouths either. I helped Spencer clear the table and she batted me away from the kitchen, telling me I had done enough for the evening and she sit my gorgeous ass down on the couch and relax. I smirked.

She wanted me.

//

_"Damn your girl is fast on that ice." Carmen laughed as she sat beside me by the concession._

__

Don't I know it.

"And hot." I murmured, sipping on my third hot chocolate of the day.

"Should I be wise and not answer that?" Carmen asked, chuckling as I smirked at her. "Nah, Spencer loves the game and she shows it. I've come to the conclusion that I rather enjoy playing with her than against her."

I smiled and nodded, watching Carmen's profile as she looked down at the rink where the zamboni was polishing the ice for another game later on in the day. "Hey Carm," her grey eyes met mine, chewing on her bottom lip while she fiddled with her jersey, "I'm sorry for everything."

_"Don't worry about it," she shrugged it off, "I get where you're coming from. Trust me." She stood up as Spencer made our way towards us. "Treat her good though Davies or else I make no promises."_

//

"Hey," Carmen sat next to me on the couch and smiled.

"Hi." I sat up a little and heard Spencer laughing in the kitchen with Sammy and Ryn. Tristan braved the snowstorm to have a smoke.

"So listen," she shifted to face me, "I wasn't exactly the nicest person when it came to you and I wanted to apologize for some of it."

"Some of it?" I raised my eyebrows.

"Well yea," she shrugged but smiled anyway, "I mean, you deserved the other parts. Like leaving a gorgeous blonde alone on grad day."

I narrowed my eyes a little defensively. "You didn't seem so concerned at the time, being there with her family and all."

"Oh please Ashley, get off of it." Carmen scoffed with a laugh. "That morning you came to her at the arena and completely broke it off with her, I was in the locker room. I had to hear her cry over you for years; not _days_, not _weeks_, not even _months_ – but **years**."

"That is-"

"-none of my business, I know." She waved it off and curled her feet up, getting more comfortable. "I spent practically every single day with Spencer and yes, it felt good but she looked like shit. I tried to get her to move on and you know, she just didn't want too."

"Is this a guilt trip? Because I've been through it, I'm living it." I said firmly and she just shrugged.

"Look," Carmen sighed, "Spencer's happy. She has been walking on cloud nine ever since you've been back and I just have to thank you. I didn't like to see her sad or upset and using other women – she's not me."

I chewed on my nails briefly and was happy inside to know that I made some sort of difference in the blonde's life.

"But make no mistake Davies," Carmen leaned in closer and her voice lowered quietly, "you seriously break her heart again, I'm not going to be standing right by her side," she quickly looked behind her to see if anyone was coming, "I'll be out gunning for your ass."

I sat back and frowned.

"Other than the whole leaving her heartbroken, some of the things I said about you were just out of anger." Carmen patted my knee. "And for that I am sorry."

"It's okay, I wasn't exactly saying nice things about you either." I shrugged. "I apologize as well."

"Well," she bit her lip, "I've never slept with her, which I'm sure you know by now. Just know that I tried."

I had to laugh because Carmen was just being – Carmen. She liked the attention and to think she was hot stuff. I had to admit she did get a little hotter in her late twenties. Long raven hair always tucked behind her ears, her grey eyes sparkling.

"But she is a good kisser, right?" I raised an eyebrow.

"Fuck. Yes." Carmen nodded with a snicker.

"Language!" Spencer came around the corner and plopped herself in the middle between us. Lucky for Carmen, the girls were upstairs getting ready for bed. "So what are we fucking?"

I nearly spit out my water and Spencer chuckled.

"I should rephrase that." She said innocently. "Are my two favourite big people getting along?"

"We are." I smiled and leaned back a bit more.

"Good, because judging how bad it's snowing out there and the road is closed, we're all kind of stuck here tonight." Spencer patted my knee and stood up again. "Uh, I have two other spare rooms; the study has a pull out couch so I'm giving it to Ryn and Tristan. You and Sammy can have Alex's room."

Odd.

"Sweet," Carmen rolled her eyes, "sharing a bed with Alex's ex in Alex's bed. That won't be awkward."

"Whatever, you want my bed?" Spencer raised an eyebrow.

"Uh no," Carmen laughed and stood up, "the spare is fine." She skipped out of the living room and into the kitchen.

I glanced at Spencer and smiled, "so are the girls ready for bed?"

"Almost, they're huddled under the blanket talking about the Maple Leafs game Sam wants to take them to." Spencer grinned and moved so that she could face me. "Is it okay that Dyl goes?"

I nodded. "Only if the roads are clear."

"Deal." Spencer grinned and cupped the back of my neck, "so, I hope you don't mind but I was hoping maybe you'd spend the night in my bed, with me?"

I tilted my head and hid the smile within. "What about the girls?"

Spencer bit her lip. "We'll sneak you in after they're sleeping. We'll be up long before they wake in the morning."

I wished we could tell them about 'us' but at the same time, I didn't even know what 'us' meant. It wasn't exactly discussed and yes, we've slept together once but that didn't change the fact that we were in a delicate situation anymore.

'Us' also involved two little girls.

I smiled and squeezed her hand, "you know I could just take this couch."

Spencer scoffed and frowned. "No way Ash, I will not allow you to sleep on the couch," she glanced at her lap and furrowed her eyebrows, "do you not want too?"

"Spence," I smiled softly, "you know I do. I just don't exactly know- I mean… what are we?"

Spencer sat back and raised an eyebrow. "What do you mean?"

"I mean," I sighed, "you and me… what are we?"

"Hot?" Spencer smiled and stopped when I looked at her seriously. She still had a problem at taking some things seriously.

"Spencer." I sighed and she cleared her throat.

"I really don't know." She confessed in a soft whisper.

I nodded and moved to get up but she grabbed me and pulled me into her lap, her arms wrapping around my waist. "I don't think I've told you just how beautiful you are lately," she whispered, her eyes boring into mine, "because you really take my breath away every time I see you."

She couldn't take certain things seriously but she still had a way with words.

I melted.

"Spence," I blushed and she squeezed my hips, kissing my cheek softly.

"Should we leave you two alone?" Carmen came in the room with another bottle of beer in one hand, and Sammy's hand in the other.

I think it was safe to say Carmen got the girl and freaked out over nothing.

"Um," Spencer smiled and I stood up, "actually, we're just going to go check on the girls."

"Save this spot for me," I whispered to Sammy, who smiled as I was tugged up towards the stairs with Spencer. "Look at that snow," I gasped as we passed the large window in the hallway between the bathroom and Dylan's room, "wow, I can't even see the lake."

Spencer stopped and stepped to my side, her eyes lighting up at the thick and heavy snow flakes falling right outside. We stood there for a few minutes in silence and then I felt her hand find mine, lacing her fingers loosely with my own. I could feel her eyes on me briefly and I smiled a little, squeezing her hand. "Everything." She whispered.

"What?" I blinked and looked at her.

"You asked me what we were," she replied quietly, her eyes flickering to look back out towards the icy lake, "we're everything."

A few more moments passed and I turned to face her, cupping her face and pressing my lips against hers softly. "Everything," I breathed against her lips and I felt her smile.

We pulled apart and quickly made our way to Dylan's room, finding the bed empty. Spencer chuckled softly and walked across the hall to see her daughter passed out on one end of the bed with the blanket over her face while Dylan's head was resting on the blonde's stomach, fast asleep.

"They had a big day," Spencer whispered and moved into the room carefully. She pulled another blanket over Dylan and quickly gave a kiss on both of their foreheads. I followed suit, briefly hesitating on kissing Lucas but in a way, it felt natural.

We closed the door and Spencer leaned against it, looking at me. "Dyl was upset about letting 'mom' slip out, wasn't she?"

"A little." I nodded. "She was more upset because she thought that I'd be mad."

"Are you?" Spencer asked, her eyes shifting from my lips to my eyes.

"No," I laughed quietly and licked my lips, "it actually makes me happy inside."

"Me too." Spencer blushed and pulled me back towards the stairs.

**--**

**Sammy's PoV**

Her hair was pulled back tightly and her sweater that she had on was carelessly lying on the floor. I watched as she turned the page and began to read some more. My feet were crossed and I could hear the crackling of the fire in the living room with smooth voices that belonged to Spencer and Ashley. I was happy they were getting along so well – after all that had happened.

"Carm," I whispered and she frowned a little bit, bringing the book closer to her face as she continued to read. I sighed and scratched my cheek before kneeling up on the mattress and looking straight at her, "Carmen."

Nothing.

We had made out for the longest time before she pulled back and told me she was thirsty. Carmen went up to get a drink and came back with an interesting book instead.

Really?

It was a lesbian erotica book as well. You know the ones the Nicole Foster edits? The good ones.

What I didn't understand was that she had a hot lesbian in the same bed as her yet she still wanted to read about them?

I leaned forward a bit more and tried to make more eye contact with her. "Carmen," I whispered, blowing some of my light brown hair away from my eyes.

She didn't budge.

I sighed in frustration and was about to take her book away but decided against it. Instead, I stepped off the bed and stood there, my hands grasping the edge of my hoodie, slowly dragging it up, over my ribs until it was off completely.

I was completely topless.

She still wasn't looking.

"For fuck sakes Carmen!" I hissed and she jumped, looking up and dropping the book from her hand. I was wearing a scowl but she didn't know that because she was gawking at my breasts. I leaned forward and picked up my shirt, about to pull it back on when I felt her shoot up and throw it clear across the room. "I've been trying to get your attention," I whispered as her grey eyes darkened instantly. I moved my hand to her hair and undid the ponytail. Her straight hair falling over her shoulders in that sexy way only she managed to pull off.

"You have it," she husked in a tone that I had never heard before, "all of it." Her hands were on my bare waist, her thumbs moving in slow circles up my ribcage, but that time her eyes were on mine.

I felt her muscles flex and before I knew it, I was on my back and her mouth was hot on mine.

Oh yeah, I definitely had her attention.

I could _feel_ her attention as soon as she pressed her thigh between my legs.

And just like the snow outside, I just kept on falling into everything she had to offer me.

**--**

**Spencer's PoV**

I yawned sleepily as we made our way to my bedroom. Ashley had fallen asleep with her head in my lap while we were watching an old movie and I knew she would end up getting a cramp in her neck if she stayed like that any longer.

It was well passed midnight and I could hear movement coming from the room Carmen and Sammy were sharing. It didn't take a genius to figure out what was going on there. Ryn and Tristan left the den room door open so I knew with the lights off they were fast asleep. Plus Ryn had a thing about having sex under the same roof as children – it freaked her out.

It was a good thing she wasn't planning on having any.

"I seepy," Ashley mumbled as we reached the bed. She flopped down almost face first and yawned, kicking off her pants, leaving her in white boy shorts.

I smiled and undressed myself, throwing Ashley an extra jersey from my closet.

"I still have the one you gave me for graduation," she whispered quietly while putting the blue jersey on. It wasn't one I wore for a team I played, it was one that was given to me by Carmen when she thought I was going to have a boy.

"Good," I managed to pull down the covers without tripping over my own feet because Ashley took off her underwear in front of me. "Uh," I cleared my throat and did a happy dance inside.

"I hate sleeping in underwear," she shrugged, her brown eyes smiling.

"Me too." I nodded and quickly discarded mine before sliding under the covers. "What are your plans for tomorrow?"

"Oh," Ashley smacked her forehead with her hand and scowled as she rubbed it gently, "I completely forgot to tell you that I found the perfect small house."

"Really?" I asked excitedly. "Where?"

"Here, in Keewatin I mean," she bounced a little bit on the bed and settled briefly, "I actually saw one in Lakeside but decided against it."

Lakeside was a neighbourhood at least twenty minutes away; Kenora's biggest community which also held the Recreation Centre.

"It's a good place though, Ash," I frowned.

"I know," she shrugged and leaned against the head board, "but I've been reading up on the school systems and how they work," she looked out the window where the snow had started to ease off a bit, "if we move there, Dylan would have to go to King George instead of Keewatin Public."

Oh.

"Oh." I frowned and chewed on my bottom lip.

"I wouldn't want to be the one to rip her and Luc apart, you know?" Ashley smiled and shrugged. "So I found this cute house I'm going to look at tomorrow. It's on McLean Avenue."

"Ou!" My ears perked up a bit. "That's not even a ten minute ride from here!"

Ashley laughed softly. "Actually," she moved and pointed out towards the window. My bedroom faced the lake and with the snow settling down, seeing across it was a little more visible, "it's right across there. Not exactly waterfront, but I can still see your house from it."

I grinned even wider and stepped behind her, my chin resting on her shoulder. "I hope you get it," I whispered.

"I know I will," she looked over her shoulder and me and smiled lightly, "I have the money Spence, I mean," she played with my fingers, "I have all that inheritance money and then I still get a percentage from Alex because we wrote those songs together. All of them."

"Wow," I breathed and smiled, "that's really good, Ash."

"I also have a job interview on Monday." She laughed softly and made her way back towards the bed. "It was the weirdest thing, I was actually at the girls' school today meeting Dylan's teachers. I know, you would never catch me in a school on a Saturday twelve years ago, right?"

"Yea." I chuckled and crawled under the covers, waiting for her to continue.

"So the Principal, Mrs. Todd, asked me about what I've been doing with myself career wise and I told her the truth, you know? I mean, Dyl's older now and her name is back to Davies, so I told her about working on Alex's albums in the beginning and how I took classes for music and entrepreneurship." Ashley spoke in a confident tone that I had to admit I never really heard before. It was refreshing.

"Did she offer you a position at the school?" I sounded like an excited school girl.

"Ha," she chuckled and shook her head, "no but she did say that they were looking for a music teacher at the public high school. She would put a good word in for me as long as I gathered up some references."

"Ashley!" I squealed quietly and pulled her in for a hug. "That is awesome!"

Ashley pulled back, her eyes burning into my own. "This is an amazing feeling," she whispered, "and every time I think about it, I feel like I don't deserve it."

I frowned and pressed my forehead against hers. "You do though," I ran my thumb gently over her lips softly, "more than you'll know."

I was proud of her.

I was happy to see her brown eyes sparkle and to see just how genuine her smile was.

It made me happy.

_She_ made me happy.

**--**

**Next time in Points Underneath:**

_"Are you sure your parents won't be mad at us for not seeing them?" Tracey asked, turning up the heat a little._

__

"We saw them two weeks ago," I smiled sleepily, and looked at the window, my mind immediately going towards Lucas, "besides, I miss my niece."

Tracey nodded and gripped the steering wheel firmly yet again, her eyes straight ahead on the road.

_It seemed like the shortest ride of my life and a part of me wasn't ready to see the long driveway we were about to turn down. What and who was behind those solid walls scared the hell out of me._


	56. The Dawn Is Breaking

**45.1 - The Dawn Is Breaking**

**Alex's PoV**

It was white - very white and bright as the sun started to shine over the cold looking horizon. I blinked a few times and yawned, stretching my feet as far as I could since I was sitting in the passenger side of my burnt orange Jeep Wrangler Rubicon. Tracey gripped the wheel as she took a right and I licked my lips, sitting up as we passed large billboards stating we were close to Kenora.

Right after my show the night before, I didn't even stick around to throw an after-tour party. Tracey and I packed up and caught the earliest flight to Winnipeg, where we had left my jeep in the parking lot. Luckily we touched down just before the snow storm hit.

"Are you sure your parents won't be mad at us for not seeing them?" Tracey asked, turning up the heat a little.

"We saw them two weeks ago," I smiled sleepily, and looked at the window, my mind immediately going towards Lucas, "besides, I miss my niece."

Tracey nodded and gripped the steering wheel firmly yet again, her eyes straight ahead on the road.

It seemed like the shortest ride of my life and a part of me wasn't ready to see the long driveway we were about to turn down. What and who was behind those solid walls scared the hell out of me.

I felt sick.

"Alex," Tracey stopped the car halfway down the long rough snow covered driveway, "we can turn around right now and go for a coffee or something. Who knows, maybe Spencer's still sleeping."

Spencer still sleeping? Tracey knew Spencer never slept in unless she had sex the previous night.

I rolled my eyes.

"We're already here," I sighed and she moved the jeep forward slowly, glancing at me every so often, "babe, I'm sure."

"Okay." Tracey tucked her long strand of hair behind her ear and nodded, pulling up to what usually was an empty driveway. There was an unfamiliar looking mustang, an SUV and a Camero parked beneath a pile of snow. "Wow, party central."

"Yea," I frowned in curiousity and realized the only vehicle I recognized was Ryn's midnight blue SUV.

"Are you su-" Tracey was silenced when I kissed her briefly.

"Stop asking me." I whispered and she cut off the engine, putting on her black hat and opening the door. Our breaths could be seen in the air because it was cold.

I missed being out here.

Tracey grabbed my hand and we slowly made our way towards the front of the house, making fresh footprints in the snow.

I heard movement inside and licked my lips, my knuckles making it to the door and then it was ripped open. I stood face to face with a tall brunette guy with green eyes and the biggest dimples. I frowned.

_Spencer._ I cured her silently.

"Hey," I said awkwardly and he looked slightly surprised.

"Hi." He whispered with head nod and slipped outside, pulling out a cigarette from his coat pocket.

"Who are you?" I frowned even deeper.

"Oh wow," he laughed softly and held out his hand, "I'm Tristan, forgive my rudeness."

"Tristan, there you ar-" Ryn's voice came from behind me and I turned around to face the redhead. "Alex?!" Her eyes were wide and she grabbed a coat and boots, rushing outside to give me a hug. "Wow, it's been awhile."

I smiled and hugged her back. "Yea…"

"Nice to see you too Tracey," she smiled at my fiancée and then her arm looped through the tall man's, "I see you've met my boyfriend, Tristan."

"Oh." Wow, I was embarrassed by my assumption and rudeness. "I'm Alex and this is my fiancée Tracey, forgive my rudeness." I laughed nervously and he grinned.

"Can I have your autograph?" Tristan asked excitedly. "My nieces will call me the coolest uncle on the planet."

"Yea?" I laughed and agreed. "I'll be happy to help."

"Cool." He smiled and held up his cigarette. "I hate smoking around people so I'm going to quickly take a walk." Tristan leaned forward and kissed Ryn on the cheek before trudging through the untouched snow down towards the docks.

Ryn turned to face me and grabbed my hands. "So, how was your tour?"

**--**

**Spencer's PoV**

Ashley hadn't really moved from her position all night. She was spooning me and her grip was tighter than hell.

Not that I was complaining.

Hell no.

I could feel her warm skin against my own from where our jerseys rode up and it was driving me insane.

Okay, so I was worse than a teenage boy or uh, worse than my own teenage self – but Ashley Davies was sleeping in my bed with nothing but a jersey on.

She stretched a little and her grip loosened, giving me a chance to slip away and turn over to face her. Her eyes were closed but her eyelids were fluttering slightly. I smiled and leaned forward, my lips pressing against her cheek softly and it drew a soft sigh from her lips. Ashley stretched a little more and opened her sleepy eyes, they immediately fell on mine. "Morning," she whispered and I smiled, brushing a strand of hair away from her eyes.

"Morning." I felt my heart flutter as she crinkled her nose into another wider smile.

"What time is it?" Her husky voice whispered and she sat up, running her hand through her curls.

"Guess." I smirked, sitting up with her, adjusting my jersey and leaned in, stealing a quick kiss from her.

"Five in the morning?" Ashley quirked an eyebrow.

"Uh, close," I pointed to the clock and it read seven-thirty, "you can go shower if you'd like. I'll put on a pot of coffee."

"Hey Spence," she bit her lip gently and looked at me, "I was wondering if you'd mind that I take Dylan to see the house today?"

"Ash," I laughed softly and shook my head, "you do know that she's your daughter right? You really don't need to ask me permission to take her anywhere. It could be three in the morning and you're still free to come and get her." I laughed again, lightening the mood. Ashley was blushing, looking down at the black duvet on my bed. "Hey," I lifted her chin up by my fingers and tilted my head, "she may call me mom but she's the heart to your soul."

"Spence," she chuckled and stared at me, her brown eyes twinkling, "you're such a charmer."

I wiggled my eyebrows, "so I've been told."

"By who?" She asked, her cute frown coming back.

"Uh," I shrugged, "a lot of people? Come on, even you fell for my Carlin charm. Your parents even …" I stopped when she blinked, her head dropping back down and her eyes closing tightly, "shit Ash, I'm sorry."

Stupid Carlin. Charming my ass. I clenched my fists together, chastising myself for bringing up such a topic.

It was one we never even touched on really.

"It's okay." A whisper came from her lips.

"No," I sighed and shifted, moving closer and pulling her tighter into my arms, her face pressed into my neck, "I'm so sorry."

That was when I felt her shoulders shake and a heart wrenching sob escape her. She was crying.

Hard.

All I could do was rub her back, kiss her hair, and hold her tight. I didn't have any words to bring that smile back on her face. I knew at that moment that Ashley never had the time to really mourn her parents' death. I stroked her face lightly with my hand, wiping her tears away delicately with my thumbs. "I'm here, baby."

I guess those words meant a lot to her because she tightened her grip on my jersey and pulled herself closer, tears rolling down my skin.

Time passed and finally her breathing evened out. She pulled back and wiped her face, apologizing for getting me wet. I smiled softly, not even thinking about a crude comment. "You can borrow my shoulder anytime," I whispered and cupped her face, "and whenever you're ready to talk about it, know that I'm here."

"Thank you," Ashley smiled and sniffled, laughing embarrassedly.

"Still want that shower?" I asked and moved to get up off the bed. I was held in place by her though as she kissed me with this intensity that went straight from my lips, coursing through my veins and straight to my heart. I've missed those kisses and Ashley was the only one who gave them to me. "Uh, did you want me join you in that shower?"

Ashley's husky laugh woke up other parts of my body but I quickly disregarded it when she shook her head. "As much as I'd love that, I have a feeling the girls will be up soon."

I nodded.

Lucas and Dylan would be sleeping in.

Trust me.

I didn't tell her that though because I knew I'd never want to put clothes back once we were in the shower.

"Go," I mumbled against her soft lips, "I'm going to put that coffee on."

Ashley grinned and got up off the bed. She didn't ask to dig through my closet or dresser; she just did it. She grabbed a pair of my ripped jeans and a small fitting sweater, blew me a kiss and headed for the bathroom.

I smiled and squealed once she shut the door.

I believed it was safe to say that Ashley Davies was mine.

Always was.

Always will be.

**--**

**Next time in Points Underneath:**

_"Alex, you know as far as your career is concerned, I'm proud of you. You went out and followed your dreams and I'm happy you are succeeding. Don't you ever think different," her voice was more of a whisper, "but that doesn't make me want to forgive you."_

__

I wanted to tug at my hair because the situation was frustrating. "I'm not asking for your forgiveness," I finally said, staring at my sister, "I'm just asking you to acknowledge the fact that I get it."

_"Do you?" She raised a eyebrow._


	57. Collide

**Flashbacks are in **_italics. _**This flashback was taken from **Wash It All Away – **Chapter 44.1: **_**Sister, Sister Bonding.**_

_A little heartache involved with this chapter. Everyone has a valid point, everyone could be in the wrong or in the right – either way, everyone's feelings are hurt. No worries, I'm cleaning up the mess... eventually. Enjoy! Thank you to the reviewers and readers and those sending me PM's to get my butt in gear! It's all appreciated!_

**45.2 - Collide**

**Alex's PoV**

It was cold outside, despite the snowfall they had just had the previous night. Ryn opened the front door but stopped me before I stepped foot inside. "Uh," she looked nervously between me, Tracey and the living room, "I really don't know the whole story but don't be surprised if Spencer's not exactly happy to see you."

I looked at the redheaded woman with a raised eyebrow. "I'm aware of that."

She only nodded and let Tracey and I into the warm confines of my sister's house. It was clean, freakishly clean.

"I figured there was a party last night." I turned to face Ryn, who shut the door behind herself.

"We had a dinner but with the snow, we all kind of got snowed in." She grinned and moved to leaned against the large bookshelf.

"Who else is here?" Tracey smiled and made herself comfortable on the chair beside the door. It usually occupied Lucas' hockey equipment.

"Oh uh," Ryn bit her lip, glancing up towards the spiral stairs and then back down towards the end of the hall where "my" bedroom was, "Sammy's here and-"

"Sam?" I raised an eyebrow, delighted to hear her name. "Is she in my room?"

Tracey cast a sideways glance at me and I shook my head. I just wanted to see a friend.

"Yea but really, I think she's sleeping..." Ryn said with a bit of desperation in her voice. I chuckled and waved her off, kicking off my boots and walking towards the end of the hallway, "really Alex, I think you should just-"

"Rise and shine, Sa-" I swung open the door and gasped when I found my ex-girlfriend straddling someone else. My cheeks flushed when her back muscles strained and she turned her head to look at me with a horrific look. "Oh God, I'm so sorry." I mumbled and then I caught a glimpse of the person beneath her and swallowed, my eyes narrowing slightly. I quickly slammed the door shut and glanced at Ryn, who was biting her lip.

"I tried to tell you..." She said quietly and I slowly made my way back towards Tracey and Ryn, standing by the door.

"Who the hell is slamming doors?" I looked up to see Spencer coming down the stairs, pulling her hair up in a ponytail. She stopped at the bottom, our eyes locking for the first time in, what felt like forever.

You could cut the tension with a knife.

"Hey Spence," I waved almost shyly but her eyes never even flinched.

"Alex." She addressed so in a dull voice. "What are you doing here?"

"I missed you." I swallowed and she snorted. I raised an eyebrow and she shook her head.

"Had a funny way of showing it," Spencer hissed as she walked passed the living room and towards the kitchen.

"I didn't know if you'd want to hear from me." I followed her and she spun around, her bluish grey eyes narrowing even more. "What?"

"You're right," she whispered, "I didn't."

"Spencer," I sighed a little too loud for her liking and she held up her hand.

"Don't you dare raise your voice or you'll wake the girls." Spencer looked away and quietly opened up the cupboard, grabbing coffee mugs. "What are you doing here?"

"Alexis." Sammy came into the kitchen, fully clothed. Her eyes looked a little concerned.

"Sam," I nodded and tore my eyes away from her.

"Look, what you saw..." Sammy trailed off when Carmen walked slowly into the same room, biting the side of her cheek as she kissed my sister on the forehead and grabbing something from the freezer.

"None of my business." I snorted. Carmen? Carmen Mandez of all people?

The one who spits out women like last nights leftovers, Mandez? The one who repeatedly tried to get into Spencer's pants, Mandez?

"Not now." Spencer warned me and I fought the urge to roll my eyes. "Seriously, if you wake up the girls, I will not be happy."

As opposed too...

…wait, girls?

"Dylan?" I whispered. I frowned, figuring that Ashley would've had her daughter in custody again. Right?

"Yea, Dylan and Lucas." Spencer said in a normal tone like it was most natural thing in the world.

I was jumbled up in a tangled web. I had Sammy and Carmen on my mind, I had my sister's coldness on my mind and Dylan wasn't with Ashley. I frowned and took a deep breath.

Then I saw her walk into the kitchen, brown eyes met my own and I swallowed.

Ashley?

I was about to say hi when she turned around and took off back upstairs. Spencer gave me a look and I felt defeated.

Tracey was right, I should've just went to my parents.

"It's really clear that I'm not wanted here," I zipped up my coat and felt myself be tugged back.

"_What_ did you expect?" Spencer glared at me. "A welcome home hug? A parade?"

Well, no.

"I said I was sorry," I said firmly, "I kept something big from you and from Ashley, I know this. It wasn't my place to say anything."

"And I respect that," Spencer laughed rudely, "but once Dylan was with me, you could've given me a heads up."

"But-"

"No!" Spencer hissed. "See? Alex you try and make excuses for everything you do wrong and I'm tired of it."

I hung my head.

"What happened to you?" She asked me softer that time. "Where did my little sister go?"

I lost her.

Somewhere.

"Alex, you know as far as your career is concerned, I'm proud of you. You went out and followed your dreams and I'm happy you are succeeding. Don't you ever think different," her voice was more of a whisper, "but that doesn't make me want to forgive you."

I wanted to tug at my hair because the situation was frustrating. "I'm not asking for your forgiveness," I finally said, staring at my sister, "I'm just asking you to acknowledge the fact that I get it."

"Do you?" She raised a eyebrow.

Someone cleared her throat and I caught Sammy making her way to my side. "Spence," she said calmly, "I really mean no disrespect in your own house and you are free to tell me if I'm out of line, but I really think ganging up on Alexis like this is unfair."

I blinked.

Tracey blinked.

Carmen's eyes narrowed.

And Ashley came back into the kitchen, her eyes not even looking my way. She was my best friend for years and she couldn't even look at me anymore.

Spencer's eyes shifted from mine and tilted her head towards Sammy. "How?"

"Well," Sammy smiled a little and shrugged, looking at me, "you're treating it as if it's all her fault. Don't get me wrong," she raised an eyebrow, "she can really screw things up, make mistakes and piss people off," I scowled when her attention turned back my sister _and_ Ashley, who was now listening in on the conversation, "but this is not all her doing."

I chewed on my bottom lip and closed my eyes tightly. Why was she defending me? Sammy built a great friendship with Spencer and Ashley throughout the years; I didn't want her to ruin it over me. "Sam, it's okay."

"No," Sammy insisted and stepped away from me but I caught her worried glance that she shared with Carmen and knew right then and there that something more was going on with the two, "I know Alex and I know that she can admit to things she's done wrong. And she has said that she was sorry for keeping Lucas and Dylan from the both of you, but in her defence, it wasn't her news to babble on about." Before Spencer could but in, Sammy continued talking. "I agree, once Dylan was in your care, she should've said something."

"We were best friends," Ashley finally met my eyes, "and I honestly don't want to fight about this because it's so high school-ish and we never fought in high school so why start now?" Her brown eyes flickered slightly before she looked away. "I get why I wasn't informed that Spencer had a child. I knew you thought you were protecting me, but she's your sister, she should've come first."

"I know," I whispered.

"You left me," Spencer frowned, "when I told you I was pregnant, you left me. You ran away," she said in a surprised tone, "you just took off and the next thing I know, you're telling me you're living with Ashley."

I closed my eyes and swallowed. My actions were a little childish.

"What was your reaction when Ashley said she was pregnant?" Her eyebrow rose.

I looked down and played with my fingers slightly. "She didn't sleep with anyone."

"It doesn't matter!" Spencer said and I stepped back. "I am your sister, Aly!"

//

_"Sometimes I think you two are a little young to be saying the word 'sex' let alone having it," Paula sighed and moved out of Spencer's way, who went to her own room. "We'll talk about this later, your father and I are running late." She kissed my forehead and before leaving down the stairs she hollered, "no tearing each other apart while we're gone? Wait until we can at least sit back and watch it."_

__

Har har.

"Spencer!" I ran into her room and stopped as she stopped in her own tracks, quickly pushing her music and lyrics under her pillow. "What are you doing?"

"Nothing. Go away." Spencer blew a few strands of hair out of her eyes.

"Why are you hiding your music?" I asked, stepping closer to her bed.

"Hey," she looked at me and pulled me down onto the bed, "you know that I adore you right?"

Okay. She was avoiding my question. I'd play along with it. For now.

I raised an eyebrow. "Sure?"

"I'm sorry for earlier. I can be a pain in the ass." Spencer smiled softly.

"We wouldn't be sisters if we didn't have moments like that," I confessed. I loved Spencer, she was my best friend. We both grew up fast in the past five months, growing close. Sometimes I found it hard to see that line between friend and sister with her. But she makes me proud to be her sister, even when she was an ass.

At least now she apologized.

"Why don't you like being called Aly?" Spencer finally broke the silence in her room.

My confession and reason would seem like a stupid one. One that I wasn't sure I was ready to share but Spencer asked and I couldn't lie to her. "You'll think it's stupid."

"Alex," she sighed and gave me a reassuring smile, "I promise I won't think that."

I took a deep breath and relaxed a little as Spencer folded her hands in front of her, waiting patiently. "You used to call me Aly when we were little," I looked away from her when I noticed her frown slightly, "Spency and Aly, I remember when we used to play outside together, when you'd let me play with you and Kyla." My eyes darted back to hers and a bit my bottom lip, "then when school started back up, you became a different person. You didn't acknowledge me at school and you'd tell every one I was adopted."

"Alex," She painfully frowned, realization dawning on her, "I'm-"

"Please," I interrupted her, "let me finish. Once you started to get more into hockey, you carried yourself in this confident way. You were a cool big sister. My friends liked you even though they never got to know you. They knew you because you were one of the best hockey player's on their brother or sister's team. I wanted to be you. I wanted to be that girl who got all the attention even from unknown people."

"Al-"

I threw a pillow at her and gave her a warning look to stop interrupting me. "Aly seemed too girly after awhile. You started to call me Alex and I loved it more because, I don't know, it wasn't as girly. It made me feel like you."

"Butch?" Spencer couldn't help herself and I couldn't help but roll my eyes and smirk.

"I guess," I shrugged, "Spencer's a cool name, you know? Spencer Dylan. I got Alexis Marie."

"That's because they thought I was going to be a boy," Spencer laughed. "They already had the named picked out."

"Still," I blushed, "Alex made me feel closer to you in that way. Aly was someone who you left behind. I didn't want to be her anymore and I still don't."

Spencer nodded and frowned, taking a seat next to me. "If it makes you feel any better, whoever you are or whoever you want to be, I'll always look after you and love you."

_I grinned and scratched my forehead. This was such a girly moment._

//

Nothing was that simple anymore.

Aly.

"I'm sorry." I was defeated.

Somehow the argument was spinning in a couple different directions and Carmen moved to put the coffee on that Spencer never even started to do.

"I just want everything to be okay," I finally said after a few seconds of everyone remaining silent.

"Yea well," Spencer trailed of and shrugged, "I just wish you could've trusted me enough to tell me _everything._"

"It wasn't-"

"-your place, I know." She cut me off.

"Hey," Sammy moved to Spencer and placed a hand on her shoulder, "can I just throw something out there and then maybe we should all just go our separate ways until things cool off?" She watched my sister nod before she looked at Ashley. "You two have very beautiful daughters that love each other very much. You two are amazing parents and no one is saying otherwise. I can only agree with Alex on this because I was in the same boat. I knew about Lucas and I knew about Dylan because I was friends with the both of you. Yet, I didn't say anything because it really wasn't my place."

"It's different." Ashley frowned.

"No," Sammy shook her head, "it's not; because for years, we always considered the six of us family, including Kyla and Aiden. We all stuck our necks out for each other and when things got rough, we were there to pick up pieces – without question."

Silence filled the room once again and I could see Spencer was trying to remain patient.

"You two need to wake up and see that there were other options. The fact that neither of you, at all, asked Alex to even mention the fact that your were both mothers, maybe told her she shouldn't say anything."

I looked at Sammy and felt a little honoured that she was sticking up for me. I chanced a glance back at Tracey who seemed to be nodding at every word my ex-girlfriend was saying.

"She has a point," Carmen spoke up for the first time and gave Spencer an apologetic shrug, "I mean, I'm on your side Spence, you know that. But you could've asked about Ashley, Alex may have surprised you and spilled the beans, or you could've said 'hey sis, maybe one of these days have Ashley call me if she wants'."

"I would've." Ashley whispered and Spencer turned to look at her. "I mean, I should've done the same but I think we were both wrapped up in our own lives that it never even ..." she looked at me briefly, "I'm sorry."

"Baby," Spencer sighed at Ashley and my ears twitched at the term of endearment. I struggled to figure out what exactly I was feeling at the moment.

Baby?

"Baby?" I whispered finally and frowned. Yes, I was happy deep down and I would've jumped for joy but something prevented me from doing so. "You two are together?"

"Alexis," Sammy warned quietly but I shook my head.

"She leaves you broken in high school, your heart shattered and pieces are probably still lying on that ice rink because she broke up with you. Ashley made you cry for weeks on end after she left and I was there for you, Spencer. I was there right beside Carmen, cursing Ashley's name for the fucking pain she put you through..." I had a point. Really. "She comes to town twelve years later and the moment she catches your eye, you're jumping back into a relationship with her?"

"Alex!" Spencer hissed and I shook my head.

"No, don't shut me up this time. It's my turn to speak." I felt a hand on my arm and knew it belonged to Tracey. I tried to calm down. "She broke your heart and she never made an effort to even mend things afterwards, yet I keep something that wasn't even for me to say and you're giving me the third degree? How the hell is that fair?"

"You're such a hypocrite," Spencer whispered harshly and just like my eyes, hers were showing tears forming as well, "Ashley did come back for me. She came back the day I left for Quebec and _you_ never told me. I had no clue cause if I had, I guarantee you those two girls upstairs sleeping, would be raised by the both of us. This house would've been ours and we wouldn't be fighting like this!" She took a deep breath and Ashley winced as her hand was shrugged off Spencer's shoulder. "Ashley and I have a lot to talk about. A lot to consider and we're working on it. It's not easy to look at her and not remember exactly what went on and you're right, you were there for me when I needed you, but you still walked away," her eyes darted towards the stairs where we heard movement, "I can't do this now." She finally said and pushed passed Sammy and Carmen, making her way upstairs.

I couldn't help but notice the hurt look gracing Ashley's face as she watched Spencer walk away.

Well that went over well.

**--**

**Next time in Points Underneath:**

_"Where's Tracey?"_

__

Alex stopped at the edge of the bed before sitting down and shrugging. "I think she needed to be alone, went to grab us a bite to eat."

I nodded slowly and dropped my card key on the desk and smiled when I glanced at the rose resting perfectly in the makeshift vase.

_"You and Carmen…" She started and stopped when I turned around to look at her, raising an eyebrow._


	58. Feeling The Heartache

I can say that I do own the non SoN-characters featured in the chapter! I don't own SoN though.

**46.1 - Feeling The Heartache**

**Sammy's PoV**

The Carlin house was silent after Spencer had walked away from the heated argument between her and Alex. Ashley had slowly made her way back upstairs and was dressed fully clothed, waving bye to us and taking off with a bouncy Dylan.

Alex and Tracey had left right after Spencer left the kitchen. Ryn and Tristan left as well, simply because Tristan had to work later that morning and he wanted breakfast.

I stood there in the kitchen, watching Carmen make coffee and not meeting my gaze. "Hey," I whispered and she blinked slowly, her eyes flickering to mine with a soft look, "if I upset you, I didn't mean too."

"You didn't." Carmen smiled and shrugged. "I just feel bad that this family has been ripped to shreds." I nodded and looked down at my feet. I felt her hands cup my face and she smiled. "No regrets about last night?" She had a playful grin back in place.

"No." I breathed and she moved to kiss me softly before stepping back.

"I need to make a few important phone calls and then I promised Spence I'd have lunch with her and Luc, would you like to join us?" Her grey eyes sparkled and I returned her smile, nodding. "Did you want me to drop you off at the hotel so you can change?"

"Please." I grinned and she kissed me again before running upstairs to tell Spencer we were leaving.

It took a good twenty minutes to get to the hotel I was staying at and Carmen dropped me off, saying she had to go back and talk to Spencer before getting to her phone calls. I nodded and smiled when she kissed me before I hopped out of the rented Camero and into the hotel lobby.

Thinking that maybe I could at least get some research done before heading back to New Zealand in a month's time, I quickly made my way up to my room. I stopped dead in my tracks when I noticed another raven-haired woman standing by my door. "Alex," I frowned and had a flash of déjà vu from the day before when Carmen was standing in that exact same spot.

"Hey," she waved a little unsure of herself and I opened the door to my room, allowing her to step inside.

"Where's Tracey?"

Alex stopped at the edge of the bed before sitting down and shrugging. "I think she needed to be alone, went to grab us a bite to eat."

I nodded slowly and dropped my card key on the desk and smiled when I glanced at the rose resting perfectly in the makeshift vase.

"You and Carmen…" She started and stopped when I turned around to look at her, raising an eyebrow. "I'm not jealous," she said seriously.

"Well good," I frowned a little and sat in the far chair, folding my hands in my lap and shrugging, "even if you were…"

"Sam," Alex sighed, "I'm not. I'm more concerned than anything."

"I'm a big girl." I smiled.

"But Carmen… I just… I don't like the way she treats women. What if she cheats on you?" Her eyebrow raised in concern.

"So once a cheater, always a cheater?" I raised my own eyebrow, looking at her with my head tilted. "People change."

"I'm sorry." Alex sighed heavily and rubbed her face. "I didn't come here for that. I mean, as long as you're happy and Carmen is good to you, I just… I'm sorry."

"It's okay." I remained where I was and leaned forward a bit. "So, what did you come here for?"

"Why'd you stick up for me?" She asked quietly. "You really didn't have to do that, Sam. I mean, I'm grateful you did, but what benefit do you get out of it?"

"You're one of my best friends, Alexis," I frowned slightly, "and I think I made a valid point."

"You did," Alex laughed sarcastically and shook her head, "thank you but I don't think it did any good."

"What exactly were you expecting?" I asked, standing up. "I was your girlfriend back then and even I didn't know Ashley came back for Spencer."

It was true.

"Were you in love with her?" I finally asked her. A question I had wanted to ask for the longest time but never found the nerve.

"What?" Her confused eyes stared back at me. "Who?"

"Ashley." I said softly. I wasn't upset at all. "It makes sense you know, if you wanted her to yourself…"

"Samantha!" Alex stood up abruptly and scowled. "I have never ever been in love with her."

"Then why? I mean, why all the sneaky lies? Why not tell Spencer about Ashley coming back for her? Why get upset when Spencer made a mistake and slept with a guy? Why stick by Ashley's side when she was pregnant? Why run off to B.C.?"

"You want to know why I stuck by Ashley's side during her pregnancy?" Alex remained calm. "Because I was selfish. I felt guilty for the way I was treating Spencer and wanted to right that being there for Ashley."

I blinked and frowned. "Alex, what?"

"I know! It was stupid and selfish reason. I- I can't help it Sammy. All of these situations get so sticky and I don't know how to get myself out of them other than bailing. Music has been my escape literally and it's just not right." I saw the sorrow in her eyes but I didn't feel any other emotion.

"I really don't know what to say." I whispered. "This is all between you three now, but you really need to patch things up with your sister first." I stressed. "You screwed her over, Alexis, big time. I don't blame her for being so angry."

Alex just stood there and stared at me. Her fists clenched a little before she licked her lips. "Am I really that horrible?"

"You've changed. You used to be the girl everyone would run to with their problems. You were the first one to try everything in your willpower to fix it and now? You're the woman everyone is trying to run from and your willpower sucks because you do not want to fix things the right way." I sighed softly and moved to pat her on the shoulder. "I'm not here to dig you out of this. That ship had sailed a long time ago and I said what I had to say this morning. This is up to you."

Alex's grey eyes darkened with sadness and she nodded, closing them before bowing her head and turning around.

I sighed heavily and realized my mood for working on the research was put off. Instead, I opted for a hot shower instead.

**--**

**Lucas' PoV**

I scanned the café and then frowned as my mother looked past my shoulder, staring out at the gloomy cold day. I picked at my salad and then bit my lip, not sure if I should bring up the fact that I heard yelling earlier that morning. Mom seemed more upset than usual and I didn't even get a chance to have breakfast with Dylan, since Ashley had plans already.

"Are you not hungry?" Her voice was light as if she were trying to hide her sorrow from me. It didn't work though, but I never let her know that.

"It's good, just waiting for Aunt Carm." I shrugged and bit into a crisp carrot, sighing as her eyes went back out towards the window. "Mom?" I finally sighed and she frowned in concern.

"What's wrong Luc?"

"I was going to ask you the same thing." I raised an eyebrow and put down my fork. I could act childish sometimes because I was a kid still, but I was raised smart. Most of my teachers wanted me to skip a grade, but I'd miss my friends too much – and everyone said for an eleven year old, I was too young to pick up on others moods.

"Lucas Evelyn, what do you mean?" Finally her eyes twitched into a playful gaze and it made me happy. "I've just had a rough morning."

"Oh," I frowned, "did you and Ashley get in a fight?"

My mom's eyes widened and quickly shook her head. "No no baby, nothing like that," she studied me for a moment and then closed her eyes, "your Aunt Alex is back in town."

Oh.

It didn't surprise me so much that there was arguing then. I was too young to know exactly what was going on, but I did know enough to understand that my mom wasn't very happy – and probably with good reason.

"Lucas," she whispered and I looked up at her, "I wouldn't worry about it okay?"

"Are you going to kick her out of town?" I asked, frowning. Mom smiled and shook her head 'no'. "Is Ashley?"

"No, Alex isn't going anywhere."

"Okay." I nodded and then we heard the bell sound from the front doors. A burst of cold wind came in and I turned to find Aunt Carmen and Sammy laughing while holding hands. I grinned. "Lovers!"

"Lucas!" My mom hissed at me and I just shrugged.

"Well where's your lover? Not working?" Aunt Carmen patted my head with her cold hand and I smacked it away. "Feisty little one, ain't she?"

I hated when she'd do that!

"Don't mind her," Sammy smiled and leaned forward to kiss my cheek, "she's just grumpy because she slipped and fell where there was no ice patch."

I chuckled and Carmen threw her a warning look and shook her head.

That shut her up.

I could feel the uncomfortable feeling that started to surround us. I quickly ate my salad while the 'grown ups' talked quietly amongst themselves, stopping every so often to see if I was paying attention. I was practically invisible and for a kid who liked to be the center of attention, I was happy to not be at that point.

I never wanted to grow up.

Maybe to kiss Jaiden…

Not sure on that one yet.

I frowned when I noticed the sad look on my mother's face and grabbed my shoulder bag. "Mom?" I said quietly, careful not to interrupt. She smiled at me and waited for me to continue. "Could I go and draw a little over there?" I pointed towards an empty sofa by the black piano.

"Sure baby," she smiled and kissed my forehead when I moved to get out of the booth.

I heard them resume talking and I made myself comfortable on the loveseat, digging out my sketchpad and pencil. Some kids made fun of me at school because I was picky with the pencils I'd use. They didn't know the difference, but I did and that was what mattered.

I was so engrossed in my drawing that I never even heard someone sit down beside me. It wasn't until I felt a hand on my shoulder, making me jump and a deep scribble smeared across the paper in the process. I was about to say something not so nice when I swung my head in their direction but the words fell when I noticed a pair of blue eyes stare curiously over my shoulder. "Hadley!"

"Lucas." Her grin was fascinating as her blonde curls fell passed her shoulders while she tilted her head and pointed to my sketch. "Do you ever stop drawing?"

I blushed and closed my sketchpad slowly, not daring to look in her eyes.

"Well," her hand patted my shoulder, "I think it's cute."

"Cute?" I giggled. Just like my Aunt Carmen and mom, I didn't do cute.

"Okay," Hadley shifted and looked out the window across the street, the snow falling miserably, "I find it," her eyebrows scrunched in a cute way, "adorable?"

I melted.

"You're cute." I shoved her lightly with my shoulder and she erupted into giggles, reaching over to grab my sketchpad.

"May I?"

I swallowed hard. My sketchpad was just like any other girls journal – in fact it was more personal than my own journal. But somehow I couldn't say no. "Uh, sure."

Hadley placed the book into her lap and I watched as she scanned each picture with her blue eyes, her long eyelashes flickering every so often. "You drew these?" She whispered in an amazed tone.

"Yeah." I shrugged.

"Wow," she breathed and looked at me with a soft smile, "is this of me?"

Crap.

Bad word.

I could only nod. "You were the only interesting thing in that room."

I think she blushed and bit her lip. "My Aunt Tori is in town and she's taking me to the movies, did you want to come?"

"Oh." I felt my heart do a lurch thingy again and my palms started to sweat slightly. "Um…"

"Dylan can join us too if that's what you're worried about." Hadley whispered.

"Dyl's with her mom." I smiled and she smiled back. "I'll have to ask my mom…"

"Already on it kid." I turned around to find a tall brunette standing there with a grin that matched Hadley's. "Your mom said it was cool, just leave your bag with her. I'll drop you off at home on our way to Sunnyside."

Hadley squealed and I jumped up just as excitedly, leaving them to wait by the door. I found myself hugging my mom and whispering 'thank you' in her ear.

"You're welcome." She laughed and made sure my hat and gloves were on before stepping outside.

It was official, my mom was the coolest.

**--**

**Next time in Points Underneath:**

_"Spencer." Her voice broke the silence that I wasn't even aware of. I blinked and looked at her, she looked so broken and lost and for the first time I had no clue why._

__

"Ash, what's wrong?" I frowned in concern.

_"What would've happened if Alex told you I came back?" She whispered._


	59. Room For The Carlins?

_So now that we have most of the Alex drama away (for now), let's try out hands at a little fluff within the next couple of chapters. Not to mention Jaiden's run in the with school's shy girl... yea, you wanna keep reading. Enjoy!!_

**46.2 - Room For The Carlins?**

**Ashley's PoV**

"How can you eat those?" I asked Dylan as she ate a couple of fries with salt and vinegar piled on them.

"Mommy," she sighed with a soft eye roll and grin, "Kenora is famous for these fries!"

"But they are very unhealthy." I smirked and she just shrugged, eating a couple more. We finally pulled up to a small blue house that had an extended garage attached to it. I looked passed the place and could vaguely make out Spencer's house. I closed my eyes and pushed away all the bad things that were said earlier that morning – not wanting to dwell on them while I shared time with my daughter.

"Just the salt is bad for you," Dylan interrupted my thoughts, "the vinegar is good for you in small doses." She shrugged as if it were regular news to her.

I stared at her and smirked. "And what makes you so sure?"

Dylan bit into a fry, chewed and swallowed before talking again. "When Spencer first gave me these fries I told her you'd be a little upset because it wasn't healthy. She said 'honey, the only thing that's bad is the salt and grease, the vinegar actually helps your system.'"

I had to chuckle. _Spencer._

Dylan was right, I wouldn't have approved of all that but she insisted they were good and it was what she wanted so I allowed her to have the small size. "Are you enjoying them at least?"

"Muchly." Dylan grinned and finished the rest, wiping her hands with a napkin. Her eyes could barely see from over the dashboard but she noticed the house and with a confused look, she stared at me. "What is this?"

"This," I pointed to the place and opened my door, gesturing for her to do the same, "is our new home."

Dylan's eyes widened as she quickly ran through the snow and onto the small deck area, looking across the lake. "That's Lucas'!"

"I know." I grinned and grabbed the key from under the snow covered flower pot. "Want to see inside?"

Dylan hopped off the deck and followed me eagerly as I pushed the front door opened. I had already taken a look at it and approved. I still wanted the place checked for any issues it may have had but I had the money to clean damage up. I wasn't concerned at all.

Just for my family's safety.

"Wow!" Dylan grinned as the living room had a big picture view window that looked out towards the lake. "Where's my room?" She asked bouncing around.

"Well you have three rooms to choose from." I pointed down the wide hallway and smiled as she clapped her hands.

"Three?"

"Of course, the prettiest girls always get first choice." I chuckled and Dylan ran down the hall, scoping out each room, the closets and finally she settled on the middle room with the medium sized closet.

"This is perfect to fit my hockey gear in." Dylan opened up the closet doors and walked in slightly. "I love it." She nodded, confirming it.

"Good." I nodded. "Now let's pick my room."

Dylan dragged me to the furthest room and nodded. "This will do," she grinned with her little dimples and scrunched her nose in a crinkled smile, "if I remember correctly, you have lotsa shoes and clothes you don't know what to do with."

I shook my head and wondered briefly how she got to be so smart; not that she wasn't before but it was just a reminder of the time I had lost with her. Then knowing that she was in Spencer's care made it make sense to me, Lucas was the top of her class just like Spencer had been throughout school.

"That's where you're wrong," I tackled her and she giggled, both of us falling to the freshly shampooed carpet, "we need a day to go shopping together so we both can fill up our closets."

"Really?" She looked surprised and I nodded. "Can we go to the city? That's where Spencer takes Lucas to get school clothes!"

I licked my lips and kissed her forehead. "Of course, baby. Anywhere you wanna go."

"Mommy, what's the other room going to be for?" Dylan asked, her eyebrows rising to her hairline.

I shrugged, getting up off the floor and dragging her with me. "I'm not sure, actually. We could put a computer in there maybe?"

Dylan had a pensive look on her face before she licked her own lips and cleared her throat. "Can, I mean, do you think Lucas can have that room?"

If I would've thought about that idea, I would've brought her along too. Wow, I should've thought about that. I had no issues with it whatsoever. Lucas was welcomed into our home whenever she wanted and that went for Spencer as well. My door was opened to both blondes that had made heavier impressions on my heart and in our lives.

"I think," I knelt down and straightened out her winter coat collar, "that's the best idea I've heard all day."

Dylan looked like she had just won the lottery with the widened eyes and happy smile that graced her face. "I can't wait to tell her!"

I grinned and grabbed her hand. We checked out the rest of place and we made a decision that the basement would be used for any other big gatherings. I figured I could put a pool table down there along with a mini bar – alcohol free of course. It was huge down there and Dylan was having fun planning a potential Christmas party she wanted to throw for her friends.

She sounded like she was nine going on fifteen.

Over an hour went by and I promised Spencer I'd have her back in time for them to get ready for Dylan's hockey practice. "Come on babe," I shooed her out the door and locked it, "I can't believe it's already getting dark."

"I know." Dylan frowned as the sun started to disappear behind the trees. "Can I spend tonight with you?"

I looked at Dylan and smiled softly. "Of course, baby. I have a job interview tomorrow morning so you'll be getting to school early."

"That's okay." Dylan grinned and bit her lip. "Mrs. Wise is always there because some kids live far away and come in on an earlier bus."

"If you're sure…" I pressed while driving towards Spencer's house.

"Mommy," Dylan giggled, "I'm sure!"

"Okay." I nodded and reached to grab her gloved hand. "Tonight it's a Davies girls night."

**--**

**Spencer's PoV**

"Homework done?" I called upstairs where Lucas and Hadley were giggling about something.

"Yes!" Lucas stopped laughing long enough to answer me before going back to whatever the girls were doing.

"I really appreciate you taking Hadley, Miss Carlin." Tori sighed worriedly. "I didn't think I'd be called back so soon and my sister isn't back from the city yet."

I waved her off with a soft smile. "She's been a delight," I assured her, "and listen to them, I doubt there's any complaints."

Tori laughed and nodded, tugging on her heavy coat, blowing hair out of her face. The front door opened and Dylan came running in, nearly knocking over the tall brunette teenager. "Where's the fire?" Tori chuckled softly and Dylan looked at her sheepishly.

"Sorry."

"Dylan, you forgot-" Ashley stopped at the door.

Our eyes locked immediately and I felt my heart do that lurchy thing. We exchanged shy smiles and then our gaze went back to Tori and Dylan.

"Hadley!" Tori called and not even two seconds later, the blonde came down and gave her Aunt a kiss on the cheek. "You be on your best behaviour, kay? Mind your manners and I'll be back in town tomorrow for sure."

"Be safe." Hadley smiled and ran back upstairs, but not before dragging Dylan with her. "Dyl Pickle's back!"

"Hey!" Dylan's giggle could be heard echoing the place.

"Thank you again," Tori smiled gratefully and stepped aside from Ashley, "I'll give you a call as soon as I hear from my sister."

"Don't worry about it," I smiled back, "Hadley's more than welcome to spend the night if need be. I'll make sure she's got everything for school."

"Jaiden has always said you were the best." Tori laughed and waved as she rushed out the door. She worked forty-five minutes away in a smaller place as a nurse assistant. She was on call a lot.

Then there were two.

"Make yourself at home." I said softly and stepped forward, my hands finding their way to Ashley's scarf, gently tugging it off. My fingers then found the buttons to her coat, slipping them through the holes one by one, while holding her gaze. "How was your day?"

"My morning was eventful," Ashley whispered, her brown eyes flickering with some sadness, "however, my day with Dylan was amazing."

I smiled softly and nodded. "Good, you two need time together."

"She's staying with me tonight." Ashley bit her lips, as if she was almost afraid that I'd protest.

"I'll be sure to pack extra clothes." I nodded, not affected by her plans. I meant what I said to her, she didn't need to ask my permission to take Dylan at any given time. I was doing her a favour now by just taking care of Dylan. Ashley had true custody and was free to walk away from all this with her daughter in hand if she pleased.

"Spencer." Her voice broke the silence that I wasn't even aware of. I blinked and looked at her, she looked so broken and lost and for the first time I had no clue why.

"Ash, what's wrong?" I frowned in concern.

"What would've happened if Alex told you I came back?" She whispered.

I felt my heart beating harder because I knew the intense talks weren't over yet. Which was okay because they needed to be done.

"I would've chased you." I said seriously after picturing it in my head.

I would've gotten a phone call from Alex telling me that Ashley was standing on our doorstep. I would've forced Carmen to turn around. I would've taken Ashley back in my arms and kiss her like there was no tomorrow and then beat her ass figuratively for scaring like she did in the first place. We'd cry and then she'd drop to her knees and propose yet again. I'd follow her to B.C. or she'd come with me to York. We'd marry shortly after and live our lives together before having little Lucas and Dylan.

But that didn't happen.

Alex never told me about Ashley coming to see me. Ashley left for B.C. while I went to summer hockey camp and then college, slept with a stranger and nine months later had my beautiful daughter. Ashley pursued her career by writing and composing for my sister's albums and then two years later, she had her own beautiful little girl.

I inhaled as I realized just how badly _I_ wanted to break down. "Where did we go so wrong?" I asked, stepping back from Ashley. "God, what happened back then that caused all of this?"

Ashley looked down and swallowed. I didn't even think about the girls upstairs before starting the conversation. My heart just needed more answers. Something.

I needed someone to tell me where _I_ went wrong to have been abandoned by the two people who I trusted and loved the most.

"Ashley," I whispered in a desperate plea, "did I do anything?"

"No!" She looked horrified. "Spencer, no. No. You," she paused and closed her eyes, "you were perfect."

I didn't want to touch anymore of that subject with her. I didn't want to open those wounds again because I got part of it.

"This morning," Ashley's voice cracked and it alarmed me, "you did say that when you looked at me…"

Fuck.

I sighed heavily, pressing my cheek against hers as I pulled her close to me. "I didn't mean it like that," I whispered honestly, "I just meant that yes, a part of me still hurts but that's what makes this real. I wanted Alex to know that we didn't just jump into anything."

"Spence," Ashley looked at me, "we kind of did. I mean, I just got here not even a month ago and we've slept together…"

"It doesn't matter," I whispered, "with _us_ there is no _right_ moment to be together. We just _are._" I realized what I had just said and so did she, stepping back slightly to gaze at me.

"Together?"

I smiled and blushed a little, swallowing. "Well I was hoping we could maybe, you know, go on a date."

"Wow," Ashley broke out into laughter; a laugh that I hadn't heard in years and she just looked at me, her shoulders shaking because she was laughing so hard.

Wow indeed.

See if I asked her out on a date again.

Psh.

"You've been spending way too much time with Carmen." She finally calmed down. "I know the Carlin charm consists of more then that."

Oh, so she wanted to play it that way.

"Fine," I shrugged and bumped my hip with hers as I walked past to grab a couple of water bottles from the fridge, packing them for the girls' practice, "I guess my Tuesday night just opened up. And you know, I do have a few admirers around here that'd love to have my company…"

"You wouldn't." Ashley's eyes narrowed and I knew she was thinking about Aimee. Hot blonde. Lethal. But not as lethal as the _fucking_ hot brunette standing in the middle of my kitchen with her hands on her hips and eyebrow raised in question.

"Wouldn't I? I mean, the brunette I _wanted_ to see just shot my technique down and gave me a complex." I pouted and Ashley rolled her eyes with a grin. "Davies," I stepped closer to her, my fingertips meeting the exposed skin of her neck drawing little patterns lightly, "I've been thinking," I whispered and moved forward, forcing her to take a step back, our eyes never leaving the other, "I really want to treat you to a nice dinner. I want to get to know you better. I want to spend time with you." I finally had her trapped between myself and the breakfast island. "Please, honour me by accompanying me Tuesday evening?"

Ashley was holding her breath, a pink colour tinted her cheeks as she swallowed and licked her lips.

Carlin charm still worked!

"Please?" I whispered hotly against her lips, my darkened blue eyes flickering from her dark brown and down to her all-too tempting mouth.

Ashley's hands thrust in my hair and she kissed me passionately. I moaned and pressed her harder into the island, my hands finding her hips and holding us steady. Tongues greeted gracefully and mouths moved gently.

The kiss ended and we were both breathing heavily, eyes full of lust and skin that seemed even more sensitive. "Every time I look at you," Ashley said huskily, "I fall that much deeper."

Was that code for 'yes'?

I wanted to cry – but for a good reason. I wanted to scream that I was falling that much deeper too.

"I've never stopped." I whispered and captured her lips in a slow brief kiss. God, I wanted her all over again.

I needed to feel her again.

"Stay tonight?" I asked, stepping away as we heard footsteps running down the stairs.

"I promised Dylan." Ashley whispered, frowning.

I grinned and nodded, understanding. I was being selfish. "Will I see you tomorrow?" I felt like I was in high school all over again. You know, eager to see my boyfriend's hot cousin whenever I had the chance.

"You can count on it." Ashley nodded and we turned our heads just in time to see Dylan and Lucas tugging on their coats and grabbing their hockey gear from the hallway closet.

"Come on Coach!" Lucas pointed to the clock. "We're going to be late. Time is money!"

"Yea!" Dylan followed Lucas and Hadley outside.

Ashley smirked and tucked some hair behind my ear. "Better get a move on it Coach. You've got to set examples that need to be followed and being tardy is not one of them." She winked and grabbed the bag I was packing, smacked my ass and went to pull her own coat and boots on.

I closed my eyes and smiled, whispering to myself, "I've so just sealed the deal with Tuesday night."

**--**

**Next time in Points Underneath:**

_"Good morning, Ryn." I smiled as I passed her in the lobby of my work._

__

"Whoa," Ryn stopped me with a grin, "did you get laid last night?"

Unfortunately, no.

"Nope," I shook my head.

I was just happy.

_"Wow," the redhead chuckled and had a pleased smile on her face, "you're walking on cloud nine."_


	60. Family Under Construction

_Second update of the day! Woo and hoo! Enjoy!_

_This is for _**seeaetee77.** _Just because you're awesome!_

**47 - Family Under Construction**

**Dylan's PoV**

"So when can we move into our new house?" I asked, sitting on the edge of the hotel bed, watching my mom unpack a few more clothing items of mine and stuffing them in the drawers of the dresser.

"Next week," she turned to me with a smile and threw herself on the bed, grabbing me and tickling me. She stopped and I placed my head on her shoulder, my hand gripping the material of her jersey. It had Spencer's name on the back. "Did you finish your homework or was I a bad mom and distract you?"

I grinned and sat up, running to grab my school bag. "I finished it on Friday before dinner."

My mom took the small book I handed her and looked at me curiously. "What is this?"

"My homework!" I stressed with a laugh. "I was supposed to write about something happy."

I wrote about her return and how happy I was that she was going to stay in Kenora. I also wrote that I wanted Spencer to be my other mom.

I was hoping I wouldn't get into trouble.

"Mommy?" I frowned with a whisper when I noticed tears well up in her eyes. "Was that bad?"

"No baby!" She quickly wiped her tears away, a smiling brightening her face back up. "You are just the perfect daughter, you know that?"

Girly moment.

We used to have them a lot, followed by ice cream and movies and...

"Do you have your guitar?" I asked, tucking the notebook I gave her to look at, back in my bag.

My mom gave me a soft look, hesitating, before nodding and going towards the closet door. There it was. Her favourite guitar. The one she'd write songs with all the time. "What would you like to hear?" She asked, grabbing her pick thingy and tuning the instrument.

"Uh," I tapped my fingers against my chin before I smiled widely, "you and Spencer used to be girlfriends, did you ever write her any love songs?"

"Dyl," her sigh was almost painful but it didn't stop her from playing a few notes and her eyes never leaving mine, "so if I play this for you, will you tell me a secret about yourself?"

I giggled and nodded. She smiled and winked.

I loved getting told that I looked a lot like my mom.

She was the most beautiful lady in the world.

_"Blue was never my favourite colour  
But on you girl, it seems so right  
To look into those orbs  
To breathe your name  
There isn't an obstacle I will not fight  
To have you with me  
To always hear your smile  
Telling me to stay for  
- awhile_

_Sometimes I wish she could fly me away  
Back to yesterday  
Where she first smiled at me  
When I told her she was crazy…"_

Wow. I missed my mommy's voice! She wrote that song for Spencer. "That's beautiful mommy." I whispered and she smiled, placing her guitar down.

"Did you know Spencer wrote the music for it?" She asked me and nodded as I shook my head. "I just put words to it. She's quite the music writer."

"Like her sister?" I asked. Alex was the coolest. I sensed a lot of bad feelings between all the adults but I didn't stick my nose into it.

"Just like Alex, yes." My mom seemed to carry a genuine smile while saying her name, that much I noticed. "So, your turn." She scooted back on the bed and I sat in front of her. She immediately grabbed the brush and started to brush my hair free from tangles. I showered as soon as we got back to the room after hockey practice. I felt her weaving her fingers through my hair as I thought about a secret to tell her.

"I don't like girls." I shrugged. I was raised to know that it didn't matter who you loved just as long as you were happy. I don't ever remember my mom being happy with anyone. I didn't really remember much before I was taken away. Spencer thought it was because I subconsciously tried to block everything out to forget the bad. She said that the older I get, I may start to remember things here and there. I was already starting to remember the little things my mom and I used to do.

My mom giggled and wrapped her arms around me, resting her chin on my shoulder, kissing my cheek. "And that's okay." She whispered.

"Are you sure?" I raised an eyebrow and turned to face her on the bed with a slight chuckle. "Ephiny, Chase, Jaiden, Sammy, Carmen, Spencer, Lucas, Alex and you all like girls. Does that make me weird?"

"Baby," she sighed and pulled my hand into hers, "I think because this is such a small town, everyone kind of sticks to their 'own crowd'. Ryn and Tristan are a couple and they aren't weird. Who you like does not define who you are." Her brown eyes made me feel safe. They made me believe her. "When you're old enough to get a boyfriend, as long as he treats you with respect and you're happy, I won't mind."

I blushed at the thought of having a boyfriend. I was only nine but Lucas told me she had a crush on Jaiden since she was seven. I liked Jason.

"So you don't think I'm weird?" I asked again.

"No," she smiled and shook her head, "never Baby Dyl."

I grinned and scooted close to her. Her arms wrapped around me once again and for the first time in over a year or so, I fell asleep right away in her arms.

**--**

**Spencer's PoV**

"Good morning, Ryn." I smiled as I passed her in the lobby of my work.

"Whoa," Ryn stopped me with a grin, "did you get laid last night?"

Unfortunately, no.

"Nope," I shook my head.

I was just happy.

"Wow," the redhead chuckled and had a pleased smile on her face, "you're walking on cloud nine."

I was in love.

"I'm just happy." I nodded and checked the computer for any unexpected meetings that may have popped up. "Dylan and Ashley spent their first night together since over a year and half ago."

Ryn nodded and slid into her office chair. "So she's serious about staying." I glanced at her and she was still wearing that pleased smile.

"Yea," I breathed wistfully and shushed Ryn while she made 'cooing' noises. "She has an interview with Beaver Brae high school this morning. Unfortunately, I was a little late dropping Luc off at school so I missed her before wishing her good luck and then I realized I don't even have her cell number, can you believe that?"

Because I couldn't.

I shook my head as the smile fell from my face. What if she wanted to hear me say 'good luck babe'? I was sure she'd understand but still!

"Chill," Ryn laughed a little, "any news she receives, you know she'll be sharing with you first."

"I know." I smiled again and started to make my way back towards my office.

"Oh, Mr. Carlin called earlier. I told him you wouldn't be in until after lunch." Her green eyes shifted a little and bit her lip. "I wasn't sure…"

"Thanks." I nodded and proceeded to my office. Upon opening the door, I noticed her sitting in my chair, her hair pulled back and her eyes looking so tired. "Hey," I whispered, all of a sudden feeling drained of energy before I even had time to get worked up.

"I gotta stop this, don't I?" Alex smiled a little. "Showing up unannounced that is."

"Yea, you do." I sighed and took a seat across from her, placing my phone on hold so I wouldn't get any calls coming in. "So what do I owe this pleasure of seeing you this morning? And please don't apologize again, Alex. The meaning is wearing a little thin with you."

Her eyes widened but she nodded. "I thought about this a lot," she stood up and moved towards the window. The morning was filled with sunshine but the air was cold and crispy. Snow glared back at her as she squinted her eyes and looked back at me, "I didn't come here to start another argument; I just really wanted to ask you if we could talk later. I figured calling you would get me hung up on so I took a chance and just… came here."

I stood up as well and sighed heavily. "I'm not happy with you," I made eye contact, "and I don't owe you anything. Please just give me the time I need to calm down and then we can talk."

Alex nodded and moved to pass me, grabbing the doorknob. "Call me."

I closed my eyes and tried to still the sudden adrenaline running through me. "Alex," I said her name in almost a whisper and we faced each other, "I think in the meantime you should go visit mom and dad."

It broke me inside to see her face shatter but she nodded yet again, not making a sound. I watched her walk fast down the hallway where Ryn stared at me. Her look told me she had no clue Alex was in my office.

I needed the day to go by quick. And I wasn't looking forward to the phone call with my father.

I threw myself into my case files and set up parental meetings with follow-ups during the morning. A phone call never came from my dad like I had expected so I was guessing Alex had called him up and he changed his mind. He knew not to mess with me if I was in an undecided mood.

By the time I glanced up at the clock, I noticed it was nearing three in the afternoon. A knock at my door alarmed me that I was going to be running late to pick up the girls from school. "It's open!" I said in a rushed voice, shutting down my work computer and then throwing a few files into my briefcase that I planned on working on from home.

"Your three o'clock is here." Ryn grinned as she poked her head through the door.

Three o'clock?! What?! No!

"Ryn, I never made an appointment, you know I need to pick up my girls-" the sentence died when the redhead opened the door wider and I found three figures staring at me from the other side of the doorway.

My girls.

All three of them.

"How'd your interview go?" I asked excitedly. Aside from kissing her, I wanted to ask all day her how her interview went. I couldn't kiss her of course.

Damn responsible adult responsibilities.

"Good." Ashley nodded and smiled, but didn't provide any more information. "I got a phone call from the girls' school, they couldn't get a hold of you and well, it was early dismissal day at two."

I slapped my forehead. "Shit." I whispered and opened my eyes to find all three ladies with their hands open, waiting for their 'bad word' money. I eyed up Ashley with a grin. "You do not qualify in the money getting," I wagged my finger at her and she pouted.

"Why not?"

Lucas and Dylan giggled and took off down the hall after I gave them each a dollar coin.

"Because," I smirked and reached to grab her hand, "you love using the bad words."

In bed.

Beneath me or over me.

"I do?" Her smirk was anything but innocent and I nodded. "Enlighten me." She challenged and leaned against the doorframe seductively. Ryn cleared her throat and chased after the girls quickly.

"Oh I will," I nodded seriously and closed the door quickly, pushing her up against it, "tomorrow night on our date." I whispered, my nose dragging lightly along her cool neck. I could smell the freshness of the cold air everywhere on her. I loved it.

"Promise?" Ashley's husky voice whispered. I smiled and captured her lips in a soft kiss, my hands greeting her lithe hips, squeezing gently. The simple contact caused her body to tremble and I had to admit that it made me feel pretty damn good to still have that affect on her. "What are you doing?" She licked her lips in a hushed tone as I pressed her against the door a little harder with my own body.

"Thanking you." I mumbled between kisses, letting out a breathy sigh when her hands ran through my hair and cupped the back of my neck.

"For?" She gasped, pulling back, her eyes darker and a little out of breath herself.

"Picking up the girls." I smiled softly and ran my thumb gently over her plush swollen lips. She kissed the tip and grinned almost shyly. "Thank you."

"I didn't mind." Ashley played with the fine hairs on the back of my neck, her eyelids drooping lustfully at me. "If I get paid for it in kisses, I'll be on pick up duty every day from now on."

I chuckled and she broke out into a brilliant smile, crinkling her nose. "Oh you get these no matter what." I said a little more seriously and moved in to kiss her again. I pulled back when I heard small footsteps coming back. I kissed her one last time and moved her to open the door, finding Dylan and Lucas tapping their watches.

"How the hell do you do that?" Ashley whispered as I grabbed my briefcase and shooed the girls out towards the lobby.

"Do what?" I asked with a raised eyebrow.

"You could be in the heaviest make out session of your life and hear footsteps." Ashley looked at me like I was crazy and I couldn't help but laugh. "It's funny?"

"Kind of." I looped my arm through hers while grabbing my coat from the hook.

"Years of practice?" She raised an eyebrow, looking at me with that familiar sideways glance.

Ah, welcome home Ashley Jealous Davies.

"Actually," I stopped us in the hallway, making sure the girls were not around. I figured Ryn captured them and kept them occupied. "I've never brought that around Lucas. I guess you could just call it intuition or something. A mother's instinct."

"You never brought anyone home for Lucas to meet?" She asked me in a tone that suggested to me she didn't believe what I had said.

"No." I frowned. "Lucas can get really attached and like you already know, I wasn't exactly with just one person." Wow Spence, could you have made yourself sound more sluttish? "I just meant that I wasn't one for commitment, I didn't have the time nor the patience and I really didn't want-"

"Carlin," her voice came out so soft and fingers were pressed against my lips gently. Her eyes held a sense of understanding in them and she smiled. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to bring it up like that."

"Katie was my last girlfriend and even she didn't spend that much time with Luc." I whispered. "But you? You are the only one who's seen the inside of us. You're the only one who gets to see me break down and cry. You're the only one who gets to experience a Carlin ritual of going for ice cream on one of the coldest days of the year. And," I breathed, "you're the only one I want to share everything with."

"Spencer." She breathed and rested her forehead against mine. She was about to kiss me when I pushed away and swallowed. I waited for her to catch on and let me go and just as she did, the girls were running back down towards us.

"God you old people!" Lucas' hands flew up in the air. "My ice cream is going to start melting by the time we get out of here!"

"Cool your jets, Luc," I smirked and ruffled her long blonde hair.

Her grey eyes danced and she grinned, "Jaiden wouldn't let my ice cream melt."

"You think you'll see Hadley?" Dylan asked, her brown eyes glowing just like her mother's when happy.

"I don't know." Lucas shrugged and smiled. "I hope so."

"Me too." Dylan laced her fingers with Lucas' and they walked ahead of us, out into the brisk cold.

"You know," Ashley smiled as we followed the girls outside, sunglasses instantly perched on her faces because of the blinding sun, "you really did a good job raising Lucas, Spence."

I blushed a little and licked my lips. "Yea, the moment I laid eyes on her wide grey eyes, I knew she was a keeper and I was a goner."

"I can see why," Ashley admitted politely and quickly squeezed my hand, "so meet you at Rapture?"

"I'm riding with Ash!" Lucas yelled from the side of her mustang. "Shot-gun!"

"Shot-gun in Spencer's car!" Dylan let go of Lucas' hand and ran to me, grabbing mine firmly.

"Last one there buys." Ashley chuckled as Lucas hopped in the front seat, doing up her seatbelt.

"Hmm," I pulled Ashley into a hug, "better have your wallet ready babe," I whispered into her ear.

She swallowed and ran to her side of her car and let the engine roar.

I grinned as Lucas waved to us and Ashley was carefully making her way out of the parking lot.

Dylan smirked at me, her eyes twinkling. "You're so taking the shortcut aren't you?"

I winked at her and opened her passenger side door.

There was no shortcut.

I'd buy regardless.

It was a Carlin tradition.

For me and my three girls.

**--**

**Next time in Points Underneath:**

_"Sorry," I laughed softly and shook my head, "I zoned."_

__

"Huh," her grey eyes studied me and she raised an eyebrow, "do that a lot?"

I shrugged with a grin.

"So that's where Dylan gets it from." Lucas chuckled and took a sip of her strawberry milkshake. "So mom said you two were going out tonight."

_"We are." I nodded and I tried my best to hide the kiddish smile that wanted to creep up on my face._


	61. Picture Perfect

**48.1 - Picture Perfect**

**Ashley's PoV**

Spencer had asked me how my interview went with the school and I had bravely left out every detail by changing the subject.

Truth was, I wasn't sure how my interview went at that point. The Principal and the school board seemed interested enough. I had Grammy awards under my belt for best writer, composer and instrumentalist. I had dozens of others as well as high musical education. But that didn't matter at the end of the day, what mattered was what sort of creativity and music I could bring to the high school students.

They had me do a few tests while there and even though I knew I passed them, I was still on edge. Getting the job was a huge deal to me. I wanted it.

I didn't need it, but I wanted it.

I had just gotten off the phone with the head guru.

I got the job and I was to start the next day.

It was exciting for me to have things start to piece together after living a life I loathed for over a year and a half. It felt like I could really move on and just be on my own with my daughter and hopefully build things back up with Spencer and Lucas.

"Earth to Ashley Davies!" I looked over to find Lucas waving a fry in my face. "Where'd you go?"

Tuesday afternoon and I was on 'pick up' duty with the girls. Dylan was by the grand piano in Rapture, waiting for Spencer. It seemed that for the last couple of days, Spencer and I had switched little partners.

"Sorry," I laughed softly and shook my head, "I zoned."

"Huh," her grey eyes studied me and she raised an eyebrow, "do that a lot?"

I shrugged with a grin.

"So that's where Dylan gets it from." Lucas chuckled and took a sip of her strawberry milkshake. "So mom said you two were going out tonight."

"We are." I nodded and I tried my best to hide the kiddish smile that wanted to creep up on my face.

"Where too?" Her grin didn't help me any and I had to smile that kiddish smile. "Ou, are you blushing?"

The thing about Lucas Carlin is that she was just like her mother. She had that non-serious side to her yet she could really hold an adult conversation.

"You are not allowed to know that." I narrowed my eyes playfully and Lucas giggled, pulling out her sketch book.

"Can I show you something?" She asked, her voice immediately going quiet. I nodded and she took a deep breath. "I showed this to my teacher and he suggested that I take up art class next year or join art club after Christmas." She opened her book and skimmed through half of it before landing on the picture she wanted to share with me. Wow.

One word for you.

Fucking talented.

"I couldn't figure out the shading but I tried." Lucas blushed and shrugged as I stared intently at the beautiful pencil marks that put the word 'perfection' to shame. It was a sketch of me playing the piano. How did she get that picture? "Mom has a bunch of pictures locked away from her younger days," she said quickly as if she were reading my mind, "she doesn't know I took it so please don't tell her?"

"Wow Lucas," I breathed in awe, not caring about the subject of her drawing but the actual talent behind it, "this is absolutely beautiful and amazing."

"Oh." Lucas blushed even redder and put her eyes down towards the table. "You're not mad that I drew you?"

"No." I shook my head and gave her a soft smile. "I'm actually flattered."

"Really?" Her ears perked up and I nodded. "Thank you."

"Well for what it's worth," I closed her book and slid it back to her, "you really should join art club."

Lucas grinned. "I think I will then."

"Spencer's here!" Dylan came running to our booth and squealed before running back towards the door.

"Why did you pick us up from school anyway? Not that I mind," Lucas chuckled, "your mustang is pretty sweet."

I laughed and shrugged. "Your mom had a meeting that was running late. She called me to ask if I would mind."

"Cool." She nodded and she bit her lip, looking at me. "Ash?" I loved how she shortened my name. I was so nervous she wouldn't like me but that all changed when she started to talk with me, not just to me.

"Hmm?" I smiled as she swallowed a little.

"I just wanted to say sorry again for being mean and slamming doors in your face." Lucas whispered. "And thank you for staying here. I don't know what I would do if I had lost Dylan."

"Well, I don't know what I'd do without you guys either." I whispered as if it were a secret. Lucas grinned and blushed, putting her head down slightly. "But that stays between us."

It was true though, the two blonde Carlins were helping me heal more than they realized.

"Hmm," I heard that sultry silky voice waft through the café, "my three favourite ladies here to meet me, how sweet." I turned to see Spencer walking our way with Dylan's hand in her own.

"I was just telling Ashley the only reason why I'm friends with her is because of her mustang." Lucas nodded and winked at me.

I chuckled and nodded. "It's true. I'm being used because of my car."

"Ah," Spencer nodded with a teasing twinkle in her eye as she slid in next to me, her hand immediately finding my leg under the table to squeeze it briefly, "I remember being that way in high school too."

"Spencer!" I laughed and she grinned, looking back at the girls, winking.

"Spencer!" Jaiden mocked me as she brought a round of hot chocolate. "How's my favourite blonde?" Her eyes looked at Spencer's.

"Hey!" Lucas pouted.

"And by favourite blonde, I meant second favourite blonde." Jaiden grinned. "You know you're my all time favourite girl, Luc."

Lucas grinned and quickly shot Dylan a 'shut up' look. Both younger girls erupted into giggles.

"I'm good Jai," Spencer nodded, "thank you for taking the girls tonight. I know it was short notice."

"Please," Jaiden laughed, "I'm used to it with you."

I raised an eyebrow and Spencer laughed nervously before elbowing the teen. "Thank you." She said through clenched teeth.

The raven haired teen flinched and mouthed a sorry. "No problem." She shrugged.

"So what do you three plan on doing?" I asked, wanting the subject to be changed.

"Oh you know," Jaiden sighed teasingly, "the usual."

Lucas and Dylan chuckled.

"Which would be..." I stared at the teen.

"Luc and I usually head to Haps, grab a couple of girls, a few drinks, go back to her place and have a little fun..." Jaiden mock-frowned, "but Dylan usually grabs the cute bouncer's attention and drags him along..."

"Jaiden Wynters." Spencer scolded in a warning tone.

"I figured since it is a school night," Jaiden sighed defeated, "I'd make sure they have their homework done and take them to Central Park to skate for a bit after my shift."

"YAY!" Dylan clapped, her brown eyes wide with amazement. My girl loved her skating.

"Can we play hockey?" Lucas asked, smiling. "Dyl and I against you." She looked at the teenager.

"No way!" Jaiden laughed. "You are so much better than me, and I refuse to get beaten by a Carlin."

"Then don't lose." Spencer mumbled with a wink.

I chuckled. "Well just be safe and have fun."

"Always Momma Davies." Jaiden winked. "I have to finish cleaning up but I'll be back." She leaned over to ruffle the girls' hair and took off.

"Mom, can we go read?" Lucas asked Spencer, already shoving Dylan out of the booth gently.

Spencer nodded and waited until the girls were at the other side of the place before turning to look at me. "I missed you." She whispered. "All I can think about is kissing you, God I couldn't stop thinking about kissing you all day." She confessed as her eyes dropped to my lips.

I swallowed and nodded, knowing completely how she felt. It seemed that since we moved forward somewhat, the physical aspect halted for some odd reason. I hated the fact that I couldn't just grab her when I wanted too, but we agreed we'd talk about it when we figured exactly where we were heading.

We both knew where we were headed; at the same time we both weren't ready to vocalize it.

"So what do you have planned for tonight?" I asked, clearing my throat and breaking the thick trance we were both in.

"Mmm," she purred and quickly kissed my cheek before hopping into the other booth, facing me, "that's a surprise."

I grinned. "I like surprises."

"You hate them." Spencer raised an eyebrow.

"Okay, I hate them," I sighed, "but your surprises always make me smile."

"And hopefully tonight will be no different." Spencer nodded somewhat shyly. "It's not a big deal," she shrugged, "I just wanted us to spend some uninterrupted time together."

"And that's perfect." I whispered in all honesty.

**--**

**Next time in Points Underneath:**

_I caught her eyes looking at me and I just smiled. There was no use blushing. I knew what I wanted._

She was right in front of me.

"So, say this night ends well, I'm assuming there'll be a repeat?" Spencer quirked an eyebrow and thanked the waitress as she set down our drinks.

"Many I'd hope." I smiled innocently and busied myself by checking out the menu.


	62. My Place

**48.2 - My Place**

**Ashley's PoV**

Since Spencer went to the café right after she got off work, she wanted to go home and change quickly. I didn't mind what she wore but that was one of the 'girly' sides of Spencer. She liked to look good.

For me.

What? It was true. She had admitted it and I was the exact same way.

I waited patiently in my hotel room since she had insisted on picking me up. Okay, so I changed and made myself look good as well. The weather was freezing outside but I still managed to put on a white fitted sweater and a light pair of denim jeans. Spencer complimented my black studded belt so I threw that on for good measure as well. My hair was pulled back a bit, allowing the loose wavy curls to frame my face yet expose my neck at the same time.

Finally, there was a knock at the door and I grinned, trying to act casual when I opened it to reveal a breathtaking beautiful blonde standing there with a small bouquet of orchids. Spencer was decked out in black, making her look sleeker and the dark colour contrasted perfectly with her rosy cheeks and bright bluish grey eyes. "Wow," I breathed and Spencer licked her lips, nodding in agreement.

"You look amazing." She whispered and handed me the flowers.

"Thank you," I blushed a little and stepped aside, allowing her to come in while I grabbed my coat, "I didn't think you could get anymore gorgeous."

"Really?" Spencer tilted her head with a shy grin. "You should see me in a dress."

One day, Spence.

One day.

I just laughed softly and put the orchids on the dresser. I slipped my coat on and made sure I had my keys and soon found myself walking down the long corridor with my hand in hers.

"So I was thinking we'd have some dinner," Spencer smiled, squeezing my hand, "I know the girls ate after school but I didn't see any food in front of you."

"I wasn't hungry." I shrugged and shivered as soon as the cold air hit our skin. "But I am now."

"You need to eat." Spencer joked lightly as she poked my skinny stomach. "You are taking care of yourself, right?"

"Yes mother." I rolled my eyes and noticed her stop and glare seriously at me. "Yes baby," I whispered, cupping her cheek gently, "I am taking care of myself."

"Good." Spencer nodded, believing me instantly. That feeling alone made me float even higher. "I'd hate to really have to beat your ass if you aren't."

"No beatings necessary." I chuckled and thanked her as she opened the door to her Blazer for me.

"It's no mustang," she quipped with a wink, "but you know what they say, it's not the type of vehicle you drive that counts – it's who's behind the wheel."

"Huh," I frowned mockingly, "don't think I've ever heard that one before."

Spencer let out a carefree laugh and made her way out of the parking lot.

The drive was comfortably quiet. I watched the buildings on Main Street pass me by with their pretty Christmas displays already set up. "So where are we going?" I asked as we started to head towards Keewatin.

"My Place." Spencer shrugged with a soft smile.

"Your place?" I raised an eyebrow. "You wanted to go home and get dressed up just to go back there?"

Spencer laughed and shook her head. "No," she grinned, "My Place is a small restaurant in Keewatin. They have the best chicken parmesan pasta."

"Oh." I blushed, feeling a little more than embarrassed. "What a name for a restaurant."

"Don't be embarrassed babe," Spencer laughed, "most people have that same reaction a lot."

I raised an eyebrow and shifted to face her. "Really."

"Of course." She looked at me funny. "What's with the famous 'Ashley Davies eyebrow raise' look?"

I faltered with my tough exterior look and cracked a smile. "So you uh, take girls to My Place a lot?"

"I've taken girls to my place sure, but never yours." Spencer smirked.

"What?" I frowned in confusion before the sound of her laughter rang through the vehicle. "Spencer!" I slapped her thigh and huffed, looking back at the road in front of us.

"No." Spencer smiled as her eyes stayed on the road as well. "I've never taken anyone to My Place."

"Ugh." I chuckled, rolling my neck and snorted, "this is getting way too confusing."

"My Place, the restaurant, you're the first." I felt her hand rest on my leg, her eyes still trained on the road. "I promise." She said quietly and looked at me briefly with a soft smile. "I've actually only been there once with Luc and Carmen."

"So there was a girl."

"Two if you wanna get technical." I watched her roll her eyes and squeeze my leg. "Besides, you really can't count Carmen as a girl, or lady...or woman…"

We both snickered and I smiled, bringing her cold hand to my lips, kissing her fingers lightly. "I'm just happy that we're together tonight."

"With no interruptions." My blonde beauty grinned and wiggled her eyebrows.

"To talk of course." I said too seriously before grinning again like an idiot.

Hello, time? Ashley Davies here, are you sure we never transported back into high school?

No?

Sure as hell felt like it with all the nervous giggles and shit.

"Oh of course." Spencer nodded with a straight face. "Talking and healing," she made a right and turned off into the small community of Keewatin, "if it involves sexual healing, then so be it." She shrugged.

I laughed and she licked her lips suggestively.

Okay, so that wasn't a joke.

I could handle that.

"How uh, how long do we have until?" I asked, taking off my seatbelt as Spencer parked her vehicle in front of a very small restaurant with a sign above in cursive writing 'My Place'.

"Lucas usually likes to curl up on the couch with Jaiden while her homework gets finished and then they watched a movie before it's bedtime. From there, Jaiden is on her laptop, or the phone or snooping through my office for blackmail in case she decides to 'get bored' and invite one of her girlfriends over." Spencer sighed like it was no big deal and then smiled, "but with Dylan there now, she usually wears them both out by playing hockey or air hockey in the basement or something so they all end up crashing on the couch by the time I get home."

I nodded slowly and hopped out into the cold outside of the warm vehicle we were just in. "So Dylan behaves for Jaiden?"

"Ash," Spencer smiled at me and wrapped an arm around my waist, "the girls are crazy about Jaiden and they would never do anything to upset her. Dylan is by far the kindest most respectful young girl I have ever seen. Lucas is pretty damn sweet herself but she's got some bite with her bark."

"Much like you." I observed with a nose crinkle smile.

"Exactly." Spencer nodded and opened the door for me. The place was absolutely breath taking. It was small and intimate. Every table had its own candle center piece, the floors were polished hardwood and the bar that was towards the back was all black. The colour complimented everything so well.

"Good evening ladies," a young waitress smiled as she approached us, "how are you this evening?"

"Good thank you." Spencer smiled politely and purposefully slid her hand into mine. "We have reservations for two under Carlin."

"Right," she acknowledged us with a light smile and showed us to our corner table. "My name is Natasha and I'll be your waitress. May I start you out with a drink?"

"Uh," Spencer looked over the beverage menu quickly and smiled up at the blonde waitress, "I'll start off with some ice water."

_Oh Spencer, you will be ordering Dr. Pepper sometime before the evening ends._

"Same." I smiled as Spencer grinned. "Water? Romantic."

"Take it or leave it baby." She chuckled and took off her coat.

"Definitely take." I murmured, shrugging off my own coat. I caught her eyes looking at me and I just smiled. There was no use blushing. I knew what I wanted.

She was right in front of me.

"So, say this night ends well, I'm assuming there'll be a repeat?" Spencer quirked an eyebrow and thanked the waitress as she set down our drinks.

"Many I'd hope." I smiled innocently and busied myself by checking out the menu.

"You got it." Spencer said out of nowhere and I looked up at her in confusion. She had a small smirk on her face with a slight knowing look.

"Got what?" I asked.

"The job." She said with an eye roll and leaned forward a bit. "You weren't freaking out about the interview. Probably because when I asked you yesterday, you had no clue what was going on. Now? You're calm."

"Not true," I squared my jaw with a challenge, "what if I didn't want to ruin our date with my depressing news?"

"You lie like a dog on a hot day, Davies." Spencer scolded playfully. She raised her glass of ice water and smiled wide, her genuine smile, "well congratulations baby, I am so happy and proud of you."

I melted yet again.

And again when she scooted her chair back and moved towards me, taking my face in her warm hands and feeling the softest pressure of her plush lips against my own. "Really proud of you."

"Thank you." I whispered. My eyes were still closed with the emotion running through my body that I never even noticed she was back at her chair and the waitress was back at our table, ready to take our orders.

"What do you find good here?" Spencer smiled her polite smile up at Natasha.

"Oh well," the young blonde cleared her throat and tore her eyes away from Spencer to grab a menu, reading it quickly, "I love the Thai chicken balls with fettuccini in our homemade alfredo mushroom sauce."

Mmm, that sounded good.

"I'll have that." I smiled and looked over at Spencer, who was still looking at the menu.

"I'll have the chicken club with a tossed salad instead of fries." She handed the menu back, not taking her eyes off of me. "And a Dr. Pepper."

_I told you._

"You can't go anywhere without ordering that, can you?" I chuckled.

"I can't have it at Timmy's." Her blonde hair fell forward a bit as she pouted.

"Aww." I laughed and grabbed her hand. "How about I just buy you a dozen cases and then you'd be good for like, a week."

"Har har." Spencer sneered playfully and then thought about it. "It'd last me two weeks, thank you very much."

I laughed.

**--**

**Next time in Points Underneath:**

_"We should talk." I whispered, watching the shadows dance across her face with grace. "I miss hearing your voice."_

She dipped her head slightly and smiled before looking back at me. "What did you want to talk about?"

"Everything." I shrugged and got comfortable, sitting cross-legged in front of her so that our knees were touching. "Like," I tapped my fingers against the plastic bottle I had grabbed quickly, "tell me one thing you did that you thought you'd never do over the past twelve years."


	63. Her Place

**Flashbacks are in **_italics._

**This flashback was taken from **Wash It All Away – **Chapter 44.2: **_**The Key To Life Is...**_

**48.3 - Her Place**

**Spencer's PoV**

Success!

Ashley and I have been talking about the little stuff during our meal at My Place.

I wanted to make her getting the job a bigger deal, but telling her just how happy and proud I was of her sent her to the moon and back, so I thought that was a big deal. She promised to talk more about it when she really got her foot in the door.

I had no problems with that.

Ashley gave me directions to where she wanted me to go. She told me I wouldn't be disappointed and the moment she told me to turn down McLean Avenue, I knew where we were going.

Her house.

"Welcome to my humble abode." Ashley grinned as she opened the door and kicked off her shoes. She turned on a flashlight she had grabbed from her car and searched a box in the hallway. "Ah ha!" She waved candles at me and wiggled her eyebrows. "Davies has some charm as well."

"Romantic." I smirked and wrapped my arms around her waist from behind, kissing the back of her neck. I looked up and noticed the view Ashley had from her own living room window.

_My place._

"Now that is a beautiful view." I murmured against her neck.

"Yeah," Ashley smiled and leaned into me. "Dylan was super excited to know we'd still be in view of your place."

"Lucas too, I'm sure." I added.

We talked about the girls' games coming up and their school grades. I shared stories of Dylan while she was in my care before I knew she was a Davies. Ashley shared me younger stories of her daughter and we both realized she had not changed one single bit.

I warned her that it'd change because knowing Lucas, she'd be corrupting her daughter into a 'dark' side.

You know, sleeping in when you're supposed to be getting up for school.

Not going to bed right away when asked.

Talking on the phone for hours.

"Gee," Ashley laughed and nudged me as we sat in the middle of her empty living room of her new house. The room was lit by candles and Ashley thanked herself for having the heat turned on early so she could work on it during the evenings before her and Dylan moved in. "You're making it sound like a blast once my kid hits the age of twelve."

"Eh," I shrugged and looked around the darkened small yet spacious room, "like I said, I don't see Dylan being a problem. Hell Luc isn't a problem, she's just more vocal."

"Yet you can barely get her to go to school?" Her perfect eyebrow rose in question.

"I cheat." I said seriously. "No school, no hockey. No hockey, no happy Luc."

"And one happy Luc makes one happy Spencer, right?" Ashley grinned and moved to grab another bottle of Dr. Pepper from her mini-fridge.

"Right." I nodded and frowned, "wait, am I using reversed psychology on myself?"

"You need to stop drinking all this caffeine." Ashley laughed but handed me a Dr. Pepper anyway.

"_You_ need to stop drinking the caffeine," I said seriously, "little Ashley has school tomorrow!"

"Spence," Ashley chuckled and looked at her watch, "it's only after ten."

"Ugh, it's late." I groaned and she continued to laugh at me. "What? I have three meetings tomorrow and one of them is not going to be a happy one."

"I'm sorry." Ashley frowned in concern as if she were remembering what exactly my job entailed again. "Did you want to go?"

"No." I whispered honestly and moved the drink aside before crawling across the freshly cleaned floor and found myself sitting in the brunette's lap, my mouth on hers softly.

Ashley was so _fucking_ addictive.

Fingers traced cheekbones as mouths continued to connect in light and deep kisses. I shifted more comfortably in her lap and let out a breathy moan when her hands slipped from my face and down my sides, gripping my hips tighter.

The kisses turned hotter and needier.

"God Spencer." Ashley finally pulled away slightly, her eyes dark and wide. "The things you do to me."

"Care to share?" I whispered and grinned when she chuckled throatily and nipped at my bottom lip before we fell into another round of kisses.

I couldn't tell you exactly how good it felt to be there with Ashley. Kissing and holding her without any interruptions. Just the two of us reconnecting in ways we felt were validated.

No words could really describe how I was feeling; how every day since Ashley returned, I woke up feeling happier than I ever have before. I felt like I could make it through a rough day knowing that I would be able to see her. Knowing that in some cosmic way, fate brought us together the moment Dylan was handed to me under my care.

Thank you, Dad.

I was thankful, don't get me wrong. It was the way everyone went about it that pissed me off.

Ashley was as much in the dark as I was but for some reason, she didn't seem as angry as I did. It saddened her more than anything.

I was a Carlin though and anger ran through my veins. It was a good adrenaline rush for hockey.

A moan brought me back from my thoughts and Ashley's grip around my hips seemed more desperate. It was amazing how easily we would fall back into each other. It was the kind of connection most people long for.

And I hadn't had it for twelve years yet there I was, straddling the woman who left me that long ago – with all of that passion and connection back in place as if it were never removed.

Suddenly all I wanted to do was talk. As good as it felt to have her kissing me and vice versa, there was so much more to us than the need to be physically attached. I missed her skin, her lips, her touches, the sounds she made…

…but I missed hearing her voice when she'd talk to me; talk with me.

I grazed my lips against hers softer that time and smiled before scooting off her lap. I couldn't tell you how long the rational side of my brain will work so I figured it'd be best to detach myself before my 'lower' brain took over again.

"Is everything okay?" Ashley asked breathlessly, her thumb reaching out to run across my bottom lip briefly.

"Perfect." I nodded and kissed her to let her know I wasn't lying. "I just thought of something."

Ashley bit her lip and sat back, looking at me curiously.

"We should talk." I whispered, watching the shadows dance across her face with grace. "I miss hearing your voice."

She dipped her head slightly and smiled before looking back at me. "What did you want to talk about?"

"Everything." I shrugged and got comfortable, sitting cross-legged in front of her so that our knees were touching. "Like," I tapped my fingers against the plastic bottle I had grabbed quickly, "tell me one thing you did that you thought you'd never do over the past twelve years."

She leaned back on her hands and stared up at the ceiling, as if she were thinking really hard for a good answer. "Probably having Dylan." Her eyes met mine. "Life was great with Alex," she swallowed and I just smiled to let her know that I understood their friendship back then and I wasn't going to be upset over anything she said, "I created a lot of music and it was really awesome for a while there. Then I just wanted out. I didn't want that life anymore and soon found myself wanting a family. A baby. Someone I could take care of and just… I thought about it for over a year before deciding I was going to go through with it."

"Go through it alone?" I asked softly.

"Yes." Ashley nodded and smiled, shrugging a little bit. "It was my thing. Something for me. I knew if I had told Alex about it before hand, she'd talk me out of it."

"So you never thought you'd have children?" I asked curiously.

"Well yes," she blushed, "in high school, remember I was trying to figure out how to make 'Spencer' babies?"

//

_"So what did you get me?" I whispered in Ashley's ear during Family Studies class._

__

"A bong." Ashley smirked as my face lit up.

_"Seriously?" I smiled but then frowned. "And you say __**I'm**__ the romantic one."_

__

"Well…" Her tongue rolled between her teeth as she smiled widely at me, "since you told me that I couldn't make plans for tonight, I figured I'd just give you another quickie in the girl's change room."

_I smirked and shook my head. "And you say __**I'm**__ the insatiable one."_

__

"You are." Ashley smiled and tapped my book. "Do your work Carlin."

I gasped. How dare she use my line! I was not getting distracted! "I will if you will."

_"I am." Ashley whispered and pointed to her notebook. I leaned over as she pointed to what she had written: __**How to make Spencer babies.**_

__

I burst into laughter and was immediately called on it by the teacher. "Miss Carlin."

"Sorry," I mumbled between giggles and looked at Ashley, who was smiling wide.

_"Well it is Family Studies, Parenting. I would love to know how to make a Spencer baby." Ashley said seriously and continued to scribble hearts around my name._

//

Oh.

Yeah.

I grinned and nodded.

"Now I have a 'Spencer' pre-teen." Ashley poked me slightly and I blushed. "You really slept with a guy?"

"Don't remind me." I groaned.

"I think I've said this a gazillion times but Lucas is gorgeous, Spence." Ashley whispered. "You would think that you had her all on your own, she's such a spitting image of you."

"I could say the same with Dylan." I grinned and she sighed, smiling at the mention of her daughter's name. "Why Dylan?"

"Huh?" She looked at me slightly confused.

"Why did you name her Dylan?" I asked again, that time licking my own lips.

"She was my girl," Ashley's brown eyes gazed at me with intense emotion, "and the moment I laid eyes on her, I could see you."

"Me?" I whispered in awe.

"Duh Spence," Ashley giggled quietly, "I had her name picked out regardless if she was going to be a boy or a girl, so I named her Dylan Marie Davies."

"Marie for Alex?" I asked quietly.

"She was there for me." Ashley sighed and our eye contact finally broke. "I hate that she wasn't there for you Spencer and if I had known, I would've at least talked to her about it. Alex bringing you up was a big no to her. She never told me why you two went so long without talking to each other and frankly, I found it none of my business. I just figured if she wanted to talk to me about it, she would. I wouldn't push."

I nodded and understood – to a point. "You never mentioned me?"

"I did." Ashley swallowed. "I remember," she laughed quietly to herself, "Dylan used to ask who 'the blonde' hockey player was that was in my dresser drawer."

"Underwear drawer?" I smirked and she laughed. "You had a picture of me?"

"That collectible 2010 Vancouver Olympic trading card. It was a picture of you scoring the winning goal." Ashley blushed and cleared her throat. "Dylan was only three when she found it laying out on the bed. We were getting ready to move across the city so I could head to school and I had all of my clothes scattered on the bed. She loved my clothes and wore the shirts as oversized dresses when she was younger."

"Aww." I giggled. I could just picture the miniature Ashley running around in her mom's clothes.

"So she picked it up and asked who 'the hotey payer is'." She imitated a three year old voice. "And I told her that the hockey player was someone I was very closed to and missed a lot."

I looked at her and felt my heart beating against my chest. "Lucas knew of you as a friend. I mean, she liked to snoop a lot and then there was a point when she'd ask questions and I didn't like to hide things from her. It wasn't until after we had Dylan that she put two and two together, connecting my past with my present."

"Wow," Ashley breathed, "smarty pants."

"Indeed." I nodded with a smile. "So you said you came to my games all the time?"

"All of them." Ashley blushed. "Not to sound like a creepy stalker but it was the only part of you I had. Hockey became a thing with Dylan afterwards. I'd never let her play but she'd constantly watch."

"Every single game?" I asked.

"Including the ones across the world." Ashley moved close, her lips whispering against mine. "I should have never left you, Spencer. I should have never gotten scared and ran the way I did. I should have been more mature about it and talk to you with how I was feeling. I know we could've made things work out."

"Ash." I breathed painfully and closed my eyes. The past still stung a little but I knew she had to say these things. I knew she wasn't doing it to hurt us by revisiting painful events, it was just part of healing us. "Maybe I shouldn't have been so pushy or self-involved."

"Self-involved?" She sat back and stared at me. "Spencer, you were a teenager who really knew what she wanted in life. You had a dream and you were going to go through with it regardless. That takes a lot of balls, don't you think?"

"It cost me you." I blinked and found myself whispering a little.

"No, I was the one that took the easy way out for me." Ashley said firmly and I found my face in her hands. "You were so fucking perfect, Carlin. You were the most gorgeous girl and you wanted me. You were willing to throw everything away for me. You were just so perfect and loved me unconditionally and ugh," she pressed her forehead against mine, "I'm so lucky to have you here with me right now. Breathing the same air, sharing those sweet kisses, just – talking to me."

"Ashley…"

"I should have been better. I should have known better, you know?" Ashley finally stopped and closed her eyes. "I should have loved you more."

"Do you?" I asked, closing my own eyes. "Do you love me more now?"

"I never stopped." Ashley whispered against my lips. "Never, Spencer. Even when we were apart, I found myself falling more in love with you."

I smiled and felt tears fill my eyes. "Say it."

"I love you." Ashley opened her own teary eyes. "I love you so much. I'm so in love with you that it still scares me but I'm not going to run this time. I'm not going to go anywhere."

I licked my lips and leaned forward, my lips finally connecting with hers gently. "I love you, Ashley." I whispered.

It didn't matter when Ashley and I confessed those three words again because regardless, it was what we felt and what was felt all along.

"Tell me," she pulled back and wiped her eyes lightly, "what do you think was the best move you've made in the past twelve years?"

"Coming home." I sighed and looked around the empty house. "Kenora was the one place you promised me happiness and I found it - without you even. Not like that 'oh I'm so happy I don't need anyone' kind of way. Just that I knew I could make it work with just Luc and me."

"Good." Ashley smiled and stood up, taking my hand in hers, pulling me up as well. Her hands went behind my neck and then her head was lying on my shoulder. "I missed this smell right here." Her nose lightly brushed my neck as she inhaled. "I remember it'd be a little sweeter after you'd play hockey."

"Ah, the sweat you were obsessed with." I teased and held her tighter against me.

"I wasn't obsessed!" Ashley laughed and slapped my chest before looking at me. She was so gorgeous. "I just had a thing."

"Oh, a _thing_." I nodded with a hearty laugh. "Well I missed this," I leaned forward and pressed my lips to the tip of her nose, "you're cute."

"Want to get out of here?" Ashley blinked and ran her fingers through my hair.

"Am I boring you?" I pouted.

"No you goober," Ashley shook her head with a chuckle, "I just figured you had other plans and I didn't want to monopolize them."

I looked around the place and nodded. "We should walk though."

"Walk?" Her eyes went wide as saucers. "Spencer, you live-"

"Right across the lake. The frozen lake." I nodded with a grin and went to grab my boots to put them on.

"What?" She laughed at me as if I were crazy. "Spencer!"

"Hey," I turned around and pulled her towards the door after blowing out all the candles, "We're not driving. Now come on and grab your coat. There's no trail on the ice so it'll be slightly deep."

"I also missed you taking charge." Ashley growled under her breath and slapped my ass before grabbing her coat and shoes.

Once we were outside, I felt her hand slide into mine as we started to climb down the uncovered pathway to her dock area. I had a lot of snow falling into my boots and I knew Ashley had snow in her shoes already too.

"Are you sure the ice is safe?" Her brown eyes looked at me worriedly.

"I've lived on this river for years Ash. Lucas and I sometime walk clear across there just to do some ice fishing with Eph and Chase. It's safe." I squeezed her hand. "Trust me."

"I do." She smiled and that was the end of conversation.

We made it safely to my end of the lake and sighed with relief when we finally found a clear path to walk on. "My feet are fucking cold!"

"No shit Sherlock." Ashley's teeth chattered and I let her go up the stairs in front of me. "I call shower first."

**--**

**Next time in Points Underneath:**

_"So what you're saying is that in order to get her attention, I need to talk to her?" I asked with my hand on my chin._

__

"Duh." Lucas chuckled and pulled her covers back over Dylan.

I didn't know her last name though, but because of role call, I knew her first.

Eliza.

_"Stop drooling." Dylan poked my cheek as she doodled a cartoon character on my math notebook. "It's not attractive."_

_"Dude's got a point." Lucas shrugged and sketched a picture of some scenery out of a magazine. "If you like her so much, ask her out."_


	64. Dude's Got A Point

**48.4 - Dude's Got A Point **

**Jaiden's PoV**

"So what you're saying is that in order to get her attention, I need to talk to her?" I asked with my hand on my chin.

"Duh." Lucas chuckled and pulled her covers back over Dylan.

There was this new girl in school who had just transferred from Thunder Bay. She was so beautiful you had no idea. Hazel eyes, freckles everywhere, long curls that were actually ringlets. She was so quiet and shy but she threw me smiles every now and then in music class.

I was in heaven at school.

I actually looked forward to it.

I didn't know her last name though, but because of role call, I knew her first.

Eliza.

"Stop drooling." Dylan poked my cheek as she doodled a cartoon character on my math notebook. "It's not attractive."

"Dude's got a point." Lucas shrugged and sketched a picture of some scenery out of a magazine. "If you like her so much, ask her out."

I had always seemed to have been getting all of my girl advice from two girls who were five and seven years younger than me. I should've felt threatened but I didn't.

I was grateful.

Why? Because they had nothing to compare it by. They told me what they thought without lying because they didn't know any better.

And that gave me confidence.

Samantha Taylor was just a crush and you know, I was actually happy for her and Carmen. I thought I'd feel heartbroken but I didn't.

Eliza.

"Eliza?" Lucas frowned and looked at me with her big grey Carlin eyes. I think I had just said 'Eliza' out loud.

"Uh, you know it's getting late and you two need to get to bed so I can finish my trig homework." I laughed and grabbed my books.

"I need my beauty sleep anyway." Lucas shrugged and giggled as Dylan agreed, which had the blonde throwing a pillow at her younger sister.

I hoped everything worked out between Spencer and Ashley. I had known Spencer for years and the only reason I knew about her rendezvous with Aimee was because I had overheard a conversation between Spence and my mom, Chase. Then I decided to be cool and take care of Luc while Spencer got her freak on with the hot newly divorced blonde.

Yet I had never seen them together. Ever. No dating, there was no talking about Aimee afterwards and there was no telling Lucas about her mommy's new play toy.

With Ashley however, they had history. I was a part of their history. I was told by my parents that Ashley had proposed to Spencer in Kenora when they were my age. I was told that Spencer was my idol for a while there even though she was just a kid passing through town – but because she played hockey I had found her fascinating.

So to have her return back years later with a four year old Lucas was like fate.

Not sure what kind of fate but it was fate.

That I would figure out later on in life.

Spencer kicked ass as a coach. She was the best and she was honest with everyone. She pushed us but not to the point where we hated her. She let us have breaks and if we lost a game, she wouldn't throw it back in our faces.

"Are you spending the night?" I heard Lucas yawn, breaking me free from my thoughts.

"No," I smiled and moved to get up off her bed, closing my math book and grabbing my pencil. Dylan was already passed out and I chuckled quietly, about to pick her up.

"No," Lucas shook her head and brushed her fingers through Dylan's hair, "she's fine here."

I nodded. "Okay." I leaned in to kiss Lucas on the cheek and then Dylan on the forehead. "Sweetest dreams," I whispered, "Luc," she stared back at me, "thank you for everything."

Lucas blushed a little and shrugged. "What are best friends for?"

God, she was definitely a keeper.

I went downstairs after gathering my books up and as soon as I hit the bottom of the stairs, I heard the shower going.

Huh?

"Hello?" I called out and jumped as Spencer poked her head out from towards the kitchen. "Fucking A you scared the shit out of me!"

"Language." Spencer teased and shrugged. "Sorry about scaring you."

"It's okay," I took a moment to catch my heart to start beating again, "when did you get in and why are you wet?"

Spencer smirked and I rolled my eyes.

Pervy minds think alike.

"We just got in about five minutes ago. We walked from her place." Spencer pointed out the window towards, what would have been a house but it was so dark out I couldn't see it.

"Nice," I grinned.

"Ashley's in the shower unthawing." She snickered and peeled off her own sweater, throwing it towards the laundry room down the hall.

"I figured you'd help her out with that." I winked and grabbed my book bag.

"Oh little one, you have so much to learn." Spencer chuckled and sat down on the couch with a mug of hot chocolate. "Are you taking off?"

"I should." I yawned and stretched. "The girls finished their homework and helped me with mine as well as my girl troubles. Lucas just went to sleep, my fault, I kept her up."

"Not surprised." Spencer shrugged and stood to hug me. "Drive safe, please?"

I nodded and thanked whoever above that I had someone like Spencer in my life. She was the best older sister one could ask for. Not that she was a real older sister, but she never treated me any differently than a younger sibling and best friend; a sister who was twelve years older than I was.

"Okay Spence," Ashley came out of the shower in a t-shirt and flannel pants, "shower is all yours." She looked at me and smiled, stopping by the couch. "The girls were good for you?"

Aww, she was worried about her girls' behaviour. "They were perfect angels." I said honestly with a grin. "Sometimes I feel like they're babysitting me."

"Now that's a scary thought." Spencer snickered and made her way slowly towards the bathroom. "Hey Jai," she smiled softly, "practice is optional tomorrow."

Optional?

"Since when is practice optional?" I raised an eyebrow and glanced between her and Ashley.

"I'm Coach and that's what I've decided. You can show up or sleep in. Your choice." Spencer shrugged casually.

Huh.

The light bulb went on in my head and I smirked, nodding slowly as I pointed between the two. "You two enjoy the rest of your night."

I quickly made my way out of the toasty warm house and laughed quietly, leaning against the door before laughing a little louder.

Spencer was so getting laid.

**--**

**Next time in Points Underneath**

_"Do you still snowboard?" I asked, my fingers trailing down the slope of her breast like they were snowboarding too. _

_"Mmm you bet your sweet ass I do, Carlin." Ashley huskily whispered, squeezing me closer to her. "I used to go to Whistler every winter but I haven't been for a couple of years. You know, with the situation and all."_

_"Yeah." I looked across the room, noticing it was getting a little lighter out. Time wasn't stopping for us anymore that morning._

_Damn it._


	65. Sleepless In Spencer's Bed

_**I don't own SoN! If I did, you'd be seeing it on a different network with heavier Spashley make-out scenes and it'll be going into it's 4th season. ; )  
First of THREE updates today! So make sure to check back!! **_

_**Rated NC-17/M (not TOO graphic)**_

**49 - Sleepless In Spencer's Bed**

**Spencer's PoV**

She sat there quietly, looking at the fire that was glaring back at her. I smiled and finished drying my dampened hair before tossing the towel towards the laundry room. I sat down and tucked away an almost dry curl from her face. "What are you thinking about?" I whispered and her brown eyes searched mine.

"You." She replied softly and licked her lips. "Thank you for tonight, Spencer. I had a really good time."

I smiled and felt myself blush a little bit. "It was just dinner."

"Just dinner?" Her eyes widened in disbelief. "Whether it was _just_ dinner or not, it was amazing."

God she had to stop looking at me like that. She was sitting there looking so peaceful and just as beautiful as I remember – if not more.

"Well you're welcome." I smiled and stood up, holding my hand out. "How about we put the fire out and head upstairs." Ashley looked at me with a raised eyebrow and was about to open her mouth when I pressed my finger against her lips. "The girls are sleeping and Ryn will be here before they even wake up. I'll get you to your hotel in the morning seeing as the arena is right beside it."

"Ryn will be here?" Ashley furrowed her eyebrows.

"Yea, she takes the girls to school the mornings I coach." I smiled and proceeded to put out the fire.

"I just figured they'd go with you." She smiled softly. "I mean, I know I would."

"Ah," I laughed, "but you're not a pre-teen. Sleep means everything to Lucas when she can sleep in."

"Hey, I was the exact same way." Ashley protested while she got up and followed me to the kitchen to grab some water. "It wasn't until you that I decided that early mornings were pretty decent."

"Huh." I kicked the fridge door closed with my foot and raised an eyebrow. "Is that why you would complain about me waking up early Saturday mornings?"

"Well hey now," Ashley pouted and bit her lip, "those were usually the mornings we'd fall asleep at like, four in the morning because of all the hot steamy sex."

I blushed and licked my bottom lip before biting it briefly. My eyes scanned her up and down before I flicked off the light switch and placed a hand on her lower back, gently ushering her towards the spiral staircase. "If I do recall," I whispered as we made our way down the darkened hallway upstairs, "you were the one that made sure we stayed up late."

"Never!" Ashley gasped and glared teasingly at me before she relented and shrugged. "What can I say Carlin, you're pretty much my Viagra."

"Oh God." I frowned and groaned. "That was so not sexy."

"Jus' sayin'." Ashley snickered and we found ourselves at Dylan's bedroom door. Quietly we opened it and found her bed neatly made and empty.

"Lucas kept her in her bed again." I whispered, knowing it happened often.

Ashley opened the blonde's door and her smile was melt worthy. Dylan was resting her head on Lucas' shoulder, both of them sleeping peacefully. "It's like they were meant to be sisters." She whispered in awe.

I looked at Ashley's profile and smiled. "They were."

Brown eyes stared at me and then the softest and shyest smile graced her lips.

I kissed both girls gently and watched Ashley do the same. Closing the door quietly behind us, we made our way to my bedroom. "You know," I murmured, turning around and wrapping my arms around her waist, "just because you had Dylan two years after I had Lucas and we weren't together, it doesn't mean that they weren't meant to be sisters." The suggestion in my tone was brave and outspoken. She had to have known I did think about 'us' as a family, just like I knew she thought about it too.

"I just wish things worked out differently, you know?" She gave me a half smile and shrugged. "But I am glad that we're here – together."

"And that is what matters." I nodded and kissed her softly before making my way to the bed. I sat down on the edge and watched as Ashley stood in the middle of the room looking slightly nervous. "Are you okay?" I asked quietly.

"Yeah." She released a sigh and smiled. "I just don't know if I can climb in that bed with you and not touch you."

Her admission made me smile and I let out a soft chuckle. Normally I would say some smartass comment right about then but I couldn't for some reason.

Maybe it was the way her body language looked so fragile.

Maybe I knew if I said anything like I normally would've, it'd ruin the intense moment that was circling us.

I felt like everything was frozen in time. I felt like with Ashley standing there, looking at me with such love and nervousness, I had something I needed to do. I needed her to feel safe. I needed her to feel loved.

I needed her to feel like the moment, every single moment we were sharing together, was real.

Instead of making a smartass comment, I stood up slowly. My eyes held hers captive as I clutched the bottom of my shirt and in one swift movement it was thrown across the room.

"Spencer." Ashley's breath hitched and her eyes grew heavier, the milk chocolate colour turning darker. She didn't miss a beat by taking a couple of steps towards me, stopping right in front of me. "You are so beautiful," she husked, making me blush a little harder.

Only Ashley could make me blush.

No matter what moment we may be in.

I gazed at her, never breaking that eye contact and dropped the soft flannel pants I had thrown on after my shower.

I swallowed when her brown orbs slowly trailed down my naked form, her lips parting slightly. She swallowed as well as she scanned her way back up and caught my gaze again.

I moved my hand and cupped the side of her face gently. We stood there for seconds before my lips finally sought hers delicately. She moaned softly and then louder as I pulled her tight against me. I shivered when her hands gripped my hips, squeezing them firmly. "Ashley," I breathed, closing my eyes in pleasure, "touch me."

A whimper escaped her lips and I found myself pushed back on the bed, her own hands beginning to rid herself from her clothing.

"Let me." I pleaded softly and pulled her closer to me by the hem of her shirt. She stood between my legs, her fingers moved into my hair when I lifted her shirt up a bit, exposing her stomach. I pressed my nose gently against her soft skin and inhaled. "I've missed this," I emphasized by inhaling again, kissing her stomach softly, "and this," I did it again just to hear her let out a quiet moan.

Her shirt was gone and I was working on her flannel bottoms. I stopped though, to admire the tattoo that stood out proudly. I traced it with the pad of my thumb before doing the same thing with my lips. Her pants dropped to the floor and I pressed my forehead against her abdomen, closing my eyes tightly, trying to regain my breathing.

The moment was also very overwhelming.

She stepped out of them and guided my face to look up at her. "Are you okay?"

I smiled and nodded, standing up to capture her lips in a heated kiss. She groaned and for the second time in twelve years, her body was flushed against mine. I moaned and cupped the back of her neck, deepening the kiss for a brief moment before backing away slightly. "I'm perfect." I answered in a low husky voice and turned us around.

I guided Ashley down on the bed, her back hitting the mattress softly and our bodies fusing together tightly. I wet my lips, watching her eyes drift to them and kissed her again, parting our legs to fit more perfectly. Our breaths hitched at the feeling of our bodies being pressed together in such a way that could only be described as 'unbelievably amazing'.

"God Spencer," Ashley's voice cracked when I moved to kiss her cheek, making my way down her neck gingerly.

"I dreamed about you," I whispered against her flushed skin, "I dreamed about your voice, your touch…" I moved lower, watching with heavy lidded eyes as her chest heaved, loving the way her fingers tangled themselves in my hair to tug me back up to kiss her.

Did I ever dream about her.

Hot and wet open mouthed kisses were shared for the longest time. Hips rocked against each other and I growled when her nails began to drag up my back more prominently. I wanted to taste her everywhere.

I wanted to tattoo her body full of kisses, licks and nips. I wanted to brand her.

She was mine.

I scooted down her body and stopped at her chest, stroking my tongue over a hardened nipple. "Baby," she whimpered and it gave me more confidence to draw it into my mouth. It swelled immediately and I hummed against her sensitive flesh. "Oh Spencer…"

Someone was really worked up.

Her hips began to move a little faster and harder against my thigh, smearing her desire on me. Oh God, I was going to explode soon.

The room felt like it had gotten ten times hotter and we were having one of the coldest nights of the year. The windows were even beginning to fog and that was not an exaggeration.

After spending a thorough amount of time on her breasts, I made my way down her ribcage, marking her perfect skin with marks here or there. Her moans were getting louder, the closer my lips swept down her stomach.

Fuck she was sexy.

I could feel the perspiration coating her skin with a light layer.

I inhaled her again, just revelling in her sweetness. My kisses drew lower, the flesh of my lips bumping against her quivering muscles. My fingers tweaked her nipples, making her back arch and she gasped.

"Ashley," I whispered in a low aroused voice. I flicked my eyes up to hers and she looked so achingly gorgeous with her brows knitted in anticipation, her bottom lip tucked between perfect teeth, "you have to be quiet, okay?"

I didn't give her a chance to respond. Her legs were placed over my shoulders and I dived into the sweetest molten dessert you could ever ask for…

…Ashley Davies.

--

The sky was a dark blue hue, indicating that the morning was fast approaching. I smiled as Ashley's fingers played with my hair while my chin rested on her stomach, looking up at her.

It was at least five orgasms later …

… each.

"Mmm," I whispered sleepily, "that feels so good."

"Yea?" Her husky voice still managed to get my insides boiling. "You make me feel so good, Carlin."

"Yea?" I grinned and propped myself up on my hands with what little energy I had left. "I'm sure we have time for one more round." I nuzzled her stomach and she giggled throatily.

"I have to start teaching today." Ashley sighed sleepily.

Oh.

Right.

"Damn," I couldn't help but smile, "we always seem to find ourselves in these predicaments."

"Well I'm certainly not complaining." Ashley groaned and stretched her body out, popping her back. Her breasts perfect in my line of vision. "Stop staring at them like that," she whispered and grinned as I crawled up her body, lowering myself down to steal a soft deep kiss.

It grew even hotter the moment I straddled her perfect hips and squeezed them with my thighs, deepening the kiss even more.

"Fuck you can kiss," she mumbled and trailed her fingertips down the spine of my back, making my back arch, therefore pushing her further into the mattress, "fuck Spencer."

"Okay, if you insist." I moaned hotly against her mouth and placed her hand between my legs, groaning as her fingers slid in so deep, so easily. "Oh fucki-" my words were trapped by her tongue sliding into my mouth, quieting me as my hips started to rock against her fingers.

"Oh yeah, you're so wet." Ashley breathed, her unoccupied hand cupping my face, keeping our foreheads pressed together. "Fuck yeah." She breathed again, licking my bottom lip with her tongue before driving it back inside the warm cavern of my mouth. "Fuck yes." She groaned as my hips started a harder rhythm against her.

Vocal Ashley was fucking sexy as hell.

She was starting to come undone just by the feel of my muscles clamping her fingers tightly. She was getting off on what she was doing to me. And that could not be any fucking hotter.

My lips fused to hers as I braced my hand next to her head, feeling myself tense quickly. Her fingers curled with each thrust and I couldn't help but want that feeling to stay. I wanted her to keep making me float higher and higher.

"Don't stop, Ash." I whimpered against her sweaty neck and that was when the hand that was cupping my face, fell to my hip and squeezed as I rode her hand hard. Her hips moved with mine with just enough force to make us both tumble over the edge – together.

"I fucking love when you come all over me." Ashley swallowed heavily and brought her fingers to her mouth, licking each one seductively. I fell into her arms with a heap and groaned in pleasure as my body trembled lightly.

We held each other in silence. My head was resting on her shoulder as I continued drawing my earlier patterns on her stomach. "We need a shower."

"Separately." Ashley scolded with a giggle.

I had to agree with her on that one. "You go first." I yawned, not really wanting to move.

"You go first." She yawned as well.

I had to coach a team for practice in less than an hour and she had to be at the high school in less than three.

We were the perfect pair.

She and I.

Me and Her.

Us.

"You." I said absentmindedly, idly stroking her cooling skin. It felt like old times. It felt like a school day and I had to be at practice early that morning. I grinned and closed my eyes, getting lost in the past yet still feeling the present. "Ash?" I whispered and looked at her closed eyes, a smile gracing her face.

"Mmm?"

"Do you still snowboard?" I asked, my fingers trailing down the slope of her breast like they were snowboarding too.

"Mmm you bet your sweet ass I do, Carlin." Ashley huskily whispered, squeezing me closer to her. "I used to go to Whistler every winter but I haven't been for a couple of years. You know, with the situation and all."

"Yeah." I looked across the room, noticing it was getting a little lighter out. Time wasn't stopping for us anymore that morning.

Damn it.

"I miss it though," her voice sounded through the quiet room, "but as much as I miss it, I definitely missed you more."

I looked up and hovered over her naked body. "Hockey was nothing without you."

"Spencer..."

"I mean it," I whispered and smiled, cupping her face softly, "I love the sport and I enjoyed playing it, don't get me wrong, but without you to share it with," I shrugged, "it didn't really mean anything. Every game I played was for you."

"Spence." Ashley breathed and ran her fingers through my hair, her nails scratching my scalp gently.

I blushed as she stared at me intently. It wasn't long before my alarm went off and we both looked at the clock. **4:30am**.

"Fuck." I pouted and sat up, straddling my beautiful brunette. "Do you have to go to school?"

Ashley chuckled and sat up, wrapping her arms around my neck, her lips brushing against mine briefly. "If I want to keep the job I've yet to start, yes."

I whined.

"Sleep when you get home from work, kay?" Ashley grinned and tapped my hips for me to move off of her so she could grab her clothes.

"What about you?" I asked softly.

"I'll take the girls out for dinner while you nap and then we'll switch." Ashley smiled and pulled a shirt over her head. "Now go shower quickly and walk me to your car that you so brilliantly left across the other side of the lake before the girls wake up."

I chuckled and nodded, grabbing a fresh pair of clothes. I quickly kissed Ashley before making my way to the shower.

I just had amazing sex all night long with the woman of my dreams.

Who needed sleep?

It wasn't like we went through a whole day without naps after a long night of making love.

Pssshh.

I didn't need sleep.

--

**Next time in Points Underneath:**

_"So whatever you did to Spencer last night, thank you."_

_I blushed._

_I mean, I took pride in things I could do for Spencer – in all ways. But to be called out on it by a seventeen year old was a little embarrassing._

_"She let us leave practice early and we actually had a short game without her stopping us to critique every move." Jaiden adjusted her bag and patted me on the back. "Thank you."_

_"Oh uh," I smiled and shrugged, "you're welcome?"_


	66. Lucas Learns, Ashley Teaches

_**SECOND update of the day. Check back for the third and last one of the day! Thank you all for the reviews and reading this. Really.**_

**50 - Lucas Learns – Ashley Teaches**

**Lucas' PoV**

I yawned as I heard the alarm go off in my mom's room. I sighed when I heard her shut it off quickly. It was way too early for a kid like me to be up. The sun wasn't even shining yet.

I turned to look at Dylan curled up with a pillow in her arms, facing the wall.

I had to pee.

I could hold it.

The shower came on and I knew she was getting ready to go and coach her team. Auntie Alex said that mom never really slept in because she was so used to getting up early in the mornings.

I didn't mind getting up early if I got to play hockey but other than that, I liked my sleep time.

Which was why I was getting grumpy because I knew I couldn't fall back asleep that easily.

"Lukey, stop moving." Dylan murmured in a sleepy haze and I felt guilty for tossing and turning so much.

"Sorry Dyl." I whispered and leaned over to kiss her cheek before getting up off the bed and tucking her back in. I pulled on my blue robe and grabbed my sketch book, turning on the small lamp at my desk and worked on getting my sketch finished of some scenery. I enjoyed sketching people more because it was like you could feel their emotions and expressions and capture such a moment.

I enjoyed my art.

I didn't feel my eyes getting heavy but before I knew it, I heard the front door downstairs shut and then Ryn was whistling her regular morning tune. It was going on five thirty and I fell asleep at my desk for a little under an hour.

I noticed Dylan took the golden opportunity of an empty bed and was sprawled across it diagonally. I smiled and shook my head, stifling a yawn before losing the fighting battle with my bladder.

After using the washroom and made my way down the hallway only to stop at the huge glass window that graced the upstairs. Movement caught my eye and I glanced out it, my grey eyes widening and head tilting at the sight.

Mom and Ashley.

Their mitt covered hands were clasped together as they made their way down the slippery hill towards the stairs that lead to the dock. "What the heck?" I whispered, wondering why they were heading down there in the first place.

I laughed out loud when Ashley took the first fall, her butt cold on the ground. My mom looked like she was laughing hard, knees bent to see if the brunette was okay. I laughed even more when Ashley pulled mom down with her, mocking her.

The sight was funny.

I was awake.

I was about to turn away when something dawned on me.

It was early in the morning.

Ashley was leaving the house with mom.

...

I gasped and squeezed my eyes shut when I happened to look back at the couple ... kissing.

"Oh my God!" I screamed of horror knowing _why_ Ashley spent the night.

What?

I was eleven, not stupid!

With an Aunt like Carmen and a mom like Spencer, I knew what _sex_ was.

"Gross!!!!" I screeched out loud and ran to my room, successfully waking up my sister and hiding under the covers, rubbing my eyes as if to clear the thoughts and images out of my innocent head.

"What's wrong?" Dylan asked wide-eyed, staring at me.

That was when I had to laugh.

I laughed because it was a little funny.

Mom and Ashley...

...together.

Then I felt relieved.

Relieved because as I stared at Dylan and her concerned face, I realized that the moment had finally arrived; we were a family.

_I,_ Lucas Evelyn Carlin, had a _real_ family.

But more importantly, my mom was _happy_.

--

**Ashley's PoV**

The school was huge. Of course not as huge as Southview but still. The Catholic school a few blocks away was even smaller than Beaver Brae. It was sad to know that the teaching position in Saint Thomas Aquinas turned me down because I was a 'lesbian' therefore making me a 'sin'.

Yeah, the town was still pretty shallow but then again, it wasn't exactly a huge city either.

So I stood outside in the cold, staring up at my new life. My new beginning.

One that I couldn't wait to step my foot into.

"Ashley?!" I turned around to find Jaiden with a grin on her face, her school bag tossed over her shoulder. "What are you doing here?"

"Uh, working?" I grinned and we started to walk towards the large front doors, climbing up a set of stairs first. "So, did you go to practice this morning?"

Spencer had dropped me off at the hotel where I quickly showered and dressed. She wanted to come up to my room but there was definitely one thing that hadn't change about that woman – her sex drive and insatiability.

I loved them both.

But I had to draw the line somewhere as much as I hated too.

"Of course." Jaiden looked at me as if I had two sets of heads. "Hockey is my middle name."

"I guess that goes well with 'Wynters'." I smirked and she shot me a teasing look.

"Haha." She stopped and leaned in close. "So whatever you did to Spencer last night, thank you."

I blushed.

I mean, I took pride in things I could do for Spencer – in all ways. But to be called out on it by a seventeen year old was a little embarrassing.

"She let us leave practice early and we actually had a short game without her stopping us to critique every move." Jaiden adjusted her bag and patted me on the back. "Thank you."

"Oh uh," I smiled and shrugged, "you're welcome?"

"Miss Davies!" I turned in the long stretched hallway to find a middle-aged man walking down in steady strides. He was the one that interviewed me briefly before passing my resume and application over to the school board.

"Mr. Treadway." I smiled politely.

"Good morning Jaiden," he nodded towards the teen.

"Principal Treadway." Jaiden nodded back and bit her bottom lip. "Well I'm going to go find some cool people in the cafeteria." And she was gone.

"We're excited to have you on board with us and please call me Will." He gestured for me to follow him. "Because this is a high school and we have four different grades to teach, you have a full music day ahead of you, I'll show you the music room."

It was not far from the first floor. They had built the music room in the basement area on the other side of the building from where the gym was. It was huge and the equipment was placed everywhere neatly. A piano stuck out from on top of the stage and the guitars were placed neatly on the shelves, as well as the all the woodwind and brass instrument cases.

"They share this room with the drama club from time to time if there are rehearsals going on for plays. Which with Christmas being just around the corner, they pretty much have the place booked." He was very friendly and he reminded me of my high school principal at Southview.

"If you have no classes to teach I'm sure you'd just use the spare time to work on worksheets. There are course guidelines you will have to follow but for the main part with music, it pretty much flows." Will Treadway handed me some envelopes. "Those are benefit packages you can fill out when you've got the time. You can hand them to Mrs. Fillion, the school's secretary when you're done. Oh," he hand me another sealed envelope, "this is your contract. The salary wage is on there but don't be intimidated, it'll increase the longer you stay with us."

I smirked. I didn't need the money.

I had Kenora.

With Spencer and Dylan and Lucas.

I had everything.

"Thanks." I replied politely.

"Any questions?" He raised an eyebrow.

I pretty much studied my class schedule and knew which grades would be coming in at what times. "If I have any, you'll be the first to know." I grinned and he nodded.

"That room over there is yours," he pointed to a smaller room and handed me a couple of keys, explaining what key was for which door, "it's your office."

"Oh." I had an office.

I grinned.

The bell began to ring and he told me that was the first bell of the morning. Another one would go off within the next fifteen minutes and students should be in class. Another bell would go on five minutes after that indicating it was the late bell and all students would get a late slip.

"Good luck Miss Davies." He smiled warmly.

"Ashley and thank you." I turned around and scoped out the room.

I could definitely get used to the place.

After twenty minutes, I found myself standing in front of a class of thirty eager students, staring back at me wide-eyed.

"Hi." I smiled with a wave and cleared my throat. "I'm Miss Davies, and I will be your teacher for the remainder of the semester."

They were silent.

"So, since I'm new and I don't know everyone yet, why don't we go around the room and you all can tell me what instruments you play." I offered and a heard a few groans but some quiet curly haired girl raised her hand politely.

"Um, I play drums." She smiled and shrugged a bit. "Oh, and my name is Eliza."

I nodded and smiled, thanking her silently for starting because the whole class shared their instruments and names.

"Ugh, sorry I'm late!" I heard the door slam and in there stood Jaiden Wynters. "Miss Davies…" she smirked and sauntered her way over to an empty chair in the front row. "Should've known this was the class you were teaching."

"Huh," I raised an eyebrow, "why are you so late? Class started ten minutes ago."

"Oh well," she sat back in her chair and crossed her legs, her eyes wandering over to the shy girl, "uh, I just had things to do."

"In your own time, Jaiden." I warned and smiled a little as Eliza looked up at Jaiden and then back down again.

"Sure." Jaiden nodded and looked back at me with an award winning smile. "What did I miss?"

"What instrument do you play?" I asked.

"The guitar," Jaiden sat up straight and pulled out her music folder like everyone else had done when they first entered the room, "are we actually going to play? Ms. Hebert would just make us do scales. I don't think we ever got to play a whole song before."

"Jai's right." Michael, I think his name was, agreed. "The teacher was bitter."

"I know right?" Jaiden turned around and looked at the guy who smiled easily at her.

"Well we will actually get to play something," I offered and looked through the old teacher's music notes. "Wow, she really was." I muttered and noticed nothing was being played at all. "Okay, go grab your instruments and we'll go from there."

A loud round of hoots and hollers made me smile. "You're awesome Miss D!"

I was likable.

Go me!

It was the end of the day and I was in my music office packing up my briefcase. I had four classes to teach during the day and found that they went by fast. I definitely enjoyed my first day and was more than happy that my students liked me and respected me.

"Miss Davies?"

I turned around to find Eliza smiling shyly at me. "Hey Eliza," I grinned and stopped what I was doing. "Come in," she stepped in and clutched at her bag, "everything okay?"

"Huh? Oh, yea…" She laughed a little and cleared her throat, "I was just wondering if I could take home a guitar?"

"Sure." I smiled and made my way out of the office, picking up the sign-out sheet. "You'll have to sign here and make sure you bring it back with you tomorrow."

"Okay." She smiled and scribbled her name on the sheet. "Thanks." She was about to turn around when she was ran into by someone else.

"Oh shit," Jaiden breathed with a frown and knelt down by Eliza, "I-I I'm sorry, I wasn't watching where I was going." She blushed and looked up at me, scowling as I smirked.

"It's okay, I'm not broken." Eliza smiled softly and stood up, wiping off the back of her jeans.

"You play guitar?" Jaiden asked with a hint of surprise in her voice.

Eliza bit her lip and shrugged. "Not really."

"Doesn't mean she can't take one home and play around." I offered.

"If you um," Jaiden smiled at the raven haired teen, "if you ever need help you can call me?"

Eliza grinned. "Thank you," she shifted her bag, "I have a bus to catch but thanks Jaiden."

Jaiden and I both watched her walk away with a guitar in hand. "Wow," she breathed, "she said my name."

"Yeah." I nodded and went back to the office to grab my briefcase. "Jaiden have a girl crush? What happened to Samantha Taylor?"

"Old news, keep up." Jaiden waved her hand. "Hey, my parents wouldn't give me the car this morning, are you going to Rapture?"

"I'm going to pick up the girls up at Spencer's first, did you need a ride?" I asked.

"If you wouldn't mind." Jaiden grinned. "You're the best Miss Davies."

--

**Next time in Points Underneath:**

_"You know what else isn't fair?" Jaiden piped in again, leaning forward, "it was bad enough that Spencer has to be 'Coach Carlin' but now Ashley has to be 'Miss Davies', what the hell kind of shit is that?"_

_"You're making our girls rich." I whispered as Lucas and Dylan sat there with their hands open and expecting._

_"Here," Jaiden shoved a ten dollar bill in Lucas' hand, "now I have eight more times that I can say a bad word."_


	67. The Great Detective Carlin

**_Your THIRD and final update of the day! Enjoy!!_**

**51 - The Great Detective Carlin**

**Spencer's PoV**

"Mom, are we going to be able to see Uncle Aiden and Aunt Kyla this Christmas?" Lucas asked, eating an apple in the back seat.

"Of course," I smiled and parked in the driveway.

"Who are Uncle Aiden and Aunt Kyla?" Dylan asked, as we scooted out of the Blazer.

"Aunt Kyla is mom's best friend." Lucas grinned, "Uncle Aiden is her husband."

"Oh." Dylan shrugged and grabbed her small backpack. "I have homework Spencer, can you help me?"

"Of course sweetie." I smiled and the three of us made our way into the house. I hung up my coat and sluggishly made my way up to my bedroom. I stopped at the doorway and grinned as the bed that was usually made every morning, remained messy.

Two sweaty, tangled bodies made love in that bed the night before. I closed my eyes and shivered.

"Mom?" Lucas poked my hip and grinned when I yelped. "Did you forget to make your bed this morning?" She raised an eyebrow.

"Huh?" I laughed and quickly throw the cover over the bedspread, patting down the pillows. "Oh uh yea, I missed the alarm."

"Oh," her grey eyes gleamed back at me mischievously, "I heard it go off." She stifled her giggles at my horrid expression.

"Well yea, but then I fell back asleep." I cleared my throat and blew strands of hair from my eyes. "I'm going to change Lucas, please grab your homework and get started?"

Lucas saluted me and skipped out of my room, closing the door behind her.

I threw myself back on my messy bed and let out a long sigh, the events of the night before and the day I had had, wearing thin on me. My eyes closed and soon I was lost in a world of Ashley-filled dreams.

I woke up to darkness. "Shit," I muttered and quickly changed my clothes. The house was eerily quiet and I found both girls' bedrooms empty and untouched. Downstairs was pretty much the same way.

I found a note placed neatly on the breakfast bar.

_**Spence,**_

_**Told you that a nap was going to be needed. I took the girls to Rapture and don't worry, I made them bring their homework – much to their whining.**_

_**See you later, gorgeous.**_

_**xo Ash**_

Did I mention how impossibly in love I was?

I clutched the note to my chest and smiled.

A knock at the door made me jump slightly and I rushed to open it. "Hey Carmen."

"Hey." Her smile wasn't as bright as it usually was.

"What's wrong?" I frowned.

"Sam left me." Carmen hung her head and I raised an eyebrow.

"Shit I'm sorry." I pulled her into a hug.

"Yea, she went to New Zealand for a week and I couldn't even convince her to stay." She mumbled into my neck.

"So she didn't leave you, leave you?" I pulled back, quirking an eyebrow.

"What?" Carmen finally let out a laugh. "Girl, if you would've given me the chance to show you how good in bed I am then you would know why Sam wouldn't leave me."

"Bitch." I pushed her away. "And here I thought you meant she broke up with you!"

"Ha." Carmen smirked and shrugged. "Still, I'm sad Carlin, make me feel better."

"Fuck you." I grinned and shook my head, grabbing my coat. "Hungry? I've got three gorgeous dates waiting for me at Rapture."

"I already ate but I wouldn't mind keeping you company." Mandez grinned and stepped outside. "So what did you do for your date last night?"

"Went to My Place." I smiled and started the Blazer, letting it warm up. "Then she took me to her place and then we came back to my place…" I stopped as she frowned with confusion. "Did I lose you?"

"So you were at your place then went to her place then back to your place?" Carmen looked so lost.

I laughed and shook my head. "My Place, the restaurant."

"Oh!" She smacked her head and shook it. "Wow, see my brain was left back in my head which is at the hotel room between Sam's legs."

"Oh God." I chuckled and frowned. "Please, I don't need those images in my head."

"Oh come on admit it, they're totally hot images." Carmen smirked slowly, waggling her eyebrows.

"Definitely not as hot as my head between Ashley's legs last night." I licked my lips.

Carmen paused and thought about it. "Yea, that would be pretty hot." I laughed and she nudged me. "Just drive Carlin."

--

**Ashley's PoV**

"Mom!" Lucas smiled as Spencer walked into the café with Carmen by her side. "I did all of my homework."

"Good girl." Spencer grinned and leaned forward, kissing her daughter on the cheek. Her eyes found mine and she smiled, blinking slowly. "Did you give out a lot of homework today?" She questioned me.

"No." Jaiden sat down beside me and fanned herself, looking a little flushed. "This Christmas rush is a bitch, you know that? I mean, is everyone so lazy to go home and cook dinner for themselves after or before shopping?"

"I'm sorry, did you want us to leave?" Carmen raised an eyebrow.

"No." Jaiden mumbled.

"How was your first day?" Spencer sat beside me and her fingers found mine underneath the table and squeezed briefly.

"Good." I smiled with a nod. "I know I'm going to love it."

"You know what else isn't fair?" Jaiden piped in again, leaning forward, "it was bad enough that Spencer has to be 'Coach Carlin' but now Ashley has to be 'Miss Davies', what the hell kind of shit is that?"

"You're making our girls rich." I whispered as Lucas and Dylan sat there with their hands open and expecting.

"Here," Jaiden shoved a ten dollar bill in Lucas' hand, "now I have eight more times that I can say a bad word."

"No," Lucas frowned, "you have four more times."

"No way, I gave you ten dollars!" The teen argued.

"Yea but there are two of us," Lucas sighed and raised an eyebrow; "eight divided by two is four - because you have to give us each a dollar, right?"

Spencer smirked and winked at Lucas, who beamed proudly. "She so has my brains."

"Yea well your brains are shit. Shit. Shit. Shit." Jaiden muttered and stood up. "There, four times and my dues are paid."

"Hope it was well spent." Lucas snickered loudly watching Jaiden walk away and she handed Dylan the money. "Buy yourself something pretty."

"Aww thank you, Lukey!" My daughter grinned and handed me the money. "I don't wanna lose it."

I tucked it into my pocket and patted it. "It's safe."

"Were you guys here long?" Carmen asked, reaching over to steal a fry off my plate. She looked at me and shrugged, winking.

"Not really." Dylan answered her. "We went to Walmart first and mommy got upset because it was crowded and people are stupid."

"Yea, she said that place makes people stupid." Lucas chuckled.

Spencer turned her head to look at me and with an amused grin and I blushed a little bit.

"Well it does." What a comeback Davies.

"Someone a little cranky?" Spencer raised an eyebrow and squeezed my thigh, biting her lip.

"Someone didn't get much sleep last night." I muttered.

"Someone should take care of that." Spencer murmured.

"_Someone _missed her alarm this morning." Lucas threw in there and both Spencer and I shared a look. "Right ma? That's what you told me." Lucas' grey eyes bore into my own with a sense of challenge.

"Yea, that's what I said." Spencer laughed nervously and Carmen smirked.

"Darn alarms, they ruin _everything_." Carmen chuckled.

"Hey Ash," Lucas was still focused on me, "do you know how to skate?"

"Uh," I frowned and shrugged, "I can stand on two feet with skates on."

Lucas' grin turned into a total mischievous Spencer smile. "Great, so you can skate with me Saturday morning."

Spencer looked at me and shrugged, not understanding where her daughter was going with it.

"Whatever you want, Luc." I nodded, somewhat baffled with the turn of events.

"Good." Lucas paused and smirked. "It's a date."

--

**Next time in Points Underneath:**

_"Why I do believe you are getting fresh with me Miss Davies." I winked and kissed her a little deeper that time._

_"Oh no!" Ashley pulled back and shook her head. "I'm not about to have sex in this room."_

_"What?" I laughed and raised an eyebrow at her. "You think I was about to have sex with you?"_

_Yes._

_It totally crossed my mind._


	68. Ten Feet Off The Ground

**52 - Ten Feet Off The Ground**

**Jaiden's PoV**

Friday afternoon and I had no plans for the evening. I slammed my locker door shut and made my way towards the music room, hoping I'd catch Ashley before she left. I hoped she had plans with Spencer because I could use the girls' company.

"Hey Jaiden." I whirled around to find Eliza standing by the music door with her drumsticks twirling around in her hand. "Waiting for Miss Davies?"

"Yeah." I breathed and bit my lip, trying not to stare at her perfectly freckled face and gorgeous eyes.

Ugh.

I was reducing myself to mush.

Well, it was technically _her_ fault.

Standing there looking like _that_.

"She's just on the phone," my raven haired beauty smiled shyly and let her bag slip to the floor while she leaned against the wall more, "I was uh, just grabbing a guitar."

"Oh? Me too." I smiled and leaned against the other side of the door.

Liar. I already had one.

It was a gift from Spencer and Lucas.

"I thought you told Miss Davies you could bring in your own if she was short handed?" She quirked a teasing eyebrow and smiled innocently when I coward backwards.

"Right." I swallowed and nodded. "So you pay attention in class."

"With a teacher like Miss Davies, wouldn't you?" Eliza blushed slightly and looked away.

So I had a chance.

"Definitely." I nodded and laughed, trying to ease the tensions of embarrassment.

We stood there silently for a few minutes before Ashley opened the music room door, surprised to find the both of us standing there. "Oh, girls, come in." She followed us into the big room and smiled.

"I was hoping I could sign out the guitar for the weekend." Eliza bit her lip.

"Of course." Ashley laughed softly and then averted her eyes to me. "And let me guess, you want a ride to Rapture?"

"Actually mom was pretty cool this morning and let me drop her off at work so I could take the car." I grinned. "I was hoping Lucas and Dylan were free tonight."

Ashley had a surprised look on her face. "I think so, why?"

"I miss those brats." I shrugged and sat down in a chair, subtly checking out Eliza as she bent over to pick up the drumsticks she dropped.

"Well I think Spencer is coaching a game of theirs tonight." Ashley closed her files and shoved them in her briefcase. "But you're more than welcome to come to the game and hang out with them afterwards."

"You and Spence have no plans afterwards?" I asked, wiggling my eyebrows suggestively.

"Jai," she sighed and rolled her eyes, "not everything is about sex with us."

"No," I agreed, "but most things are about sex with Spencer when it comes to you." I shrugged. "Just because I'm not seen, does not mean I cannot hear. I have two lesbians as parents and it's a known fact with those three, well four including Carmen, that sex is pretty much all they talk about."

"Really?" Curiosity got the best of her and she sat down beside me, leaning forward and waiting for me to continue.

"Gross, I'm not going to tell you what they say." I pushed her lightly away and laughed.

"Yea well it's gross that you actually eavesdrop on your parents." Ashley smiled and stood up.

"I picked the same guitar," Eliza interrupted us softly, "I need to run before I miss my bus and if I miss my bus, I'll be walking until after dark before I get home."

"Where do you live?" I asked, mostly out of concern of course.

"Out by the jail." Eliza shrugged and clutched her things closer to her, looking at the clock before making a quick exit after throwing out a quick 'see ya'.

Ashley looked at me and I looked back at the door.

"Catch you later." I yelled before running down the hallway to meet up with Eliza.

"Hey," I said, grabbing her arm softly. My eyes flickered to hers and she swallowed. "Look, I could totally make up a lie and say that I live out there or I was on my way out there anyway but then I'd make an ass out of myself like I did with the guitar line-"

"Would you like to teach me how to play this thing?" Eliza interrupted me with a silly grin yet totally catching me off guard. "I mean, I have the main chords down but I don't know if I'm 'guitar' worthy after playing drums my whole life."

"Uh yea…," I smiled and nodded, "sure."

"Cool." She smiled and bit her bottom lip, her eyes watching her bus go by.

"So do you have plans tonight?" I sighed and scratched the back of my neck nervously.

"No." She said softly.

"Do you like hockey?" I asked again.

"I've never played but watching the game is pretty cool."

"Did you want to join me tonight in watching nine to eleven year olds kick ass on the ice?" I grinned when her smile widened, nodding. "Good, then afterwards I can take you home."

"You don't mind?" She asked unsure.

"I wouldn't have offered." I smiled and grabbed her backpack, carrying it outside for her.

"Jaiden?" Eliza snickered. "That guitar line was pretty lame."

I rolled my eyes and groaned embarrassedly. "I know."

--

**Spencer's PoV**

"It should totally be illegal to have you teach at a high school full of over-hormonal teenagers." I pouted as Ashley finished unpacking the last of her bedroom box. Aside from some of her major appliances and other few boxes, she was moved into her new house and it was looking a little more like… home.

"It's not like I go to school dressed in short mini-skirts and tight sweaters." She rolled her eyes and threw a pair of socks at my head.

"Oh right, that was you twelve years ago." I teased and tossed the socks into her drawer.

"You didn't complain." Her eyes gleamed and I chuckled. "Besides, you happened to love those miniskirts."

"I did." I nodded without argument.

"Hey," she turned around and grabbed my hand, pulling me towards the hallway, "I wanted to wait until I had it all finished but since you're here now I figured it would do no harm to show you." We stopped at a closed door and I tilted my head to the side, wondering how I managed to miss it before. Engraved in a blue wooden plaque were the initials 'L.E.C.'

"Ash…" I said in awe and she just smiled, turning to door knob and opening the door to the small room. The light flicked on and I found myself standing in the middle of an empty room with walls that had sketches from the floor to the ceiling of Lucas' artwork. "Ashley…" I turned to look at her in more awe as she stood blushing in the doorway, acting shy and nervous. "This is…" I couldn't even find the words.

I was speechless.

"Do you think she'll like it?" Ashley whispered, looking around the room, moving in more.

"She's going to freak." I smiled with a nod, an excited nod.

"Freak?" Her eyes turned worried and I cupped her face.

"A good freak." I ran my thumb across the smoothness of her cheek. "How did you do this?"

"Uh," she laughed a little and clasped her hands together, "funny thing, I bumped into um, Carmen while the thought of how I wanted to do this room ran through my head."

"Carmen did this?" I whispered. "When?"

"The last couple of days. I mean, she had nothing better to do with Sammy being away, so I thought, why not?" Ashley smiled and moved to place a hand over the far wall, outlining the perfect outline. "Back in high school, I remember you mentioning how much Carmen loved to paint so…"

"Oh wow." I took another look around the room. "Ash, baby, Lucas is going to love this!"

"I hope so," Ashley grinned and shrugged, "Dylan promised me she wouldn't be mad and she gave me the sketches she thought were more Lucas' favourite."

I shook my head and hooked my pinky in her belt loop, pulling her close to me. "You are unbelievable, you know that?"

She smirked and raised an eyebrow. "So you've _screamed_." She batted her eyelashes playfully and I smirked, kissing her softly.

"Why I do believe you are getting fresh with me Miss Davies." I winked and kissed her a little deeper that time.

"Oh no!" Ashley pulled back and shook her head. "I'm not about to have sex in this room."

"What?" I laughed and raised an eyebrow at her. "You think I was about to have sex with you?"

Yes.

It totally crossed my mind.

"Well I know your kisses Spencer!" Ashley challenged and stepped away from me. "No quickies in this room."

"Fine," I sighed dramatically, "take me to your bed."

"No." Ashley laughed and I gasped. "What? The girls are getting dropped off in an hour and-"

"Fine." I pouted and then lit up the room with my brightening smile. "This is a really sweet gesture you did for Luc, baby."

Ashley cleared her throat and blushed. "Really? You really think so?"

"Yes." I laced my fingers with hers and hugged her gently. "Thank you."

"For what?" She whispered, pulling back.

"For just… all of this." I smiled and squeezed her hand. "Come on, let's go finish unpacking more boxes."

Sunday would be the day Dylan was moving in with Ashley officially.

"You really think she-"

"She'll love it." I confirmed with a nod.

Ashley took a deep breath and looked at the bedroom one last time, smiling proudly. "Okay," she whispered with a nod and turned off the light, closing the door behind us.

Her uncertainty was adorable.

It really made my heart swell knowing that Ashley was thinking of Lucas and what she would like. She was really trying and what made it more special was the fact that she didn't have to try – it was all so natural to her.

I began to think about what Ashley had been through the last couple of years. What was she feeling? What was she thinking? How did she cope with the pain of losing her daughter?

It wasn't a time to ask those but I knew one thing for sure, Ashley was a lot stronger than she ever allowed others to see. She had to have been a great mother before Dylan was taken away. I had no doubt in my mind.

"I'm proud of you." I said out of nowhere and it made her stop dead in her tracks. Her body slowly twisted so she could look at me with a hint of surprise on her face.

"What?" Ashley whispered.

I took her hand and pulled her against me, my lips brushing against hers softly. "I am proud of you Ashley Avery Davies."

Her eyes met the floor between our feet and her shoulders slumped a little. "I don't know what I did but thank you."

I laughed lightly and tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. "You are really amazing, you know that? So modest when you should be flaunting everything you have to offer. An amazing job, a beautiful little girl and a chance to start over."

"I don't think I could be this strong without you by my side, Spencer." Ashley confessed in a soft whisper. "You've pretty much been my rock this whole time."

"You got through your program okay without me," I offered quietly, "you're stronger than you give yourself credit for Ashley."

Ashley smiled and cupped my face, her fingers dancing over my ears. "Stop making me blush, Spencer Dylan Carlin."

I grinned and kissed the tip of her nose. "Never."

--

**Next time in Points Underneath:**

_"Lucas, you should be in bed nice and warm." I laughed softly and she shrugged, dropping the skates and sitting in the snow._

_"I couldn't sleep anyway." Her grey eyes were bright as her smile threw light into the air. "When I'm way too excited about something, it keeps me up. Mom says that I need to try and break the habit before I get older or it could get worse."_

_I nodded and offered Lucas a sip of my hot chocolate, which she gratefully accepted and thanked me for politely. "I'm the exact same way."_


	69. Fluttered Heart

**53 - Fluttered Heart**

**Ashley's PoV**

It was early morning and the sun was just starting to say good morning to the world as it rose over the horizon slowly. It was cold out but it felt nice. I stood on Spencer's dock and gazed out at the foggy clouds streaming over the icy river.

I sipped on my hot chocolate and grinned at the thought of telling Spencer I was up way early and out of bed willingly without having sex all night. She wouldn't believe me or be stubborn about believing it. Spencer was probably just starting to crawl out of the warmth of her bed while I was out of my bed over an hour ago.

I had finished the remainder of the school week smoothly and successfully gained friends in students and the rest of the staff. It was starting to piece together slowly and I couldn't be happier and if I had to be honest with myself, I couldn't help but be proud as well.

Dylan landed in a very great home and even though I had questions for Mr. C, I had to thank him for keeping his promise to Alex and getting my daughter into a great home. Dylan hadn't felt like talking about the bad homes she was put in before being transferred into Spencer's care and I didn't push her to tell me. I just assured her that when she did want to talk about it to not be scared because I would listen to every single word she had to say. She had smiled and thanked me.

I heard footsteps coming down the snowy stairway and down to the dock. I expected to turn around and see my blonde giving me a raised eyebrow grilling me about why I was out so early and in the freezing -32 Celsius weather, but instead I turned to find the shorter version of Spencer smiling at me with two pairs of skates tucked underneath her arm.

"I was going to the bathroom when I noticed you were sitting down here," Lucas smiled, her nose already red from the cold wind.

"Lucas, you should be in bed nice and warm." I laughed softly and she shrugged, dropping the skates and sitting in the snow.

"I couldn't sleep anyway." Her grey eyes were bright as her smile threw light into the air. "When I'm way too excited about something, it keeps me up. Mom says that I need to try and break the habit before I get older or it could get worse."

I nodded and offered Lucas a sip of my hot chocolate, which she gratefully accepted and thanked me for politely. "I'm the exact same way."

"You couldn't sleep?" Her eyes danced with curiosity.

"I did sleep." I shrugged and looked out as the sun inched its way higher very slowly above the frozen lake's horizon. "Why are you excited for today?"

"I wanted to skate with you." Lucas blushed and adjusted her beanie hat more securely over her smaller ears. "I grabbed mom's skates because I figured you two wear the same size."

We do.

"Thanks, Luc." I smiled and picked up the skates, looking at them. "How old are these?"

"Pretty old," she shrugged and chuckled, "but she wears them all the time when she's skating out here. They're sharpened and mom would kill me if I touched her good ones she uses for practices. No one touches those, not even Aunt Carmen."

That last statement said a lot about Carmen and Spencer's friendship. They were extremely close, maybe even closer than Spencer and Kyla had ever been, but they still liked to compete when it came to hockey.

I watched as Lucas tore off her boots quickly and started to put on her own pair of skates. It still amazed me just how much she looked like Spencer, a small clone. She was done in thirty seconds flat and then stood up, testing to see if they were tight enough. "Ash!" She chuckled, looking at me, "are you going to get those on or what?"

I laughed and shook my head, taking off my gloves and kicking off my own winter boots. I fumbled a bit with sliding the skates on, my fingers becoming frozen fast. I felt Lucas shift and she knelt down in front of me, biting her gloves off and taking the ties to my skates, tying them up tightly with a grin. "Uh, thanks." I blushed.

"It's okay rookie." Lucas giggled and put her gloves back on.

I stood up shakily and tried my best not to look like a complete dork on the skates – especially in front of an eleven year old.

Lucas started to skate on the ice, her eyes trained across the lake as she did a few quick stops. I swallowed and made my way carefully over to the middle of the ice and she finally looked at me, smiling. "It's okay that you don't know how to skate. It does make me wonder how Dyl is such an expert though."

Me too. Seemed it was in her blood or something but she taught herself to skate, I was just someone to help her balance every now and then when she was younger. "She's a natural."

"Ah," she nodded with a grin, "the best kind actually." Lucas slowly made her way towards me as I stood still on the skates, not trusting myself to balance if I moved. "You know, I've never seen my mom this happy before."

I eyed her suspiciously as she started to skate around me in circles. Her grey eyes danced along with the small snowflakes that started to fall lightly around us. "Never?"

She shrugged and switched to skating backwards around me, her eyes never leaving mine. "Katie was never good at making her smile, you know? Katie was my mom's ex-girlfriend and I don't think she ever liked me. I barely remember her but that's okay."

"Luc," I furrowed my eyebrow but she chuckled and shook her head.

"I know, Ashley." Finally she stopped skating around me and just stood there a foot in front of me. I looked down at her and she squinted a bit, her long eyelashes catching the small snowflakes. "I saw you two the other morning; you were kissing."

"Oh." I swallowed and smiled nervously, feeling as if I were caught by Paula kissing her daughter.

Lucas tugged on my coat and I hunched down to be eye level with her. She placed her hand on my shoulder and squeezed softly. "What do you have to say for yourself?" She asked seriously but her eyes twinkled playfully.

"I love her, Luc." I said quietly knowing she meant it teasingly but feeling the need to be honest. There was no use in denying it anymore.

"Oh." Lucas chewed on her bottom lip. "I wasn't expecting that." Her small face broke out into a big smile though. "You love her a lot?"

"Yeah," I breathed, releasing a sigh with a bashful smile. I had just poured my heart out to Spencer's daughter in four words. Four words that I couldn't take back nor did I want too.

"You break her heart and I'll break your nose." Lucas whispered softly. "I'll send Aunt Carmen after you too, are we clear?"

"Crystal." I smiled and she pulled me into a hug.

"Can I tell Dylan?" She pulled back wide-eyed.

"How about we wait for a bit, kay? I just really want to make sure your mom and I are heading in the right direction first." I nodded and she understood, saluting me. "Now, can I get out of these skates?"

"No." Lucas laughed and I stood up, holding her shoulders for balance. "If you're going to be with my mother, you need to know how to skate."

"I can skate." I said firmly, completely lying of course. I could… just not really.

"Really?" She raised an eyebrow and skated backwards to make room for me. "Prove it."

The minute I pushed one foot in front of the other I found myself on my ass.

"Thought so." Lucas giggled and helped me back up.

"Do you know how to play piano?" I asked, wiping the snow off my backside.

"No." Lucas shook her head and frowned. "But it'd be awesome to learn."

An idea struck me and I chuckled. "I've got an idea," I straightened my hat out and patted my gloves together, "how about I teach you how to play piano and you teach me how to skate."

"Really?" Her eyes lit up. "Awesome! Yes!"

"There's a catch." I smirked. "No telling your mom."

"Are you saying I keep a secret from her?" She gasped, placing a gloved hand over her heart.

"A harmless one." I nodded. "Trust me, she'll know about it, just not yet."

Lucas eyed me up before holding out her hand. "You've got a deal…" she smirked and licked her lips, "…mom."

And cue the heart flutters.

--

Spencer finished doing her morning dishes and joined me at the table with a warm sleepy smile. "I could still sleep a few more hours." She clutched her coffee mug close to her chest.

I laughed and patted her head, her blue eyes seeking mine. "Go back to bed then. I'm sure the girls will be content with me."

"Oh I know," she shrugged and rubbed her face lightly with her hands, "I just won't be content without you."

"I still can't believe you slept in this late." I smirked and looked at the clock on the oven. **9:07am**.

"I was having naughty dreams." Spencer grinned with a smile, closing her eyes. "You were everywhere." She whispered.

"Spence," I laughed quietly, looking around to see if there were any children ears around, "stop that."

She shrugged and winked, taking another sip of her coffee. Her head snapped left to find Lucas standing in her winter coat and ski-pants, holding a hockey stick as she watched Dylan tie up her boots. "I want you two back inside before noon for lunch."

"Yes ma'am." They replied and rushed out the door, but not before Lucas ran over towards me and kissed me on the cheek.

Spencer raised an eyebrow and leaned towards me. "What was that?"

"What?" I snickered.

"Lucas just got fresh with your cheek." Her blue eyes sparkled widely.

"Oh yea," I nodded and grabbed her coffee, taking a sip, "about that…" I swallowed and looked around the room, "she knows."

"She knows?" Her head tilted to the side and she frowned slightly.

"About us, Spencer. She knows that…well… I told her I loved you." I shrugged and stood up, grabbing my own mug from the cupboard.

"Wait, you what?" Spencer grabbed my wrist softly and I turned around to meet her eyes. "She knows about us? You told her you loved me?"

I nodded slowly and studied her face. She didn't look upset but she wasn't smiling either. "She saw us the other morning kissing," I looked away briefly, "I just told her the first thing that came to mind when she confronted me this morning."

"That you love me?" Spencer questioned softly and I could see the grin start to curl up on the left side of her cheek.

"Yes." I nodded.

"She… she didn't freak?" She whispered, bringing me closer to her body. Her eyes flickered down to my lips and then slowly back to my eyes before she kissed me so softly I could barely feel it.

"She threatened to break my nose if I ever broke your heart." I murmured against her lips that were softly pressed against mine.

"I'll send Carmen after you." Like mother like daughter. Spencer giggled quietly and I felt myself being lifted onto the counter, her lips harder against mine. Her hands squeezed my thighs as she stepped between my legs, her tongue grazing my bottom lip before pulling back. "I love you too," she whispered back, breathing slightly heavier than a few seconds before.

And cue more heart flutters.

Damn those Carlin women.

--

**Next time in Points Underneath:**

_Dylan rolled her eyes and sat on my bed, reaching over at a picture frame that was sitting on the night stand. "Aww, it's me and you!"_

_"Best friends forever," I climbed up on the bed and hugged her, "your mom is the best."_

_"Your mom is." She grinned and placed the frame back down. "Luc? Do you think we'll all live together?"_


	70. Surprised Is Served

**54 - Surprise Is Served**

**Lucas' PoV**

I hated going to other peoples places for dinner. Unless it was Chase and Ephiny's house, then I really didn't mind.

One time, my mom had an important business meeting and she wanted to impress whoever it was, so I had to wear something 'nice'. Nice for me was a pair of ripped jeans and a jersey. That wasn't 'nice' enough so she picked out my clothes for me. I was ten years old and quite capable of picking out my own clothes!

But she had taste.

I could wear a pair of jeans as long as they weren't ripped or holy and I wore a nice blue sweater that she had ironed for me. My hair was brushed back up in a ponytail neatly and I plastered a 'nice' smile on my face. We went to an older married couple's house and they didn't have any toys to amuse me. Being the good daughter I was, I stayed at the table while the older people went on and on about mom's job.

It was all French to me. And I was smart in French class – my mom threatened to put me in Saint Marguerite Bourgeois, an elementary French Immersion Catholic school across the town. I told her I'd never speak to her again if she did that.

She never did.

One, I hate French.

Two, I don't believe in a Catholic God.

Three, I would not have been there to take care of Dylan.

"Stop kicking the dashboard, Luc." Mom looked at me as we pulled out of side road and onto the highway. "I don't see why you're making this a big deal."

The big deal was mom said she had another important dinner she needed to go too. She was dragging me along and wouldn't allow me to stay with Jaiden or at Hadley's house. She wouldn't even tell me where we were going. "Why won't you tell me where we're going?" I challenged back, sitting with my arms crossed over my chest like the typical eleven year old that I was.

"Lucas." Her voice was stern and I frowned. "I wanted it to be a surprise," she finally sighed as we drove over Darlington Bay bridge and turned the next street over, "Ashley and Dylan invited us over for dinner."

I sat up immediately. It had been two whole nights since Dylan moved to be with Ashley and though I seen her at school and during hockey practice, to me it felt like ages. "Really?"

Mom never answered me vocally; she just nodded and stared straight ahead.

I had never been to Ashley's so it was exciting. Then I realized that I had never been to Ashley's house and that was why mom was making it a surprise.

To make me happy.

She loved to make me happy and see me smile.

I was such a self-absorbed brat sometimes.

"Oh," I whispered and chewed on my bottom lip, "I'm sorry."

"It's fine." She dismissed it and squeezed my hand. "Please be on your best behaviour?"

"Mom," I laughed, "Ashley's seen my bad side with me slamming the door in her face," and judging by the look she threw my way I wasn't forgiven for that one yet, "sorry."

"I know, you're a brilliant child and you have manners. Just use them." She smiled and out the vehicle into park.

"Why are you nervous?" I asked with a cheeky grin.

"I'm not." Mom laughed slightly and fidgeted with her hair in the review mirror, but not before turning on the interior lights so she could see herself better. "I just left the house in a rush."

I rolled my eyes. She never got dolled up for anything or anyone.

You're name would have to start with the letter 'A' and last name start with the letter 'D' for that to happen.

Wait.

Uncle Aiden used to date her.

Rephrasing that statement:

Your name would have to start with the letter 'A' and last name start with the letter 'D' for that to happen – and have boobs.

"Whatever you say mom." I feigned annoyance but was secretly loving it all to pieces.

Ashley was my step-mom!

Okay, not officially, but still!

"Holy Hannah in a handbasket!" I gasped as I stepped outside the Blazer and noticed Ashley's house decorated in Christmas lights and decorations.

My mom grinned and grabbed my hand as we made our way to the front door. I excitedly pressed the doorbell and heard Dylan scream "I'm coming!"

"Is that a way to answer the door?" Spencer giggled teasingly, hugging Dylan.

"Sorry." Dylan mumbled with a sheepish smile. "Lucas, come on! You gotta see my room!"

I grinned and threw off all my winter clothes, piling them neatly by the closet door before following Dylan's giggling. I stopped in my tracks when her room was made up of most things hockey, including a large poster of my mom hanging above her bed. "Wow!"

"I know!" Dylan bounced on her new bed. "Mommy made this a surprise and look," she pointed to the signature on the poster, "Spencer signed it!"

I chuckled and made a point to look at everything of hers that was on the wall. "There's a lot of snowboarding stuff on here."

"Oh," Dylan nodded, "Mommy snowboarded a lot."

"Seriously?" I was in awe. Ashley seemed to be able to do everything – but skate.

"Yea, she used to take me." Dylan glanced around the room, her voice growing softer. "We had this cabin in the mountains we'd go to. She would light the fire and we'd roast marshmallows and sing songs that Alex Carlin wrote."

"It's weird that you knew who Aunt Alex was before we knew about you." I murmured.

Dylan smiled but just shrugged. We were too young to really question it all and because we didn't understand it meant that it wasn't worth asking to begin with.

"Knock knock." Ashley and mom were standing at the door. "I hope we're not interrupting anything."

"No!" Dylan grinned and got up off the bed. "Like my room Spencer?"

My mom looked just as shocked as I did. Her eyes were on the poster and she glanced at Ashley. "How?"

"It was auctioned off your official site." Ashley whispered.

"Yea, it went for over two grand!" Mom gasped.

"Well it was autographed." Ashley smiled slightly and sighed. "The best two grand I've ever spent."

"You bought it?!" I screeched with a grin.

"I did just that." Ashley blew on her nails and winked at an opened mouthed mother. "Don't look so shocked Spence," she nudged her, "I told you I followed your career."

"But- I…" Mom shook her head and gave Ashley a big grin before looking at Dylan, "you have a very awesome room, Dyl. I wish it were mine!"

"You can share with me." Dylan giggled and did so even harder when my mom ruffled her hair. "Mommy, can we give Lucas her surprise now?"

I raised an eyebrow and looked at the two adults. "A surprise? For me? Christmas is still over two weeks away!"

"Come on brat." Ashley laughed and took my hand.

Ashley took my hand!

Spencer winked at me and that told me she knew what my surprise was.

"Ready?" Ashley knelt down and I looked into her eyes. They were so warm and inviting and for a brief moment I couldn't believe how mean I was to her. Even though I've apologized, I still felt bad.

"Ready Luc?!" Dylan bounced excitedly on the other side of me and I nodded looking at the door in front of me. It was closed.

My eyes wandered up the door and noticed 'L.E.C' engraved on a blue wooden plaque. "That's me." I whispered and found myself opening the door in an excited rush, stopping when the lights were already on and inside was the world's largest drawings of…

…my art work.

"What?" I whispered, eyes widening to see my drawings blown up into wallpaper size. I could feel something happening to me and before I knew it, I was crying. "Ashley!" I spun around and clung to her waist, crying with happiness because no one, no one had ever made that much of an effort to really accept and respect my art enough to really appreciate it. "Thank you."

Her fingers were playing with my ponytail and I felt her drop to her knees. "You're welcome."

She gave me a room in her home.

Her home.

"This is so awesome." I sniffled and hung onto her tighter. "You're the best step-mom in the world." I whispered into her ear before looking around at other small posters that have music notes, hockey things and-

"Ashley!" My mom gasped and took the calendar off the wall full of hot women and cars. "She's eleven!"

"Oh please Spencer," Ashley stood up, her hand on my shoulder still, "she can appreciate the fine arts of women – she is an exquisite artist after all!"

I grinned.

I really liked Ashley.

"We'll talk about this later." Mom smiled but her voice was stern. I growled as they left my room with the calendar.

Dylan rolled her eyes and sat on my bed, reaching over at a picture frame that was sitting on the night stand. "Aww, it's me and you!"

"Best friends forever," I climbed up on the bed and hugged her, "your mom is the best."

"Your mom is." She grinned and placed the frame back down. "Luc? Do you think we'll all live together?"

"What do you mean?"

"You and me, mommy and Spencer…" She bit her lip, looking hopeful.

I chuckled and pulled her into a hug. "Yea Dyl," I whispered, "I really do."

--


	71. Just Another Phone Call

**_Welcome back present Kyla! Sorry this is a SHORT update. I'll have a second one up for you later on today. Thank you and enjoy! : )_**

**55.1 - Just Another Phone Call**

**Spencer's PoV**

"_I know this isn't what you wanted to hear,"_ Kyla sighed on the other side of the line, _"Aiden didn't know the company would be flying him away a week before Christmas."_

"Don't you hate it when he's good at what he does?" I chuckled and tapped my fingers on my desk, eyeing the clock. It was just after five late afternoon and Lucas and Dylan had their school Christmas concert that evening. They stayed behind at school for last minute rehearsals, both girls singing and dancing in a few routines as 'Santa's' elves. It had been two weeks since that dinner at Ashley's and Dylan's.

Everything was going so perfect. Ashley had late percussion band practice she was teaching so I was the mother going to pick the girls up at their school, feed them and then meet Ashley back at the school before the concert began.

"_Promise me you're not upset Spence, I feel really bad."_ I could tell she felt bad.

"I promise. Lucas was looking forward to seeing Anton and Cailyn for Christmas but it's not like we can't make it for a different time." As an adult I understood just how fast plans could change. I missed the Dennison family, even Mr and Mrs Dennison. "Dylan is excited to meet your kids though. She hears about them all the time."

I had told Kyla and Aiden the whole story about how Dylan came to us and into my care. I also revealed who her parent was. Kyla freaked and fainted. Aiden however, knew about Dylan but was asked by Ashley not to say anything given the condition she was in when he found her. Apparently he honoured his promise hardcore because he never mentioned that meeting to Kyla.

She heard it from me.

"_I still can't believe Ashley has a daughter! I know you told me this over a couple of months ago, but still! I really want to meet her."_ Kyla sighed. _"But from the picture you sent me, she is a spitting image of her mom."_

"I know. Heartbreaker written all over her beautiful mini-Ashley face." I smiled like a proud mother.

And I was one.

"_She'll be wooing the women just like her too."_ My best friend laughed.

"Doubtful," I smirked, "Dylan has a huge crush on a boy named Jason, this cute blonde in her class."

"_Well then she takes after you,"_ she laughed, _"you had a crush on Troy Minor at age nine."_

"Troy had silky long hair. I was merely jealous." I argued. "Besides, I'm so gay. I'm gayer than Carmen."

"_Is that even possible?"_ Kyla's voice sounded amused. _"Did she finally give up getting into your pants?"_

I laughed out loud. "Please Ky, you know Carmen will always want me," I teased and we both shared a laugh, "actually, she has a girlfriend."

A gasp could be heard. _"You mean a twenty-four hour, seven days a week, girlfriend?"_

"Oh yeah," I breathed, "you know her too."

"_Please tell me it's not that Aimee skank you were using to scratch your itches?"_ Kyla made a gagging sound over the phone.

I winced. When had I found it okay to use someone? I briefly became that person I really disliked in high school.

What was I thinking?

I was just lucky Ashley wasn't holding it against me.

"Actually no," I looked at the clock again and knew I had only a few more minutes before I had to leave to head to Keewatin Public to pick up the girls. "Samantha Taylor."

"_Oh. My. God!"_ Kyla squealed. _"I knew it! Even in college when Sam was with Alex and we were hanging out or at your games, that weird sexual tension flowed between those two. I can't believe it took them until now."_

"Believe it." I made a face. Seeing a love-struck Mandez was weird enough as it was. "Ashley thinks it's great."

"_Spence! I'm such an idiot, I didn't even ask how things are between you two."_

I smiled. Ever since Ashley moved into her new house, we barely spent a night a part, four at most. I was finding it pointless in a way, to have us living in separate houses but you know, that adult part of me understood. Ashley needed to re-experience all of it. I was just lucky to be living it with her.

"She's amazing." I couldn't even hide the loving tone that oozed from my voice.

"_You never did stop loving her."_ Kyla simply stated. _"Is she wooing you?"_

"Oh Kyla, she's done more than 'woo' me." I half chuckled and half groaned at the images of Ashley having me writhe heavy and hard beneath her.

"_Gross!"_ She screeched with a laugh. _"I see you two are picking up right where you left off – only with two kids."_

"Yeah," I smiled, looking at the picture on my desk of the four of us in a booth at Rapture, "we're becoming quite the family."

Kyla softly laughed. _"Oh Spencer,"_ I could feel her grin,_ "if anything,"_ she whispered, _"you and Ash were always a family – it just took you over a decade to find your way back to each other again."_

--

**Next time in Points Underneath:**

_"What are you two girls up too?" Spencer offered, leaning forward to fix the point on Lucas' hat._

_"We heard there were cookies." Lucas looked at her mom as if she were crazy._

_Spencer nodded slowly and bit her lip, moving aside to allow her daughter and friend grab one each. "There's hot chocolate over there," she offered and her blue eyes lit up as Lucas and Hadley grinned, thanking her before going to grab some hot chocolate._

_"I can't believe she's growing up so fast." Spencer sulked. "She's supposed to stay young and cute forever."_


	72. Daddy Who?

**55.2 - Daddy Who?**

**Ashley's PoV**

I was late. It was Dylan and Lucas' first Christmas concert that I was about to be missing. I offered to drive Eliza home after my practice already ran late and it didn't occur to me that she lived at least twenty minutes away from the girls' school.

I parked my car and slammed my door shut, barely giving my purse a chance to fly behind me. There were kids with their parents piling into the lobby of the school and I waiting impatiently for the speed to pick up.

Then I saw her.

She had her hair swept back half-way, her gold locks framing her face and a smile brought to her lips as she talked with another woman. Her eyes finally met mine between the crowded mess and she grinned, politely excusing herself from the woman's company.

"Hey," she smiled and kissed me on the cheek, "you look a little flushed, are you okay?"

"I'm late." I stated lamely and pouted. "Is Dyl mad at me?"

"No." Spencer laughed softly and squeezed my hand, helping me fight through the smaller crowd. "And you're not late."

"You said to meet you at seven, it's fifteen after!" I raised an eyebrow.

"Yes, I said meet _me_ at seven. The girls still have a bit until they go on." Spencer opened a classroom door and I was greeted with the smell of coffee and freshly baked cookies.

"Mommy!" And Dylan.

"Hey kiddo," I giggled as she danced her way towards me in her cute little green elf costume, "lookin' pretty good."

"Thank you." Dylan smiled and hugged me. "My class baked these cookies today, try one." She handed me a sugar cookie and smiled when I nodded my approval after taking a bite.

"I'm starving." I confessed while grabbing three more. Spencer smirked and shook her head. "What? I'm hungry!"

"Slow down on the sweets and we'll get you something after the concert." Spencer chuckled and bumped me slightly with her hip.

"Dylan!" A blonde boy ran up to my daughter and whispered something in her ear before grabbing her hand and taking off towards the book shelf; hands never leaving each others.

"Well he's no girl," Spencer muttered, "but at least she's got great taste in blonde's," she blinked at me sweetly, "just like her mother."

I chuckled and nodded, pointing at her. "Good one."

"So," she leaned against the small coat rack and eyed me up and down, "how was your day?"

"Good." I nodded after swallowing the last of the delicious cookie. "I'm sorry I'm a little late though," I winced, "I had planned on being here earlier but practice ran late and then I couldn't have Eliza walk all the way home. Jaiden had to work or else I'm sure she would've been more than happy to take-"

"Ash," Spencer's voice was so soft, "it's okay. You really don't need to explain yourself."

Lucas came into the classroom in an outfit almost similar to Dylan's. "Hi Mom, hi Ashley," she grinned while holding a firm grip on Hadley's hand.

"Hi Miss Carlin, hi Miss Davies," Hadley smiled and stood there quietly.

I watched as Spencer's eyes drifted from the small pair of hands that were clasped together and to me with an amused grin. An amused grin marked with a slightly worried one.

Yes, even for me being in Kenora for short months, I could tell little Lucas Carlin was starting to grow up more and more.

Wow, I didn't like that thought too much.

"What are you two girls up too?" Spencer offered, leaning forward to fix the point on Lucas' hat.

"We heard there were cookies." Lucas looked at her mom as if she were crazy.

Spencer nodded slowly and bit her lip, moving aside to allow her daughter and friend grab one each. "There's hot chocolate over there," she offered and her blue eyes lit up as Lucas and Hadley grinned, thanking her before going to grab some hot chocolate.

"I can't believe she's growing up so fast." Spencer sulked. "She's supposed to stay young and cute forever."

"She is young and cute." I smiled and squeezed her hand. "But she's growing up nicely Spence, be proud."

Spencer pouted and sighed. "I still think she needs to stay Dylan's age."

We both turned our heads to find Dylan staring intently at the boy in front of her.

My eyes widen and I looked back at Spencer, "she's nine!"

"When was your first kiss?" Spencer asked me out of nowhere.

"What?!" Was she crazy? Dylan was not kissing that Jason-boy! Was that what she was implying? "Now is not the time for twenty-questions Spencer." I warned.

"David James," Spencer nodded, "he was my first kiss when I was eight. Of course it didn't last more than a second, but still."

I grunted and kept my eyes on Dylan. "Maria Foller," I whispered, "age nine."

"See?" Spencer patted my shoulder. "Like mother like daughter."

I raised an eyebrow and snorted. "So Luc had her first kiss already…"

Spencer squinted and pointed a finger at me. "She would've told me."

"Did you tell your mom?" I asked.

"Paula would've started to give me the sex talk at Dylan's age if I told her!" She gasped.

Okay, we were freaking each other out.

We had to stop it.

"Huh," Spencer stopped and frowned in thought, "come to think of it," she tapped her fingers on her chin, "David was the name of the last guy I kissed too."

Huh.

Funny that.

"You mean Lucas' fath-" fingers were pressed against my lips and Spencer leaned in close to me.

"Don't you finish that." She warned me and drew back slightly. "_Davies_ is the name of Lucas' father."

"Okay class!" Mrs. Houghton, Dylan's teacher, clapped her hands together. "We're going to be up in ten! Who's excited?"

Lucas and Hadley giggled as they snuck out of the classroom with their hot chocolate and down the all towards their own room.

The class erupted into giggles and cheers and began to form a line near the door.

"Come on," Spencer looped her arm through mine, "we should go find a seat."

We walked down the hall, avoiding a few glares from other parents. "Daddy Ashley," I murmured and Spencer stopped to look at me with a small smile tugging at her lips.

"What?"

"Daddy Ashley," I repeated and shrugged, "pretty good ring to it, don't you think?"

Spencer tossed her head back and laughed. "We'll stick with Mommy, how about that?"

"Sounds good to me." I laced my fingers with hers while we found a good seat towards the middle front.

--

**Next time in Points Underneath:**

_"Okay Al, what's wrong?" Glen sat on the other couch and looked at me. "You're sulking."_

_"I am not." I scowled and blew hair out of my eyes. "I was enjoying the news thank you."_

_"Yea? They were talking about how Tracey's team lost again." Glen's blue eyes gleamed mischievously at me._

_"What?" I sat up straight in panic and then me eyes narrowed when the older man started to laugh. I leaned over and punched Glen hard in the leg, causing a Charlie horse._

_"Ow, bitch!" He yelled and started to massage out the muscle. "Is it your time of the month?"_


	73. When I Grow Up

**_So since I'm feeling a tad generous, how about we have another three updates a day...day? Lol! Yes, expect two more after this one so check back! We're getting closer and closer to the end... kinda. Okay no, not really. _**

**_I don't own SoN in any way. I just own the originals. Enjoy!_**

**56 - When I Grow Up…**

**Alex's PoV**

"Would you turn that shit down?" I heard Glen say as he approached the living room in his sweats and hoodie.

I was watching a TV movie but it soon ended and I was too lost in thought to notice that the local news was now blaring through my childhood living room. "Sorry." I muttered and turned the TV off completely.

"Okay Al, what's wrong?" Glen sat on the other couch and looked at me. "You're sulking."

"I am not." I scowled and blew hair out of my eyes. "I was enjoying the news thank you."

"Yea? They were talking about how Tracey's team lost again." Glen's blue eyes gleamed mischievously at me.

"What?" I sat up straight in panic and then me eyes narrowed when the older man started to laugh. I leaned over and punched Glen hard in the leg, causing a Charlie horse.

"Ow, bitch!" He yelled and started to massage out the muscle. "Is it your time of the month?"

"Glen," Dad warned as he walked past the living room, "wouldn't touch that button if I were you."

"Yea, _Glen,_" I smirked and patted his balding head. For a man who was just over thirty, he sure lost a lot of hair fast.

"Here I thought my children were grown up." Mom stopped in the arch way. "Apparently only Spencer has that down pat."

"Whatever." Glen rolled his eyes and I glared at my mother.

"I am grown up!" I scoffed and followed her into the kitchen. "I work my ass off actually and I'm engaged!"

"Spencer worked her ass off in high school and she was engaged too." Mom pointed out and I squinted at her. "I'm not making a comparison Alexis, I'm just saying. I have a thirty something year old son sleeping on my couch while my beautiful and talented baby girl is crashing in her old bedroom. What is going on?"

"Glen's wife kicked him out of his house and I hate sleeping in my own house when no one's with me." I pouted.

Tracey was gone still. Her hockey tour started a little over a week before and it was excruciating being alone without her.

"Alex," she put down her chopping knife and looked at me sternly, "you've lived on the road for the better part of your adulthood so far, what is wrong with being in your own home?"

"Do you not want me here?" I asked, oddly feeling a little hurt.

"No, that's not what I'm saying. You know you're always welcome here but what is really holding you back?" She frowned a little, trying to understand.

Mom had been playing mediator between Spencer and I since everything fell apart. She wanted the both of us to get along like we used too but she understood the reasons behind both of us.

I didn't know how because my own reasoning was in question with myself.

"Smells good," Glen came into the kitchen and took over chopping up the red peppers, "I've got this Ma."

"Thanks." Mom smiled and winked at me. "You two let your father and I know when dinner is ready."

I pulled up a stool and picked at the counter, watching my older brother finish the peppers before moving onto preparing the pasta noodles. "How's Hannah?" I asked quietly and he stopped briefly, not looking at me but not answering me either. "Glen, I know you don't like talking about it but I'm here if you want too."

"Hannah's fine," Glen finally sighed and stopped what he was doing, "Sarah's really making this whole custody thing a bitch though. Women are so manipulative."

Hannah was Glen's five year old daughter and his ex-wife Sarah pretty much was taking my brother for everything he was worth. She had no reason; she was just that big of a bitch.

Poor Hannah was suffering through it all.

"When's the custody hearing?" I asked softly.

"Next week. I mean all I really want is for my daughter to spend time with her grandparents, you know? Is that too much to ask? I'm a great father, right Al?" He looked at me a little worried.

"Yeah man," I nodded and leaned over to pat his arm gently, "you're the best father I know."

Glen offered a smile and shrugged. "Spence would be telling me to get my ass down to that court sooner and demand at least weekend visits."

Spencer knew what to say in pretty much any situation.

"Have you spoken to her recently?" I asked quietly, picking at the counter again.

Glen shared a sympathetic look that told me he had. "She called a couple of days ago and I happened to answer. She said Ashley has a job teaching music at the high school and Dylan's all settled in with her in their own house."

I smiled. I was proud of Ashley's progress. "Are her and Spencer…"

"Happy. Very happy." Glen wasn't around much in our teen years. He found his own life in College and stayed away from the family. It was a shame though, because he'd only really met Ashley at the beginning of her stay in Midtown years ago and was introduced to her again briefly during Spencer's graduation – in that awkward moment. "Look Al, just call her. I know she said she didn't want to hear from you but please, maybe that's exactly what she's waiting for you to do."

I nodded and remained silent.

"I don't understand how all three Carlin's ended up liking women." Glen snorted.

"Four." I muttered. Five if you counted Dad.

"Four?" He raised his eyebrow.

"Mom had a girlfriend right before she met Dad." I looked at him stunned. "You never knew that?"

Glen's eyes widened. "I need to start being home more often." He shook his head and went back to making dinner.

I pulled out my more than expensive phone and scrolled through my contacts, stopping at 'S'.

**I miss you, wish we could talk.** I sent the text and moved off the stool.

I just needed a sense of familiarity.

I kissed my older brother on the cheek and made my way up to my childhood room.

My phone beeped.

**Miss you 2 Alexis. B in town in a few days. Catch up then.**

I smiled and closed my phone, placing it down beside me on the bed. I waited a few minutes before I picked it up again, scrolling through the contacts and stopped at 'S' again. I hit the talk button and swallowed as it started dialling.

"_You've reached The Carlin slash part time Davies residence, call back later because we have better things to do, obviously."_

I took a deep breath and licked my lips. "Hey Spencer, it's me. I just wanted to see how you and all your ladies were doing…"

--

**Next time in Points Underneath:**

_"You're twenty minutes late," Ashley addressed me quietly, "Jaiden, you really need to learn to respect me and this class."_

_I blinked and frowned. "I do respect you."_

_"Well showing up late for my class shows me otherwise." She tapped my music stand and stared at me briefly. "Join me in my office."_


	74. Lady Killer

_Here's your 2nd update of the day! Enjoy._

**57 - Lady Killer**

**Jaiden's PoV**

I ran down the hallways, pushing fellow students out of the way and wrenched open the door, trying to catch my breath.

The whole class turned to look at me, including Ashley, and I silently cussed before taking my seat, pulling out my music folder.

"You're twenty minutes late," Ashley addressed me quietly, "Jaiden, you really need to learn to respect me and this class."

I blinked and frowned. "I do respect you."

"Well showing up late for my class shows me otherwise." She tapped my music stand and stared at me briefly. "Join me in my office."

The class let out a loud 'oouu' sound and a few whispers could be heard. I kicked one of the guy's chairs that tried to grab Ashley's ass – she'd have to thank me later.

I walked by Eliza and she gave me a soft smile – oh how she melted me!

Ashley closed the door once I was inside and leaned against it, closing her eyes. "You really are leaving me no choice." She murmured before looking at me.

"What?" I raised an eyebrow.

"I need to call your parents to let them know that one more late and I have to give you an absent." She shrugged.

"Ash!" I frowned.

"Miss Davies." She looked at me sternly. "Jaiden," she sighed, "I can be your friend outside of school. We can go out, share ice cream with Spencer and the girls and I have absolutely no problem with you calling me Ashley then. But when we're on school grounds, you will really need to call me Miss Davies and as much as I hate it because it makes me sound old, that is the rule. You're having a hard enough time following them as it is."

"What is that supposed to mean?" I sat on her desk.

"It means that you're always late coming into my classroom. If you expect me to sit back and take it, you're wrong. You don't see the other students getting away with it and to be honest, I feel like you're taking advantage of me." Ashley looked a little hurt and she averted her eyes from me to open the door. "Now please, let's get this class started because they've been held up long enough."

"Miss Davies," I whispered, "I'm sorry."

"Don't be sorry," she brushed past me and gave me a small smile, "just please – I really don't want to get your parents involved."

I nodded and she walked back into the classroom and I stalked back to my seat.

Before I knew it, class was over and the students were rushing to get their lunches.

Ashley squeezed my shoulder on her way out and I slumped even further into my seat, kicking my music stand over.

I was only late because the car stalled half way to school.

Was I really taking advantage of Ashley's friendship?

"Penny for them?" Eliza sank into the seat beside me, holding out a Starburst. "I know how much you love the pink ones," she grinned.

"My thoughts aren't worth much," I shrugged but smiled, peeling the plastic wrap off the candy, "and thank you."

"Okay well," she stood up and threw her drumsticks into her bag, "I have something I want to show you."

"Me?" I asked and grabbed the offered hand she held out.

"Yea," she laughed and looked at me funny, "why do you look so shocked?"

_Oh I don't know, hot lady taking me by the hand and being all seductive._

"I'm not." I frowned.

"You so are," she grinned and pulled me along with her outside the classroom and into the gym.

An empty gym.

"Lize…" I raised an eyebrow and she shot me a look that told me to shut up and let her finish showing me what she wanted.

"So in the beginning of class, Miss Davies mentioned that there'll be a New Years dance party here for students. She also mentioned that they were looking for a band to play the music and what better way for the student body to get involved than by getting together a band…" Her babble was adorable.

"You want to be in a band?" I asked, smiling lightly.

"And I want you in it." Eliza's cute freckled face beamed with a tinge of blush to it. "Please."

"Wait, what?" I backed up and looked at the huge stage in the huge gym. "You expect me to play in front of people?"

"You play hockey in front of people." She deadpanned and grabbed my hands, pulling them up to her chest and looking at me with her puppy dog eyes and her perfectly shaped lips-

"Okay." I whispered, my eyes still mapping out her beautifully sculpted face.

"Okay?" She stepped back slightly surprised but had a huge grin. "Okay?!"

Huh?

Wait, did I just agree…

"You're the greatest ever, Jaid!" She threw her arms around me and I laughed at myself because I realized exactly two things that had just happened.

One – I had this girl wrapped around me and she smelled so good.

Two – I really didn't know what the hell I just got myself into.

Oh and three – I had this girl wrapped around me and she smelled so good.

"I aim to please." I stepped back with a grin and a shrug of my shoulders.

Eliza stared at me for a few seconds and smiled with me. "Thank you."

I nodded and picked up her books she had thrown across the floor in order to hug me and tucked them under my arm.

The things you do to impress a girl.

All I needed was a Lucas shaped Carlin to help me really brush up on my guitar skills.

She was a lady killer with the instrument.

Trust me, she even stole my heart a little when she played.

"Lunch?" I asked Eliza and she nodded, looping her arm through mine.

I, Jaiden Wynters, was definitely falling fast.

--

**Next time in Points Underneath:**

_"I stopped celebrating everything after I lost Dylan," she whispered finally after a few minutes, "this year has been so intense and overwhelming and I just feel like I don't deserve to be this happy."_

_I pulled back and cupped her cheeks delicately. "You deserve all the happiness Davies," I mumbled against her wet teary skin, "you really do."_


	75. All That I'm Living For

_Third and last update of the day/evening!_

**58 - All That I'm Living For**

**Spencer's PoV**

The tree was perfectly set up in the center of the large picture window. I couldn't wait until Ashley arrived with the girls after picking them up from Lucas' art program. I had the day off and was told to stay home and do absolutely nothing.

So I went out and got myself the best tree I could find. I would've loved to have Ashley and the girls come with me but I was way too excited.

Besides, the surprise on their faces will be worth it all anyway.

The stars were already showing themselves and it was just after five that afternoon.

Christmas was in the air.

Christmas and surprises.

I had a huge surprise for Ashley and I could hardly contain myself in keeping it in.

I think I may have to give her one of her many Christmas gifts early.

The stove timer went off and I rushed in the kitchen to pull out my own homemade short bread cookies. I loved making the house smell good during winter but especially at Christmas.

It made me miss home and my parents.

And I guess my siblings.

I frowned and bit my lip, pressing the blinking button on the answering machine that had been on there for almost a week.

"_Hey Spencer, it's me. I just wanted to see how you and all your ladies were doing. I know I'm probably the last person you want to hear from but I wanted you to know that I miss my big sister. I don't want to say too much over this machine but yea, I love you Spence. Give Ashley and the girls a kiss for me. Talk to you soon."_

I had to admit I missed her. She may have gone about everything the wrong way, but she still had good attentions. I mean, it all validated fine for her and regardless, she in a way brought Ashley back to me.

I was still very confused as to what to feel but I did miss my little sister. I talked to Glen a couple of weeks before and heard she was doing well with her music but quite the depressed woman.

I tried not to feel bad about it but as an older sister and as someone who actually grew up after high school – I knew I could end it all by just forgetting about everything and enjoy life as a huge family.

I still had to sleep on that though.

I heard the front door open and I literally squealed, running into the living room. All three of my girls' eyes were wide and jaws slacked. "So?" I bounced a couple of times and picked up Dylan.

"Spence," Ashley was the first to speak as she dropped her briefcase and kicked off her shoes, "this is a gorgeous tree – where'd you get one so pretty this late in the year?"

What? Late? I rolled my eyes.

Ashley had her tree up already for over two weeks. She bought hers.

I chopped my own down.

"I took a ride out Olsen Road in Pellat." I smiled proudly and put Dylan down.

"You chopped this yourself?" She asked in disbelief. "You killed a tree!"

I scoffed. "Well you bought a killed tree!" I challenged back. "Way to kill my surprise buzz, you tree killer buzz kill." I pouted.

Ashley laughed softly. "Aww," she pulled me into the warmth of her coat and placed a lingering kiss on my cheek, "I really do love the tree baby," she whispered.

Lucas and Dylan were both aware of our relationship. It was easier to just be up front with them rather than try and sneak around. Though that would've had its advantages.

"You so owe me for ruining my surprise." I warned lightly and grinned when she let out a nose crinkle smile.

"God," Lucas rolled her eyes and stepped between us, "just kiss her already." She grabbed Dylan's arm and ran into the kitchen after screaming 'cookies!'

"You better listen to her." Ashley wiggled her eyebrows and cupped my face, brushing her lips over mine lightly at first before deepening it. "I've missed you." She panted slightly as she pulled back, her brown eyes a darker shade.

"You have no idea." I whispered against her lips, my hands wrapping around her waist to pull her closer to me.

The girls would be preoccupied with the cookies for another five minutes.

I kissed Ashley even deeper than the first time and when a moan escaped her lips, we knew we had to pull back before things went too far.

"It smells incredible in here." She stepped back and pulled on her collar, airing herself from the heat we easily created.

"I baked." I murmured and bit my lip, eyeing her neck. She had a delicious neck.

"Mm," Ashley winked at me and hung up her coat before dashing off towards the kitchen.

I grabbed the milk jug from the fridge and poured us each a glass. Moments like that were precious; quiet moments between the four us and meals were the best because the comfortable silence was relaxing after a stressful day.

"Can we go outside and play?" Dylan asked after wiping her face off with a napkin.

"I have homework." Lucas pouted and rinsed out her empty glass.

"Go." I smiled and shrugged. "Tomorrow is your last day before Christmas break begins, I doubt they'll be checking too hard for homework."

I could feel Ashley's eyes burning on me. "Did you just tell them to forget their homework?" She whispered and leaned back as a happy Lucas and Dylan hugged me before dressing back up in their winter clothes.

"It gets me hugs." I reasoned and rolled my eyes. "Hey now, don't you dare start giving me that motherly tone," I smirked, "I didn't put a calendar of half naked women in my daughter's bedroom."

"Ou! There were cars too and they weren't half naked Spence, they were in bikini's." Ashley scowled. "I'll just rip the pictures out and give them to Luc on her 18th birthday."

"Good, not a year sooner." I kissed her nose and grabbed her hand, suddenly feeling the need to give her that early Christmas present yet nervous all at the same time. "I have something for you."

She followed me with a soft smile as we made our way down the large hall and into my den area. I leaned against the large oak desk and brought her close to me, my hands on her hips. "Are you okay?" She whispered.

Just slightly nervous.

"Yeah," I breathed and kissed her slowly before pulling back and reaching into a drawer behind me. I pulled out a small envelope and held it against my chest, taking a deep breath. "I want to spend this Christmas with you and the girls. I want to start fresh and just have no more doubts about where _we_ stand. I want to share everything with you, Ashley."

I bet she thought I was about to propose.

"Baby..." Her voice came out husky and she never once lost eye contact.

"I was going to wait until Christmas Eve but now that I think about it, I should give it to you now." I opened her hand and placed the green envelope onto her palm.

"Yes." Ashley smiled and I could tell her eyes were beginning to tear up.

I laughed and shook my head, "you didn't even open it!"

"I don't care. Whatever it is, yes." She whispered and stepped back, sniffling as she peeled back the tape I placed over to close it.

I hated licking the back of envelopes.

I bit my lip when her fingers picked up the rectangular shaped brochure inside. Her eyes furrowed a bit and the brochure opened with two plane tickets falling to her feet. "Spence?" She looked at me as she bent down to pick up with tickets and surveyed them.

I swallowed. "I uh, I thought maybe you and Dylan would like to join Luc and I in Midtown for New Years." I blushed.

I felt her arms wrap tight around my neck and then she was crying, soft sobs escaping her body.

"Ash? What's wrong?" I tried to pry her away from me but she held on tighter. "Baby, talk to me. The tickets are refundable if you-"

I hated seeing her cry.

"I stopped celebrating everything after I lost Dylan," she whispered finally after a few minutes, "this year has been so intense and overwhelming and I just feel like I don't deserve to be this happy."

I pulled back and cupped her cheeks delicately. "You deserve all the happiness Davies," I mumbled against her wet teary skin, "you really do."

"God." She let out a loud sigh and clung to me. "These tickets mean the world, Spencer."

I frowned in curiosity. Two tickets back to Midtown to spend New Years at my parents. It wasn't the most romantic thing but looking at Ashley right now and hearing the appreciative tone in her voice, made me wonder why it meant the world to her.

"This really goes to show that you," she swallowed, "that you forgive me. For everything."

I sighed with a soft smile, running a hand through her thick curls, "I told you there was nothing to forgive. I get it."

She looked down at the tickets and smiled a little. "I thought everyone was coming here?"

I laughed. "They were. Aiden got called away for this week and so I told Kyla not to worry about it. I also told my parents that they didn't need to fly down here either. Why not take a break from life here, and go visit the family there?" I shrugged and grinned. "By the way," I stood up and cupped her slender hips, "Aiden and Kyla will be thrilled to see you again, and to meet Dylan finally. Plus, it'd be nice for you to catch up with your family."

A look of sadness crossed her face and she let out the breath she was holding. "It's been a very long time."

"So?" I bit my lip in anticipation, already knowing the answer, but still.

"I love you." Ashley nodded and brought her hand to the back of my neck, kissing me like there was no tomorrow.

Yea.

I was taking that as a 'yes.'

_Midtown, here we come!_

--

**Next time in Points Underneath:**

_"Have fun?" Spencer asked with a smile._

_Lucas stripped out of her winter clothes, throwing her skates in the closet and bounced on my lap. "Dylan's in trouble but it was soooo worth it."_

_My eyes glanced towards my daughter and she swallowed, her eyes almost brimming with tears. "Baby Dyl, what's wrong?" I opened my arms and allowed her to crawl in next to us, Spencer wiping a fallen tear from her cheek._

_"I'm grounded." She whispered, sniffling._


	76. Baby Packs A Punch

**Hey! So **_**finally**_** I'm able to update this fic! I was getting worried when I couldn't log in or upload a doc, lol. Anyway, thank you for reviewing and/or reading! I love it as always, ask my wife. ;)**

**This is for ****_FiiERCELYBANGiiN_**** . She made me blush in her latest update, so I'm returning the favour. Check out her newest fic "Positive Tension". You won't regret it, I swear! It's just in the beginning but I have faith in her, she's fantastic and that fic is **_**hot! ... **_**So go, read! Now! Before you read this one even! Seriously...**

**59 - Baby Packs A Punch**

**Dylan's PoV**

It was fun skating on Spencer's homemade ice rink. Lucas and I did it often.

But since Spencer and my mom were on a 'date', we were with Jaiden and her friend Eliza at a local skating rink in town.

Eliza didn't skate but she tried so that was cool.

"Come on Lize, put some more leg into it. You're taking baby steps!" Jaiden laughed and Lucas giggled.

Sometimes I felt weird not being able to like a girl. I really liked Jason. Jaiden told me a story about how much she crushed on Spencer when she was about my age.

I just really liked Jason.

"Dyl!" Lucas grabbed me and whirled me around on the ice before letting go and I made a complete sharp stop before hitting the boards. We both laughed and repeated the game.

It was fun.

"Why didn't you bring your hockey stick?" I asked Jaiden when we skated over to her and Eliza, who was trying to stay up on two feet.

"Your mom called me last minute, I spazzed." She shrugged with a smile. "Did you want to go get a stick? I might have one in the back of the car."

"I'll look for it!" Lucas was the first off the ice and I continued to skate around by myself. I wandered over to the other side of the rink and paid no attention to others around me.

The snow was falling and the lights on the houses around us were bright red and green, with blue and some gold. Christmas was two days away and it felt different that year around.

Mom and I would often go to the cabin in the mountains and have our own little dinner. She didn't have any friends when I thught about it. She kept up an appearance with my school and after school activities, but she never had any friends.

Yet she always seemed happy.

Not as happy as she was when she was with Spencer.

Spencer was the best. She took me in, treated me like I was her own daughter and then she fell back in love with my mom.

Maybe I'd never really had a perfect Christmas before.

Maybe Christmas was going to be better this time.

I was thrown out of my thoughts when I felt something hard hit the back of my thigh and turned around expecting to find Lucas chucking snowballs at me.

But it wasn't her.

Olivia Olsen. She was on another hockey team that lost every time we played them.

I hated her.

She was mean.

"What do you want?" I asked, trying to skate past her.

"Where's your little girlfriend?" Olivia's dark eyes gleamed at me and I scowled.

"Go away." I tried again and she pushed me back slightly.

"I asked you a question, twerp." Olivia started to circle me and I tried to skate past her but I was tripped by her foot.

"Hey!" I heard a sharp shrill and then saw Lucas skating towards us with a hockey stick in hand. Jaiden and Eliza were right behind her. "Back off, Olsen."

"Ou, girlfriend to the rescue." Olivia was Lucas' age only slightly bigger.

And by bigger, I mean slightly uh, fatter.

"Shut up moron, she's my sister!" Lucas threw her hockey stick down and went to shove the other girl, but Jaiden grabbed her arm. "Let go, Jai."

"Aww, if it isn't the other lesbos to the rescue." Olivia laughed wildly. "And how can she be your sister? Two women can't make a baby."

"Piss off." Jaiden said casually and I felt Eliza grab my hand. "Come on Dylan, let's go somewhere else."

"Little Dylan needs her lesbians to stick up for her. Your family is a disgusting disease."

I squared my jaw and wrenched my hand away from Eliza, skating so that I was a foot away from the girl who was picking on me and my family.

"Take that back!" Lucas roared and was right beside me, her fists clenching tightly by her sides.

"Come on girls," Jaiden said, trying to drag us back, "I do not need your parents yelling at me if you get hurt."

Olivia laughed and poked me in the shoulder. "Little lesbian Davies. Sounds good, don't you agree?"

"She's not a lesbian, you asshole." Lucas hissed.

"Seriously girls. Let's go." Jaiden said sternly. "Now."

"Better listen to her, dirty twerp." Olivia sneered.

"What is your problem? I was just skating here and I wasn't even bothering you!" I yelled and shoved Olivia harder than I planned. She lost her balance and fell on her butt. Lucas laughed and I swallowed hard because the mean girl got up and stared at me with fire in her eyes.

"You'll pay for that you little…" she lunged at me and I could see Lucas getting ready to body check her.

Instead, after I blinked and a piercing scream hit the air, I realized that my fist collided with her face and Olivia was on the ground crying, holding her nose.

"Dylan!" Lucas looked at me wide eyed but with a proud smile on her face. "You totally knocked her down!"

I looked at Jaiden, who inhaled deeply and shook her head, trying to hide a smile. "Come on," she bent over to try and help Olivia up but her hand was smacked away and the girl was off the ice faster than a speeding bullet. "Dylan, I didn't know you had it in you."

I blushed but frowned.

I was going to be in so much trouble when I got home.

At least I had a killer right hook.

--

**Ashley's PoV**

A soft giggle came from her lips as we snuggled underneath the covers on the couch, after watching two movies. I nuzzled her neck and mapped out the skin from underneath her jersey she had thrown on after our long hot shower together.

"That tickles," Spencer breathed as I continued to run my fingertips over her.

"I think this is nice," I whispered, watching as she turned the volume down on the TV, "me and you, just basking in the warmth and afterglow."

"No interruptions because knowing Jaiden, she'll have the girls occupied for hours." Spencer mused and I nodded.

"I have our bags packed." I confessed. I had them packed for a few days. "I'm anxiously excited."

"Anxiously excited, eh?" Spencer raised an eyebrow and grinned, kissing my forehead, bringing me closer to her body with her arms. "I am too."

Everything felt so peaceful. I glanced at the tree we had all decorated and we agreed that we'd spend Christmas at Spencer's. Even though I had my own house, being in Spencer's felt more like home.

Maybe because Spencer always was my home.

My place felt a little empty. Especially the nights Spencer didn't stay over.

"I didn't say it was the right thing to do!" The door flew open and there walked in four girls. Jaiden shut the door and shook off the fallen snowflakes. "Oh hey guys." She said sheepishly as they spotted us curled up on the couch.

"Have fun?" Spencer asked with a smile.

Lucas stripped out of her winter clothes, throwing her skates in the closet and bounced on my lap. "Dylan's in trouble but it was soooo worth it."

My eyes glanced towards my daughter and she swallowed, her eyes almost brimming with tears. "Baby Dyl, what's wrong?" I opened my arms and allowed her to crawl in next to us, Spencer wiping a fallen tear from her cheek.

"I'm grounded." She whispered, sniffling.

I looked up at Jaiden and Eliza for an explanation and Wynters smiled softly, sitting down in a chair and grabbing Eliza to sit with her. "Dylan was defending the Carlin-Davies name," she looked at my broken daughter, "she was being picked on by some girl calling her a lesbian."

My heart hurt as Dylan tucked her face into my neck. "I'm sorry."

"What happened baby?" I asked and watched as Spencer tapped Lucas to get off of me. I was guessing they were giving us our space. The other four went into the kitchen and I gazed at Dylan.

"Olivia Olsen wouldn't leave me alone. She tripped me when I tried to skate away. She called Lucas my girlfriend and then called me 'Little lesbian Davies' and she called me dirty!" Her voice cracked and she stared at me. "It's not true, Mommy!"

"I know, baby." I whispered and inhaled deeply. "Some kids are mean and cruel."

"I hit her." She confessed and I sat up, raising an eyebrow. "Lucas was going to check her but I kind of beat her to it."

"Where were Jaiden and Eliza?" I asked, slightly confused.

"Trying to drag us away but Olivia wouldn't shut up! She hurt my feelings." Dylan frowned and wiped her eyes. "But I hit her and that's wrong. So I grounded myself."

I had to smile and run my hands through her dark curly hair. "That was wrong of you Dylan and at least you realize that. I'm not mad but you should've just listened to Jaiden when she told you to go."

"I know." She muttered and wiped her eyes again, clearing the fresh tears that were building up. Dylan rarely cried when she was younger. It also hurt that she didn't ever want to talk about what had happened to her in other homes she was in. Not yet anyway. "Can I go?" She asked softly, looking up towards her own bedroom in the Carlin household.

"Did you make her cry?" I asked, curling my finger around on of her ringlets, looking into her deep brown eyes.

Dylan nodded and bit her lip.

"Good," I nodded and pulled her close to me, hugging her. "No more fighting, okay? Walking away is the only way to show strength. Everyone can act on impulse and hurt someone but it takes a stronger person to walk away."

"Okay," Dylan nodded, "promise."

"Love you Dyl," I smiled and she grinned back. "Spencer and I made some more cookies, you want some?"

"Okay!" She hoped off my lap and I stood up, only to find Spencer standing at the door staring at me with her loving gaze.

"You are remarkable." She whispered and kissed me softly.

"I learn from the best." I shrugged and bumped her shoulder with mine, lacing my fingers with hers, walking into the kitchen.

--

**Next time in Points Underneath:**

_"It's like everyone grew up and moved on and I just kind of stayed here." _

_"What are you talking about, Alexis?" I frowned. "You're a rock star. You've got millions of women and men falling at your feet, enjoying your music. You're living the dream."_

_She snorted slightly and tiled her head, licking her lips. "What if I told you my dream from high school, turned out differently from the dream I have now?"_


	77. The Trouble With Love Is

**60.1 - The Trouble With Love Is…**

**Sammy's PoV**

It was Christmas Eve and I was sitting in a small coffee shop in the middle of Midtown. I blew into my mug a bit and turned my head when the bell on the door went off, signalling an incoming. My smile widened when I finally saw who it was.

I stood up and Alex fell into my open embrace, her face buried into my neck, holding on for dear life. "God, I missed you." She breathed and pressed her lips to my cheek, squeezing my hand.

"I've missed you too." I smiled softly and brushed a stray black hair behind her ears. She looked so grown-up, it was unreal. We both sat in our seats across from each other and shared a soft look. "You look really good."

Alex shrugged but whispered a thank you. "Not as good as you, Samantha Taylor."

"Always." I grinned and shrugged my own shoulders. "How have you been? It's been a couple of months."

Her grey eyes scanned the shop before landing on me. "I don't know. I just feel like such an asshole."

I widened my eyes at her confession and tilted my head. "Why?"

"Why do you think?" She gave me a look and sighed. "I miss them, Sam. I miss everyone and how everything used to be."

A part of my heart would always belong to the young Carlin, there was no question in that. I missed a lot of things too.

Her being one of them.

"It's like everyone grew up and moved on and I just kind of stayed here."

"What are you talking about, Alexis?" I frowned. "You're a rock star. You've got millions of women and men falling at your feet, enjoying your music. You're living the dream."

She snorted slightly and tiled her head, licking her lips. "What if I told you my dream from high school, turned out differently from the dream I have now?"

"How so?" I leaned forward and brushed my thumb against her hand before taking a sip of my coffee.

"In high school, I wanted to play music. I wanted to be famous and I wanted to make a difference in the world with music. I wanted to be Ashley. She did it all, and she wasn't even in the spotlight." Her eyes closed and she took a deep breath. "Don't get me wrong, I'm in love with the woman I'm about to marry but this wasn't how I pictured things."

"You and me?" I asked gently, raising an eyebrow.

"Yeah."

"I miss the high school Alex and Sammy. I miss the carefree Alex who did things for the right reasons and not just because _she_ thought it was right. I miss you all the same but you've become a different person." I shrugged. "I'm not saying that your difference is bad in any way babe, I just mean that we all grow up to live up to different expectations and yours was to get laid and play the rock star role."

"I did not expect to get laid!" Alex said hurtfully. "I just got caught up in the moment of being wanted."

"I always wanted you." I whispered.

"I know," she said quietly and played with the sugar shaker, "and I'm sorry."

"It's the past. We already said we'd leave it there." I smiled and bit my lip. "I have a feeling this isn't about us though, is it?"

"I want to make things right with my sister and Ash." Alex swallowed and looked at me. "I just don't know how to go about that, you know? I've messed up big time and I realize that. I made so many mistakes along the way that I don't blame them for not wanting to talk to me."

"They do." I nodded and stared into my coffee. "Carmen says that Spencer always talks about wanting to call you but she needs to do it when she's ready. With this being Christmas and all, I'm sure she'll come around."

Alex smiled and reached over the table, grabbing my hand. "I love you Sammy, you know that right?"

"I know." I grinned. "I love you too."

"We would've been great." Alex mused, her hand still in mine gently. I pulled her around to my side and wrapped her up in a hug.

"Yeah." I whispered and looked out the window, the snow starting to fall heavier. "Come on," I paid for my coffee and pulled her outside, shivering instantly as we hit the cold air, "I think we should go to Modest Point."

Only the hottest retro lesbian 'couples only' club in all of Southern Ontario.

"Modest Point?" Alexis grinned and clapped her hands. Then she stopped and stared at me. "That place is for couples only!"

"So?" I looped my arm through hers. "Two friends who used to be lovers, can't pass as a couple?" I raised an eyebrow. "Come on Alexis!" I pouted. "I've been there once since we broke up; let's go for old time's sake."

"What would Carmen think?" She teased as we walked towards her vehicle.

"I had a hot date for the evening?" I grinned. "It'll be fun."

We shared a warm moment and she nodded, opening her passenger door for me. "Just like old times."

--

**Spencer's PoV**

I passed Lucas a present from under the tree. All of us were in our pyjamas and opening up the traditional Christmas Eve, one present only.

"Is it…" she shook the box, her dark grey eyes looking at it curiously, "a dog?"

Ashley laughed and kissed the top of her head. "I think if it were a dog, it'd have to have holes in the box so it could breathe."

"Right." Lucas frowned. "I knew that."

"Open it!" Dylan squealed and nearly hopped in Lucas' lap.

Luc laughed and shook it again before tearing open the box. "Oh my!" She stood up and bounced up and down. They were old collector hockey cards that were rare to find anymore.

I had connections.

"MOM!" She jumped in my lap and squeezed me tightly. "I love this! I love you!"

"You're welcome." I smiled and ran my fingers through her hair. "Now you keep them all together and I don't want to hear that you've lost any."

"Look Dyl," she showed them to Dylan and I looked over at Ashley, who was rummaging through the presents until she held one up.

"Dylly, did you want to give this to Spencer?" Ashley stood up and held out the small box, placing it in Dylan's eager little hands.

"What is this?" I smiled, a little surprised that they snuck in a present without me knowing about it.

"It's a box, now open it." Dylan stared at me seriously, her brown eyes looking to my fingers and at the box again when I grabbed it.

Ashley smiled and made her way towards me, sliding her arm around my shoulders. "We hope you like it."

I slowly tore off the paper and opened the small box, gasping. "Ashley?"

"Here," Dylan took the chain out of my fingers gently and crawled on the couch behind me to help me put it on. "Mommy said you'd love this."

The pendant on the white-gold chain had four birthstones embedded into it. One birthstone representing the months we were born in.

The four of us.

As in a family.

"This is beautiful," I choked out and pulled Dylan into my lap while grabbing Ashley and pulling her into a hug as well, "I love you two so much."

Dylan pulled back and wiped the tears off my cheeks and smiled. "I love you too, Spence."

"I love you too, Spence." Ashley repeated with a warm smile.

"Where's the Lukey lovin'?" Lucas pried her way through and soon we were all on the couch in a heap of laughter, hugging.

A while later, after we finished having some milk and cookies Ashley and I were ready to tell the girls about our trip to Midtown.

Dylan sat on the floor clutching at her new hockey skates and Lucas was sorting through her newest card collection.

"So," I slipped my arm around Ashley's waist, waiting for the girls to look up at us, "we have another surprise for the both of you."

Lucas raised an eyebrow and cleared her throat. "Is the part where you tell us that you're pregnant?"

Dylan covered her mouth and snickered.

I gave Lucas a hard look and she smiled while mumbling an apology. "You want to tell them Ash?"

Ashley smiled and nodded, tightening her own grip on my hip. "It was an early gift from Spencer but we're all in it together. Dylan, how'd you like to fly down to meet Lucas' grandparents and your other family?"

Lucas was the first to jump on her feet while Dylan stared in confusion. "Sis! This is awesome! You can meet Nana and Grandpa! You can meet Anton and Cailyn! Oh my lesbian God!"

Finally Dylan got it. She was hugging me and then Ashley just as excitedly as Lucas did.

"This is the best Christmas ever!" Lucas sighed happily.

I really couldn't agree more.

--

**Next time in Points Underneath:**

_I woke up to muffled laughter and a warm body next to mine. I blinked when I realized I had three pairs of eyes looking at me._

_"She's awake." Dylan whispered as if I couldn't hear or see her._

_"Time to wake up sleepy head." Lucas smiled and sat on my legs, her grey eyes sparkling. "It's Christmas morning!"_

_I grinned and stretched, sitting up and ruffling both the girls' hair. I smiled at Spencer and pulled her in for a short kiss. _


	78. Must Be

**_Second update of the day! Oi Blondie, enjoy! (Sorry, it wouldn't let me put the period between your name!)_**

**60.2 - Must Be**

**Ashley's PoV**

I woke up to muffled laughter and a warm body next to mine. I blinked when I realized I had three pairs of eyes looking at me.

"She's awake." Dylan whispered as if I couldn't hear or see her.

"Time to wake up sleepy head." Lucas smiled and sat on my legs, her grey eyes sparkling. "It's Christmas morning!"

I grinned and stretched, sitting up and ruffling both the girls' hair. I smiled at Spencer and pulled her in for a short kiss. "Why didn't you brats wake me up earlier?"

"Because you were probably up late with mom and didn't want to be bothered." Lucas blinked her innocent eyes before squealing and Spencer pushed her off my legs and tickled her.

"She has that Carlin wit." I mused and grinned. The girls screamed happily and made a bee-line towards the door, downstairs.

"Sleep well?" Spencer smiled and ran a hand through my hair, her fingers grazing down my shoulder.

"I did." I smiled and swung my legs over the bed, only to find a new pair of slippers at my feet with a bow on them.

Spencer laughed. "The girls picked them out. I have no control over what they wanted to get their Momma for Christmas." She shrugged innocently.

Momma.

_Their_ Momma.

"Sometimes I have to pinch myself to know this is real." I whispered. "Being here with you, starting a family... it just seems like it's all happening so fast. Too fast."

"Yet it took us twelve years and two kids to get here." Spencer reminded me in a soft scolding tone. "Are you happy?" She bit her lip, her hands painting patterns on the palms of my hands.

"More than you'll ever know." I leaned in to kiss her.

"Hurry up!!!" We heard the girls yell from downstairs.

"Feisty ones aren't they?" Spencer snickered and helped me stand. "You go have a shower, I'll start on breakfast and then we can get the presents out of the way before company starts knocking."

My girl was quite the hostess. She loved company and entertaining them. "I'll be down in fifteen."

"Don't go dressing all fancy." She looked at her own yoga pants and baggy sweater. "This is our Christmas morning attire."

"And yet you make that look so hot." I whispered, grabbing her by the waist and kissing her softly. "Now go make me some food woman."

Spencer slapped my ass and took off downstairs.

--

About a dozen or so presents later, I found myself being a real life model for Lucas' next sketch with the brand new set of the best charcoal pencils, erasers and sketch paper I had bought her for Christmas.

I was raking in those cool 'step-mom' points, let me tell you.

"Don't move, Ash." Lucas used her stern 'Carlin' voice and I shut my mouth closed.

Talking wasn't even an option and if she had it her way, neither would be breathing.

Carmen came around the corner and made a funny face, successfully getting me whacked lightly on the leg with Lucas' pencil for laughing.

"Carmen, stop making her laugh or I'll tell Mom." The young Carlin pouted.

"Carmen, behave." Spencer slapped her upside the head and I chuckled.

"Ugh, how can I work under these conditions?" Lucas threw her hands up in the air and ripped her paper up and throwing it behind her. She got up off her stool and made her way towards me, cupping my face and tilting my head a bit. Her fingers tucked some hair around my ears and she smiled, her grey eyes lighting up. "I can see why Mom loves you so much."

"Ditto baby." I whispered, causing her to blush.

I managed to stay completely still throughout her rough draft and let me tell you, Lucas made me beautiful. "I just need to add some colours now," she shrugged as if it were no big deal.

"That is awesome, Luc." I admired it and tucked my feet under my knees.

"You can have it once it's finished." Luc smiled and got up, running to her room to grab her other art supplies.

"I heard Spencer's taking you back to Midtown." Carmen sipped her hot chocolate and eyed me up with a grin. "Are you excited?"

"Nervous." I shrugged. "I haven't been back since…"

I never finished the sentence but she knew.

"Well this is like a fresh start," she smiled softly and patted my leg, "you can see your family, meet your new cousins – be that Ashley Davies that we all loved."

"You never even liked me." I laughed and Carmen grinned.

"Well you were macking on the girl of my dreams," she shrugged, "but somehow even if I did get to Spencer first, the moment that girl would've laid eyes on you…" she paused and scratched her chin, "yea, I would still be sitting here today as the Aunt Carmen and not the Mom."

"You liked Spencer?" Dylan turned around from her seat on the floor while colouring.

"A long time ago." Carmen ruffled Dylan's curls. "She's my sister now."

I smirked.

A sister she'd still sleep with if given the chance – not that I blamed her.

"Carmen! Dylan!" Spencer's voice rang through the kitchen and both of them hopped up as if they were in trouble and ran towards my lovely blonde.

"I have the colours I need!" Lucas came bouncing into the living room and dropped onto her knees in front of the coffee table, spreading out a rainbow of her utensils. "So can I ask you a question?" She looked at me with a soft expression.

"You can ask me anything." I nodded and sat forward, listening to what she had to ask.

"Why did you want me to teach you how to skate?" Her grey eyes shimmered with delight.

I smiled and laughed nervously. "Well," I cleared my throat, "I have an idea and frankly it's making me very nervous. I'd tell you but I haven't figured it all out yet."

"Oh," Lucas frowned and then grinned, "but when you do figure it out, will you tell me?"

"You'll be only one that knows." I winked and tucked a blonde strand of hair behind her ear. "And I have to say, you are becoming a master at the piano." I had Lucas come with me to my music classes after school to learn the instrument. She was a very quick learner.

"I've got the skills," Lucas shrugged and puffed out her chest while blowing on her nails.

"Yea, it must be that damn Carlin blood." I winked.

"Must be." She agreed.

--

**Next time in Points Underneath:**

_"How are your parents?" I called from the kitchen, kicking the fridge closed only to find Sammy in my spot on the couch while patting the seat beside her._

_"Good." She sighed and placed the bottle on the coffee table. "They bought me a pass to the gym," she rolled her eyes, "either I'm gaining weight and that's their subtle way of telling me or they couldn't think of anything better."_

_"Nah," I placed a warm hand over her sweater covered stomach, my eyes catching hers, "feels like you're in good shape."_


	79. The Phone Call

**_A third and last evening treat for you all! Alex gets an unexpected phone call._**

**61 - The Phone Call**

**Alex's PoV**

"Why do you find that so funny? So I said 'orgasm' instead of 'organism'. It happens!" I rolled my eyes and sat up on the couch, watching Sammy pick out another old vinyl record to listen too – or she was trying to but had the severe case of the giggles.

"You were in a classroom full of eight year olds and then," she held her stomach, "and then they started to ask you what an 'orgasm' was."

"I got in so much trouble from the parents. It's not funny." I smirked and threw some popcorn her way.

Sammy had spent some time with her family Christmas morning but met me back at my place for movies, like old times.

"So what time was Trace supposed to call?" She straightened out while dropping Janis Joplin on the old turn table. "God I love this woman."

I nodded in agreement and glanced above my mantle to find that it was already pretty late. "Probably first thing in the morning," I shrugged, "I bet she had a tough day and is in bed."

Samantha smiled and grabbed her bottle of beer. "Carmen called me before I came here," she threw out there with a shrug.

"Oh?" I raised an eyebrow. "Does she know you're with me?"

"I told her I was spending time with you, of course." Sammy looked at me with a smile. "As long as we don't grope each other, we're cool."

"Touché." I laughed and got up to grab another cold beer. "How are your parents?" I called from the kitchen, kicking the fridge closed only to find Sammy in my spot on the couch while patting the seat beside her.

"Good." She sighed and placed the bottle on the coffee table. "They bought me a pass to the gym," she rolled her eyes, "either I'm gaining weight and that's their subtle way of telling me or they couldn't think of anything better."

"Nah," I placed a warm hand over her sweater covered stomach, my eyes catching hers, "feels like you're in good shape."

Sammy snorted and rolled her eyes, throwing my hand off her and lifting her sweater up to look at her stomach. I quirked an eyebrow at the pierced belly button that I never even knew about.

"When did you get that?" I asked, tracing my finger around the black stud.

"About two years ago," she shrugged and patted her own belly, "I needed a change but nothing too drastic. I've already got your name tattooed on my lower back and that's as drastic as it's going to get."

I blushed. She had gotten that tattoo for me as a graduation present in high school. I had her name wrapped around a rose on my ankle.

We made a pact to never have them covered up.

"What do people say when they see it?" I whispered.

"People? You make me sound like a slut." Sammy snorted and shook her head. "They ask me who 'Alexis' is, I say that hot singer and they think I'm just an obsessed fan. They flee after I mention you're the ex-girlfriend."

"Ha," I laughed and tried to stifle it behind my hand, "I guess you're kinda stuck with me."

"Kinda." She shrugged and brought her blue eyes up to mine. "But I can live with that."

"Me too." I sighed and shifted beside her, turning to face the journalist. "I'm really happy you decided to hang out. I hate being here by myself." I shuddered.

"Why?" Sammy laughed and looked around the small yet spacious two bedroom house. "You're ten minutes from your parents place and you spent a lot of nights alone while on tour."

"This place just hasn't really sunk in that it's home, you know? Tracey and I decorated it together but I'm just taking a little bit longer to get used to it." I shrugged. "Does that make me horrible?"

"No," she shook her head and glanced around, "I feel safe here if it makes you feel any better. I'll spend the night if you want me too."

I swallowed as the alcohol I was drinking started to course through my veins and I felt my heart beating harder with every flick of Sam's eyelashes. It was like a part of me longed for that familiarity yet at the same time; I knew that I was just getting caught up in past emotions. "You don't have too."

Samantha shrugged and downed the remainder of her beer and stood up. "I think it's wise anyway seeing as I can't drive like this. I've had way too many." She winked and made her way towards the bathroom.

I collapsed on the couch and reached for my phone. "Freaky," I whispered as it started ringing and frowned at the unknown number that popped up. "Hello?"

"_Shouldn't you be out on stage shaking the thing that Mom gave you?"_

"Spencer?" I barely whispered and I heard a soft laugh flow through the line. "Wha- I mean- hi, how are you?"

"_I'm fantastic little sis,"_ Spencer sighed and then there was a pause, _"I miss you."_

I couldn't even stop the flow of tears that fell from onto my cheeks. I sat up and pressed my forehead into my hand, smiling yet breaking at the same time. "I miss you too."

"_I think this silence stuff has went on long enough. You don't know of anymore kids Ashley has that I don't know about, right?"_ It felt good to hear the teasing in her voice.

"No," I laughed softly and clutched my phone tighter in my hand, "I really am sorry Spencer."

"_Stop,"_ she said quietly, _"I may never understand it fully but I get it. Now, I have something to tell you…"_

"You and Ash are together." I grinned and bit my nail. "Sammy told me."

"_Sammy?"_ Spencer sounded a little surprised. _"When did you talk to her, I thought she was in New Zealand?"_

"She was. She's back for Christmas and she's actually grabbing yet another beer from my fridge." I rolled my eyes as Sammy sat back down beside me, flipping through more retro vinyl records.

"_Does Carmen know?"_ She teased.

"Yes, Sammy talked with her not too long ago and mentioned she was with me. Why?"

"_Well…"_ Spencer became silent again and then she laughed, _"just don't go getting into trouble you two."_

"What?" I frowned. "We're just friends."

"_So I have a surprise."_ Spencer ignored me. _"Tomorrow we're flying in for the week. I don't want anyone else to know."_

I gasped and jumped up and down. "You're coming here?!" I winced when my sister used my name in a scolding tone while Sammy raised a curious eyebrow. "Sorry."

"_Okay so don't tell anyone else,"_ Spencer laughed, _"we're catching an early flight and should land before lunch. I was wondering if you could come get us. They don't have any more cars available to rent at the airport so I'll find something in the city."_

"Oh my God, of course Spencer!" I squealed and twirled around like a little girl. "Wait, who is we?"

"_The family."_ Spencer replied softly. _"See you tomorrow Aly."_

So maybe not a whole lot of what happened was talked about but if Spencer was talking to me, then I didn't want to spoil that. We could talk face to face, like she had said she wanted to before.

I threw my phone on the table and threw myself back with a longing sigh. The fact that she called me and she trusted me with a huge secret, I felt a huge weight being lifted off my shoulders.

"Your girl coming home early?" Sammy looked at me curiously.

"No," I shook my head and grabbed her hands, "that was Spencer, Sam. She called me! She… she called me. She laughed and she called me."

Samantha had a big smile on her face and I felt her arms wrapped around my neck, her cheek pressed against mine. "That is awesome, Alexis."

--

**Next time in Points Underneath:**

_"I did." I smiled and put the cover back over the key before standing up. "I didn't know you'd be back so quickly," I made my way over to Spencer, lacing my fingers with hers._

_"I didn't know you still played." Spencer bit her bottom lip and then eyed up her daughter with a raised eyebrow and impressive grin, "I didn't know you played at all."_

_"What?" Lucas shrugged, brushing blonde hair out of her eyes, "I'm a Carlin."_


	80. Blanket of Security

**Flashbacks are in **_italics. _This flashback was taken from **Wash It All Away - Chapter 52.2: _Holding My Breath._**

I don't own SoN. I do own the small lyrics and the OC's! Oh, and storyline. Enjoy!

**62.1 - Blanket Of Security**

**Ashley's PoV**

It was supposed to be a gorgeous morning the day we were to leave for the airport. "Coffee please." I smiled at Chase who nodded with a grin.

"Where's the other three?" The blonde slid into the booth across from me, pouring me a cup of coffee.

"Spencer's picking up a few last things before we catch our flight." I inhaled the sweet aroma of the caffeine and moaned at the bitter taste. That'd definitely wake me up. "How do you do it?" I said as the clock above the large counter blinked **5:30am**.

"You keep forgetting that I have a very energetic teenager who looks forward to early hockey practices." Chase laughed and blew some hair out of her eyes. "I hope she's showing up to class on time with you now." She stared at me with a sympathetic look. "I'm sorry for the way she's been behaving."

"Oh no," I breathed and frowned, "Jaiden is one of the best students I have. She's really great Chase and yes, she's been early actually. She's working on my name still but I can't blame her. She's a close friend of the family and I see her almost every night here or at the arena. I'd get confused too."

"She respects you, Ash." Chase smiled. "She really looks up to your relationship with Spencer and I think she always had."

//

"_Spencer, Ashley," Chase was the first to greet us with a smile across her face, "didn't think we'd see you again."_

__

"Spencewr, Ashwy!" Jaiden came running up to us and smiled goofily. "Mommy says you skate!" Her eyes widened at Spencer.

I looked up at Chase, "she's got quite the memory."

"She gets that from Eph, they never seem to forget anything or anyone they meet," she smirked and leaned in, "it's a little creepy."

I shared a laugh with her before I found Spencer and Jaiden in a deep conversation about hockey. They were talking about their favourite teams and when Spencer mentioned she was hoping to play in the Olympics, Jaiden was that much more into her, crawling on her lap.

"Is Ephiny the hockey fan as well?" I raised an eyebrow.

Chase smirked, "no, she gets that from me. Jai wants to play hockey but she's a little too small yet. But she will, eventually."

"Have you evewr been slammed up against the bowrds?" The small brunette asked with excitement.

"Plenty of times," Spencer smiled and looked over at me, a blush crawling upon her skin.

I could tell she was enjoying her conversation with the four year old. But it made her more of a softy and I knew that killed her inside.

It was more than adorable.

"So open mic night?" I turned back to Chase, who was checking off some sort of list on her clipboard.

"Yeah," she smiled, "it's been a while since the town threw things for teenagers to enjoy without having to be nineteen to party in the bars. Ephiny and I thought it'd be a good idea to make Saturday nights open mic night. So far it's working."

I glanced around the huge place and really got a glimpse of how many people were waiting for a turn to share their music or comedic skills.

The evening was special to me and Spencer. I mean, I had just proposed to her and I wanted to seal that with something else I had been working on. Making sure she wasn't paying attention to me, I whispered something in Chase's ear and was happy that she nodded and told me to follow her.

"Spence," I caught her attention and cupped her cheek softly, "I'll be right back. Did you want anything to drink?"

"Dr. Pepper." She grinned.

Like I had to ask.

"Me too!" Jaiden giggled and slid off Spencer's lap once I stood, taking my seat beside her.

_I smirked and leaned forward to kiss Spencer's forehead. "Be right back," I whispered and she nodded._

//

I glanced back from the piano sitting in the corner where it was over twelve years ago and felt a sense of warmth run through me. "Mind if I…" I pointed towards it and Chase just smiled and shook her head. I got up and slowly made my way across the empty café, sitting at the polished black bench. My fingers ran over the keys and I closed my eyes.

I saw her.

Those beautiful long blonde locks whipping around her face in the winter wind; her cheeks that were always so rosy while she was on the ice coaching her team; that smile that was only reserved for me.

"**You've been the blanket of security**

**Wrapped around dreams that haunt me**

**You're the heaven that I believe in**

**A world I want to live in**

**I can see that nothing's changed**

**We remain the same**

**A heart can no longer suffer **

**This absence that seemed to last forever…"**

I was so wrapped up in the music that I never even noticed Spencer and the girls walk in.

I was so wrapped up in the music that it shocked me when I felt the bench shift and smaller fingers took over on the lower side of the piano. I shouldn't have been shocked to find Lucas watching my fingers while making her own music.

I smiled and she grinned before I glanced up at Spencer, who was leaning against the piano with Dylan sitting on top. "Wow," she breathed.

I wanted to stop playing but my fingers wouldn't stop and my eyes wouldn't leave hers.

"Did you just make that up?" Lucas stopped and scratched her nose.

"I did." I smiled and put the cover back over the key before standing up. "I didn't know you'd be back so quickly," I made my way over to Spencer, lacing my fingers with hers.

"I didn't know you still played." Spencer bit her bottom lip and then eyed up her daughter with a raised eyebrow and impressive grin, "I didn't know you played at all."

"What?" Lucas shrugged, brushing blonde hair out of her eyes, "I'm a Carlin."

Chase and Ephiny laughed as they came back out from the back. "You really are Lucas."

Lucas and Dylan took off towards the booth when their _free_ hot chocolate was set down on the table.

"You taught her?" Spencer whispered, her fingers grazing the side of my cheek.

"She's a quick study," I nodded and kissed her softly just once, "hope you're not mad."

"What? No!" Spencer pulled back and laughed softly. "It's really sweet of you, baby."

Aw! I loved it when she called me baby.

I was teaching Lil C to play piano while she taught me, a full grown woman, how to skate.

I had a devious plan in the works.

I wanted it to be perfect and I knew Lucas would be the perfect person to help me get it all sorted out.

When the time was right of course.

"I feel old." Ephiny sighed tiredly and looked between me and Spencer. "It's like being in a flashback only I'm a thousand years older."

"Oh honey," Chase frowned and lightly slapped her wife in the stomach, "you're not that old."

"How old do I look?" Ephiny raised a perfectly sculpted eyebrow and posed for Chase, causing the girls to giggle.

"Eph…" Chase shook her head and started to walk away from the older brunette.

"No seriously Chase!" Ephiny took off after her. "How old do I look?"

Spencer laughed and wrapped an arm around my waist, squeezing me close to her. "So how about we have breakfast and hit the road?"

--

**Next time in Points Underneath:**

_We drove down Aiden's parents street and nudged Ashley lightly, "they still live there."_

_Ashley couldn't keep her eyes off the house she once had called home._

_"Did you want to stop?" I slowed down slightly._

_"No." Ashley looked scared and shook her head repeatedly. "I'm just... one thing at a time, please?" She whispered._


	81. Underneath The Carlin Household

**62.2 - Underneath The Carlin Household**

**Spencer's PoV**

"I can't believe you were asked for your autograph Spencer!" Dylan grinned at me as I held onto her hand tight, walking through the packed Toronto airport. It was the day after Christmas and everywhere was crazy.

"I've still got it." I winked and she giggled. We stopped by the washrooms where Lucas and Ashley made a pit stop.

"Mommy!" Dylan bounced and tugged on Ashley's jacket. "Spencer just got asked for her autograph!"

Ashley's eyes flickered to mine and a smile appeared on her face. "Really? You mean I'm dating a famous person?"

"Heck yeah," I nodded firmly and Lucas rolled her eyes, "so treat me well."

"Huh," Ashley laughed, "I think it should be the other way around."

"Auntie Alex!" Lucas screamed excitedly, causing everyone's heads to turn toward my sister in a blonde wig with sunglasses on.

"Hey there squirt!" Alex dropped her knees to envelope her niece into a hug. "You're getting so big."

"It's only been a month," Lucas laughed and beckoned us over with the motion of her hand, "you remember Spencer right? Your sister?"

"Luc." I frowned and she just shrugged, her arm still wrapped tightly around Alex's neck.

"Hey," Alex stood up looking at us while gripping onto Lucas' hand, "it's really nice to see you again."

I let out a smile and a sigh, throwing my arms around her. I felt both her hands come around me and squeeze me a little tighter. I guess tears were normal to fall given our situation. We clutched onto each other as people rushed passed to claim their luggage or loved ones.

"I'm sorry." Alex's voice cracked and I sighed, pulling back. I cupped her face and wiped the tears off her cheeks. "Spence, I'm so sorry."

"I know." I whispered and stepped back a bit. I looked over at Ashley to find her with tears clouding her own gaze. "Oh baby," I smiled softly and pulled her towards us and before I knew it, Ashley and Alex were clutching at each other tightly, crying just as hard as we were.

"No more fighting," Lucas whispered, "it hurts too much."

"Yeah." Dylan nodded with a sombre expression. "I missed Auntie Alex." Her cheeks turned rosy as she blushed at her name for my sister.

"I missed you too." Alex wiped her eyes and swung Dylan around, hugging her close.

"Okay," I threw my hands up in the air and grabbed Dylan's hand in one and Ashley's in the other, "let's get out of here so we can surprise Nana and Grandpa."

--

**Welcome to Midtown – Population 10,837**

Ashley and I shared a look at the same old ratty sign hung high on its poles. We had just finished renting a car in the city and made the hour drive back to my hometown in a slower speed because of the icy roads. I looked in the review mirror to find Alex behind us, her young passengers keeping her entertained.

"She looks good." Ashley said in a happy tone, watching the snowy scenery pass us by. "Alex looks like she's gained some healthy weight. She was getting way too skinny there like every other celebrity in the business."

"I agree." I smiled and turned the heater up a bit more. "I may not really forgive her fully Ash. When I was pregnant with Lucas, she just left me, you know? I can understand why she was upset but to just leave and don't get me wrong, I'm happy she looked out for you, but I'm her sister."

"Believe me, I know." Ashley glanced at me. "That doesn't exactly make me happy with her either." She sighed and grabbed my hand, "but maybe we can try and look over that? You two obviously miss each other. You've been through too much just to throw it all away. She did help me get to you."

I cast a sideways glance at her with my head tilting slightly, "Ash, I can forgive and forget. You know that. It doesn't mean I'm still not slightly pissed off at her. She was really selfish and," I released some air loudly, "can we just see how this week goes?"

Ashley nodded and smiled lightly. "Sorry, I don't mean to be pushy."

"You're not. You've got a big heart and this adult version of you hates confrontations," I giggled when she slapped me lightly on the arm, "and you still take my breath away."

"You told her on the phone that everything was okay," she squeezed my hand, "don't go giving her mixed signals. Promise me you two will talk rationally."

I shifted in my seat and turned down a familiar street. "For you, anything."

"Wow," Ashley grinned and clutched my hand tighter in hers, "this place has not changed at all."

"It's Midtown," I laughed, "what did you expect?"

We drove down Aiden's parents street and nudged Ashley lightly, "they still live there."

Ashley couldn't keep her eyes off the house she once had called home.

"Did you want to stop?" I slowed down slightly.

"No." Ashley looked scared and shook her head repeatedly. "I'm just... one thing at a time, please?" She whispered.

I pressed on the gas to speed up and nodded. "Whenever you're ready." I nodded and the rest of the ride to my own childhood home was quiet.

Pulling into the familiar driveway, I was shocked to find that nobody from inside checked out the window.

"Mom!" Lucas ran towards me and slipped on the ice patch in front of me. She laughed and got up, brushing herself off. "I can't believe we're here!"

"Someone's excited." Ashley grinned.

My family was about to get a nice surprise.

I grabbed my daughter's hand and tugged her towards the front door. The wreath Alex and I had made when we were younger hung on the door in its vintage glory. I looked behind to find Alex and Ashley talking while Dylan tied her boot up, staying out of sight from whoever was going to open the door.

"Nana doesn't know we're here?" Lucas asked, adjusting her beanie cap on her head. "Does she know you and Ashley are back together?"

Oh.

Well, I've mentioned it a couple of times but it'll be real to my parents the moment they see it for themselves.

"She knows." I smiled and Lucas pressed the doorbell.

"_Glen!"_ We heard Paula scream from somewhere in the house. "_Glen can you please get that?"_

Silence.

I heard something slam down and figured Glen wasn't listening to Paula. A few choice words were muttered right before the door opened.

I stood right in front of the older woman with a cheesy grin. "Surprise!"

"My girls!" She screamed delightfully and pulled me in for a tight hug. "Oh my," she breathed and moved to hug her granddaughter. "Hey you."

"Nana!" Lucas giggled and held onto Paula's hand tightly. "Uncle Glen is here?"

"Somewhere." Paula rolled her eyes and waved us in the house with a big grin. "Oh wow, I'm so surprised. Your father and I were just talking about what to have for dinner and now we know to set up two extra plates."

Lucas snickered and took off her coat.

"Mom," I smiled and bit my lip, "you might want to make it five more plates."

"Five?" She looked genuinely confused.

"Well us being here is only half the surprise," I reopened the door and waved Ashley and Dylan over.

They both looked so scared and nervous.

"I'd like you to meet Dylan," I grabbed the small brunette's hand and my mom dropped to her knees instantly. Her eyes were scanning over every single feature and tears filled up in her eyes. "Dylan, this is my mom."

"Hi Mrs. Carlin," Dylan whispered, her cheeks burning red under the scrutiny of Paula.

"Please, call me Nana." She whispered and moved to up the small tanned face, "you look so much like your mother."

"She gets that a lot." Ashley spoke, finally appearing from behind the door. She waved a shy hand and smiled, "hi Mrs. C."

Paula stood up, eyes wide in shock and I ran behind her in case she fainted again. Instead she threw herself forward and pulled Ashley into a hug.

Ashley held my gaze with a look of surprise before falling into the embrace, closing her eyes. Aside from myself and Dylan, my parents were a big part of Ashley's past, one she missed immensely.

"You look so grown up." Paula pulled back and had a big smile on her face.

"And you look wonderful as always Mrs. C." Ashley smiled nervously, her voice quivering slightly.

"Please call me Paula, Ashley." She scolded lightly. "We've been through this already."

"Nana, where's Grandpa?" Lucas frowned and grabbed Dylan's hand. "I want him to meet my sister."

I noticed how my Mom's eyes lit up and the blush that crawled over Dylan's face. "Yea, where is Dad?" I tilted my head and moved to grab Ashley's hand gently. "I want him to meet my girlfriend."

"Oh!" Paula was in hysterics as she grabbed the both of us and jumped up and down. "This is the best Christmas present ever!"

"I've got your luggage Spence." Alex came in the door finally and had herself overloaded with suitcases.

Mom looked between us two sisters and smiled. "You know, I'd call up Ripley's about this miracle, but they wouldn't believe me." She grabbed Lucas' hand. "Come on girls, Grandpa is in the kitchen."

"Thanks." I smiled at my sister and she shrugged like it was no big deal. "Alex," I grabbed her hand and wiped some snow off her jacket collar, "maybe we all can go out for coffee tonight and catch up. All claws will remain retracted and teeth will not be shown."

"I think that sounds like a really good idea." Ashley whispered with a smile.

"Yeah." Alex grinned and bobbed her head up and down. "Totally in."

"Cool." I nodded and grabbed my stuff.

"Are you sure it's cool that we crash here?" Ashley smirked and tugged on my belt buckle, pulling me close to her, "we could always grab a hotel suite with two bedrooms and the girls will be sleeping…"

I groaned quietly at the smouldering look she was giving me.

"Gross." Alex coughed. "Ashley and Spencer up in a tree – f-u-c-k-i-n-"

"Bad word!" Lucas called from the kitchen.

"Pay up sis." I grinned and she shook her head, leaving Ashley and I alone.

"So where were we?" She whispered in a slow heated kiss, pressing against the staircase railing.

"Jesus." I whispered as her lips moved down my neck, nipping my pulse point. "Ash stop."

"Why?" She groaned.

"Because you're making me wet." I husked in her ear and she pulled back, eyes sparkling. "Put some ice on it until tonight," I smiled softly, cupping her cheek, "it's about time we make some noise underneath the Carlin household again."

I wiggled my eyebrows and she grinned devilishly.

_So in love._

--

**Next time in Points Underneath:**

_"So you composed and wrote for Alex's first two albums?" Glen smiled at me and took a sip of his beer, "that's cool. I think I was the only one who didn't end up with the musical gene."_

_"You should see Lucas rock out on the piano." I smirked and he just shook his head laughing. "And yes, Alex and I were a team in the early stages of her career."_

_"I know she thought the world of you." Glen grinned softly and shrugged. "Both of them did."_

_"Well the feeling was mutual." _


	82. Why So Awkward?

**Flashbacks are in **_italics. _This flashback was taken from **Wash It All Away - Chapter 41.1: _Pick Your Study Buddy_**

**63.1 - Why So Awkward?**

**Ashley's PoV**

I don't know what had come over me when we first arrived at Spencer's parents' house. I was overwhelmed by the welcome and then Spencer stood there looking so kind and thoughtful. Then she turned into a delicious dessert I wanted to eat up and I couldn't control it.

That house had some sort of aphrodisiac in it I swear because there was not a single memory I had without some sexiness going on.

I couldn't wait until the day was over and don't get me wrong, I was enjoying catching up with my favourite older Carlins and even spending time with Glen. I didn't know him really though, we met once when I first came to Midtown and then a second time when Spencer and I graduated.

Both times I was focused on his hot middle sister.

At that moment though, with him sitting at the bar and smiling at me while he told me a bit about himself, I wanted to get to know him.

He'd be a brother-in-law after all.

"So you composed and wrote for Alex's first two albums?" Glen smiled at me and took a sip of his beer, "that's cool. I think I was the only one who didn't end up with the musical gene."

"You should see Lucas rock out on the piano." I smirked and he just shook his head laughing. "And yes, Alex and I were a team in the early stages of her career."

"I know she thought the world of you." Glen grinned softly and shrugged. "Both of them did."

"Well the feeling was mutual." I replied softly, my eyes landing on Spencer, who was at the table with Alex and her father talking.

"It's a shame we never got to know each other before," he sighed, "I have a feeling we would've been great friends."

"It's not too late." I raised an eyebrow. "Face it Glen, I'm going to be around for a long time." I smiled and he laughed, nodding his head.

"Glen!" Paula came from the kitchen shortly after the phone rang. "It's Sarah."

Glen's eyes widened and he quickly excused himself, leaving Paula taking his place on his seat.

"I hope that bitch has some good news." She muttered to herself, looking back towards the kitchen where Glen's voice was muffled. "She's keeping Glen's daughter away from him."

"What?" I frowned. "Why?"

"No reason, she's just a cunt." Paula spat hatefully and it made me more grateful than ever to have the Carlin family forgive me for the stupid acts I've pulled in the past.

Glen came running into the room with the phone clutched his chest, a big teary smile on his face. "Sarah's letting me keep Hannah for the week!"

Alex was the first to get up and hug her big brother, laughing and sharing happy tears. Spencer followed and soon the siblings were all tangled together on the floor. You would think they were teenagers and not on the verge of turning thirty or older – but it was really good to see because so far the only tears that were being spilled since being in Midtown, were happy ones.

--

**Alex's PoV**

Since Glen had more than exciting good news, the coffee that Ashley, Spencer and I were supposed to go on was cancelled until tomorrow. We all went out for dinner instead and then Lucas and Dylan were put to bed before the adults gathered around the table to talk some more.

It was hard to do when you had my older sister giving Ashley eye-sex across the table. Even my mom knew they were undressing each other with their eyes and so she excused them and like teenagers, they went giggling up into Spencer's old room, holding hands.

"It's like a time warp." I rolled my eyes but grinned.

"I knew it." My Dad smiled proudly and nodded, looking at me. "You did the right thing by letting me know about Dylan, Alex."

I knew that. I knew that telling my Dad wasn't what got everyone upset. It was the way I did it and hid it all.

"Ashley's smoking hot." Glen held up his hands. "I'm just sayin'."

I nodded and was about to say something when my cell phone rang. "Hey." I smiled softly while excusing myself away from the table.

"_Hey back,"_ Tracey sighed quietly over the phone.

"How are you?" I asked, sinking down onto the couch.

"_Dead."_ She laughed and I heard some rustling before she breathed softly into my ear. _"I tried the house phone, are you not home?"_

I blushed even though she couldn't see me. I had issues with being alone. "I'm at my parents' place."

"_Figures."_ Tracey laughed. _"I'm sorry we had to spend Christmas apart. I know I promised you that if you stopped your Tour for the Holiday, I wouldn't go away for any games."_

What was in a promise nowadays?

"It's okay Trace," I smiled and played with the corner of the throw pillow, "it's not that bad. I miss you, but at the same time, the family's been patching things up too."

"_Family?"_ I could tell she was confused and curious.

"Spencer, Ashley and the girls," I couldn't hide the excitement in my voice, "they're here right now. They came for a surprised visit, isn't that cool?"

"_Yea, of course is it."_ Tracey shifted again and I clutched my phone to my ear more.

"When are you coming home?" I asked quietly. It felt like weeks since I've seen her, I did miss her.

"_I'm not sure. We have this huge tournament coming up and Coach wants us to practice like hell. You think Spencer's bad with her coaching? This guy wins by far." _ A tired yawn escaped her.

"Sammy was saying that Carmen took time off hockey to spend time with everyone, I wish you could tell the team you had to come back to your girl." I pouted.

"_Sammy and you have been hanging out a lot lately, haven't you_?"

I don't think it was supposed to sound jealous but I could detect a hint of it in her voice. Tracey wasn't one to be jealous of me but when it came to Samantha Taylor, she had her issues. I couldn't blame her though; I mean I did cheat on Tracey with Sam in the beginning of our relationship.

Despite how close those two were, tension was thick when I was around Sam alone.

"Yea," I breathed, "she's been keeping me company as well while visiting her family."

"_That's nice."_

"Are you mad?" I bit my lip and heard my parents and brother start to head to bed. It was a little late.

"_No Alex,"_ she cleared her throat, _"I'm just missing you."_

"Then come home." I whispered desperately.

"_How many times have I begged you to come home?"_ Tracey teased but it stung.

I was getting that from both women.

"Well I'm here now just like you asked and there you are – where I'm not." I sighed heavily.

"_Are you mad?"_ She turned the question around on me.

"I'm just tired, it's been a long day." I bit my lip and fought the frustration coursing through me. "I guess I'll hear from you tomorrow?"

"_Yeah,"_ Tracey whispered, _"tell everyone I said hi. I'll try and come home soon."_

I nodded and that was the end of the phone call.

The awkward phone call.

I closed my eyes tightly and threw myself back on the couch. I received a text message a few minutes later and tried my best to ignore it but I was curious.

**Do u no any1 who gives lessons for the guitar?**

//

_My fingers skimmed the soft skin along her abdomen. My eyes were locked on hers in a heavy dance of arousal. Her lips were so full and swollen from kissing her deep and hard. Her blue eyes shifted and then she was back on me, hands in my hair, clutching my scalp as her tongue swept itself into my mouth graciously._

_I moaned and dipped my fingers under the waistband of her jeans, digging my fingertips into the tender skin of her hips as she straddled me on my bed. Deep down I knew I shouldn't be doing this right at that moment. Even though Spencer covered me and told me to close my bedroom door while she and Ashley distracted my mom and dad, I knew if Sammy and I went any further, it'd be hard to stop – again._

"_Alex," she moaned and brought her lips down to my neck, pushing her hips more into my questing yet stilled fingers, "I can't take this anymore," she pulled back, her pale skin rosy and flushed. _

"_I'm sorry," I breathed and withdrew my hands from their place on her lithe hips but she stopped me. I looked at her questioningly. "What's wrong?"_

"_I want you," her eyes darted across the darkened room before they landed back on me, "and I can wait for you, but just know, I really," her voice dropped as her lips pressed just below my ear, "really want you."_

_I bit my lip, squeezing my eyes shut, catching my breath. "Sam," I recaptured her lips and pushed her back so that my body rested against hers across my bed. We shared another passionate kiss and my hands began to wander again. I skimmed the skin under her shirt before sliding a hand up her ribcage, loving how goose-bumps erupted on her body, and cupped a lace-clad breast. She inhaled sharply, taking my own breath away. _

"_Hey!" Spencer knocked loudly on my door with the clearing of her throat. A signal saying that Paula was on her way up. _

"_Shit," I jumped off my girlfriend, ignoring her frustrated groan and flicked my light on, straightening out my clothes and waited for Sammy to do the same. I wrenched open the door to find Ashley and Spencer grinning at me with stupid smirks. "What?"_

"_Too bad you two got caught kissing yesterday," Spencer shrugged, "we wouldn't have to have this whole signal thing and you two would be making with the uh, whatever you two were doing."_

_I scowled and made my way back to my bed, sitting beside Sammy as I pulled my math book to rest in between us. "We were studying."_

"_Good for you girls," my mom's voice sounded through the doorway, "see Spence? Why can't you and Ash be studying? Seems like every corner I turn, you two are locked in your own little world."_

_I laughed. "Tsk tsk Spencey," I smirked._

"_Shut up," Spencer spat and tugged on Ashley's arm, "come on, let's go make out on the couch."_

_Ashley blushed and avoided eye contact with my mom. Her brown eyes locked on mine and she winked. "Have fun 'studying'."_

"_Hey you two!" My mom called after my sister. "No hands under the clothes!" She turned her attention back to me and smiled. "Sorry they interrupted your 'study' session," she smiled and closed the door again. _

_Sammy looked at me confused. "What just happened?"_

"_Did she just close the door?" I asked, wide eyed and watched Sammy nod slowly. "Maybe she knows I won't uh, go any further now that she knows we were caught 'studying'."_

_Sammy couldn't help but smile and pressed her lips against mine gently, "so how about you give me another 'guitar lesson' then?"_

_Samantha Taylor! _

_I chuckled and nodded, cupping the back of her neck as I pulled her back down on top of me, the math book slipping off the surface. "I love the way you think," I breathed before we were caught up in another heated moment._

//

I smirked and shook my head before dialling the number. A husky voice answered and I stood up, grabbing my winter coat and turning off the living room lights. "I'm just heading home, why don't you meet me there?"

--

**_A/N: Just so we're clear, if you couldn't tell, I am a HUGE Salex fan myself. However, their future has yet to be determined._**

**Next time in Points Underneath:**

_Pure, unadulterated NSFW passionate... grown-up Spashley time. (Dialogue is very minimal, just a fair warning in advanced.)_


	83. Just For A Moment

**63.2 - Just For A Moment**

**_Rated NC17 (M)_**

**Spencer's PoV**

Ashley was practically ripping my clothes off the moment we stepped into my childhood bedroom. I had no clue what had gotten into her but I wasn't going to complain. I was already topless and her hands were caressing my breasts.

"Remember that one time?" She breathed hotly, nipping at my pulse point while her hands drifted down my stomach and busied themselves on my belt buckle.

"I remember a lot of times." I whispered, tugging the bottom of her shirt up over her head.

"God that one time for my 18th birthday when you snuck into my room with nothing on but a trench coat," she growled and bit every inch of exposed skin she could find, helping me strip my jeans down my legs.

"How could I forget?" I gasped as she dropped to her knees, her lips pressing insistently on my stomach.

"And that fucking tie," she breathed, her nails scratching down the top of my thighs as she tugged at my underwear with her teeth. She moaned when my hands wove through her hair, pressing her closer to me.

Ashley slowly slid my underwear down one inch at a time and there I was, completely naked against the door, panting heavily. "Ashley." Her name bounced off the walls as I felt that talented tongue sliding graciously through the slickness of my folds, her hand slowly resting my leg over her shoulder.

"God." She moaned loudly. One of her hands drifted up my tensing stomach and cupped a breast as she worked her tongue over my clit softly. "I fucking crave you." She breathed.

I tugged on her hair and pulled her up, mashing our mouths together. As much fun as it would've been to be taken up against the door, I don't think it'd be quiet enough – not with the way she makes me thrash about.

I managed to devastate Ashley from all her clothing and soon we were on my twin size bed, slick bodies moving as one. Her lips wrapped around my earlobe and tugged on it while my own nails scratched down her back, arching into her body more.

Fuck I was on fire.

I hissed with pleasure as Ashley bit gently down on my hardening nipple. Her tongue bathed and soothed my want with light strokes and flickers across the tight skin.

Ashley smiled into my breast knowing that she could make this night go on forever if she wanted to. She had me right where she wanted me, squirming, writhing, whimpering, and…wet.

I gasped loudly when Ashley entered two fingers inside of me without any warning. My hips jerked upwards, accepting her fingers fully. "So wet…" I heard Ashley whisper against my skin.

Grazing her thumb along my clit, her fingers were in full concentration, exploring the softness and warmth of me. Using long smooth strokes and soft thrusts, I felt my inner walls contract around her fingers. She licked the beads of sweat that formed on my body, working between my breasts, dragging her tongue down across the quivering flat stomach. "So sweet…" She whimpered nipping the flesh between her teeth every now and then, making me hiss with pleasure.

My hands flew in Ashley's hair, my breathing was hoarse and all thought had left my mind, replaced by dancing colours and spots that flickered behind my eyelids. My hips moved in time with Ashley's soft thrusts perfectly; but I was urging her head to move lower to no avail. I felt the vibrations of her chuckle against my sensitive skin.

Silky skin moved across silky skin, breathing became in sync, and the high pitches and low groans and moans filled the small spacious bedroom at the Carlin's.

Her mouth drank from mine swallowing any sound I had made as a powerful whirlwind flashed through us both. Ashley's fingers slowed a bit inside me, totally unaware of the death grip I had her in.

My body quivered and shook violently as Ashley continued to stroke deep within, pressing down on my clit and gently massaging it. I rode out my orgasm along side her, holding on tightly, and breathing in and out of Ashley's mouth rapidly. My mind screamed; something my vocal chords would not allow me to do right at that moment.

"I love you." Ashley murmured, placing butterfly kisses all over my face, calming me down, and slowly slipping out of me.

I whimpered, pressing myself closely to her not wanting the feeling of warmth and completeness to leave me yet. "Just for a moment." My voice was barely audible, sighing in complete contentment when Ashley's hand stayed within the soft warm cove. "I love you too baby."

We curled up together to catch our breath.

I guess I had fallen asleep because I was woken up with lips trailing down my neck and fingers grazing the inside of my thigh. Ashley had been just as eager to go and I stifled a giggle as she shot horny daggers at me that told me shut up and fuck her.

Okay then.

I growled and flipped Ashley on her back, kissing her hard and deep.

Her back arched the moment I cupped her hot, wet center, sliding two fingers slowly inside. "Fuck Ash."

Sweat trailed down between Ashley's breasts. I groaned as her muscles clenched when I added a third finger into the silky wetness.

We both moaned deeply when I found her hard erect clit with my lips, sucking gently; teasing her.

Feeling Ashley squirm was pure pleasure and heaven.

She arched her back, her head thrashed from side to side when I put a little more pressure on her clit. A quiet whimper escaped her lips when I pulled back just as fast. "Spencer…" Her voice was full of arousal, need, and plenty of warning. I knew if I didn't make my move soon, Ashley would flip me over and the slowness would be forgotten.

I looked up and grinned when I saw the creases on her forehead turn into a frown. Stilling my fingers inside the sleek warmth, I waited for a reaction from Ashley, and a reaction I got.

Ashley lifted her head from her damp pillow and glared at me, her voice so raspy and dark. "Why the fuck are you being so evi- fuck." I curled my fingers inside and began to slowly stroke that one sensitive spot.

My lips caught her clit again and Ashley tugged on my hair roughly, thrusting herself into me.

Playtime was definitely over.

Her breathing hitched when I moved faster and harder inside of her with a steady rhythm and the pressure on her clit increased when a thumb pressed down. I left the greatest dessert ever and hovered over her, watching her eyes squeeze shut and mouth let out a lot of real dirty words that made me blush.

She was fucking _hot_.

I kissed her deeply, causing us both to moan. My free hand braced myself above her, licking her top lip and then nipping at the bottom one. I felt Ashley's hands skim my sides with her nails, making my body shudder against her rapid thrusting hips. Then she cupped my breasts and squeezed with little force. I whimpered into her mouth when her fingers took each of my nipples and squeezed them with greater force. The pain turned into pleasure, my fingers inside Ashley drove deeper and I felt her tense and freeze.

God I loved making her lose total control.

Despite where we were, my name fell from her lips loudly in one long moan.

I collapsed on top of her and she clung to me tightly, her face buried in my neck while mine was tucked securely in hers.

I knew the night was far from over and I knew that once she had a chance to catch her breath, she'd be ready to go again.

How did I know?

Her hips were still jerking slightly and she whispered in my ear not to fall asleep.

I grinned and inhaled her sweet scent.

There was nothing like having sex under your parents' roof.

--

**Next time in Points Underneath:**

_"Sam, do you still think about me?" She asked softly, her fingers playing with the sleeve of my shirt._

_"All the time." I smiled and pressed a kiss to her forehead._

_I wasn't sure where we stood at that point and to be honest, it was all a jumbled mess. _


	84. Lost Lovers, Forever Friends

**_To ALL the Salex fans... every road has a rainbow, it's just a matter of choosing the right path. _**

**_I DO own SALEX! Not SoN though._**

**64 - Lost Lovers – Forever Friends**

**Sammy's PoV**

"Okay, one last time, your fingers don't move down the fret." Alex smirked and sat back on her couch in her home studio. "You really suck at this, you know?"

I laughed and placed the guitar down, putting my hands up in the air. "I suck, I admit it." I grabbed my coffee and took a sip, peering over at the woman across from me. "So what's up?" I asked softly, knowing her body language all too well.

Alex sighed and brushed a hand through her hair. "I just had a tiny fallout with Tracey before I came here."

I frowned in concern. "About what?"

"I don't know really," she let out a laugh and sat up on the couch, tucking her legs under her, "mainly about us."

"Us?" I raised an eyebrow, pointing between her and me; she nodded. "There is no 'us'."

"I know." Alex breathed and picked at her fingernails. "I think because we've been spending so much time together, I guess she thinks there is an 'us'."

"Well there isn't." I insisted softly and sat down next to Alex on the couch. "She really has nothing to worry about."

"Really?" Alex asked quietly, her grey eyes finally looked up into mine for the first time since we started the conversation.

I grabbed her hand and squeezed it gently. "Alexis, you know that you'll always be my number one girl, right? I mean, you know that there'll always be a part of me that'll never stop loving you."

Alex held my gaze and nodded. "Same here."

"Remember when I first came back to you after leaving and we ended up jumping right into bed together without talking?" I hated the memory because it had to have been one of the best times in bed ever, yet it was tainted by the knowledge that she was with someone else.

"How could I forget?" Alex shook her head.

"We can't do that again," I licked my lips, "I mean you're engaged to an incredible woman and I'm dating Carmen."

"I know." Alex frowned and let go of my hand, standing up. "I never said I was going to do that again," she looked hurt for a second, "do you really think I'd do that to either of you again?"

"Well no, I-"

"Tracey has been the only one who tells me when I'm being a complete asshole yet understands it all. She's been my rock through these past couple of months." Alex started to pace.

"Alex… I know that…"

"She was pretty much the only one who told me it'd all be okay and I had no choice but to believe her because she was the only one…" she stopped talking and looked out the window.

"I wish I could've been there," I moved towards her, my hands reaching out to touch her shoulders only to have her pull away, "Alex?"

"Yet here I am, wishing all that time I was with you!" She laughed and shook her head. "Can you believe it? I mean I haven't seen or heard from you in months and all of sudden we're hanging out every day. Yet I still think about you and wonder 'what if'."

I stepped back and tilted my head slightly. "We always think about our first loves," I whispered, "it's normal."

"It's not when you're engaged and you're still wondering if you made the right choice." Alex spat out and rubbed her hands over her face hard. "God I'm such a fucked up mess."

I swallowed and successfully grabbed her hands and pulled her into a hug. "Was it better when I was away from you?"

"No." Her voice was muffled through my shirt. "It hurts."

"Alexis," I sighed and rested my forehead against hers, "we can't do this."

Tears started to fall and fingers gently wiped them away delicately. I felt for her because I knew exactly what she was talking about. If I had never walked away from her that day, would she still be mine? If I had come back before Tracey entered the picture, would I be the one who was proposed to on national television?

I questioned those a lot too, I was only human after all. I admit I never got over Alexis Carlin. It'd be a hard thing to achieve. I also knew that remaining friends was the best either of us could do.

I liked Carmen and I was interested to see where things would go but at the same time, spending time alone with Alex has been a dream come true.

Did I want to kiss her? Yes.

Would I? No.

As much as we hadn't changed, Alex and I changed even more so with growing up.

I missed her and I wanted her back in my life but in the meantime, being her friend was the only thing I could offer her.

"I know." She sniffled and pulled away from me. "I'm just so confused Sammy. I love her, I really do. I don't want to hurt her because she deserves so much, you know?"

I only nodded, staring at her.

"But yet, if I keep thinking this way about you – how fair is it to her?" She whispered hoarsely and wiped her eyes again. "I'm trying to be a better person and it seems I can only be myself when I'm with you and I'm so sorry that I ruined that for us years ago."

"Stop." I wrapped an arm around her shoulders and ran a hand through her hair. "You can't go through life beating yourself up over things that had happened forever ago. We both know that they can't be changed. You can, however, go on with the life you live now and start making decisions before you step past that point of regret again."

"Yea?" Her raven hair fell forward into her eyes and I tucked strands behind her ear.

"Yea."

"Sam, do you still think about me?" She asked softly, her fingers playing with the sleeve of my shirt.

"All the time." I smiled and pressed a kiss to her forehead.

I wasn't sure where we stood at that point and to be honest, it was all a jumbled mess.

My phone started to ring and I smiled slightly knowing who it was calling me that late. "Excuse me," I pulled away from Alex, much to her protest and grabbed my phone. "It's about time you called," I laughed and averted my eyes from grey ones that stared at me.

"_I'm one popular chick, what can I say?" _ Carmen laughed. _"Have you seen the Carlin-Davies clan yet?"_

"Nah, they needed time with the family before I butted my nose in." I bit my lip.

"_What are you talking about Taylor? You are part of their family. You've been sleeping with the youngest one for years."_ She replied with a grin.

"Carmen!" I hissed and blushed as Alex's eyes never really left me. "So what? It doesn't mean I can intrude on a fragile time you know. Ashley is seeing Paula and Arthur again for the first time since graduation."

"_Whatever, you were probably too busy hanging out with Alex anyway."_ The teasing tone in her voice comforted me because I knew she wasn't one to get jealous over us. She wasn't the biggest Alex fan at the moment but she respected my friendship with her.

"Oh yea, we had a couple of hot dates." I winked at Alex and Carmen's husky chuckle echoed through my ear.

"_I so hope you got it on video tape."_

"Pervert." I gasped and sat down on the floor next to the fireplace. "Your head is always in the gutter."

"_I can tell you where else I want it to be."_ She purred and I swallowed, biting my lower lip. "_Unless of course you have company."_

"Alex and I were just talking." I looked up to find the musician already walking out of the room and up the stairs. "I think she's heading to bed though."

"_I should be too,"_ Carmen yawned, _"I have an early flight."_

"Where?"

"_Midtown. Night babe."_ She blew me a kiss and hung up.

I made my way up the stairs and noticed Alex sitting on her bed, a picture of Tracey in her hand. "Hey," I said softly, not stepping into the room, "I think I'm going to head home."

Alex turned around and nodded. "Thanks for keeping me company."

"She'll be home soon," I smiled softly, "out of everyone in the world Alexis, you're the one we all have a hard time staying away from."

"Thanks." She smiled and made her way towards me, pulling me into a hug. "You're amazing Samantha Taylor."

"Right back atchya, babe." I winked and patted her back.

We weren't in high school anymore and there was no reason for me to send anymore confusing signals to Alex. She needed to be with the one she loved and I wasn't about to assist her in that decision – one she had to make alone.

I couldn't wait to see Carmen though and hopefully Tracey would make it back soon.

Maybe then the pieces of that messed up puzzle would finally come together.

Maybe.

--

**Next time in Points Underneath:**

_"Good morning." I whispered and kissed her softer that time. "It's time to get up. I don't hear the house stirring yet so we may have gotten lucky with not being heard last night."_

_"Please," she groaned while she stretched, "you totally screamed my name several times."_

_"Uh," I nodded – like I'd deny that, "duh but maybe everyone was out like the dead."_

_"Maybe." Ashley smirked but didn't buy it. _


	85. Sleepy Head Davies

_bleed4her: __You rock my socks off. It's a good thing I already have you, otherwise I'd have to steal you from your girlfriend like I did before. (; Thank you for always being my inspiration! I love you._

**Flashbacks are in **_italics. _This flashback was taken from **Points Underneath - Chapter 1: _Golden Treasures._**

_Okay, we're heading back into some more serious territory in the next few chapters. Dylan's past, Ashley's present with her family and a tearful goodbye coming up later on. Oh it's gonna be good!_

**65.1 - Sleepy Head Davies**

**Dylan's PoV**

_**She had my arm in a death grip and her eyes were black like the Devil's. The thick metal spoon was pressed against my hand as she yelled at me in my face. "You ungrateful little bastard! Your Mommy doesn't love you or you wouldn't be in here while she's out there doing God knows what."**_

_**Laughter was being heard from all sides of me and I choked up, tensing as the old brittle woman told me to never leave her gaze. She'd make me her children's next lunch meat if I did. "You think that dyke Spencer wants you? She only wants what your Mommy has to offer."**_

_**I couldn't move and it was killing me. The painful grip on my arm and the horrible looks I was getting – it was all too much.**_

I woke up in a strange room in a strange bed and slightly panicked, whimpering and sweaty. I had another nightmare again.

I blinked away the sleepiness in my eyes and clutched at my pillow as another shiver ran through my body.

Where was Lucas?

"Dylan?" I heard a soft knock on the door and sat up quickly, trying to wipe the unknown tears from my cheeks. Spencer's head popped in the door and she tilted her head, dressed in a black robe and she looked like she just had a shower. "Hey sweetie," she came inside the room and closed the door behind her before crawling under the covers with me, "are you okay?"

I swallowed and shook my head.

"What's wrong?" She pulled me into her lap and ran her fingers through my hair, rocking gently. "Please don't cry Baby Dyl, it breaks my heart."

I curled up into her warm body and briefly noticed she smelled just like my Mommy. I immediately felt safe in her arms but couldn't shake the dream from my head.

"Did you have a bad dream?" Spencer whispered and I noticed she glanced at the clock. It was only after four in the morning. I nodded and allowed her to hold me tighter. "Did you want to talk about it?"

"No." I whispered and stared at the wall in front of me. "Where's Lukey?"

Spencer smiled and rubbed my back. "I'm guessing she took off to sleep with Nana and Grandpa. It's a thing with her."

"Oh." I sighed heavily and continued to stare at the wall. "Do you love me?"

I felt her shift and she moved me so I was eye level with her. "What?" She asked confused and I regretted that I asked the question. "Of course I do."

"Sorry." I murmured. "I had a dream that you were only around because Momma gave you something." I wasn't entirely sure what that meant in my dream but I knew it wasn't exactly a good thing.

"I'm around because I love you both very much, Dylan." Spencer pressed a kiss to my forehead. "You're my daughter and I wouldn't want it any other way."

I couldn't help but grin and blush at those words. A moment of silence passed and I yawned, snuggling more comfortably in Spencer's body. "How'd you know I was awake?"

"I heard you whimper," she softly said, "I was just coming back from the bathroom."

"Can you stay?" I asked quietly. Spencer smiled and nodded, kissing the top of my head.

"I'll be right back, I promise." She made her way towards the door and left it open while I watched her sneak into the room she was sharing with my mom. A few minutes later, she came back out in flannel pants and a jersey, crawling in next to me. "See? I came back."

I smiled and wrapped my small arm around her shoulder, burying my face in her neck.

Sleep came easily to me that time.

--

**Spencer's PoV**

It felt different waking up when I rolled over to find a miniature Ashley curled up behind my back sleeping peacefully. I brushed some stray curls out of her face and kissed the tip of her dark freckled nose. "Sleepy head," I whispered when I realized it was already after nine and no one had bothered to wake us up.

Ashley was probably still sleeping no doubt. I definitely wore her out – yea, I was that good.

Dylan stretched and let out a soft mewl before opening her eyes and looking confused for a second before her dark brown eyes landed on me. God her smile will always melt me. "Morning."

"Morning," I grinned and sat up, stretching my own worn down muscles, "how are you feeling?"

"Better." Dylan nodded and licked her lips. "Sorry you missed morning snuggles with Momma."

"Ah," I waved her off and scooped her up, kissing her cheek, "I have a lifetime supply of Momma snuggles."

Dylan giggled happily and it felt different from her mood earlier that morning. I didn't want to push it so I rubbed her knee and got out of bed. "I believe we're going to have Grandpa and Nana make us a huge 'welcome home' breakfast, wanna come watch?"

She nodded and pulled the covers off her small body, her hair messy. "How do I look?"

"Cute." I smirked and grabbed her overnight bag and dug out a few clothing items.

"Spence?" Dylan's hand was on mine and I glanced at her. "I'm kind of scared."

"Of what baby?" I knelt down and was eye level with her.

"Will they like me?" She asked in a shaky voice. "Anton and Cailyn, will they like me?"

"They're going to love you." I smiled and then frowned and cupped her cheek. "What's wrong, Dyl?"

"I had a dream that no one liked me." Her small hands crumbled in her lap as she hung her head. "It felt real, it felt like I was back at Mrs. Hotkins place again where she had 5 other kids and I was the only one that had to stay home from school to clean."

I frowned and stood up slowly. "Mrs. Hotkins?" I was guessing that she was a Foster Parent of hers.

"She would always make fun of my mommy and why she wasn't ever coming back for me. I never understood what that bad 'S' word meant until she explained it to me." Dylan's shoulders fell and it broke my heart.

No one at that age should know what the word 'slut' meant. I highly doubted Lucas knew what that was and even though bad language was thrown around a lot, which was one word that was never thrown around.

"Oh baby," I sat next to her on the bed, "you know who's across the hallway snoring at the moment? Your mom."

Dylan grinned slightly and looked towards the door that was propped open slightly. "Is Grandpa," she blushed at those words but continued her sentence, "is Grandpa the one that helped me get into your home?"

I smiled. "Yea, Auntie Alex helped as well."

"Spencer?" Her voice went back to being quiet. "When I was at Mrs. Hotkins, she'd never let me talk at the dinner table. I remember the one time I wanted to share a story because the other kids were, she smacked me hard with a wooden spoon on the hand. She told me if I cried then I'd only get it worse."

Oh God.

//

_A small noise pulled me out of my thoughts and I found the small brunette standing shyly in the doorway. Her brown eyes were full of life but her body language was anything but. Her hair was dirty and clothes were ripped._

_Where did she just come from? What kind of foster parent or group home would allow a child to look like that?_

"_Dylan?" I smiled and she nodded, her eyes casting downwards. "Don'__t be shy," I got up and patted the chair in front of my desk, "you can sit here."_

_Dylan shuffled her feet slowly and crawled into the chair, her eyes looking straight ahead out the window. "How are you, Miss Carlin?" She finally spoke and I glanced up at her with awe. _

_She had manners._

"_I'__m very well, thank you." I sat on top of my desk and leaned forward. "How are you?"_

"_I smell." She scrunched up her nose in the cutest nose crinkle, causing my heart to immediately swell._

//

All I could picture in my head with the broken small nine year old standing in the doorway of my office dirty and shy. No wonder she had a hard time opening up to people.

"Was this the first time that happened?" I asked softly.

"No, it happened a lot." Dylan murmured. "I cried a lot going to sleep. I hoped all the tears would be gone for when I woke up the next morning."

I closed my eyes and hugged her closer. "You're afraid something bad is going to happen, aren't you?"

"I'm just scared."

"Well," I got up and combed my fingers through her hair, "you've got me here now. You're under the Carlin household and I guarantee you that you can tell a very awesome story about your mom at the table and we'll all be listening to every single word."

I could tell that made her feel slightly better and she nodded, grabbing her clothes and running towards the door. "Don't tell my mom, okay?"

It wasn't for me to tell but I did encourage Dylan to let Ashley in more. "She would really be there to listen if you needed someone to talk too."

"I just don't want her sad." Dylan whispered with a frown.

"I'll let you in on a little secret," I smiled softly, "Mothers know when their child is sad. I promise if you tell her, you'll feel so much better. Both of you will."

Dylan thought about it for a moment. "Okay, love you!"

I snickered and stumbled into my childhood bedroom to find the bed still occupied by one gorgeous brunette. I crawled onto the bed and slid down next to her sleeping frame. "Sleepy head," I repeated the same line I used on her daughter while tucking longer curls behind a perfect ear.

Ashley stirred and blinked several times before smiling and pulling me in for a kiss. "Morning baby."

"Good morning." I whispered and kissed her softer that time. "It's time to get up. I don't hear the house stirring yet so we may have gotten lucky with not being heard last night."

"Please," she groaned while she stretched, "you totally screamed my name several times."

"Uh," I nodded – like I'd deny that, "duh but maybe everyone was out like the dead."

"Maybe." Ashley smirked but didn't buy it. She got up and grabbed her clothes, stuffing them under her arm after pulling on a robe. "I'm going to shower, meet you downstairs."

"What if I wanted to shower first?" I pouted when she opened up the door.

"Too bad, I called it." Ashley shoved me playfully.

"But I-"

"How about I keep the girls occupied downstairs and you two can pick up where you left off early this morning." Paula said calmly as she walked by giving us the thumbs up.

"Told you." Ashley snickered with a soft blush and rolled her eyes. "Meet you downstairs Carlin."

"Meet you downstairs Carlin." I mocked but kissed her anyway. "Hurry up and don't waste the hot water."

"Go, you already showered earlier you hog." She grinned teasingly and shut the door.

"Not my fault you refused an early morning shower with me!" I banged on the door that closed in my face. "You used to be fond of those!"

--

**Next time in Points Underneath:**

_Arthur put his head down with a small smile before making his way to sit down beside me. "I just want you to know that it wasn't my intention of keeping Dylan a secret from Spencer or from telling you where she was exactly."_

_"I know." I whispered quietly._

_"The reason why I wanted it quiet while you were in your program was because I had heard you were progressing so well Ashley. That you were fighting the system with everything you had by playing by the rules and then checking yourself back in for reassurance."_


	86. My Mom, My Piano Playing Hero

**Flashbacks are in **_italics. _This flashback was taken from **Wash It All Away - Chapter 65: _A Hope To Be Held._**

**65.2 - My Mom – My Piano Playing Hero**

**Spencer's PoV**

"_It wasn't easy for us. We came from completely different families. You know her adopted parents were hardcore Christians just like the Woods and mine were basically hippies. They didn't like me." Dad paced the room. "It drove us apart before we really even got together."_

_I sat up and hugged my pillow. "What happened?"_

"_We broke up," a flash of sadness crossed his features, "she left me for the captain of the lacrosse team because his parents made him go to church every Sunday. School ended, we graduated and a couple of years later we met up at a local club where I swept her right back in my arms."_

"_Hence Glen." I rolled my eyes and gagged. My dad lightly punched me on the shoulder and laughed. "So you two actually broke up for two years before getting back together?"_

"_It was hard at first, but we were a little older and understood a lot more. I knew I couldn't live without her." Dad chuckled and braced himself on my knee. "Want to hear something funny?"_

"_Uh, if it involves creepy parent sex, then no." I shuddered and he rolled his eyes. _

"_Your mom was with someone when I swept her off her feet."_

"_Huh?" I grinned. "You let her cheat?"_

"_She was with someone for about three months when we met up again."_

"_Poor guy." I shook my head with a smirk and dad raised an eyebrow at me. I raised one back in question._

"_Poor gal."_

"_Oh." I laughed and then stopped. "What?!" I yelped and jumped up on my bed, "What?"_

"_What is the commotion in here?" The devil herself walked in with a hand on her hip. "You two really need to tone it down, Kyla and Aiden are downstairs with the baby and Spencer why are you looking at me like that?" She looked at me while I smirked at her and bounced off my bed. "What?"_

"_Spence…" Dad warned me and smiled lightly at his wife._

"_You little whore." I said playfully and the look on my mother's face was priceless. I ignored her 'Spencer!' and closed the door so that both of my parents were trapped in my room with me. "So uh, dad and I were having an interesting conversation."_

"_Do I want to know?" Paula eyed her husband up and then glanced back at me. "Spencer, why are you looking at me like that?"_

"_What was her name?" I asked calmly, looking at my nails._

"_Who?" She frowned in confusion. "God Spencer, I don't have time for your mind games right now."_

_Mind games._

_Trying going through one with Ashley fucking Davies._

"_The one you left for dad?" I asked innocently, beaming a smile at my parents as if I had just aced a hard test._

"_Arthur!" Paula looked at him and shook her head._

"_It's not that big of deal." He shrugged with a grin. "Come on, both of our daughters are gay, do you really think they're going to tease you?"_

"_Yes." I answered for her with an impish grin._

"_Rachel Hunter." Paula said quietly. "We met first day of college, no big. Once your father entered the picture-"_

"_-again…"_

"_Did you tell her our whole love life?" She whipped her head around to look at my dad._

_Ah, my parents were great at keeping my mind off my heartache._

_Heartache._

"_Ashley broke up with me today." I whispered._

_I don't think silence could be that deafening but it hurt my ears when both of my parents stared at me._

"_Yea, she broke up with me and called off the engagement."_

"_Engagement?!" My mom's eyes widened._

"_Whatever, it doesn't matter now." I opened the door and pointed to the hallway. "I want to be alone now."_

"_Is that why you were asking about your mother and I?" My dad dropped down to eye level and lifted my chin with his fingers. I nodded slowly and he pressed a kiss to my temple. "I've never seen a love like yours and Ashley's, Spence. You two were meant to be."_

"_I don't think she feels the same way." I sighed and felt my chest grow heavy again._

"_Even if she doesn't now," Paula interrupted us and patted my head, "she'll realize it."_

--

**Ashley's PoV**

I was sitting down at the dining table while Spencer was outside playing street hockey with the girls. "You still make the best coffee Paula." I smiled at the blonde across from me.

"Oh thanks." She smiled and looked back down at her morning paper.

"Are you sure you don't want seconds?" Arthur smiled at me from the kitchen doorway with a small stack of pancakes.

"Thanks but I'm quite stuffed." I laughed and he nodded, disappearing into the room. I glanced up and noticed Paula looking at me with a tender expression. "What?"

"It's like you never really changed," she tilted her head just like Spencer would do and shuffled her chair closer to mine, "you're still my daughter's Ashley."

I blushed and cleared my throat, silently thanking her.

"Yet it looks like you've been through so much more," she whispered in a sad voice, her hand reaching out to touch mine. "How are you, Ashley?"

I think she noticed the look of shock meets sadness wash across my face and she squeezed my hand tightly. "I'm much better now, thank you." I managed to say after a few seconds of trying to gather my thoughts back. I still felt like I was that seventeen year old that would come over and have a few conversations with Mr. and Mrs. C while I waited for Spencer.

Only this time I didn't have to wait for Spencer. It was just me, a grown up with my girlfriend's parents to talk to at any time.

"Dylan is the most precious girl," Paula gushed with a big smile, "she's talked with me a few times on the phone but to actually see her and meet her, she's just amazing."

"Thank you." I blushed briefly and noticed Arthur standing in the kitchen doorway, a soft look. I felt like he was waiting for the perfect moment to interrupt us so I decided to take the initiative. "And thank you for getting Dylan into a great home."

Arthur put his head down with a small smile before making his way to sit down beside me. "I just want you to know that it wasn't my intention of keeping Dylan a secret from Spencer or from telling you where she was exactly."

"I know." I whispered quietly.

"The reason why I wanted it quiet while you were in your program was because I had heard you were progressing so well Ashley. That you were fighting the system with everything you had by playing by the rules and then checking yourself back in for reassurance."

He sounded so proud of me.

He sounded like my father when I told him that Alex and I released her first record independently. Raife was always the one to do things on his own so for me to have followed his footsteps made him proud.

"And as much as Spencer's a huge strength for you, I know that she could've been you're greatest weakness as well. If you knew where Dylan was going to be, I didn't want you to find yourself unworthy or guilty and falling backwards when you've fought so hard to be where you are now. You care what Spencer thinks about you and you would've worried what she thought of you."

He was right, I admit it. I think that if I knew what was going on, it'd scare me even more because I did care about what Spencer thought of me. I would've been scared that she'd me as a failure at not only a lover, but as a mother as well. She could've been my main fall even though the thoughts of her every day made me stronger.

"I get it Mr. C," I nodded slowly, "I don't hold a grudge against anyone. I've got my little girl back and I've gained an entire family back with her. If anything," I couldn't help but feel choked up, "I feel so damn lucky and so damn thankful that you did what you did."

"I need you to understand something," Arthur scratched his chin and looked over at his wife for what I assumed to be support before his gaze was back on me. "When Alex came to me after your accident and learning that Dylan was taken away from you, I tried to weigh the pros and cons in telling Spencer. I didn't want her involved because I wasn't sure how that would make you feel. I was able to pull some strings after her latest foster care home moved out of district and immediately went to Spencer. It was a huge risk."

Arthur stopped speaking when Spencer came in with her face coloured pink. "Having fun?"

"A blast." She grinned and slid into the seat next to me. "Alex, Carmen and Sammy took the girls for a bit, I hope you don't mind." She flashed me a soft look.

"No, not at all." I reached over and squeezed her hand.

"Spence, are you thirsty? You want a coffee?" Paula smiled at her daughter and got up from her chair, expecting Spencer to follow her.

"Sure, thanks Mom."

Paula eyed up her husband and when he shrugged, she just smiled and walked into the kitchen by herself.

"So am I interrupting anything?" Spencer bit her lip as she noticed the intense look on Mr. C's face. "Did you want me to go?" She started to get up from her chair when her Dad shook his head.

"I was just explaining to Ashley about how Dylan came into your care." Arthur scratched his forehead with his thumb and the father and daughter duo locked eyes. "I did everything I could to try and get her with you sooner, Spencer."

Spencer frowned slightly and swallowed. "Promise me?" She sounded slightly upset and sat up straighter. "I'm thankful Dad, really. I'll send you a lifetime's worth of thank you cards if you want them, but promise me you did everything in your power to get Dylan to me as quick as you could."

"Spencer, you know I'm not lying. She was out of my reach with the system while they were in Edmonton. You know I only have certain parts of Ontario to look after and I tried my best to keep in contact with whichever agency she was going through." Arthur stressed softly and it made my heart hurt.

The whole conversation was making me realize part of what Dylan went through while I wasn't around. How the hell could I have ever let my daughter be put in such a system?

Why couldn't I have thought rationally after hearing about my parents' death and allow one of the other parents to drive her home? Or catch a cab to pick her up?

Why?

"You don't know what Dylan went through in those homes." Spencer whispered sadly and she caught my eye briefly. "God Dad, you weren't there when she showed up in my office looking the way she did! How the hell could someone ever treat her like that?"

I knew Dylan went through really hard times but no one had really vocalized exactly what had happened to her. I promised her she could tell me when she was ready – and I respected Spencer for allowing her to do the same. At the same time, I wished she could tell me _something_.

"What?" I barely recognized my own voice, not realizing just how broken I sounded at the thought of my daughter being hurt in any way – because of me.

Spencer's head snapped to mine and she was quick to grab my hand, her other hand cupping my cheek. "She was beautiful Ash, just a little broken on the outside." I felt her gaze shift towards her father, "thank you for everything you did to get her to me," her lips pressed against the hand she was holding, "to us."

Paula chose that moment to interrupt us with another round of coffee. She smiled at the both of us and sighed, sitting down next to Spencer. "Didn't your father and I tell you that you'd be finding each other again someday?"

"Yeah," Spencer looked at me with a smile and let her thumb graze over my bottom lip, "and you were right."

I couldn't help but grin back and blush while Spencer checked me out in front of her parents.

"Well," Arthur got up and gave us both a hug, "I'm glad to see you two are happily in love and back together. We've missed you Ash, there was not a day that went by without us thinking about you."

"Yea," Paula placed a hand on my shoulder, "you made quite an impression on us Carlins and it seems you've already become a fast role model for Luc."

Spencer tilted her head to the side and we shared a confused look.

"What?" Spencer smiled uncertainly.

Paula grinned and walked over to the picture box that was located in the hallway closet. She tossed a perfectly well kept white envelope onto the table and raised her eyebrows, pushing it towards me.

I slowly took the folded piece of paper from inside and opened it up. Spencer leaned over my shoulder to get a better view and I heard her gasp while my eyes went wide.

There was yet another sketch of myself sitting at the piano that was stored in my basement. It wasn't like her other sketches, the one I was holding was more detailed, more pronounced and on the left side you could see a perfectly sketched picture of Spencer that was placed on top of the shiny black surface.

"She must've drawn that one of the morning's she spent the night." Spencer whispered, her finger sliding over the sketch portion of me. "Wow."

"Spence…" I moved my hand and noticed the little caption on the bottom in Lucas' neat printing. **"My Mom, My Piano Playing Hero"**

Oh God, I had tears in my eyes and I could tell Spencer's were watering up too.

"She mailed that to me last week. I'd show you the letter she wrote but it's rather personal and it should stay between grandmother and granddaughter." Paula winked and grabbed the drawing gently.

Lucas really loved me. She saw me as her mother.

I was so damn in love with my family.

--

**Next time in Points Underneath:**

_"Hannah, I want you to meet this amazing woman right here." I stepped up next to Ashley and watched as Hannah studied the brunette. "Her name is Ashley."_

_"Ashley?" Hannah's cute brows furrowed and she grinned. "Are you my new mommy?"_

_I couldn't help but laugh at the cute look on Hannah's face and mortified ones on my brother and Ashley. _

_"No sweetheart," Glen nervously snickered, "Ashley is Auntie Spencer's girlfriend."_


	87. We Are Family

**66 - We Are Family**

**Spencer's PoV**

I finished piling in the gifts Ashley insisted we bring for the family. They weren't much but still. Glen just got back from picking up his daughter and for a while there, we thought Sarah had changed her mind because Glen hadn't heard from her.

Turned out Sarah's _boyfriend_ was late picking her up and her parents couldn't watch Hannah. That was the only reason Glen lucked out.

"Auntie Spencer!" I spun around to find myself being knocked into, with small arms thrown around my legs, and a cute brown eyed, blonde little girl smiling up at me. "Hi!" She bounced up and down and I picked her up.

"Hannah!" I gave her a big kiss on the cheek and she giggled. "Wow, you're growing up so fast, how old are you now?"

"Five!" Hannah grinned and her arms came up around my neck. "Where's Lucas?!"

"Lucas is out with Auntie Alex." I put her down and she held onto my hand while we went into the kitchen where Glen was having a conversation with my lovely girlfriend.

"And there she is." Glen said proudly as Hannah let go of me and ran into his arms, her face pressed tightly against his chest.

Aside from Aiden and my own father, Glen was the best at making his child feel loved and wanted. He knew what to say, what to do and raised a perfect little girl for someone who didn't care about his life until he met his bitch wife Sarah and knocked her up.

"Hannah, I want you to meet this amazing woman right here." I stepped up next to Ashley and watched as Hannah studied the brunette. "Her name is Ashley."

"Ashley?" Hannah's cute brows furrowed and she grinned. "Are you my new mommy?"

I couldn't help but laugh at the cute look on Hannah's face and mortified ones on my brother and Ashley.

"No sweetheart," Glen nervously snickered, "Ashley is Auntie Spencer's girlfriend."

"Mommy said two girls can't love each other." The little blonde frowned.

Ashley licked her lips and glanced over at me.

"Mommy shouldn't be saying those things," my brother sat Hannah down on the counter, "you know why?" When she shook her head, he continued. "No one gets to say who falls in love and who they fall for. Auntie Spencer and Ashley have been in love for nearly thirteen years." He slacked his jaw at his daughter and smiled when she giggled. "If you ever fell in love with another girl, you know I'll love you regardless." He kissed her nose and helped her down from the counter and watched as she ran out into the living room to finish watching cartoons.

"Wow," Ashley breathed, "you're amazing with her Glen."

He blushed and shrugged, going back to making some juice. "I know I'm a good father, I just wish I was good enough for the court to see that."

"You have witnesses," I smiled encouragingly, "we'll vouch that you deserve a 'Dad of the Year Award'."

"Thanks," Glen laughed softly, "you two aren't so bad yourselves. I've seen you both this morning with Lucas and Dylan. I always figured Ashley would be wearing the pants though."

"Jerk." I punched his arm with a laugh.

The doorbell rang and Paula was at the door quicker than anyone. "Kyla! Aiden! Kids!" I heard her shriek with joy and rolled my eyes. It wasn't like she didn't see them everyday. Kyla was my sister technically speaking.

"NANA!" I heard a cute little voice echo through the house.

My focus was immediately on Ashley when I noticed her body tensing. "Hey," I wrapped an arm around her waist, "everything okay?"

"No." Ashley frowned and shook her head. "God how can I face them?"

I ran my fingers through her thick curls and kissed her forehead. "Baby, Aiden and Kyla are going to be more than thrilled to see you. You have nothing to worry about."

"What if they see me differently?" She asked, almost in tears. "Oh God Spence, I'm going to be sick."

Glen was right next to Ashley in seconds, handing her some cold water. "Here, drink that slowly, it should help."

I smiled gratefully at him and he winked. "Thanks."

"What are big brothers for?" Glen shrugged and made his way towards the living room to join his daughter.

Ashley clutched at my shirt when we heard footsteps coming closer to the kitchen. I could hear Aiden's voice growing louder. "It'll be okay. He's Aiden. Blood. Your best friend."

"Ashley." Aiden stopped in the doorway and I watched the two cousins exchange a silent look. "Come here." He finally stepped forward and wrapped his more than muscular arms around her more than thin body.

I heard Ashley start to sob into his neck and noticed her arms tighten around Aiden.

I took that as my cue to leave.

Kyla met me at the kitchen doorway with tears in her own eyes at the cousins reuniting. "She looks really good." She whispered.

"Yea, she does." I nodded and felt Kyla slide her hand into my own.

"Where are the girls?" She wiped her eyes and looked around the large living room.

"Ah," I smiled as we left Ashley and Aiden alone, "they are with their aunts. All three of them."

"Three?" She raised an eyebrow.

"Alex, Sammy and Carmen." I sat down on the couch and my eyes lit up when I noticed the tall teenager standing in front of the tree, staring at me. "Anton!" I hopped up and he crushed me. Fuck he was tall.

"Auntie Spencer." Anton smiled and kissed my cheek. "Merry Christmas."

"You too buddy," I grinned and felt two pairs of arms wrap around my legs, "buddies." I corrected as Cailyn and Hannah hung off of me.

"And you said you didn't want kids some day." Paula snickered and made my Dad follow her up the stairs.

--

**Ashley's PoV**

He smelled the same.

He felt the same.

That safe feeling he always gave me was there in his hug as he let me break down and cry. I've broke down and cried countless of times with Spencer, but I was faced with my _family_ for the first time in years, not counting Dylan. Granted Aiden was the one that found me and encouraged me to go to rehab, I couldn't really make that meeting count because I was so high.

Aiden gripped me tighter and I felt hot streams of his tears meet my skin. He was crying too. I couldn't tell you how long we stood like that for but it was needed. Time was slowly healing around us and it was felt like a small weight was being lifted off my shoulders.

"I missed you so much, Ashley." Aiden pulled back and placed his cool hands on my cheeks, brushing away my tears. "God look at you! You're looking so good."

I sniffled and patted his chest. "Same with you Aid," I watched as he studied me very intently, "what?"

"I'm just remembering." He smiled softly and pulled me in for another hug. "No more leaving your cousin all alone with these crazy Carlin women, you hear?"

I couldn't help but laugh and nodded into his chest. "Promise."

"I can't believe you're here. I mean I can believe it, but _here_, with Spencer." Aiden's green eyes twinkled, "feels like high school again, doesn't it?"

"Everything does." I nodded and grinned. "So, you're not mad?"

"I'm not mad." He whispered and sighed heavily. "I worried about you every day, but I knew if I tried to make any contact, someone would end up finding out and you asked me not to say a word…"

"Thank you." I gave him a soft smile and peeked around the corner. "Is that Anton?" The teenager was probably a foot shorter than Aiden, pretty tall for his age.

"That's my boy." He laughed and patted my back. "The young lady in the white dress is Cailyn. She's five and wild."

"Ky's spunk?" I raised an eyebrow and Aiden snickered. "God Aid, she's gorgeous."

"Totally," he wrapped himself around me again, "I know there's a lot to talk about Ash but we have forever to do that now, okay? Let's just enjoy your visit." Aiden pulled back and winked, "besides, word on the street is you're back together with the blonde that had us fighting when you first moved here for school."

"Yea," I nodded and Spencer caught my gaze, her hand lifted up and she waved a little, smiling. "She's pretty much perfect and has been so good with Dylan."

"She's a perfect mother," Aiden sighed and smiled, "I used to think she'd be the one I'd marry, you know? It's like I had it all figured out and no one or nothing could get in my way-"

"Then I come into town and ruined it for you?" I smirked and he laughed.

"That and I started to hang out with Kyla more. In the end it worked out perfectly because we both have beautiful families of our own and we're all still connected together." Aiden wrapped an arm around my shoulders. "Speaking of which, come meet your little cousins."

"Ashley," Kyla rushed towards me and wrapped me up in a hug, "I missed you."

"I missed you too, Ky." I whispered back and separated from her. Spencer was right by my side and I noticed Cailyn looking up at me curiously. "Hey cutie." I knelt down to her level and she stepped forward, her tiny fingers tracing my cheeks.

"You cry?" She frowned with worry. "Momma, she sad?"

"She's happy baby," Kyla knelt down between us, "this is Ashley, your cousin."

"And Spencer's girlfriend." Hannah threw in with a wide smile.

"Hi." Cailyn smiled and she resembled a small Kyla with green eyes.

"Ashley?" I stood up to find Anton standing by the tree. "Are you still doing the mean flips off the slopes with your board?"

"Oh God," I blushed, "I haven't done that in a while."

"Wow." Anton smiled and licked his lips. "My grandparents talk about that a lot and they showed me pictures of some competitions. I heard you're pretty bad ass, is that true?" He gave me a boyish grin.

"It is true." I winked and smirked. "Anton Spencer Dennison, you were just a newborn the last time I saw you."

I didn't know what to expect when I was faced with part of my family again. I wasn't sure how to act but everything seemed to have snapped into pieces perfectly.

The day seemed to have lapped together perfectly. Glen and Aiden were helping Anton set up his new game system from Paula and Arthur, Hannah and Cailyn were playing with Barbies at the dining room table, Paula and Arthur were making appetizers and I found myself on Spencer's lap in her bedroom with Kyla sitting against the headboard.

"I'm excited to meet Dylan," Kyla grinned, "she seems like a real cutie in the phone calls we get."

"She's a Davies," Spencer kissed my chin and played with my fingers, "she's just like Ashley only really tiny."

"Aww," Kyla gushed, "I'm so scared of Cailyn growing up. She's been my doll for five years now."

"Anton's really tall." I said with wide eyes. "Where'd he get that height thing from?"

"Probably my Dad's side." Kyla shrugged. "He's already on the high school basketball team."

"Wow," I smiled, "that's awesome Kyla."

"Aiden's happy about that but he assures Anton that if he doesn't want to play anymore, just say the word. I guess he's afraid that since he never lived his dream of being a star in basketball it'd come across as 'parental pressure' or something." Kyla smiled softly. "He's a really great Dad."

Spencer filled me in on the fact that Mr. and Mrs. Woods never did come around to their own daughter. Not until Cailyn was born and that was when they tried to butt their heads into the Dennison's life but the only thing Kyla showed them was the door, which she slammed in their faces.

I hoped they would've at least come around because parents don't last forever. Neither do children or anyone and I learned that the hard way. I gave my parents so much crap to deal with when I was younger but thankfully we worked them out before they passed away.

I sighed and closed my eyes. The subject was a touchy matter for me but it felt good knowing I had more than Spencer's support. She'd already held me countless of times when I cried over the loss of them, the loss of Dylan and the loss of her. I wasn't going to let anything happen like that again.

Which would be why I hadn't touched a drop of alcohol since that first time I stepped into the rehab centre.

I at least felt proud of myself.

"Girls?" Paula poked her head through the door. "Mini Spencer and Mini Ashley have arrived."

Kyla laughed and hopped up off the bed. "I'm excited!"

I got up off of Spencer's lap and she stopped me gently with her forehead pressed against my own. "I love you Ashley Davies. I love you so much and you have no idea how proud I am of you."

I blushed and instead of saying anything, I captured her lips in a soft, slow kiss. "Thank you."

"Moms!!!!" Lucas burst through the door and skidded to a stop when she saw us kissing. "My eyes!" She slammed the door shut and ran back downstairs.

Spencer laughed and laced her fingers with mine. "I think that's our cue to head downstairs."

I nodded.

That was also my cue to gather up Lucas and start working on my plan.

My plan to forever change The Carlin family.

--

**Next time in Points Underneath:**

_"Can you imagine what it would've been like if they all grew up together?" Spencer sat down beside me on the couch as we watched Dylan, Hannah and Cailyn colour while Lucas and Anton played a game on his game system._

_"God, it'd be like our group all over again." Kyla snorted from her side of the couch. "Of course with less drama because they're all related."_

_Aiden chuckled. "Yea, that is true."_


	88. In Need Of A Cool Off

**67.1 - In Need Of A Cool Off**

**Ashley's PoV**

Aiden had been really great with me and Dylan. His daughter Cailyn idolized Dylan and followed her around like a lost puppy. We found it adorable and my daughter didn't seem to mind. She was so afraid that Anton and Cailyn wouldn't like her but it was quite the opposite.

Anton was impressed with his cousins' hockey skills. He played for fun with his friends but never joined a team. I heard that Lucas always managed to beat him on a game of one on one so when Dylan joined in the game, he was pretty much defeated.

"Can you imagine what it would've been like if they all grew up together?" Spencer sat down beside me on the couch as we watched Dylan, Hannah and Cailyn colour while Lucas and Anton played a game on his game system.

"God, it'd be like our group all over again." Kyla snorted from her side of the couch. "Of course with less drama because they're all related."

Aiden chuckled. "Yea, that is true."

"Not that it stopped drama the first time." Spencer raised an eyebrow between me and Aiden.

"Hey, it was your fault." I scowled and looked over at Aiden for support.

"It was not!" Spencer looked shocked when Aiden agreed with me. "How was it my fault?"

"You're hot?" Aiden raised an eyebrow and was smacked in the stomach by Kyla. "I meant you were hot?"

"Oh if you wanna put the blame on how I look, go after my parents." Spencer nodded firmly and laced her fingers through mine. "Right baby?"

I just smiled back and kissed her cheek. "So, do you mind if I steal Lucas away for a bit later?"

Lucas heard her name and instantly paused the game while scrambling over to the couch. I placed my hand on her shoulder and squeezed it, sharing a small knowing smile.

"Yea mom, please?" Lucas pouted and I noticed a look of curiousity spread over Spencer's face. "She promised me that she'd take me out to eat, just the two of us and then we ended up here instead, so please?"

Spencer chewed on her bottom lip and smirked. "I don't know why you have to ask to take your own daughter out somewhere."

"Awww!" Kyla and Aiden sighed and clutched their hearts.

Lucas just beamed and stood up, throwing a pillow at the back of Anton's head. "Sorry loser, I'm going out with Momma for a bit, I'll kick your butt later."

Anton snorted and reset the game. "Whatever Carlin, I'll kick your butt one of these days."

My heart swelled over the 'Momma' part and Spencer pulled me in for a kiss.

"Will we be expecting you back for dinner?"

"Definitely." I nodded and was being pulled up by a hyper eleven year old.

"Can I come?" Dylan stopped colouring and stood up to grab Lucas' hand. "Please?"

Lucas and I shared a look before the miniature Spencer nodded and whispered something in Dylan's ear. I watched Dylan's eyes go wide and she pinky promised her sister the silent agreement and ran towards the door to grab her coat and boots.

"So everyone gets to go but me?" Spencer came up behind me and nuzzled my neck, placing a soft kiss there.

I smiled and turned around, gently cupping her cheeks and kissing her lightly. "The girls and I need some time to get to know each other without the head Carlin wanting to hog the limelight."

Spencer frowned in mock-offence and then grinned. "Have fun and drive safe."

"Always babe." I kissed her quickly and then joined the girls at the door. "We'll probably be about an hour or so."

"Dinner's at five, don't be late!" I heard Paula yell from the kitchen. Spencer and I shared a laugh while she rolled her eyes.

"See you soon."

"Soon." Spencer sighed and squeezed my hands before letting go.

"Ugh, come on Momma!" Lucas tugged on me again and Dylan waved bye to Spencer.

--

**Alex's PoV**

"What made you come here for a visit?" I asked Carmen as she sat down at my kitchen table with a beer in her hand.

"Everyone I practically know in Kenora is all here." She smirked. "I could hang out with Chase and Eph, but they're married so how much fun would that be?"

"I don't know," Sammy cut in with a sly grin gracing her features, "you seem pretty into them. Somehow I doubt you hanging out there with them all alone would bother you in any way."

"All right," Carmen grabbed Sammy's hand and squeezed it, "you caught me. I just wanted an excuse to come see you."

I had to admit that even though Carmen and Sammy were dating, the fact that I was able to be the first person to spend with Sam since she got back from New Zealand – it was a more than honourable feeling. I watched the two share a gaze and I averted my eyes while swallowing the rest of my beer before getting up to grab another.

"You're so corny." Sam sighed and I heard a kissing noise and rolled my eyes.

It wasn't like Sammy was mine to be jealous over, right? But she confessed everything she was feeling for me the night before and was now making out with her girlfriend under my roof.

Yes, I was aware I needed to grow up but it all seemed unfair to me.

If anything, I wish Tracey were around so I didn't have to feel so alone.

"So when will you be heading back to work?" I asked Carmen nicely, referring to her hockey career.

"In about three weeks." Carmen smiled softly. "It's nice to have some time off and not think about all the hard work and travelling, but I guess I miss it."

I knew Spencer missed it a lot more. Her accident that caused her knee to snap cost her, her whole hockey career but she bounced back and decided to Coach, keeping it in her system.

"And when will you be touring again?" Carmen asked me, her perfect eyebrow raising slightly.

"February." I shifted my gaze towards Sammy. "I'll be going down to Australia to kick off the World Tour."

"Oh really?" Sammy smiled genuinely and licked her lips before taking a sip of her vodka cooler, "which area? I'll be doing some pieces in Melbourne and Sydney in February."

I knew that already because she told me that it was something she was extremely looking forward too. "Sydney will be the main spot. I'll probably do three shows before starting off onto the travelling part."

"Will Tracey be with you?" Sam asked.

I shook my head and took a sip of my beer again. "Nah, she likes to be with me on the tour but if it's going to start the moment she gets her time off, I doubt she'll want to travel more."

"That's a shame," Carmen shrugged softly, "you two will most likely just miss each other when the time comes."

"It always seems to be that way." I nodded slowly and then the room became quiet. I slapped the table and forced a small smile, "but we always manage somehow to spend time together."

Sammy's blue eyes caught mine and I couldn't tear my own away from hers. Then I felt her hand on my knee and she squeezed gently. "It'll work out."

I managed to nod dumbly and felt Carmen's grey eyes on me. I closed my eyes briefly before biting my bottom lip and standing up. "It's late, I think I should try and get some rest. I never know when Tracey will make it back and I don't want to be drunk or tired for the welcome home part."

Carmen finally cracked a smile and gave me a high five. "Yea, I should get Sammy out of your hair. She's been taking all of your alone time away."

"I didn't mind." I said with a soft smile. "Sam's great company."

"The best." Sam grinned but allowed her arm to snake around Carmen's waist. "Get some rest; I'd hate to tell you that you look like shit one of these days."

"Not possible," I smirked, "I'll always be hot to you."

"Okay," Carmen laughed and ushered Sammy towards my front door, "with the heat you two stir up in a room, I'm going to start to think there's something going on."

"Ha, Samantha wishes." I quirked an eyebrow and leaned against the wall in my foyer. "Don't you?"

"In your dreams, Alexis." Sammy stared at me for a few seconds before opening the door to allow the cold winter air come in. "Cool off for a bit." She winked and grabbed Carmen's hand, tugging her outside. "I'll call you tomorrow."

"Sounds good." I swallowed and when the door was shut, I pressed my forehead against it and tried to contain the speeding pace my heart was making. I wasn't even aware of it until the couple was out of sight.

"Get a fucking grip, Alex." I whispered and turned off the lights downstairs.

A nice hot bath was in order. Maybe I'd be able to figure _something_ out.

--

**Next time in Points Underneath:**

_"My parents realized who your parents were and forbid me to hang out with you or them."_

_"Oh." Wow, hi heart, laying on the floor of the Dodge Charger. "Yea, well that does suck."_

_"You didn't think I'd fall for their bullshit, did you?" Eliza looked at me briefly before we turned into the parking lot of Tim Hortons. "Please Jai, I really like you and it'll take a lot more than my parents telling me I can't be near you, to make me stop seeing you."_


	89. Troubled Teens

_I figured a chapter with Jaiden couldn't hurt ... she's quickly becoming my new Samantha Taylor. Only without the Salex drama. Ha! _

_Jaiden, **teenage** Jaiden is mine but I have to be honest or else my wife might SUE me, but little Jaiden is technically hers. I burrowed, signed a contract and everything... okay, not really; but I can't take credit for little Jaiden. However, the hot teenage Jaiden is definitely mine (and Eliza's...for now)_

**67.2 - Troubled Teens**

**Jaiden's PoV**

"Oh stop being a drama queen." My Mom sighed and sat down on my bed. "So you sprained your wrist and can't play hockey for a bit, it'll just give you less of an excuse to avoid homework."

She sucked.

"You suck." I murmured and looked at my poor wrapped up hand.

"Chase, lay off the girl." My other mother plopped down beside me and gave me a wicked smile. "This sprained wrist thing, think of it as more of an opportunity to see Eliza."

Okay, Ephiny Wynters was officially the coolest mother in the world. Nothing against the blonde one giving death glares towards the parent beside me.

"Well she does have a point." I sat up, all of a sudden sounding chipper.

"Eph!" My blonde mom threw her hands up in the air. "Not everyone thinks about women and sex like you do."

"Not true," I frowned, butting in, "Carmen always thinks about women and sex."

"Carmen doesn't count hon, now let the mommies continue this argument." Mom scolded lightly.

"Sure," I shoved the brunette off my bed and pointed to the door, "this is my room so continue away from me."

"Seriously Chase?" I heard my mother scoff. "Carmen's seriously human and your type. I bet you have a small crush on her."

"Out." I laughed as my parents carried on with their argument in the hallway.

Soon they'd be having sex somewhere.

Fuck me that thought was gross.

I grabbed my wallet and keys, needing to be out of the house before any of the ... noise damaged me more than it already had in the past seventeen years.

My parents were seriously deranged but I loved them all the same. They were well respected business owners and popular with just about everybody in town.

I yelled that I was going out for a bit and when I didn't get a response, I took that as a sign to get a move on before the house started to shake. Gross right? I mean, that was my parents I was talking about – but oddly enough, I was used to it.

Still didn't helped the 'ew' factor.

I threw my small messenger bag in the back seat of my mom's old Dodge Charger and started it up. My phone started vibrating and I noticed the number was 'unknown'.

Eh, I'd take a chance.

"Who are you?" I answered casually.

Warm laughter floated through the line and my heart skipped. _"Hello to you too, Jaiden."_

"Eliza!" I squeaked and shook my phone, not believing it was her who just dialled my phone number – it wasn't like she hadn't before. "Hey, what's up?" Yea, that was me acting 'cool.'

"_The bitter cold."_ She murmured and her friendly voice was gone. _"Are you busy? Should I not have called?"_

"No no," I said hurriedly, "I was actually just leaving to go for a ride. You know, my parents are being so … disgusting."

"_Huh,"_ Eliza hummed and then I heard a loud noise. It sounded like a semi driving by or something.

"Where are you?" I asked concerned.

"_Redden's?"_ She answered quietly. That was a small convenient store about fifteen minutes out of town. Eliza only lived about ten. _"I was hoping I'd catch them before they closed and now I'm freezing my ass off, talking on this piece of shit pay phone."_

"Oh," I frowned and started to pull out of the driveway, "well hang tight, I'll come to get you."

"_No, you don't have too."_ Eliza breathed. _"I just wanted to see how you were."_

"Lize, why are you calling me on a pay phone anyway? Last time I checked, you had a phone in your own house."

"_Yea, about that,"_ she laughed nervously, _"my parental units and I aren't exactly speaking at the moment and I needed a breather."_

"So," I sighed and clutched my phone tightly, "I'll be right there and if you want to talk about it, we can. I'll play the good friend role, and listen."

"_Thank you."_ Eliza said softly.

I didn't let her get off the phone with me until I was getting closer to Redden's. The place was in the middle of nowhere with nothing but trees and wolves surrounding the area. I didn't feel safe with her walking around after dark.

I pulled up and she ran towards the car, hopping in with her teeth chattering. She was also lacking a winter coat. "Where the hell is your jacket?"

"At home!" Eliza shrugged and I noticed how sad her eyes were. "Look, I didn't even think before storming out of the house okay? I even left my cell there. My mom was playing her bitch role very well tonight and locked the door behind me as soon as I slammed it."

"Harsh." I frowned and pulled out onto the highway. "What happened?"

One thing I really liked about Eliza was that she was brutally honest with me. She could hide behind whatever façade she was putting on that day, but with me she liked to tell the truth. "You." She inhaled sharply and let it out with a rush, rubbing her hand down her face. "My parents realized who your parents were and forbid me to hang out with you or them."

"Oh." Wow, hi heart, laying on the floor of the Dodge Charger. "Yea, well that does suck."

"You didn't think I'd fall for their bullshit, did you?" Eliza looked at me briefly before we turned into the parking lot of Tim Hortons. "Please Jai, I really like you and it'll take a lot more than my parents telling me I can't be near you, to make me stop seeing you."

I blushed and felt like a total ass. I told you she was always honest with me. "Well I really like you too."

"I know," she smirked, "you don't hide it well."

I raised my eyebrows and started to laugh. "Okay, am I that transparent?"

"Maybe I just study you more than I would care to admit?" Eliza grinned sheepishly and we both got out of the vehicle.

I bought her coffee and a donut while we sat and talked about everything. I felt it was okay to really spill things out about my life and for someone who acted so shy when we first met, she was asking some pretty personal questions – not that I minded.

"You've been with guys before?" She looked at me slightly shocked.

"Two." I shrugged. "My last boyfriend was a total jerk though. He'd get off on my parents making out."

"Gross." Eliza scrunched up her face and laughed. "Well I haven't been with a guy and I don't plan on it either."

"Good, don't." I snickered and took a sip of my coffee. "Why don't you stay at my place tonight?"

"Right." She snorted. "I'm sure our parents would love that."

"Well, I'll sleep on the couch and you can take my bed." I shrugged and watched her blow into her own coffee cup.

"My parents also want me to transfer out of music class." Eliza mumbled heavily. "I hate them, you know? The one passion I have and they try to take it away from me."

"Why would they want you out of music class? Is the music some sort of worshipping act for the lesbian God?" I raised an eyebrow.

"They saw Miss Davies and Spencer kissing in front of the school. They asked me about her tonight and I mentioned she was my music teacher and now they want me out." Liza scratched her forehead and shrugged out of her heavy coat. "I told them it wasn't contagious but even if it were, I wouldn't be affected because I'm already 'one of them.'"

"I think you really should just spend the night at mine tonight. My parents will understand if we explain the situation – and then they'd sharpen their claws and plan for an attack." I said it as if it were no big deal but once my parents found out about why Eliza would be spending the night, they'd calmly tell us to head to bed and then plan something devious.

I knew what they'd do and then they'd get Spencer and Ashley involved as soon as they were back from vacation.

"Thank you," Eliza grabbed my hand and squeezed it, "for being here for me."

"Can't really keep me away, you've turned me to mush." I smiled and it warmed my heart to see her smile like that again. "You can go home tomorrow, let things cool off tonight."

"So, what made you want to play hockey?" She asked me, changing the subject.

"Chase, my mom," I grinned, "she was such a big fan. She never really played the sport but she knew everything about it."

"Cute." Eliza grinned and allowed her dimples to show. "I bet Spencer helped you a lot growing up."

"Oh yea," I smiled at the memories of Spencer teaching me different techniques, "she's like my older sister. I've always wanted an older sister and a younger sister."

"Technically you do Jai," she took a small bite out of her donut, "Lucas and Dylan."

"Oh," I frowned slightly and then smiled, shaking my head a bit, "Dylan yes, Lucas no."

"No?" She looked at me confused. "How can Dylan be but Lucas not?"

I shrugged and would've felt a little silly saying it but it was the truth, "she's more than a sister, she's my best friend. Like, that girl can give the most amazing advice and just be there for you. I don't know, she's always been my best friend."

"Aww cute." Eliza gushed and pinched my cheek, much to my scowling.

--

I had made a bed up on the couch and ran back upstairs to grab some extra pillows and blankets. It was a cold night and I was freezing. "Liza, are you okay with everything?" I knocked on my bedroom door, not wanting to walk in just in case she was changing or something.

The door opened and she bit her bottom lip. "Your parents are sweet," she whispered, "they already checked on me twice."

"Embarrassing, isn't it? They still do that to me." I laughed and stepped inside my own bedroom. "I just wanted to grab some pillows and a blanket from my closet."

"When are you going to ask me?" Liza sat down on the edge of my bed, tucking her curly hair behind her ears.

"Ask you what?" I stopped walking and faced her, furrowing my eyebrows.

"Kiss me Jaiden." Eliza stood up and crossed the room towards me.

Oh.

I didn't get the chance to kiss her because her lips were already on mine.

--

**Next time in Points Underneath:**

_"You knew?" I whispered._

_"Ash…" She squeezed my hand but I didn't squeeze back. _

_"You knew and you didn't tell me that my daughter was hurting that bad inside?" I got up. "For Gods sake, Spence! You should've told me. I could've helped her through those hard nights, it was hard enough I wasn't there for her when she's living the reality." My voice wavered slightly and rose a little bit. _


	90. Tears of Self Deprecation

**_An intense moment... I don't own SoN! Thank you all for the kind words, reading and reviews! You're the reason I'm keeping this alive._**

**68.1 - Tears of Self-Deprecation**

**Ashley's PoV**

"Mommy?" I heard Dylan speak softly as she walked into Spencer's childhood bedroom quietly. I put down the small load of laundry I did on the bed, and took in her sad face.

"Baby, what's wrong?" I knelt down in front of her and she shrugged, letting herself fall onto my lap and her small arms wrapped around my neck. "Hey," I cooed softly and got her to look at me, "is everything okay?"

"I've missed you." Dylan finally whispered and I noticed tears were starting to gather up in her eyes. "When you were gone, I wasn't very happy."

I closed my eyes and held her tighter, my own eyes watering slightly. "I know baby and I am so sorry."

"It's okay," she looked around the bedroom before her eyes darted down towards her lap, "I need to tell you something and you aren't going to like it."

I tucked a few stray curls behind her ears, "you can tell me anything, you know that."

Dylan nodded and bit her bottom lip before taking a deep breath. "The past couple of nights I've been having really bad nightmares. I think it's because I was treated really bad at my last home."

"What?" I whispered, broken. I knew Alex had mentioned that Dylan had it hard but as a mother, I really didn't want to believe that someone would hurt my little girl.

"They hurt me and never let me go to school or talk at the dinner table while the others kids got too. They said that you were something really bad and you probably deserved to be messed up." Dylan was shaking and my heart shattered as her body wracked full of sobs.

"Oh God Dylan." I cried and clutched her close to me. We were on the bedroom floor for who knows how long and I allowed myself to feel guilty and responsible for allowing Dylan experience any of that.

I needed to make it better and I didn't know how.

"So when I met Spencer, I knew things would be better," she pulled back, wiping her eyes. "She took me for ice cream that day, I met Lucas and I got to sleep in my own bed with actual blankets and not just sheets."

Even though she was smiling, I couldn't stop the millions of thoughts storming through my brain. The family who took care of her better be thankful for their lives because if I ever crossed paths… we wouldn't go there.

"I'm so sorry baby." I whispered into her hair.

"Dylan?" Lucas came into the room and immediately frowned when she noticed us on the floor with tears in our eyes. "What's wrong?" She rushed towards us with a worried look.

"I told Momma about the bad nightmares." Dylan whispered.

"Oh." Lucas sank down on the floor and grabbed Dylan's hand. "I was going to ask if you wanted to go with Carmen and Sam to the movies? Is that okay Momma?" She blinked her grey eyes at me. "Mom already said it was fine but I wanted to ask my sister to tag with me."

I smiled softly and kissed Lucas on the forehead. "You two go and have fun."

Dylan scrambled out of my lap and threw her arms around my neck. "Thank you for listening."

"Dyl," I whispered, "I'm your mother. I will listen to whatever you have to say and not judge. I love you."

"I love you too." She grinned slightly and then was out of the bedroom in a flash with Lucas trailing behind her.

I sighed and closed my eyes. I couldn't help but feel all the past emotions take control. I couldn't help but relive those awful memories when I had the accident that changed my life for good.

"Baby?" I never even heard her walk into the room, let alone kneel down in front of me. "Ash?"

I opened my eyes to see her staring at me intently.

"You're crying." Spencer frowned in concern and wiped the tears away from my cheeks.

I could only nod and tried to look away from her so I could compose myself but she held my face in her hands tightly. I had no choice but to speak. "Dylan just told me about her past homes." I sighed shakily.

"Oh." Spencer ran a hand through her hair and slide down beside me, her hand laced with mine. "Yeah, I just really hope her nightmares go away knowing that you're aware and can protect her."

I frowned and stared at her. "You knew?" I whispered.

"Ash…" She squeezed my hand but I didn't squeeze back.

"You knew and you didn't tell me that my daughter was hurting that bad inside?" I got up. "For Gods sake, Spence! You should've told me. I could've helped her through those hard nights, it was hard enough I wasn't there for her when she's living the reality." My voice wavered slightly and rose a little bit.

Spencer shook her head and bit her lip. "I couldn't tell you."

"Oh don't you dare pull an 'Alex' move and tell me it wasn't your place! You're a mother, you should know!" I backed away from her a little bit, noticing the hurt look cross her features. I closed my eyes and exhaled. "Sorry, I didn't mean that."

"I wasn't going to say that." Spencer said seriously, her own voice on the verge of rising. "I wanted to tell you but you know what? Dylan was the one that asked me not too, okay? She wanted to be the one to tell you when she was ready. I wasn't going to push her. She may be smart for her age and has been through a lot, but she's still just a little girl." She sat down on the corner of her bed and picked at her nails. "Trust me, I wanted to tell you, Ash. I would never keep anything from you, especially when it involves our daughters."

Well didn't I feel like an ass. I was always one for jumping the gun before facts were thrown at me.

It was a Davies trait that I quickly despised when I was younger; even more so after I met Spencer in high school.

I winced and rubbed my temples before making quick steps towards her. "Shit Spence, I'm sorry."

Spencer sighed heavily and shrugged. "I know that you're still very angry at yourself for what happened Ash, but in some way, you have to stop dwelling on it. You have Dylan back in your life, you have your daughter and with her telling you, means that she trusts you to keep her safe. She missed you and she missed that comfort so don't go getting all self-deprecating on us or yourself, not now."

"That whole counselling thing works for you." I whispered and she cracked a small smile. "I'm sorry I went all… seventeen on you. I guess I thought you were keeping it from me to protect me."

"You don't need protection." Spencer whispered, her hands pulling me closer as I stepped in between her legs, looking down at her. "You're a full grown woman who has learned from her mistakes. Dylan looks up to you baby, big time. I think her telling you was a huge deal for you both. This is where you two will start to heal _together_." I smiled at her and crawled onto her lap, wrapping my legs around her waist.

"I'm so glad I have you," I whispered, "you keep me sane."

"Really?" Spencer raised an eyebrow, leaning back a bit. "You kinda bit my head off back there."

I could tell she was teasing but I still felt bad. "I know and I'm sorry. Thank you for wanting to tell me."

I felt her hands trail up my back and into my hair, our lips meeting in a sweet embrace. I moaned softly as her tongue made a pass at my lower lip. I couldn't help but grant her permission.

The kiss was passionate and sweet.

"Ugh." We heard a sigh from the doorway. "It's like high school all over again." Alex smirked and made her way inside.

Spencer and I did nothing to untangle ourselves. "What do you want?" Spencer mumbled, her lips finding my chin briefly.

"Well I was wondering if you'd like to come with me and Glen to the movies?" Alex stood in the middle of the room and laughed. "But I can tell you're a little busy so I'll just tell him no."

"Wait." I got up off of Spencer's lap, kissing the cute frowned creasing the middle of her forehead. "I think we should."

"Seriously?" Spencer threw in there, looking down at her lap in disbelief. "You're going to give up hot semi make-up sex and spend the night out with my siblings?"

Alex snorted and wrapped an arm around my waist. "She never could resist me."

I tensed, thinking it'd be a sore subject but to my surprise, Spencer laughed and rolled her eyes. "Bitch please, she was totally screaming my name last night."

"Yea," Alex made a face and stepped away, "I heard."

"Wow, all the way from your house? What big ears you have." Spencer ruffled Alex's hair while grabbing my hand and walking out of her bedroom.

"Spencer!" Alex shouted and kicked the back of her sister's leg. "You will not do that again, you hear?"

"I heard." Spencer mocked. "Doesn't mean I'll listen."

"Are you two fighting again?" Mr. C laughed as we made our way into the living room.

"She started it." Spencer pouted and picked up Hannah. "Are you coming to the movies as well?"

"No," Paula smiled from her place on the couch, "Han is gonna stay with us. Glen thinks it'd be nice for her to be around us alone."

"Aww," I cooed and tickled her belly, "someone's sleepy."

"Not." Hannah fought through her heavy eyelids.

"Come on Princess," Glen swooped her up in his arms, causing her to giggle, "let's get you cleaned up so Nana and Grandpa can read you a bedtime story."

"Belle!" She grinned, clapping her hands.

"Aww Glen, isn't Beauty and The Beast your favourite Disney movie too?" Spencer teased.

"Spencer, be quiet." Glen said while smiling and walking away.

--

**Next time in Points Underneath:**

_Lucas and I made eye contact before pumping fists. "If I win, I get to join you and Mom tonight." She whispered._

_"Lucas..." I warned._

_"What?" She whispered. "Think of it as… a live show. It'll be perfect."_


	91. Last Day of the Year

**_So I just wanted to throw out there that everyone has a right to their own opinion and I'm a strong believer in that. However, I think breaking down someone's confidence in their talent by making unnecessary comments regarding either the author or the fic itself is stepping over a line. I respect everyone who reads and take the time out to review, so thank you to you wonderful people. _**

**_If you don't like any fic you are reading (or what's happening), then don't read. Simple as that._**

**_Enjoy!_**

**68.2 - Last Day Of The Year**

**Spencer's PoV**

I pulled back, breathing heavily and hovering over Ashley's writhing body. I groaned when she drew her nails down my back, a string of useless words falling from her lips.

I withdrew my fingers from her and collapsed, laughing softly. "Good morning." I whispered, nuzzling her neck with my lips.

Ashley nodded and moaned when I adjusted myself more comfortably between her legs. "Good indeed," she finally whispered back. I closed my eyes briefly when she tucked strands of hair behind my ear. "What a way to wake up on the last day of the year." She giggled.

"I agree." I sighed with a cheeky grin and kissed her again.

"Unfortunately we can't stay in bed all day." Ashley moaned lightly when she stretched her muscles. "But know that I'd love too." Her black desired eyes blinked back lazily at me.

"So? Nana and Grandpa wouldn't mind spending time with their granddaughters..." I let the sentence hang and she just laughed at me. "What?" I pouted.

"Spencer Dylan Carlin," she poked me in the sides with her slender fingers, "are you trying to propose we lock ourselves in here all day and proceed to have mind blowing year-end sex?"

I sat up and straddled her, looking quite seriously at her. "Why yes, yes, that is _exactly_ what I'm proposing."

_Hook._

Ashley sat up, her arms immediately wrapping around my bare waist, her lips moving slowly over my collarbone and up my neck. "I'd love that," she purred in my ear and tugged on the lobe with her teeth, earning a moan from me, "but we can't."

"Aaaash," I whined dramatically and pushed her back down onto the bed, my hair curtaining us, "please? I'll make it worth your while."

_Line._

"You always do." Ashley whispered huskily and wrapped her hands into my hair, pulling me down in a forceful kiss.

_And sink into her._

I wasted no time allowing my fingers to trail back down the same path they had a few minutes prior. Ashley panted, her legs falling apart just as easily.

_Scor-_

"MOM!" Lucas' voice could be heard in the hallway.

"Fuck." Ashley cursed in frustration and threw a pillow over her heated flushed face.

"I guess mind blowing year-end sex will have to wait." I whispered against her lips, moving away from her.

"MOMMA!" Dylan's voice was now coming closer and soon hands were pounding on the bedroom door.

"I'm gonna go tie them up in a closet." Ashley pushed herself up off the bed, running her fingers through some sexy JBF hair. She was sexy as hell when she was horny and frustrated. "This is your fault."

I gasped and threw her some clothes to put on. "How is this my fault?"

"You had to be all sexy with your pouting and whining and year-end sex sounded really good." Her eyes sparkled and she laughed a little. "Wow, I'm turning into you."

"Hey!" I smacked her on the arm lightly and kissed her cheek. "You should be so lucky."

"Are you two up or what?!" Lucas sighed and I heard soft giggles come through the door.

As soon as I opened the bedroom door once Ashley was fully dressed, Lucas and Dylan came tumbling in and onto the floor. "That's what you get for eavesdropping." I raised a playful eyebrow and helped them up.

"Lukey said we might go sliding!" Dylan got up off the floor and ran to Ashley's side. "Is it true?"

"It's tradition." Lucas smiled. "A Carlin never breaks tradition."

"It's true." I shrugged and watched as Ashley glared at me. I was in trouble for working her up and not finishing the job. "Where's Nana and Grandpa?" I asked Lucas.

"Fixing breakfast. Uncle Glen is trying to find all the sliding gear and Aunt Alex is in the basement, playing her guitar." She smiled proudly at me. Lucas was always one to know who was where and what they were doing.

Which kind of freaked me out a little bit.

"Is Auntie Kyla and Uncle Aiden coming?" Dylan asked almost shyly. She was getting used to calling all the family members just as Lucas called them.

"Probably." Luc shrugged and looked over at Ashley. "Nice hair Momma." She giggled and grabbed Dylan's hand. "Let's go and call Anton, he'll want to come regardless."

Once the girls were out of sight, I found myself pushed up against the wall. "You are in so much trouble Carlin." Ashley whispered.

"Yea?" I smirked. "You gonna punish me?"

"Ugh." She pushed herself away from me with a grunt. "I'm going to shower and maybe if you're lucky, I'll give you a play by play." Ashley was out of the bedroom and into the bathroom so fast, I barely had time to release the growl that threatened to leave me.

Play by play. I was getting lost in that fantasy alone before I shook myself out of it.

I needed to shower as well but I had to wait until she was finished.

Damn her.

Damn me for being so insatiable.

I found myself sitting on the large freezer in the basement, attempting to cool off, listening to Alex strum away at her guitar.

"Maybe you should leave out that last chord." I offered with a shrug of my shoulders when I found her struggling slightly with her writing.

Alex looked at me briefly before penciling out the chord, trying again. She grinned when she found it worked. "I don't get why you never even tried to get your foot into the door with this music business."

"That's your thing." I laughed and shook my head. "I wouldn't be able to do it for a living."

Alex placed her guitar down and hopped up on the freezer with me, her grey eyes scanning the room. "I'm sorry for everything Spence." She finally whispered. "I know you said you wanted to just let it go but I really need you to believe that I'm sorry."

I patted her back gently. "I know you are."

Alex bit her bottom lip and turned towards me. "I um, I have a confession to make."

"What?" I asked hesitantly, not sure whether to be worried or not.

She laughed a little before shaking her head. "It's hard because once I say this, there's no going back. I'm not sure if I'm ready to go there yet."

"Aly, what is it?" I asked gently.

She inhaled deeply. "I'm confused."

I tilted my head to the side slightly. "Confused about what?"

"Sammy." Alex whispered and frowned, swallowing hard. "I don't know if it's because we've been apart for so long and it feels amazing to be near her again, or if I'm starting to realize the mistake I made by ... letting her go."

"Jesus Alex." I whispered just as softly and wiped a few tears that spilled from her eyes. I could see the confusion written across her face.

"You're the only one who knows." She finally spoke after a few minutes of silence. "I miss Trace, I do."

"I know." I nodded and allowed her to curl up in my embrace.

"I just don't know what to think. I don't want to ruin lives of anyone, you know? Tracey has been acting off lately and after promising me she'd be here for the holidays if I took time off touring, she ends up wanting to head to the States to play." Alex sighed. "I mean it's her career so it shouldn't upset me."

I shrugged and tangled my fingers through her silky hair. "Maybe it's the holiday blues. I mean, if you think about it, aside from Glen, you're the only one who doesn't have a significant other. Maybe Sam just brings that familiar feeling back."

Alex smiled slightly and nodded. "I guess."

I sighed a bit. "It's not that easy, is it?"

"No." She jumped off the freezer and grabbed her guitar. "I just wish Tracey would come home, even if it were for a few days." Alex blinked. "This is how they felt when I was away, wasn't it?"

"Probably." I managed a soft smile. "Look, try and push all that in the back of your mind. You're going to need the energy when it comes time to slide."

Alex immediately perked up and grinned. "I forgot that was today! Holy shit I forgot what today was!"

"Certainly not mind blowing year-end sex day." I mumbled and she raised an eyebrow. "I'm going to go see if Ash is done in the shower."

"Right." Alex smirked as we made our way upstairs.

--

**Ashley's PoV**

"So are you excited, Momma?" Lucas asked me while I tightened the straps on her snowboard foot bracers.

I grinned and stood up, adjusting my snow goggles and gloves. "Definitely."

"Are you nervous?" She questioned in a quieter voice while Alex and Spencer walked past us with their sleds being dragged behind them.

"Oh yea." I breathed and stepped onto my own snowboard, strapping myself in securely.

"Don't worry," Lucas squeezed my hand, "you have nothing to worry about. She's a love struck puppy."

I laughed and helped her place her goggles over her eyes. "Ever been snowboarding?"

"Nope." She grinned. "You're about to teach me."

"Take it easy on her," I heard Spencer say from behind us, "I don't want your Momma broken."

"Oh ha, funny Mom." Lucas rolled her eyes but remained smiling. "I'm a Carlin, I'll kick your butt down that hill even if this is my first time."

"Wow, I guess we'll test that challenge, won't we?" I adjusted myself on the hill.

"I mean it you girls, be careful!" Spencer said a little more firmly.

"Relax sis," Alex laughed, "Ashley snowboards Mount Everest compared to this bunny hill."

"Ash!" Anton smiled as he strapped himself in a snowboard, "let's see what you've got."

"Man, is this a race? I may talk big but I know I'll lose." Lucas pouted and I snickered.

"Oh let me in on this race!" Carmen lined up beside Anton.

"Great Ash, look what you started." Aiden and Kyla sat on the hill, playing with Cailyn and Dylan, helping them build snowmen.

"I'm putting my money on Lil Carlin," Alex nodded, "she'll have you three eating her snow shavings.

"I have to agree." Sammy laughed.

Lucas and I made eye contact before pumping fists. "If I win, I get to join you and Mom tonight." She whispered.

"Lucas..." I warned.

"What?" She whispered. "Think of it as… a live show. It'll be perfect."

I thought about it and figured with Glen and Aiden's help, I could make the live performance work. Having Lucas there wouldn't put a damper on my plans so I wasn't concerned about that.

"We'll talk about it when you win." I smirked.

"Yes!" She cheered silently.

"Ready boarders?" Sammy stood in front of us and waved her scarf in the air.

I rocked back and forth on the bank before taking off as soon as 'go' came out of Sam's mouth.

Lucas shot ahead of me, squealing all the way down the hill. I noticed Carmen was about to pass the smaller blonde so I cut her off, making her lose her balance, cursing as she fell.

Anton shot down passed me and the moment he went to look back, he wiped out, cursing too, as he went tumbling down the hill.

Lucas was gaining speed the steeper the hill became and I decided to stop for a few seconds, letting her get ahead even more, before continuing on my way.

"Oh my Lesbian God!" She laughed triumphantly and did a little dance. "I won! I won!"

"Lukey!" Dylan slammed the brakes on her GT and skidded into a snow bank before running towards her sister. "You won! What did you win?"

"Oh Momma knows." Luc threw me a wink.

"I think it's time for hot chocolate." Carmen spoke up, her hand securely in Sammy's. "Who's riding with me?"

"Me!" Lucas and Dylan screamed at the same time.

"Oh I see how it is." I teased them and grabbed their boards and GT, waiting for Spencer and Alex to reach the bottom of the hill.

"Johnny's?" Aiden suggested, holding his daughter in his arms.

"Heck ya!" Kyla smirked. "Just like the old days plus… a whole family."

"Momma?" Lucas tugged on my arm bent down so she could whisper in my ear. "So can I?"

"Of course." I whispered and kissed her cold cheek. "After that race, you deserve to tag along."

"You won't regret it!" She sang while running towards Carmen's rented vehicle.

"It was nice of you to let her win." Spencer breathed, coming up behind me. "Really sweet of you."

"Uh," I looked at her with a small smile, "I don't know what you're talking about."

"Come on Ash, I saw you stop half way down after Anton wiped out." Spencer smirked.

"Well did you see how excited she was that she won?" I said in awe. "Your girl makes me smile."

"Our girl." Spencer corrected with a kiss on the lips. "And yes, I did. What did you promise her?"

"What?" I raised an eyebrow. "Now I really have no idea what you're talking about. Alex, your sister is talking jibberish again."

"Uh huh." Alex nodded distractedly as she watched Sammy and Carmen's vehicle disappear. "I'm gonna head back to the house. Catch you guys later." She hugged us quickly and gathered up her stuff before taking off.

"What was that about?" I asked gently while Spencer carried a concerned look on her face.

"Alex being Alex." She sighed. "I never told you this but she's figured out that she isn't over her ex-girlfriend."

"Duh?" I smiled softly. "They're like Spencer and Ashley the second. I think they're meant to be."

"Ashley," Spencer shook her head with a smile, "I honestly think Alex doesn't know what she wants."

"Maybe so," I shrugged, "but her heart knows. It's up to her to follow it. Anyhow, it's not really our business to get into."

"Yea, you're right," Spencer opened the back of her Dad's Ford pickup and piled the rest of the sliding gear inside. "So what did you promise Luc?"

"Don't worry about it." I gave her a squeeze on the hip, bringing her cool lips to mine. "You'll find out soon enough."

"Oh God, should I be worried?" Spencer's eyes twinkled teasingly.

"Get in the truck and drive Carlin." I laughed.

--

**Next time in Points Underneath:**

_Tracey stared at the key momentarily before looking at me briefly. I bit my lip and smiled slightly. "What? I figured it couldn't hurt right? With me being here all alone and all..."_

_"Huh." She nodded slowly and made her way towards the door._

_Samantha winced and whispered an apology. "I didn't know me having a key was a secret."_

_"It's not." I sighed heavily and gently grabbed her arm. "I just never had the chance to tell her, that's all._"


	92. Please Spare Me

**_Regarding my last A/N... I wasn't just talking about this fic or myself. I have a few friends who write Spashley and other shippers that are getting the same heat. I just don't think it's entirely fair, that's all. You all are amazing and wonderful for your support! I hope I don't disappoint you._**

**_Enjoy!_**

**69.1 - Please Spare Me**

**Alex's PoV**

"Mom? Dad?" I threw my keys on the kitchen table and frowned, taking in the empty room. My parents usually joined us for a day of sliding but they both wanted to stay behind and set up for the New Year's party they were throwing for the family.

It wasn't every day you finally get all of your children and grandchildren under one roof.

I heard someone rustling in the living room and made my way in there. I swear to the Lesbian God herself, if my parents were going at it and I walked in on them, I'd curse her up and down ten times over.

"Mom? Dad?" I called out again, a little softer.

"I think they went to the corner store." I heard her voice and jumped when she appeared from the hallway. "They let me in because I don't have my house keys and you weren't home…"

"Tracey?" My heart started to pick up pace when I walked closer to her.

"Alex?" She teased lightly before I stepped in front of her. "Wow, you look really good."

"Thanks." I smiled almost shyly before taking her hands in mine. "You look amazing." And she did, her hair was down and framing her face perfectly. "When did you get in?"

"About an hour ago." She bit her lip. "I tried breaking into the house but it didn't go so well. I figured you'd be here but I wanted to shower and change first. I had two flights to catch to get here."

"Aw baby," I whispered with a smile, wrapping my arms around her waist, "you have no idea how good it is to see you again."

Tracey nodded. "I think I have a pretty good idea." She looked around and raised an eyebrow. "Where is everyone?"

"Johnny's." I mumbled. "I didn't really feel like sitting around eating fries and onion rings."

"Liar, you live for Johnny's food when you're home." Tracey smiled and squeezed my hand.

"Well now that you're here I definitely don't want to go." I brushed her loose curls away from her face. "I'd like to go home."

"Sounds good to me." She smiled and grabbed the bags that managed to go unnoticed when I first entered the house. I helped her pile them in the jeep and we silently made our way back to our home.

I figured she'd be hungry so I was deciding on what to make her for lunch when I felt warm hands slide under my shirt and a kiss pressed lightly on the back of my neck. "I think you need to follow me into the bedroom," Tracey whispered and I happily followed her.

Three and a half hours later, I was stepping out of a hot shower. I smiled and sighed, realizing that I had missed spending time alone with my fiancée. I missed feeling her and hearing her.

"Your mom just called," Tracey said, coming up behind me and placing the phone on the bathroom counter, "she wants to know if we'll be making it to the party because your dad pretty much made enough food to feed an army."

"He always makes more than enough food." I chuckled, brushing the last of the tangles out of my hair. I noticed she was already changed and ready to go. "I'm guessing since you distracted me from making you lunch, you're hungry and wanna go pronto?"

"Precisely." Tracey winked and grabbed her make-up bag before taking off towards the bedroom.

After I was changed and my make-up was applied, I sat in the kitchen waiting for Tracey to get off the phone with her parents.

"There you are!" Sammy flew into the house, throwing her set of keys in her pocket. "Paula figured you'd be here. I tried calling you a thousand times and you never answered your phone, I was getting worried."

"Hey, didn't I give you that key for emergencies only?" I quirked an eyebrow and flipped through a magazine.

"Well this is an emergency. It's the last day of the year and you're wanting to spend time alone in a place you said you didn't really care to spend alone time in!" Sam took a deep breath and exhaled slowly, sinking into a seat beside me. "What's up?"

"Oh, I was just-" I started to speak and Tracey rounded the corner.

"Sammy hey, I never even heard the door." My fiancée placed a kiss on my temple and grabbed her purse and coat.

"I actually never knocked." Sammy shrugged and grabbed the spare key. "Sorry for intruding."

Tracey stared at the key momentarily before looking at me briefly. I bit my lip and smiled slightly. "What? I figured it couldn't hurt right? With me being here all alone and all..."

"Huh." She nodded slowly and made her way towards the door.

Samantha winced and whispered an apology. "I didn't know me having a key was a secret."

"It's not." I sighed heavily and gently grabbed her arm. "I just never had the chance to tell her, that's all."

Samantha stepped ahead of me and walked past Tracey, telling us she'd meet us at my parents' house.

"Does Sam really need a key to our place, Alex?" Tracey finally spoke halfway down the driveway.

"I'll get it back, don't worry. I only gave it to her while you were away." I shrugged and stepped up into the driver side.

"Cause that sounds so much better," she laughed a little bit and shook her head.

Was she actually getting jealous?

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean for it to upset you." I placed a hand on her knee gently. "Really."

"It's okay, I mean, how would you feel if I gave a key to an ex-girlfriend?" Tracey brushed hair out of her eyes.

I swallowed and frowned. The thought didn't really bother me all that much. "Samantha isn't just an ex, you know that. She's my best friend, she's our friend."

"Yeah." She sighed and faced the window slightly. "I'm sorry, I don't know why I'm feeling jealous," her brown eyes looked at me, "it's not like me. I guess being away longer than usual is affecting me more than I thought."

"If it makes you feel any better," I murmured, "that was the first time she used it."

Tracey smiled a little. "Really?"

"Really."

"It does make me feel a little bit better." She grinned finally and grabbed my hand that was resting on the gearshift, squeezing a little.

"So, dare I ask how long you're back for?" I asked, turning down the highway. I could vaguely see Sam's rental ahead of us.

"I wasn't actually supposed to be taking a break," she grinned sheepishly, "but I felt bad for not being there with you for Christmas so I convinced coach for some time off."

"Thank you." I kissed her hand softly, paying attention to the road. "So when do you have to leave me again?" I pouted.

"Two days." Tracey sighed and frowned. "I know I suck but it's crunch time and-"

"I get it." I smiled softly. "The last thing I want is for you to feel like you have to explain your career to me and your time on and off Trace, I know how much you love hockey."

"I know but you're right, I should've been here when I was the one that convinced you to take time off of touring."

"Well this time off touring has been a blessing." I assured her. "Don't feel bad. I mean look at Spencer and I? Look at Ashley and I? I have nieces and a nephew I get to spend time with. Press I get to steer away from. Fans that really don't pay attention to me here in Midtown. I'm able to actually breathe."

"Is that a thank you?" Tracey leaned over the console and kissed my cheek.

"Thank you." I laughed and turned down my parents' street.

"And you and Sam seemed to have patched up things even more so." She pointed out a little bit. "Is she still with Carmen?"

I swallowed and put my jeep in park. "Yea." I nodded.

"Good for them." Tracey smiled and I could feel her studying my profile. I refused to look at her. "Or is that a bad thing?"

"Hey!" Carmen opened Tracey's door and hauled her in for a hug. "Holy shit I missed you, Trace. Spencer and I were just talking about rounding up a few hockey players tomorrow night, what do you say? You in?"

"Jesus Carm, she just got here. Let her breathe will ya?" I rolled my eyes while she sneered at me, her arm wrapped around Tracey's waist and dragging her towards the house.

"I take it she didn't like the fact that you gave me a key." Sammy stepped out of her vehicle and crossed her arms, leaning against the door.

"It's no big deal." I shrugged. "It's not like you were using it to sneak into my room the nights she was away."

Sammy smirked and raised an eyebrow. "Yea, cause that'd be a shame."

I shook my head and shoved her towards the house.

--

**Next time in Points Underneath:**

_"All I'm saying is I cannot believe you scored such a babe." Uncle Glen laughed, taking a sip of his beer._

_"Uncle, she's not mine and she's seventeen you perv." I stuffed the photo of Jaiden back in my bag._

_"Hey, I'd never go there but you have to admit, your taste in the ladies is almost as good as mine." He smiled teasingly and slid down the wall, sitting next to me in the hallway. _


	93. I'm Yours Too

**69.2 - I'm Yours Too**

**Ashley's PoV**

The large familiar house stared back at me. I sighed for the millionth time and glanced at the blonde in the passenger seat. "Do I have too?"

"They're your family." Spencer managed a soft smile. "Plus I think they'd love to meet Dylan and catch up with you."

Uncle Vic and Aunt Greta were on vacation when we first arrived in Midtown, but they had just gotten back and heard that I was in town. Apparently they begged and begged Aiden to get me to visit them.

I sat in their driveway, expecting them to come running out but I figured they were waiting for me to make the first move.

I hadn't seen them since my parents' funeral and that thought alone made me want to get all emotional again.

"I just don't know if I can handle all the tears. I haven't cried this much since..." I trailed off and sighed, already feeling my strong exterior crumble.

Spencer's hand was on my thigh, rubbing gently before catching my hand and kissing the back of my fingers. "I'll go in with you if you want me too."

"You will?" I whispered, scared-like.

"Come on, I bet they're going to flip when they see Dylan." Spencer turned her head around to find the nine year old passed out in the backseat. "It's not even dinner time yet, we must've really worn her out."

I unbuckled my seatbelt and got out of the vehicle. Opening up the back door, I shook Dylan lightly. "Baby Dyl," I whispered and she groaned, pouting a little. Spencer opened up the back door on the other side and smiled lightly. "How can she be so tired?"

"The girl has had so much excitement during our stay, I think it's all catching up to her." Spencer whispered softly, tucking strays of loose curly hair behind Dylan's ear. "Hey Dylan, wake up please."

A few seconds later, brown sleepy eyes locked on mine. "Momma? Where are we?"

"We're going to meet some very special people." I kissed her forehead. "Come on, I think you'll love them."

"Who?" She asked, hoping out beside me and yawning.

"Aiden's parents." Spencer grabbed her other hand. "Aunt Greta and Uncle Vic."

"Oh." Dylan smiled a little and remained quiet as we walked up the familiar pathway.

"They trimmed that big tree down by your bedroom window." Spencer mused, looking up.

"You lived here?" Dylan asked in surprise.

"I did," I smiled, "when Gramma and Grandpa went away for a bit while I was younger, they had me stay with Aiden. I met Spencer that year."

"Aww and you fell in love with Mom?" Dylan whispered, her cheeks flushing beat red while Spencer and I stared at her with shit eating grins. "Right?" She squeaked.

"Right," I whispered, "that was when I fell in love with your mom."

Spencer squeezed her hand and Dylan visibly relaxed. She was still blushing but knowing that we were more than happy that she finally called Spencer 'mom', she wasn't flinching or waiting for someone to yell at her.

"Oh God Spence, I don't know if I can do this." Panic set in so quick I barely had time to react to it.

"Yes you can," she squeezed my hand and kissed my cheek, "they're going to be so thrilled to see you baby. I promise."

It wasn't like I was afraid they'd be upset with me for being away for so long. I was just scared to feel some old familiar feelings I had when my parents were alive. Aunt Greta was so much like a Davies, I was afraid I'd break down.

Before I had a chance to really respond to Spencer, Dylan had stood on her tiptoes and pushed the door bell.

Spencer's hand on my back calmed me slightly but my heart beat wildly in my chest. I felt like passing out the moment I heard footsteps approaching quickly.

Time stood still momentarily when Aunt Greta swung the door open. I found myself staring into familiar brown eyes and I swallowed but immediately felt calm the moment I felt her arms wrap around me.

Her sob into my neck set me off and I was standing outside her door in the freezing cold, crying. It felt good to cry though; it felt like a weight was being lifted off my shoulders. Aunt Greta pulled back, wiping my face with her hands before wiping her own. "God you're so grown up now!"

I nodded, not yet able to find my voice.

"Hello Greta," Spencer smiled softly, her hand securely in Dylan's.

"It is so good to see you again Spencer." Aunt Greta hugged the blonde before her eyes finally drifted down to the smaller girl. "Aren't you just the most beautiful little girl." She knelt down and smiled through tears. "Your Gramma always said you were."

Dylan's eyes flashed slightly. "You knew my Gramma?" She whispered.

"God Ashley," Aunt Greta pulled us into a fierce hug, "never leave us again okay? We're your family, we'll do anything for you."

I could see Spencer from over the older woman's shoulder. She was smiling with tears forming in her own eyes. I couldn't help but smile back.

--

**Lucas' PoV**

"All I'm saying is I cannot believe you scored such a babe." Uncle Glen laughed, taking a sip of his beer.

"Uncle, she's not mine and she's seventeen you perv." I stuffed the photo of Jaiden back in my bag.

"Hey, I'd never go there but you have to admit, your taste in the ladies is almost as good as mine." He smiled teasingly and slid down the wall, sitting next to me in the hallway. "So why are you sitting here all alone while your cousins are kicking ass on the video game?"

I shrugged. "I don't know and you said a bad word." A smile tugged at my lips.

"Not falling for that," he raised an eyebrow, "your parents and Carmen probably give you more money than I ever got when I was your age."

"Okay, I'll let it slide this time." I poked his curly head with my finger. "Do you think you'll ever fall in love again?"

My Uncle Glen frowned and slouched a little bit more. "Maybe? I don't know. I think focusing on Hannah is what's best for me right now."

"This family has too many girls." I voiced out loud and he laughed, completely agreeing with me.

"I guess liking girls makes up for that." He threw me a wink and stretched. I didn't want him to leave yet. I grabbed his hand and tugged him back down. "Everything okay?"

"I have a secret." I whispered. "It's not a bad secret but I promised I wouldn't say anything." I held my breath.

"Well I think if it's a good secret, you should keep it. No harm in those kind." Uncle Glen ruffled my hair and scooped me up, carrying me into the living room with my cousins.

I heard the front door swing open and found myself flat on my back with Dylan hugging me. "Missed me?" I chuckled.

"They are so cool Lukey! Uncle Vic and Aunt Greta said that it's okay if I stay with them for a little bit in the summer when we visit Nana and Grandpa!" Dylan cried happily, bouncing around.

Mom and Momma walked in the house hand in hand with Uncle Vic and Aunt Greta following behind. I couldn't help but smile and jump up, giving them each a huge hug.

"Vic, Greta, come in! There's plenty of food." Grandpa smiled warmly, patting the top of my head.

"I think with everything we've been through this year and years before that, this family deserves to have a chance to heal together." Nana smiled and hugged Aunt Greta.

"Hey squirt, can I borrow you?" Momma nudged me and I nodded, following her into the hallway, avoiding my mom's curious glare. "Are you ready for tonight?"

"Am I ever!" I whispered excitedly. "How are you going to get me out of the house that late?"

"Oh sweetie, I'm a Davies, I have my ways." She winked and kissed my forehead.

"You're nervous." I pointed out at the shakiness of her hands when she cupped the side of my face.

"And you are way too smart for your own good." Her brown eyes twinkled. "Come on, let's go kick some video game butt."

"Momma?" I swallowed and looked down at my rainbow socked feet. "After, I mean, do you think maybe... I was doing some research and I was wondering," I took a deep breath, "if you could adopt me?"

"Luc..." she whispered in awe, tears already forming in her eyes. I had to swallow my own, fearing her answer. "You want me to adopt you?"

"I want to be Lucas Evelyn Carlin-Davies." I stated with confidence. "I want to be yours too."

"Oh baby," her arms were thrown around me and she nodded, "I'm yours too. I'll be more than happy to adopt you and make you mine as well."

"Mom's going to be insanely happy about this." I whispered with wide eyes, smiling like a crazy person.

"How about we do one surprise at a time, yea?" Momma stood up and held out her hand.

--

**Next time in Points Underneath:**

_"What happened between you two anyway?" Glen asked, his gaze drifting towards Aiden, who was telling him to shut up_

_"It's okay Aid," I patted his shoulder from where he was sitting; on the passenger side. "I was scared and ran away."_

_"What were you scared of?" Lucas asked quietly._

_"Not being enough for your mom. Maybe screwing it up or not being able to handle the distance between us when she went away for school." I said somewhat guiltily._

_"But if the distance kept you away, didn't it hurt more to walk away for good?" The small blonde raised her eyebrows to her hairline and then frowned in confusion._


	94. All I Ever Needed Was You

**_I have to say that I cannot take FULL credit for the last half of this chapter. My lovely wife threw the idea out there last summer (yes, this was planned that long ago), while we were driving 19hrs to Indiana from Fort Francis, Ontario. Obviously it didn't take her 19hrs to explain to me her thoughts but she deserves the credit and I give credit where credit is due. Yup, she's a romantic one! I just gave the idea a visual life!_**

**_You all will enjoy this, trust me._**

**70 - All I Ever Needed Was You**

**Ashley's PoV**

"What possessed you to do this?" Aiden huffed, unloading the back of his truck with my favourite piece of cargo.

"Lucas." I shrugged and she squawked.

"So not fair! Plus you know this is the best idea ever!" The smaller blonde adjusted her beanie cap and took another sip of her hot chocolate.

"You know my sister's gonna chew you out," Glen manoeuvred himself so he could help Aiden unload the 'cargo'. "You're leaving her alone with adults on New Years Eve."

"Relax, this will more than make up for it." Aiden groaned when the heavy item was placed down on the snowy ground. "Gotta say, I think I missed out on that whole 'romantic' Davies gene."

"Whatever," I smiled softly, "didn't you surprise Kyla with a trip to Maui?"

"True." His cocky manly smirk was back in place. "But I didn't do anything like this, Ash."

"Nah, I can't take the credit for this part." I smiled and nudged Lucas. "She was the brains behind the more technical operation."

"Just like her mom." Glen winked.

"Take a break guys, I have to figure out the lighting." I rubbed my hands together, the cold finally breaking through my excited yet nervous exterior. "Do you think I'm going overboard with the candles?" I asked Lucas, as she stared out towards the destination place where I'd make my move.

"Overboard with candles? You've been in our house right? Mom has candles everywhere. She gets in a bad mood when her little ones in the bathrooms run out of wick to burn." She grey eyes rolled slightly, but smirked.

"Oh God the time isn't slowing down." I whispered, noticing that I had less than an hour to set up the ice candles before sundown. "Here, go play with fire but no burning yourself." I tossed Lucas a lighter and sent her off to light the candles.

"Are you ready?" Aiden teased and threw his bulky arm around me. "Relax a little will you?"

"Yeah," Glen cracked his neck before grabbing the other side of the heavy item, "you know her answer already. Has she said no before?"

It took longer than I expected but over an hour and a half later, everything was set up perfectly. Lucas was in the truck warming up while I threw a blanket over the large item and then taking a picture with my camera. I just wanted everything to be perfect.

"So what are you going to tell Spencer when we get back?" Glen asked, watching the road as he drove.

"They were out of ice cream?" I raised an eyebrow and shrugged. "I'll tell her the truth. We went for a ride."

"That's half the truth." Lucas pointed out. "But she'll buy it and leave it at that."

"You know your mother pretty well, don't you?" I teased the blonde and she just smiled.

"I know that she's going to say yes." Lucas shrugged. "She loves you Momma, she doesn't ever want to let you go."

"Good," I wrapped an arm around her and she snuggled into me, "because I kinda don't want to let her go again either."

"What happened between you two anyway?" Glen asked, his gaze drifting towards Aiden, who was telling him to shut up

"It's okay Aid," I patted his shoulder from where he was sitting; on the passenger side. "I was scared and ran away."

"What were you scared of?" Lucas asked quietly.

"Not being enough for your mom. Maybe screwing it up or not being able to handle the distance between us when she went away for school." I said somewhat guiltily.

"But if the distance kept you away, didn't it hurt more to walk away for good?" The small blonde raised her eyebrows to her hairline and then frowned in confusion.

"It did." I admitted. "I thought I was doing the right thing."

We finally pulled up to the Carlin house and piled out of the truck. Glen wished me luck and winked, walking ahead quickly with Aiden.

"Do you really think she's going to be that mad?" I asked Lucas quietly.

"Ashley Avery!" Spencer yelled from the door and tapped her foot impatiently. "Where have you been?"

"Sorry, we went for a ride." I shrugged, approaching her. Lucas ran inside the house and I closed the door behind me, welcoming the warm air hitting my face.

"You went for a ride? You were gone for two hours! You said you were just going to pick up some ice cream and something at Aiden's place." Her clear cobalt eyes shined and I could tell she wasn't that upset.

Maybe deep down a part of her knew I was up to something good.

"How can I make it up to you?" I whispered, slowly unbuttoning my jacket and watched as her eyes drop towards my chest.

"Not fair, you're totally using those against me." Spencer murmured quietly, her fingers aching to touch the skin exposing my cleavage. I expected her to pout and growl, but I didn't expect to find myself hard against the wall beside the closet, with my lips infused to Spencer's.

We kissed passionately for a few minutes before she pulled back, her face flushed and chest heaving slightly. "You can't leave me alone again. I was getting antsy. Sam and Carmen have been making out wildly and I was starting to find it hot."

"Ew Spence, Sam's like a sister!" I laughed but she was serious.

"Listen Davies, I'm horny and since you didn't put out this morning, it's your fault that I was starting to find them hot." Spencer furrowed her eyebrow.

"My fault?" I hissed. "I did put out, thank you. Twice in fact!"

"Yea but then you mentioned having sex all day and now your naked body arching off the bed is stuck in my head on constant playback." Spencer brushed her lips across my cheek.

"I'm sorry. I won't mention 'all day' sex again." I stifled a giggle at her pouting lips. "Spence, baby, tomorrow I asked your parents if they'd look after the girls until dinner time. They agreed. We can start the New Year in bed."

"Really?" Spencer grinned. "All day?"

"All day." I whispered huskily, my fingertips traveling up her neck before tangling them in her long golden hair.

"Won't we get interrupted?" She asked.

"We'll be in the one bedroom suite at The Fairmont Royal York in the city." I licked my lips and eyed her up curiously.

"The Fairmont Royal York? Isn't that place kind of sort of expensive?" She raised an eyebrow.

"Not for you." I whispered again her lips. "Now do you forgive me for being gone two hours?" I teased just as she was about to deepen the kiss.

"Starting too." Spencer smiled and sighed, pulling away from me. "I guess we should stop making out in the hallway like two horny teenagers and see what our daughters are up too, eh?"

I crinkled my nose in a smile, agreeing.

--

**Spencer's PoV**

I wasn't impressed. What other excuse would Ashley come up with to sneak out of the house. A house full of guests and family. A house that was about to ring in the New Year and my girlfriend was nowhere to be found.

"Spence, where's Luc?" Paula came up to me, slightly concerned. "I'm making homemade eggnog and she's usually the first one to drink the first batch to herself."

"I saw her sneak out with Momma," Dylan nibbled on a cookie, her eyes drooping slightly.

"Dyl, did you want me to tuck you in?" I asked, running my fingers through her hair.

"No, I want to say 'Happy New Year' with everyone." She gave me a smile and I nodded.

"Sure, she tells me we're staying in the penthouse suite tomorrow and she takes off." I grumbled, slightly miffed that I hadn't seen Ashley for more than four hours on a day that everyone seemed to be reuniting.

"Penthouse suite?" Alex raised an eyebrow from the bar and I smirked. "She's always going overboard."

"Yeah well, that's Ashley for you." I sat down on the barstool and looked over at her solemn face. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing." Alex smiled and waved me off slightly. "I'm just thinking."

"You've been doing that a lot lately." I nudged her shoulder with my own. "Where's Tracey?"

"Playing air hockey with the guys in the basement." She smiled softly. "I figured Carmen would be down there too but no, she's sucking face with Samantha."

"I detect jealousy?" I raised an eyebrow and she shrugged. "Alex, leave Sam alone okay?"

"What?" She frowned at me, mixing her drinking slightly. "What is that supposed to mean?"

"It means give it a break for a bit. You're driving yourself crazy over something that shouldn't even be opened again. You have your fiancée back home for a couple of days, focus on her." I squeezed her arm. "I know a part you never let Sam go, but another part of you knows that it was for the best. In the mean time, the part of you that is downstairs whipping ass and taking names, should get your attention," I glanced at Sam and Carmen, whispering to each other with smiles, "not her."

Alex slid off her barstool and silently made her way down to the basement. I glanced at the clock. **11:37pm**.

"Ashley." I whimpered, wondering where she could be this late on New Years Eve, with an eleven year old nonetheless.

"Spence, Ashley's calling you." Glen handed me my cell phone.

"Ash? Where are you? Are you okay?" I felt the anger leave me and fill me with worry.

"_I'm fine baby, but I need you to come get us."_ Ashley sounded off – like she was nervous or something.

"What happened?" I panicked slightly. "Is Luc okay?"

"_We're both fine. We came here to get some fresh air, she wanted to talk. Now the car won't start."_ Her voice sounded calmer and that had me relax a bit too.

"Where are you?" I was already grabbing my winter coat and finding a set of spare keys. I happened to have found Alex's jeep keys and held them tightly in my grasp.

After Ashley told me where she was, I yelled that I'd be back and left quickly.

Dylan didn't even bother asking to tag along, which I found a little odd. Then again, it was nice to see her getting along with the other kids and a little more comfortable around adults she barely knew. However, she had no reason to fear her own family.

Pulling down the small road, I squinted at the scene before me.

"What in the world..." I stepped out of the vehicle and slowly made my way down the path that led me to The Pond.

More than twelve dozen ice candles were lit, surrounding the shorelines and the middle of the frozen water. I noticed a figure skating _flawlessly_ across the ice and another figure sitting at, what appeared to be a Baby Grand Piano. Soft music notes filled the air and I shook my head in shock and disbelief.

I approached the pond and stopped when Ashley's gorgeous brown eyes caught mine in the midst of the candles glow. She was wearing my old Rebels jersey that I gave her for graduation. "Car wouldn't start?" Was the only thing that came out of my mouth.

Lucas' soft laugh could be heard from beside me and I turned to look at her. She was playing the piano, _flawlessly. _"What the heck did you two scheme?"

"You like?" Ashley skated up to me, stopping just short of my winter shoes.

"Ash," I finally breathed her name like it was the first time I was saying it, "I love."

I didn't know what was going on, but when snow started to fall gently around us, I felt like my life was about to change.

"I just wanted to apologize for making you upset today with my disappearing acts," Ashley whispered softly, her eyes shining with such softness, they melted my heart, "please forgive me."

I could only nod, no longer able to find my voice.

"I had this dream once," she began to skate around me in slow circles, "I met this beautiful blonde in high school. She simply took my breath away and I knew from the moment I looked into her deep blue eyes that I was a goner. She taught me a lot about love and life."

I could hear a familiar string of notes come from the piano where Lucas continued to play.

"Then my dream turned into a nightmare. I ended up walking away from the greatest thing in my life without so much as a second thought." Ashley stopped in front of me again, her hands gently grabbing mine. "I'm not going to make that mistake again Spencer. I'm not going to be that girl who could break your heart so easily."

"Ash-" I started to say her name but she stopped with a soft brief kiss. She was slightly taller than me with the skates on, I found it adorable.

"I've never stopped loving you Spencer. I never fell out of love with you and there wasn't a day that went by without me thinking about you. I want you with me forever. I want us to be a family; you, me and our girls. I want so many things in the world but all I ever needed was you." Her brown eyes gazed lovingly at me, her words echoing my note I left her so many years ago with the jersey I left for her. "Spencer Dylan Carlin, you're it for me, you're the one. Will you marry me?"

I gasped, watching her drop down towards the ice and that was when I saw it; a perfect simple white-gold ring embedded with a single diamond sitting on the cold ice between us. Her thin fingers picked it up and she blinked slowly at me, her bottom lip tucked between her teeth.

"I took a chance at the location and the way I was going to ask you because I didn't want to stir up any bad feelings. I realize just how bad I hurt you that day and I can't take it back-"

"Yes." I whispered, my feet moving to step closer to her, our hips touching. "None of that matters Ash," I swallowed, my eyes glancing to her lips briefly before looking back into her eyes, "what matters is where we go from here. Yes."

"Yes?" She released air that she seemed to have been holding, a smile breaking out on her beautiful face. "Yes, you will marry me?"

"Yes, I will marry you." I nodded and her fingers shakily slipped the finger on my left ring finger before scooping me up in a hug. We both fell as she slipped with the skates on and laughed. "I love you."

"Oh God baby I love you too." Ashley breathed, her lips finding mine in a slow dance, moving along with the music that still filled the air.

"How did you pull this off?" I asked, resting my forehead against hers. "It must've taken you a long time."

"That's why I had my partner in crime tag along." Ashley glanced over to Lucas, who was staring at us with wide eyes and a huge smile. Ashley jerked her head for our daughter to join us in the middle of the ice.

Lucas skidded across the ice and landed beside us, her arms wrapping around my neck tightly. "Thank you," she whispered.

"For?" I pulled back and could see her smiling brightly.

"Keeping your promise, you said that Dylan was a keeper and now we can have her and Momma forever." Lucas looked between me and Ashley before kissing us both on the cheek and taking off back towards the piano.

"Look at you, all Romeo and shit." I nudged her and grabbed her hand, pulling her up steadily on her skates.

Ashley grinned shyly. "I was hoping it wouldn't scare you off, you know, considering..."

"It didn't, trust me. This is one of the most romantic things you've pulled off." I smirked and grabbed her by the collar of the jersey, crushing her body against mine. "And I plan on showing you thankful I am all day tomorrow." I whispered against her cool skin.

Ashley bit back a moan and nodded. "Speaking of which," she dipped her head again and kissed me, her fingers tangling in my hair, "Happy New Year baby."

I glanced at my watch and realized it just struck midnight.

She really was perfect.

_Happy New Years baby._

--

**Next time in Points Underneath:**

_"Nana, guess what?" I bent over and whispered in her ear._

_"Mmm." She mumbled, her eyes closed._

_"Our parents are getting married."_

_"What?!" Nana sat up, clutching at her head, swearing quietly. "No way, not again! I will not have them keep this a secret from us again."_


	95. A Suite Night

**_Slowly but surely, we are getting towards the end. I'm starting to tie up loose ends as we go, so with a few more intense chapters, a couple of fillers and the big ending... Points Underneath will be officially complete!! Who's excited?!_**

**71 - A Suite Night**

**Dylan's PoV**

The bed bounced and I frowned, upset that someone was interrupting the nice ice cream and hockey dream I was having. "Dylan..." I heard my name and jerked awake.

"Lukey?" I rubbed my eyes and sat up in bed, she was dressed in her pyjamas and crawled underneath the covers with me. "What time is it?"

"Almost seven in the morning." She whispered and propped herself up on her elbow. "Guess what?" Lucas grinned and I looked at her expectantly. "Mom and Momma are getting married!"

That woke me up.

"Shut up!" I squealed. "Momma asked her then?"

Lucas nodded. "The plan worked Dylly, we're going to be a real family!"

"Oh Lucas!" I jumped up on the bed and laughed because I was very happy. I knew what my sister and mommy were planning for mom, but to know that it went well was overwhelming and exciting all at the same time.

"What is going on in here?" Nana came into the bedroom, her hair messy and she was yawning like crazy. "You two are going to wake up the whole house."

"Do you have a hangover Nana?" Lucas teased.

Nana nodded and crawled onto the small bed, her head hitting my pillow. "Nana, guess what?" I bent over and whispered in her ear.

"Mmm." She mumbled, her eyes closed.

"Our parents are getting married."

"What?!" Nana sat up, clutching at her head, swearing quietly. "No way, not again! I will not have them keep this a secret from us again." She got up and left the room, shutting the door behind her.

"I don't think we were supposed to say anything," Lucas winced but smirked, "ah well, why hide such great news?"

--

**Ashley's PoV**

"What are you thinking?" Spencer whispered softly in my ear, her light breath washing over my cooling skin. I found myself pressed against a soft mattress and her body hovered over mine. Her bluish grey eyes twinkling non-stop since midnight.

"Mmm," I hummed softly, trailing my fingertips against her smooth back. I took silent pleasure in knowing that I could still cause those goosebumps to rise against her skin. "I'm thinking about how unbelievably happy I am right now."

Spencer smiled softly, her thumb stroking my cheek before her lips dropped down to mine in a slow kiss.

It was hard to believe that I was there, in Spencer's arms, and starting a life all over again. I could say that even if we never found each other again, I'd still find some sort of happiness with Dylan but I wouldn't be complete.

But I had it all at that moment. I had a job I absolutely loved, two extremely beautiful daughters and one gorgeous fiancée. I had a family outside who accepted me back in their lives and friendships that were getting more solid by the day.

I was one lucky son of a bitch.

I would work hard every day to keep things healthy and strong in every relationship I had worked hard to build – especially Spencer's.

I was going to marry this woman. I was going to watch her walk down that aisle with a dress fitted to her sexy body and make her so happy.

I was determined.

"You're thinking." Spencer giggled against my lips before pulling back. "Am I boring you?"

"No!" I gasped and clutched at her naked hips. "I was just thinking about you in a wedding dress..."

Spencer raised an eyebrow and cocked her head to the side. "Who says I'll be wearing the dress?"

I grinned. "Because I'm pretty sure you want that tie around my neck..."

"Oh God," Spencer groaned, her eyes drooping instantly. I didn't have to be told where her mind went – Winter Formal.

"Of course it was fun around yours the first time." I husked, my hands threading through her silky blonde hair.

"I think we need to relive that night," her smile twisted mischievously. "Only you can wear the tie and I'll wear the heels."

"You've got yourself a deal soon-to-be Mrs Davies." I wiggled my eyebrows and she grinned.

"Who said I was taking your name?" She added playfully.

"I can take your name." I offered seriously. "I don't care if you want to keep your own name, I just want to be married to you."

"Ash," she whispered with a smile, "I've dreamed of becoming 'Mrs. Ashley Davies' for years. Trust me when I say that I have no problem in taking your last name."

Her head dipped again and lips brushed against my own.

The alarm on the clock blared, making us both jump. "Please tell me it's not check-out time already! I've only been in this bed with you for a short time."

"Spencer, we haven't slept since the night before last and even then we barely slept." I laughed a little and traced my finger over her pout.

"But but… we have this huge ass suite and we can't even spend the night here." She sulked, wrapping the sheet around her naked chest.

"I'll get us another huge ass suite for our honeymoon, how about that?" I smiled and she grinned again. "We can go anywhere you wanna go."

"I'll have to think about it and get back to you." She winked and slipped out of bed, pulling on a robe. "I'm going to call mom and see how the girls are. Why don't you start a shower and I'll join you…"

Yeah, she didn't have to tell me twice.

--

**Spencer's PoV**

Paula picked up on the second ring and I greeted her cheerily. "Hey mom!"

"_Don't you 'hey mom' me."_ She hissed and I frowned. "_Were you going to tell us you're getting married?"_

"Oh Mom," I sighed with a smile, "of course we were going to tell you. It's something I want people to know, trust me."

"_Then why haven't I heard from?"_ Yeah, we inherited our drama skills from our mother, if you couldn't tell. _"Lucas and Dylan let it slip. I think your father and I have a right to know."_

"Well I was kind of busy having sex with Ashley." I replied seriously and chuckled when she gasped.

"_Spencer Dylan!" _

"What? You asked!" I laughed.

"_No I didn't!" _Paula sounded flustered.

"Hey mom, are the girls around?" I asked her before she walked into something that I couldn't help tease her more about.

"_Yes, Dylan's in the kitchen. I'll go grab her."_ I heard a rustling sound before Paula's voice was heard again. _"Congratulations baby, I knew you two were meant to be."_

"Thank you." I whispered, blushing slightly. "It took more than a couple of years but the years waiting were worth it."

"_Aw! I just love you two!"_ She squealed and called out Dylan's name.

I looked back towards the large bathroom doors and listened as Ashley started to sing in the shower. I smiled knowing that she was happy, _we_ were happy.

"_Hello?"_ Dylan's sweet voice echoed through the receiver of the phone.

"Hey cutie." I answered just as sweetly, causing her to giggle a bit. "How's my favourite young brunette?"

"_Good!"_ She replied cheerily. _"Are you having fun?"_

"Definitely." I let out a small laugh. "Are you and Luc behaving for Nana and Grandpa?"

"_Of course!"_

Of course. I wouldn't expect any less from my two girls.

"_Mom can Lukey and I go to Uncle Aiden's tonight? Anton wants to go snowboarding with Luc in the morning and Aunt Kyla said that I could have a girls breakfast with her and Cailyn."_ Dylan's voice almost sounded shy about asking.

"As long as it's okay with Aiden and Kyla." I answered softly. "I'll talk to one of them and if they say it's fine than I don't see a problem with it."

She cheered and a few minutes later I was on the phone with Aiden, claiming that they'd be more than willing to take the girls over night.

I thanked him ten times over because I knew that I'd get to spend the remainder of the night rocking Ashley's world in the overly expensive suite.

Life was definitely perfect.

--

**Next time in Points Underneath:**

_Alex walked me out to the car and leaned against the cold window. "I'll come home if you want me too."_

_"I want you to do whatever it is you want to do." I turned the key and started up the car. "Can you get a ride home?"_

_She glanced back over to Sammy's rental and nodded. I swallowed and shut the door after kissing her briefly. "Trace…"_

_"I'll see you in a bit." I smiled a little and started to roll the window up._


	96. Full House, Ace Is Low

**_A one time only Point of View. Necessary, I think. Enjoy... kinda. -frowns-_**

**_I don't own SoN. Just the ones that don't belong._**

**72 - Full House (Ace Is Low) **

**Tracey's PoV**

Her grey eyes had me falling all over my feet when we first met. She had a simple way about her that could just make me feel easy and calm. Alex Carlin was a sweet quiet girl who wanted to keep to herself. I think she was afraid of opening up and not knowing what to do once the world got to experience how beautiful and creative she really was.

Once her wings started to spread more and more, she started slipping a little as well. It was like she never really got to discover herself before she was embraced by swarming fans, a very supportive girlfriend and countless wannabes.

We became really close friends when she had a break from touring and came to visit me, wanting to escape her own reality. She attended all of my games and practices, cheering me on until one night, right after I finished changing; Alex grabbed me into a heated embrace and kissed me so hard in front of my team mates.

Of course having _the_ Alex Carlin kiss me was something people buzzed about for months on end. But she was mine and I was going to do everything in my willpower to keep it that way.

Alex didn't like to talk about Samantha Taylor. She often avoided any interview question regarding her and definitely nicked her out of any of our conversations. I figured she was a little heartbroken over the semi-public break up. I'd be too. Sam was her high school sweetheart and I was worried I couldn't compare.

Alex made me feel otherwise when we first started dating. She looked at me and I felt like I knew where I belonged in her life. She'd smiled and we were all that mattered.

At least that was what I thought.

I decided to surprise her one day, after telling her that I wouldn't be able to make it to one of her shows while she was in town. I wanted to be the one to grace a smile upon her features for once with a surprised gesture.

Turned out I was the one who was left mouth wide open and a whirlwind of emotions swirling through me. Seeing my girlfriend naked with her naked ex-girlfriend on top of her; it was really hard to digest.

I never thought I'd be able to forgive her. I never thought I'd find myself in her arms and in her bed a few days later confessing that as long as it didn't happen again, we'd work through it.

"So how long are you in town for?" Spencer smiled, breaking me out of my thoughts. She sat down beside me, handing me a glass of wine.

"I'm heading back tomorrow." I smiled thankfully and licked my lips, taking a sip of the smooth red wine.

"That's a shame," she laughed softly, "I'm sure Alex wishes it were longer."

I chanced a glance at the beautiful raven haired Carlin and bit my lip a little. I shrugged slightly, watching the way her eyes lit up every time Sam would smile at her.

Spencer caught on and cleared her throat. "They've always had a hard history."

"Yeah." I muttered silently and continued to watch on as Carmen dragged Sammy away to dance with Lucas and Dylan in the middle of the living room. Alex's eyes never left her ex girlfriend's but finally they caught me watching her. She gave me a small wave and shy smile before her long legs brought her towards me.

"That's my cue to find my sexy fiancée." Spencer squeezed my leg and I grabbed her wrist softly.

"Congrats Spence." I said simply with a genuine smile and she smiled back before taking off towards the kitchen.

"I remember you being a lot more 'party girl' at these New Years Day Carlin functions." Alex smiled as she took Spencer's previous spot.

"Yeah sorry, I'm just feeling a little drained." I gave her a small apologetic smile, lacing my fingers together in my lap. "Don't let me drain your fun though Alex."

"You're not." She frowned slightly, her eyes raking over every inch of my face. "What's wrong?"

"I'm just tired." I said simply and inhaled deeply. I looked back over to where Sam and Carmen were dancing together in their own world.

"Want me to take you home? We can just relax before you have to leave in the morning. I know you don't like travelling after staying up late." Alex was a sweetheart regardless of how she was feeling. I often wondered if she even knew how she felt about everything.

"You can stay here." I stood up and place my glass on the coffee table. "I know how much you like to stay up late with your family, especially since there have been two new editions." I pointed to Dylan and Ashley shoving Spencer towards the makeshift dance floor.

"But you're my family too." She whispered a little too softly.

"Alex, like I said, don't let me ruin your fun okay?" I cupped her cheek and kissed her forehead. "I'll see you when you get home."

"Trace," she pleaded and grabbed my hand, "something's wrong. What aren't you telling me?"

"Right here and right now really isn't the time." I whispered in a hushed tone before rubbing my forehead, trying to ignore the confused and pained look cross Alex's face. "We'll talk when you get home." I grabbed my glass and brought it into the kitchen before telling everyone goodnight and hoped I'd see them again soon.

Alex walked me out to the car and leaned against the cold window. "I'll come home if you want me too."

"I want you to do whatever it is you want to do." I turned the key and started up the car. "Can you get a ride home?"

She glanced back over to Sammy's rental and nodded. I swallowed and shut the door after kissing her briefly. "Trace…"

"I'll see you in a bit." I smiled a little and started to roll the window up.

--

It wasn't even a couple of hours after I arrived home that I heard a vehicle pull up in the driveway. I heard Alex's voice and then unmistakably Sammy's. A few minutes later the front door opened and there she stood.

"Wasn't expecting you home so soon." I sat up from my lying position on the couch and turned the TV volume on mute.

"Did I disappoint you?" Alex whispered, taking off her coat. "I mean all night you've been practically avoiding me. You go back to New York tomorrow and I just figured you'd be more eager to spend time with me."

I couldn't help but laugh a little, standing up. "Are you serious?" I shook my head and sighed, not wanting to get into anything heavy but if not then, when? "Are you listening to yourself _Alexis_? I came back home to spend time with you. I wanted to be with _you_. But while I was seeing you, you were seeing _her._" I swallowed and wiped my hands on my jeans, pacing on the living room carpet. I didn't want those words to ooze jealousy but I could only take so much.

"Are- are you jealous?" Alex's soft voice wafted through the silence a few minutes later. "We're just friends."

"Get off it, you were never just friends." I shot her a look and ran my hands through my hair. The room was starting to get a little warmer. My heart was pounding faster and I knew that what I had to do was going to either break us or make us. "I get that she's important to you, I really do. I got that a long time ago but I just thought maybe, just maybe we could actually make things work between us. I allowed myself to believe that you were happy."

"I am!" Alex raised her voice slightly.

"But do I make you happy?" I whispered and didn't dare to look at her. Nothing was said for a couple of seconds before I finally allowed myself to lean against the back of the couch. "I- I should've seen this coming that day on your tour bus."

"We're going back there?" She sighed, biting her lip a little.

"No, but I know that's where we're heading again. And this isn't just about her, Alex. This is about us. Somewhere down the road, we split in two and neither one of us was willing to admit it." I blinked and stared blankly at the muted TV.

"Tracey, what?" Alex stepped closer, her soft fingers finding my arm gently.

I tried to blink back the tears and swallow the lump in my throat. I flinched a little when her hands cupped my face and her watery grey eyes were staring back at me. She knew.

"Why?" The question left her lips broken and scattered.

"You're not in this for the same reasons I was." I whispered, dropping my gaze. The truth was a lot heavier now that it was out in the open.

"I-" Alex dropped her hands to her sides and stepped back, tears visible. "I've been so selfish with my own needs, I know. I tried Tracey, I tried so hard to be who you wanted me to be."

"I wanted that Alex I met in the hockey arena twelve years ago. I wanted that Alex who hung out with me during her down time from her music career. I wanted the Alex who seemed so happy with her life." I spoke softly. "You lost yourself so much along the way and I don't know what to do to bring you back – even if you did, we're so far apart as it is."

"We're really doing this?"

A sobbed escaped my throat because it was killing me inside. It didn't exactly surprise me that she wasn't putting up more of a fight, but that just showed me that she was somewhat on the same page.

"I don't mean to be in love with her." Alex visibly swallowed and tore her eyes away from me with guilt. It hurt a lot more than I thought it would to hear her say that out loud. "I would've never cheated though, I swear."

"Not physically." I whispered and stepped further away from her. "I can't do this anymore. I won't do this anymore. I'm not going to come back Alex and after tonight, we're going our separate ways. It just hurts so much to be around you; you hurt me so much."

"Oh God I'm so sorry." She slid onto the couch and let her head fall into her hands. "I was so blinded by my own problems; I never even considered what you were going through."

"You never do." I finally sat down next to her. "That was okay with me though because I knew your music helped you out a lot. I tried to pass everything off on how stressful your career could be but I knew deep down-"

"-I just wanted to be happy. I wanted to give you that happy life but instead I just strung you along into a relationship that-"

"-was broken for years." I finished and licked my lips, drying my eyes. "While I was in New York, I met someone. She was really interested in everything I had to say. I think that was when I realized that something very big and crucial was missing with us."

"Are you trying to make me jealous?" Alex frowned, her fists closed tightly.

"No." I snapped slightly, "but it'd be nice if you actually showed some concern. It wasn't even like that with her, okay? She was someone who listened to me and wanted to spend at least a day with me."

"You never mentioned her." Alex glanced at me.

"You never asked." I shrugged. "I love you Alex Carlin and I will always love you. For me, it was real and yes, it would've been great if things were different and we had a Spashley ever after, but you're not my Spencer to my Ashley."

"I don't want to lose you." Alex finally broke down and she looked so pretty in her pain. I sighed and pulled her towards me, her fists clutching at my shirt.

"I wanted to hate you for putting me through this and I wanted to hate you for putting yourself through this. I can't though and that drives me insane – however, I have to walk away Alex. I have to say goodbye and never look back. My heart is already shattered as it is."

"What can I do make it better?" Alex looked up at me. "Please Trace..."

A face that was so beautiful should never be that broken. It was her doing though and I had to keep reminding myself of that fact. Smooth, wet cheeks were stroked softly underneath my thumbs and I felt overwhelmed. "I could've loved you forever, you know?" I whispered sadly against her hot skin. "I could've shown you the world." Lips pressed against the corners of her mouth. "And I think," I pulled back, her teary grey eyes searching my brown ones, "just for tonight, just one night – we should make it all count."

I was only human and I had weaknesses as well. I made mistakes and at that particular moment, it would be my favourite.

No other goodbye had been so bittersweet.

--


	97. Scribbled Note

_Let's see if I can start cleaning up this mess... Enjoy!_

**73 - Scribbled Note**

**Alex's PoV**

The pounding in my head wasn't the first thing I noticed when I woke up. No, the left side of the bed being empty was. The bedside clock's bold green letters blinked hauntingly back at me; **6:09am.**

Tracey wasn't in bed with me and the whole house sounded eerily quiet. I sat up and my heart pounded hard in my chest when I noticed the closet door wide open and Tracey's clothes gone completely. The dresser drawers were slightly open; making it known that nothing of hers was left there either.

I ran quickly to the bathroom only to find all of stuff gone as well. Pulling on an oversized t-shirt, I made my way downstairs.

Everything that didn't seem so real the night before, became a crashing reality right in front of my eyes. On the counter by the coffee pot was a silver diamond engagement ring, two sets of keys; one for the house and one for the jeep, and a short scribbled note.

_**Wish it didn't have to end this way. Find yourself and be happy. **_

_**- Trace**_

Did I deserve to cry? I had everything, didn't I? A nice house, a loving fiancée, friends and family. My sister was talking to me again and I gained my surrogate niece back.

I messed it all up in the first place. It wasn't just about the lying to Spencer and Ashley; that was just the tip of it all.

I was so lost in myself. I didn't even think before I acted or spoke. I didn't care how I would go about things just as long as it didn't affect me. I didn't stop to realize that in the process of protecting myself, I was hurting those who meant the world to me.

Tracey and Sammy were a big part of that. Ashley was a part of that and Spencer got it the worst because we were blood.

Family.

I watched how things were so torn up between Ashley and Aiden when Spencer was first involved. I swore I'd never let that happen and yet, I did and I was barely aware of it. If I was, I just didn't care enough to notice.

Tracey was perfect. She wasn't afraid to tell me where to go if I was pissing her off. She wasn't afraid to hurt my feelings and that was why it broke my heart even more when she was so heartbroken the night before.

She could've been meaner and proved a harsher point. She could've just left and never came back and be completely validated. Yet, she let it all out gently and cried and then took me to bed as if _I _were the one heartbroken.

I threw the spare keys across the room and fell down to my knees, crying. So maybe I didn't deserve to cry – but the tears weren't for me.

Tracey was the best part of my recent life and I screwed it up. I let her get away and I knew there was nothing I could do about it.

I had to let her go because in the end, Tracey was a really beautiful woman who deserved more than playing a key to the happiness in my life. Just because I couldn't have who I wanted, it didn't mean that she had to take second place.

She needed more. She wanted more and I wanted her to have it.

I knew it'd hit me a lot harder once the day wore on. I was still in shock, I barely remembered showering and driving over to my parents' place. It wasn't even seven in the morning yet and I heard hushed voices coming from the kitchen.

"Hey Alex," Spencer greeted me quietly with a smile, her hand laced with Ashley's as they sat at the kitchen table.

"Hey." I gave a small smile back and grabbed myself a cup of coffee before joining them.

"You missed the best part of last night," Ashley grinned, "Spencer sang karaoke."

"I was bribed." Spencer rolled her eyes. "Lucas promised to do dishes for the next month."

"You have a dishwasher." I replied, slightly amused.

"Now I have a human one and I'll save on my electricity bill. Plus Lucas will be doing her part in conserving." Spencer looked smug.

"You do realize that once she unleashes those Carlin puppy eyes, you'll let her off the hook right?" Ashley smirked.

I sat back and watched as they exchanged soft glances and light touches while talking. It was like second nature to them, I bet they didn't even realize they did it.

I knew I wanted that.

"So where's your beautiful lady?" Ashley glanced over at me after taking a sip of her coffee.

I felt my heart speed up and then I was a little light headed. "Uh, she left already," my voice cracked.

Spencer tilted her head and frowned. "I thought we were throwing a big brunch since we're heading back tomorrow?"

"Well she had to go." I cleared my throat, willing any unwanted tears away.

"I'm sorry. I would've liked to say bye again." Ashley sighed a little with a pout.

"She's not coming back." I whispered, some part of me hoping that they never caught that.

"What?" I heard them both ask tentatively. I didn't dare look up and I knew I should've. I should feel ashamed.

"Trace is gone." I bit the inside of my cheek. "She broke things off last night and she left her keys and ring on the counter when she left this morning."

I didn't think they needed to know the tidbit of our break-up sex.

"Oh my God Alex," Spencer whispered, her hand briefly touching mine, "I'm so sorry."

I tugged at my ear nervously. "Don't be. Anyone probably saw it coming." I glanced up at them to see their eyes confirming it for me. "Anyone but me."

"Maybe things will work themselves out." Ashley spoke softly. "Things are known to happen," she smiled a little towards Spencer.

"Well as Tracey so epically pointed out to me last night, we'll never have our Spashley ever after." I got up from the table and put my empty cup in the sink. "I'm going to see if anyone else is up."

"Well hey," Spencer got up and grabbed my arm, "for what it's worth Alex, I do see some improvements with you. I know it can't be easy losing someone you spent the better part of your life with, but you'll find yourself again and then live to make someone else happy."

"Thanks." I offered back quietly.

"Spencer and Carmen are rallying up some hockey players tonight. We're heading to the rink down at the park for a game, why don't you join us and the girls on the side lines?" Ashley smiled and raised an eyebrow. "Just like old times."

I thought about it for a second and didn't want to be seen moping around on my own. I also didn't want to brush off the break up so coolly either – I was going to miss Tracey so much. Despite what anyone thought.

"Okay." I nodded. "Sounds like fun."

--

**Spencer's PoV**

"So tell me the details!" Kyla shrieked, grabbing my left hand for the bazillionth time, ogling over my new engagement ring. It wasn't shining as bright as it could be but we were in the old arcade before heading to the rink.

"Well," I smirked and watched Ashley walk by the arcade games with a tray of fresh pizza and heading towards us, "there were a million candles all over the pond."

"Aww!" Kyla sighed happily.

"I wouldn't say a million," Ashley sat down, catching the last part of our conversation, "a lot of dozens maybe."

"Must've been a bitch to clean up." Kyla laughed, finally letting go of my hand.

"Which is why I paid the boys off." Ashley threw her a wink. "Aiden couldn't say no but Glen was a little whinier in that department. I had to throw in my car keys for when he visits, saying he gets to have my mustang for a day."

"And you agreed?" I raised an eyebrow at her. "Are you insane?"

"What?" Ashley gave me a cute shrug, "he's cool Spence. I like the guy. It's like I have two older brothers now. Glen's a push over just like you."

"I'm not a push over!" I protested. "I mean if you wanna get down and dirty, sure, by all means push away."

Kyla snickered and picked up a slice of pizza. "You can be sometimes Spence; not all the time, but sometimes - especially with your daughters."

"Mom," Dylan approached me shyly, her brown eyes shimmering with life, "would it be okay if Lucas and I go play air hockey after we eat?"

I felt Ashley squeeze my knee under the table and we exchanged smiles. "Only if you promise to kick her butt," I winked back at Dylan and she grinned, nodding.

"You're encouraging sibling rivalry." Ashley noted playfully.

"Oh please, we haven't even begun unravelling that part yet." I rolled my eyes.

"Alex and Spencer were just like those two at that age." Kyla told Ashley.

"And then what happened?" My brunette raised an eyebrow.

"Spencer sprouted boobs." Kyla chuckled and sipped her Pepsi. "She started getting noticed and well, bye bye Alex."

Ashley nodded her head slowly before turning her head towards our daughters. They were sharing a booth with Anton, Hannah and Cailyn. "How old were you when all of that happened?"

I watched her shift nervously and it made me smile. "Baby, Lucas and Dylan are different. They're not going to be at each other's throats, trust me. Besides, the thing that separated Alex and I was that we shared nothing in common to bond over."

"She had me." Kyla nodded. "Only I think when we bonded over certain cute boys, she was really imagining one of their sisters or something."

"Hey!" I laughed with her and Ashley.

"How is Alex, anyway?" Kyla asked after the laughter died down.

"I don't know." I shrugged a little. "She went home before anyone could ask her any questions. I don't think Sammy knows."

"Tracey did the right thing." My best friend said softly. "Why put yourself through all of that when you know you're not the one they think about?"

"I have to agree." Ashley nodded. "It took a lot of guts."

"And it took a lot of guts for Alex to let her walk away. If she wanted things so simple in her life she could've begged her to stay, don't you think?" I asked quietly. "Instead, I think she knew it'd be wrong and allowed it all to happen."

"It shouldn't have happened to begin with." Alex came up behind our table. She smiled at our shocked faces. "It's okay, I know it's bound to be talked about."

My sister did look a little worn out and upset but her attire and façade was trying to say otherwise. "Did you want some pizza?"

"I ate already." She smiled warmly but joined us anyway. "Did I miss anything good?"

"Um, not really." Ashley shrugged. "Kyla told me about how when Spencer sprouted boobs, you were kicked to the curb."

"Oh yes." Alex nodded and squinted her eyes at me. "Heaven forbid little sis ruin the twelve year olds plans to buy training bras."

"Whatever." I snorted.

It kinda felt good to laugh again but the moment was bittersweet. Alex had to be feeling some sort of pain but I'd let her come to me and talk if wanted too. I wasn't about to pry.

"Hey losers," Carmen swayed up to the both with Sammy at her side, "ready to watch me take Spencer's lead as rink queen?"

Everyone at the table rolled their eyes and laughed. "You can try uber butch, but you'll never win. My bummed knee is not going to stop me."

"Your ego can't even stop you." Carmen muttered and I smirked at her sulking.

"Finally got the message." I teased.

"You suck Carlin." She stuck her tongue and hopped over to the kids both and slid in.

Ashley leaned in and I felt her breath on my ear, "you do suck Carlin," she whispered, "but by the sounds I make when you do, I'm sure you're aware I don't mind."

_Holy fuck. _Screw the game.

I wanted that suite back.

A bedroom.

A bed.

A carpeted floor.

A shower stall!

"Down girl." She smirked because she knew she had me squirming in my seat.

--

**Next time in Points Underneath:**

_"What's wrong?"_

_"You think if there was something wrong, I'd tell you?" I asked, maybe a little too harshly. _

_Carmen held up her hands with a frown and backed up. "Sorry for caring." She was about to turn around and I sighed, pinching the bridge of my nose._

_"Carm," I said her name softer that time, "I'm sorry. I've just had a bad couple of days."_


	98. Homeward Bound

**_Okay, so this is all I have as far as 'new' material. No one has read the next upcoming chapters (except my wife), and everyone will be on fair ground as far as reading goes. Also, I'm still in the process of finishing this so if my updates start to dwindle, it's only because I'm working on new chapters!_**

**_Enjoy!_**

**74 - Homeward Bound**

**Alex's PoV**

Screams of laughter could be heard on the ice. Aiden was teaching Cailyn how to skate on the smaller rink where Lucas and Dylan helped.

Carmen was busy trying to prove she was better than Spencer, but failed she lost her balance by just standing there.

Ashley sat quietly beside me and I knew she wanted to let me know she was there if I needed to talk. It'd be a long time since we sat down and talked.

Sammy was next to her, watching the friendly game about to unfold between old high school friends.

"If you ever need to talk," Ashley finally whispered, her gloved hand grabbing mine, "you always have me."

"Thank you." I looked at her with a small smile.

"Hey," Sammy frowned, "are you okay?" Her blue eyes scanned my face worriedly.

"Yeah." I nodded, feeling Ashley's hand slip from mine. I hadn't told Sammy about the break-up yet, I didn't want to just bring it up out of nowhere. "I think I'm just cold."

"You think?" Ashley broke the ice, adjusting her ass on the bench. "I'm wearing three layers of pants not including the pair of snow pants and my legs are freezing."

"Oh," Sammy hopped up and clapped her hands, "we have some hot chocolate in the car and we brought blankets. I'll be right back." She patted my head on her way towards the path the led to the parking lot.

"Momma!" Lucas came charging up with her skates on. "Are they going to start the game soon?"

"They are." Ashley smiled at the smaller blonde and watched as her and Dylan curled into each other and under their blanket, getting ready to scream no doubt.

"Here," Sammy came back with a thermos of hot chocolate and a blanket, draping it over our legs. She decided to sit beside me instead of Ashley and it made it hard for me to even concentrate.

"So where are you going after this?" I asked quietly.

"Well Carmen is going back to Minnesota for a bit. She's going to be training and I thought I'd check it out." Sam smiled a little. "I figured I'd fly from there to Australia and then get back work."

I could only nod. I didn't know what to say after that.

"What about you, Alexis?" She breathed softly. "Planning on heading to New York to see your girl?"

I was about to open my mouth when it was announced the players were taking a break. Carmen was up to the benches in no time, her cold mouth against Sam's.

"I'm going to use the little girls room." I excused myself and Ashley gave me a soft look.

There was heating in the washrooms and I made myself comfortable on the clean sink, swinging my feet back and forth. I wasn't sure if I wanted to go home or go back to my parents.

Home would probably be the best option.

"It is rather warmer in here, isn't it?" I heard a voice say in the doorway. Carmen's grey eyes were smiling and her lips were grinning. "I'd stay in here myself but that damn sister of yours is kicking my ass on that ice. It's a shame she's no longer allowed to play hockey."

"Yeah." I agreed wholeheartedly.

"So what are you doing hanging out in here?" She asked, placing her hockey stick against the wall. "Aside from it being a lot warmer."

"I don't know." I shrugged.

"Liar." Carmen called my bluff and took off her beanie hat. "What's wrong?"

"You think if there was something wrong, I'd tell you?" I asked, maybe a little too harshly.

Carmen held up her hands with a frown and backed up. "Sorry for caring." She was about to turn around and I sighed, pinching the bridge of my nose.

"Carm," I said her name softer that time, "I'm sorry. I've just had a bad couple of days."

"I noticed." She turned around to face me again, hopping up on the counter. "Ace left earlier than usual."

"Yea, she left alright." I shrugged. "It's not like you didn't see it coming."

"Of course I did." Carmen frowned. "Didn't you?"

"No." I laughed bitterly. "Apparently I was the only one that didn't."

"No surprise there." She bumped my shoulder and we went quiet for a bit. "_Does_ it surprise you?"

"What? Her leaving me?"

"Well yeah." Carmen nodded.

"Not really," I admitted, "I just didn't think it'd be… like that."

Carmen sat there before she paced around the small heated washroom. "I know you don't like me," she started slowly, like she was choosing her words carefully, "but I like you."

"I never said I didn't like you." I frowned slightly. "You're just someone easy to take it out on at the moment."

"It's hard to let go of someone you're in love with, isn't it?" Carmen smiled a little. "The best part about loving someone that much is letting them be happy."

"Do you make her happy?" I asked.

"I'd like the think so. Sam and I aren't ready to get married or anything like that Alex, but she's very much a big part of my life. I want her around me for a long time." She shrugged. "And I know you want her as well."

"I don't." I said quickly. "I mean, I'm not… I wouldn't do that."

"I've never gotten over your sister and I never even had her to begin with," Carmen glanced at me, "so I can't imagine what you and Sam are going through. I always knew that Spencer belonged with Ashley and that they made each other happy. I wasn't about to ruin that with my own feelings."

"I wasn't going to do that." I said a little upset. "Yes, I've admitted that Sammy's someone I'll never get over, but I wouldn't do that to her."

"Which is why I like you," she countered back to her earlier statement. "Remember when we first met? Ashley wanted to beat the crap out of me and Spencer wanted nothing to do with me. You were the one that convinced them I wasn't bad, Alex. You helped them see that even though I was a loser crushing on someone I couldn't have, I was harmless. You were my first true friend in this circle."

"You introduced me to Isa." I scowled. "I lost Sam."

"Because you let yourself lose her. Isa didn't force you to break up with Sammy back then and she didn't force you into bed either." Carmen snickered. "My point in all of this is that you've been through it all. The confusion, the love, the love triangle, the engagement and somewhere in there, you lost yourself."

"I know."

"I don't do this girly shit okay? So don't go telling anyone. But you've got to move on a little bit, don't you think? I mean, there's a whole world out there that knows your name. You should return to your music and live the single life for a while." Carmen sighed a little. "I think you've ran yourself ragged with wanting to be the center of attention by those close to you when you really need to give it to people who don't know you."

"Did you think I was going to take Sammy from you?" I asked after a bit of silence.

"No." Carmen smirked a little. "If Sammy wants you, then that's her choice. If somewhere down the road, you two meet up and are meant to be, then I have no control over that. I love her, she knows it and that's where we stand at the moment."

"Carmen!" Spencer's voice came closer to the washroom before her head poked in the door. "We're on again!"

Carmen smiled at me and tucked a strand of hair behind my ear. "Stop feeling sorry for yourself okay? It doesn't suit you and it never has. This isn't high school anymore. You didn't just break up with a girlfriend, Alex. Tracey dropped you after years of being together. Be upset about it, cry about it but don't go moping around like there was nothing you could've done. You won't get anywhere if you're constantly thinking about righting your wrongs. Start fresh kid." She punched my shoulder and followed Spencer out the door.

I wasn't sure if her speech was supposed to make me feel better or worse.

She was right though; I needed to go my own way for awhile. I needed to be alone and maybe, hopefully, I'd be able to find myself again.

--

**Ashley's PoV**

Aunt Greta had me in a death grip, her face buried in my neck. "You promise me you'll call?"

"I promise." I nodded, wiping her teary eyes once she pulled back a bit. "Don't cry, you'll get me going again."

"I'm sorry. It's just we've missed you so much Ashley." She whispered. "We never thought we'd see you again."

"Oh don't be crazy," I batted her hand away with a laugh, "I'll always come home to my family."

"Treat her good," Aunt Greta finally landed on Spencer, who was holding back her own tears.

"Oh I will." Spencer stepped forward to hug my Aunt as well. "It was nice seeing you again Greta."

"So you're sure it's okay if the girls come visit us in the summer?"

Spencer glanced at me and I nodded. "Of course. Dylan loves you guys, she's thrilled that you showed her pictures of mom and dad." I swallowed the lump in my throat. I couldn't look at the pictures yet myself but I knew where they were when I could find the strength too.

Spencer's hand was rubbing my back slowly. "We'll call you as soon as we get home."

"Okay." Aunt Greta nodded. "Uncle Vic feels bad for not being here."

"I know how work is." I smiled. "I understand. Tell Aiden I expect his family to come visit us this summer as well. You guys should come too."

"Plan on it." Aunt Greta pulled me into another hug and when the final announcement for our flight boarding came on, we pulled back.

"Mom, Momma!" Lucas and Dylan came running up to use with their small carry on bags. "They're going to leave without us!"

With one last hug from all of us, we were all behind the gate waving at Aunt Greta sadly.

"Homeward bound!" Lucas cheered with Dylan as they took their seats on the plane.

Spencer grabbed my hand after we buckled up and I couldn't help but pull her into a slow kiss. "What was that for?" She whispered with a cute blushing smile.

"Thank you for taking us with you. I was so scared to visit my family, not knowing what they thought of me." I smiled bravely. "You make everything more than okay in my world, Spence."

"I live to make you and our family happy." Spencer responded in a soft voice. "I want you by my side always so you don't need to thank me. You're amazing Ash."

"You are." I kissed her again. "And I can't wait to marry you."

Spencer gave me a sexy grin. "And I can't wait to be your bride."

I pulled back. "So you're wearing a dress?"

"For you, I'd wear anything." Spencer kissed me and then we settled back in our seats content. "Besides," she said a few seconds later, "it's not me you have to convince about wearing a dress."

I raised an eyebrow and found Lucas staring at me from across the aisle. Her eyes narrowed slightly and she was shaking her head, 'no'.

"Hmm," I frowned in thought, "we'll work it out."

One way or another.

--

**Next time in Points Underneath:**

_"Why didn't I know this?" I asked a little hurt. Sure, maybe I didn't have the right to know but Alex could usually tell me everything. Her mouth liked to open every time she heard news that was 'gossip' worthy._

_"Sam," her voice was now shaky and she held her breath, "please don't ask me that."_

_I was slightly confused. "Ask you why everyone knew and I'm the last one to know? I've been wondering why people were walking on egg shells this past week and why you've been so distant with me. Alexis, I thought you knew you could talk to me. About anything."_


	99. I Don't Understand

****New chapter!** **New chapter!** **New chapter!** **New chapter!** **New chapter!****

_Hmmm... feel the love. That's all you need to do. _

**75 - I Don't Understand**

**Sammy's PoV**

"Spencer said I could stay with her for a few days," Alex smiled softly at me as we sat in Johnny's for our first breakfast alone in over a week.

Spencer, Ashley and the girls had taken off a few days prior and it seemed my favourite Carlin was missing in action afterwards. Carmen told me she had a rough couple of days but didn't venture further into the issue and I never pressed.

I was a little curious as to why Carmen knew such a thing but I didn't ask. I could only assume Alex said something to Spencer and therefore it was relayed to the dark brunette.

Still, the atmosphere was off since New Years. Aside from the constant love struck googly eyes Spencer and Ashley made for each other since their engagement, everything seemed off.

"Then you're heading..." It was like trying to pull teeth from a horse to get Alex to open up to me. It was odd really.

"Vancouver," she sighed, "hit the studio. They want me in New York after the first half of my tour to lay down some tracks for a bonus CD. The record label has a contract with another label in New York City, working on a charity promo. I'm looking forward to that."

"That's cool." I offered sincerely. "Too bad it wasn't now; you could've travelled back with Ace."

Silence swept between us and it was uncomfortable and awkward. I watched Alex's face fall slightly and her fingers twitch. Her eyebrows furrowed together while her husky grey eyes fell towards the pancakes on her plate.

"Alexis?" I breathed softly and instinctively grabbed her hand from across the table. "I'm sorry, did I say something wrong?"

Sadness was evident in her features but she finally looked up at her, blinking slowly while exhaling air softly. "No, you didn't." A half smile appeared on her face but it wasn't that sincere.

"Did you two have another argument?" I asked, suddenly feeling bad. After Tracey found out I had a key to their house, Alex was a little more distant with me.

Again, I wasn't going to push. I had Carmen to think of as well, she was my girlfriend. She wanted my attention, she craved it and she wasn't afraid to show it. It would do me no good in rejecting her the time while I had it.

I was alone with Alex because Carmen insisted on it and headed back to Kenora to take the girls to the Leafs game.

"I guess you could say that." Alex blinked a little and sighed, her fork making holy patterns in her breakfast.

"Did you want to talk about it?" I asked gently, placing down my own fork in favour of giving her my undivided attention. It wasn't a hard thing to do with Alex.

She seemed to have paused a brief moment before tucking strands of black hair behind her ears. Grey eyes focused outside the window, watching the light snowflakes fall to the ground. "Tracey is back in New York," Alex whispered shakily, "and I doubt she's coming back."

I frowned and tilted my head slightly. "What do you mean?" Deep down I knew instantly what she meant but for some reason the question was asked anyway.

My heart broke for her when we stared at each other silently.

"Alex Carlin is single again. It's for the best," she smiled painfully before sitting up straighter.

"Oh God Alexis," I breathed brokenly, grabbing her hands and squeezing them.

I didn't know what to say next and I didn't know how to feel.

I've said time and time again that we were over, that there was no chance for us in the future but a part of me never wanted to believe that was true. A part of me still held on tightly.

"Did you see it coming?" Alex asked me quietly. She studied my face just as hard as I studied hers.

I knew they were going through a rough patch but I never did see that one coming. I thought Alex and Tracey would make it work.

"No." I replied honestly.

"Really?" She looked a little shocked and the tone of her voice led me to believe that she was unsure of my answer. "Everyone else could. Spencer, Ashley, Carmen!" Her hands flew up in the air slightly. "Everyone except me... and you, I guess."

"I swear I never..." I swallowed and licked my lips before grasping onto what she just said. "Everyone knew? How come, I mean... when did you guys break up?"

"The night before she left," Alex sighed heavily, her eyes closing briefly.

"Why didn't I know this?" I asked a little hurt. Sure, maybe I didn't have the right to know but Alex could usually tell me everything. Her mouth liked to open every time she heard news that was 'gossip' worthy.

"Sam," her voice was now shaky and she held her breath, "please don't ask me that."

I was slightly confused. "Ask you why everyone knew and I'm the last one to know? I've been wondering why people were walking on egg shells this past week and why you've been so distant with me. Alexis, I thought you knew you could talk to me. About anything."

"I wanted too, okay?" Her head shot up and she stared up me, unshed tears evident in her eyes. "But I didn't know how too. I didn't know how to face you after everything that was said with Tracey."

"What?" I shook my head, both of us pushing our plates away. "I don't understand."

"No, you wouldn't." Alex whispered. "You don't understand how every time you look at me; my heart beats that much faster. How whenever I do dream, it's only because you're with me. I tried so hard to forget about you Samantha, I did. I fought it but the harder I fought, the easier it was to fall back in."

I held my breath, air rushing through my ears rapidly while my heart beat fast. A confession that was so raw and urgent was held high and heavy on us, I didn't know how to respond.

"I meant it when I said I didn't want you to go anywhere, that I loved your company. I tried to believe it was because we were best friends and it felt good to have you around again. It wasn't though," she sniffled, unable to hold back the tears, "it was because my heart wanted you to want me back."

"Alexis," I choked out and went shook my head, "I-"

"Tracey broke up with me because she wanted me to be happy. She knew how I felt before I even fully realized it. God, it must've been so hard for her to watch me watch you."

A deafening silence lingered over us and I thought of Carmen. She knew all of this and she didn't tell me. She still treated me with romantic flowers and soft slow kisses, but she knew how Alex and I worked.

Carmen was seen in a whole new light. Someone I wanted to be with because she made me happy.

"I'm not asking you to return the feelings," Alex finally said sadly, "I know you're happy right now. I know that smile you make when your heart skips a beat and Carmen does that. But I can't fight this feeling anymore Sam, I can't pretend I don't feel anything when you're all I ever feel."

"You know I love you," I whispered back, biting my lip. "You know that I'll always be here for you."

"Don't be." Alex finally wiped her face and laughed a little. "Please, just..." she frowned slightly before standing up. "...promise me something?"

I wanted to stand up too. I wanted to take her in my arms and tell her everything would be okay. It was how we worked, it was us and perfect.

But something stopped me from doing so. The look in her eyes, the body language she was giving me, it was all so distant still. I could only nod at her question.

"Live." She breathed and placed her sunglasses on her face, the tint so dark I couldn't even tell if she was looking at me anymore. "See you around Samantha Taylor."

I tried to open my mouth to say something, anything, to stop her. I couldn't even budge.

I sat there alone and frowned, not understanding what just happened.

Not understanding why my heart felt like it was breaking over and over again the further she walked away from me.

Not understanding why I couldn't grab her and tell her I felt the exact same way.

"I don't understand." I whispered silently, tears finally falling freely.

--


	100. Conspiracy

**_I'm fully aware of how short the next few chapters are! I'll make sure that I'll go out with a bang and by bang I mean an extra long update, sound decent? You are all awesome!_**

**_Thank you for the wonderful feedback concerning the OC's. I never intended for them to override anything but when I get an idea I have no choice but to run with it. So thank you for your support!_**

_**Enjoy!**_

**76.1 – Conspiracy**

**Ashley's PoV**

Two more days until Spencer and I had to be at work and the girls were back to school.

Two more days of blistering uninterrupted happiness in my bed with the woman of my dreams.

Carmen had taken the girls to the Leafs game in the city and made a weekend out of it. That left the newly engaged couple all alone.

Free to do whatever we pleased.

And pleased we did.

Over and over.

"You're thinking about sex again, aren't you?" Spencer giggled, looking up from her book on her side of the bed.

"Definitely." I moved closer to her side and nibbled on her ear briefly. "I know we need time to cool off for a bit."

Spencer sighed with a lazy smile. "Baby, we've done things we've never done before. I'm still in orgasmic bliss."

Who knew Spencer was _that_ flexible?

"Well we'll be repeating that position frequently." I purred and stood up from the bed. "I'm going to make dinner, any suggestions?"

She pulled on her jersey and wrapped her arms around my waist. "Whatever you decide, I'll eat."

I changed my mind, having dinner alone and naked was all too tempting. I'd starve her if it meant staying in bed for the next two days. "You wanna get out for a bit? We haven't seen Chase and Ephiny since before Christmas. I miss their food." I rubbed my belly.

"I think fresh air might be good for us," Spencer agreed and grabbed a pair of jeans and a sweater. "I'm going to shower, care to join?"

"Uh, duh!" I smirked and followed her towards the bathroom.

--

"So how long were you planning on asking me to marry you?" Spencer asked, her lips wrapped around the straw to her Dr. Pepper. We sat in our regular booth at Rapture.

"Awhile." I smiled shyly. "Lucas and I conspired the whole thing, but I had to change venues since we were going to spend Christmas in Midtown. It worked out a whole lot better than I imagined."

"It was perfect." Spencer whispered in awe. "Was Lucas playing the piano a part of that?"

"Not live?" I squeaked and she chuckled. "I mean I taught her that one music sheet you wrote a long time ago. We were going to have her record it and then I'd play it through the stereo. But…" I watched her eyes twinkle, "since I lost that bet on the ski hill, she got to play it live."

"That was the bet?" Spencer's face was chalked full of surprise when I nodded. "Wow, I don't think I like the idea of you two conspiring against me – especially when she gets older."

"I'm just thankful she likes me." I shrugged a little and grinned. "She calls me Momma and it feels awesome inside Spence."

A dreamy gaze was evident on her face as well. "Yeah, I know how you feel. Dylan's still warming up but whenever she does my heart races."

"Ahhh!" Ephiny came out from the back, clapping her hands. "You're back! Tell me _everything!_"

"Hi to you too, Eph." Spencer smirked and allowed herself to be wrapped up in a hug by the older Wynters woman. "I think we have some good news to tell you."

"Alex has been forgiven so all is right in the Carlin world." I intercepted with an amused grin. "I got to see my family for the first time in over a decade and-"

"-Ashley and I are getting married." Spencer nearly jumped out of her seat with excitement, shoving her left hand in Ephiny's face.

"No shit, for real this time?" Ephiny shot me a smirk and eyed the ring. "That's so beautiful, where'd you get it?"

"Chase helped me pick it out." I winked.

"What?" The older brunette pouted. "But she got to help the last time! She knew?"

"She knew what?" Chase picked that time to come out with our meals with a glow to her. "Extra cheesy nachos for my two favourite little lesbians."

"You knew Ashley was going to propose?" Ephiny peered up at her wife. "You didn't even tell me?"

"I'm sorry babe," Chase kissed Ephiny lightly. "In all fairness Ashley threatened to beat my ass if I did."

"Like you couldn't break that twig in half?"

"Hey!" Spencer and I both shouted.

"I'll make it up to you. I have plenty of secrets that are worthwhile." The blonde winked and went back to work.

"Women." Ephiny shook her head and stood up.

"At least you're getting sex out of it. She said she'd make it up to you, I'm sure she meant with one of your many fantasies." Spencer threw out there casually.

Ephiny stood there briefly with her mouth hung open slightly. "Uh," she cleared her throat, "Chase! Is Jaiden working tonight?!" And she was off.

"You think we'll be like that when we're older?" I asked, watching the older couple embrace in a romantic hug before going their separate ways to work.

"Of course. We're going to be just like we are now." Spencer nodded, wiggling her eyebrows.

"Hot, horny and in love?" I smirked back at her.

"Exactly." She nodded firmly and started to dig into the nachos.

I hoped the girls were having a good time in Winnipeg with Carmen.

I missed my daughters but I had to admit it was nice to finally spend alone time with Spencer.

Alex would be stopping by within the week before heading off to Vancouver then Australia to rehearse for her World Tour.

Spencer and Kyla were already emailing back and forth about the wedding plans.

Even though life looked busy ahead, I had to admit I didn't mind.

I stared at Spencer who was eating quietly with a small smile graced upon her face.

Yeah, I didn't mind one single bit.

That woman was mine forever.

--


	101. And They Called It Puppy Love

**76.2 - And They Called It Puppy Love**

**Lucas' PoV**

School was back in session and I was in no mood to listen to my teacher.

Leafs lost their game and I was depressed.

"Do you have an orange marker?" Blake, a taller boy asked me. His hair was nearly shoulder length and he was rather large for his age but he was nice.

I silently handed my marker to him and he thanked me.

"So what did you do on break?" He grabbed his art sketch book and sat at my table. "My brother and I went to Winnipeg to visit my Dad."

"Cool." I murmured and watched him out of the corner of my eye. He was staring at me and there was a look in his eyes that told me…he liked me. "I went to visit my grandparents in Midtown."

"Where's that?" Blake smiled, really willing to listen to me.

"Near Toronto." I picked up a blue pencil crayon and started to shade some of the paper.

"That's cool." He nodded his head and went back to his book.

I thought for a second he'd be quiet but then I felt him looking at me again. "What?" I sighed, my blonde hair falling over my shoulders as I leaned forward.

"Nothing." Blake blushed and smiled a little. "So uh, you play hockey right?"

"Yes," I nodded, putting down my pencil and giving up hope in having some spare drawing time, "why?"

"I'd like to see you play sometime." Blake shrugged. "I've never seen a girl play hockey."

"Then you need to get a life." I rolled my eyes. "My mom played for Team Canada and won the gold in 2010. She was the best player until she was injured."

"Your mom played pro hockey?" Blake looked absolutely in shock. "That's so cool!"

I had to smile and agree. "Luc?" I heard a voice behind me and noticed Hadley standing there with her favourite writing utensil. "I'm having a hard time shading this apple, can you help me?"

I closed my book quickly and glanced at Blake, giving him an apologetic look. "I'll talk to you later, Blake."

He just waved and sighed, moving back to his assigned seat.

"You looked a little uncomfortable." She giggled softly and gave me her pencil and lightly pushing her book towards me. "Plus I really do need help."

I glanced over the paper and then back up at her. "This isn't an apple, Had."

_**Do you wanna sleepover this weekend?**_

The tiny letters were scribbled across the page with a 'yes' or 'no' check box.

"My house or yours?" I grinned at her, automatically checking yes.

"Mine! My Aunt Tori is taking care of me again and she likes you. She said if you need to be at practice she's more than willing to wake up and take you." Hadley seemed excited and I knew my mom would have no problem with it.

"Oh hey!" I smiled and rested my arms on the table in front of me. "Dylan and I are officially going to be sisters!"

"Really?" Hadley grinned when I nodded. "So Ashley did propose?"

Okay so it was supposed to be kept a secret but I had to tell Hadley. I found myself telling her everything.

"I'm so excited." I whispered.

The bell rang and it was time for recess. The day was sunny enough and it wasn't that cold, in fact it was the first warmest day of the year.

"Dylan!" I screamed as Hadley and I ran towards our favourite spot in the school yard. "Hi!"

"Hey!" She laughed as we slid down the hill backwards a bit after I knocked her into a hug. "Guess what? I'll tell you what! Jason said that every girl has cooties except for me!"

"Aww," Hadley giggled, "well Blake likes your sister."

"I thought you liked her?" Dylan scrunched her face up and I blushed, pushing Dylan in the snow. "What?" She scoffed and brushed herself off.

"I do." Hadley whispered and smiled softly at me.

--

**Jaiden's PoV**

Eliza pulled back breathlessly and straightened her shirt collar, clearing her throat. "I really need to go, Jai."

"Really?" I pouted and pulled her in for another kiss, my arms wrapping around her slim waist.

"We're in the back of your parents' café and I really don't think it's appropriate." She laughed, pushing me away.

"Fine," I sighed and got up off my mom's office chair, straightening my own shirt out, "you're no fun."

"No," she twirled around and kissed me softly, "I'd be no fun if I didn't let your hands wander the way they do."

"You're killing me Lize, really." I groaned and followed her towards the front.

I found Ashley standing at the counter with a to-go coffee up in her hand. She noticed me and smiled, "hey Jai, Eliza."

"Hi Ms. Davies." Eliza smiled politely and slid onto a stool beside her.

"Please Eliza, call me Ashley when we're not in school." The music teacher laughed.

"So where are the brats? I haven't seen them since you got back." I sighed and pouted a little bit. "I kinda miss losing my hard earned money to them."

"If you'd stop swearing like a sailor..." Eliza grinned and squeezed my hand.

"Spencer has them back at her place. I had a late staff meeting and then got held up by Ms. Temple," she rolled her eyes; "she sets my gaydar off."

"Ha!" I slapped the counter with my hand. "I knew it!"

Ashley and Eliza laughed at my outburst and I shrugged.

"Anyway, where are you two lovebirds heading?" She asked while placing a five dollar bill in the tip jar and grabbing her keys.

"I'm just about to drive Lize home, her parents are really strict when they know she's with me." I said proudly. I loved making the parents squirm in their seats.

I was a total badass.

Kinda.

"Yeah, that must suck." Ashley frowned in sympathy. "Feel free to stop by later Jai, I'm sure the girls would love to see you. I think they're going through Jaiden withdrawals."

"I know how that is." Eliza sighed and kissed my cheek.

I blushed.

Badass my...ass.

"I will definitely be there." I nodded and walked out behind the brunette with Eliza right beside me.

The three of us said our 'byes' and took off towards our destinations.

"Thank you for another amazing night," Eliza smiled softly when I pulled into her driveway.

"We just had tacos and did our homework," I quirked a grin and she raised a playful eyebrow, "okay and we totally made out."

"Yea we did," she whispered and leaned towards me, grabbing me by my jacket. "This weekend is going to suck without you. I really don't want to back to Thunder Bay and visit my old friends."

"Why not?" I asked lightly, touching her cold face with my fingertips. "I thought you were thrilled."

Eliza shrugged and kissed me before pulling back. "I just know they'll be asking questions and I-"

"-don't know what to tell them?" I expressed gently.

"It's easier being myself here, you know? Even though I grew up there, a lot of my friends were from Church camp." Eliza smiled a little.

"There's no pressure Liza, I swear. I can just be your very best friend here. I know what you are to me and that's all that matters." I tried my best to make her believe that I meant every word.

"A best friend that kisses so good," she blushed and reached for the door handle. "I'll call you tomorrow when I get there, okay?"

I nodded and pulled her back towards me, giving her one last kiss. "Please be safe? If you end up getting drunk and macking on some hot chick at a party, please get it on video at least?" I winked and she shoved me back with a laugh.

"Once a perv, always a perv, eh Wynters?" She stepped out into the cold. "I'll be safe and if you end up making out with some hot chick, point her out so I can deck her?" She winked back and shut the door, waving cutely before running towards her house.

--


	102. Feisty PreTeen

**_Sorry for the lack of updates lately! I will be honest and say they will be spread out now that I've caught you all up and everything I have. No worries though! Just be patient with me and I promise goodness and happy endings. ENJOY!!_**

**77.1 - Feisty Pre-Teen**

**Spencer's PoV**

It was hard to believe that three months had passed since January. Three short months, and it all went by so fast.

It was the last game of the season for the girls and I had two more weeks of coaching for Jaiden's team. Then I'd be setting my attention fully on the Wedding plans and work.

"Are ya ready Coach?" Ashley bumped my hip with hers as she helped fill up the team's water bottles. She made a really great assistant and I even gave her the responsibility of blowing the whistle when the girls had to change it up.

My proud helper.

I couldn't wait to marry that woman, say our vows, be completely together.

"I'm ready." I grinned widely, knowing I was ready for anything life was going to throw our way.

Ashley stuffed her cold hands in her jacket pockets as she eyed up the girls warming up on the ice. "Is it weird that it's colder in here than it is outside?"

"April showers bring May flowers." I chirped and gave her the signal to blow the whistle.

The team came forward and huddled around me and Ashley. "Alright, so here it is, your last game of the tournament and everyone is banking on us to win the championships three years in a row!"

The team cheered and I could tell they were just as pumped up as I had always been during a huge game.

"We're up by 1 goal and there's less than five minutes left. Now, I have to tell you that winning isn't everything, okay? You've all made me proud. I just want you to play your best, have fun and show them who owns this ice!"

"Woo!" Lucas was the loudest to cheer, swinging her stick in the air.

"On the count of three," I put my fist in first, followed by the teams', then Ashley's cold hand, "one, two, three, Rawr!!"

"Rawr!!" They screamed and were off to their positions on the ice.

"Are you going to be coaching next hockey season?" Ashley asked me, biting her nails in anticipation as the puck dropped in front of Dylan and her opponent.

"We'll see." I smiled and continued to cheer on my favourite hockey team.

Lucas had mentioned that she wanted to play for the rest of her life but also wanted to pursue something with her art. She was showing more interest in her art club, art classes and sketched almost everything in sight.

Dylan wanted to play hockey for the rest of her life as well, her drive was so strong for it that she asked if she could enter a three day hockey camp during the summer. Ashley didn't even question her, she just nodded and asked where to sign a parental sheet.

"Penalty on #5!" The referee blew the whistle and pointed Lucas towards the penalty box. I raised my hands in the air at her and frowned.

She just looked smug.

I couldn't even rip into her for it because I played the exact same way.

"You couldn't have done something before we entered under two minutes of the third period?" I heard Ashley question her, with a raised eyebrow.

"Chill Momma," Lucas took off her helmet and threw her stick over towards me, "Dyl's got this in the bag."

Ashley turned to look at me and shrugged, turning her focus back on the game.

Lucas was banging on the glass, hollering at Dylan to pull back. They had their own language when it came to game time, talking in riddles to throw the other players off.

Carmen and I taught them that, it worked 99% of the time.

"Skate! Faster!" Ashley screeched as Dylan's small frame took her across the rink faster than you could blink.

She stopped right in front of an opponent and looked down to where the puck was passed to her by another teammate. Dylan grinned and flicked the puck quickly between her legs before she swung her stick again. The puck ricocheted off the post in an angle and dropped right in the net, over the goal line.

The buzzer went off.

Legion Lions won!

The team was hugging and congratulating each other before they were back on the ice to shake their opponents' hands. I was right behind them and when I got to the coach, he stopped me before I turned around.

"Coach Carlin, I just wanted to congratulate you on your much success. What is your secret?" The older guy gave me a soft grin.

"Patience, Coach Perch, a lot of it." I returned the soft grin and made my way back towards my team. They held the trophy high above their heads, cheering and laughing.

After they lined up to receive their much earned gold medals, the locker rooms were full of high energetic 9 to 11 year olds.

"I'm gonna miss you in this jacket," Ashley brushed her lips over my cheek as her fingers trailed over the 'Coach Carlin' embroidery.

I pushed myself off the wall by the water fountains and smiled, grabbing her by the belt loops. "I'll model it for you whenever you want." I wiggled my eyebrows and she grinned widely, nodding.

"You're seriously thinking about hanging up your whistle?" She asked with her eyes full of concern. I watched as she placed the whistle in the palm of her hand.

"I guess we'll see how work is come October," I shrugged a little with a true smile. "Something tells me that I won't stop coaching Legion Lions for a couple of more years, not until Dylan's old enough to move onto the next age group."

"Hi Miss Carlin, Miss Davies!" Jason, Dylan's best friend, came bounding down the hall towards us.

"Hi Jase," Ashley responded kindly. She adored the smaller blonde boy, never knowing when to say no to Dylan when she asked if he could go and play at their house, or ours.

"Can Dylan come over for dinner? My mom said it was cool and she wouldn't mind talking to one of you, if you want." His piercing blue eyes landed on me and I looked to Ashley.

"Of course, let me go and talk with her." Ashley smiled and excused herself, leaving me with the boy who held our nine year old's heart in his hand.

"So what are your intentions with Dylan?" I asked, scratching behind my ear.

"What?" He blinked at me confused and I groaned, realizing I had to wait a few more years before questioning any girls or boys that come knocking on our door.

"Nevermind." I almost pouted and was interrupted by Dylan and Lucas turning the corner to make their way over to meet me.

"Jase!" Dylan beamed, her brown eyes sparkling as usual when Jason was around.

"Awesome goal, Dyl!" Jason wrapped his arms around the small brunette in a hug and I bit my lip hard.

"Wasn't it wicked? I totally knew she could get one more goal in there." Lucas beamed proudly and twirled her hockey stick around. "Where's Momma?"

"She went to talk to Jason's. They're eating dinner at his place tonight." I smiled and played with her long blonde ponytail.

We met Ashley up at the concession, finding her in a conversation with another woman that wasn't Jason's mother.

Laughter ripped through the blonde as she ran her hand down Ashley's arm.

Lucas whipped her head in my direction, silently asking me if I just saw what she did. Her grey eyes narrowed and she threw her hockey gear in an empty seat before taking a spot next to her other mother.

"Hey Luc," Ashley's warm brown eyes welcomed her and she wrapped an arm around her shoulder, "ready to go?"

Lucas stared at the other woman who touched my woman. "Yes, your fiancée is missing you, I'm starving and watching this conversation is a little boring."

"Lucas!" I hissed and laughed, stepping up to the three older women. "Sorry, when she's hungry, she's very feisty."

Ashley shook her head but smirked a little. "It's okay Spence, I was a little bored myself."

The blonde looked more than offended and turned around to walk away. "What was that all about?" I asked, more curious than anything. It would take a lot more than some blonde to make me jealous.

"She overheard me asking Patricia if it was okay Dylan go over there for dinner. She wanted to know if Dylan had a father and if I was married, blah." Ashley rolled her eyes and looked at Lucas, "thanks for rescuing me."

Lucas shrugged and smirked. "No big Ma, I'll always have your back."

--


	103. An Unexpected Decision

**_A/N: Well after weeks of debating where exactly to take this next, I've finally decided just how Points will end! A few chapters will be fillers to help bridge gaps in-between. If you all have questions for this chapter, let me just start by saying there is a __point__ to this _unexpected decision_ for our Spashley. _**

_**Sorry for the wait!! You all rock with your patience and replies, thank you. I think I'm back on track! I missed this fic but I'll still be working on my newest fan fic, ****In Any Other World (Bellice - Twilight)****.**** We'll get this baby finished, I promise!!**_

_**Enjoy!**_

**77.2 - An Unexpected Decision**

**Ashley's PoV**

"I'm just saying you should really ask before making my office your designated make-out spot, Jai." I looked at her pointedly and notice the blush crawl up Eliza's neck.

"I'm sorry, I just figured it'd be safer in here than in a janitor's closet. I mean really, who thinks doing it in a closet is hot?" She rolled her blue eyes and snorted when I cleared my throat. "You and Spence we're pretty hot for each other back in high school, weren't you?"

"Jaiden!" Eliza snickered and slapped her girlfriend's leg. "We weren't doing _it _at all, Miss Davies, I swear. That'd be beyond weird on so many levels."

"Can we make this our spot?" Jaiden smiled innocently.

"No." I packed up my briefcase and grabbed my coat.

"But you just... but... so not fair!" The brunette teenager huffed and followed me out of the office. "It's after school hours, I don't get the big deal."

"The big deal is I don't want to walk in here and watch you and Liza go at it when I have work to do." I scolded lightly.

"You sound like my mom." Jaiden mocked and grabbed her backpack.

"Which one?" I asked with a raised eyebrow.

"Which one what?"

"Which mom do I sound like?" I was slightly amused, not matter which answer she gave me.

"Chase." Jaiden rolled her eyes. "She's always on my case about things and Ephiny always tries to see things my way then they get in a fight and have make-up sex." She gagged on the ending of her sentence and it had Eliza and I cracking up. "I can't believe I just said that with a straight face."

"If you're a shining example of what Luc and Dyl will be like at your age, I can't say I'm too thrilled." I locked up the music room behind us and we escaped the school.

"What exactly are you trying to say?" She stopped and stared at me.

"That you're a hormonal crazed teenager and I'm not looking forward to the birds and the bees talk just yet." I unlocked the doors to the mustang and heard Jaiden belt out a laugh before running to catch up.

"Sorry Ash, but Luc already knows about the birds and bees. She's really smart." Her blue eyes sparkled and climbed into the back of my vehicle with her girlfriend. "Try being raised with a pure mind with my parents, Spencer and Carmen running around. Not possible. And if you think about it, Lucas is the cool big sister; she'll explain it all to Dylan herself. You won't have to peep a single word."

Okay, so maybe I wasn't too worried about Lucas. She was a little lesbian like the rest of us but my little Dylan was otherwise. I couldn't think about it because she still had years before...

Yeah...I just wouldn't think about it.

We pulled up to Rapture and I found my family in our booth, like I did every Friday night.

"Hey there cutie," Jaiden slid in next to Lucas and popped a kiss on the top of her head, "did you score with Had yet?"

"Jaiden," Spencer tilted her head and kicked the teen's shin under the table, "please don't talk like that."

"If you mean score by kissing, then yes." Lucas shot back with a wiggle of her eyebrows.

"What?!" Spencer and I both looked in the smaller blonde's direction.

"Oh please," Lucas rolled her eyes, "it was bound to happen. Besides, she kissed me and it would've been rude to just stand there and do nothing."

"Oh God I don't wanna hear it!" Spencer looked up at me pleadingly.

"I think you're freaking your parents out," Jaiden knocked fists with the blonde, "nice." She got up and waved bye to the table while dragging Eliza towards the back.

"How was your day?" I asked my fiancée, leaning over the table to give her a kiss.

"Ugh," Spencer looked down at her Dr. Pepper, "I had a few upset children come through today. Heartbreaking."

Spencer never really talked about her work and if she did, it was usually in short words and not around the girls.

If she had a real long and hard day, I'd run her a bath and we'd both soak in it after the girls were in bed; she'd usually spill everything out, trusting me to keep it all a secret.

I had a feeling tonight would be one of those nights.

Spencer and I still hadn't decided where we were going to move. Both of our houses were perfect, had a perfect view of the lake and we could make a rink work in my lake front. However, she had more space, more memories and a better hideout from the public traffic.

"How was your day, Momma?" Dylan asked me softly with a small smile.

"It was good," I nodded, "yours?"

"Jason invited me to his place next weekend again. He said that Lukey and Hadley could come over too." Dylan's brown eyes beamed with happiness.

"Great, already starting with the double dating." Spencer cracked a smile and winked at Dylan, who blushed and shook her head wildly.

--

I slid in behind Spencer, both of us moaning quietly at our wet skin sliding together. The aroma of the bath bubbles set off a calm environment. We both had our hair up in loose ponytails and I could tell she was already relaxing more and more.

"You okay baby?" I whispered, my lips trailing softly over her shoulders, my arms wrapping tightly around her waist.

"Yes," she sighed and leaned back into me, my chin resting on her shoulder. "Could you just hold me forever?"

I smiled against her wet skin and nodded. "Forever and ever."

"Can I ask you something?" Spencer nearly whispered, her wet fingers lacing through mine as they rested on her flat stomach.

"Anything." I kissed her temple. "What's on your mind Spence?"

She took in a deep breath and brought my fingers to her lips. "What were your thoughts when you knew Dylan was in the system?"

I could faintly feel the bile wanting to rise up in my throat when I pictured her broken face while telling me about her homes. My heart shattered just a little more and I knew that it wouldn't go away anytime soon. I knew that I'd feel that way forever, the guilt would consume me at times but I fought hard to keep it bay by reflecting on what I had at that moment.

"I felt guilty for even allowing it to happen." I finally spoke after clearing my throat. "I was so angry at myself and then I let myself believe that I didn't deserve to be that happy again. I failed the first time in getting her back."

"I don't mean to bring up such painful memories." Spencer softly said while turning her body around carefully. She was facing me and slid her legs over my hips, splashing a little bit of water in the tiled floor in my bathroom. "I had this father who came in last week," she inhaled and closed her eyes, "he was turning himself in because he said he couldn't be trusted with his three year old son. He was mentally unstable and the mother had taken off with some other person in the middle of the night."

I frowned and rubbed my hands gently up and down her arms. It hurt me to see her in so much pain.

"Matthew still needs a home and it seems that the only place so far is a group home." Spencer shuddered and dropped her head. "Those places are not that safe, you know?"

"I'm so sorry Spencer." I pulled her close and she sunk into me perfectly.

"This kind of thing just breaks my heart. A three year old is just too young to be exploited to that type of environment. _Any _child, no matter what age, shouldn't ever have to feel what that's like."

I swallowed again, closing my eyes. "I know I've made mistakes-"

Her fingers were pressed against my lips and she shook her head with a light smile. "Ash, many children are passed through because of your same situation. You're a very responsible adult and yes, it only took one drink to almost take that all away from you but you held on. You held on even after falling backwards the first time. Do you know how many parents can say the same thing? Less than three out of ten."

I didn't say anything because I didn't know what to say. I knew she was right but I still had a hard time believing in myself. Sometimes.

"I just want to find him a nice home." Spencer finally said after a moment of silence. "If I could have a house big enough for all those kids, I'd do it."

I smiled and kissed her forehead. "You have a big soft heart Carlin, you know that?"

"I don't know what to do." Spencer shrugged. "The group homes are getting fuller by the second and the last potential foster parent I interviewed was only concerned about the payments she'd be getting. I can't _stand_ that."

"So..." I bit my lip and wrapped my arms around her neck, playing with the loose blonde strands that had fallen.

"So?" Spencer peered at me with her shimmering blue eyes.

"Why not keep searching for a really great home for him," I smiled softly, "and in the meantime, we can keep him with us."

Spencer leaned back with wide eyes and shook her head before blinking again. "You want to foster Matthew?"

"I've always wanted a boy." I grinned a little and squeezed her slightly. "I know it'll be temporary and I know how Lucas has attachment issues but think about it. Until you can provide a safe home for him, we can be his safe house."

"You do realize I can't do this with every child that comes through and breaks my heart, right?" Spencer whispered with a cute frown on her face.

"I know but knowing you can help where you can will give others hope as well. It's just an idea Spencer," I offered politely, "but I saw the look in your eyes when I mentioned it."

"It's a lot of responsibility." Spencer said slowly, her forehead pressed against my shoulder for a brief moment. "He kind of reminded me of Dylan when I first saw her," she said hesitantly, "so broken and lost."

I couldn't help but feel a pang in my chest and I squeezed her closer to me. "Maybe that's another reason why you should consider my option." I whispered softly. "This boy seems to need a sense of guidance and I know you'll do your best in finding him a great home. You and your dad are a lot alike."

Spencer's blue eyes searched mine and she smiled a little. "You'd really want to do this with me?"

"Baby, I would do anything with you." I kissed the tip of her nose. "I get your hesitancy as well so don't feel pressured about it. I just wanted you to know that I'm here for you."

Spencer's mood seemed to have lightened up instantly. Her hands laced together behind my neck as she pulled me closer to her. Our lips met in a soft, long and sensual kiss. Although any kind of her kisses could send me into hormonal overdrive, that time was different. We just kissed for sake of feeling close and together.

Not too long afterwards, the water was drained from the tub and we were both dried off, heading towards our bedroom in my house. Like every other night, we made a stop at the girls' rooms to make sure they were safe. And like every other night, Spencer would wrap her arm around my waist and guide us towards our bedroom, no matter what house we were at.

After we both slid under the covers, I felt her hover on her elbow, her blue eyes were so vibrant I could see them staring back at me in the dark. "We need to figure something out," she whispered.

"What's that?" I tucked some damp strands of hair behind her ear.

"We need to figure out where we're going to live." She grinned sheepishly. "I don't care where we choose to live Ash. I just think we need to start discussing our options. I will not marry you and still live in two separate houses."

I laughed softly and kissed her gently, pulling her closer to my body. Her head rested on my shoulder gently while I caressed her shoulder and bare back. "I was thinking about that..."

"I don't want to pressure you," Spencer traced imaginary lines along my collarbone, "because I know you worked on this place."

"I did." I nodded and squeezed her once. "You worked hard on your place too."

"I did." She snickered against my skin and sunk deeper into my body, making herself comfortable for the night. "Whenever you're ready or whatever you decide, just say the word and the move will begin." She yawned and I knew that her eyes had closed the moment my hands touched her bare skin.

"I love you Spencer." I kissed the top of her head and she sighed, murmuring the words back to me.

--


	104. Spencer, the Hero

**78.1 Spencer, the Hero**

**Spencer's PoV**

The weather was starting to warm up fast and I had declared it was no longer safe for the girls to be playing near the docks or on the ice. Lucas pouted but had Dylan help her set up the nets on the driveway where they spent the majority of their free time when they weren't in school.

Lucas had found her art group to be fascinating and said as long as she had that to hang to, she could survive a whole summer without playing hockey. Her art mattered that much to her.

Dylan became quite the popular girl at school and had a birthday party to attend almost every other weekend. Of course she'd make sure her sister was invited because she still liked that feeling of being safe near Lucas.

Ashley had been busy with her work and lessons. She was informed that the school board would like her to be in charge of the school's year end performance and Ashley freaked for a while before she found herself getting into it more and more. She'd have Jaiden over where they'd go through different music that was appropriate enough to play at the school.

"It brings memories back of me and Alex staying up late to go over different song choices." Ashley smiled a little as she sat at the breakfast bar, her hair up in a tight ponytail with a pair of loose old jeans and a tight tee.

I smiled and placed my coffee spoon in the sink before taking me seat beside her. "I bet you were happy."

"I was." Ashley bit her lip and glanced at me. "It's a total different happiness though, Spence."

"Oh I know." I nodded and kissed her cheek. "It's the same when I was on the road and playing in a new arena almost every night. The next team would be harder than the first and my adrenaline would be pumping hardcore but I lived for that feeling after everything else." I placed a hand on her lower back and peeked over her shoulder. "What is that?" I asked as she marked up an older piece of paper.

Ashley bit her lip and shrugged. "I kept all of the stuff Alex and I didn't use on her albums. I figured we could incorporate these into our concert at the end of the school year."

"I wish I could've seen you work." I flopped down in the stool across from her. "No fair, you got to see my play and I didn't get to see you at work."

"Sure you did." Ashley gave me a slow shy smile. "That day when you found me playing piano at my parent's place." A sadness reached the end of her sentence but I could tell she swallowed it away. "I was playing then, writing something for you."

"Really?" I asked softly and grinned. "I totally made you lose concentration didn't I?"

"Well you did beg for Dirty Davies to come out and play." Ashley purred slightly and winked, going back to looking over old music sheets. "That was one of the best sexual experience I've ever had." She murmured with a slight blush.

"Reeeally?" I leaned over the counter to get her to look at me. "Wanna repeat that morning?"

Ashley raised an eyebrow and dropped her pen, cupping my face in her soft hands. "Time and place baby."

I giggled. I had come to the conclusion that giggling was no longer embarrassing when it occurred around Ashley. She found it adorable and it often earned me kisses.

"I'll keep that in mind." I nodded and sat back, taking a sip of my coffee. "So since it is P.D. Day, the girls are going to be heading over to Hadley's. What time are you off?"

"Oh um," Ashley scratched behind her neck laughing slightly. "I'm actually not going to work today."

I raised an eyebrow. "Just because the kids have no school doesn't mean you get to skip as well." I teased lightly.

"Come on, I never get to skip anymore!" Ashley pouted and she wasn't playing around. "Besides, they can't fire me. I'm the best person they have on that faculty that can do music."

"A little high on yourself?" I snickered and got up to rinse my coffee cup out. "Just don't let the girls think it's okay to skip work." I kissed the top of her head.

"Thank you." Ashley smirked and pulled me onto her lap, nuzzling my neck. "But the girls can still go to Hadley's and we can spend an entire day in bed..."

I bit my lip and shivered when her hands started to unbutton my shirt. Just before I allowed her hands to slip any further, I snapped out of it. "No!" I jumped off her lap and waved my finger in her direction. "I would love to but I'm meeting with Matthew and his case worker today."

"Oh." Ashley all of a sudden became serious as she pushed her music sheets away. "Why didn't you tell me?"

"I know!" I immediately felt horrible. "I've been fighting with this decision since it was brought up a few nights ago. I wasn't sure what the best approach would be." Ashley stood up and wrapped her arms around my waist. "I wasn't meaning to keep it a secret, I'm sorry."

"What time is the meeting?" She whispered, her fingers drawing circles on my back lightly.

"After lunch, around 1pm." I said softly.

"Let me get ready." Ashley kissed my cheek and I stopped her before she could race up the stairs. "Spence, I'm coming with you."

"You don't have too." I wasn't sure what kind of reaction that environment would do to her. It was hard for her to step into my work place without memories of Dylan being there without her.

"Is this meeting the final decision on whether or not we can foster him?" Ashley spoke calmly and evenly. Her brown eyes showed a sense of determination and I knew she had won the decision. I silently nodded and so did she before prying herself away from my grasp gently and making her way up to the room to change.

Ashley emerged from upstairs in a simple suit. Her black slacks fit perfectly with a light blue buttoned up shirt. Her outfit complimented my grey slacks with a white buttoned up shirt. She had her hair down in loose waves with light make-up on. Walking past me silently, she grabbed her set of keys and looked at me expectantly.

"Ash, the meeting is in four hours." I said as I approached her.

"I know but we have to show we're responsible, right?" Ashley bit her lip and looked down at her keys slightly before her gaze caught mine. "So I'll go to work and attend the boring meetings until lunch, come see you and we can bring Matthew home," she grabbed my hand, "together."

Only that woman could knock the air out of my lungs with her sweet words and caring touch. "Okay," I simply nodded and brought her hand up to my lips, kissing her knuckles softly.

"Come on, I'm late as it is." Ashley managed to smile as we grabbed our purses and keys, shutting the door behind us.

Just as we stepped out onto the driveway, a white car pulled up.

"Tori's here!" Dylan smiled and helped Lucas put the nets and sticks back onto the grass area of the yard. The snow was still in patches but most of it had been melted away by the warm sun.

We watched the young brunette adult get out of the car and walked towards us. "Sorry I'm late," she apologized as she pushed her sunglasses on the top of her head.

"My fault!" Hadley grinned sheepishly as she helped the girls clean up quickly before we found the three of them surrounding us.

"Thank you for having the girls today." Ashley ran her fingers through Dylan's hair while smiling. "I'm sure Jaiden would've watched them if you were busy."

"Please," Tori waved her hand and ran her hand through her long brown hair, blinking away the bright sun, "I promised Hadley a play date anyway."

I caught Lucas and Hadley rolling their eyes with a smile. "Aunt Tori, we're a little old for you to be calling it a play date."

"Oh right, excuse me." Tori laughed and punched her niece's shoulder lightly. "She didn't like me being called a babysitter when she was five because she wasn't a baby anymore."

"Hey!" Hadley pouted, throwing her blonde curls around as she dragged her two friends towards the car.

"We'll pick them up before dinner." I offered.

"No hurry." The brunette grinned and placed her sunglasses back on her head. "I'll be here all weekend with Hadley so I'm sure she'll want them around as much as possible. I'm a boring Aunt, didn't you know?" She laughed. "Really, whenever you two are ready to pick them up just drop by. I can't guarantee they'll be ready though." She shrugged with a smile.

I've always like Tori, she seemed very level headed. I was a little more than shocked that Jaiden hadn't developed a crush on her.

Ashley had offered to drop me off at work even though it was a little more than five minutes out of her way. She kissed me softly before I hopped out of the car and watched her drive away.

"Morning Miss Carlin." Ryn grinned at me from her desk and handed me messages and a few files.

"Morning Ryn." I rolled my eyes and leaned against the front of her desk. "Sorry I'm late."

"It's okay. The conference call with the Board was cancelled anyway." Ryn shrugged.

"Isn't it always?" I muttered and grabbed a coffee mug from behind the desk while pouring myself another hot cup of the liquid caffeine. "Did you get those papers ready for later?"

Ryn's green eyes lit up as she flipped back her red hair and nodded. "I can't believe you two are going be bringing another child into your home."

"Yeah," I nodded, "Ashley is rather excited."

"The girls?" The redhead followed me back towards my office.

Ashley and I had told the girls of the _potential_ of having Matthew live with us and they didn't bat an eyelash. Lucas said as long as Dylan wasn't going anywhere, she'd be happy either way. Dylan seemed a little more apprehensive and embarrassedly admitted that this boy would take attention away from her and Lucas.

We assured them otherwise.

"Excited." I answered honestly. "Luc is always welcoming but I think with her closeness with Dylan, I don't think she'll be as attached to this one."

"I read his background." Ryn sat on the corner of my desk, watching me tidy up the office a bit. "I think you guys will be doing him a huge favour."

"I know." I sighed and turned to face her. "I just know I can't do this with every broken child that comes through my office."

"We both know that," Ryn's face softened a bit, "but starting here and there helps you know? He can look back and say that your family changed his life. When he's older and people ask him about his childhood, he can talk about a wonderful couple that took him in, found him a perfect home and know it was because of your kind heart and generosity." She paused and glanced towards the pictures of Dylan and Lucas cluttering my office. "Just like Dylan. You made her feel loved even before you knew who her mother was. She was already looking at you like you were her biggest hero."

I bit my lip and picked up a picture of Dylan's first photo with us. She was so skinny and shy but looking happy as Lucas's arm was around her shoulder and she was settled between my legs. "You're right." I nodded and placed the frame back down.

"Thata girl!" Ryn cheered softly and made her way towards the door. "You're ten o'clock will be here soon. Did you want me to just send them in?"

And so my day began.

--


	105. Love At First Sight

_You are all awesome and amazing. Truly. Thank you, every single one of you. -heart-_

**78.2 - Love At First Sight**

**Spencer's PoV**

My hand settled on top of Ashley's leg. She couldn't sit still as we sat in my office alone. "Ash," I grabbed her hand when she began to chew on her nails, "stop. It's okay to be nervous but you're going to chew your whole nail off." I twisted my face up slightly and she sighed, bringing her hands back down to her lap.

"What's taking them so long? I thought you had some sort of authority here." Ashley mumbled cutely and got up from her chair, pacing the floor slowly.

"I had to do the same with Dylan, you know. It wasn't all rainbows and sunshine. I took her with me that first night but I still had meetings to go through and an interview process." I said gently and grabbed her hand softly, pulling her to me. "We'll be fine, I swear."

"I know." Ashley said nervously. "I just keep thinking about the pain he's been through. A mother ran out on him and his father was so far gone when he'd lay a hand on him..." she paused, her eyes beginning to water. "He must be feeling so confused."

I pulled her close and she buried her face in my neck. I could feel her body start to shake a bit and I knew that she was shedding tears she needed to. "I know baby," I rubbed her back lightly.

"How do you deal with this?" Ashley pulled back, wiping her face with her hands. I handed her some tissues off my desk and she thanked me.

"It's not easy." I said honestly. "You said it the best though," I tucked hair behind her ear, "these children can come in here and leave knowing that we'll find the best home possible. Ashley, we try and run a very clean and strict environment around here. We really dig deep into the parents who want to foster and go through every detail of their lives and living habits. Kenora is small compared to other cities, it's easier for us to try and control the housing and all parties involved. Dylan was in a larger city where some departments and social services aren't as thorough."

"I really love your dad," she whispered. "I'm really thankful for him and what he's done for us."

I nodded and helped her calm down a bit before there was a knock at the door. "Come in."

Ryn opened the door and smiled softly as the case worker shook our hands and handed us papers to be filled out. He also gave us a list of items Matthew would need, a monthly budget and we'd have our first home visit within the next couple of weeks.

"I'm sure you'll do more than fine, Miss Carlin." Mr. Jenkins nodded confidently. "As always, it's a pleasure working with you."

Mr. Jenkins was a fine case worker for children. He was one of the best we had and I would be sorry to see him go when and if the day arrived.

Ryn moved into the hallway, allowed the man out and then she came back in with a three year old Matthew trailing behind her shyly.

"Oh he's precious." Ashley merely whispered as she watched him cling to Ryn's legs in a death grip.

Matthew Aaron Rule had a head full of the darkest brown curls and blazing green wide eyes. He was so quiet and small but the moment his eyes locked onto Ashley's, I noticed a flicker of something happen behind those innocent eyes.

"Hi Matthew." Ashley got down on her knees and just stayed there quietly, watching him as he stared at her with some sort of amazement. "My name's Ashley."

Matthew tilted his small head and stepped a little away from Ryn and closer to Ashley. "Mattew."

Ryn and I exchanged smiles as I knelt down beside Ashley, watching those curious green eyes focus on me. "My name is Spencer, do you remember me?"

Matthew softly nodded his head before he took interest in my fiancée once again. "Ashy." He pointed to her and when Ashley nodded, he grinned, showing his baby teeth.

Slowly, the boy made his way into Ashley's open arms where he pressed his face tight against her neck, his tiny fingers clutching onto her shirt while he buried himself away. Ashley turned to look at me with tears in her eyes while her hand started to run through his curls and leaning her cheek against his head.

I just witnessed what most dreamers would call it; love at first sight.

I knew that it wasn't Lucas I had to worry about getting attached to this beautiful little boy, but the brown eyed woman in front of me didn't look like she was ready to let go anytime soon.

Ashley and I had come prepared with a car seat already secured in the back of her mustang. She bought it before the meeting and we made plans to go shopping for everything Matthew would need after we had him in our care.

Ashley held the three year old in her arms as she stood up, his face shyly secured in her neck. "Isn't he precious?"

"Yes." I smiled softly and ran my fingers through his curls while kissing Ashley on the cheek.

"Aww." Ryn stood there with a hand held up to her chest. "He's usually painfully shy with strangers holding him."

Ashley's smile lit up the room with pride. "I'm really glad I thought of this."

"Me too." I whispered honestly and grabbed the papers off my desk. "I'm going to start filling these out and then get you to sign them, kay?"

Ashley nodded and pointed down towards the hall. "Matthew and I will be in the play area."

Ryn grinned and watched the two take off, Ashley whispering things in the little boy's ear. "Wow, I don't think it's Luc you have to worry about."

"Exactly what I was thinking." I chuckled and sat down in my chair. "I've seen Ashley's eyes light up so many times but this was different. It was almost as if she held her own child for the first time." I could picture her face when Dylan was born and that made me happy.

Ashley was finally putting some pieces together of her jagged past and mending them slowly. Matthew was helping her just as much as she was helping him.

"Well once you're done here, give them to me and I'll do my part of the job." Ryn smiled and sat down across from me as I filled out the all-too familiar forms. "Matthew has asthma but from what I was told, he doesn't have anything to help him with it."

I looked at her and nodded, "We'll make him an appointment. I want to make sure he's healthy."

The rest of the day went rather smoothly. I had made an appointment for Matthew for the following morning. Ashley was a little upset that she couldn't come with us but I assured her we'd stop by and see her for lunch. She seemed more than thrilled.

Matthew finally felt the heavy day of events take a toll on him and passed out in the backseat of the car in the Walmart parking lot.

"You think we got him everything he needs?" Ashley asked worriedly and glanced back at his sleeping form.

"Everything and more." I rolled my eyes a little and smiled when she blushed. "You so went all out with Dylan, didn't you?"

Ashley nodded. "She was way worse Spence," she blushed, "I had no one there to tell me when to stop. I ended up selling most of the stuff realizing she didn't need it or wouldn't be interested in them."

"Well," I held up a few bags from one of our carts, "I think it's safe to say this kid will never be bored."

"Are you sure you still have Lucas's old bed?" She turned to look at me. She was just so fucking adorable with Matthew.

"Yes baby, I promise. It's all wrapped up nicely in the basement. We'll let it air out and in the meantime, we'll place him on the spare bed while he naps."

Ashley nodded and got into the car after the last of bags were stuffed in every possible spot in the car. "I over did it, didn't I?"

I couldn't help but bring her hand to my lips, kissing lightly. "No baby. You did everything perfectly."

Her eyes sparkled as she pulled out of the lot.

--


	106. The Engraved Guitar

_Playing catch up with our lovely Alexis Carlin - which is why it's so short! Thought we'd check in with her... seeing as she'll back in the picture in the close future!_

_Thank you ALL! Much love._

**79.1 - The Engraved Guitar**

**Alex's PoV**

Flashes blinded me as I stepped off the tour bus and found myself bombarded with fans and the paparazzi.

"Alex!"

"Alex! Over here!"

"Alex! Marry me!"

"Alex, I love you!"

"I want your baby!"

Scream after scream and cry after cry wafted through the long alleyway towards the backdoor entrance at the arena in New York City.

The past couple of months have been so busy I'd barely had any time to think. It was nice though, I had to admit. I was feeling a little less pressured knowing I didn't have to worry about late night phone calls or breaking a heart when I said I wouldn't be coming home because there had been a hold up.

"Alex!" I heard a familiar voice and turned around to find Marissa, my personal assistant, following me with her hands full of my personal dressing room stuff.

"Rissa!" I laughed and immediately helped her take half the stuff that was weighing her down. "I told you to wait; I would've helped you after rehearsal."

Her blonde hair fell over her eyes as she blushed. "I guess I couldn't hear you over the screaming."

I snickered and was led by guards to my dressing room for the next two nights. My name was plastered on it and everything I had requested to be in the room was there. Stuff like bottles of water, gummy bears and ice cream. I noticed tons of flowers scattered the room, most of them from fans and some from business people around the city, wishing me luck.

"Aww!" Marissa cooed when she noticed a blue teddy bear sitting in my make up chair. "How cute!"

I grinned and grabbed it, taking the small card from its collar and turned it over.

_Wishing you the best of luck on the last leg of your tour.  
Much love, Tracey._

I bit my lip and tucked the tiny card into my pocket before placing the bear on the counter against the mirrors.

"These are from your parents!" Marissa squealed at the massive bouquets of orchids and lilies. They always sent me more than they should when I was on tour. With this concert being my first in the US of this year, they seemed to have gone all out, welcoming me back onto their Continent.

I glanced over towards the couch and noticed my favourite blanket from Spencer's, gently draped over the back of it. "Oh guys!" I said to no one with a big smile on my face before plopping head first into the couch, inhaling the smell of my sister and her family. It made me miss home so much.

"Alex?" Marissa held up her hand and pointed towards the wall where my old guitar was placed carefully on a stand.

I frowned and got up, walking slowly towards the instrument and stared at it before picking it up. I turned it over and in my own etching there was 'Samantha Taylor' engraved in the back. The guitar I wrote my first hit song on. The guitar I helped try to teach Sammy on. The guitar I gave to her years ago.

There was no card, no tag, no note, no nothing. I don't remember how long I held the guitar in my hand for but Marissa was gently taking it out of my grasp and placing it back gently.

"Don't take this the wrong way," she started as we sat down on the couch, "but it seems that you're more heartbroken by your non-breakup with Sam then your real one with Tracey."

My eyes snapped to hers and she just shrugged. I knew she didn't mean it in a mean way but the fact that she was right, kind of made me angrier with myself. "I should get out there to rehearse."

Marissa didn't try and stop me. She just let me go and I did my own thing.

Before I knew it, the day was gone and I hit the stage to do a 90minute concert, kicking off my first concert in the States from my world tour. I really did enjoy myself out on stage and I was glad that the fans were just as energetic as I was. I didn't want the tour to come to an end because I realized I missed that sense of freedom to be me. To do something I love and forget about reality for a better part of the night.

I showered in my dressing room and was greeted with a few fans that had won backstage passes.

"Hey everyone!" I smiled and sat down across from them in my dressing room. I shooed the big intimidating guards away and saw the three young females visibly relax. "I guess they have to assume some fans to be psychos."

They laughed and settled further into the couch.

"So this is going to be a part of your tour documentary," Marissa said as a camera man started rolling footage, "just act natural."

"If you're thirsty, help yourself to a drink in the mini fridge." I offered politely and smiled as they all shook their heads. "Please, make yourself at home."

"Are you sad that your tour is coming to an end?" The blonde girl asked. I glanced down at her name tag briefly before settling back in my seat.

"Well Jill, I am almost in tears just thinking about it. I think is one of my best tours to date..."

So another long tour was about end and I had to say for the first time since I've started playing music, I had truly enjoyed it all. I was able to find a sense of myself along the way and it helped that other people were noticing the difference as well.

I was determined to finish this last leg with everything I had to offer. I wasn't going to hold back because that was all I had done for the past twelve years.

I would play things I never thought I'd play again...I'd even play my acoustics on my 'Samantha Taylor' guitar.

Maybe...I'd even play for her.

--


	107. Collecting Attitude

**_It may not seem like it, but the countdown is on folks! Wait for it... ... eventually. _**

**_Enjoy!_**

**79.2 – Collecting Attitude**

**Lucas' PoV**

"Matthew!" I threw my bag onto the staircase and chased him around as he held a tight grip on one of my hockey collectable cards. "I told you not to touch these!"

"Ukus!" He sat down in the middle of the kitchen floor and started to pout. I noticed his eyes start to water and before I could even say anything, he let out a loud wail, flinging the card across the room.

"Shh!" I panicked and knelt down beside him. "I'm sorry! Please don't cry?" I looked around the living room when I heard footsteps coming closer. "Please?"

"What happened?" Momma set down the laundry basket on the breakfast bar and frowned.

"Ashy!" Matthew immediately stopped crying and grinned over at Momma. "Ashy!" He said again, his arms opening up while he ran over to her.

Momma gave me a confused look. "Why was he crying Lucas?"

"I yelled at him." I got up off the floor after picking up my card and held it up. "He was about to make this his snack."

She ran her hands through his curls and looked at him. "You like to get your little fingers on everything and anything, don't you?"

"He shouldn't have had it in the first place." I said with a tone that didn't exactly make her smile at me.

"Well we have the gate up so he can't climb the stairs, which means they were left out." She set Matthew down and we both watched him run into the living room, making a dive for his toy trucks.

"So this is my fault?" I raised an eyebrow and she sighed.

"Lucas, I don't know why you insist I think everything is your fault lately." Momma began to fold the laundry right there and she eyed me up when I didn't make a move to leave. "Did I upset you in any way?"

I was feeling a lot different the quicker summer approached. I found myself wanting to be alone and pulling away from my old friends – except for Hadley and Jaiden. I wanted to be around her all the time. We had established a little relationship and although it was purely innocent, it felt cool keeping it all a secret. Dylan knew but she was trust worthy.

Other than those three, everyone else seemed to be getting on my nerves. Girls wanted to wear shorter skirts or bikinis to swim class. Mom would kill me if she found me in a short skirt, not that I'd wear one. Everyone was starting to try and fit in somewhere before their twelfth or thirteenth birthday.

I didn't want anything to change.

My home environment even changed. Everything was so different from how it used to be. My parents used up all of their sick days to keep Matthew as comfortable as they could in our home. With them back to work, they were running small interviews for someone to care for him while everyone was at work or school. Day care seemed a little overwhelming for them, I guess.

The main thing that frustrated me was the back and forth of both houses. I wasn't sure when the final decision would be made about who would live where but I didn't feel like leaving my house. The house I practically grew up in; the house that held so many memories in my childhood life.

No one seemed to be listening to what I wanted though. Mom always said we'd talk about it later and Momma said the same thing.

Dylan wasn't as frustrated as I was. She liked the back and forth.

"Can you please just make sure he stops touching my stuff?" I grumbled and started to make my way towards the stairs but she held me back. "I have homework to do."

"I don't know where this attitude is coming from, but I suggest you adjust it a little." Momma said quietly but seriously. "If you want to talk about something, please Luc, feel free, but don't get snappy when we have no clue what's going on inside your head."

I stared at her for a few seconds, watching as concern swept through her eyes. I quickly dismissed it though because I just wasn't in the mood. "Like you care anyway."

"Lucas!" I heard her yell at me while I jumped over the gate and slammed my bedroom door. I waited a few minutes and when I didn't hear any footsteps, I threw myself on the bed.

I was old enough to know I was acting slightly childish. I was old enough to know that I was going through changes as well and didn't want to tell anyone about them. Everything was changing and I had no control over any of it.

I picked up the phone in my bedroom that my parents had agreed I was old enough for, and dialled the number to my favourite person.

"_Be still my beating heart, a little hottie is calling me!"_ Jaiden answered the phone and I grinned, biting my lip. _"Hey Luc."_

"Hi." I twirled the phone cord in my hand and looked out my window, watching as my mom's vehicle pulled up. "Can you come get me?"

I heard a wash of silence come over the other side of the receiver. _"Sure,"_ she sighed a little, _"is everything okay?"_

"No questions Jai." I breathed a little heavy, trying to control my emotions. She made it easy for me to break down because I knew I was safe with her to do so.

"_Okay, well I have to drop Liza off at home but I'll be there in about a half hour, kay? Bring your homework." _

After I thanked her, she hung up and I sat against my headboard. I listened to muffled voices coming from downstairs and heard footsteps coming closer.

I was in big trouble and I knew it.

I braced myself when Mom appeared in my bedroom, quietly closing the door behind her. She gave me a look I couldn't really describe but it wasn't one I liked. I had hurt Momma and in turn, hurt her.

"We need to talk." She sat down on my desk and stared at me with her steel blue eyes. "You're not a baby anymore Lucas. You're more mature than any kid in your school so I know you know right from wrong. I know you know that talking back and slamming doors is not acceptable in this house."

"I was just upset." I played with my comforter. "Matthew should know not to touch what isn't his."

"He's three." Mom gasped and stood up, making her way to me. "When you were three, you hid my gold medals and flushed my favourite earrings down the toilet. I didn't flip out. I brushed it off because I knew you were still learning, you didn't know it was wrong."

"I'm sorry." I sighed.

"I'm not the one you have to apologize too. Ashley is really upset, Lucas. What did she do to deserve this?" Mom had a way of comforting me to a point. I never found her to be hard on us and mainly because we never gave her a reason to be. We listened to the house rules and we respected each other.

When did I change all of that?

"She didn't do anything," I answered truthfully, "I'm just in a bad mood."

"You have been moody for the past few days," she placed a hand on my shoulder gently, "is there anything you want to talk about?"

"No." I moved and turned to face her. "I'll go down and apologize."

Mom nodded and kissed me on the forehead. "I don't want to hear about this again Luc, you know better."

"Yeah." I hurried off the bed and quickly entered the kitchen, where Momma just finished folding the laundry. "Hey," I said quietly.

She glanced at me and put down the towel she folded, before her full attention was on me. "Hey," she smiled slightly.

"I'm sorry." I hopped up on the stool. "I just feel very moody lately and Matthew just kind of made it worse today." At least I was being honest.

"How about this," Momma leaned in closer to me, "how about you promise to keep your valuable stuff in your room and I promise to make sure Matthew isn't anywhere near your stuff. Deal?"

I glanced over at Matthew, who was actually paying close attention to us. I nodded silently and hugged her, kissing her on the cheek. "You didn't deserve my freak out. I know you care."

"Ukus, pay!" Matthew waved a truck in the air before running over to me, placing it in my lap. He smiled and his eyes sparkled, obviously not affected by my entrance earlier.

"Go," Momma nodded and patted my leg, "apology accepted."

I wanted to talk to her about everything else that was floating through my head but I figured she couldn't be bothered.

Jaiden would be picking me up and I could tell her everything.

Maybe she'd have some answers.

--


	108. Separation

_Sorry for the wait in this! Special thanks for my lovely wife for always looking these over for me. And a shout out to Kari, happy belated birthday! Also for Whit, Erin and Trace - thanks for making my facebook a party and a half! lol _

_Thank you to my lovely and loyal readers and reviewers. Without you, this story wouldn't exist. _

_Enjoy!_

**80 - Separation**

**Ashley's PoV**

Over the weekend, things with Lucas seemed to have improved. She spent most of her time with Jaiden after school but she'd come home for dinner in a better mood and was willing to open up just a little bit more.

She had told us she was feeling pressured at school with summer just around the corner. All of the girls in her school were getting more into fashion and she was getting more into her art, which made her a slight loser, according to her female classmates. If I had to be honest, I was surprised she hadn't hit any of them yet.

I was also thankful for that part too. I'd hate to see her grounded and the worst punishment for Lucas would be no 'Jaiden' time.

Spencer and I held interviews for a babysitter while we were at work but when we found out that the good people were scarce, I mentally and physically slapped my head when I thought about day care. Why hadn't we thought about day care? There was one in Spencer's building!

"I can't believe we didn't think of this." Spencer said as she buckled in Matthew in his car seat. Her voice was on the verge of self-annoyance.

"I know." I had to laugh at the situation but before I was quite mad at myself for not thinking of it sooner. We'd wasted a good Saturday morning with no girls and a sleeping boy.

"You think he'll do okay?" Lucas asked in concern as she buckled up her own seatbelt.

"He'll be fine." Spencer smiled at all of us and then tickled his belly. "You're a big boy, aren't you?" She grinned as he giggled.

"Did I go to day care?" Dylan asked, digging through her lunch bag. It was a ritual with her every morning, she had to dig through the bag to see if anything good was in it.

"For a little while." I patted her leg and she gave me a curious look. "When I was working with Aunt Alex, I couldn't always have you in the studio with me. There was a centre three floors below us in the building."

Spencer grinned and looked at Lucas. "You did too. Nana and Grandpa still had to work so we put you in one."

"Yet you forgot about it for Matthew?" Dylan snickered, sarcasm dripping from her voice. The girls were starting to rub off on each other.

"Isn't there a day care where you work, Mom?" Lucas asked as we were all settled into the vehicle, Spencer easing it into reverse.

"Yes, which is where he's going and yes, before you say anything, we're a little stupid for being _that_ forgetful." She bit her lip and started to drive away from the house. I blamed it on how quickly our lives were changing together. We were so caught up in just wanting the best for the kids, a simple thing like that just slipped our minds.

"You said it, not me." Lucas laughed and I heard her give Dylan a high five.

When we pulled up to the girls' school, they were practically out of the door before the vehicle even stopped. They gave us a quick wave and were gone.

"I think I may be a little scared." Spencer admitted with a soft look on her face. "I'm not prepared to have Lucas any older than she already is."

"This is going to sound so cliché but she's going through a normal phase. She's starting to feel peer pressure and we're just reaping the negative benefits." I shrugged and reached over rub her leg with my hand. "You're doing a really great job Spence, don't sell yourself short."

Her blue eyes cast a grateful glance my way and she squeezed the hand that was on her thigh. "I'm so in love with you."

"I'm in love with you." I whispered back, still feeling those chills run through my body when those words escaped our mouths.

Pulling up into Spencer's parking spot at work, we grabbed Matthew and his little backpack. It'd be his first day without us in over a month and I wasn't sure how he'd react. He walked with one of his hands in one of ours, gripping tightly as we swung him gently.

The day care centre was rather spacious. Kids Matthew's age were running around and playing with toys at the other end of the room.

I knelt down to his eye level and dragged my fingers through his curls, which were longer than before. We didn't have the heart to cut them off just yet. "Hey lil guy, are you ready to make new friends?"

He peered around my shoulder and watched the others curiously, clutching his toy truck close to his chest. "Pay?" Matthew raised his eyebrows, pointing in the direction of the toys.

Spencer knelt down beside us and kissed the side of his head. "If you need me, just tell Miss Duncan and she'll come get me, okay?"

Matthew tilted his head slightly before nodding. He barely spoke but when he did, words would start pouring out of his mouth. He only had a hard time pronouncing his 'L's and it was quite adorable.

"Play." I nodded and held his hand as he led me towards the craft table. I smiled knowing he'd seen Lucas a lot with her utensils out.

"I'm going to go find Miss Duncan, I'll be right back." Spencer took off and I sat down in a small chair while Matthew grabbed scrap paper and a crayon.

"Ukus draw picture?" He smiled and started to make random circles in bright red.

"Hi!" A small blonde came bouncing over and looked at Matthew's truck brightly. "Can I see, please?" He asked politely.

Matthew frowned but then pushed his truck towards him and laughed as the little blonde boy started making car noises while driving it on the table.

I turned around and shook my head, looking over towards Spencer, the teacher and another vaguely familiar blonde. "I'll be over there okay?" I said to the little boy but he was having too much fun with his new buddy to even pay attention.

I approached them slowly, just close enough to catch some of the conversation.

"You still look good," the blonde smiled, her eyes scanning Spencer's body up and down slowly. My gaze shifted to Spencer's reaction and she just smiled without meeting the woman's eyes. "So why are you here?"

"Dropping off Matthew Rule," Spencer's answer was directed to Miss Duncan, who was oblivious to the awkward moment between the two blondes. "You?"

At that point Miss Duncan made her way passed me and towards the table where Matthew was at; probably to introduce herself and make him feel comfortable.

"I'm aiding, helping out for a little while." Blues eyes were still lingering a little too long around Spencer's chest area and it made my blood boil just a little. I knew for a fact this woman _knew_ exactly what Spencer looked like underneath all those clothes. "So really, how have you been Spence?"

At that moment, Spencer's head finally turned towards me and a smile appeared on her face. "I've been great." She waved me over and I slid one hand around her waist, pulling her lightly against me. "Aimee, you remember Ashley right?"

"Vaguely." Aimee responded, her eyes only catching mine briefly. "So I see you've finally settled."

Spencer looked around the room full of children and shook her head. "Not here."

I was guessing Aimee was one for causing a scene because Spencer immediately pulled us out into the lobby and squared her jaw at the blonde. "Yes Aimee, I've settled."

"Good." Aimee looked at me and smiled sadly. "You've got yourself one beautiful woman."

"I know." I nodded and squeezed Spencer, smiling at her.

"Well, Matthew will be in great care, I promise." She turned to leave, which shocked Spencer, but turned around and licked her lips. "I really thought you were more for me Spencer, but I'm really happy for you."

"Aim," Spencer grabbed her arm gently and tucked hair behind the blonde's ear, "there was only you, okay? When we were 'together', I promise it was only you."

The smile that formed on Aimee's face was blinding. "Thank you, but you don't have to say that."

"It's true." Spencer bit her lip and dropped her hand from Aimee's face.

Aimee nodded and moved backwards. "That means a lot Spencer. See you two around." I could tell it made her day better knowing that she wasn't being played, even though there were ground rules according to Spencer.

Spencer watched her walk away until she was out of sight and then glanced at me with a guilty look.

"I'm not mad." I whispered honestly and kissed her cheek. "I think that took a lot of courage for you to admit that."

"Yeah?" She gave me a worried look.

I shrugged a little and laced my fingers with hers. "Aimee's really sweet isn't she?"

"Yeah." Spencer smiled a little. "She was different. The fact remains though that I wasn't looking for anything serious."

"Well for Aimee to know that it was just her being with you, it must've left her some peace." I pulled her closer to me, cupping her cheek. "I know you're mine. I have no worries or jealous insecurities," I tugged her towards the door, "come on, let's go wish Matthew a good day and get our asses to work."

Matthew was content wish his new friends and waved us bye with a huge smile.

"So I'll pick you and Matthew up after work." I walked Spencer to her side of the building. "I'll call the school and let the girls know we'll be a tad late in picking them up."

Spencer nodded and wrapped her arms around my neck. "You know," she whispered, her blue eyes scanning mine, "I can't wait to become Mrs. Davies."

I grinned and pressed my forehead against her, our eyes still connected. "I can't wait either baby."

--

**Spencer's PoV**

I glanced up at the clock and realized it was lunch time. I put some files away before making my way to the front to see if Ryn was busy.

To my surprise when I reached the front, I recognized the short bald man standing at the desk, laughing with Ryn. I approached them slowly, my eyebrows frowning but I immediately forced myself to smile when his brown eyes connected with mine. "Miss Carlin, how are you?" He held out his hand and I shook it, nodding at him politely.

"Good afternoon Mr. Shapiro, what brings you to our side of the province?"

Mr. George Shapiro was the head boss of Child Development Services in all of Ontario. He overlooked many developments like mine and even though my father and I started up the place, Mr. Shapiro was still in charge when all was said and done.

"I'm sure you got my email." He looked at me curiously and I shrugged.

"No, I didn't. It must've gone into my spam mail. You know how it is." I smiled apologetically. "But let me tell you, it's a pleasant surprise seeing you here."

"As long as it's all pleasantries, Miss Carlin." Mr. Shapiro grinned and turned to talk to Ryn, "I'll come back and check things out. I'm going to take a walk with Miss Carlin here."

Ryn nodded and her eyes found mine, almost in sympathy. Mr. Shapiro was a nice man but sometimes a little too overly.

"Please, call me Spencer." I followed him out of the office and into the building lobby where he looked towards the direction of the day care centre.

"I understand that you've fostered another child." He led me towards the door and opened it, allowing me to walk down the hallway. We stopped outside of the day care and I glanced through the glass doors to see the kids sitting in their seats eating lunch. Matthew looked happy with his chocolate pudding cup Ashley packed for him.

"The little boy in the blue shirt." I pointed to him and smiled, feeling a little tug at my own heart.

"You're a very thoughtful woman Spencer. This development is lucky to have you not only be a big part of its running, but to be involved with taking these children in your care until their needs are further met." Mr. Shapiro adjusted his glasses and folded his hands together in front of him, studying me. "Which brings me to why I'm here."

I glanced at him a tad nervously. I figured if anything, my dad could've given me a heads up that the guy was going to make an appearance.

"This young boy you're taking care of," he paused briefly, "does he have someone else taking care of him as well?"

"Are you asking me if I'm involved with someone?" I raised an eyebrow, slightly confused by the question.

"I'd need to know if there's someone there to take care of him while you're in Toronto for a an Annual Directors of Board meeting." His voice remained calmed, as if he didn't think I'd act out at the sudden change of events.

"What?!" I hissed and shook my head. "No, I'm sorry but I can't go."

"It's not a question Miss Carlin. As your duty to this development, you're required to be there. We're holding meetings all week regarding changes in departments and I can't have anyone stand in for you, seeing as this place is run under your care." Mr. Shapiro shrugged and sighed.

"I have a family here. I can't just pick up and leave for a whole week." I shook my head at his absurdity.

"We all have families." Was his only reply.

Ashley wasn't going to like this new bit of information; neither were the girls or Matthew. I scratched my forehead and glanced back in the room where the little boy was still engrossed in his lunch. "I have a fiancée taking care of Matthew with me" I bit my lip and shook my head again while looking at the bald guy, "I still think this is wrong, they're not going to like this."

"My wife hated the fact that I'll be gone for a week visiting each development and I'll be gone for another week going to the meetings." His eyes showed a sense of sadness behind them. "That is life Spencer; we have responsibilities to live up too. I'll be honest with you though, I'm really excited to have your presence there with us. No one will be able to tell the Board what things would work for changes and things that won't. Running this centre here in a smaller town gives you more of a feel for what the kids really need. Your input will be needed to the bigger cities to understand how they too can run such a smooth development."

Well when he put it like that, I had to admit I felt a little pride go through me. I worked hard and I always felt like I was a little under appreciated.

"When do I leave?" I asked, defeated. There was no way I could talk myself out of that one.

"We have a flight booked for you for Sunday evening. You'll be staying at the Four Seasons Hotel where we'll be having the meetings during that week. All expense paid and your return will be for next Saturday." Mr. Shapiro reached in his coat and handed me a plane ticket along with a business credit card. "If you use the card for anything other than food or drinks, you will be billed."

I just nodded, looking at the items he handed to me.

"I'm really sorry for coming by like this. I guess if you would've gotten that email, you would've been more prepared." He laughed softly and patted me on the arm before clearing his throat. "Please tell your fiancée that he's one lucky guy to have a strong willed woman like yourself."

I blinked and frowned before a smile broke out. It had been a long while since someone made that mistake. "Oh George, I'll be sure to tell _her_ that."

His eyes widened slightly before he chuckled. "Of course, forgive me. Tell your fiancée that _she's_ lucky."

With that, our pleasantries dwindled off and he went back to Ryn to snoop at our records no doubt.

I glanced down at the round trip airfare and golden credit card in my hand. "Well this sucks."

--


	109. Move Along

_Sorry for this LONG delay! I'm back... again! My wife is a witness, I have a little more written (and one last tiny shocker) for you all. I just need to piece it all together now seeing as I've made a few ending changes. The chapter lengths will vary until we get to the end so please keep that in mind!_

_Thank you for your patience, I love it! I hope this chapter brings a smile to your face. Enjoy!_

**81.1 - Move Along**

**Ashley's PoV**

The atmosphere was quiet when we arrived home. The girls rushed upstairs to do their homework and Matthew sat on the living room floor playing with his toy trucks.

Spencer put the kettle on the element and grabbed two mugs from the cupboard. I studied her movement and I could tell something was on her mind. "Everything okay?"

Spencer glanced at me with an apologetic smile and nodded then paused before shrugging. "Mr. Shapiro was in town today."

Mr. Shapiro was someone Spencer didn't like to mention unless she really had to. By the look she was giving me at that moment, it wasn't a pleasant visit. "You didn't know he was coming?"

She snorted and leaned over the counter, her forehead pressed against mine. "Apparently there was an email sent but I didn't get it. He came bearing some news that was both good and bad."

"Does this have to do with Matthew?" I whispered and she quickly shook her head. It was unspoken but neither Spencer nor I were looking into good homes for him... I think I'd be devastated if Matthew left the family.

I could now say I understood just how hard it was for Spencer to welcome these kids in her home only to know they'd be leaving again. Matthew seemed happy where he was and we knew that the girls had no problems, just as long as Lucas kept her valuables in her room.

"Why the long face?" I stroked her cheek softly and she just closed her eyes, smiling lightly.

"The good news is I'm worthy enough to be amongst the Board of Directors for a weeklong meeting," blonde hair fell over her eyes and I tucked them away, "bad news is I have to be at that meeting next week."

"Okay," I gave her an encouraging smile and tilted my head to the side, "why is that bad news?"

"It's in Toronto." Spencer breathed and moved to the stove, taking the whistling kettle off the element. "I leave on Sunday and I'll be back Saturday."

"Oh." I frowned, instantly not liking the idea. "I'm guessing there's no way around it, eh?"

"Not really. It sounds like a big deal. They're making some changes and he thinks it'd be beneficial if I were there to express just how great things run here. He's hoping I can bring some ideas to the table to allow the larger city departments to be just as successful as small town ones." Spencer carefully passed me my cup of tea and sat across from me at the breakfast bar.

Of course I'd be sad that my girl would be gone for a week and I'd miss her like crazy but the business opportunity was important. Before me, before I entered the picture again, Spencer strived to get where she was with her career. I wasn't about to let me stop her from succeeding and getting further with her accomplishments.

"Well I'm going to miss you and as much as I'd like to throw a pity fit and beg you to find a way out of it, I think this is a great opportunity Spence." I grabbed her hand from across the counter and squeezed it. "Believe me, I'm not happy about spending a whole week away from you."

Spencer bit her lip and smiled softly, making her way to my side of the counter and plopped herself on my lap. "You're amazing, you know that? Here I want to kick and scream because I don't want to be the one leaving and you're being all responsible."

"It's all part of growing up." I winked and brought my lips up to kiss her gently. I held her tightly against me as the kiss continued slowly and lovingly.

"Um, not in front of the boy?" Lucas cleared her throat and grinned when Spencer and I broke apart. "I just wanted you to look over my homework," she placed her notebook in front of us and continued to grab an apple from the fridge.

Spencer glanced over the neat writing of our oldest daughter and smiled. "This isn't homework," she said slowly.

"It's an apology letter." Lucas blushed. "I know I've been kind of mean lately and I'm sorry. Sometimes it's easier to write it down than explain it all so there you have it."

Spencer got off my lap and pulled Lucas in a tight hug, kneeling down slightly. "I get it baby girl, I've been there. It's confusing going through changes at your age. I'm just happy that you can come to us when you're ready, and talk to us about it."

"Jaid's been awesome." Lucas smiled and blushed a little. "I don't mean to be telling her things first but-"

"No need to explain." I interrupted softly and she gave me a hug, her arm wrapped around me loosely as she pulled out of the embrace.

"Ukas!" Matthew glanced up and noticed the older blonde hanging off of me. "Mine." He pouted and made his way over to my leg, hanging off of it. "Right?" He glanced up at me and my heart melted yet again.

"Matthew," Lucas picked up him effortlessly and he flung his arms around her neck, laughing, "Momma's ours, kay? We share her."

Matthew's eyes connected with mine. "Momma."

Spencer nearly spit out her tea and widened her eyes.

I nearly felt my heart drop to the floor.

"Yes, Momma." Lucas beamed proudly and squeezed his small body. "Dylan!" She hollered and footsteps came bounding down the stairs. "Matthew just called Momma, Momma!"

"Aww!" Dylan cooed and reached for the boy. He was a little big for her to carry but she hugged the life out of him once Lucas set him on the floor again.

Spencer leaned forward and kissed me again with a soft smile. She pulled back as we watched the three kids get along like they normally do.

Matthew loved being center of attention and he was soaking it in with the girls.

"When should we tell him I'm leaving Sunday?" Spencer whispered, making her way behind me and resting her chin on my shoulder.

"Later," I sighed and leaned back into her, "I wanna enjoy this moment."

"Me too," she whispered and kissed me right below my ear, "Momma." She grinned and pulled me tighter against her.

--

The girls didn't take to Spencer leaving so well. Turned out Lucas really never spent that much time away from her mom and I couldn't blame her for being a little more than upset. She didn't cry in the open but I heard her a few times in her room. She finally came to me the night after Spencer left and confessed she was just so scared that she'd lose her for good.

I had the same fear but I knew Spencer would be as safe as she could be.

Spencer made sure to call every single night and talked to each of us at least once. Matthew would talk about his finger paintings, Lucas would talk about her hockey camp in the summer and Dylan would talk about homework. I'd talk about my day and ask her about hers but it wasn't until after the kids went to sleep that she'd call me back and get her sex voice on.

Sometimes those things would bring me back to high school.

It was Wednesday afternoon when I had picked the girls up from school and Matthew from day care.

"Can Jason come over this weekend?" Dylan asked as soon as she got into the Blazer.

"I don't see why not." I smiled and waited for them to buckle in.

"Can I go to Jaiden's?" Lucas asked from the front seat and smiled at me.

"I don't see why not." I repeated with a grin and looked back at Matthew, "is there anything you'd like to do little man?"

It looked like he was thinking about it and then smiled. "I want movies."

"Movies it is." I laughed and pulled out of the parking lot and headed towards Rapture.

"You're doing a really good job Momma." Lucas smiled and patted my hand that was on the gear shift. "I'm lucky to have you as my other parent."

"Thanks Luc." I blushed a little.

"No, I'm lucky to have Mom as my other parent. Grandpa was nice enough to let me live here, right Momma?" Dylan spoke from the back seat.

"Right." I nodded and the small conversation continued until we arrived at our destination.

Reaching the entrance, I grabbed Matthew's tiny hand and opened the door.

"Aww it's my favourite family." Chase welcomed us and picked up Matthew, squeezing him. "You're just so darn cute!" She kissed his cheek as he giggled and tried to push her face away.

"Aww it's the man of the hour!" Jaiden cooed from behind her mother and pinched his cheek softly before glancing at the booth, to find Lucas and Dylan already reading the menu. "And it's my main squeeze." She grinned and slid into the booth beside Lucas.

"Can I read?" Matthew asked, pointing towards the reading area. "Pease?"

"I know what I want already," Dylan smiled at us and took Matthew by the hand, "we'll go read until the food comes."

I smiled gratefully at my daughter and nodded for them to go quietly. Chase grabbed our orders quickly before taking off in the back again.

"How was school?" I asked Lucas as she played with the bracelet on Jaiden's wrist.

"Good." Her grey eyes looked up at me and grinned. "I aced our spelling test."

"You always ace the spelling tests." Jaiden grinned, nudging her slightly. "I aced my music test, didn't I _Miss_ Davies?"

"Momma, when I go to Beaver Brae, do I have to call you Miss Davies?" Lucas frowned slightly and I smirked a little.

"Probably." I nodded in her direction before glancing at the teenager across from me. "You did pretty good Jai."

"That's it? 'You did pretty good Jai'? Can you be any more vague?" She pouted and glanced at her watch. "Hey do you think it'd be okay if I stole this one here with me later?" She patted Lucas' head lightly.

I raised an eyebrow. "Why?"

"We have a hot date." Jaiden winked and got up from where she was sitting. "I'll pick her up after my shift, is that cool?"

Lucas grinned and looked down at her menu, biting her lip when I told them that was fine. "Thanks," she shrugged, "I know you and mom must think that I'm always trying to get away from you."

"Not at all." I sighed with a smile. "Just promise me you'll get your homework done? If your mother comes back to your grades slipping within these next few days, I'm toast."

Lucas laughed, shaking her head. "Won't be a problem, I promise. Jaiden doesn't let me do anything until both of our homework is done anyway." She rolled her eyes and sipped on the coke in front of her.

"Luc," I grabbed her attention and she tilted her head just like Spencer, "do you think you can help me with something?"

"I helped you out with a proposal dude, I can do anything." Her eyes sparkled and she leaned forward, waiting for what I had to say.

I was happy Dylan and Matthew ended up joining us with a couple of books and made themselves comfortable in the booth.

"Well I think it's time we all officially live under the same roof, don't you think?" I smiled as Dylan's head snapped up to meet Lucas'. "So I need you girls to help keep an eye on Matthew with Jaiden Saturday morning so I can get all of my stuff moved into the house."

A couple of high pitched squeals came from where we were sitting as the girls jumped up and down, hugging a baffled Matthew in the process. "Really?" Lucas couldn't wipe the grin off her face.

"Yeah, besides I kind of like the house your mom bought better. It's warmer and definitely more spaced for the five of us, don't you think?" I ran my fingers through Matthew's curls and he nodded, still looking a little confused yet happy by all the commotion.

"Does mom know?" Dylan asked wide eyed.

"No, so when she gets home Saturday night, she'll be coming home to a full house and I bet she's going to love the surprise." I laughed as they jumped up and down.

"What's all the fuss about?" Chase smiled as she made her way over with our orders.

"Oh well we're going to be moving into Spencer's place permanently Saturday." I hummed happily.

--

**Dylan's PoV**

"La la la." I sang slowly as Matthew scrunched up his face and stared at me curiously. "Come on Matthew, you can sing it."

"Ah!" He grinned and clapped his hands, dancing around before I grabbed him and sat him back down on the couch.

"L-l-l-a." I sang again and he huffed. "You can do it, just put your tongue like this, watch." I placed my tongue to the roof of my mouth and waited until he copied me. "La." I did it quickly and stared at him while he made a few faces.

"La." He didn't seem fazed by his accomplishments. I had been trying to help him say his 'L's and until today, I hadn't been successful.

"Matthew! You did it!" I hugged him and grinned when he wrapped his smaller arms around me.

"La la la la!" He laughed and clapped his hands, finally realizing what he had just said.

"Can you say _L_ucas?"

He thought about it real hard before placing his tongue to the roof of his mouth and frowned in concentration. "L-lucas!"

I squealed and grabbed his hand. "Momma!" I found her in my bedroom packing up all my trinkets that will be moved over to the other house. "Momma, listen!"

Momma glanced between the two of us and stopped what she was doing before sitting on the bed with an amused smile on her face.

"Ready Matthew?" I grinned and he nodded, almost doing a dance while standing still. "Say Lucas."

Again he concentrated before stuttering the name slightly. "L-lucas!"

Momma's eyes lit up and she clapped. "My little man!" She gave him a high five while he continued to say the name over and over again. "Did you teach him that?"

"I did." I beamed proudly. "I kind of got tired of him calling me Dian instead of Dylan." I blushed and it made her laugh harder, pulling us both into a hug.

"I'm so proud of you baby Dyl." She kissed my cheek before ruffling Matthew's curls. "Can you say Dylan?"

Matthew looked at me with a curious look and I demonstrated how I'd say my name.

"Dylan." He bit his lip shyly before being scooped up in Momma's arms while the three of us danced around in my soon to be old bedroom.

"Your mom is going to love this." Momma grinned and kissed his cheek. "How about you two continue to practice while I finish up here. We should be getting back to the other house before Jaiden drops Lucas off."

"Come on Matthew, let's go see what other words I can teach you." He eagerly wrapped his hand around mine and held on tight.

I was getting used to feeling like an older sister. Matthew seemed to love hanging around me and I enjoyed his company, plus he had pretty cool toys to play with.

I wondered when Momma adopted Lucas if she would adopt Matthew as well?

--


	110. Girl Talk

_Hi! I've been away for quite some time and I admit I was attacked by a major writer's block. It's one of those things where you know where and how the story's going to end but you just need to point out the finer details to get there. I've had so many ideas attacking me but I decided exactly how I want this to go and it should be smooth sailing from here on out! _

_Note: This chapter is void of ANY Spashley. You don't need to read it if you don't want too but some points are valid, especially for the third installment I'm about to embark on. I'd read it anyway! :)_

_Thank you all for your kind support and patience. -heart-_

_Enjoy this exceptionally short filler. :)_

**81.2 - Girl Talk**

**Sammy's PoV**

"_**Rock star Alex Carlin will be performing on next week's debut of RJ Live. RJ Live is a new entertainment source that will be chalked full of live music, interviews with today's hottest celebs and your one stop shop to everything musical. **_

_**Alex, who just finishing the last leg of her world tour, will be signing autographs after the show. **_

_**RJ, New York City's most wanted DJ selected to host the new show RJ Live, has recently said that she couldn't think of a better artist to have kick off her show than the Canadian sensation. **_

_**Tickets have been sold out for quite some time but if you want to get your hands on one, it's not too late! If you're a fan of music, live entertainment and Alex Carlin please visit our website on details of how you can win the last few tickets here at our studio."**_

"She's sure making a comeback." Carmen smiled and got up from the couch in my small studio apartment.

"Yeah." I smiled a little and turned off the TV. "Ever since she's returned to North America, she's been in every magazine. She definitely redefined herself."

"I think she just found herself again." Carmen glanced at me with a small smile. "I've watched a few interviews with her and she seems really happy Sam, that's awesome."

I nodded and followed Carmen into the small kitchenette. "Aren't you going to be in New York next week?"

Carmen cast me a side glance before opening the fridge. "Did you want to come crash at my hotel to go see your ex girlfriend?" She asked while grabbing a beer and tossing me one.

"No." I laughed and shrugged. "Alex made it very clear that she's not ready for any of that yet, especially not with me."

Carmen chuckled and tossed her beer back before smacking her lips together. "Okay so you don't want to go see her but you want me to?"

"No." I shook my head and followed her back to the couch, plopping down on it with my legs thrown over the back, my head nearly hanging off the edge.

"Come on babe, you're obvious. You've always been obvious it came to your feelings and Alex." Carmen positioned herself to face me.

"I suck." I mumbled and she crawled over my body, lowering herself down onto it.

"You're a victim of love. You don't suck." She whispered and kissed my neck lightly. "And I know your heart doesn't belong to me," she pulled me up and I settled on her lap, "but I'm selfish. You're sexy as fuck and I want you."

"I shouldn't even be doing this with you anymore Carmen," I groaned with guilt as she traced the small of my back with her fingertips. "We broke up weeks ago."

"Booty calls are my specialty." She said calmly and claimed my lips gently before pulling back. "I don't see the harm in finding peace and lust within each other until we find our way."

Carmen always had a way with words. The break up was more than mutual and definitely ended on good terms. We were both just so lonely that the break up happened to come with a few long hot nights along the side.

"You know," Carmen sighed when I slid off her lap and turned to face her, "this whole thing just made me realize that I'm really not cut out for being in a long term relationship. You gave me a run for my money though Sam." She smiled softly and ran her finger down my cheek before picking up her beer and taking another sip.

I gave her a quick kiss on the cheek and stood up after slamming my beer back. "I'm heading to bed," I paused and motioned her to follow me.

I wasn't ashamed of myself for being with Carmen in a sexual way. We had to admit that was over half of our relationship. The sex was unbelievable and yes, she was sweet and thoughtful and highly romantic, but in the end that all led up to sex.

Thank you, sex.

I miss you, sex.

I'm bored right now so let's go have sex, sex!

Carmen loved sex.

Tucking herself in on her side of the bed, she poked me slightly in the ribs. "I love you Sam, you know that right?"

I turned to face her and propped myself up on my elbow. "I know and you know the feeling's mutual."

"When Alex does come around and she does come to her senses, you two are going to be so inseparable." I could see her smiling softly, her eyes sparkling in the dark. "But damn Taylor, I'm going to miss your fine ass in my bed."

I smirked and kissed her lightly on the lips. "Good night Carm."

--

**Jaiden's PoV**

"What's with all the depressing music lately?" Lucas asked from my desk. She scrolled through my music and then looked back at me on the bed.

I shrugged, biting the edge of my pencil. "Just feeling it."

"Oh," she frowned before swinging the chair around so she was facing me completely, "why? Am I whining about my parents too much?"

I laughed softly and sat up, closing my math book. "No Luc, you've been a wonderful distraction. Besides, I'm happy that you're spending all of your free time with me."

"Yeah?" She grinned and crossed her legs. "Well you'll be happy to know that I have nothing to complain about today. Except for the fact that I miss my mom."

"Aw, she'll be back tomorrow evening. I think she's missing you guys just as much, if not more. She has four people to miss, you have the one." I smiled softly. "She's going to be really surprised to know that everything Ashley owns is stuffed in your basement."

Lucas laughed. "It's just until they can figure out where to put the rest of her things. Dylan already has a bed and Matthew doesn't need a big bed yet. I think it's really cool that the people who are renting from Momma aren't making a big deal out of not painting over my bedroom wall."

"I'd be so laying the smack down if they so much as scratch that wall up." I said seriously and it caused her to laugh again. "So our birthdays are coming up, what do you think we should do?"

She thought about it for a moment and then shrugged. "Not sure. What's it like turning twelve?"

"You'll definitely feel older," I winked and threw a pillow at her, "but it's also kind of a big deal; especially since you'll be a grade six senior."

"I think I just want to have a movie day. With my family, you and Hadley." Lucas nodded firmly, like she already had her mind made up.

"Really?" I raised an eyebrow. "You're not gonna milk a party for all it's worth?"

"Nah." She shook her head. "Maybe Had can sleep over but that's about it."

I smirked a little. Her 'girlfriend' Hadley had been pretty high on her conversation list. I had the privilege of taking them to a movie or two while sitting a few rows back with Eliza.

"Wish I could have Lize sleep over on my birthday." I mumbled and ran a hand through my hair. I caught her grinning at me. "What?"

"That's the first time you've mentioned her in over a week." Lucas said lightly. "Are you two okay?"

Eliza was having issues with her parents. They were starting to become more forceful and stricter when it came to her spending time with me. Turned out they realized I wasn't just an experiment for their daughter when news reached them that there was an ex girlfriend in their daughter's past.

I'd see her at school and there'd be times when she was so loving and wanting to cuddle but then there were moments when if I touched her, she'd act like I was burning her. I was getting a little tired of the push away trips she was putting me through but I cared so much that I held onto hope that maybe she'll just let me be there for her.

"Her parents don't like me, they don't like my parents and they don't like yours." I stated honestly. I've never held back from Lucas, she was far more advanced in her age then most kids I went to school with.

"Because we like girls?" She batted her eyes innocently before sprawling out on her stomach next to me. "I'm sorry."

"Don't be," I sighed and closed my eyes, "you're not the one forbidding me to see her."

"Liza will come around, she likes you a lot." Lucas assured me with a famous Carlin head tilt. "Hey Jai, are you going away in August for school?"

"Probably, though I'm not sure where. I was thinking U of M, stay within two hours of here so I can come crying to you when the next girl breaks my heart." I nudged her a bit with a grin.

"I'll kick their asses." Lucas sat up with a serious look on her face.

"So should you pay me for swearing?" I teased and she giggled. "Fine, I'll give you a freebee but don't you start letting that potty mouth get out of control around your parents."

"Got it!" She saluted and went back to the computer. "You promise if you do go away somewhere far, you'll write to me every day?"

"I'll call you every single night." I got up and kissed her forehead. "Trust me Lucas, you're the only real friend I have and I wouldn't screw that up, ever."

--


	111. The Missing Piece

_My apologies for the delay! I know you're all patient with waiting however I'm giving a nice shout out to **Louise & Nhiza!** Thank you** :)**_

_I don't own SoN._

_Enjoy!_

**82.1 – The Missing Piece**

**Spencer's PoV**

The week was hell for me, the meetings were way too long and I missed my family. Luckily enough though, the board was looking into better and improved ideas of how to run a successful children's development in bigger cities.

I was able to spend most of my time with my dad though, seeing as he was a part of the Board of Directors. Kyla had slipped away from Midtown to visit me in the city, leaving Aiden with the kids for a couple of days.

"I can't believe you're leaving already!" Kyla whined as she helped me pack my suitcase. "It feels like you just got here."

"I know and I'd love to stay but I'm going out of my mind without Ashley and the kids at my side." I replied honestly, sighing sadly.

"Oh my God, Matthew looks so adorable." Kyla gushed for the millionth time over the photos I had of the girls and Matthew together in my wallet. "Is he a keeper?"

I glanced at her and bit my lip. "I promised I'd find him a really great home."

"And you did." Kyla smiled and winked.

"Ashley and I haven't talked about it but," I paused and picked at the sweater that was in my hands, "I wouldn't be opposed to the topic of adoption."

Kyla shrieked and wrapped her arms around me. "You guys are so freaking meant to be. I swear if I wasn't so self absorbed and trying to keep Aiden a secret back in high school, I would've caught on eventually."

"I still can't believe you slept with the guy I was seeing." I pulled a face and she smacked me on the arm. "What? I know it was a long time ago blah blah. But still Ky, scraping my left over's?"

"Ha ha." She responded dryly. "When did you and Ash start seeing each other anyway?"

I smirked. "Remember that one day, I had a double header with the team and I was meeting everyone for breakfast before the games started?" She nodded, listening intently, "well remember when no one could find Ashley and you came looking for me in the locker room?"

"Uh huh..." Kyla raised an eyebrow.

"Well I had you get Alex for a reason that morning. She kind of knew about us and at that moment, Ashley was naked in the shower with me." If it were twelve years ago and I was relaying this information to Kyla, I'd be nervous as hell but at that moment I couldn't help but carry a smug and satisfied smile.

"Oh." Kyla nodded before her eyes went wide. "Oh my God!!"

I laughed and threw an article of clothing at her. "What, you asked."

"No! I didn't ask when you two had sex for the first time." She stuck her tongue before wiping her face with her hands. She was probably wiping the naughty visuals out of her head. "Really though? Your first time was in the arena's shower stall?"

"Hot, Kyla. It was so fucking hot and good." I reminded her.

"Okay yea, ew." Kyla laughed and stuffed my suitcase with more clothes. "When did you guys become involved romantically?"

"About a month after she moved in with Aiden. I was helping her with a paper and then before I knew it, my lips were sealed to hers. Things heated up pretty quickly, both sexually and romantically. For a while there she ignored me because she realized that she was messing around with her cousin's girl but then she was at my door one night, telling me she was in love with me. We snuck around for a little while until I just couldn't lead Aiden on like that anymore." I smiled at the fond memories of our teenaged years.

"Aww." Kyla sniffled and pulled me into a hug. "I used to wonder if Aiden was only with me because he knocked me up but he's the sweetest husband and a perfect dad. So thank you for breaking up with him."

I laughed and nodded. "Anytime."

"So the big day, it's just around the corner!" She let me go and grabbed a bridal magazine that she had brought with her. "I was thinking that maybe we should really take this planning thing seriously because you've hardly said a word about it lately. You're not getting cold feet, are you?"

"Yeah right." I snorted. "I can't wait for the day when I can legally sign my name 'Spencer D. Davies'."

"Good. Does Ashley know where she wants it yet?"

"No, but we've talked about a few places. Since Tracey and Alex aren't going to be married, we could take their opening at the court yard by the lake." I suggested and pictured it. My luck though, it'd rain so we had to have a backup plan.

"Well I'll talk to her about that then. In the mean time, we have to start looking into all the finer details of this wedding. Your dress, my dress...oh I can't wait!" I swear if Kyla could have a wedding every single year, she would. Ever since we were little she'd plan up dream weddings and vacations. I felt sorry for Cailyn when she found herself a good young man to marry. Kyla would be like the mother of the bride-to-be from hell.

"Let me finish packing and then we can get all crazy with the planning until I have to go catch my flight." I laughed and she happily complied.

Over six hours later I was stepping off the plane and heading towards the luggage claim. It had been a rather short and smooth flight but I was anxious to make the two hour car ride home so I could be reunited with my family.

A week may not be that long but it was long enough. After being away from Ashley for twelve years, I didn't want to spend another day without her by my side. Lucas had never been away from me since after my knee injury in hockey so I knew she was taking it hard too. I was just happy she had family and Jaiden to keep her occupied until I came back home.

I grabbed my luggage off the belt and before I knew it, I found myself swept up from behind, my body crushed into a familiar form. My heart pounded and when I turned around I was met with warm chocolate eyes burning into my soul and a smile melted me from the inside. "Ashley!"

Ashley gave me her famous nose crinkle grin and cupped the side of my face before taking my lips into her own. The kiss was so passionate and igniting that we could've lit the whole airport on fire. I knew there were people around us, some drooling, some giving us mocking glares, but I didn't care. All I cared about was the woman in my arms, taking my breath away.

"God baby, I missed you." Ashley whispered against my lips before kissing me over and over again.

I wasn't sure how long time had passed us but soon we were making our way to the car. "Where are the kids?" I asked, my head still reeling from my 'welcome home' kiss.

"Jaiden has the girls and Ryn has Matthew. I know you were going to rent a car to drive home but I couldn't resist surprising you." Ashley smiled and squeezed my hand. "How was your trip?"

I threw my luggage into the trunk of her mustang and sighed, rolling my head a bit. "Long, boring and lonely. Kyla managed to raid my mini fridge for a couple of days though. Which reminds me, she's calling you later on about details of where you want the wedding."

Ashley shook her head with a smile. "I'll tell her to let me worry about the destination. You girls just work on the dresses and other bridal details, okay?"

I swooned and kissed her cheek. "I'm so happy you drove here to get me."

"I called your mom, she told me you were at the airport already in Toronto. I figured I had enough time to come sweep you off your feet. This mustang makes a two hour drive feel like nothing!" Ashley squeezed my hand.

"So the kids were good for you?" I asked as she made her way out of the airport parking lot.

"The best." She nodded with a proud smile. "Lucas helped out a lot. She helped Dyl with her homework, she helped me with feeding Matthew and she didn't yell or throw a pre-teen hissy fit once. I think whatever Jaiden's been saying to her is helping out a great deal."

"Jaiden knows how to handle her, she always has. It's like this undeniable connection those two have and you can't break it at all. When Luc and I first moved here, she attached herself to ten year old Jaiden and never let go." I laughed and sighed.

"Matthew can officially say his 'L's now though. Dylan spent the entire week of her free time talking to him." Ashley beamed. "Those two hit it off quite well."

We made small talk all the way back to Kenora and the sun had already set by the time we reached the house. The lights were off and I raised an eyebrow. "I thought you said Ryn had Matthew?"

"Oh she does," Ashley nodded and grabbed my suitcase from the trunk before closing it, "at her place."

I frowned but she just grabbed my hand and dragged me towards the house. We flicked on the lights and I raised an eyebrow at my surroundings. Ashley's favourite recliner was sitting in the middle of the living room. Extra coats and shoes were placed by the door in a tidy manner. Ashley's favourite coffee mug that she kept at her place was sitting on the kitchen table.

"What?" I turned around to face her and she just gave me a big smile.

"Surprise!" She threw her arms around me and nuzzled my neck, placing a soft kiss there. "You said whenever I was ready to make a decision on the move that everything would be dropped and we'd do it. So I had Chase and Ephiny help me this past week and here we are," she inhaled deeply before pressing her lips to my ear, "home sweet home."

I gasped before grinning like a fool. "Do you even realize how perfect you are?" I squealed like a high school cheerleader and hugged her tighter. "Wait," I frowned and pushed her back slightly, "what about your house? You put so much hard work into that, especially with the girls' rooms."

"I wouldn't worry about that. I'm renting it out to a new little family. They're both lawyers and have a 4 year old son. They're also expecting in a few months so they'll be using Lucas' room as the nursery. We've signed agreements saying if there's any damage done then, well, they'll be paying for it." Ashley beamed proudly and shrugged. "I don't want to let that house go so I thought maybe we'd rent it out until the girls are old enough to be on their own or maybe Jaiden."

"Aww," I grinned and nuzzled her nose with mine, pulling her into a short soft kiss. "So when are we expecting the kids home?"

Ashley pulled back and closed her eyes briefly before opening them up and showing a darker shade of brown. She blinked slowly before biting her lip and glancing back at the clock above the fireplace mantel. "An hour, maybe two." She bit her lip and grinned before her hand slid around my waist and pulled me tight against her. "I think you wanna come with me and check out the bedroom."

"Oh yeah?" I teased and nipped at her bottom lip lightly. "Did you change it around?"

Ashley ignored me and tugged me up the stairs. The bedroom door opened and I found it pretty much the same as when I left.

"What's different about it?" I asked, slightly confused.

Ashley let out a husky chuckle and shut the door behind her, making sure it was locked. I raised an eyebrow at her and she just shook her head and pushed me back on the bed. My ass hit the mattress and I glanced up at her shocked. "There's been one thing missing in here all week," she whispered and tugged her plain white hoodie over her head, throwing it across the room. I found my lap topped by a topless brunette and her lips were right next to my ear. "You wanna know what that missing piece is?"

I swallowed and clutched at her warm, lithe hips, squeezing my eyes shut. "Ash," I hissed when she tugged on my earlobe with her teeth.

"You, naked and flat on your back." Ashley growled softly and pushed me over, quickly getting to work at disrobing me.

Fuck. Yes.

Maybe I should leave out of town more often if this is the welcome home treatment I get.

--


	112. On Location

**_Ahh! Okay, so it took me a long freakin' time, as per usual. I'm sorry! I blame myself. I had a whole two weeks of taking things easy and I blew it. I can also easily blame two certain people that sucked me in MW2, but I won't. Anyway, as promised, this is an Alex centric update with a small dash of Spashley. No worries, Spashley will prevail! (Duh.) So, this update is in honour of five of the best ladies I know. Thank you for your help in this chapter, you know who you are! And to __Khaye__, because I promised you a chapter and this one is yours. : )_**

**_Enjoy! I will return with more soon! _**

**82.2 – On Location**

**Alex's PoV**

New York City was probably one my favourite cities to visit. The crowds were always welcoming and there's always so much to see. I could explore the whole day and still find new things to discover.

Sadly I didn't have time to really explore while I stayed. I was booked with autograph sessions, press conferences, my last concert on the States side and I was helping launch a new MTV show; RJ Live. It'd be my first live interview since I started the world tour and was rather excited about it.

I stopped to sign as many autographs outside the studio of RJ Live as I could before my bodyguards ushered me into the building. It felt good to hear the screams coming from the streets of New York.

I was led to a dressing room and was thrilled that I was able to have a few moments to myself. I didn't mind the attention but it was nice to catch some silence every once in a while.

"Alex?" I heard a knock on the door and soon Rissa was entering with a sheepish look on her face. "I don't mean to interrupt but R.J. wanted to meet you personally before the show."

I smiled and nodded my head, signalling her to let the Latina TV host inside the room.

"Hi Alex." R.J. came up to me with a huge smile and held out her hand for me to shake. "I'm R.J. and I just wanted to thank you for agreeing to do the show. I was more than stoked to find out that you'd be the first guest."

"Well I'm honoured." I squeezed her hand gently. She straightened her vintage The Doors shirt and tucked her hands in her jean pockets. " So are you excited? I've heard a lot of buzz about this new show."

R.J. laughed and tossed her brown hair over her shoulder before sitting down on the couch. "I'm nervous. I've been a radio DJ for years and this kind of just snuck up on me."

"I think it's an awesome opportunity then." I grinned and sat across from her. "Thank you for having me."

R.J. nodded and leaned forward. "So," she rubbed her hands together, "I'm trying to contain my excitement of meeting you because your music has been most inspirational. It's hard acting professional."

I had to laugh and she seemed to have relaxed. "Well I'm a fan of yours as well. I think your radio show was one of the best in the city. You have pretty great taste in music."

R.J. smiled. "My girlfriend is the lead singer of Cera. She pretty much introduced me to everything I know."

I've heard the band name being thrown around quite a lot in the city but I wasn't sure if I've ever heard of them before.

"They're a local band. They've made it big but things kind of changed for them and they went back to being local. Lia's a huge fan of yours; her band covers a lot your songs."

"Oh wow," I laughed lightly and bit my lip, "very cool. I'd love to meet her some time."

"I think that can be arranged. She's walking around this building somewhere." She chuckled and stood up. "One of the reasons why I came to you before the show is to kind of give you a rundown of what'll be going on. Basically just a simple small interview and we do have a game we're introducing, 'Truth of Fail'. Questions get asked, no matter how personal and you choose to answer. If you answer them all, we'll give away money to the charity of your choice."

I held my breath and raised an eyebrow. "Wow, well I can't let a charity down now can I?"

R.J. shook her with a smile. "Also if you're up for it, I see you brought your guitar."

I glanced over at 'Samantha'. I took her everywhere with me now that Sam had returned it. I still wasn't sure why she had shipped back the guitar I gave her. I'd ask her.

Someday.

"Well I'm up for performing a song." I nodded and scratched the back of my neck.

"That'll be great, thank you." R.J. dipped her head slightly before sneaking out the door.

I had an hour before it was show time.

--

"She has sold over 12 million copies of her latest album and is now on her final journey of the last leg of her tour. I know you all are excited to see her just as much as I am. Please welcome our Canadian rocker princess, Alex Carlin!" R.J.'s voice was practically drowned out by the screaming fans from inside and outside of the studio. I made my way from backstage and was greeted by bright spotlights and the host ushering me to a huge black plush couch. "Hi," she greeted me with a soft hug before we sat down.

I glanced towards the audience and waved to them, eliciting louder screams. R.J. laughed from beside me and handed me a mic. "Wow," she sighed and sat back, "what do you think of this greeting?"

"I'm very flattered, thank you." I smiled over towards the fans again. "Hi!"

"I heard you had a pretty good concert last night. I wanted to make it but I had other arrangements." I could tell she was loosening up a bit and it helped me to relax as well.

I hadn't done a live show before. It wasn't commercialized either so that made it a little nerve wracking. "You know the fans make it worthwhile. I had such an amazing concert last night, it was packed, probably one of the loudest crowds ever."

"We take our music very seriously." R.J. winked. "So when is your last show?"

"Well tonight is my last concert in the US and I'll be flying to Vancouver tomorrow. I have five more to go and we'll actually be finishing off the tour in Midtown which is a huge deal for us." I said proudly. "I remember having to go into the city of Toronto just to catch a concert so it's nice that my hometown is kind of opening up their arena."

"Wow, that is a big deal. I bet you're looking forward to heading home. Anything new you're planning on working on after this?"

I paused at the question and grinned towards the flashing cameras. "Well I do have a few things lined up but nothing I can talk about." I finished with a laugh.

"Okay, now I'm really curious. Can you give us a hint?" She asked me, her blue eyes sparkling.

"Only that it involves music." I crossed my legs and adjusted my black tank top briefly as I made myself more comfortable on the couch. "Once it's in solid stone, I may come back and spill."

"Fair enough." She nodded and glanced over towards the audience. "So how was travelling around the world?"

"You know, I don't think that could ever get old. There are times I'll be able to explore the area I am in for a bit. When I was in Sydney, Australia during the beginning of my tour I was able to check out the art galleries and museums. It was very cool."

"Have you been able to check out much of New York City?" She asked me.

"Not this time around, no. I was able to explore it a bit the last time I was here. I'd love to take a whole week off and just explore this place. I grew up in a smaller town and Toronto was only about forty minutes away and once my sister got her driver's licence, she let me go with her and there'd be times we'd get lost. It was fun." I laughed at the memories of Spencer trying to find her way around the city. We eventually knew our way around to certain areas.

"Ah, the infamous sister. How cool is it that you two were able to accomplish your dreams? I mean she did play for Team Canada and I read that was a huge deal for her."

"Oh yeah," I nodded, "my sister always knew she'd be on the team. She was that good! I'm very proud of what she's accomplished with her career. I've always wanted to be involved in music and I guess I have her to thank for that."

"How so?"

"Well she was the one that started out with an interest in music. My parents bought her a guitar one year and she would write songs with lyrics, sometimes she'd sing. She would never admit that she was good at it though. One day she was at a hockey practice and left her guitar out. I picked it up and I knew at that moment I was going to like the feel of it in my hands." The crowd had picked up some noise a bit and I waved at the fans that I could see outside in the streets of Time Square.

"And that's when Alex Carlin was born." R.J. grinned and patted my leg.

The rest of the interview went rather smoothly. Same questions that have been asked before but I didn't mind.

"Okay, so we're sadly coming to an end of this lovely interview. I know, it's tragic." R.J. was faced towards the camera man while I sat in a blue bean bag chair that I was asked to sit in. "We do have a few more questions for Alex and this is something we like to call 'Truth or Fail'. Basically what will happen is Alex will be asked five questions total and if she happens to answer them all without passing, we will donate five thousand dollars to the charity of her choice. Are you ready?" She turned to me and grinned, a hand on her hip.

I was slightly nervous because I knew how important people wanted into your personal life. I braced myself and put on a brave smile. "Bring it on!"

"Alright, this first question was emailed in from Kari in Massachusetts. What is your inspiration to write your songs, what drives you to share them with the world?"

"Oh wow, that's a good one." I chuckled and picked at the rip in my jeans. "Um, well my inspiration is obviously the people in my life. In my experiences I think you should take those moments very seriously. I think it's also important to share those things as well, it's therapeutic. I write about them and it makes me feel lighter somehow. When they're being shared with the world and I can help others through painful or happy things, I know I'm doing my job."

"Very well answered, Alex. I can tell you've been through a lot just listening to some of the lyrics, you're very good at that." R.J. said softly.

I smiled and said my 'thank you' in the mic softly.

"Alright, we have a phone call question. Wow, this one's coming in all the way from South Africa! Hello?"

"_Hello!" _A woman on the other end answered. I had to say I loved her accent_._

"So I'm guessing this is costing you a lot of money?" R.J. laughed.

"_It's worth it."_

The crowd laughed. "What's your name and your question?" R.J. played with the rings on her fingers.

"_My name is Trace and my question is if you had to choose a song from any band or artist to best describe your life, what would it be?"_

"All these questions are refreshing so far," I snickered and tucked hair behind my ear. "Well Trace, first of all I love your accent. A song that would best describe me or my life? I'd have to say..." I paused and scratched my head. "Hate Me by Blue October. Definitely an old song but it stuck with me."

"_May I ask why?"_

The crowd quieted down as R.J. looked at me curiously. She gave me a slight nod and I cleared my throat. "There are things I'm not proud of in my life with choices I've made. This song just kind of describes how I've hurt people and I'd understand if they resent me in some sort of way. I hope that they don't go as far as hating me but it is safe to say I hated myself."

"I don't think it's possible for anyone to hate you." R.J. spoke and thanked Trace for calling. "Okay, we have an in audience question." She moved towards the center of the audience and stopped on a light brunette. "What is your name and where are you from?"

"My name is Tarah and I'm from here in New York." Her icy blue eyes caught mine and she licked her lips. "So we hear your big sister is back with her high school sweetheart Ashley Davies who helped you put out your first two albums. During that time, they were estranged. Was there ever a time that you took it upon yourself to fill the void your sister left in her heart and in her bed?"

"Yeow!" R.J. hissed into the mic and the crowd gasped, booed and cheered.

I caught the woman's glance and she shared with me a cocky smirk, just waiting for my reaction. I had to raise an eyebrow and smile a little bit. I shouldn't be surprised by the question, especially during a live show that millions were possibly watching.

"I want to send out congratulations to my sister and Ashley on their recent engagement, they deserve the best. And no, Tarah, I've never once tried to fill any void in Ashley's life during our time of working together on my albums. She is so completely in love with Spencer, it's sickening. I know for a fact Ashley would never allow that to happen and I would never do that to my sister at all. We're best friends and that's all we ever were."

"So you weren't in love with her in any way?" Tarah asked.

"No. I was never in love with Ashley. I had a girlfriend back then that I was crazy about as well." The last part of my answer kind of sped my heart up a bit. I was having slight flashbacks of my break up with Sammy and how it had gone public within hours. She had to hide out for a while until it all blew over and I felt so bad for her. I couldn't have blamed her if she never wanted to see me again. I also knew that my answer to her question would rouse up new ideas of her. How I broke her heart. How it all went down.

"Pretty brave in answering that question." R.J. laughed, before she introduced the next caller with a question. "We have Erin from London, Ontario. Welcome Erin, what is your question for Alex?"

"_If you could go back and change something major that happened in your life, would you do it?"_

"You know they say you shouldn't live without regrets but I don't believe in that. You just have to learn from the mistakes you've made and hope for the best in the future. However, I guess there'd be some things I would like to change. A part of me would be sceptical about it because whatever path I chose to go down in the past, helped me realize that I didn't like who I was becoming. I've made stupid mistakes and I'm just thankful I'm still here and talking to the ones I love and being accepted in spite of everything." I smiled softly and placed the mic gently in my lap while R.J. mentioned the seriousness in my answers. Maybe she was surprised I was more of an open book than most artists would be, especially on a live show that couldn't be edited.

"Okay, last question and you're off the hook. Think you can handle it?" The host teased before scouting someone else out in the crowd. "Hi! What's your name, where are you from?"

"Hi Alex," the younger female smiled warmly, "my name is Whitney, I'm from Tennessee. It's been news that you and Tracey had broken up a while back. I was wondering if you had any new love interests in mind?"

"I knew this question was coming. I could feel it." I laughed and bit my lip briefly before thinking of a way to word the answer. "First off, props to Tracey. She's an amazing woman with such an incredible heart and deserves so much in this world, I truly do wish her that best. As for a new love interest; does my guitar count?" I teased and inhaled with a smile. "I haven't really been focusing on that part of my life. I've been busy with touring and the woman I want to be with deserves every ounce of my attention. I want to be able to offer her that."

"So there is a woman?" R.J. raised an eyebrow, making her way back towards me and the stage.

"Perhaps." I answered with a blush and was thankful it was the last question. Being on the hot seat wasn't all that fun.

"Okay well you're not off the hook yet. You mentioned your guitar; would you be willing to play us something? _Perhaps_ maybe your encore song?" She glanced at me knowingly and I smirked, nodding.

A couple of guys set up a stool and mic for me onstage quickly while I grabbed my guitar, holding it close to me.

It wasn't long before I was up on that stool, tuning my guitar out of habit. "So I bet everyone's wondering why I always chose this song as my 'encore' piece. It's been with me since high school and out of everything that has happened, this incredible woman has never lost faith in me. This song keeps me grounded because she does as well." I looked back at the one guy who was on drums and nodded him to count me in.

_White snowflakes all around  
The sky is high, and with you the  
Stars fall down_

_All day I've been dreaming,  
Killer blue,  
Raging red,  
The things you do  
The things you've said_

_So come lie with me in this bed  
Of white snowflakes  
Come and melt the world with me  
I'll do whatever it takes  
I'll expose my deepest layer  
I'll show you how to breathe,  
Samantha Taylor_

_Crystal raindrops touch the ground  
Every ripple is another desire,  
A part of me I have found_

_I can feel you within me  
Your eyes so breathtaking  
Your lips so tantalizing  
In the things you do,  
The things you've said_

_So come lie with me in this bed  
of mellow raindrops  
Come and soak up this love with me  
Until my heart stops  
I'll expose my deepest layer  
I'll show you how to breathe,  
Samantha Taylor_

_It doesn't hurt to want you this much  
I can only think about your burning touch  
The way your smile is the best part of you  
And how you make it so easy to fall in love with you_

_Oh oh Samantha Taylor,  
I'll expose my deepest layer  
I'll treat you with so much desire  
We'll have this love up in fire  
Samantha Taylor_

_Come and lie with me in this bed  
Of white snowflakes  
Come and melt the world with me  
I'll do whatever it takes  
I'll expose myself in every layer  
Because I'm so in love with  
Samantha Taylor_

Once I was done, I was overwhelmed by the cheers and whistles. I bowed my head in thanks and placed my guitar down beside me, getting up to join R.J. near a huge picture window.

"Well Alex Carlin, you've been an awesome guest. I just want to thank you again for dropping by. I'll keep my end of the bargain. We're more than happy to donate five thousand dollars to any charity of your choice." She wrapped an arm around my shoulder and waited for my answer.

"The Children's Development project." I said without hesitation. "I think it's in their best interest to build a friendlier environment for all of the group homes, foster homes and centers while children of all ages are waiting for that one family to provide them love, safety and security." I nodded seriously and smiled when the crowd cheered.

"I agree." R.J. nodded and clapped. "Well I wish you all the best with the remainder of your tour and your mysterious project and love life." She laughed and turned to the cameras hovering around us. "And thank you to the viewers who stuck around to watch us. I'm R.J. and tune into R.J. Live again tomorrow, same place, same time."

--

I spent two hours at a booth signing autographs and getting pictures taken with fans. I was exhausted but I couldn't contain how happy I was with the way the day turn out.

One teenage boy had asked me if I missed Sammy. I couldn't lie to him or myself so I told him the truth. I missed her more and more each day but knew walking away that last time was the best choice for the both of us. I've emailed her a few times and she kindly replied but it was all work related; nothing too personal in fear of making things worse.

"Alex!" R.J. caught up to me at the small after gathering and handed me a beer. "I think I need to have you on my show every day." She laughed softly and took a sip of her own drink. "I've never seen a crowd that crazy, not even when Carson Daly had his show."

"Wow, I wasn't even high school yet when he was on air." I chuckled and savoured the bitter taste in my mouth. "I think you're going to do great with your show. You made me feel very comfortable, thank you."

She waved her hand slightly and shook her head with a smile. "So my girlfriend is dying to meet you, would that be okay?"

"Yeah, of course." I laughed and allowed her to drag me to the other side of the greenroom. I noticed a woman with long black hair and dressed all in the colour, laughing with a guitar in her hand. She seemed to have sensed us walking towards her and she hopped up, placing said guitar on the leather couch.

"Hey baby," she husked softly, pulling R.J. in for a kiss, wrapping her arm around the woman's waist. Her hazel eyes caught mine and she smiled widely. "Alex Carlin. It's finally a pleasure to meet you. You are one talented musician." She held out her hand for me to shake. "I'm Lia."

"You know, your girl is extremely proud of you." I offered and she blushed slightly.

"She tends to exaggerate." She laughed and glanced at her girlfriend. I knew that look - a look of pure devotion and love. "Don't let her fool you."

"Okay," I nodded and pointed towards her guitar with the bottle before taking a swig, "play for me. Prove her wrong." I raised a challenging eyebrow and she seemed to stutter slightly before clutching her guitar in her hand.

"Fine, but you asked for it." She threw me a smirk. "I don't play solo though so let me grab the girls." She took off outside the room. It wasn't long before all four women were in the greenroom setting up in the furthest corner.

Let me say that if Cera were looking for a label to sign them up, I'd point them in the right direction.

--

**Ashley's PoV**

"Did you ever wonder if she was in love with you?" Spencer glanced at me after turning off the TV. We were curled up on our bed comfortably. We had just finished watching Alex's interview on R.J. Live that was on repeat later on that night.

I laughed and cuddled her closer to me. "No, I knew she wasn't in love with me." I kissed her temple and tucked my hand underneath her jersey, stroking the firm stomach underneath. "Alex was so in love with Sam and she knew how I felt about you."

"It would've made sense." She stretched her neck to look up at me. "You are smoking hot."

"Yes because that would be the only reason why she'd be in love with me." I rolled my eyes playfully and tickled her, causing her to giggle slightly.

"I can't believe she just told Sammy she was ready." Spencer sat up and ran her hand through her hair, yanking all the tangles out. "Not in so many words, but she did."

"I'm sure Sam knows that anyway." I said softly. "How can she not? Alex's whole life with Tracey ended because of their love for each other. No one's stupid enough to think otherwise."

"No, I know. It's just Alex was so closed up before, you know? I think this tour has helped her." Spencer smiled and decided to curl back into me, her arm wrapped tightly around my waist.

"Well hell yes for the congratulate shout out!" I cheered, causing her to laugh and roll me over, straddling my hips. "Can I say that the big day cannot come soon enough?"

Spencer smiled shyly and lowered her body on top of mine, tucking strands of hair behind my ear before trailing her fingers down my neck. "Yeah? Is it because you want everything I own?"

"You only have one thing that I'm interested in." I teased and smacked her ass, causing her to shriek and slap me playfully. "Abuse already? Spencer, I'm shocked."

"Shut up." She laughed and kissed the tip of my chin. "So what are you interested in?"

"Just you." I shrugged honestly. I wanted to bring up my idea for the wedding and figured the timing was perfect. I traced my hands under her jersey and up her sides. "Hey, I had a thought about the wedding."

Spencer lifted her head up and looked at me curiously. "Yeah?" She breathed, her eyes lighting up.

"Well you're going to make one gorgeous bride baby and I want it all to be perfect for you." I squeezed her hips lightly and lifted my head to capture her sweet lips briefly.

"I don't want anything extravagant Ash, you know that." Spencer replied lightly.

"Well good because I'm not talking extravagant." I grinned. "I'm talking location."

She sat up, straddling me once again. Her blonde hair fell over her shoulders as she raised an eyebrow. "We're not talking the courtyard here?"

"No." I sat up and pulled her tighter to me on my lap. "I'm talking where it all began," I whispered, my lips brushing over her face gently, "I'm talking your hometown."

"Ash..." She breathed.

"Seriously Spence," I pulled back slowly, "it's the perfect location. Our friends and family live there. It makes sense. I think it'll help heal the little things we left unfinished back then. Midtown deserves to be graced with our killer love once again." I winked and she bit her lip, her arms tightening around my neck before pulling me into a heart stopping kiss. Once we pulled back, I couldn't wipe the stupid grin off my face. "Is that a yes?"

Spencer only nodded and knocked me back down, kissing me with a deeper passion.

I'm guessing I was about to get a mind blowing 'thank you'.

--

_**A/N: The song, 'Samantha Taylor' is obviously mine. Not the best but Alex did write it in high school. Aw, that love struck puppy.**_


	113. Desktop Love

_WHOA! Don't blink, you might miss this update. My deepest apologies for delaying this, I hope to be better in the near future seeing as this fic is coming to an end (eventually). You've all been wonderful, really. Thank you for keeping on my ass through your PM's, emails, tweets & facebook messages. I won't let you down!_

**Rated M for sexual content.**

**_Enjoy!_**

**83.1 – Desktop Love**

**Spencer's PoV**

I knew we were perfect for each other. I knew that since the moment we met at my 17th birthday party that one fateful day. It was in the air and even after the horrible heartache right before graduation, a part of me could not let go because I felt this moment beyond the horizon. Our fairytale was probably just beginning and we'd have more bumpy rough spots on the road along the way but what mattered was that we'd be going through them together.

As a family.

Ashley had called earlier that day stating she had a meeting with the School Board and didn't know what time she'd be home for dinner. She was sweet and told me to go ahead and fix the kids something and promised she'd make it up to me with an adult version of a delicious dessert.

Like I was really going to refuse that.

The problem was that I didn't have the kids because I was planning a special dinner for just the two of us. Chase and Ephiny offered to help me out but I didn't have the heart to tell Ashley the truth because I knew she'd feel bad and rush things when she shouldn't have too. My job springs last minute meetings on me all the time so I understood.

Somehow though, I found myself in front of the school where I noticed Ashley's mustang parked in her regular parking spot. I figured it wouldn't hurt to go and wait in the music room by her office until her meeting was over with.

My heels clicked softly against the polished floor as I made my way down towards the basement of the school. It was eerily quiet and the janitor I passed just gave me a head nod and continued taking the trash out of the garbage can.

The music room door was unlocked and only the last rows of lights were on. I thought I'd try and see if her office door was unlocked but to my surprise the lights were on and I could hear shuffling of paper on the other side. She had the blinds closed so I couldn't see her but when she started humming a tune; I knew it was her for sure.

Looking down at my jeans and Team Canada hoodie, I smoothed myself out and tucked hair behinds my ears before inhaling deeply. My knuckles hit the door in a soft knock.

"It's open!" Ashley called out softly from the other side.

I turned the knob and pushed the door open. I was greeted with Ashley's back as she dug through her file cabinet. "Do you randomly yell that out to anybody?" She slammed the file door shut and spun around to look at me.

"Jesus Spence! You scared me." A smile graced her lips as she threw her papers on her desk and greeted me with a kiss. "No, I don't _always _randomly yell that out," she allowed her eyes to drag up my body and wiggled her eyebrows, "just to the hot ones."

"Touché." I beamed and stepped back to admire her hair up in a messy bun, glasses perched over her nose and her black _tie_ hanging loosely around her neck. "I see you dressed up for this meeting?" I scanned her body and internally groaned at how perfect her black slacks made her ass look.

"No," she laughed and tugged at the tie, "I wore this when I left the house this morning."

No she didn't. I would've noticed the tie.

"I just didn't have this on," she trailed the tip of the tie along my cheek, her eyes dancing playfully, "because I knew I'd never leave the house on time."

Good point.

"Wise decision baby." I slid my arms around her neck and pulled her body flush against mine. "You know me so well."

Ashley wrinkled her nose up in a grin and kissed me again, a little deeper that time. "So what did I do to earn this lovely surprise visit?" She murmured and giggled a little when I trailed my hands down her back, over the thin material of her white buttoned up shirt.

"I don't do this often enough." I pouted and she kissed my lips again.

"Where are the kids?" She asked, her lips moving to my ear.

"Chase and Eph have them." I breathed and pressed my hands against the small of her back. "How was your meeting?"

"Long." Ashley whispered and tugged at my earlobe with her teeth, earning a hiss from me. "Boring."

"Yeah." I let out breathlessly and tugged her lips back up to mine, pushing her backwards and into the file cabinet beside her desk. To think, my intentions of coming here weren't really to seduce her, but it seems she had turned the tables.

"I've missed you." Ashley whispered against my mouth and bunched my hoodie up in her fists. "I can grade these papers tomorrow morning, let's go home."

"I thought you were running late because of a meeting?" I asked, pulling back slightly.

"I was just about to phone you to let you know I was just going to finish grading these tests." She pointed to the mess on her desk and tugged me back into her. "If I'd known you were going to be alone tonight, I would've skipped it and came right home."

"I had dinner planned and everything." I pouted again and she chuckled softly, telling me with her eyes that she was more than willing to make up for it.

"Home?" She asked, biting her lip.

I scanned the office area and realized I could make a fantasy come true. I've imagined myself taking her in this office, granted it was always during her lunch breaks but after hours would do too.

I had to pay her back for the one time she met me at my work and had her way with me on my desk before leaving to head back to work.

"Here." I nodded and grabbed her by the tie, gently swinging her around so that she could sit on the edge of the desk. I took the glasses off her and carefully placed them on the shelf beside us.

"Here?" She squeaked and glanced down on my fingers that were slowly undoing the buttons of her shirt. "Spence-"

"Here." I said more firmly and whipped off my hoodie, revealing Ashley's old Southwood High t-shirt. My fingers went back to work and tugged off her shirt, sliding it down her shoulders while my lips met hers in a desperate kiss.

Thankfully she didn't protest. I felt her fingers working the button on my jeans and yanking them down my legs, groaning into my mouth when she found I was wearing no underwear.

"I love laundry day." She mumbled throatily and allowed me to rid her of her bra, while she leaned back, bracing herself on the desk full of papers.

"Laundry day is tomorrow." I grinned against her lips and winked, standing straight to kick off my jeans.

Ashley took the opportunity to reach behind her and swipe all the papers off her desk. I gasped and she looked at me with a shrug of her shoulders before handing me the end of her tie. "Close your mouth Carlin and put it to use." She nearly growled, grabbing me by the hips and crashing our bodies together, her mouth easily finding mine.

I moaned deeply and thread my fingers through her luscious waves; letting her hair down from her bun, before pulling on it just hard enough for her to groan and tilt her head back, allowing my mouth to trail kisses hotly down her neck.

"Fuck." The word leaves her lips in almost a strangled whisper when my tongue finds her left nipple. Her nails dig into my back and she pushed herself forward.

My plan wasn't to have us fully naked on her desk but with the way her hands were constantly smoothing over my heated body, I could care less.

I shifted a bit so I was hovering over her, my left hand balancing me perfectly. Her eyes were so dark and her lips were swollen. I licked my own swollen lips and blinked heavily, watching her reaction as my right hand trailed down her sides, over the firmness of her belly and right to my goal. She shuddered and arched her body upwards, moaning deeply when my fingers found her wet and wanting.

"Please tell me you were going to wear that tie to bed tonight at least." I teased and gave her a sultry smile when she nodded. "God Ash, you're so fucking hot." I pushed two fingers in knuckle deep, growling at how hot and tight she was.

Ashley's hips started the tempo, her hands grasped at my arms, my shoulders, then my face, pulling me down to kiss her. She panted heavily the harder I thrust and she gasped and mewled at every passing stroke my thumb made against her swollen clit.

"Fuck Spencer," she ripped her mouth away from mine and sat up a bit, rocking her hips still. She wanted to be in charge so I let her while I made myself comfortable to have her climb onto my lap. I felt my fingers dip deeper as she opened up more for me. The heavy throb between my legs was almost unbearable but I knew bringing Ashley to her orgasm would more than satisfy me.

For the moment.

Her beautiful and sexy tattooed hips moved harder as her head tossed back. I could feel her drip with each grind and fought back the urge to toss her onto her back and fuck her hard.

Ashley had a thing about being in control sometimes and I wasn't about to ruin it for her. Though I knew she'd thoroughly enjoy it.

"Spence..." My name fell from her lips and I made use of the tie, grabbing it with my left hand and tugging on it with each downward movement she made. Her eyes could barely stay open but they did. Onyx eyes held mine for every single second that she started to come apart. She was wound up so tight that her body could do nothing but recoil. I sealed my lips against her in order to stifle her loud screams as much as I could without tipping off the janitor what was going on.

Ashley's heated body slowed down as did our rough kissing, settling into a more leisure and slow pace. I eased my fingers away gently and she sighed, her fingers running through my hair, lightly biting on my bottom lip before sucking on it briefly. "Wow." Was all she said when she pulled back, her eyes heavy lidded and a satisfied smile plastered on her face. "Where'd that come from?"

I smirked and kissed her softly again. "You really have to ask? You're a hot music teaching MILF."

Ashley laughed and shifted causing me to wince. My ass was hurting from the hard surface of the desk. "I'm sorry." She rushed out and went to move off of me as quickly as she could. She groaned once her feet touched the floor and pouted. "I'm sore."

"How about," I whispered thoughtfully and gently drew my fingers over her maple leaf tattoo before pulled her closer by the hips, "we go home, run a hot bath and work out those," I eyed her body up and down, "kinks."

Ashley grinned mischievously and nodded, pulling me up off the desk and wrapping her arms around my neck. "As long as I get to work out your," she mimicked my action and eyed me up and down, "kinks first."

I shrugged, feigning annoyance. "If you must." A dramatic sigh left my lips.

She just shook her head and just when I noticed a smirk form across her face, she whipped the tie off of herself and around my neck. I gasped in surprise when my back hit the file cabinet hard and teeth tugging at my ear. "Oh I insist Carlin." She growled and after that all sense of reality was gone.

The only thing that mattered was the fact that she was on her knees with my right leg thrown over her shoulder as her tongue worked the heated flesh between my thighs.

If there were a Heaven, I'd want it to be this moment over and over again.

--

**Ashley's PoV**

Spencer had a permanent smile plastered on her face the moment I came up from between her legs and kissed her. She helped me pick up the papers off the floor after we got dressed and every five minutes she'd find a way to touch me.

"I can't believe you told Ben to make sure he cleaned the desk and floors thoroughly." I gaped at her as we exited the school. Ben, the janitor, wasn't stupid. I could see the silly grin on his face when he watched me and Spencer exit the music room.

"Well, better safe than sorry." Spencer shrugged and wiggled her eyebrows. "When the students go into your office you can feel comfort in knowing evidence of defiling your work area is erased."

I shook my head and wrapped the light scarf around my neck, knowing I'd have to wear one with my clothes to work the next day. Spencer loved to bite and I couldn't complain. The weather during the day was warm but the nights were still cool, however the breeze against my flushed face felt good.

After a short make out session against my mustang, we parted ways to meet at home.

Spencer had managed to beat me to our destination because I had to stop for gas. When I entered the warm house, I could hear her humming while the water of the bath was being drawn.

It had been more of a romantic bath with soft touches and kind kisses, hands never venturing further than on hips and lower backs. We had somehow managed to get through the whole thing without having sex, which could happen but it was rare, especially with how insatiable Spencer can be.

"How about you grab your papers to grade from your briefcase and I'll grab us a couple of drinks." Spencer suggested while wrapping a robe around her body. She noticed me raise her eyebrow at her and chuckled. "Davies, I'm not done with you. We will continue our 'session' later, I promise."

"When are the kids coming home?" I asked, sitting on the end of the bed, running a towel through my hair.

"Less than an hour." Spencer bit her lip. "Once the lights are out, your body is all mine to be de-kinked." She chuckled and blew me a kiss before leaving the room.

Grabbing a pair of yoga pants and a t-shirt, I pulled them on before spreading out my students tests on the bed and getting comfortable. Spencer came back in with two cans of Dr. Pepper, two plates of the dinner she made earlier and a bag thrown over her shoulder with her own paperwork in it.

Moments like that I lived for. We'd do our work in quiet side by side, often interrupted by wandering hands or the kids.

"So," Spencer smiled and placed her pen down, looking at me with adoration, "I was thinking."

"No surprise there." I teased and put the cap back on my red marker and gave her my undivided attention. "What's up?"

"Well, we're getting married in about three months." Her bluish grey eyes sparkled brightly at the thought and it made my heart melt. "I was thinking maybe once the girls are out of school we can take a trip."

"A trip?" I furrowed my eyes in confusion but kept a slight smile on my face.

"Yeah, I know it's not my place to push but I figured maybe it'd be a good thing." Spencer sounded a little nervous as she blew strands of blonde hair out of her face. Her cheeks were tinged with pink slightly and I couldn't help but be curious as to what she had going on in her head.

"Baby," I whispered and cupped her face, smoothing her soft cheeks with my thumbs lightly, "help me out here."

"B.C." She blurted out and squeezed her eyes shut before swallowing. My heart sped up and she knew I was catching on. "We should go and you know, maybe for closure, a blessing... to remember them."

For the first time I didn't want to break down at the thought of never seeing my parents again. No, I wanted to break down because I was ready for anything life had coming my way as long as I had my family. I never really got to say goodbye to them and neither had Dylan. It was only fair and the timing couldn't be any more perfect. I had to, in some way, tell my dad that he was right, Spencer was a keeper.

"I like the sounds of that." I whispered, wiping the tears that escaped me.

"Yeah?" She blinked and sighed with relief, pulling me into a hug. "I'll hold your hand every single second." Spencer whispered in my ear.

"Good because I don't plan on letting you go." I smiled softly and relaxed completely in her arms.

It was going to be the best year ever.

I could feel it.

--


	114. First Heartbreak

_Don't own Ashley/Spencer. I have joint custody on the Wynters family and Lucas/Dylan/Matthew are mine._

_Catching up with Jaiden and Lucas._

_**Enjoy!**_

**83.2 – First Heartbreak**

**Jaiden's PoV**

I glanced at her slightly from across the room. Seemed Eliza had been trying to avoid me and I couldn't understand why. I had to admit things were rough, especially after she came out to her parents without letting me know. I got a phone call telling me she needed a place to crash and luckily my parents were understanding enough to lend her the couch. That had been well over a week ago.

However, since that night she'd been distant, more so than usual. Her clothes were at my house, her belongings were at my house, she was living with me but I rarely saw her. She'd make plans with her other friends before it was time to go home from school and when she would be in for the night, she claimed she had homework to do and was tired.

It was more than frustrating and my parents picked up on it. Their efforts to talk to Eliza were rebuffed and everyone seemed on edge under the roof.

Tapping my pencil against my music stand, I sighed heavily and threw my head back. I was exhausted. It wasn't easy having your girlfriend ignore you. It left me wondering briefly if that's what we even were anymore.

"Wynters." Ashley tapped my stand, snapping me out of my thoughts. "Did you hear a word I said?"

"No." I sat up straight and looked at her apologetically. "I'm sorry Miss Davies."

Her gaze softened and I could only assume my parents talked to her and Spencer about everything that had been happening. "Please try and focus." She said in a softer tone and pointed towards the scale in my music book. "We're going to be working on some new stuff but what I want from you guys is a small self-written piece of music to be presented to me by next Friday."

The class groaned and Ashley just gave them her charming smile and made her way up to the front of the class. "I won't be mean and make you perform it in front of the class. We'll set up private sessions that'll probably carry out until next Tuesday. Don't let that be a reason to procrastinate. I'll be choosing students randomly so be prepared."

The bell rang and most of the class moved quickly to put their instruments away while others took their time, in no hurry to rush for lunch.

I was one of the ones trying to pack my things up in hurry so I could catch my _girlfriend_ before she randomly disappeared again.

"Jaiden, a word?" Ashley approached me in the middle of my fast attempt to get my guitar put in its case.

I shook my head when I caught Eliza leaving quickly. "Not now." I muttered, dropping everything in my hands to chase after the girl who had stolen my heart. "Lize!" I caught up to her and gently turned her around, trying not to look hurt when she flinched at my touch. "What's the hurry?" I asked surprisingly calm.

"Plans Jaiden." Her voice held some coldness to it and I stepped back.

The confusion I had was turning into anger because as much as I tried to understand, I couldn't. Not at that moment. "If I did anything to piss you off, just let me know." I crossed my arms around my chest.

"Do we have to do this here?" She asked and swallowed, glancing around the hallway.

"If not here then where, Eliza? You won't talk to me at home." I couldn't help but raise my voice a little.

"Jaiden, just drop it."

"Drop what?" I asked and threw my hands up in the air. "You haven't given me _anything_ to drop. I'm empty handed. I don't know what's going on with you or why you're ignoring me all the fucking time." My body reached its breaking point and a flash of concern washed across her face. "I care about you, why can't you see that it hurts me, that you're hurting me."

The soft and shy look she used to get was back and she swallowed heavily. Grabbing my hand, she led me towards the girls restroom and locked it behind her before pressing me against the door, her lips hard on mine.

The kiss wasn't affectionate. It was needy and rough, almost like she was trying to prove something. Prove what though, I had no idea.

Her hands bunched my shirt up in fists at my sides before she moved her face to my neck and let out a sob so heartbreaking I couldn't help but wrap my arms around her. "Hey," I kissed her head and brought her face up to meet mine. Tears wouldn't stop streaming from her eyes and it broke my heart. "What's wrong?"

"I-" Liza scurried out of my embrace and wiped her face almost violently. "I'm sorry, I can't do this." She unlocked the door but before she opened it, I shoved it shut again, blocking her way. "Jai, please?" The plea was desperate enough that it made me almost move. Almost.

"What's wrong?" I asked again, my voice a little softer that time. "Eliza, please?"

Her curly hair fell in front of her face as she bent her head. "I can't do this." She whispered and shook her head. "I just can't."

"Do what?" Panic rose inside of me and I couldn't even begin to understand what she meant by that. "Lize..."

"Just stop!" She yelled and glared at me, eyes puffy red. "Stop being so damn nice to me when I've been nothing but a jerk to you."

I frowned and ran a hand through my hair. "If you'd just tell me what's going on inside of that beautiful head of yours."

"Jaiden." Eliza warned dangerously.

"What?" I barked back. "You expect me to just sit back and let you ignore me? You live with me! I've been trying for over a week to get you to talk to me. My girlfriend. I miss you." I was nearly shaking at that point and willed myself not to break down. The look on her face scared me, it was a look of pain, regret, sympathy.

"I've missed you too." Her confession was sincere enough but her body language was anything but comfortable.

I stepped closer to her and she didn't move away. She allowed my arms to slip around her waist, pulling her closer to me. She allowed my lips to linger on her teary cheek before turning her head to capture them in a gentle kiss. "Eliza, I love you." I breathed and felt the blood rushing to my ears when she broke down once again only instead of pushing me away, she held me close.

"You shouldn't." She whispered and held me tighter. "I'm so sorry Jaiden." Pulling back slowly, Liza placed a soft kiss on my forehead. "I- you know I love you but I can't. I _can't._"

"Yes, you can." I frowned.

"No, I can't. I miss them, I miss my parents." She shook her head and moved towards the sink, her head bent over it.

My heart was beating hard. Too hard. I didn't like feeling this way. I knew, I felt it, I knew what she was going to do. "You're going back, aren't you?" I stayed put, suddenly feeling too exhausted to move.

Eliza just nodded and turned to face me again. "I'm sorry." Was all she said before brushing passed me to leave the restroom.

"Liza?" I called out and she stopped but never turned around. "When you say 'you can't', does that mean you can't be with me anymore?"

Silence filled the room before I witnessed her shoulders slump and she left without so much as an answer.

Shattered and on the dirty floor – that was where my heart landed for the first time.

--

**Lucas' PoV**

School would be over soon and we'd be able to look forward to our trip to Midtown for my parents' wedding. I couldn't wait but Momma wouldn't let me in on anymore wedding secrets.

"Why does it have to be raining?" Dylan grumbled beside me as we waited for Mom to pick us up after school. "I wanted to play outside."

"We can still play outside." I laughed. She was such a girl sometimes. Actually she loved to be rough out on the ice but as of lately, Dylan hated to get dirty.

"Really?" She raised a dark eyebrow and squinted at me. "Oh there she is!" She pointed to the black Blazer that pulled up to the side of the road.

Taking her hand in mine, we ran across the street after looking both ways and scooted into the vehicle, dripping from the April showers. "Hey little man." I greeted Matthew as he grinned and gave me a fist pump.

"Hi Matthew." Dylan got into the seat beside him and buckled up. "Hi Mom." She grinned at the older blonde in the driver's seat.

"Ladies." Mom smiled and pulled back out onto the road once we were settled in. "How was school?"

"Good." I smiled and patted my backpack. "No homework for me!"

"I have math homework." Dylan sighed in the seat behind me. "How was your day, Mom?"

"Good." She smiled warmly and headed for home. "I was thinking we could have a pizza night, what do you think?"

"Pizza!" Matthew screamed and I laughed as he pumped his fists into the air excitedly.

Mom chuckled. "I'm guessing he's all for the pizza."

"Can I go to Jason's this weekend?" Dylan asked and I looked back at her. She shot me a look that said 'keep your mouth shut' so I did. I'd bug her about how she was holding his hand by the slide at recess but I didn't feel like playing that bratty sister role.

"I don't know Dyl," Mom shrugged and continued to watch the road, "you've been spending a lot of your weekends together. I'm starting to think you two are serious."

I giggled and Dylan kicked the back of my seat. "Mom said it, not me!"

"We're not serious!" She pouted. "I just like hanging out with him."

The worried look on my mom's face was priceless but I decided to calm her nerves a bit. "No worries Ma, I promise I never let me eyes off them during recess. They're best friends."

"Yes, just like Hadley and Luc." Dylan smirked.

"Yeah see? That's what scares me." Mom shot me a look briefly.

I just shrugged and watched the trees go by as we turned down the road towards our house.

Momma's Mustang was already parked in the driveway and that made me giddy. I loved it when she was home before us because she'd always have snacks ready or greet us at the door with hugs.

Stepping into the house, I was greeted with a hug and I knew I'd never grow to be too old for one of those. She had one of the best hugs in the world. "Hey munchkins." She grinned when I rolled my eyes.

"Momma!" Matthew hurried into the house with his boot clunking against the hardwood floor to get his afternoon hug.

Momma scooped him up and twirled around once before kissing him on the cheek and setting him down. He happily ran away towards his toys after stripping his coat and boots off.

Mom sighed when she wrapped her arms around Momma's waist, kissing her. Dylan and I rolled our eyes.

"Well I'm going to go outside for a bit since I have no homework." I beamed proudly but when I went to throw my backpack by the staircase like I normally would, Momma shook her head.

"Why don't you go and put your stuff in your room." She gave me a soft smile and it looked a little sad but I couldn't figure out why she'd smile sadly at me. I didn't question her though and after sharing a confused look with my mom, I grabbed my bag and ran up the stairs.

Pushing my door open, I stopped dead in my tracks to find a surprise on my bed. "Jaid?" I whispered at the curled up body. When she sat up to look at me I noticed her eyes were puffy and red.

It was the first time I felt a pain go straight through my heart and I rushed to her side. She enveloped me in a hug while she cried harder than before. I just held her tight.

Jaiden was, above everything else, my best friend and it killed me to see her so upset.

"I'm sorry." She finally sniffled and pulled back, tears still falling and splashing onto her lap. "I just, I didn't know where else to go." Her blue eyes landed on me and I couldn't help but smile a little.

I shrugged a little bit and got more comfortable on my bed, sitting cross-legged across from her. "I'm always here for you." I said honestly and sighed. "Did you want to talk about it?"

Jaiden stared at me for a few seconds before nodding her head while wiping her eyes. Taking a deep breath she just said it all in one breath, "Liza broke up with me."

While I was pretty sure Jaiden was going through her first heartbreak, I knew for a fact that at age eleven, I was right there with her.

--


	115. It Takes Time

**_A/N: Well this part actually didn't make the cut when I wrote it a while back but I figured I'd add it in anyway, because I know there are some Jaiden and Lucas fans out there. I hope you like and I'll be working on the next upcoming chapters sometime this upcoming week. :)_**

_**Enjoy!**_

**83.3 - It Takes Time**

**Ashley's PoV**

"Jackson, could you please stop speaking while I am?" I raised an eyebrow at the young skater student and sat at the edge of the desk. "Look, I know it sucks that you have to still learn things when your teacher is away, but just because I'm the substitute, doesn't mean I'll take any crap."

"I don't have a problem learning Miss D," Jeff smirked and sat back in his seat, his eyes raking up and down me, "you can teach anything you want too. You definitely have my attention."

"Fuck off you pervert." Jaiden snapped her head in Jeff's direction and flipped him the bird.

"Jaiden, language please?" I sighed but smirked a little. Lucas had given her the 'look out for my Momma' speech long ago. "As for you Jeff, I'd appreciate it if you keep your eyes above my chest area or I'll be sending you to the office."

Jaiden smirked.

Jeff slumped in his seat, his eyes dropping down to his notebook.

"Who wants to come up and read their poem?" I looked around the class for any volunteers.

Mrs. George was out sick and since it was my free period, I was asked to teach the class. I was given simple instructions for the students to read their poems and analyze a few from their texts.

Knowing how I was back in high school, no teacher meant slacking off so I wasn't getting the attention, then again I didn't expect it.

"I'll go." Jaiden shrugged and stood up, making her way towards me and sat on top of my desk, popping her gum. "Okay so, I just kind of scribbled this down but Mrs. George wanted us to write something unique yet honest. It's called 'Soul Elements'."

"Okay, whenever you're ready." I stayed where I was and had my eyes on the rest of the students in the class.

_**"Black leaves are turning yet again**_  
_**I wonder how long this feeling will last,**_  
_**Red raindrops fall from her pain**_  
_**Lining up a path, the way breaking so fast**_

_**Blue lightening strikes with force**_  
_**Killing the energy from within,**_  
_**Letting the current run its course**_  
_**Driving her sanity into oblivion**_

_**She cannot see her way no more,**_  
_**She cannot speak of how she feels,**_  
_**The elements have taken over her soul**_  
_**And to her alone she'll only be real"**_

Jaiden stopped and looked around the quiet classroom and then to me. She shrugged when I frowned slightly and made her way back to her seat.

"Thank you Jaiden, that was very deep." I smiled and clapped my hands together. I was supposed to question their subject on the poems but sometimes art screamed 'privacy needed'. Lucas taught me that one.

"She's probably gonna emo herself in the washroom during lunch." Jeff laughed.

Jaiden's lips twitched but she kept her eyes focused on her hands.

"Jeff, office. Now." I pointed towards the door.

"What?! Why?" He argued.

"Now." I stood up straight. "You wanna mouth off with things that don't concern you, go do it in the office. I'll not tolerate that kind of behaviour in my classroom, or any other for the matter."

He mumbled an apology and Jaiden smiled gratefully towards me.

"If anyone else is going to interrupt my class, I suggest you pack up, leave and expect detention." I crossed my arms and paced in front of the desk. When no one else bothered to move, I nodded and called upon another student to read their poem.

The bell rang and the class started to pile out in a hurry. "Jai," I stopped her and she dropped her bag before clinging to me, crying.

--

Chase poured me a cup of coffee and sighed. "She's just so reclusive."

"She's a teenage girl who just had her heart ripped out of her chest and stomped on." Ephiny blew on her hot coffee and flinch when Chase slapped her lightly on the arm. "What was that for?"

"Do you have to be so harsh?" The blonde raised an eyebrow then glanced at me. "She didn't say anything to you at all?"

"No." I shook my head and played with the napkin beside me. "She read a poem in class and the just broke down right after the bell rang. Eliza didn't even say goodbye before moving back to Thunder Bay with her parents last week." I frowned and thought back to when I never even had a 'proper' goodbye with Spencer when she left for Quebec for hockey.

Chase's expression was pensive and tossed her stir stick onto the table. "I hate that we never prepared ourselves for this." She said to her wife.

"Well you can't exactly prepare for this Chase." Ephiny replied softly and grasped the other woman's hand. "All heartbreaks are different. Don't you remember yours?"

Chase nodded. "This is Jai we're talking about. Sure she can be a little moody but she's never quiet. I miss hearing her yell at us for making out on the couch when she's only a room away."

I laughed and they smiled at me. "Lucas is the same."

"Speaking of her," Ephiny licked her lips, "do you think she knows everything that's going on with Jaiden?"

"Yes." I snorted. "Those two share _everything. _Which has me and Spence worried at times," I finished thoughtfully.

"You think we could weasel a few things out of her?" The brunette raised both eyebrows, wiggling in her seat a bit.

I smirked. "Doubtful. Lucas won't even let us what's going on."

"Damn." Chase muttered.

"Ladies, just breathe okay? Jaiden's going to come around and I'll tell you that I've heard her laugh a couple of times with Lucas so I know she'll be okay." I assured them. "When she's ready to talk about it she'll come to you."

The chimes above Rapture's entrance rang and we all swung around to see Spencer walk in with the kids in front of her. Her eyes caught mine and she gave me a soft smile, pointing towards the booth.

"I guess that's my cue to get back to work." Ephiny scrunched up her nose a bit and made her way towards our regular booth.

"Ash?" Chase placed a hand on my shoulder. "Thank you for watching over Jai for us. I know she'll come around but knowing that you're there for her, even if it's in a silent kind of way, it makes me and Eph feel a lot better."

"She's like family, I really don't mind." I gave her a reassuring smile and grabbed my cup of coffee. "I'll try and get some details from Luc but you have to promise you won't let it be known."

"I swear." The older blonder grinned and crossed her fingers over her chest. "You have my word."

I nodded and joined my family at the table. "How was school?"

"Lame-o." Lucas sighed with a scowl and banged her head on the table. "I have homework this weekend."

"It'll keep you busy." Spencer winked and was met with the stink eye from her blonde hair daughter. "Come on, you love homework."

"Not when it keeps me away from Jaid I don't." Lucas rolled her eyes and grabbed her sketchbook, placing it in front of her.

"I have homework." Dylan shrugged. "I have to do a project on an animal of my choice."

"Cows go moo." Matthew beamed from his booster seat and I laughed, ruffling up his curls.

"That's right." Spencer grinned and gave me a wink.

"I was thinking maybe lions? I love lions. They're fast. I like fast things." Dylan nodded to herself and leaned over her sister, "can you draw me a lion picture for my project?"

Lucas smiled widely and wrapped her arm around Dylan's shoulder. "Anything for you, sis."

All eyes turned towards the door when someone walked through and blue eyes locked onto our booth. "Ah the whole family is here." Jaiden smiled softly and made her way towards us.

"Where else would we be?" Spencer smirked and looked over the healthy side of the menu. "It Friday and I don't feel like cooking."

"Me neither." I shrugged and smiled when Matthew pointed to his favourite food: chicken fingers. "Is that what you want?"

"Please." His green eyes were pleading and ran my hand through his thick curls, nodding.

"So hey," Jaiden cleared her throat and moved around to where Lucas was, "do you think she can spend the night tonight?"

Lucas eyes went wide as she stared at Spencer's reaction and then landing her gaze on me. She didn't beg like she normally would, she sat their patiently waiting for an answer.

"I don't know, she does have homework." Spencer raised an eyebrow and smiled a little.

"Please, she'll have that done before eight tonight." Jaiden rolled her eyes and pouted, more so than Lucas was. "Please Momma?"

Spencer looked at me and nodded. "Okay but we'll be picking you up around lunch tomorrow. We have a family lunch to go to that my company is throwing."

Dylan grabbed Matthew's hand and tilted her head. "Looks like it's just me and you tonight kid."

Matthew didn't seem to mind. He giggled and repeated Dylan's name a few times before grabbing one of crayons Ephiny placed in front of them.

"Great!" Jaiden kissed Spencer's forehead, then mine. "I'll come by later and pick her up."

Chase and Ephiny watched their daughter run towards the back with amusing grins before turning back towards us.

"Thank you." Lucas smiled gratefully. "I hate seeing her heartbroken."

"We know baby." Spencer squeezed her hand. "So what would you like to eat?"

I took a moment to watch everyone interact with each other. Lucas curled into Spencer's side, repeating her thanks once again; Dylan showing Matthew how to draw hearts and other shapes while laughing together; and I was just happy to be there, experiencing every moment with them.

--

_**The poem was written by me, so please don't take. Thank you. :)**_


	116. One Step Closer

A/N - 1: _Sorry this is coming to you late. I won't make any excuses up because none of them are really that valid anyway. Please accept my sincere apology and enjoy!_

**84.1 – One Step Closer**

**~Alex's PoV~**

I finished putting the last of my mother's dishes away. Wiping my hands on my jeans, I made my way into the living room where my parents were watching some reality show on TV. "Okay, the dishes are put away, leftovers are sealed and in the fridge and I turned your coffee pot timer on for tomorrow." I sat down on the couch and blew raven hair out of my eyes.

"Thanks honey." Paula smiled and leaned over to squeeze my knee. "We should have you over every Saturday night for dinner."

"You just want me over because I clean afterwards." I teased.

Arthur snorted a little, "it's a lot more than you did as a teenager." He threw me a wink.

"Dad!" I laughed and punched him on the arm. "Okay so maybe you're right."

The older man grinned and went back to watching whatever show was airing.

"I should get going home," I sighed and kissed my mom on the cheek before repeating the action to my dad.

Grabbing my car keys, I heard my mom follow me to the door. "We really love having you back Alex," she smiled softly. "I'm very proud of you. You've definitely made a better change for yourself in the past five months. I love Tracey and I wish her the very best but I think it wise and _brave_ you decided to go ahead and find yourself."

I blushed and pulled her into a hug. "I lost something so long ago and everyone realized it way before I did. I'm just glad it wasn't too late to try and make up for it." I took my sweater off the staircase railing and wrapped it around me. "I'm happy mom, I just wish I could make it all complete."

She frowned slightly but the recognition in what I mean, registered in her eyes and she nodded. "It's still not too late for that."

I could only nod because a part of me believed her. I had asked the one person I only ever truly loved to stay away and like I knew she would, Samantha Taylor listened. I hadn't heard from her since that one evening in Johnny's.

"Thanks again for dinner," I quickly changed the subject, "I'll have to have you and dad over next weekend instead. We can watch movies on the projector in the basement."

"Okay!" Mom was always excited when it came to watching a movie of her choice on the projector. "Just let us know what time and we'll bring the dessert."

"Deal." I gave her another hug.

"Oh Alex, Glen is coming over for a late lunch tomorrow with Hannah and his new girlfriend, would you like to join us?" She flashed a smile that Spencer had inherited solely.

"I'd love to meet this new woman at my brother's side. He called me last night and couldn't shut up about her." I laughed.

"Great, we'll set an extra plate." She opened the door for me and grinned. "Please drive home safe."

"Always do." I saluted her and made my way towards my jeep.

I stopped at the gas station to fill up when I heard my cell ringing. Digging it out of my console, I smiled at the name flashing across that screen. "Ashley Davies, it's about time you call me back."

"_Sorry, I was busy bedding your sister."_ Came her reply and I couldn't even freak out over it. She always had to throw something sexual about my sister into a conversation. _"I'm taking a break, thought I'd see how things are. Your message was a little cryptic."_

"Sorry about that," I smirked and sighed, "I was actually calling to see when you and Spencer were heading to B.C."

I could hear noise on the other end and realized it was the newest member (temporary or not) of the family I had yet to meet.

"Is Matthew singing his ABC's?" I asked in a baby voice.

"_He can get up to L and then it's jumbled from there." _Ashley laughed and it brought me back to when she taught Dylan her ABC's. _"When the heck are you going to get your butt back here? You've been taking a break for the past month and we've yet to see you mooching off of your older sister."_

"I hardly mooch," I defended myself, "it's just more convenient to be there if she needed a babysitter. Unless you count that time she tried to get me to look after Lucas when Jaiden had the flu because she wanted time with Aimee. I totally sabotaged that one for you. You're welcome by the way."

"_Thanks for that visual."_ Ashley half groaned and half chuckled._"Aimee's had her closure with Spencer so we can move on from that. Why did you want to know when we were heading to B.C.?"_

I took a deep breath. "I know it's a sensitive time for you to be going there so I didn't want to impose. Now that I think about it, it's really selfish of me for even _thinking_ it'd be a good idea. How about we just forget about it and I can talk to you about it some other time?" I banged my head against my steering wheel.

Ashley cleared her throat and I could tell she was about to ask me to tell her anyway. _"Alex, please don't act like that okay? The reason for going is hard but it needs to be done. Nothing you're about to say will make it any different."_

"Well, there's this building I was scoping out in Vancouver. It's worn down and needs a little TLC but I was thinking of buying the spot and starting my own record company. You have expertise in that area and I was hoping, maybe, we can meet up and you can let me know what you think?" I held my breath and then I heard her squeal.

"_A record label? Alex, seriously?"_ She sounded overjoyed. _"I'd love to do that with you."_

"Really? The timing isn't shitty?" I asked, trying to hold my own happiness at bay.

"_I think it's perfect. I'm sure the girls want to do some sightseeing anyway so we'll make that one of our stops."_

"Wow," I breathed easily and clutched the phone in my hand tighter, "this is great, thank you so much."

"_What are sister slash best friends for?"_ She remarked with a smile in her voice.

"You're the best Ash." I sighed. "So how are my lovelies? I miss you guys so much."

"_Good, really good. Lucas and Jaiden have been attached at the hip but they always manage to find time to have Dylan with them. School's been slack seeing as it's the end of the year pretty much..."_ she started to ramble on about how the family was doing and upcoming plans, including a wedding surprise she had been cooking up for Spencer. She let me in on the secret because she needed more accomplices.

After talking to her for a little while longer, I realized it was late and the streets were starting to look bare. Pulling down my street, I noticed my outside light was on. I didn't usually turn it on because I was normally home right as the sun was setting.

My house seemed a lot bigger than when Tracey and I bought it but it was home. It was an empty home because she had cleaned her stuff out of it a while back. I never fought Tracey on anything she wanted to take. I even offered her the house but she informed me that living in Midtown wasn't an option for her. She was making a life back in Niagara Falls.

Tossing my keys into the tray by the door, I threw my bag on the staircase and continued on with my regular night time routine of grabbing cold water so I could go upstairs and run a hot bath to relax me.

Humming a tune, I flicked on the dining room light and if I were anyone else, I'd jump and scream like a little girl but her piercing blue eyes made me stop breathing momentarily. Her brown hair was down and wavy as she sat at my dining table, her hands folded neatly in front of her. I tried to speak, I did, but I couldn't make a sound.

"Hello Alexis." Sam smiled softly and licked her lips, "it's been a while."

--

A/N - 2: _I'm starting to wrap everything thing up, especially the little side-plots (including Salex). Please be patient because after this, it'll be about Spashley and their happily ever after!_


	117. I'm Not Dreaming

**Wow, it's been so long since I've updated this and my sincerest apologies. I know how much it sucks when you like something you're reading and it takes the author forever to update and I never wanted to be that person but here I am! Once again I'm on my knees begging for forgiveness. I'll try and not make you wait so long until the next update, kay? **

**You all need to thank my dear friend DeAnne for working her ass off to answer a question I posted on twitter; which entitled her to pick a fic she'd like updated (if she was right) – of course she chose Points! Also, thank you to every single one of you who messages me, compliments me, pushes me to write more, adds me or my stories onto their alerts/favourites, and thank you for being supportive and encouraging. I will not let you down! :)**

**Last but not least, thank you to my girl, bleed4her, for always pushing me and checking things over before I post. **

****Warning: this doesn't include Spashley as I'm finally wrapping up **_**this**_** particular and popular couple.**

**Enjoy!**

**Previously:**

_My house seemed a lot bigger than when Tracey and I bought it but it was home. It was an empty home because she had cleaned her stuff out of it a while back. I never fought Tracey on anything she wanted to take. I even offered her the house but she informed me that living in Midtown wasn't an option for her. She was making a life back in Niagara Falls._

_Tossing my keys into the tray by the door, I threw my bag on the staircase and continued on with my regular night time routine of grabbing cold water so I could go upstairs and run a hot bath to relax me._

_Humming a tune, I flicked on the dining room light and if I were anyone else, I'd jump and scream like a little girl but her piercing blue eyes made me stop breathing momentarily. Her brown hair was down and wavy as she sat at my dining table, her hands folded neatly in front of her. I tried to speak, I did, but I couldn't make a sound._

_"Hello Alexis." Sam smiled softly and licked her lips, "it's been a while."_

**84.2 – I'm Not Dreaming**

**~*Samantha's PoV*~**

I couldn't tell you what possessed me to break into my ex girlfriend's house. Would it be considered that if she gave me a spare key? Granted that was long before all of the confusion and mixed signals. Were they really _mixed_ signals though?

I tried not to think about her. I tried to focus on my job, travel the world, and write unusual articles on different areas and animals. It worked for a while, and by a while I mean a few days. Carmen and I had officially stopped seeing each other when we both agreed the whole 'friends with benefits' thing just wasn't working anymore.

I wasn't sure how long I had settled onto her dining chair. I figured she'd eventually come home and although I found my action to be slightly on the creepy level, Alex liked that sort of thing. I used to break into her tour bus all the time.

The vehicle pulling into the driveway washed my nerves away only to replace them by a fresh wave of new ones. I could hear her humming while the door was being unlocked and keys thrown into her key tray. I braced myself when the footsteps came closer and finally we were both blinded by the light but my eyes still managed to find hers.

Alex stopped cold in her tracks, her grey eyes wide as saucers. In any other situation I would've laughed at the sight but not that evening. The air between us cackled and I sat up straight, my hands folded on the table in front of me. Clearing my throat quietly, I licked my lips, "Hello, Alexis, it's been a while."

She opened her mouth but closed it quickly before she shook her head. "Sammy," she breathed and finally her body relaxed a little, "hi."

I picked at my fingernails briefly before giving her another look, not hiding the fact that I was checking her out. A pair of jeans with worn holes in them and a tight white tank top graced her perfect body. One thing I had hoped she never changed was her casual dressing. Jeans and a plain top – yet she managed to make it look so fashionable. "You look good," I whispered and dared to look into her eyes. She blushed and nodded her thanks before chewing on her bottom lip.

Tucking strands of black hair behind her ears, she shifted and pointed towards the kitchen. "Um, did you, did you want some coffee?"

I shook my head and slowly stood up, dangling the spare key from my right hand. "I hope you don't mind that I used it."

Alex blinked before she flashed a calm smile as she took the key and placed it back in the palm of my hand. "You're always welcomed here, Sammy." The touch lasted longer and I closed my eyes while pulling back my hand from hers and stuffed the key back into my pocket.

"I bet you're wondering why I'm here?" I questioned softly and she just tilted her head, an amused look gracing her features.

"I haven't seen you in months Sam," she chuckled quietly, "of course I'm curious."

I swallowed and leaned against the dining room table, my eyes shifting to the floor briefly before finding her grey ones staring at me with interest. "I've missed you so much," I began with a shake in my voice, "and I literally sat down and talked about the pros and cons of everything I'm about to say."

"Should we sit?" Alex interrupted softly, a frown casting over her. She gestured towards the living room and I silently followed her. I made sure there was some space between us and she nodded for me to resume my speech.

"I swear there was only one time I was this nervous," I laughed. I rubbed my hands on my jeans and licked my dry lips before reaching over to take her hand in mine. It was a comfort thing and when her fingers instantly curled around mine, I felt almost perfect.

"You sound like you're about to do a really bad break up, but we've been through those." Alex teased, twinkling eyes easing the heavy moment I've easily created.

"You hurt me pretty bad," I started off and it wiped the smile right off her face but I squeezed her hands to let her know there was more to that. "I know that high school was easier for us because we were younger and we barely had any responsibilities. It was easy to be with you even when I went away for college. Those weekend trips back to you were worth all the hard jobs I had to endure while going to school. You were worth everything back then and even when we started to fall apart, there wasn't anything I wouldn't do for you. I hate the fact that the one thing that made you happy was the one thing that tore us apart and that," I sighed and noticed tears brimming her eyes, "that was _my _fault."

"What?" She whispered, wiping the wet drops from her eyes.

I threw my head back let out a snort before laughing. "If I wasn't so jealous, you know? You were famous and I was nothing compared to you. Girls and often boys, would offer you so much just to spend one evening with you. Me? I could only offer you one evening with a note in the early mornings so I could catch a flight back home."

"Sam, what are you talking about?" Alex pulled back with a frown as she shook her head. "You weren't _nothing. _If it weren't for you, I wouldn't be out there living my dream and you know it. Those one night moments we'd spend together were the only moments worth living while on the road. Yes, you had to leave just as quickly as you got to see me, but you had a life to live as well. You were living your own dream and I understood that. I was the one always on the road and in a different country, not you."

"I can't even remember the moment it broke us completely." I closed my eyes tightly, trying to keep the heartache at bay.

"I do." Her voice sounded so small and guilty as she blinked at me through her long lashes. "In the back alley of a theatre in Chicago. I was surrounded by a lot of attractive and screaming women and all you wanted was to be with me because you only had a few hours left before catching your flight." She inhaled heavily and looked away from me. "How can you not remember that?"

I swallowed and tightened my jaw before scratching my forehead with my thumb. All of it came rushing back and I smirked a little. "You were such an attention whore, you know that?"

"Maybe so but I don't think I should've been on that day." Alex ran her fingers through her hair.

"You know, we're totally off track of why I came here." I replied with a soft smile, letting her know that I was okay after all those years. Alex had made up for the missed birthday and granted it didn't involve birthday sex, she did more than make up for it.

"I still feel bad and I know I'll never forgive myself for that day." Alex inhaled sharply and slouched back, her hands folding in her lap as she started at the fireplace in front of her.

"See, that's the thing," I scooted slightly closer and traced my fingertip briefly along her cheekbone before retreating my hand back, "we've spent so much time focusing on the bad things that happened and we're ignoring all of the good things."

Her grey eyes blinked and she bit her lip. "Sammy? Why _are_ you here?" She finally asked, a small tremor running through her body and all I wanted to do was wrap her up in my arms and hold her like I've done so many times long ago.

"I'm so tired of pretending that there's nothing left between us anymore." I whispered and stood up, tucking hair behind my ears. "I've watched you mature a lot and become the woman that everyone fell in love with back in high school. You've found yourself and it's just a beautiful sight to see."

"Sam..." she breathed and stood up with me.

"Did you mean what you said on RJ's show?" I asked in anticipation. I swallowed when she gave me a half smile and stuffed her hands in her pockets.

"Which part?" Her voice was filled with a sort of tease that'd normally frustrate the hell out of me. Yet it was good to witness once again and it was good to be on the receiving end.

"Alexis." I sighed and she grinned, stepping closer to me. Her soft yet strong hand tugging on my wrist to bring me flush against her body.

"I can be that person for you now." Was all she said before pulling me into an overdue hug. Her arms wrapped around my neck while I immediately wrapped mine around her petite waist.

If time could stand still, I'd want it to be at that moment; the moment where everything I feared with Alexis Carlin, evaporated like thin air. The moment where I knew that maybe things turned out the way they did so that we could enjoy the future we were about to embark on.

Alex sighed into my neck and her hands smoothed their way up my back, pulling me closer. I clutched at her with the same amount of force, burying my head into her shoulder. The only sound that could be heard was the clock ticking on the fire mantle and our breathing.

"Please tell me I'm not dreaming." Alex whispered and pulled back, her delicate fingers dancing along my neck before she cupped my face gently. "Please tell me that this is really happening." Grey eyes were burning with hope and desire.

"I wouldn't want it any other way." I clarified quietly and squeezed her hips, letting out a relaxed smile. "We may have a lot to talk about and we will but-"

Her lips collided with mine for the first time in _years. _A desperate moan escaped our mouths as we kissed;hot liquid kisses that threaten to melt us at that very spot. My hands tangled in her dark locks, slanting my mouth so I could taste her fully. Her hands still braced my face but slowly retreated down my back and before I knew it, her body was on top of me while I fell backwards onto the couch.

Alex pulled away from me slightly, blowing hair out of her face. She stared at me and I let her, allowing the silence to consume us. "I've waited for so long to do that."

"And I'm tired of waiting." I grabbed her by the collar of her shirt and reeled her back in. "Just kiss me for a while, okay?"

Alex bit her lip and grinned, obeying my request quite perfectly.

**~*Alex's PoV*~**

Pushing open my bedroom door quietly, I balanced the two coffee cups in my hand perfectly and shuffled across the hardwood floor. The morning sun was streaming through the curtains slightly and I smiled at the body sized lump that was still on my bed sleeping peacefully.

Placing the hot mugs on the side table, I sat on the edge of the bed and brushed brown locks away from Sam's face. Her body was curled in sheets but her shoulders were exposed to my liking. Leaning forward, I brushed my lips against the warm skin and felt her shift slightly. "Good morning," I whispered when her eyes fluttered slightly and then stunning blue stared back at me.

"Morning." Sammy grinned and sucked her bottom lip into her mouth before burying her head into the pillow, giggling slightly.

The memories of the early morning before came rushing back to me and I flushed a little. We made it hours before we decided to embark on one of the hottest, reunited, love making sessions ever. Though, I was sure Ashley and Spencer would like to compare notes just to see whose was hotter.

Sam and I made out on the couch for the longest time before we retired to my bedroom. Even once we were in bed, the kisses wouldn't stop and hands would roam but we never pushed it further from that, at least not at first.

I couldn't even describe in words what I was feeling the moment her skin was pressed against mine. Her body fit with mine perfectly. Every arch, every caress, every single word was embedded into my memory and I wondered how I went so long without her? How did I lose myself and push her away when she was the only thing that made me _feel_ like a great person inside and out?

"Penny for them?" Sammy tapped the side of my head lightly with her finger and gave me a crooked smile. "I lost you for a few seconds there."

I blushed and leaned forward, brushing my lips against her briefly before moaning, "_God_ it feels so good to be able to do that again."

"We'll make sure to do it more often then, yeah?" She pulled me down once again and tugged at the vintage t-shirt I was wearing. "Why are you dressed anyway?"

"I wouldn't call wearing just a t-shirt, dressed Sam." I chuckled and licked my lips before pointing to the side table. "I brought you some coffee, triple sugar."

"I love you." Sammy sat up and clutched the sheet to her chest. "Not just for the coffee and triple sugar of course, I mean it," she smiled, "I love you Alexis."

Feeling my heart race and hearing it pound in my ears, I tried to ignore it and rest my forehead against hers. "I love you, Samantha."

She grinned and nudged her nose with mine gently. "Come here."

I was pulled on top of her and she fell back onto the bed, her lips fused to mine. We didn't have much to talk about at that point anyway.

I doubt my parents would mind if I were a little late getting to their house for brunch. After all, I had more important matters to attend to.


	118. Baby Steps to Healing

**A/N: Hi. I won't sit here and make excuses but I will thank you for being patient and for the endless messages telling me how much they miss this. And thank you for showing me your appreciation for this fic. I am sorry it took me a year to update and although I won't promise you when my next update will be, just know I now know exactly where this is going and how it will end.**

**I will apologize for the length, it isn't as much as I would've liked but it's better than nothing so I hope you enjoy. Again, thank you for your endless support and I hope I do not disappoint!**

**Now, here we go!**

_**Previously on Points Underneath:**_

_"Well, we're getting married in about three months." Her bluish grey eyes sparkled brightly at the thought and it made my heart melt. "I was thinking maybe once the girls are out of school we can take a trip."_

_"A trip?" I furrowed my eyes in confusion but kept a slight smile on my face._

_"Yeah, I know it's not my place to push but I figured maybe it'd be a good thing." Spencer sounded a little nervous as she blew strands of blonde hair out of her face. Her cheeks were tinged with pink slightly and I couldn't help but be curious as to what she had going on in her head._

_"Baby," I whispered and cupped her face, smoothing her soft cheeks with my thumbs lightly, "help me out here."_

_"B.C." She blurted out and squeezed her eyes shut before swallowing. My heart sped up and she knew I was catching on. "We should go and you know, maybe for closure, a blessing... to remember them."_

**85.1 – Baby Steps to Healing**

**~*Ashley's PoV*~**

The gravel, beneath the tires of the white jeep rental, crunched as I pressed the break pedal slowly. There was no sound coming from the back where Matthew lay sleeping in his car seat while Lucas and Dylan had their headphones in, listening to a movie that was playing to entertain them.

I felt a hand slip through mine while the other gripped the steering wheel tight. Just the touch of her warm skin helped the knots in my stomach ease a bit. It had been years since I was outside the house I grew up in.

"We can take a few minutes if you need it." Spencer said softly and squeezed my hand in comfort.

I nodded and smiled gratefully, my hand finally letting go of the steering wheel and pushing through my hair. "Thanks Spence," I breathed.

We sat in silence before Dylan tapped on my shoulder and pulled herself up to rest her chin in the crook of my neck. "I'll hold your hand Momma."

I bit my lip, trying to keep my tears at bay for as long as I could. Spencer and I talked about my parents and how much I missed them and wished I could've done a lot of things differently before they passed away. We talked almost every day, even if they were little things we discussed for minutes here and there. I was slowly allowing myself to heal so I could be stronger for those times when Dylan asked about her grandparents. She has many great memories and I know her heart aches for them as well.

I took a deep breath and nodded, opening up the driver's side door and planting my feet onto the gravel for the first time in, what felt like centuries. It felt spongy beneath my feet and I didn't like the feeling of the unsteadiness in my stance. I braced my sweaty palms against the jeep and inhaled sharply, closing my eyes. I could hear my parents yelling at me for pulling into the driveway too fast or with my music blasting too loud. I could see my mom smiling in the doorway the very first time I brought Dylan to visit. I could smell the freshly cut grass my dad would do every Saturday morning. All the memories blasted me into the reality of them not being here anymore.

"Momma?" Lucas was at my side, her hand on the small of my back while Spencer pulled me close to her. "Come on Dyl, let's keep Matthew company until they're ready to go in."

I hadn't realized I was crying until Dylan dug her feet into the dirt and clung to me, her own eyes shimmering with tears. It broke my heart all over again and I knelt down, allowing her arms to wrap around me tightly. "I miss them too." She sniffled.

I glanced at Spencer and she had unshed tears as well. Her hand was caressing my cheek before she'd run it through Dylan's hair. She pulled us both close and kissed our cheeks. "You know, your parents are proud of you right now, Ash. You have accomplished so much. You have a beautiful little girl that is as bright as can be and you're about to gain a wife and two more kids, officially, into your family."

I managed to smile and press my lips against hers gently. "Thank you, Spencer." I whispered once again. I wiped Dylan's tears and squeezed her to me before letting go and standing up. I took her hand in mine and looked down at her. "What do you say, are you ready to go in?"

We all glanced up at the huge empty house, the keys to all the doors burning slightly in my pocket.

"Did you want us to come in?" Spencer asked, pointing to Lucas, who now had a sleepy Matthew holding her hand.

"Of course." I smiled softly and nodded my head for them to follow us to the familiar pathway.

The inside hadn't changed much. Everything was covered in dust because it took me so long to earn the bravery to step inside. Even though the smell of my childhood home was long gone, I could still pick it out when we wandered further into the foyer.

"Is this yours?" Lucas asked, looking in awe around the house.

"Legally, yes." I nodded and trailed my finger across the dust on my mom's favourite bookshelf. It was still housing all the old books she'd read when her day was slow and quiet.

"Wow." Lucas smiled grabbed Spencer's hand. "Have you ever been in here before?"

Spencer grinned and as soon as she smiled at me, all of my worries and knots melted away completely. "I have. I had a hockey game here one year and since Ashley was visiting her family for March break, I decided to surprise her."

"I think my jaw is still on the ground out there somewhere." I teased and nudged Dylan, who giggled quietly.

"Awe, you two were stupid to break up." Lucas threw out there carelessly and shrugged when Spencer scolded her. "What? It's true!"

"Well if that were true, do you really think you'd be here right now?" Spencer raised an eyebrow and lightly punched her daughter in the shoulder.

"Ew. Jaiden says 'doing it' with guys is a sin. So I don't know whether to be thankful or grossed out." Lucas huffed and Dylan gagged playfully.

"Okay, first of all I don't think you should be hanging around Jaiden for awhile because you're starting to talk like her. And second? You're a beautiful gift, no matter how or who got you here so let's leave it at that." I ruffled her blonde hair but she smacked my head away and growled a little bit.

"You cannot forbid me to see Jaiden." Lucas huffed and marched down the hallway with Matthew and Dylan in tow.

Spencer whistled and stuffed her hand in her pockets. "Wow," she breathed, "I'm kind of scared to hear her say that when she brings home a girl we both dislike."

"It'd be like Alex bringing home Isa, wouldn't you say?" I batted my eyelashes playfully and Spencer scowled before wrapping her arm around my waist.

"Please, no reminders. Isa was a phase. Sammy finally wrapped my sister's thick stubborn ass around her finger and I'm glad the nightmare of their severed relationship is over." She nuzzled my cheek.

"Mm, and we can all get married and live happily ever after." I sighed and cupped the back of her neck, bringing our lips together softly.

"Exactly." She breathed and kissed me a little deeper.

The kiss didn't last long because we heard small footsteps running towards us. I pecked her lips one more time and turned around to see Matthew coming around the corner in a baseball cap that belonged to my dad.

"Look!" He danced around proudly with the hat on and I smiled, bending down to pick him up.

"Looks good on you, bud." I lowered the cap over his eyes, causing him to giggle.

"Sorry I couldn't catch him in time. He grabbed it off the hook in the kitchen." Lucas apologized with a worried look on her face.

"It's okay." I assured her. "You two go take a look around. Dylan can show you her old room when she stayed here."

Dylan paused in her step towards to the stairs with a confused look on her face before she snapped her fingers and yelled, "I remember! Come on Lucas!"

Matthew watched the two older girls go on ahead without him but slung to Spencer's leg, making no attempt to chase after them. "Did you want a moment to yourself?" She asked me softly and I immediately shook my head. "Are you sure?"

"I'm sure Spence, but thank you." I held her hand in mine, tugging her closer. "Let's go explore a bit."

**~*Dylan's PoV*~**

"Dylan, you have a huge room!" Lucas twirled around the light purple carpet before falling back into a bean bag chair. "Your grandparents must have spoiled you."

I shrugged with a sad smile. I was missing them but had to admit that parts of my memories of them were fading a little bit and it scared me. I did remember my grandpa's famous piggy back rides all through the house and they claimed every Sunday that they had me, it was called 'Princess Dylan' day. He wouldn't let me walk anywhere by myself.

Gramma made me breakfast in bed on those mornings and then she'd attempt to teach me how to do some of her craft work. Even when I couldn't get it at first, she'd be patient with me.

"They were awesome from what I remember." I smiled at my sister and bounced on my old bed. "Momma loved to stay here on the weekends. I remember hearing her playing piano almost every Saturday night, writing songs for her job."

"I wish we could've known each other then." Lucas sat up and looked around the room. "It's a good thing our parents are getting married, eh?"

"Yes." I beamed and jumped off my bed before going into my old closet. I had a whole chest full of toys in it and decided to dig it out. "You think they'll let me take some of this stuff back home with us?"

Lucas laughed at the huge brown chest and helped me drag it out, dusting it off. "I think we should convince them to take back the bean bag chairs."

We giggled and then dug through all the toys I knew I was too old to play with now. I had more than a few that would keep Matthew busy so I shoved those aside for him. Lucas picked up a wrapped present with my name scrawled out in neat writing. I looked at it puzzled because I don't remember hiding any presents in my toy chest.

"What is it?" Lucas whispered in wonder and I shrugged, taking it from her hands. I placed it between my legs and inspected the untouched blue wrapping paper tied with white ribbon around it.

Peeling back the tape and ripping the paper every so often, I was finally holding a shoebox in my lap. Opening the box, I gasped at the black and lime green hockey skates sitting untouched and brand new. I remembered begging my mom for them but she kept saying 'maybe for Christmas' and that year it never happened. I was in foster care and lucky enough to eat a candy cane if I was good enough.

"Wow, those are awesome!" Lucas smiled and traced her finger along the lime green laces. "Why had you never opened them before now?"

"I didn't know I had them." I murmured and grabbed the piece of folded paper that was placed inside the left skate. Unfolding it, my heart was racing for some odd reason.

_"Our dearest Dylan,_  
_So you found your hidden present! Your mom may have thought it was too early to have these pair of skates but we sure didn't. We miss you and one of these days you'll have to come with us to England. Enjoy your skates and remember to wear a helmet._  
_Love, Gramma and Grandpa."_

I wiped my eyes, not realizing I was crying. Lucas hugged me and kissed my head before taking the note out of my hand and gently guiding us down the large set of stairs.

Mom and Momma were at the kitchen table looking through some papers when they noticed us walk in slowly. I clutched the box to my chest tightly while Luc handed Momma the note.

She read it slowly and then over again before her hand covered her mouth and she kneeled in front of me, pulling me into a crushing hug where she sobbed.

Mom took the note and read it as well before joining us on the floor and wrapping her arms around us both as much as she could.

**~*Spencer's PoV*~**

Ashley paced a little while the note from her parents was clutched to her chest tightly. "I was supposed to give the present to her before they came home. I totally forgot about it though. Alex's album took up some of my free time and even though I was no longer her manager, she still wanted me to have the final say in her music. God, I was really selfish, wasn't I?"

"No." I said quickly with a shake of my head. "Ash, you had a dream that you were living. You had a beautiful little girl you were taking care of and forgetting to give her a gift from your parents doesn't change that by any means."

Ashley sighed heavily and rubbed her forehead in an agitated manner. "It's just another reminder of..." she took a deep breath and sighed heavily, almost defeated like. "It's another reminder of probably disappointing my parents. Something so small may have meant the world to them."

"I know baby." I ran my fingers down her arm. "They're not disappointed in you. Even if they were still with us today, they wouldn't be upset that you forgot to give Dylan her gift. If anything having her find it buried in her toy box probably made it more special." I smiled softly at her and cupped her face with my hand, pressing our foreheads together. "You can't beat yourself up anymore. We're not here to forget about your parents because that'll never happen, but we're here to close some doors to your past and have you move on with a peace of mind."

"I know." Ashley sniffled and allowed me to wipe the tears away from her eyes. "Thank you so much Spencer. You've been my rock ever since I walked back into your life and I couldn't thank you enough."

"I love you." I replied simply and kissed her. "I'm always going to be here for you. You don't need to thank me, I'm honoured to be that person for you."

"You're so much more than that." Ashley whispered.

"Come on, let's get out of here and pay your parents a real visit. I bet your dad is patting you on the back for landing a catch like me." I nudged her playfully and she laughed.

"More like kicking me in the ass for letting you go the first time. He always told me I would regret not following you after graduation." She rolled her eyes but then nodded. "I'd have to agree with him."

We set off to find our kids to begin another emotional trip to the cemetery where my Davies girls could pay their respects and mend their hearts even more.


	119. Exposed

_**Long time, right? This may not be the longest chapter but I am working on the next one right after I finish typing this poor excuse of an author's note. For all of you who haven't given up on me or this fic, thank you a thousand times over. This is for you. Oxox**_

_**ENJOY!**_

_**/**_

_**Previously in Points Underneath…**_

_Please tell me that this is really happening." Grey eyes were burning with hope and desire._

_"I wouldn't want it any other way." I clarified quietly and squeezed her hips, letting out a relaxed smile. "We may have a lot to talk about and we will but-"_

_Her lips collided with mine for the first time in years. A desperate moan escaped our mouths as we kissed; hot liquid kisses that threaten to melt us at that very spot. My hands tangled in her dark locks, slanting my mouth so I could taste her fully. Her hands still braced my face but slowly retreated down my back and before I knew it, her body was on top of me while I fell backwards onto the couch._

_Alex pulled away from me slightly, blowing hair out of her face. She stared at me and I let her, allowing the silence to consume us. "I've waited for so long to do that."_

_/_

_"Come on, let's get out of here and pay your parents a real visit. I bet your dad is patting you on the back for landing a catch like me." I nudged her playfully and she laughed._

_"More like kicking me in the ass for letting you go the first time. He always told me I would regret not following you after graduation." She rolled her eyes but then nodded. "I'd have to agree with him."_

_We set off to find our kids to begin another emotional trip to the cemetery where my Davies girls could pay their respects and mend their hearts even more._

**85.2 - Exposed**

**~*Spencer's PoV*~**

The scene that was unfolding before me was almost like it could've been taken from a book. The wind picked up slightly but the Vancouver air was still a light warm breeze. The lake beyond us was shimmering the sunlight off its waves like diamonds – as if it were trying to let us know everything is still peaceful. Lucas was holding my hand as we watched Ashley and Dylan kneel in front of one large gravestone with the last name 'Davies' etched into it with beautiful script.

"I wish I could've met them." Lucas barely whispered.

"They would've fell hard for you." I smiled and wrapped my arm around her shoulders. "You would've loved them too."

Lucas only smiled lightly and bit her lip as she stared at her sister and Momma.

Ashley was wrapped up in a weeping Dylan but I was proud of her for staying strong. I wasn't there for her when she found out her parents had been in a fatal accident. I couldn't even imagine what she went through losing, not only her parents but then getting Dylan taken away from her.

She didn't make the best choices afterwards but I didn't judge her for it. Ashley learned things the hard way and in the end, she came out stronger. Dylan was with her everyday and she was more than thankful for that.

"Should we go see them?" Lucas asked, biting her lip and glancing worriedly over towards the gravesite.

I agreed and we slowly made our way over to them. When they broke apart from their hug, Ashley wrapped an arm my waist and looked back down at the tombstone.

"Sometimes I still think it's all a bad nightmare." She whispered and blew her nose. "Sometimes I feel like I've just talked to my father on the phone or something and yet, here they are…" Her hand shakily gestured to the spot in front of us.

I pulled her tighter against me and kissed the side of her head. "I'm proud of you for being so strong, Ash."

She smiled a little and then caressed my arm that was holding her. "Thank you for being here and I know I keep saying that but you'll never know just how strong you're allowing me to be."

"I think we're all helping each other be strong." I smiled and then felt Dylan move to my other side, grabbing my hand. "We'll make it a habit to keep this place beautiful, okay?"

"With different kinds of flowers?" Dylan asked in a hopeful tone.

"Your choice." Ashley ruffled her hair and then looked down at the stroller where Matthew was sleeping peacefully. "We should get him to the hotel so he can sleep and the girls can eat."

Dylan and Ashley kissed the top of the tombstone while Lucas stood beside them protectively. I heard her mumble something and kissed her fingers pressing them to the granite stone before grabbing her sister's hand.

"To the hotel?" Ashley teary smile broke my heart a little but I could tell that visiting her parents gravesite helped her move on a little and knowing she could come back at any time without feeling alone, it'd just help her even more.

"Then we meet Alex and hear about this huge news she has." I raised an eyebrow and kissed Ashley softly while grabbing the handles of the stroller.

"She's thinking of starting up a record label. An independent one obviously but she has done a lot of research." Ashley smiled and squeezed my hand. "She asked me to help her out with it."

My eyes widened and I grinned at my gorgeous soon to be wife. "Ash! This is great news! This is so your element."

"Yeah." She laughed softly and brushed some hair out of her eyes.

"Wait," I slowed down and frowned at her. "How long have you known about this?"

"A few weeks?" She sheepishly smiled. "With school year ending and planning this trip, it sort of slipped my mind to tell you. I thought for sure Alex would've mentioned it though."

"Alex has been low on the radar recently. I only heard from her once and it was just to say she touched down in Vancouver and will be setting up a temporary home until we were able to meet her." I shook my head and rolled my eyes. "I should've known she had some secret. She only lays low when she doesn't trust herself to spill something huge."

Ashley laughed. "Sounds like dramatic Alexis Carlin."

We reached the car and Ashley helped buckle in a sleeping Matthew in his car seat. Lucas was humming a song while she adjusted her sunglasses while Dylan sat in her seat and pulled out a book she was reading on the way to the cemetery.

The late morning trip to do a little closure for my Davies' girls went by smoothly. Another success and I had to feel somewhat proud that I could be the one person to get Ashley to open up after being so closed about her parents' death for so long.

"Momma, have you heard from Jaiden yet?" Lucas asked, leaning forwards in her seat a little as I put the vehicle in motion. Jaiden was bound to land in Vancouver sometime that morning to spend a few hours with the girls. All expenses paid by yours truly.

"Not yet, Luc. You can call her cell when we get to the hotel though, okay?" Ashley smiled at her while lacing her fingers in mine.

Lucas pumped her fists in the air and sat back in her seat, sticking her headphones in her ears for the hour drive back to the hotel.

/

**~*Alex's PoV*~**

The old warehouse building was perfect. I had already purchased it and the renovations were already in progress. I couldn't be more comfortable with my decision in opening my record label. Well, if Ashley were on total board, it'd be hers too.

"I think you're drooling." Sammy wrapped her arms around my waist from behind and kissed my neck. "You're thinking about the building again aren't you?" She teased with a low chuckle.

I turned around in her arms and raised an eyebrow at the half dressed brunette. "We have to meet Ashley and Spencer in fifteen minutes and you're not even dressed."

"Yeah well, someone makes it impossible." She winked and pecked my lips before walking towards the bathroom while stripping her work-out clothes.

I took a deep calming breath and fought the urge to follow her. I had a plan and a schedule I needed to keep on. I was slightly nervous for only one reason though.

And she was currently in our condo shower.

It wasn't like I was keeping Samantha a secret from my family. I just felt like I needed to enjoy her as _mine_ for a while before our relationship got tangled into my sister's like it had in high school. All they knew was that we reconciled and were very close friends. I never elaborated any further.

I checked my briefcase one last time and made sure I had all the blueprints and contracts with me. I had already went through a lot of it with my lawyer but I knew if Ashley was the least bit interested, she'd want to take them to her own lawyer as well.

The shower was still going ten minutes later when there was a knock on the door. I frowned because I wasn't expecting any company. I peeked through the peephole and cursed slightly. "Seriously?" I sighed and opened the door just in time to hear the shower shut off. "What are you doing here?"

"Fuck you." Spencer frowned before pulling me into a hug. "I figured we'd surprise you but clearly it was an unwelcome one." She pulled back with a sulk.

"Shut up. I'm totally happy to see you guys." I smiled genuinely and wrapped myself around Ashley. "Especially you." I chuckled.

"Some things never change." Spencer rolled her eyes and playfully pulled me off her woman.

"We've missed you Baby C." Ashley looped her arm in mine and walked me into my own kitchen.

"Where are the kids?" I asked and offered to pour coffee but they both declined.

"Jaiden has them back at the hotel. She's taking them to a matinee show this afternoon." Spencer explained and then her ears perked up at sounds coming from the bedroom. "Oh… company?"

"Uh, the maid?" I chuckled nervously and licked my lips, glancing back at the closed door.

"Are you banging the maid?" Ashley whispered loudly and shook her head. "What about Sammy? I thought you two would've made up by now seeing as it's been months since you confessed your not so secret dying love for her on live television."

"I'm not banging the damn maid." I huffed. "I'm not that person."

"Hey Alexis, would you mind rubbing lotion on my- Jesus Spencer, Ashley!" Samantha squealed in shock, covering her bare chest up with the t-shirt she was holding in her hands. "Hi!" She waved awkwardly in only her underwear.

Spencer and Ashley shared a look of disbelief before looking at me with wide eyes and then looking back at a blushing Sam, who was quickly putting her shirt on.

"The maid huh?" Spencer raised an eyebrow but couldn't contain a smirk threatening to spill.

"And I'm pretty sure you're banging her." Ashley teased.

"Uh, surprise?" I chuckled before my sister and Ashley laughed and pulled Sam and I in a huge group hug.

"I'm still feeling a little exposed here." Samantha muttered with a quiet snicker when we all pulled a part. She quickly ran back to the bedroom to put a pair of pants and a bra on.

"I knew you two were meant for each other!" Ashley gave me a high five.

"I knew you were hiding something big when you were laying low." Spencer shook her head and patted my head but it was no use in trying to dodge her hand. Some things never changed.

/

**~*Jaiden's PoV*~**

"Your parents are going to kill me." I muttered and cradled a crying Matthew to my chest while Lucas tried her best to calm her brother down.

"I didn't mean to trip him." Dylan sniffled and I smiled softly at her.

"I know Dyl." I squeezed her hand and then ran my fingers through the thick curls of Matthew's head. "How's he looking, Doctor Luc?"

"Well, he has a small bloody scrape on his right knee that needs cleaning." Lucas said serious and kissed above the small cut.

"Let's get him back to the hotel so we can clean it and put a Band-Aid over it." I kissed Matthew's forehead and he looked at me with his large green watery eyes.

"Ow." He mumbled and sucked on his finger.

"I know big boy but you're doing a real good job being brave." I smiled down at him and he calmed down slightly. "We're going to make you feel as good as new, okay?"

Matthew just stared at me so I scooped him up in my arms and ignore putting him in the stroller. The hotel was only a block away so Lucas pushed the stroller beside me while Dylan held my free hand.

Once in the hotel, I placed Matthew down on the bed and kneeled in front of him. "Still owwie?"

He nodded but he was no longer crying. He reached his fingers out and traced my face before letting out a shit eating grin. "Booful lady!"

"Aww, you charmer." I chuckled and tickled his belly. "You're definitely a Charming Carlin."

Lucas giggled and put down the first aid kit she found in the bathroom. "It runs through the Davies blood, too." She turned and winked at her sister, who finally cracked a smile.

Once Lucas helped me get Matthew's cut cleaned up, I put him down for a nap and then quietly pulled Dylan to the side. "Hey." I whispered and slid on the floor next to her. "Why are you so quiet?"

"My parents will be mad at me for tripping him. Not you." Dylan shrugged.

"You didn't do it on purpose, Dyl. Accidents happen and your brother is going to experience a lot more falls." I wrapped my arm around her shoulders. "He's okay. You're okay and your parents won't be mad at you. I promise."

"I guess." She mumbled. "Matthew is like a glass baby to them. If he breaks, it'd kill them."

"I think they're like that with all of you. Spencer and Ashley don't want to see any of you get hurt, no matter how big or small." I nudged her a bit. "So stop blaming yourself, okay?" I wiped a tear from her cheek.

"We didn't even get to go see the movie." Dylan sighed heavily.

"That's okay. We can see a movie any old time. I was thinking that once Matthew wakes up from his nap, we could go to the zoo." I whispered as if it were a secret.

Her big brown eyes widened in excitement and she grinned. "Really?"

"Of course! I'd have to call and ask your parents first but I can't see them saying no. If anything they might make it back in time to tag along." I stood up and pulled her up on her feet with me. "Now let's go watch something on T.V. while I make a phone call to your Momma."

/

**Thank you.**


	120. Let's Get Down to Business

_**A/N: **I know, I suck, I'm a terrible person, what more do you want me to say? ... This is short but it's there. I hope you enjoy! Thank you to every single one of you who has not given up on this fic. For those who still review and beg, you're appreciated and I will show you just how much once this fic is for seriously complete._

**86 - Let's Get Down To Business**

**~*~Ashley's PoV~*~**

_Carlin-Davies._

It was official. Those two last names were legally intertwined together on a piece of paper - and on a large billboard above a modern new looking building that was now the head quarters for our business in B.C.

"C & D Records." Alex winked at me and raised her beer bottle, clingy it against my coke glass.

Spencer cheered loudly and pulled me into a huge hug. "I knew you'd be back in the business."

Okay, so the name Carlin-Davies wasn't meant for Spencer and myself. Alex and I officially had a business starting up. It'd probably take a while for us to get every single detail together, and then bands to have faith in us to get them noticed.

"Does this mean we'll be moving to B.C.?" Lucas asked with hesitance in her voice.

"No." I smiled and kissed her head. "But Aunt Alex is and I'll be in charge of a lot of the paper work from home … in Kenora." I assured her.

"Good, because I can't be away from Jaid." She smiled and skipped her way through the party crowd we had in our living room.

"Congrats!" Ryn came up to me and gave me a hug. "The school's probably going to miss you though."

"I'm not leaving the school." I raised an eyebrow.

"Oh, I just figured you'd be so busy with your new business." Ryn tilted her head to the side. "Between that and your family I was just…"

"Assuming." I finished for her with a kind smile. "I know it'll be a lot at first but I've managed Alex, while running a label and raising Dylan when she was younger. It'll be familiar territory." I winked and patted her shoulder. "Plus, if it all proves to be too much, I know where my priorities are." I looked over to a laughing Spencer, who was hanging onto Sammy's arm while talking to a few soon to be executives in our up incoming business.

Ryn excused herself and I was left alone, leaning against the island counter. I tapped my fingers against the counter top and observed my surroundings. Surroundings I never thought I'd ever see again.

Black ties and tight dresses were scattered around my living room, looking as if they walked right off of Hollywood Blvd. It was surreal to have so many high and important people in my living room in a small, middle of nowhere, town. Alex definitely did something right and I had to applaud her for her taste.

"Hey gorgeous, fancy seeing you in my kitchen." Spencer walked up to me and slid a hand down my arm teasingly. Her greyish eyes were sparkling and I had to smirk.

"You're buzzed, aren't you Carlin?" I eyed the tie around her neck and she grinned devilishly.

"Maaaybe." She drew the word out flirtatiously and winked. "Chase and Ephiny offered to take the kids for the night. Once the party files out of here, we can have a little private party of our own."

"Hmm," I hummed and grasped the black tie, pulling her to me. "I'm thinking that's a brilliant idea."

"I know it is." Spencer playfully scoffed and leered at me through glossy eyes. "I thought of it."

I chuckled and kissed her, my hands bunching up her blonde hair as the kiss grew a little deeper than I had intended. Then again, a buzzed Spencer Carlin was pretty much like a drunk Spencer Carlin. Those times always lead to somewhere good, somewhere very good but not during a house full of professional guests. I gently pushed her back and she pouted at me.

"Don't give me that look. We've already given these people a free peep show. I'd like to keep the real sexy stuff to ourselves." I whispered and squeezed her hip, pecking her lips once more.

Alex decided to join us at that moment with Sammy at her side. "So I figured out which band I'd like to start with."

"Oh?" I placed my coke down on the counter and wrapped an arm around Spencer's waist, holding her close to my side. "Anyone in the local area?"

"No." Alex held up her hands, which told me I needed to be patient as she pled her case. "They're actually from New York. I met them when I was on RJ Live. I think they're perfect and if we can get them to send us a demo…"

"Say no more." I smiled at her. "If this is the band you want then I trust you."

"Yeah?" Alex's grey eyes lit up and she bounced up and down, clapping. "Okay, cool. I'll look into setting up a meeting with them once things are straightened out." She hugged me tightly and scowled when Spencer shoved her away. "Is she drunk?"

"Yup." I shrugged and kissed Spencer's cheek.

"Go feel up your own girlfriend." Spencer flipped her sister off and I shook my head, grabbing her hands and holding them with my own.

"Spence, remember who our guests are." I whispered and she shrugged.

"Everyone looks preoccupied. I doubt they'll remember half of what will go on as the night progresses." Spencer raised an eyebrow and sucked back the rest of my coke. She looked at the empty glass and smiled crookedly at me. "I'll get you another coke, babe."

I nodded and watched her dance her way to the fridge.

"Ash!" Jaiden tapped me on the shoulder and held up two backpacks. "I'm bringing the little brats to my house now. Is there anything I can do before I gather up Matthew's things?"

"Nope." I smiled and had her follow me up to the bedroom. I dug in my purse and pulled out some cash. "Can I trust you to give this money to your parents?" I pulled my hand back just as she was about to snatch it from my hand.

"I get fifty percent." Jaiden raised a challenging eyebrow. "Seeing as they'll be hogging my bed tonight while you and Spencer can jump each other."

"Hey now." I laughed and gave her the money, trusting that she'd probably give it to Chase and Ephiny. Probably. Maybe.

"It's true." Jaiden shrugged and winked, tucking the bills in her pocket. "They'll get this, don't worry. I owe them anyway for buying me a tank of gas."

"Good." I patted her shoulder and turned her around, playfully shoving her out the door. "Now go get my children out of this house. I don't like them being exposed to late night drunken adults."

Jaiden snorted and saluted as she quickly ran down the stairs to gather up the kids.

I leaned against the railing at the top of the stairs and took in the house full of strangers and soon to be coworkers. I was hoping I'd be able to pick up where I left off with working in a record company. Ryn was somewhat right, it'll be a handful. I gave it up once for Dylan, I knew I'd be able to do it again if it proved to be too much work.

* * *

**~*~Spencer's PoV~*~**

"I'm sorry, she's just on the other line, can I take a message?" I heard Lucas answer the phone and after a few hums and polite pleasantries, the phone hung up.

"Who was that?" I asked as I put my earrings in and checking over my outfit one last time.

"Someone for Momma. She told me to hold all calls until further notice. I think she's laying down with a migraine or something." Lucas shrugged and looked me up and down. "You look really nice, Ma, what's the occasion?"

Ashley had a migraine? I frowned and moved past Lucas. "I have a meeting this afternoon at work." I smiled and made my way up to our bedroom. Opening the door, I found Ashley curled up on the bed with all the blinds shut and a pillow over her head.

"Spence?" She mumbled and lifted her head up, squinting slightly. "I thought you had a meeting?"

"In forty-five minutes." I whispered and sat beside her, running my fingers through her hair. She moved so that her head was on my thigh. "How are you feeling? Luc said you had a headache?"

"I haven't had this bad of a migraine since my first few weeks in rehab." Ashley confessed and sat up, groaning in pain as she did so.

I looked at her sadly and pressed a kiss to her forehead. "Well Lucas is capable of taking care of Dylan and Matthew while I'm gone. I'll only be an hour, if that. Ryn would take the meeting but I've been working the case since the beginning, so…" she stopped me with two fingers on my lips.

"I understand." She kissed me softly. "I think I'm just worn out from working constantly. I don't know what I'm going to do once school starts up again." Ashley sighed heavily and shook her head. "I think I'm going to have to give something up."

I wrapped my arm around her neck and nodded. "Whatever you choose though, I'm right there with you."

"I know." She smiled goofily. "That's exactly why I love you."

"Hmm, and here I thought it was because of the hot amazing sex." I winked and she laughed, nodding again.

"That too." She gave me a nose crinkle smile and pressed her lips against mine in a chaste kiss. "I can't believe I'm marrying you next month."

"Speaking of which," I stood up and straightened out my clothes before pointing at her accusingly, "you still have to tell me where exactly the wedding plans are."

Ashley shook her head. "All you need to worry about is finding your perfect dress and showing up. My team has it all under control."

"Your team? Ashley, your team? Who is in this team of yours?" I asked, raising an eyebrow. That woman was laughing and shaking her head even more. She wasn't going to tell me about her team. Huh.

"Just show up on our wedding day. You will not be disappointed." Ashley chuckled and laid back down.

"Our wedding day. Ours. Shouldn't I be included in the plans?" I asked, inching towards the door.

"You're the bride. The best part, baby." Ashley winked and waved me off. "Now go to work so you can come back and take care of me."

"You're lucky I love you, Davies." I smirked and she nodded.

"Trust me, I know." She blew me a kiss then rolled over and closed her eyes.

My meeting lasted a little longer than I had anticipated but it was a positive outcome. Twin siblings Johnny and Jenny were officially transferred into an adoption agency where they had great people waiting to welcome them into their home.

I swung by the Dairy Queen and grabbed a treats for everyone. Ashley craved ice cream after her headaches so I knew she'd be happy to see the large oreo blizzard I chose for her.

I was greeted with squeals from the kids when I handed them their butterscotch sundaes and Matthew dug into his as if he'd never tasted ice cream before. "No leaving the kitchen until you're washed up. Luc, please help your brother clean up if I'm not back downstairs, okay?" She nodded with a smile and shooed me away.

Approaching the bedroom door, I could hear soft music coming from inside. I knocked softly before opening the door and peering inside. Ashley was completely passed out with the pillow over her eyes still but soft music was playing from the laptop. I smiled and gently closed the lid, pushing the laptop aside and sitting next to the sleeping body. "Ashley." I nudged the pillow away before running my fingers down her face softly. "Ash?"

Ashley frowned slightly before she stretched and sleepily blinked. "Spence?"

"Mhmm." I hummed and leaned forward, placing a chaste kiss to her forehead. "I have something for you."

"A pony?" Ashley yawned and I gave her a quizzical look. She chuckled and rubbed her face before shaking her head. "Sorry, I had a weird dream."

"I bet." I nudged her before handing her the oreo blizzard. "I thought you'd be needing one of these."

"Oh my God, best fiancée ever!" Ashley sat up and took her first bite, moaning as she slowly pulled the spoon from her lips. "So. Good."

I snickered and licked my lips. "Well I think I'll just leave you two alone…" I went to get up from the bed when she grabbed my wrist and pulled me back down. She fed me a small spoonful of her blizzard and grinned when I echoed her earlier moan.

"You know, there's room for the three of us in here." She shoveled over and I scooted up against the headboard with her.

"You're so cute." I chuckled and kissed her cheek before stealing another bite of her blizzard. "How are you feeling?"

Ashley smiled softly. "Much better, thank you. Lucas made sure I had a cool cloth for my head at all times and Dylan kept Matthew occupied quietly. Everything is almost normal." She ended the sentence with a pout.

"What would make it completely normal?" I asked softly.

"Spencer kisses." She replied, feigning shyness.

I took the blizzard and placed it on the bedside table before tackling her to the bed. "Spencer kisses, hm?" I grinned slyly and lowered my body on top of hers. It was hot as hell outside my girl was only wearing a tank top with a pair of short shorts so the amount of skin had been enticing the moment I walked into the room before my meeting.

"Yes, Spencer kisses." She breathed when I straddled her and got rid of my dress shirt. She groaned and ran her hands up my waist, her fingers inching up my ribcage. She sat up and barely brushed her lips against mine. "Kiss me," she whined softly.

I couldn't deny her that sexy plea and pressed my lips against hers in a desperate kiss. The room was quickly heating up as her hands found the clasp of my bra. "Ash." I murmured and pulled back, our chests heaving and eyes heavy with arousal. "I- the kids are downstairs and as much as I'd love to continue this," I ran my fingers down her chest, licking my swollen lips, "they'll be knocking on the door any second."

Ashley huffed and fell back on the bed in a huff. She laughed when there was a knock on the door.

"Told you." I sang and got off of her and stripped the rest of my work clothes. I threw on a pair of jean shorts and a loose fitting t-shirt.

"Mom? Momma?" Dylan called out from the hallway.

"Come in." Ashley ran a hand through her hair and grabbed her blizzard from the bedside table. "We'll continue this later, Carlin." She whispered at me before Dylan opened the door.

"Hey cutie." I greeted Dylan and she gave me a big grin.

"Can we go to the movies tonight?" She asked excitedly.

"We who?" Ashley asked and patted the bed to invite Dylan to share some of her treat.

"Us!" Dylan animatedly swung her hand around the room and pointed downstairs. "The family."

"Do you know what's playing, baby?" Ashley asked.

"Despicable Me!" Dylan grinned and looked at me with her chocolate brown eyes, pouting. "Please Mom?"

"Yes." I answered immediately and Ashley swung her head to look at me, slightly surprised. "What?" I whined and pointed to the small brunette sitting in the middle of the bed, eating her mother's blizzard. "It's your fault you made her so damn cute and irresistible. Plus she never asks for anything."

Ashley smirked and made a small whipping sound. Dylan glanced at us confused before shrugging. She leapt off the bed and gave me a big hug before yelling to her siblings that we had a family date. She took off excitedly downstairs while singing "we're going to the movies!"

"I may be whipped by our nine year old but you're just as whipped with all three of them as well." I pouted and she grinned. "Besides, we'll wear them out tonight so we can have some uninterrupted grown up time." I winked.


	121. No Rest for the Insatiable

_This was a long time coming. Sorry it's short, I definitely wanted it longer but I'm breaking chapters down into certain parts. I honestly only have about 5 more chapters to go (hopefully). This chapter can be considered a small filler but it does have certain details. (A shocker perhaps?) _

_Thanks for waiting patiently, I promise you'll be rewarded with a finished fic! You people are amazing._

**Note: Rated Hard R for soft smut.**

**Enjoy!**

**87 – No Rest for the Insatiable**

**~*~Spencer's PoV~*~**

You would think that I was used to starting my days extra early. During high school I had morning hockey practices and then did a full day of school afterwards. In college, I pretty much did the same thing only a lot stricter. After I blew my knee out, that ended my hockey career and early morning practices. However, I still had school and a three-year-old daughter to take care of. So early mornings were second nature to me. Even after I moved to Kenora and landed a job being Coach, I was still up at the ass crack of dawn for practices.

My life revolved around early mornings, practices, kids and hockey.

But that morning I wasn't ready to crawl out of bed. I didn't have kids to take care of because all three of them were in Midtown with their grandparents. Chase and Ephiny took Jaiden to check out York University and offered to accompany the kids.

Ashley was the first to say yes to that. It had been a few days since then and I literally could not move my body. It was physically spent from all the unthinkable and unimaginable things my fiancée had done to me. I had no clue my body could bend that way or that she could do that thing with her tongue.

"Ash, you fucking broke me you bitch." I mumbled with a slight groan.

"Shut up, you enjoyed every second of it." Ashley laughed as she sauntered out of the bathroom, naked and freshly showered. "You better get your sweet ass out of bed before I go for an encore."

"No!" I whined. "My body is bruised and broken."

"Oh stop being a baby." Ashley snickered and smacked my ass gently. "I've seen you take harder hits and body checks in your hockey career and you never once complained."

"But this is different. I didn't have my legs above my head for that long while I was being thoroughly fucked with a strap on." I sat up and stretched my aching muscles.

"Oh okay, I'll never _thoroughly_ fuck you like that again." Ashley stopped looking for her clothes and turned around, staring at me with a challenged eyebrow.

"Hey now, no need to get hasty." I chuckled when she rolled her eyes at me. "Me being this sore and whiney is a compliment, my lady."

"Then suck it up, Barbie. Get your ass out of that bed, shower and help me load our luggage into the car so we can catch our flight in a few hours." Ashley jumped on the bed and straddled me, her lips sealed against mine in a soft yet passionate kiss. "I'm sorry if I was rough with you."

"You weren't." I whispered and trailed my hands down her bare back. "I'm just being a baby." I gave her a lopsided grin and wrapped my hand in her hair, kissing her with more pressure. "Pay back will be fun though." I nipped at her bottom lip and she gasped, her hands clutching at the sheets.

"Hey!" She shrieked when I flipped her over and kissing her deeply. I muffled her poor protests and finally she started kissing me back just as deeply.

We had a plane to catch and it took two hours to drive to the airport but if I could rock her world quickly, we'd have nothing to worry about.

/

**~*Ashley's PoV*~**

Her lips were everywhere and anywhere. My stomach tensed with anticipation when she slid down my body. Her lower lip grazing my skin while her bluish grey eyes starting at me, daring me to protest one more time.

I couldn't.

Spencer had that effect on me and I wouldn't want to change that for anything. I was putty in her hands and enjoyed every single second.

My hands weaved through her silky blonde hair while she nipped at my hipbones, causing me to arch and gasp. I swallowed heavily, my mouth already feeling dry from all the panting she was causing me.

"Aw," she whispered against the inside of my right thigh, "you just showered and I made a mess of you again." A low throaty chuckle escaped her throat when she dragged a finger against my wet entrance and groaned when I tugged at her hair unintentionally, my hips jumping off the bed.

"Spence." I moaned and hoped she'd take pity on me. She did. She _so _did.

My breath hitched when she crawled up my body but her fingers found themselves sliding inside me with a hard and fast rhythm. She was kissing me deeply, stealing my oxygen as she hit every mark deep inside.

I couldn't focus on anything but the feeling of her and her lips. Her harsh pants against my face were enough to send me right over the edge … over and over.

"Fuck." I groaned and arched further into her body as she started another round with her whole body pushing against me.

It was safe to say we might possibly miss our flight if things kept going where they were going.

/

I inhaled the thick smoggy air of Toronto as Spencer and I walked out of the overcrowded airport. Sunglasses perched on the top of our heads since the sun was getting ready to set.

We never missed our flight but if we were twenty minutes later, we would have. It had been nice to take advantage of an empty house for three whole days; three whole days of doing absolutely nothing but each other.

It was like high school all over again.

I probably had a stupid grin on my face even though I was completely exhausted. Spencer was yawning but her stupid grin was plastered on her face as well, so it was safe to say being exhausted was completely worth it.

With all the physical activities we involved ourselves in, I forgot about the reason why we just landed in Toronto and heading to Midtown.

I, Ashley Avery Davies, was going to marry Spencer Dylan Carlin in just two days.

Two days.

"Carlin-Davies?" A man stepped in front of us holding up a sign with our names on it. I looked at him confused but nodded. "There's a limo waiting for you right this way."

Spencer glanced at me while she grabbed the handle of her wheelie suitcase and I shrugged. "I thought we were renting a car?"

"Me too." I whispered while we followed the young guy dressed in black. "I'm sorry, but we were supposed to rent a car."

The young guy smiled. "Compliments of the Dennison family. They said they wanted you to just relax for the night so I'll be taking you to the Ritz-Carlton." He opened the door and watched we shuffled in with confused looks on our faces.

"I feel like I'm in an Angelina Jolie and Denzel Washington suspense movie." I muttered and frowned when Spencer chuckled, squeezing my hand.

"I highly doubt that young man is a bone collector of any kind, Ash." She kissed my cheek and pulled me close to her side. "I'll protect you though."

I smiled at her and nodded, snuggling closer. "Why would they think we'd need more time to relax?"

"To be fair," Spencer tilted her head to the side and played with my fingers that were splayed in her lap, "we haven't exactly relaxed since the kids have been away."

I gasped and raised an eyebrow. "Do I not relax you, Carlin?"

She laughed and shrugged. "Sure, if you consider the activities we've been up to, relaxing. I was thinking maybe tonight we can soak in the hot tub together then curl up and watch a boring movie on TV before sleeping all night."

I eyed her up and bit my lip, smiling at her beautiful face. "I think that sounds the most relaxing idea ever."

"No sex." She stated firmly.

"Spence!" I whined and she shook her head. She wouldn't give me a chance to protest so I had no choice but to resign. "Fine. But come our honeymoon, you don't get to call the shots."

Spencer barked out a laugh and shook her head. "We'll see about that."

I smiled and kissed her cheek. "You know you have me whipped, baby. It's no fair. You can at least allow me to think I have a fighting chance."

"Mmm." Spencer turned her head and rested her forehead against mine. "I'll let you call some shots. I promise."

Two more days and that woman would be my wife.

/

**~*~Alex's PoV~*~**

"Are you sure they're ready?" Sammy came up behind me. I was standing in the back of a warehouse where the first band we signed up on our label was rehearsing.

"Of course they are, babe." I smiled and leaned into her embrace. "Stop freaking out, Cera is the best I've heard in a long time and they're New York based. They're ready."

"I just want the Davies-Carlin wedding perfect." Sammy pouted and kissed my neck before letting me go. "Kyla has been driving me crazy about the details on which songs they'll be singing and Ashley wanted to make sure they learned 'She Is A Mystery' for the first dance."

"Okay, they need to trust me with this part and not worry about it. That's why I'm in charge of the music so they could focus on the other details. Tell them to stop worrying. Lia and her band mates are perfect and they learn quick. I have more confidence in them than I do in my next upcoming album." I stated positively and turned to kiss Samantha softly. "You need to stop worrying too, okay? Trust me?"

"I do. I'm just so excited and nervous." Sammy nearly bounced on the balls of her feet before glancing up at the band as the music stopped.

"Is everything okay?" I asked as Lia and Seth, the bass guitarist, jumped off the makeshift stage.

"First of all, we can hear every single word you're saying in our earpieces." Lia raised an eyebrow with a smile and threw me her earpiece.

"Yeah and just so you know, we're no strangers to playing at weddings. We rocked our friend's wedding so hard, everyone was pretty much pregnant afterwards." Seth smirked and blew a bubble with her gum. "We're that good, princess." She winked at Samantha and I rolled my eyes at her constant flirting with my girl.

"Seth, please don't start with the flirting. Sam's taken." Hannah, the drummer wrapped an arm around Seth's waist.

"I know but it's fun." Seth shrugged. "I'd never actually do anything, you know that right?" She asked me in a sincere tone.

"I know. Trust me, I get it. She's hot." I chuckled and bumped my hip with my Sammy's.

"Anyway, we're ready to catch a flight to Midtown and have some fun!" Lia rubbed her hands together with a grin on her face.

"All of the music is stored away in our brains and we're set. I promise." Hannah crossed her heart.

"Okay, well the wedding is in two days so go pack your bags. We have a flight out first thing in the morning. We'll be meeting Ashley tomorrow afternoon but Spencer doesn't know about any of this so if you see her, please do not approach her." I stressed. My sister had met the band a couple of times and I'd hate to have her suspicions raised if she found one of them wondering around.

"Well she did invite us to her wedding, Boss. I'm sure she won't think anything of it." Seth smacked me on the ass and winked.

Oh. Right.

"And you tell me to stop stressing." Sammy whispered in my ear and laughed. "It'll be good, Alexis. You're right, they're ready, and so I can report back with a positive outcome."

"I'm actually really excited about this. I feel like we've been planning this wedding since they were seventeen." I laughed as Sammy grabbed my hand and we made our way outside to get some fresh Vancouver air. "I'm sure they would've eloped back then anyway." Sammy shrugged and leaned against the brick wall. She frowned and shook her head when I mumbled, "I'm actually surprised they didn't."

Samantha Taylor shifted her eyes towards mine and linked our hands together. "You mean," she brought my hand to her lips, "like we did?"

"Exactly." I breathed with a smile and brought her lips to mine, kissing her soft and slow.

"I know we agreed not to tell anyone but as soon as Ash and Spence have their wedding bliss, we need to tell them." Sammy said quietly with a small smile. "You think they'll be mad?"

"Um," I laughed nervously, "yes. They'll be pissed but they'll get over it once we tell them that we're still planning an actual wedding." I snuggled her warm body against mine. "Plus once word is out that we're married, it'll be all over the tabloids and for now? I just want to enjoy the quiet married life with you."

"Me too." She whispered against my lips and stuffed her hands in my front pockets, leering at me with her smoldering blue eyes. "Want to go home?"

"Please." I practically whimpered and we ran back into the warehouse to help the band pack up their stuff as quickly as we could.

Samantha had asked me to marry her over a month ago and when I was said yes, I didn't think she meant right away. No one knew except Lia and her fiancée, RJ, since we needed witnesses. I struggled with not telling anyone in our families because I was afraid of being accused of keeping a huge secret again. Then I realized it was my secret to keep so it made the decision a lot easier.

Yeah, Spencer and Ashley will be pissed, possibly Lucas and Dylan too. But Samantha Taylor was now officially my wife and for that, I have no regrets in the decisions I have made.

"Let's go home, Superstar." She mumbled lowly in my ear and tugged me away from the locked up warehouse.

/


End file.
